Kwimuvi Black Panther, uChadwick Boseman (T'Challa) kunye noLetitia Wright (Shuri) bakwilabhu yakhe xa ekhwaza, 'Kutheni ukhupha iinzwane zakho kwilebhu yam?!" UBoseman ujonge phantsi kwiinyawo zakhe ezinxibe iimbadada aze athi, “Bendicinga ukuba ndingaya kwisikolo sabadala kusuku lwam lokuqala” “Ndibethele ukuba abadala bayayithanda loo nto!” uyaphendula.
Umboniso kunye nengxoxo phakathi kwabantakwabo kulula, ukufudumala kunye nokudlala, kunye nomzekelo omhle ukuba uyazibuza 'yintoni i-banter.' Ngoku, i-banter ngokusisiseko lutshintshiselwano olulula phakathi kwabantu abasele besazi kakuhle, okanye banokuba ngumqhekezi omkhulu womkhenkce phakathi kwabantu abangabaziyo.
Ukudlala i-banter ayisiyonto yothando okanye ngokwesondo ngokwendalo, kodwa inokuba sesinye sezixhobo zakho zokuncwasa ukuba yindlela oyidlala ngayo. Ngaba ukubhanxwa kukuncwasa, siyakuva ubuza. Eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokuyibeka kukuba i-banter yenye yeendlela zokuncwasa ngempumelelo. I-Witty banter, idityaniswe nolwimi lomzimba kunye nokudibana kwamehlo, inokuba yile nto uyidingayo ukuze utsale loo cutie ubuyijongile okwethutyana.
Ke, ukuba uyazibuza ukuba uthetha ukuthini i-banter, indlela yokuncokola nentombazana okanye indlela yokubhakra nomfana, sikwenzele umsebenzi othile saza sahlanganisa i-ins kunye nokuphuma kwe-banter kunye neminye imizekelo yokuhlekisa ukwenza kube lula kuwe.
Lithetha ukuthini iBanter
Isiqulatho
I-Banter kukunxibelelana namazwi ahlekisayo, ahlekisayo. Isenokuba phakathi kweqela labahlobo, abantu ababini ngomhla (nokuba a umhla wenyani), umthengi kunye noweyitara, okanye nomntu osandul’ ukudibana naye.
I-Banter ayifuni ukuba yincoko enzulu; enyanisweni, undoqo wayo ukuba incoko ilula kwaye incoko inokuba okanye hayi ukuba flirtatious, ngokuxhomekeke kwimeko. I-Banter ayifuni kuba neenjongo zokuphela – inokuba yincoko emfutshane ephela kuwo onke amaqela eziva onwabile kwaye onwabile.
Khawufane ucinge, umzekelo, usepatini kwaye uncokola nomntu osela utywala. Unomdla wokwazi ngakumbi. Mhlawumbi incoko ihamba ngolu hlobo:
Wena: Uyazi, ndingumntu obhala imiyalezo ekumgangatho wehlabathi. I mean, ibhalwe as a skill kwi CV yam. Ukuba bendinayo inombolo yakho, ubunokuzibonela.
Bona: Ke, ngamanye amazwi, oobhontsi bakho lolona phawu ulungileyo?
Le yindlela ecocekileyo nevulekileyo yokucela iinkcukacha zabo zoqhagamshelwano, kwaye ubazise ukuba ukulungele. imiyalezo emnandi. Ibavulela ithuba lokuba bathi ewe okanye hayi ngaphandle kokuziva bevalelwe. Into enkulu malunga ne-banter kukuba ngenxa yokukhanya kwayo ngokwemvelo, indalo elula, akukho mvakalelo yomntu yonzakala ngolo hlobo.
Ngaba iBanter ilungile kubudlelwane?
Uphononongo lubanga ukuba i-banter ilungile kubudlelwane obusondeleyo kuba yenza indawo yokuhleka, incoko kunye nokuqhula okunempilo. Umzekelo, mhlawumbi iqabane lakho kwaye ubuyile kwisidlo sangokuhlwa esikruqulayo soshishino kunye noogxa bakhe.
Wena: Abo bafo baxinene kakhulu.
Him: guys Stuffy benza abayeni best!
