Momwe Mungapezere Imodzi: Malangizo 13 Oyesedwa ndi Kuyesedwa

Mumapeza bwanji ameneyo? Chikhumbo chokhala ndi munthu m'modzi wapadera uja woti mugawane naye moyo wanu, kulumikizana ndi mzimu, munthu yemwe mungamuuze zakukhosi kwanu ndikulankhula zopanda pake pamoyo wanu watsiku ndi tsiku kwakulitsa zilakolako zachikondi kwautali womwe ungakumbukire. Choncho, n'zosadabwitsa kuti ngakhale masiku ano ndi m'badwo wa nthawi yomweyo kugwirizana motsogozedwa ndi Yendetsani chala pa zenera, inu mumadzipeza mukufuna kuti kugwirizana wapadera kuti mukhoza kulenga pamene inu simungakhoze kukhala popanda.

M'malo mwake, sikungakhale kofikira kunena kuti kutopa ndi kutayika kwamalingaliro komwe kumadza chifukwa cha chibwenzi chamakono kwapangitsa chikhumbo chokumana ndi munthu wapadera ndikumanga ubale wokhalitsa naye wamphamvu kuposa kale. Koma chizoloŵezi chonse chokhala ndi zibwenzi komanso kugwirizana kwachangu komwe kumatuluka mwamsanga kungathenso kusiya munthu wokayikira za chiyembekezo chawo. Mwina ena mwa inu amadzifunsanso kuti, “Kodi ndidzamupeza?”

Chabwino, mukhoza ndipo mudzatero. Tili pano kuti tikuthandizeni paulendowu, womwe umaphatikizapo kukhala mtundu wanu womwe uli woyenera yemwe mukufuna kugawana naye moyo wanu komanso kuyang'ana malo oyenera ndikutsegula mtima wanu ndi malingaliro anu kuti musaphonye zizindikiro zoyambirira zomwe mwapeza.

Kodi Kupeza Mmodzi Kumatanthauza Chiyani?

Kodi kupeza imodzi kumatanthauza chiyani? Ndipo mungadziwe bwanji kuti ndi munthu? Kuti muthe kuyankha mafunsowa molondola, choyamba muyenera kutanthauzira kupeza tanthauzo lake. Izi ndizofunikira chifukwa, m'chikhalidwe chodziwika, nthawi zambiri timawona ma romcom ndi nthano zikuwonetsa lingaliro la "ameneyo" ngati munthu wopanda cholakwika, wokhala ndi moyo wabwino yemwe amafufuza mabokosi onse. Koma m'moyo weniweni, maubwenzi okondana amakhala ovuta komanso ovuta.

Pezani tanthawuzo limodzi sikuyang'ana ungwiro, koma kupeza wina amene akumva ngati wangwiro kwa inu. Ngakhale kutanthauzira kokumana ndi munthu woyenera kumatha kukhala kosiyana kwa anthu osiyanasiyana, kumangofikira kupeza wina yemwe:

• Amagawana zomwe mumakonda
• Zimawonjezera mphamvu zanu ndi zofooka zanu
• Amakulandirani ndi zofooka zanu zonse
• Mangani mozama kulumikizana kwamaganizidwe ndi
• Pezani kuyanjana ndi kumvetsetsana ndi
• Amakhala bwenzi lanu, wokonda, ndi bwenzi
• Mutha kudziwona mukuwononga moyo wanu

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Malangizo 13 Oyesedwa ndi Kuyesedwa Kuti Mupeze Imodzi

Kukumana ndi chikondi cha moyo wanu ndikupeza chisangalalo chanu mpaka kalekale. Kukumana ndi munthu woyenera yemwe amapangitsa moyo wanu kukhala wowala ndikukhala momwemo. Chibwenzi ndi kupeza amene yomweyo. Awa ndi malingaliro abwino omwe timakhala nawo nthawi zambiri tikamayamba kufuna kupeza bwenzi moyo wathu wonse, munthu yemwe tingathe kugawana naye. mgwirizano wa moyo ndi. Kenako, moyo umachitika ndipo umatipatsa cheke chenicheni.

