Ukuba ubukwisiphelo sokufumana ukungathembeki, uya kuba uqhelene kakhulu ne-punch-out punch emathunjini isityhilelo sokukopela sinokuziva ngathi. Ngelixa impembelelo eyothusayo yokuqala yeqabane elingcatsha ithemba lakho libhalwe kakuhle, kukwafanelekile ukuba ucinge ngendlela ukuqhathwa ngayo utshintsho lwakho.
Akukho siganeko sokukopela kulula ukudlula. Enyanisweni, kunokusongela ikamva lobudlelwane bakho. Kubantu abaninzi, ukufunyanwa kubuhlungu kakhulu ukuba kudlule, kubangela ukuba baphelise ubudlelwane kwaye baqhubele phambili. Kwiimeko ezininzi, izibini ziyazama ukuhlala kunye kwaye zixolelane emva kokungathembeki.
Kuzo zombini ezi meko, impembelelo yokuqhathwa ivakala ngokunzulu. Ukuba ugqiba kwelokuba uluqhawule olo lwalamano, usenokujamelana nobulolo emva kokuba uqhathiwe. Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuhlala kunye, isiganeko sijonge kwintsebenziswano yakho yothando njengeSword of Damocles, isoyikisa ngokuqhawula ubudlelwane bakho ngeyona ndlela iphosakeleyo.
Iziphumo zexesha elide zokuqhathwa zihlala zintsonkothile kwaye kunzima ukuqhubekeka kunomothuko wokuqala, intlungu kunye nomsindo. Yiyo loo nto kuya kufuneka ngakumbi ukuqonda ukuba ukuqhathwa kukutshintsha njani. Masizame ukuqonda iimvakalelo emva kokuqhathwa.
Ngaba Ukuqhathwa Kungakutshintsha?
Isiqulatho
Ukungathembeki kubudlelwane ibonwa njengolona hlobo lukhulu lokungcatsha kubudlelwane obuzibophelele, nobuqabane omnye. Kubonwa njengesenzo esinye esinokuphelisa zonke izithembiso zobudlelwane obubanjwe kumaqabane omabini. Kodwa nangakumbi kulowo uqhathiweyo. Ixesha elide, umfanekiso odibeneyo weqabane lakho ebhedini kunye nomnye umntu ushicilelwe engqondweni yakho.
Awunakuyeka ukuyidlala kwakhona kwaye uyiphindaphinda. Njengoko injalo indlela yengqondo yomntu, lo mfanekiso - ongumzekelo wentelekelelo yakho - unokuba ngumzobo ngakumbi kunoko wehla kubomi benene. Ngokuhamba kwexesha, lo mfanekiso unokuqalisa ukuphela kodwa iziphumo zexesha elide zokuqhathwa zisenokuhlala.
Usenokuba uyazibuza, "Ngaba ukuqhathwa ekutshintsheni?" Osincedisayo ekujongeni iimpendulo, yingcali yengqondo kunye nomlawuli kwi-SAATH: iZiko loThintelo lokuzibulala, Nishim Marshall, othi: “Usenokuba uphila ubomi obanelisayo, unombulelo ngeqabane lakho, ulwalamano lwenu nendlela izinto eziye zakuhambela kakuhle ngayo.” Kwimeko enjalo, ukufumanisa ukuba uye waqhathwa kunokukothusa.
“Okokuqala, kukuqhekeza ube ngamaqhekezana ngemibuzo engapheliyo ngesiqu sakho, ukuzixabisa kwakho, ukuzithemba kwakho, ukuzithanda nokuzithemba.
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Kutheni uqhathwa kukutshintsha kwakho?
Isizathu sokuba ukuqhathwa kubuhlungu kwaye kukutshintshe kukuba abantu abaninzi babopha isenzo sokukhohlisa kunye nokuzithemba kwabo. Ngaba bendingalungelanga ngokwaneleyo? Bendiswele phi? Yintoni omnye umntu anayo le ndiyisweleyo? Imibuzo efana nale idla ngokuba yingcinga yomntu oqhathiweyo.
Ngokufanayo, xa uzama ukuhlola isizathu ukukopela kubudlelwane, ugxininisa kwizinto ezifana nokungonwabi, ubomi besondo obunganelisekiyo, imiba kwintsebenziswano kunye nokunye. Le yindlela abantu abaninzi abaye baqhathwa ngayo ukwenza oku malunga nabo. Ngokuqonda okanye ngokungazi.
