Kungo-3 AM futhi nakhu usucabanga ngokweqile ubudlelwano bakho bonke. Uyazibuza, "Ngabe ngikahle embhedeni? Ingabe umlingani wami useze wangikhanga? Ingabe kujwayelekile ukuthi ungakhangwa umlingani wakho?" Yonke le mibuzo, okungenzeka ukuthi ibangelwe ukwehla kwezinga locansi ebudlelwaneni bakho, ikubeka emizamweni eshubile yokuthola ukuthi ungaba kanjani isithandwa esingcono.
Ukucabanga kwakho ngokweqile kunengqondo nokho. Phela, ukusondelana ngokocansi kuyisici esibaluleke kakhulu sobudlelwano obuphumelelayo. Ngokusho kocwaningo , esinye sezizathu ezinkulu zokuthi imibhangqwana ihlukane nothando kwakuwukulahlekelwa ukusondelana. Futhi awufuni nje ukuphelela ungumuntu onjalo. Iqiniso lokuthi ulapha, uzama ukuthola impendulo yokuthi “ungaba kanjani isithandwa esingcono kumyeni wami noma umkami noma umlingani wami” libonisa ukuthi uyakhathalela impilo yobuhlobo bakho futhi awukahambi endleleni eshelelayo yokuzethemba. Nokho, ngiyabonga!
Ngokuphathelene nokugcina inhlansi yenkanuko ivutha, ungakhathazeki, sikusekele. Silapha ukuzokusiza emzamweni wakho wokuthuthukisa umdlalo wakho wezocansi futhi uthole ukuthi ungaba kanjani umthandi ongcono embhedeni, osekelwa yimibono yochwepheshe evela kudokotela wezocansi uDkt. Rajan Bhonsle (MD, MBBS Medicine and Surgery), obenguchwepheshe wezocansi iminyaka engaphezu kwamashumi amathathu.
Ungaba Kanjani Isithandwa Esingcono - 11 Amathiphu Ochwepheshe Ngomelaphi Wocansi
Okuqukethwe
UDkt. Bhonsle uthi, “Iseluleko sokuthi ungaba kanjani isithandwa esihle siyahlukahluka kuye ngesimo futhi asinakukhulunywa ngaso sonke isikhathi. Isibonelo, amathiphu ami kubantu ababili abangenalo ucansi emshadweni ngeke asebenze kulabo abanokungavumelani ngocansi lomlomo ebudlelwaneni.” Ngakho-ke, kuye ngokuthi ukuphi, bhala phansi amathiphu awusizo asebenza kuwe:
1. Sebenzisa ama-3 C okuxhumana
Indlela yokujabulisa indoda embhedeni noma indlela yokujabulisa owesifazane embhedeni - kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yini inkinga yakho, yazi ukuthi inqubo yokwakha ukusondelana iqala ngaphandle kwekamelo lokulala. Ucansi emshadweni noma ebudlelwaneni ngeke buphumelele ngaphandle uma abalingani bevumelana komunye nomunye ngokomzwelo. Ngalokho, kubalulekile ukuthi niqondane futhi ningathukutheli lapho nibona nje ukungaphatheki kahle noma ukuklolodela umlingani wakho uma engakunikezeli ngokushesha okuthile okucelile. Konke lokhu kungenziwa kuphela ngokukhulumisana okuvulekile, nokwethembeka. UDkt. Bhonsle ukhuluma ngama-3 Cs wamakhono okuxhumana:
- Qedela imisho yakho: Cacisa kakhulu ngalokho okufunayo embhedeni. Isibonelo, amanye amaklayenti ami akhuluma ngendlela athanda ngayo ukuqabula okude, okumanzi kwesiFulentshi kuyilapho amanye ethanda ama-peck athambile. Yiziphi izintandokazi zakho? Futhi abalingani bakho? Khuluma ngalezi zinto ukuze uthole ukuhlangana kwakho kwezocansi
- Ukubonakaliswa okucacile kwezidingo: Veza ngokucacile umzimba wakho obucayi futhi izidingo ezingokomzwelo. Ukuthi “Hmmmm” kungasho izinto ezihlukile. Umlingani wakho akayena umfundi wengqondo ongakwazi ukuthola ngocingo uma ucasukile noma uyangabaza
- Ukuxhumana okukhathalelayo: Ukunakekela kwakho nokukhathazeka kwakho ngomlingani wakho kufanele kubonakale endleleni okhuluma ngayo naye. Gwema ukugxeka. Uma usho into efana nokuthi, “Uhlala uba ne-orgasm maduze nje”, uzithela njengomhloli, ohlola ukusebenza komunye umuntu embhedeni kunozakwethu owabelana naye futhi ojabulela isipiliyoni naye.