Kutopa kwa swiping pa zibwenzi mapulogalamu. Kusweka mtima. Ubale wosasangalatsa. Zolinga zimenezo zagwedezeka. Ndipo mumadzifunsa kuti, "Kodi ndizovuta kupeza? Kodi ndingapezeko?" Ziribe kanthu kuti ulendo wanu wakhala wotani, ngati mukufuna kupeza chikondi chamuyaya ndi bwenzi lanu lenileni la moyo, tabwera kudzakutsogolerani pakufuna kwanu. Tiyeni tiwone maupangiri 13 oyesedwa komanso oyesedwa omwe angakuthandizeni kupeza imodzi ndikusintha ulendo wanu wachikondi:

1. Dzidziweni nokha pamlingo wozama

Mumadziwa bwanji kuti ndi munthu? Mumapeza bwanji ameneyo? Mutha kukhala ndi chiyembekezo komanso zokonda zanu mukamayesa kuthetsa zinsinsi izi, komabe yankho lili mkati. Kuti mupeze mnzako woyenera ndikupanga moyo wokhutiritsa wachikondi, muyenera kumvetsetsa nokha pamlingo wozama.

Muyenera kutenga nthawi kuti mufufuze zokhumba zanu, zosowa zanu, ndi zomwe mumakonda. Pokhapokha mungapeze bwenzi lomwe limakwaniritsa inu mwangwiro. Nazi njira zosavuta komanso zothandiza zodzifufuza zomwe zingakufikitseni pafupi ndi kupeza bwenzi lanu loyenera:

• Tengani cholembera ndi pepala, kapena gwiritsani ntchito pulogalamu yolembera, kuti musokoneze malingaliro anu ndikufotokozera malingaliro anu. Lembani za maloto anu, zokhumba zanu, ndi moyo wabwino wachikondi
• Pangani masomphenya gulu moyo wanu pachibwenzi. Sonkhanitsani zithunzi, mawu, ndi mawu omwe akugwirizana ndi ubale womwe mukufuna. Phatikizaninso zomwe mumakonda komanso komwe mukufuna kukafufuza ndi mnzanu wamtsogolo. Chiwonetsero ichi chidzasunga zosowa zanu ndikukulimbikitsani kuti muwonetsere
• Khalani pambali nthawi yabata kuti mukhale oganiza bwino, kudzilola kuti mukhalepo ndikusinkhasinkha za moyo wanu wachikondi. Ganizirani maganizo anu ndi mmene mukumvera mumtima mwanu, ndipo onani zimene zikuchitika. Mchitidwewu ukhoza kukuthandizani kuti mumvetsetse komwe muli paulendo wanu wachikondi komanso zomwe mukufunadi mwa mnzanu

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2. Fotokozani bwenzi lanu labwino (momveka bwino)

Kodi mukukumbukira masiku abwino akale pamene mnzanu wapamtima amakufunsani, "Kodi mungamufotokoze bwanji bwenzi lanu lamaloto?" kapena “Kodi mungayambe chibwenzi ndi mnyamata wotani?” Kupatula apo, kufotokozera wokondedwa wanu momveka bwino ndikofunikira kwambiri kusankha bwenzi la moyo wanu. Chifukwa chake, khalani ndi nthawi yosinkhasinkha ndikupanga mndandanda wa mikhalidwe ndi mikhalidwe yomwe mukufuna mwa mnzanu. Yesani malangizo awa:

• Lembani mndandanda wa makhalidwe omwe mumayamikira mwa mnzanu. Ganizirani za mikhalidwe yomwe ili yofunika kwa inu - izi zitha kukhala chilichonse kuyambira kukoma mtima mpaka kuwona mtima, kufuna kutchuka, nthabwala, kapena zomwe mumakonda.
• Mukamaganizira za mbendera zobiriwira, ndikofunikanso kupanga mndandanda wa mbendera zofiira kapena zizolowezi zomwe simukuzifuna mwa wokondedwa wanu.
• Ganizirani za mtundu wa chikondi chimene mukuyang'ana. Fotokozani zomwe simungakambirane pankhani ya zinthu zofunika kuziyang'ana muubwenzi. Mwachitsanzo, kodi mumafunafuna zosangalatsa komanso zosangalatsa, kapena mumakonda kukhala ndi moyo wocheperako?
• Ganizirani zomwe munakumana nazo m'mbuyomu, zomwe zidagwira ntchito ndi zomwe sizinachitike. Kulingalira uku kudzakuthandizani kumvetsetsa bwino za yemwe angakhale munthu wanu wangwiro

3. Yang'anani pa kukhala wopambana wa inu nokha

Musanayambe kuyesetsa kukumana ndi munthu wapadera, dzipangitseni kukhala woyenera kukhala wa munthu wina. Chitani ntchitoyi kuti mudziwitse malingaliro anu, machitidwe a zikhulupiriro, zofooka, ndi zofooka, ndikuchitapo kanthu kuti mukonze zomwe zikukulepheretsani kutsegula mtima wanu ndi moyo wanu ku chikondi chenicheni.

