Ndi kangati takhala tikulakalaka kulumikizidwa ndi munthu wina - mtundu womwe umapangitsa mtima kuthamanga mailosi miliyoni pa mphindi ndikudumpha kugunda chikwi modabwitsa? Kulumikizana komwe kuli kosaipitsidwa komanso koyera ndipo kumangokhudza momwe mumamvera wina ndi mnzake. Romcoms imapangitsa kuti ziwoneke zosavuta kupeza munthu yemwe tingalumikizane naye m'malingaliro ndikukhala mosangalala mpaka kalekale. Koma kunena zoona, kodi zimenezi zimachitika kangati m’moyo weniweni?
Monga momwe zikuwonekera, kupeza kugwirizana kwamaganizo sikophweka monga kumanga mgwirizano wakuthupi kapena waluntha. Ngakhale zingamveke zophweka, sikophweka kugwirizana maganizo ndi anthu pambuyo pake. Nthawi zambiri timasokoneza kulumikizana kwamalingaliro ndi kumverera kwa chikondi. Izi zimabweretsa mafunso monga, "Kodi kugwirizana kwamalingaliro kumatanthauza chikondi?" Mwachidule, kulumikizana kwamalingaliro ndi mphamvu yomwe imagwirizanitsa chikondi.
Palibe njira imodzi yokha yolumikizirana wina ndi mnzake. Kulumikizana kwamalingaliro muubwenzi kumagwira ntchito mosiyana kwa maanja osiyanasiyana. Popeza tanthawuzo la kugwirizana kwamalingaliro ndilosiyana kwambiri, likhoza kusiyana pakati pa awiri ndi awiri. Koma kodi nthawi zina mumadabwa ngati mukugwirizana ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna wanu? Kapena mumada nkhawa kwambiri ngati muli ndi kugwirizana ndi munthu yemwe mwangoyamba kumene kumuwona? Chabwino, takupatsani inu.
Kodi Kugwirizana Kwamalingaliro Ndi Chiyani?
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Tisanapite ku ubwino ndi zizindikiro za ubale wamaganizo , choyamba tiyeni tiyese kumvetsetsa zamaganizo okhudza kulumikizana kwamaganizo. Kodi kulumikizana kwamaganizo n'chiyani? Ngakhale kuti mfundo zosiyana zimasiyana kwa munthu aliyense, tanthauzo loyambira lomwe limagwira ntchito kwa aliyense ndilakuti mfundo za mgwirizano wamaganizo ndi kusakaniza kwa malingaliro achilengedwe omwe amapanga mgwirizano pakati pa anthu awiri mwa kuwagwirizanitsa. Izi ndi malingaliro amphamvu omwe amalumikiza anthu awiri pamodzi kapena kupanga mgwirizano pakati pa wina ndi china chake.
Anthu amakhala ndi malingaliro osiyanasiyana - mkwiyo, chimwemwe, chimwemwe, chikondi, chisoni, ndi zina zotero. Amapanga maubwenzi ndi anthu otengera maganizo amenewa. Mukawayika pamodzi, kugwirizana kwamaganizo kumatanthauza mgwirizano wolimba ndi wina (mnzanu, mnzanu, makolo - angakhale aliyense) yemwe mumagawana naye malingaliro enaake.
Ngakhale kugwirizana kwamalingaliro ndikofunikira mu ubale uliwonse womwe timapanga, umakhala wofunikira kuti ubale wachikondi ukhalebe wolimba. Muyenera kumanga ubale wapamtima ndi mnzanu ngati mukufuna kuti ubale wanu ukhale wolimba ndikupulumuka mkuntho. Kupanda kugwirizana maganizo mu ubale kungayambitse kukhumudwa ndipo pamapeto pake kutha. Ndi chinthu chomwe chimapangitsa chikondi kukula ndi kuphuka.
