Kutheni intombi yam indizonda?

Mna noJuhi sine 6 years sikunye. Noko ke, besixambulisana mihla le. Sixoxa ngezinto ezincinci ezifana nokukhethwa kokutya okanye malunga noko kufuneka sikubukele kwi-tv. Kwaye ngamanye amaxesha siye sixambulisane ngezinto ezinkulu ezinje ngokuba ancede abahlobo bakhe kunye nosapho lwakhe ngemali nangona sobabini sigcina imali yobomi kunye namaphupha ethu. Nangona sithandana, ngamanye amaxesha ndiziva ngathi kukho umgama okhulayo ngokweemvakalelo phakathi kwethu sobabini. Ngamanye amaxesha, xa sixabana, kuba ngathi ufuna ukundikhathaza. Uthi uzondiphoxa kwizinto aziyo ukuba ndiziva ndinovelwano. Ezi ngxabano zichaphazela amanqanaba ethu okuthandana kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ndiye ndive ngathi asithembani. Ndingenza njani ukuze intombi yam iphinde indithande? Ndifuna nje izinto zibe ngendlela ebeziyiyo ngaphambili. Iimpikiswano azipheleli nje ekubeni lunxunguphalo lweemvakalelo kuthi sobabini, ngoku ziphalala kusapho lwethu nakubantu esibathandayo. Ndingenza ntoni?

impendulo

Iingxabano rhoqo okanye rhoqo kubudlelwane chip kude kuqhagamshelo kunye nokhuseleko amaqabane adibana nawo. Ayigcini nje ngokudibanisa uxinzelelo lwakho, kodwa yandisa amava e ukukhupha iimvakalelo njengokuphoxeka, umsindo, usizi, njl. Ngokwemvelo, oku kunqongophala kokhuseleko, uxhulumaniso kunye neemvakalelo ezintle ekwabelwana ngazo kukhokelela kumgama kubudlelwane.

Nazi izinto ezimbalwa ekufuneka uzikhumbule malunga nongquzulwano:

1. Amaqabane ahlala ebambeke ekuboniseni okulungileyo kunye nokunye okungalunganga. Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba akukho mava ayinyaniso ngokufanelekileyo apha. Ngelixa wena kunye neqabane lakho ninokuba nifumene isiganeko esifanayo, amava akho kunye nokuqonda kweso siganeko kuya kuba yinto eyodwa, kwaye inokuchasana kakhulu. Phinda-phinda kuwe: izinto ezimbini zinokuba yinyani ngexesha elinye.
2. Uninzi lwezi mpikiswano zinokubonakala ngathi zenzeka kwizinto ezincinci, ezingenanjongo. Xa ivakalelwa kukuba impendulo kwimeko enikiweyo kukugqithisela, kukhuselekile ukucinga ukuba eyona ngxaki ayisiyiyo into ebonakala phezu komhlaba. Isibini esixambulisanayo ngendlela echanekileyo yokupheka irayisi ayithethi ngokwenene malunga nerayisi, kodwa imvakalelo yokuba omabini amava omnye ayiqinisekisi amava abo. Phawula unobangela wengxaki. Imalunga nantoni ngokwenene le ngxabano?
3. Amaqabane ahlala egcina amanqaku emilo “ayiphumeleleyo”, apho elinye iqabane lingqineke lilungile, ngelixa elinye lixolisa. Ukuba ufuna ubudlelwane obunempilo, obunothando, yiphose le bhodi yamanqaku ngefestile. Yintoni eyona nto ibalulekileyo - ubudlelwane bakho okanye ukuba lungile?
4. Qaphela iipateni kungquzulwano lwakho. Ngokuqhelekileyo, iqabane lakho liya kwenza into ekubangela ngokwenene, kwaye ngokuphambene. Nje ukuba uqalise ukuzibona, zilandele umva kwimvelaphi yazo. Amathuba kukuba, ubonisa indlela owawuziva ngayo ngelo xesha kwimeko yangoku. Kuyanceda ukubuza, "Yintoni ngeqabane lam elindenza ndiphendule ngolu hlobo?"

UkuFunda okuFanayo: Kutheni ndisoloko ndicinga ukuba intombi yam iyandiqhatha?

Iingcebiso ezimbalwa ngokubanzi ezinokunceda:

1. Kufuneka ulungelelanise intsebenziswano engalunganga kunye neqabane lakho kunye nezakhayo. Yenzani umgudu wokuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni kunye.
2. Ziqhelanise nokuthatha ixesha kwiincoko ezicaphukisayo, kodwa khumbula ukuthembisa ukubuyela ekuxoxeni ngesihloko xa uphole. Qinisekisa ukuba iqabane lakho aliziva lilahliwe phakathi kongquzulwano.
3. Khumbula ukuba nguwe nobabini vs ingxaki hayi wena vs iqabane lakho.
4. Musa ukudelela okanye ukugxeka iqabane lakho phambi kwabanye. Amaqhinga anjalo okuthotywa anokukubetha i-ego yakho okwangoku, kodwa ayingozi kulwalamano lwakho. Khawucinge nje indlela oziva ubuhlungu ngayo kwaye ungcatshwe kangakanani ukwazi umntu omthandayo othetha kakubi ngawe.
5. Ukugxekwa kudla ngokuba ngumnqweno ofihlakeleyo. Siyazigxeka izinto xa sinqwenela ukuba zahlukile. Qaphela umnqweno ozama ukuwudlulisela, tshintsha amagama akho ngokufanelekileyo, kwaye uthethe oko. Kwenza umahluko wehlabathi.

FAQs

Intombi yam ephumayo iyayicaphukela imiqathango kwaye ndiziva ndingakhuselekanga.

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Umnikelo wakho awuquki isisa umnikelo. Iya kuvumela i-Bonobology ukuba iqhubeke nokukuzisela ulwazi olutsha nolwangoku kwiphulo lethu lokunceda nabani na osehlabathini ukuba afunde ukwenza nantoni na.

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