Wena: Ngokwenene? Kufuneka ndikhangele enye ke!
Yincoko ethe ngqo, kodwa iyakuba nani nobabini nigigitheke njengabakwishumi elivisayo ninokwenu kwaye nincokole ngokuhlekisayo. Bekuya kuba lula kuye ukuba akhubeke kuba ubiza oogxa bakhe ukuba bathe phithi. Kodwa, endaweni yokuba ukhubeke kwaye ukhethe ukulwa, nobabini niyenze yalula, yalula, kwaye idlala ixesha.
Ukuhleka kuhle kakhulu naluphi na uhlobo lobudlelwane. Ithomalalisa ukruthakruthwano kwaye izisa imvakalelo yobudlelwane kunye nobunye. Kwaye xa bantering njengoko alinganayo, yakho ubudlelwane amandla dynamics anikhohlakali – ningabantu abathandanayo ababini, abahlekayo omnye komnye endaweni yokuxabana.
Ngokudlala, ukudlala ngothando kunokuba kufutshane nekona. Kwaye kwincwadi yethu, ukudlala ngothando kulungile kwimicimbi yothando emitsha nendala. Ibeka intwasahlobo kwinqanaba lakho kwaye ikwenza uzive uthandwa. Ukuba i-banter ikubeka kwindlela yakho yokudlala ngothando kunye neemvakalelo ezinomtsalane, yintoni enokuba ngcono!
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Njengazo zonke izifundo ezinzulu, kukho ithiyori kwaye kukho ukusetyenziswa. Ukuba ubufunda 'Banter for Dummies' (hayi, asiyonyani, siyenzile) kwaye uziqhelanisa nokubetha kwakho phambi kwesipili, kulungile, kulungile kuwe. Kodwa kuthekani xa ngokwenene uzifumana ukwimeko ephazamisayo? Ngaba ukhe ube ngumkhenkce njengexhama elibanjwe kwizibane zentloko, okanye wenza intshukumo yakho nge-swag eyongezelelweyo?
Ungakhathazeki, sinomqolo wakho. Siqokelele iindlela onokuthi usebenzise ngazo i-banter kubomi bakho bokwenyani, ngethemba ngaphandle kokuba neentloni okanye uthethe into eya kukukhathaza iminyaka xa thetha nesithandwa sakho okanye banter iqabane.
1. Yiba ngumnikazi wemigca yakho yokuvula
Uyalazi laa ntetha yakudala ethi 'uqalwe kakuhle sele ugqitywe?' Ewe, nokuba kukubhuda okuhlekisayo okanye ukudlala, oko kuyasebenza kuwe. Ukuba uqala ngamandla, umsebenzi wakho omhle uyenziwa. Nazi ezinye izinto onokuthi uqale ngazo ukuba uyazibuza ukuba ungabhakraza njani nomfana, okanye ubhuqa njani nentombazana.
'Ndifuna ukwenza ingxaki, kunjani kuwe?'
Ukuba ungayisusa le nto ngendlela enomtsalane, engoyikiyo, inika umbono wokuba ungumntu owonwabisayo olwela nantoni na. Oku kuya kusebenza kwindibano yentlalo apho usandula kudibana neqabane lakho le-banter kwaye mhlawumbi nitshintshiselane ngezinto ezimnandi. Ungayilandela ngokubhengeza umdlalo okanye u-odole umjikelo wokudutyulwa kuye wonke umntu.
'Akuthandi na izilwanyana ngaphezu kwabantu!'
Ii-introverts ezithandekayo kunye nabathandi bezilwanyana zasekhaya, le yeyakho. Siyazi ukuba kumatheko amaninzi, uyakonwabela ukuhlala ekoneni, ukrwaqula abantu, mhlawumbi udlale nenja yomninimzi. Kodwa ama-introverts amaninzi ane-knack emangalisayo ye-banter. Kwaye ukuba ufumene umntu ohlekisayo kunye nomhlali wekona, ke, ngubani owaziyo ukuba kwenzeka ntoni.