Kusintha machitidwe osayenera ndi omwe ali athanzi sikumangokuyikani pamalo abwino kuti mupeze bwenzi loyenera komanso kumakuthandizani kupanga ubale wabwino ndi iwo. Chifukwa chake, yang'anani pakukhala mtundu wabwino kwambiri wa inu nokha ngati mukufuna kupeza yemwe ali pachibwenzi.

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4. Osachita chifukwa chotaya mtima

"Chifukwa chiyani sindingathe kupeza mnzanga wapamtima?" "Ndidzamupeza kapena kukhala ndekha?" Malingaliro ngati awa ndi chisonyezo chakuti mukufuna kulumikizana ndi munthu wina kuchokera kumalo osimidwa komanso osowa - komanso osawoneka bwino. Mwina, abwenzi anu onse ali mu ubale wokhazikika, wodzipereka, ndipo izi ziyenera kukhazikika pa lingaliro lakuti, inunso, muyenera kupeza munthu m'modzi yemwe mungathe kugawana naye moyo wanu. (Kumbukirani Rajesh Koothrappali waku The Big Bang Chiphunzitsochi, ndi ganizo lake lopempha makolo ake kuti amukhazikitse ndi mtsikana chifukwa anzake onse anali okwatira. Ndipo momwe izo zinawombera mu nkhope yake.)

Mwina mumadziwa bwino kuti wotchi yachilengedwe ikuyenda, ndipo mukungofuna kupeza Mr./Ms. Nthawi isanathe. Komabe, izi si zifukwa zomveka zopezera bwenzi. Muyenera kukhala ndi munthu wina chifukwa simungaganizire kukhala moyo wanu mwanjira ina iliyonse, osayang'ana bokosi lazochita zamoyo.

Mukachita chotsiriziracho, chimadzaza ndi malingaliro osimidwa, zomwe zimakupangitsani kumamatira ndikukhazikika kwa munthu woyamba wogwirizana yemwe amabwera. Izi zimakupangitsani inu kugwidwa ndi zibwenzi zosasangalatsa, ndikukusiyani mukudzifunsa kuti, "Kodi ndizovuta kupeza munthu amene amandisangalatsa m'malo mwake?

5. Dzisangalatseni ndipo mudzakopa chikondi

Munayamba mwawonapo anthu omwe amawonetsa chisangalalo? Ali ndi chithumwa cha maginito chomwe chimawapangitsa kukhala osavuta kuwakonda komanso sungani motowo. Chabwino, apa pali chinsinsi chaching'ono: kupeza chikondi chenicheni kumayamba ndi kupeza chisangalalo mwa inu nokha. Zili ngati mphamvu yapamwamba yomwe imakopa chikondi m'moyo wanu.

Mukayika chimwemwe chanu patsogolo ndikudzisamalira nokha, mumakhala osatsutsika m'njira yabwino kwambiri. Choncho, pitirizani kuchita zinthu zimene zimakusangalatsani. Tsatirani zokonda zanu ndikuzungulirani ndi positivity. Yemwe akukufunirani inu adzapeza njira yofikira kwa inu.

6. Khalani ndi chikhulupiriro kuti chikondi chanu chenicheni chidzakupezani

Nkwachibadwa kumva chisoni pamene mwakhala mukuyesetsa kupeza chikondi chenicheni osaona zotsatira zimene mukufuna. Koma yesetsani kuti musamangoganizira zinthu monga, “Kodi ndidzapeza chikondi chenicheni?” M'malo mwake, khalani ndi chiyembekezo kuti munthu woyenera abwera m'moyo wanu panthawi yabwino.

Khulupirirani mphamvu ya positivity ndikukhulupirira kuti chilengedwe chili ndi dongosolo kwa inu. Gawo lililonse lomwe mutenge - ngakhale silikutsogolereni ku chikondi chanu chenicheni - likubweretsani pafupi ndi iwo. Chifukwa chake, khalani ndi chikhulupiriro chosagwedezeka paulendo wanu ndipo pitilizani kufufuza ndi mtima wa chiyembekezo. Kumbukirani, mukakhala ndi chikhulupiriro chochuluka pakufufuza kwanu chikondi chenicheni, mumawonjezera mwayi wopeza wanu mgwirizano wa moyo.

7. Khalani omasuka ku zochitika zatsopano

Landirani nthawi zosayembekezereka zomwe zingatsogolere ku chinthu chapadera, kaya ndikuyamba kucheza ndi munthu pamalo ogulitsira khofi (zitha kubweretsa zina. masiku abwino a khofi), kukumana ndi munthu paphwando, kapenanso kukumana ndi munthu paulendo. Simudziwa nthawi komanso komwe mungakumane ndi yomwe ili yanu.