Noko ke, ukukopela phantse kusoloko kusisiphumo sobuntu bomkhohlisi kwaye kusenokungabi nanto yakwenza neqabane labo okanye ubudlelwane. Isenokuba sisiphumo sohambo lukabani kunye neempembelelo zakwangoko ezifana nokungqina ukukopela kubudlelwane bomzali wabo okanye ukukhulela kwikhaya elingasebenziyo. Isenokuba yindlela yokuzifihla, ukubaleka okanye ukumelana nayo.
Ukuvuma oku kunye nokuzahlula kwinto, kutheni kwaye njani ukukopela kuphela kwendlela yokugatya iziphumo zokungcatsha kwingqondo.
Iindlela ezili-11 zokuqhathwa ziTshintsha
Emva kokukopela, injongo kufuneka ibe kukugxila kwisizathu sokuba kwenzeke isikreqo kunokuba kwenzeke ntoni phakathi kweqabane lakho kunye nomnye umntu ebomini babo. Nokuba ufuna ukuqhubela phambili emva kokuba uqhathiwe okanye uhlale kunye kwaye wenze ubudlelwane busebenze, le kuphela kwendlela yokuphilisa ngokwenene ekukopeleni.
Noko ke, izibini ezininzi azikufanelanga ukufikelela olu sukelo. Ubuncinci bebodwa, kwaye ngaphandle koncedo kunye nesikhokelo somcebisi okanye umnyangi. Ngenxa yoko, iziphumo zexesha elide zokuqhathwa ziqala ukubamba.
Iyintoni le miphumo yexesha elide? Kwaye ukuqhathwa kukutshintsha njani? U-Nishim wabelana ngezi mpembelelo zili-11 zokungathembeki kunye nokungcatshwa onokuthi ube nakho ukuba uqhathiwe:
1. Uphuhlisa imiba yokuthembana
Uthi: “Yonke into obuyithembile iqabane lakho ithi shwaka ngephanyazo. Ngenxa yoko, unokuhlakulela ubunzulu imiba yokuthembela oko kudlulela ngaphaya kobudlelwane.
UMira, owaqhathwa liqabane ekudala lisebenza naye, wazibonela ngokwakhe oku. “Ndabuya kwinkomfa ngaphambi kwexesha elicwangcisiweyo ndaza ndagoduka ndinemincili ukuze ndothuse iqabane lam, kodwa ndamfumana elele ebhedini nebhinqa elalisebenza naye. Utsho enegaqa apha emqaleni.
“Ndiyazi ukuba yenye yezona ndlela zibalaseleyo zokufumanisa ukuba iqabane lakho belidlala ngawe, kodwa kwaba njalo.” Nangona ndaluphelisa olo lwalamano ngoko nangoko, andiqondi ukuba ndaphinda ndachacha kuloo ngxaki.
UMira ngoku utshatile kodwa inxalenye yobunzima bakhe bokuthemba umyeni wakhe. Ndichwechwela ndajonga ifowuni yakhe, ndiqinisekisa ukuba uphi, kuba andinako ukuyisusa imvakalelo yokuba naye uzongcatsha ithemba lam.
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2. Uzithelekisa nalo MNYE umntu
“Enye into exhaphakileyo yokuqhathwa kukuqhathwa kukuzithelekisa nomnye umntu.” Amadoda aye aqhathwa amava njengoko esenza kanye njengokuba esenza abafazi.
Ke, uzifumana uchwechwela enye indoda okanye ibhinqa kumajelo eendaba ezentlalo okanye wenze uluhlu lwengqondo lokuba bangcono njani kunawe okanye ngokuchaseneyo. Leyo yindlela ekutshintsha ngayo ukuqhathwa – kuyayityumza indlela oziva ngayo,” utshilo uNishim.
Logama nje uphila nale mvakalelo yophukileyo yokuzixabisa kunye nokuzixabisa, awukwazi ukuzibamba kubudlelwane bakho obukhoyo okanye wenze ubambiswano olusempilweni kwixesha elizayo.
3. Umnqweno wokuziphindezela
Enye indlela ebalulekileyo yokuba ukuqhathwa ekutshintsheni kukufakela kuwe umnqweno wokuziphindezela kwiqabane lakho. “Ufuna ukubonisa iqabane lakho ukuba nawe unakho ngokwaneleyo ukuba nemicimbi, iintambo okanye ubusuku obunye ngaphandle kobudlelwane,” utshilo uNishim.