'Yintoni umfana/intombazana/umntu omhle njengawe owenzayo kwindawo yokulahla inkunkuma enje'
Iqabane lam lisebenzisa oku kum ngalo lonke ixesha sikwindawo yokutyela yodidi okanye kwikhaya elitofotofo. Kodwa unokuyisebenzisa ngokupheleleyo ukuqalisa incoko nomntu ongamaziyo nawe. Oku kukuphawula okungalunganga kwindawo okungqongileyo, kwaye kubonisa uburharha bakho ngaphandle kokunikela kakhulu.
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2. Lumkela ulwimi lwakho lomzimba
Ngoku, siyazi ukuba besithe i-banter imalunga nencoko, kodwa masijongane nayo, ukuba usacinga malunga nokuba yintoni imizekelo ye-banter kunye ne-banter, ulwimi lomzimba luya kwenza ukubonakala apho kwindawo ethile.
Oku ikakhulu kwiimeko apho wena kunye neqabane lakho banter nibatsha omnye komnye, xa usazibuza 'ibantering flirting?' Impawu zomzimba ngamanye amaxesha inokuba sisigqibo phakathi kokudlala nokudlala ngothando.
UKathleen uthi: “Ndiyakuthanda ukuncokola kakuhle, kwanokuba oko akuthethi ukuba udlala ngothando. “Kodwa kukho umgca ocacileyo phakathi kokungquzulana nokuwela imida, kwaye ndiyayazi loo nto nokuba ndikwindawo yokupha okanye ndifumana isiphelo sokuthetha ngobukrelekrele.
“Ndakhe ndakwibhari neqela labantu, yaye omnye wayengumfana endandingamazi.” Wayesoloko esithi “Ungumntu onomdla ngokwenene” yaye sasiqhubeka sisenza amabali ahlekisayo ngabantu abakwitafile elandelayo. Kwakumnandi, kodwa waqalisa ukungqiyama kakhulu, wandibamba egxalabeni njl.
Xa ufunda ukuba yintoni i-banter, kubalulekile ukuba ufunde ukuba yintoni i-banter engeyiyo. Kwaye ukuthuka, ukudlala ngothando njlnjl. kufuna izixa ezinempilo zentlonipho kunye nemvume. Lumkela ulwimi lwakho lomzimba kunye nolomnye umntu kwaye ungagqithisi.
3. Musa ukuba buhlungu
Kwakhona, esi sesinye isifundo kwimida yobudlelwane. Ngenxa yokuba uninzi lwempendulo kumbuzo othi 'yintoni i-banter' ibandakanya ukuzonwabisa kunye nokuqhula, kulula ukucinga ukuba lixesha elivulekileyo kwiqabane lakho, kwaye akufanele ukhathazeke malunga nento oyithethayo. Kunene?
Ayilunganga. Kukho umahluko phakathi kokulungileyo, okumnandi, ukuncokola okuhlekisayo kunye nokubeka umntu phantsi. Umzekelo, ukuba iqabane lakho elingxolayo ligqwetha kwaye uthi, "Ke, ingaba nantoni na endiyithethayo iya kusetyenziswa ngokuchasene nam enkundleni?" kukubhuqa. Ukuba uthi, “Gee, njengawo onke amagqwetha, ndibheja ukuba ulixoki elilungileyo,” ulixoki. ukuthetha izinto ezenzakalisayo kwaye kuya kuvakala ngathi wenza isigwebo ngokukhawuleza nokuba awuzimiselanga.
Esi sisifundo esibaluleke kakhulu ukuba iqabane lakho banter kwaye awazi omnye komnye kakuhle kakhulu. Kodwa musa ukucinga ukuba ukuba bantering nomhlobo ixesha elide okanye iqabane romantic, kukhuselekile ukuthetha nantoni na oyifunayo.
“Mna nomfazi wam sineqhula elide malunga nebhayisekile yokuzilolonga endayithengayo ndaze ndaphantse ndayisebenzisa.” Le bhayisekile sayithiya igama elithi 'Neverland' kuba andizange ndiye apho yaye wayedla ngokubuza, 'Hee Pete, kuthekani ngohambo oluya eNeverland?' yaye ndandidla ngokuphendula ndithi, ‘Ayize yenzeke loo nto,’ utsho uPeter.