Chokani m'malo anu otonthoza, yesani zochitika zatsopano, kapena lowani nawo magulu omwe akugwirizana ndi zomwe mumakonda. Izi zitha kukuthandizani kukumana ndi anthu amalingaliro ofanana omwe angakhale "amodzi". Nazi malingaliro angapo:

• Khalani ndi zokonda zatsopano, khalani nawo ku msonkhano kapena semina, kapena dziperekani pazifukwa zomwe mumakhulupirira. Izi zidzakudziwitsani kwa anthu osiyanasiyana, kukulitsa mwayi wanu wopeza bwenzi loyenerana nalo.
• Onani mapulatifomu, mabwalo, kapena magulu ochezera a pa intaneti okhudzana ndi mitu kapena zochitika zomwe mumakonda
• Yang'anirani zochitika zapafupi, zikondwerero, kapena maphwando omwe amagwirizana ndi zomwe mumakonda kapena zomwe mumakonda. Zochitika izi nthawi zambiri zimakopa anthu omwe ali ndi zokonda zofanana, zomwe zimapatsa malo omasuka komanso osangalatsa kuti akumane ndi munthu wangwiroyo

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8. Lankhulani ndi anzanu ndi achibale anu

Mukukumbukira momwe amayi anu adadziwira kuti chibwenzi chanu chakusekondale chingakunyengeni ndikukuswani mtima? Kodi mukukumbukira bwenzi lanu lapamtima likukuuzani momwe mnyamatayo aliri wabwino kwambiri kwa inu? Kunena zoona, ndani amene angathandize kuposa anthu amene amakukondani, amakudziwani, ndiponso amakuderani nkhawa kwambiri?

Ngati chibwenzi ndi kupeza amene sanakuthandizeni mpaka pano, pitirirani ndi kuwafunsa malangizo pa mtundu wa munthu muyenera kukhala pachibwenzi. Ngati simumasuka kuuza anzanu kapena abale anu za izi, yang'anani maanja omwe ali ndi thanzi ubale wautali. Afikireni kwa iwo ndi kukambirana moona mtima. Mutha kukhala ndi malingaliro amtengo wapatali.

9. Pitani komwe anthu ali ndi zokonda zanu

Kodi mumaipeza bwanji, mukufunsa? Mwa kungoyang'ana malo oyenera. Kufunafuna "momwe mungapezere wokondedwa wanga" kungakupangitseni kuganiza mozama kapena kuyesa mwamphamvu kuti mupeze munthu wangwiro amene angangolowa m'moyo wanu ndikukuchotsani. Koma monga tidanenera, polankhula za kupeza tanthauzo, chinsinsi ndikufunafuna munthu yemwe angakhale wangwiro kwa inu.

Kupeza munthu wamalingaliro ofanana ndi omwe mumagawana nawo zokonda ndi zokonda kungakhale poyambira bwino paulendo wanu wopeza yemwe simungakhale popanda. Kupatula apo, ndi chiyani chomwe chili chabwino kuposa kupeza malo omwe mungagwirizane nawo kuti mupange kulumikizana kowona?

Dave (27) wa ku Colorado, yemwe anakumana ndi bwenzi lake pamwambo wa pop-up, anati: "Samalani zizindikiro zoyambirira zomwe mwakumana nazo. Kukumana ndi chikondi cha moyo wanu, kapena kukumana ndi munthu woyenera nthawi zambiri kumabwera ndi malingaliro ozama a kugwirizana ndi kugwirizana.

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10. Pitani kwa mphunzitsi wa ubale kapena othandizira

Mukuda nkhawa kuti simudzapeza chikondi chenicheni? Ngati mukukumana ndi zovuta, funsani chitsogozo kwa katswiri wa ubale kapena wothandizila. Iwo akhoza kupereka zidziwitso zamtengo wapatali ndikukuthandizani kuti mumvetsetse bwino, kuwulula machitidwe ndikuwunika momwe mukumvera. Akhoza kukutsogolerani kuti mupeze bwenzi lanu lamoyo logwirizana.