Oku kuphakathi kweyona ndlela iphezulu yokusabela ukuba ukuqhathwa kuyichaphazela njani indoda. Inokwenzeka nakubantu abasoloko bekuxabisa ngokunzulu ukunyaniseka kubudlelwane; abo abazange baphinde banike omnye umntu ukujonga okwesibini, ngenxa yokuba babenobudlelwane obuzinikeleyo. Ukophulwa kwentembeko kunokukuhlisa kwindlela yokuziphatha okubi, ukuba ubonisa omnye umntu phezulu.
Oku kusabela ngamandla kwindlela ukuqhathwa ekutshintsheni ngayo ngonaphakade.
4. Ukuqhathwa kuyakucaphukisa
Abasetyhini kunye namadoda aye aqhathwa nawo anokutshintsha ubuntu. “Ukuba nomsindo, ukucaphuka nokucaphuka zezinye zeziphumo eziqhelekileyo zokungcatshwa kwengqondo.Olu tshintsho luchaphazela ulwalamano lwakho nabantwana bakho (ukuba lukhona), usapho kunye nabahlobo, ngaphandle kokuchaphazela indlela osebenza ngayo emsebenzini.
UNishmin uthi: “Ukuqhathwa kukwenza buhlungu kangangokuba kukuzisela ububi.” Ukuqonda ukuba umntu obumxabisile uye walunyathela uthando nokuthembana enikunye naye kunokuba buhlungu kakhulu.” Noko ke, yinyani leyo,” utsho uNishmin.
Ngaphandle kokuba ufumana indlela yokucwangcisa kunye nokuhambisa ezi mvakalelo zimbi, utshintsho lobuntu olubangelwa sisenzo sokukopela lunokuba lusisigxina.
5. Ulwa neemvakalelo eziyityhefu
UNishim uchaza ezi zinto njengomxube weemvakalelo zokuziva unetyala, umona, ukungazithembi, iintloni kunye nokuphoxeka. Ngelixa umona kunye nokungakhuseleki ziimvakalelo ezihambelana ngakumbi emva kokukopela, uninzi lwamaqabane nawo alwa nokuziva unetyala, iintloni kunye neentloni.
Oku kubonwa ngokuqhelekileyo kwindlela ukuqhathwa okumchaphazela ngayo umfazi, kodwa ukuba nokwenzeka kwamadoda atyhubela iimvakalelo ezifanayo akunakuthintelwa. Ibali likaHenrietta lisibonisa indlela ubutyala obungene ngayo. Uthi, “Umyeni wam waqhatha kodwa ndaziva ndinetyala ngoba bendingenokwazi ukuyisusa le ngcinga yokuba ngumsebenzi wam owadala izikhewu emtshatweni, ndivule indawo yokuba kungene umntu wesithathu.
Ndanyuselwa ndaza kwafuneka ndifudukele kwisixeko esahlukileyo ukuze ndimisele iofisi entsha. Yayiyigig yonyaka omnye, kwaye ndayithatha ndicinga ukuba singayilawula. Kodwa ke, umyeni wam waphela sele ethandana iinyanga ezintandathu kolu tshintsho. Ukuza kuthi ga kulo mhla, inxenye yam ibeka ityala kwisigqibo sam sokwenza owethu umtshato wokude ngenxa yokreqo lwakhe.”
6. Ikwenza ukuba ubuze ubudlelwane bakho bonke
USuzanne wayekhulelwe umntwana wakhe wokuqala xa wabamba umyeni wakhe ethumela i-ex. “Apha ndithwele umntwana wakhe, ndilala engalali ndingonwabanga, umzimba wam utshintshile ngendlela engaziwayo, naye ebefumana indima yakhe kulowo ukhohlakeleyo, eyona nto imbi besilala sobabini yena encokola ne ex yakhe.
"Wafunga ukuba akazange alale naye okanye adibane nomntu wakhe, kwaye waphikisana nokuba yinto nje yokukhupha i-testosterone engenabungozi.kukuqhatha imiyalezo ngefowuni' ulwalathiso.
Uthi: “Asizozenzo zakhe nje kuphela kodwa nendlela awasabela ngayo emva kokuba ebanjwe oqoshoba kwandenza ndazibuza yonke into eyayithethwa kulwalamano lwethu.
Kwimeko kaSuzanna, ukuqhathwa kwaba buhlungu kangangokuba akazange aphinde abujonge ngendlela efanayo ulwalamano lwakhe. Ukusuka apho, izinto zachaneka ngokukhawuleza.