Kodwa emva koko, umfazi wakhe, uKaty, waqalisa ukuthetha amazwi anjengala, “Uyazi, eNeverland kulapho abantu bangakhuli khona. Kwasuka kwisiqhulo esifudumeleyo, sangaphakathi ukuya kutsho kuburharha kwaze kwakhokelela kwingqumbo enkulu phakathi kwesi sibini.
4. Yazi ixesha lokuyeka
Oku akuthethi nje ukuyeka xa ufumanisa ukuba wenza buhlungu okanye ukuba uye wagqitha. Kwakhona malunga nokwazi ukuba kukho into eninzi kakhulu kwaye iqabane lakho banter lifuna indawo kunye nexesha lokuphendula ngamanye amaxesha.
Ukuba ucinga ngokwenene malunga nokuba yintoni i-banter, khumbula ukuba akusiyo uchungechunge olungapheliyo lwemigca ye-cheesy kunye namahlaya. Cinga ukuba, izinto ezibuhlungu kubudlelwane ingasebenza ngamanye amaxesha, kodwa eyona mizekelo ilungileyo iya kukubonisa ukuba imalunga nokuthatha inyathelo emva ngelixa usahamba.
Umzekelo, masithi ubulisa umntu ngokuthi 'nanku kuza ingxaki' xa bengena egumbini, kuyahlekisa okokuqala. Kodwa ukuba uhlala kuyo ixesha elide kakhulu, uye 'Kulungile, ukuba ayingoNkosazana Troublemaker kwakhona' ngokuphindaphindiweyo, iya kucaphukisa nokuba umntu ochaphazelekayo ngumhlobo.
Kwakhona, qaphela impendulo oyifumanayo kwi-banter yakho. Ukuba uzama ukuncokola ne-barista kwivenkile yakho yekofu oyithandayo ngokuthi 'Ukhangeleka ngathi uzele ziimbotyi!', kodwa bajonge bengakhange bajonge, okanye bancume ngembeko bajonge kude, yazi ukuba lixesha lokuyeka. Ngokufanayo, ukuba uzama ukwenza i-banter headway nomntu kwindibano yentlalo okanye kwimeko yomsebenzi kwaye uvuzwe ngokujonga okubandayo, betha ukuhlehla ngokukhawuleza. Khumbula, imvume ngundoqo, nokuba zikhaphukhaphu kangakanani na izinto.
5. Phakamisa umdlalo wakho wombhalo
Asinakukwazi ukushiya ngaphandle kowona mba ubalulekileyo wokubhabhisa okubhaliweyo! Ukuthumela imiyalezo yinxalenye enkulu yonxibelelwano lwethu lwentlalo (okanye ye-asocial!), kwaye ungangena kwi-banter enkulu, edlalwayo ngemiyalezo ebhaliweyo.
Ngoku, lo inokuba ngumntu osele udibene naye emntwini amaxesha ambalwa, okanye umntu odibene naye kwi ukuthandana app, okanye umhlobo wakho wexesha elide okanye iqabane. Eyona nto ilungileyo malunga ne-banter kukuba ungazibandakanya nayo nabani na.
Ukuba lo ngumntu osele uzibandakanye naye kwi-banter yexabiso eliphezulu, okt banter kunye notyalo-mali oluqinisekileyo lweemvakalelo okanye uthando okanye injongo engqondweni, unganakho ukufumana ukukhalipha okuncinci kunye nokudlala ngothando kwisicatshulwa. Masijongane nayo, sonke asithinteleki kancinci kumbhalo.
Into ekwimigca ethi, 'Yintoni le undenza yona ngokuthumela umyalezo emva kwexesha kangaka' nge-emoji efanelekileyo inokuba ngumzekelo omhle we-banter ngaphezulu kokubhaliweyo. Mhlawumbi baphendula ngokuthi 'Ke, uza kwenza ntoni ngaloo nto?' ukufumana ibhola ye-banter.
Ungawajongeli phantsi amandla eziphumlisi kunye ne-emojis kwi-banter. Inqaku lesikhuzo elithobekileyo libonisa uchulumanco kwaye libonisa ukuba uyakuvuyela ukuthetha nabo. Kwaye kunjalo, i-emojis kunye ne-gifs zinendawo yazo ekhethekileyo kwihlabathi lokuthumela imiyalezo.