2. Thola indlela ephakathi ukuze uqiniseke ukuthi izidingo zozakwethu ziyahlangatshezwa
Ungaba kanjani isithandwa esingcono kumkami? Ngingenza kanjani ucansi lube mnandi kumyeni wami? Mina nozakwethu singayikhulisa kanjani inkanuko yethu? – Impendulo kuyo yonke le mibuzo igxila ekuqinisekiseni ukuthi izidingo zozakwethu zombili ziyanakwa futhi zihlangatshezwana nezikhathi zakho zokusondelana, ikakhulukazi lapho lezi zidingo ziphikiswa kakhulu.
Ingabe ukugona ngemva kocansi kubalulekile komunye wenu kuyilapho omunye edinga isikhala? Ingabe umlingani wakho uthanda ucansi lwasekuseni noma lwantambama futhi uthanda ukuthi lube sebusuku? Kuthiwani ngezintandokazi zakho ku-foreplay? Ukukhuluma ngalezi zici kanye nokuthola indawo emaphakathi ezicini lapho izidingo zakho zihlukile kusemqoka. “Elinye ikhasimende lami lalingakuthandi ukugonwa ngemva kocansi ngoba lalilala kancane kodwa umkakhe wayefuna ukugona.Lokhu kungqubuzana kwezidingo zabo kwabashiya bobabili bezizwa benganelisekile.Ezimweni ezinjalo, ngeluleka abalingani ukuba bahlangane phakathi nendawo, isibonelo, ukugonana imizuzu engu-15 ngemva kocansi noma ngezimpelasonto”.
“Ngokunjalo, eminye imibhangqwana inokungaboni ngaso linye mayelana nokuthi kufanele baye nini ocansini. Owesilisa angase azizwe evuka ekuseni kakhulu kodwa owesifazane angase ancamele ukusondelana ebusuku. Uma uthanda othile, ugcina umqondo ovulekile futhi uvumelane nokuxoxisana ngezinto ezinjalo. Awuyizondi imikhuba yabo emincane engavamile, empeleni, lezo yizici ezibalulekile ozenzayo uDkt.
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3. Sungula okungaxoxiswana ngakho
Ungaba kanjani umthandi omuhle? Thola ukuthi yini umlingani wakho ayithandayo futhi angayithandi embhedeni. Ukunaka i-nitty gritty kubaluleke kakhulu. UDkt. Bhonsle uyachaza: “Umbhangqwana engangiweluleke waphonseka onqenqemeni lwesehlukaniso ngenxa nje yokuthi wawuhlulekile ukubeka imingcele yobulili ebuhlotsheni bawo naphezu kokuba wawusebudlelwaneni iminyaka emithathu ngaphambi komshado.” Lona wesifazane wafaka isehlukaniso ngoba umyeni wakhe wayefuna ukuzama ubulili bendunu, okuyinto akuthola kuyisenzo esinengekayo.
"Nakuba imingcele yomuntu ingase iguquguquke uma kuziwa ekuqabuleni noma ekuqomisaneni, ukucindezela othile ukuba azame izenzo zocansi angakhululekile ngazo kungaba nemiphumela emibi. Isihluthulelo sokuthola ukuthi ungamjabulisa kanjani owesifazane embhedeni - noma indoda, empeleni - ukuthola ukuthi yini eyamukelekayo nengamukeleki. Khumbula, indima yemvume ayinakunakwa, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukusiphi isigaba sobudlelwano."
4. Sebenzisa ulimi oluthi “Mina” esikhundleni sokuthi “wena”
UDkt. Bhonsle ukhuluma ngokuningiliziwe ngolimi elithi “I” ebudlelwaneni obuseduze. Ugcizelela ukuthi umuntu kufanele athi, “Ngingathanda ukuthi ugone ngemva kocansi”, esikhundleni sokuthi, “Uhlala ubalekela ucansi”. Ngokufanayo, esikhundleni sokuthi, “Ungabujabulela kanjani ubulili bomlomo?