7. Ukuqhathwa kukwenza ugadwe ngakumbi
Kuthatha intliziyo eninzi-kunye nokuthembela komnye umntu-ukuvumela ukulinda kwakho kwaye ubeke ubuthathaka bakho ekuhleni. Indlela ukuqhathwa ekutshintsheni kwakho kukuba ikwenza ugadwe ngakumbi.
Hayi nje kubudlelwane bakho bangoku okanye kwixesha elizayo kodwa njengomntu. Ukuba uyazibuza ukuba ngaba ukuqhathwa kukutshintshe ngonaphakade, le yimeko eqhelekileyo. Njengomntu oye wasinda ekunganyaniseki, usenokungaze ukwazi ukwabelana ngokunzulu nokungaqiniseki, uloyiko, amathemba namaphupha kwakhona, nkqu nabo basondeleyo kuwe.
Oko kuquka abahlobo, usapho, abazali kunye nabantwana. Ukuthembana okuphelileyo kukwenza utshixe iqhekeza lakho ngonaphakade.
8. Inokukubeka ecaleni ubudlelwane
U-Tully, umyili wemveliso ophumeleleyo, uyavuma ukuba ukulumka malunga nobudlelwane obuzinikeleyo yenye yeziphumo ezibi zexesha elide zokuqhathwa. Wayekwiminyaka yakhe yama-20 xa isithandwa sakhe sasekholejini sangcatsha ukholo lwakhe.
“Elona xesha lide, ndandifungile amadoda, ukutyhubela iminyaka, bendikhe ndaneengcinga, ubusuku obunye kwaye ndazama nokuzama ukuba neentlobano zesini, kodwa andizange ndikwazi ukuphinda ndibotshelelwe komnye umntu kwakhona.
Uthi: “Uloyiko lokuba baya kwenza okufanayo alunakugungqiswa kwaphela.Into engazange iphole kwanamashumi eminyaka yonyango.
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9. Uba lukhuni ngakumbi
UChris, umntu ontsundu, oyindoda ethandana nomntu othandana naye, owaba mdala ngeminyaka yoo-80s, wayesele enobomi obunzima kakhulu. Wayengakwazi ukuphuma aye kwintsapho yakhe okanye kubahlobo bakhe, yaye ubomi obumbaxa babumphazamisa. Wadibana nendoda entle waza wayithanda.
Kwakubonakala ngathi uhambo lwakhe luza kuba lula apha, ngaphandle kokuba iqabane lakhe lalingekho likhulu kwi ingcamango yokuba nomfazi omnye okanye ukuzibophelela. “Ubomi babusele bunzima, yaye ukundiqhatha kwakhe kwafana nesikhonkwane sokugqibela.” Kwandijika ekubeni ndibe ngulo mfo uphoxisayo, nothandabuzayo, owayengakwazi ukuzibamba iimvakalelo zakhe yaye wayengakwazi ukwabelana nabanye ngazo.
"Imali yesilivere yayikukuba olu guqulelo lukhuni lwam lwalulungele ukuthatha nayiphi na enye into endiyilindeleyo. Oko kwaba ngumqolomba wokuphumelela kunye nokuphumelela - nangona unesithukuthezi - ubomi," utsho.
10. Ukukopa kunokukunika isibindi sokuqhubeka
Iingcali zonyango ziyavuma ukuba ukukopa kuluphawu ngaphezu konobangela weengxaki zobudlelwane. Inyaniso yokuba umntu wesithathu unokungena kubudlelwane bakho ikhomba iintanda kunye nezithuba ezikhoyo.
Ngokufuthi, izibini ezitshatileyo zihlala zitshayela imiba yazo phantsi kwekhaphethi de zivuthuze ebusweni bazo. Esi simo sengqondo sinokuba ngunobangela wokungathembeki. Ngokufanayo, amaxesha amaninzi, abantu abatshatileyo bahlala kunye, bezama ukutsala ubudlelwane obude bexesha elide, kuba nje buqhelekile kwaye buthuthuzela.
Kwiimeko ezinjalo, isithukuthezi emva kokuqhathwa kunokuba yinto yokugqibela efunekayo ukuze uqhubeke kwaye ubuyisele ubomi bakho.
11. Inokuzisa entsha
Ewe, ukuqhathwa kuyakutshintsha kodwa akusoloko kusenzeka ngeendlela ezimbi. “Wakuba uqutyulwe ngumsindo, ubuhlungu nentlungu, usenokuqalisa ukuchacha.” Ukuqonda ukuba ungaphezu kweqabane lomnye umntu kunokukunceda ukubuyisela isidima sakho, ukuphelelwa ukuzithemba nokuzihlonela.