Kudziwa wokondedwa wanu pamlingo wozama kumathandiza kumanga mgwirizano wamaganizo ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi. Kulankhulana wina ndi mzake, kugawana chimwemwe chanu ndi chisoni, kukhulupirirana wina ndi mzake, kusonyeza chikondi, ndi kukhala ofooka ndi osatetezeka wina ndi mzake ndi zochepa maganizo kugwirizana zitsanzo kuyang'ana mu ubwenzi. Izi zimathandizanso kuti mumvetse zomwe zimakondweretsa mnzanuyo kapena chisoni, zomwe zimamukhumudwitsa kapena kumukwiyitsa, momwe angachitire ndi zochitika zosiyanasiyana, kapena zomwe zimamupangitsa kulira.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Mafunso 20 Oyenera Kufunsa Mnzanu Kuti Mukhale Paubwenzi Wapamtima
Ubwino Wa Kulumikizana Mwamalingaliro Mu Ubale
Kulumikizana kwamalingaliro kumakhala ngati nangula muubwenzi womwe umathandiza onse awiri kuthana ndi mikuntho yomwe imabwera. Ubale sungathe kuyenda bwino popanda izo. Simungathe kudziwa kapena kuyandikira munthu wina ngati simukumva kuti mumalumikizana naye. Ndiwothandizanso m'maganizo ndi m'thupi lanu chifukwa umabweretsa chisangalalo choyera, chosasefedwa. Nawa maubwino angapo okhudzana ndi kulumikizana kwanu ndi ena ofunikira:
khazikitsani chibwenzi chomwe chimathandiza onse awiri kuthana ndi mikuntho yomwe imabwera. Ubale sungathe kuyenda bwino popanda izo. Simungathe kudziwa kapena kuyandikira munthu wina ngati simukumva kuti mumalumikizana naye. Ndiwothandizanso m'maganizo ndi m'thupi lanu chifukwa umabweretsa chisangalalo choyera, chosasefedwa. Nawa maubwino angapo okhudzana ndi kulumikizana kwanu ndi ena ofunikira:
- Zimapanga lingaliro lachitetezo ndi chitetezo
- Mumamva kuwonedwa, kumva, ndi kutsimikiziridwa
- Amatulutsa oxytocin ndi mahomoni ena omwe amakupangitsani kukhala osangalala komanso okondwa
- Zimamanga kulemekezana, kukhulupirirana, ndi chithandizo muubwenzi
- Zosowa zanu zamalingaliro zimakwaniritsidwa, zomwe ndizofunikira kuti mukhale ndi thanzi labwino komanso malingaliro
Zizindikiro 10 Zomwe Mumalumikizana Nazo Ndi Winawake
Nthawi zonse pali zizindikiro zomwe zimasonyeza kuti muli ndi chiyanjano chakuya ndi winawake. Zizindikirozi zitha kukuthandizani kudziwa ngati muli ogwirizana ndi mkazi/bwenzi lanu/chibwenzi/mkazi wanu kapena mumadalira ena kuti mukwaniritse kufunikira kolumikizana. Kapena angakuthandizeni kuzindikira mipatayo ndikukulitsa kulumikizana kwamalingaliro mu ubale wanu. Mulimonsemo, nazi zizindikiro 10 zotsimikizika za kugwirizana kwamalingaliro ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna:
1. Zizindikiro za ubwenzi wapamtima - Kukhulupirira wokondedwa wanu
Kudalirana ndiye maziko a ubale uliwonse wopambana . Popanda kutero, ubale ukhoza kutha posachedwa. Mukakhala ndi ubale wakuya ndi munthu wina, mumaphunzira kukhulupirirana. Kudalirana ndi umboni wakuti mumakhala otetezeka muubwenzi. Kudalira mnzanu kumatanthauzanso kuti mumamulemekeza.