Ukubhalelana ngemiyalezo kukwayindlela ekhuselekileyo ukuba i-banter ayizi kuwe ngokwemvelo kwaye yindlela yokubaleka imeko ukuba awukho ngokwenene kuloo mntu uxabana naye. Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, izithupha zakho zinokuba ngabahlobo bakho ababalaseleyo kwihlabathi lokubetha.
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Xa i-Banter ijika iyingozi
Ngokuthetha okuninzi malunga nokuba yintoni i-banter, kukwabalulekile ukujonga icala layo elisezantsi. I-Banter inokuba buhlungu okanye ibe yingozi ukuba amaqela omabini akakho kwiphepha elinye. Oko kukuthi, ukuba umntu uyayonwabela i-banter, kodwa omnye akayenzi, akukho nto ilinganayo kwaye akukho mntu uya kuyonwabela.
I-Banter emsebenzini inokujika ibe mnyama kuba imida kunye nemibuzo yokuba yintoni efanelekileyo yahlukile. Into ebonakala ikhaphukhaphu okanye intlekisa komnye umntu isenokungafanelekanga komnye umntu.
Kwakhona, 'ukuhlambalaza' kunokusetyenziswa kakubi ukwenza umntu azive emncinci okanye ahlazeke ngenxa yenkangeleko yakhe okanye into ayiyo. Khumbula, ukuthetha amazwi angenabubele ngenkangeleko yomnye umntu, ifashoni, ingcamango, njl.njl. akuthethi ukuthuka.
I-Banter, ekugqibeleni, ithatha into entle yokuba sesichengeni kunye nokuvuleleka. Nokuba awulindelanga iziphumo zothando okanye ezesondo, uthatha inyathelo kwaye uzibeke phaya. Umngcipheko we ejongene nokulahlwa, okanye ukungabikho kwempendulo, kuhlala kukho, kwaye awukwazi ukuyiphepha loo nto.
Kweyona ndlela ilungileyo nesulungekileyo nangona kunjalo, i-banter lisango elonwabisayo lencoko enentsingiselo kunye nobudlelwane, ezaliswe lula kunye nokuhleka. Ke, ukuba ujonge ukuboleka ukukhanya kwigumbi, kwincoko, okanye nakubomi bakho, ungajongi ngaphaya kwe-banter elungileyo.
FAQs
I-Banter ngokuqinisekileyo inokuba lisango lokudlala ngothando kuba imalunga nolonwabo, incoko elula. Yiza nomgca wokuvula olungileyo, unganikezeli amandla akhwankqisayo, kwaye wazi ixesha lokuyeka. Kukwabalulekile ukulinganisa ulwimi lomzimba womnye umntu kunye neempendulo ukuqinisekisa ukuba awugqithisi nakuphi na. imida.
Ixabiso eliphezulu banter kuxa bantering notyalo-mali oluqinisekileyo uthando okanye ngokweemvakalelo kunye/okanye iinjongo. Ngoko ke, ukuba uye wabetha up incoko nomntu ukuthandana app, okanye nomntu sele une chemistry yothando, uyazi ukuba unomdla kwenye, okanye ufuna ukuba, nokuba le banter ayikho nje ngenxa yayo.
Gxila ngokuthanda kwakho umbhalo ngokuthumela i-emojis ezintle okanye ii-gifs. Dlala nabo ngokubaxelela ukuba ubone intshontsho lekati elinomsindo kwaye likukhumbuza ngabo. Benze bahleke kunye corny jokes okanye dlala nge memes.
Ukubetha ngoyaba itekisi yindlela entle yokuqalisa incoko, okanye ukuqhubeka nenye osele unayo ubuso ngobuso. Sebenzisa iziphumlisi zakho ekunene (amanqaku ambalwa esikhuzo akanakuze enze buhlungu!) kwaye ube nesisa nge-emojis yakho. Uninzi lwazo zonke, khumbula ukuqiniseka ukuba kuyonwabisa kwaye kumnandi kuni nobabini.
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