Derek (35) wa ku Florida akutiuza kuti: “Mwina mwatopa chifukwa chosakumana ndi munthu woyenerera, kapena munthu amene munkaganiza kuti ndi amene sakufuna zinthu zofanana ndi inuyo ndipo anangotchula koyamba kuti mukuyang’ana. ubale weniweni. Ndiye, mungadziwe bwanji kuti ndinu munthu? Potengera zomwe zandichitikira, ndinganene kuti kufunafuna chitsogozo kuchokera kwa mphunzitsi wa ubale kapena mlangizi kungakhale kopindulitsa kwambiri muzochitika ngati izi. Atha kukuthandizani kuyenda ulendo wokumana ndi munthu wapadera. Kapena monga ine, kukumana ndi chikondi cha moyo wako! "

11. Muziika patsogolo mabwenzi

"Iwo amupezadi." Kodi mumamva chonchi mukamayang'ana banja lakuzungulirani? Atha kukhala amalume anu ndi azakhali anu, bwenzi lanu lapamtima ndi chibwenzi chake, kapena banja lakale lomwe lili mdera lanu. Zoonadi, nkhani zawo zachikondi zidzakhala zosiyana, koma mudzawona chinthu chimodzi chofanana - chiyanjano chawo chimamangidwa pa maziko a ubwenzi wolimba.

Ichi ndichifukwa chake kumanga maubwenzi ndikofunikira ngati mukufuna kupeza yemwe ali pachibwenzi kapena kupeza yemwe simungakhale popanda. Malangizo opangira: Munthu akamamva ngati bwenzi lapamtima, amakusekani ngakhale masiku achisoni, ndikukuthandizani kugawana zinsinsi zanu zonse popanda nkhawa, tengani lingaliro! Izi ndi zizindikiro zoyamba zomwe mwakumana nazo.

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12. Yesani mapulogalamu ochezera pa intaneti

Kodi ndipeza chikondi pa pulogalamu ya zibwenzi? Kodi kukhala pachibwenzi ndi kupeza yemwe ndi kotheka? Kodi ndi osowa kupeza mmodzi, makamaka m'badwo uno wa zibwenzi zamakono? Ngati munayamba mwadzifunsapo izi, dziwani kuti anthu ambiri apeza maubwenzi abwino kudzera pa chibwenzi pa intaneti.

Izi ndi zomwe zingathandize: chithunzi chokongola chambiri (zolemba za brownie ngati zili ndi galu wanu), mbiri yotsimikizika (chonde palibe mayunivesite abodza kapena nkhani zapaulendo), ndikupatula nthawi yodziwa machesi omwe mungathe. Tsopano, ngati mwakonzeka, nawa mapulogalamu ochepa odziwika pazibwenzi pa intaneti, makamaka a maubwenzi apamtima:

• Harmony
• Match.com
• OkCupid
• Kafi Ikumana Bagel
• EliteSingles
• Bumbuli
• Hinge
• Mgwirizano

13. Yesani masiku osaona

"Nditakumana ndi amayi ako, ndinamva ngati nditha kupuma," Jack Pearson wochokera Awa ndi Ife akuwuza ana ake. Anakumana ndi Rebecca pa tsiku lakhungu koma sanamve kugwirizana kolimba poyamba. Komabe, tsoka linali ndi zolinga zina. Anathamangitsananso madzulo atsiku limenelo. Pamene ankakambirana mozama, moto wamoto unayaka, ndipo anazindikira kuti pakati pawo panali chinachake chapadera.

Iye akukumbukira kuti patapita zaka zambiri, “Ndinkangofuna kupeza malo abata oti ndiwerenge buku langa, kenako ndinakuona.” Ndipo ndikuganiza kuti, ukakhala wosakwatiwa, ndipo ukuyesera kukhala, umadziwa kuti, “O, sindikusowa aliyense”, nthawi zonse pamakhala munthu m’modzi uyu, munthu m’modzi uyu amene amango…

Ngati mwatuluka posachedwapa muubwenzi wautali kapena kutaya chikhulupiriro mu chikondi chenicheni kapena maubale okhwima, deti losaona lingakhale lomwe mukufuna. Zitha kukhala zotonthoza ngati aloe vera pakhungu lotenthedwa ndi dzuwa - kukupatsani malingaliro atsopano komanso kuthekera kokumana ndi mnzanu wapamtima. Ndikhulupirireni, madeti akhungu ali ndi mwayi wodabwitsani m'njira zomwe simunaganizirepo!

Kumbukirani, ulendo wopeza ameneyo wadzaza ndi kudzizindikira, kukula kwaumwini, ndi mwayi wosangalatsa. Zachidziwikire, sizichitika tsiku limodzi, koma ndi malangizo awa m'malingaliro, simudzayenera kudikirira kosatha kapena kutaya chiyembekezo. Sangalalani ndi kukwera, khalani otsimikiza, ndipo khulupirirani kuti zabwino kwambiri zikubwera. Masewera anu abwino ali pomwepo, akudikirira kugawana nanu nkhani yachikondi yodabwitsa!

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