Zopinga zimakhala zofala muubwenzi uliwonse koma, ndikukhulupirirana, mumadziwa kuti wokondedwa wanu ali ndi zokonda zanu. Simudzamva kuti ndinu otetezeka kapena osatetezeka pomwe kulumikizana kwamalingaliro ndi munthu wina wofunikira kuli kolimba chifukwa mumawadziwa ndikuwakhulupirira kuti ali ndi nsana wanu nthawi zonse.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Malangizo 9 Abwino Kwambiri Opangira Kudalirana Mu Ubale
2. Muli ndi mpata wotsutsana pa zinthu
Nthawi zina, mikangano imakhala yabwino . Kusamvana kumakhala kofala m'mbali zonse za moyo. Sikofunikira kugawana malingaliro ofanana kapena kukhala ndi maganizo ofanana pa zinthu monga mnzanu. Muubwenzi, munthu ayenera kukhala ndi ufulu wolankhula momasuka kusagwirizana kwake popanda mantha odzudzulidwa. Ndi khama lomvetsetsa mnzanu lomwe limafunikira. Pakakhala mpata wosagwirizana, zokambirana zimakhala zomveka bwino. Ndipo zikachitika, dziwani kuti muli ndi ubale wamphamvu wamaganizo ndi mnzanuyo.
3. Mumasiya kusamala za maonekedwe ndikugwirizanitsa mozama
Pazigawo zoyamba za ubale wanu, mumakonda kusamala momwe mumawonekera komanso mumaganizira kwambiri za maonekedwe anu. Koma, m’kupita kwa nthaŵi, mumasiya kusamala nazo. Mukusiya kudziyang'ana pagalasi nthawi zosachepera 10 musanakumane ndi mnzanu. Mumaona kuti muli ndi chidaliro pamapajama anu komanso momwe mumawonekera. Ubale umakwera pamwamba pa zinthu zachiphamaso monga mawonekedwe, ndipo makamaka umakhala wokhudza kumvetsetsana wina ndi mnzake ndikukhalapo wina ndi mnzake muzochitika zilizonse.
4. Mutha kukhala pachiwopsezo ndi okondedwa wanu
Ngati mukudabwa kuti zizindikiro za chibwenzi chamaganizo ndi ziti, ziwonjezereni pamndandanda wanu. Mosiyana ndi zomwe anthu ambiri amakhulupirira, kukhala wotetezeka ndi mnzanu ndi chizindikiro cha mphamvu osati kufooka. Kufotokoza zosowa zanu, mantha anu, ndi manyazi anu mosadziletsa komanso mosasokoneza kumasonyeza momwe mulili omasuka ndi mnzanuyo.
Pamene chiwopsezo chanu sichikuwoneka ngati cholemetsa chamalingaliro koma chikuvomerezedwa ndi kulabadira, ndipamene mumadziwa kuti mumagawana mgwirizano wamphamvu ndi wokondedwa wanu. Mukasiya kusamala kwanu, mumalumikizana ndi mnzanuyo pamlingo wozama komanso wapamtima. Kukhala pachiwopsezo kumabweretsa mtundu weniweni wa inu ndipo kuvomerezedwa momwe mulili ndi chizindikiro chotsimikizika cha kulumikizana.
5. Zitsanzo zokhudzana ndi maganizo - Kusamalira zinthu zazing'ono muubwenzi wanu
Pamapeto pake, tonse timadziwa kuti ndi zinthu zazing'ono zomwe zimawerengedwa. Mukakhala paubwenzi ndi mgwirizano wamphamvu wamalingaliro, inu ndi mnzanuyo mumayang'anitsitsa tsatanetsatane wa moyo watsiku ndi tsiku. Mumadziwa momwe amakonda kugawanitsa tsitsi lawo, momwe amatengera tiyi wawo, ndi zoweta zawo. Mumadziwa zomwe zimawabweretsera kumwetulira komanso zomwe zimawakwiyitsa.