Uyanezela, “Izwi lokusola noma lokululaza lingenza umuntu azizwe elahliwe futhi limenze azivikele. Nakuba unelungelo lokuveza okuthandayo nokwabelana ngezinto ozithandayo nezingathandeki nomlingani wakho, kumelwe uqaphele ekukhetheni kwakho amagama. Kungenzeka ukuthi cha ocansini noma ezenzweni ezithile zocansi ngaphandle kokulimaza imizwa yomlingani wakho.”
5. I-Orgasm ayiwona umgomo wokugcina
Lokhu kungenxa yesithandwa esikuwe – ucansi aluhlali luholela ekufikeni kocansi. UDkt. Bhonsle uthi, “Uma ufuna ukuba isithandwa esingcono, kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi ukuvuthwa kobulili akuyona impoqo kuzo zonke izenzo. Izikhathi eziningi, abesilisa nabesifazane abakwazi ukuvuthwa kobulili ngesikhathi socansi kodwa bazisize bafinyelele ezingeni eliphezulu kamuva. Ngezinye izikhathi, umlingani oyedwa kuphela ongase avuse ubulili ngesikhathi socansi bese evuselela omunye ukuba avuse.
Indlela engcono kakhulu yokuthuthukisa izinga locansi emshadweni noma ebudlelwaneni ukugcina izinto zimanzi futhi ziguquguquka ngangokunokwenzeka futhi wenze okukusebenzela kangcono wena nomlingani wakho. Khumbula, ayikho indlela elungile noma engalungile lapha; noma yini ekulethela injabulo nozakwenu iyindlela okufanele uhambe ngayo.
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6. Ungawabukeli phansi amandla okubonisa uthando
Njengoba sishilo ngaphambili, uhambo lokuthola ukuthi ungaba kanjani isithandwa esingcono embhedeni luqala ngaphandle kwekamelo lokulala. Uma ulwa nokungabi bikho kocansi emshadweni noma ubudlelwano, noma noma ufuna ukuthuthukisa ikhwalithi yocansi, kufanele wakhele ekujuleni ukuxhumana kwakho nomuntu wakho obalulekile.
Enye indlela eqinisekile yokwenza lokho iwukukhuthaza ukusondelana ngokomzimba ebudlelwaneni . UDkt. Bhonsle weluleka ngokuthi, “Ukubonisana uthando okungeyona eyocansi njengokubambana ngezandla, ukugona, ukuqabulana, nokuqabulana konke kubaluleke kakhulu ekwenzeni abalingani ababili bazizwe bexhumene kakhulu futhi benamathelene.” Ngakho-ke, yenza umzamo wokwenza umlingani wakho azizwe ethandwa ngaphandle kwekamelo lokulala uma ufuna ukwandisa ukushisa ngaphakathi.
7. Yehlisa ijubane futhi ujabulele umlingani wakho
Lokhu kubamba i-foreplay kanye nocansi. Abantu bavame ukukhukhuleka lapho kushisa kangangokuthi abaziniki isikhathi sokuthokozela isipiliyoni sokusondelana nabalingani babo. Ukushintsha lokho kungaba isinyathelo sokuqala sokuba isithandwa esingcono komunye wakho obalulekile.
Uma uzibuza ukuthi “ungaba kanjani umthandi ongcono kumkami/intombi yami” noma “ungenza kanjani ucansi lube mnandi kakhulu kumyeni/isoka lami”, lena indawo enhle ongaqala kuyo. Zinike isikhathi esanele sokuhlola imizimba yomunye nomunye futhi nizitike ngokudlala ngaphambilini okuyinkimbinkimbi kaningi ngangokunokwenzeka. Uma usuvele ukwenza lokho, zama ukwehlisa ijubane futhi ujabulele yonke imizuzu. Bheka emehlweni omlingani wakho futhi ujabulele ngempela ukwenza uthando . Imfihlo iwukuzigcina usesimweni samanje futhi ujabulele ngempela isipiliyoni.
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8. Zama izikhundla ezintsha nezihlukile embhedeni
Wonke umuntu unelungelo lokuhlola, ukuveza, kanye nokuhlola lokho okumvusayo, okujabulisayo, nokumenelisayo. Lokhu kubalulekile ekwakheni ubudlelwano obanelisayo. Akukhona nje ngezikhundla ozijabulelayo kodwa nalezo ofuna ukuzilinga. Ungazibeki umkhawulo, ngokusekelwe kokuhlangenwe nakho kwesikhathi esidlule, futhi uvulele izinto ezintsha. Sithembe, ukuzethemba kuwukhiye.