"Ngalo kuza ingqiqo yamandla kunye nokholo. Ilizwi lakho langaphakathi, ukuqonda kwakho kuqala ukuthetha nawe. Olu tshintsho luqala ukuxhobisa intliziyo yakho eyaphukileyo kwaye uyomeleze, ngokucothayo kodwa ngokuthe ngcembe ukwenza ukuba UNGAQINISEKI.
“Akukho mntu unokunqanda le nguqulelo yakho iqinisekileyo, yomelele ukuba uye kwiindawo ezithile.
Ngoku ekubeni uwuqonda ngcono umonakalo ngokwasengqondweni wokuqhathwa, umbuzo ke uba "Ndiqhubela phambili njani emva kokuqhathwa?"
Indlela Yokusinda Xa Uqhathwa
Ukufunda malunga nendlela ukuqhathwa ekutshintsheni kwakho ngonaphakade kuyaqondakala ukuba ube nexhala elincinci malunga nento oyigcinele yona. Nangona, ngengqondo encinci, unokukwazi ukubuyisela umva umonakalo wengqondo wokuqhathwa.
Kuyavunywa ukuba, akuyi kuba lula kangako kodwa akukho nto iluncedo ilula ukuba uyayicinga. Makhe sithethe ngezinto ezimbalwa onokuzenza ukuze uqiniseke ukuba iimvakalelo emva kokuba uqhathiwe azikuchazi ukuba ungubani
1. Thatha ikhefu
Kungakhathaliseki ukuba u-stoic kangakanani, iimvakalelo emva kokukhohliswa ziya kukwehlisela kwinqanaba elinye okanye kwelinye. Uya kudandatheka ngokuqondakalayo kangangexesha elithile ekubeni isaqhwithi seemvakalelo ezihamba engqondweni yakho akuyi kuba lula ukuhlangabezana nazo.
Kwimeko enjalo, ukuthatha ixesha elithile kubudlelwane, umsebenzi, uxanduva kunokuba luncedo. Thatha ixesha lokuqonda indlela yokuqhubela phambili. Nangona kunjalo, qaphela ukuba ungavumeli oku kuhla kuhlale ixesha elide kunokuba kufanelekile. Phatha ikhefu njengendawo yokuphunyuka okufutshane, kungekhona njengendlela yokuphila. Nje ukuba ubuyele ezinyaweni zakho kwakhona emva kwekhefu, unokukwazi ukubuyisela umva indlela ukuqhathwa okuchaphazela ngayo ubudlelwane bexesha elizayo.
2. Ukuphelisa “ingaba yayilityala lam eli?”
Enye yezona zinto ziyingozi ongayenza emva kokuba uqhathwe kukuzibeka ityala ngenxa yokungathembeki kweqabane lakho. Umlingane wakho uqhathile, esazi iziphumo kunye nokwazi oko kuya kukwenza uzive ungonwabanga. Ukuba ucinga ukuba kukho ingxaki ekhokelele ekubeni baqhathe, ke, ukukopa asiyondlela umntu ajongana ngayo neengxaki. Iqabane lakho bekufanele ukuba libe nencoko nawe, lingangeni kubudlelwane.
Ukuzibek’ ityala yeyona nto isenziwa kukukopela emfazini. Ngokususa iingcinga ezinje, “Ngaba yayilityala lam eli? Ngaba kukho into engalunganga endiyenzileyo?” kufuneka ujolise ekupheliseni nakuphi na ukuzithandabuza. Iimvakalelo emva kokuqhathwa kuya kuba lula kakhulu ukujongana nayo xa sele ukwenzile.
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3. Musa ukuvumela umsindo ukulawule
Asitsho ukuba akufanele ube nomsindo, kuba umsindo ungomnye weemvakalelo eziphambili emva kokuqhathwa. Ngokungathandabuzekiyo, nabani na uya kuba nomsindo ngexesha elithile. Nangona kunjalo, yintoni eyonakalisayo xa uvumela lo msindo uchaphazele ezinye iinkalo zobomi bakho, njengomsebenzi wakho okanye ubuhlobo bakho.
Ngelixa uthatha ikhefu, yamkele into yokuba oku kwenzekile kwaye endaweni yokuphila kwixesha elidlulileyo, gxila kokulandelayo. Ukuba uyazibuza ukuba ukuqhathwa kuyichaphazela njani indoda, umsindo yenye yeemvakalelo eziphambili.