Mitundu yazinthu zazing'ono zomwe mukudziwa za iwo zitha kukhala zazikulu kwambiri. Pokhapokha mukakhala ndi chiyanjano champhamvu ndi wokondedwa wanu chidziwitso choterocho chimabwera mwachibadwa kwa inu. Kusamalira zinthu zazing'ono zotere kumathandiza kuti muzolowerane komanso kumalimbitsa ubwenzi. Mumakulitsa chidwi chachilengedwe pazochitika "zosasangalatsa" za tsiku ndi tsiku. Umu ndi momwe psychology yolumikizirana imagwirira ntchito.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Malangizo 12 Osavuta Omanga Ubale Wathanzi
6. Mutha kuzindikira pamene chinachake chalakwika
Ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zamphamvu kwambiri za kugwirizana maganizo ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi. Kamvekedwe ka mawu awo kapena kaonekedwe ka nkhope zawo n’kokwanira kuti mumvetse kuti chinachake chasokonekera kapena chasokonekera. Mumakhala ozindikira kwambiri pozindikira ngati chilichonse chikhala chosiyana pakati panu. Mukakhala ndi chiyanjano chozama ndi munthu, kufotokoza chilichonse sikofunikira. Inu ndi wokondedwa wanu mumakhudzidwa kwambiri ndi malingaliro a wina ndi mzake. Simuyenera kufotokoza kuti tsiku lanu linali loyipa. Wokondedwa wanu amatha kuzizindikira ngakhale kuchokera palemba losavuta.
7. Kugawana chilichonse chokhudza moyo wina ndi mzake
Nthawi zonse zikachitika chinachake m'moyo wanu, chabwino kapena choipa, simungadikire kuti mugawane ndi mnzanuyo. Mumagawana nkhani zazikulu komanso zazing'ono ndi chisangalalo chomwecho. Mukalephera kuwauza, simumva kuti ndinu wathunthu kapena wokhutira. Ngakhale mungakhale ndi moyo wosiyana, kulankhulana kwabwino pakati pa inu ndi mnzanu kumapanga mtundu wa mgwirizano womwe ndi chizindikiro chotsimikizirika cha mgwirizano wamphamvu wamaganizo.
8. Kuyesera kutenga nawo mbali, kapena kumvetsetsa, chidwi cha okondedwa wanu
Muubwenzi wolimba kwambiri, inu ndi mnzanu nthawi zambiri mumachita zinthu zina kuti mumvetsetse bwino zomwe wina ndi mnzake amakonda. Mumayesetsa kumvetsetsa kufunika kwa chinthu china ndikuchilemekeza. Palibe aliyense wa inu amene adzatenga chinacho mopepuka , m'malo mwake mumalimbikitsana zomwe mumakonda. Ngakhale mutakhala ndi zokonda zosiyana, pamapeto pake, mudzapeza njira zopezera mgwirizano.
9. Zizindikiro za kugwirizana maganizo ndi mnyamata kapena mtsikana -Kuvomerezana wina ndi mzake
Mukakhala paubwenzi wozama kwambiri kapena mwapanga mgwirizano wamphamvu ndi wokondedwa wanu, mumamvetsetsa kuti tonse timabwera ndi zolakwika zathu. Mukaphunzira kuvomerezana mosasamala kanthu za zophophonya ndi zophophonya, m’pamene mumadziŵa kuti mumagwirizana ndi munthuyo.
Simukuyesera kusintha munthu winayo kapena simukufuna kuwapanga kukhala abwino, malinga ndi muyezo wanu. Mukakhala ndi mgwirizano wamphamvu, mumangovomereza munthuyo momwe alili popanda kudandaula za njira zomwe angasinthire kuti zigwirizane ndi zomwe mumakonda komanso zomwe mumakonda.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Zokonda Zofanana Ndi Zofunika Motani Mu Ubale?
10. Kugonana kumabwera kachiwiri ku mgwirizano wamaganizo
Mukakhala ndi ubale wapakati pa maganizo ndi munthu wina, chilakolako kapena kufunitsitsa kugonana kumachepa. Inde, ubale wapamtima kapena wogonana ndi wofunika kwambiri muubwenzi , koma mukamakhala ndi ubale wapamtima, mumalumikizana kwambiri ndi mnzanu. Nthawi zambiri mumakumana ndi nthawi zosagonana muubwenzi wanu. Ngakhale kugwirana manja kapena kukumbatira mnzanu kungakupangitseni kumva kuti muli ndi ubale wapamtima popanda tanthauzo la kugonana.
Zolozera Mfungulo
- Kulumikizana m'malingaliro ndi kuphatikiza kwamalingaliro mwachilengedwe omwe amapanga ubale pakati pa anthu ndikuwabweretsa pafupi
- Kukhala wotetezeka, kudalirana, kulemekezana, ndi kuthandizana ndi mapindu ochepa akukhala ndi chiyanjano ndi wina. Zosowa zanu zam'malingaliro zimakwaniritsidwa, zomwe ndizofunikira kwambiri pamoyo wanu wonse
- Kutha ndi kumasuka kukhala ndi mikangano, kukhala pachiwopsezo wina ndi mnzake, komanso kusasamala mawonekedwe ndi zina mwa zizindikiro zaubwenzi wapamtima.
- Ngati mungathe kugawana malingaliro anu ndi zina zonse za moyo wanu ndi wina ndi mzake, kutenga nawo mbali pazokonda za wina ndi mzake ndikuvomerezana wina ndi mzake ndi zolakwa zanu zonse ndi zofooka zanu, dziwani kuti mumagawana mgwirizano wamphamvu ndi wina ndi mzake.
Izi ndi zizindikiro zochepa za ubwenzi wapamtima kuti zikuthandizeni kumvetsa bwino mfundoyi. Kupanga ubale wapamtima ndi munthu kumafuna nthawi, khama, ndi kuleza mtima. Koma ndiye kumverera kopindulitsa kwambiri chifukwa mukudziwa kuti pali winawake yemwe mungakhale naye komanso yemwe mungamudalire nthawi zonse kuti akuthandizeni.
Ibibazo
Ngati mukufuna kukhala ndi ubale wapamtima ndi mwamuna wanu kapena ngati mukuwona kuti simukugwirizana ndi mkazi wanu, musadandaule! Nthawi zonse mutha kuyesa kupanga kulumikizana kwina poyesa njira zingapo. Tuluka mu chipolopolo chimenecho! Yesetsani kufotokoza zakukhosi kwanu ndi mnzanuyo.
Kumbali ina, inunso muyenera kumvetsera mwatcheru, osati kungomva chabe. Chofunika kwambiri, musayese kuzikonza kapena kuzisintha. Kupatula nthawi yabwino pamodzi kungakuthandizeninso kuti mukhale ndi chiyanjano chakuya mwachibadwa.
Inde. Ngati mukuona kuti n'zovuta kumanga kugwirizana maganizo ndi mnyamata, ndiye inu mukulakwitsa. Ndi lingaliro lolakwika lalikulu kuti anyamata amanyansidwa ndi kulumikizana. Munthu aliyense amafunikira kumva kuti ali wolumikizidwa ndi munthu wina. Munthu aliyense amafunikira zosoŵa zake zamaganizo.
Lingaliro lakuti amuna amangokonda kugonana ndipo alibe chikhumbo chofuna kugwirizanitsa maganizo, zapatsirana kwa mibadwo yambiri zomwe zimapangitsa kumvetsetsa koopsa kwa malingaliro a amuna. Munthu aliyense amafuna kugwirizana ndi munthu wina. Anyamata amakonda kukambirana mozama ndikumverera kuti amasamalidwa mofanana ndi akazi. Mofanana ndi munthu aliyense, amuna sali osiyana.
Palibe kutanthauzira kwakukulu kwa tanthauzo la kulumikizana kwamalingaliro, mumangodziwa mukalumikizana ndi munthu wina. Kulumikizana m'malingaliro kumadutsa gawo la kukopa kwakuthupi chifukwa mumamudziwa bwino munthuyo momwe alili. Pakhoza kukhala njira zambiri zodziwira kuti mumagwirizanitsa maganizo ndi munthu. Koma, chofunika kwambiri, ndi nzeru zanu zomwe zimakuuzani nthawi komanso ngati muli okhudzana ndi wina.
Emotional Intelligence Mu Ubale: Pangani Chikondi Chikhale Kwamuyaya
Kulumikizana Kwamawiri a Flame - Tanthauzo, Zizindikiro Ndi Magawo
Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