4. Qonda ukuba uya kufumana uthando kwakhona
Xa ingqondo yakho iphazamisekile ngokweemvakalelo emva kokuba uqhathiwe, kulula ukuqalisa ukukholelwa kwizinto ezinje, “Andisokuze ndiphinde ndilufumane uthando, ndiza kufa ndingatshatanga”, okanye “andisokuze ndiphinde ndithembe mntu kwakhona”. Isenokubonakala ikrwada kuwe ngoku, kodwa kungekudala uya kuqonda ukuba ixesha liyawaphilisa onke amanxeba.
Ukuzikhathaza ngekamva koko kukukopela emfazini. Esikhundleni sokukholelwa ukuba ukukhohliswa kukutshintshe ngonaphakade, khetha indlela yokuphilisa kwaye uqale ukukholelwa ukuba ixesha liya kukunceda unqobe yonke imiba yakho. Uya kufumana uthando kwakhona.
5. Funa uncedo lweengcali
Ukubonisana nonyango yenye yezona ndlela zinemveliso ezinokukunceda udlule iimvakalelo emva kokuba uqhathiwe. Uya kukwazi ukuqonda ukuba kutheni uziva ngale ndlela uyiyo kwaye kufuneka uhambe njani malunga nokujongana nezo mvakalelo.
Ukuqhathwa kuyichaphazela njani indoda xa amadoda exhathisa ngakumbi kunyango? Yiloo nto idla ngokuba sisizathu sokuba kubathathe ixesha elide ukucubungula iimvakalelo zabo. Bengakwazi ukuzityand’ igila ngeengxaki zabo, abakhe bajongane nazo ngokwenene. Ngokufuna uncedo lobuchwephesha, uya kuba nakho ukuqonda okona kukulungeleyo kwaye uqokelele ukuzazi kwakho ngelixa ukuyo. Ukuba ngoku uyasokola ukujongana nokuqhathwa, iBonobology ine inkitha yabanyangi abanamava ukuze udlule kweli xesha linzima ebomini bakho.
Indlela ukuqhathwa kwiinguqu wena kuxhomekeke kwindlela obujonga ngayo ubomi, isimo sakho sengqondo, impilo yobudlelwane bakho, kunye nexesha lakho elidlulileyo waphila okanye ekwabelwana amava. "Ubomi bubuza malunga nokuthembela, ukunyaniseka, kunye nokholo. Sonke sinikwe ukhetho ebomini, emva kokuqhathwa omnye unokuba nokuzimela kwaye uzimele ngamandla okanye ube ngumntu onobukrakra, ongalunganga. Ukhetho lolwakho, "uphetha uNishim.
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Ukukopela kutshabalalisa iikona ezimbini zobudlelwane - ukuthembana kunye nentlonipho. Ngaphandle kwezi zinto zibalulekileyo, awunakuthemba ukuba uya kuba namandla, ubudlelwane obuphilileyo.
Akukho xesha libambekayo lokufumana ngaphezulu kokuqhathwa. Ngoncedo lweengcali kunye nonyango, unokuyibeka emva kwakho ngexesha elifanelekileyo. Nangona kunjalo, kwinani elibalulekileyo lamatyala, impembelelo yokuqhathwa inokuhlala nawe ngonaphakade.
Ukuba uthe waqhathwa kwaye awukwazanga ukusetyenzwa kwaye ugqithise isiqendu, unokuphela ngokuzisa imiba yokuthembana, ukungazithembi, utyekelo lomona kunye ne-paranoia kubudlelwane bakho bexesha elizayo.
Hayi, ukukopela akunakuze kulunge. Hayi naxa kwenziwe ukuba ubuyele kwiqabane ukukopela. Ukuba ukhohlisiwe, unokhetho ezimbini kuphela ezifumanekayo kuwe - ukuphelisa ubudlelwane kwaye uqhubeke, okanye uhlale kwaye uzame ukunika enye isibhamu.
Ukusinda kuMntu-Amanyathelo ali-12 okubuyisela Uthando kunye nokuThembela kuMtshato
Umnikelo wakho awuquki isisa umnikelo. Iya kuvumela i-Bonobology ukuba iqhubeke nokukuzisela ulwazi olutsha nolwangoku kwiphulo lethu lokunceda nabani na osehlabathini ukuba afunde ukwenza nantoni na.