Ukuhlola izikhundla ezintsha kuba kubaluleke kakhulu uma wena noma umlingani wakho nibhekene nezinkinga ezithile zempilo. Isibonelo, uma isoka/umyeni wakho ebhekene nokungasebenzi kahle kwe-erectile noma ukukhathazeka ngokusebenza kocansi, ukuvuleleka ekuzameni embhedeni kungaba yimpendulo yakho yokuthi ungamjabulisa kanjani indoda embhedeni. Izikhundla ezithile zingabasiza ukuthi benze kangcono. Ngokufanayo, amadoda angaba ngcono embhedeni ngokuzama izikhundla ezijabulisa kakhulu abalingani bawo.
9. Hlola eyakho neyozakwenu izindawo ezingajwayelekile
Umzimba womuntu ubusiswe ngenhlanganisela ethakazelisayo yezindawo ezikhipha umoya futhi lezi zingahluka kumuntu nomuntu. Ukuhlola izindawo ezikhipha umoya futhi uchithe isikhathi usebenza kuzo kuyindlela eqinisekile yokuyisa ikhemistri yakho yocansi ezingeni elilandelayo. Kusukela ekwangeni entanyeni kuya ekunceleni indlebe, kusukela emathangeni kuya ezinzwaneni nasemadolweni, kusukela ekunceleni kuya ekulumeni okuthambile - kunendawo enkulu yokuzama lapha.
Uma ufuna ukufunda ukuthi ungaba kanjani isithandwa esingcono ekamelweni, qala ngokuhlola izindawo ze-erogenous zomunye nomunye ngezindlela ezahlukene. Ngalokhu kuhlolana okubonakala kulula kwemizimba yomunye nomunye, ungakwazi ukukhulisa ukushuba kokuhlanganyela kocansi ngokugqamayo.
10. Bamangaze ngezinto ezintsha
Ukusondelana ekamelweni lokulala kungaphezu nje kokudlala ngaphambi komshado kanye nocansi, futhi awukwazi ukuqeda ukufunda ukuthi ungaba kanjani umthandi ongcono ngaphandle kokuthi usebenze ezintweni ezibalulekile ezibeka ithoni yesifiso nothando ekamelweni lokulala . Uma uzibuza ukuthi "ungaba kanjani umthandi ongcono kumyeni wami" noma "ungenza kanjani umkami abe nesimo sengqondo", khona-ke lawa macebiso avela kumqeqeshi wobudlelwano nokusondelana uShivanya Yogmayaa angakusiza:
- Gqokisani, ninuke i-sexy futhi nithandane njengabantu abangabazi futhi
- Thatha ibhavu lokugeza noma ishawa ndawonye
- Vala amehlo bakhumulane
- Gxila umlingani wakho ngomdanso odwetshiwe
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Umyeni Wami Akanamandla Futhi Ngithandana Nomunye Umuntu
11. Jabulela ingxenye ngayinye yokusondelana ekamelweni
Ngaphambi kokuthi niqale isenzo, xhumanani ngempela. Ukuzama ukuthintana okungeyona eyocansi njengokuphana ukubhucungwa komzimba kungaba yinto ephumuzayo futhi kusize imibhangqwana ukuthi ixhumane kabusha ngokuseduze kakhulu kunokumane nje ihlanganyele ocansini. Dlalani umculo wokuphumula bese nikhanyisa amakhandlela njengoba nizinakekela. Manje njengoba senijabulele ukugeza, ukubhucungwa umzimba, umdanso wokuziklebhula, ukugcona, i-foreplay, kanye nocansi olumangalisayo, nambitha ingxenye elandelayo futhi.
Uma usuqedile ngesenzo, ungacabangi ngokushesha ngokugqoka noma ukulala. Chitha isikhathi esithile ugonoza. Izikhathi ngemva kocansi yizona ezithembeke kakhulu futhi ezisengozini. Chitha lezo zikhathi ulele ezingalweni zomlingani wakho, uphulula izinwele noma umzimba ngokungenangqondo, futhi ukhulume naye. Uma ungeyena omkhulu ekukhulumeni, sebenzisa lezo zikhathi uthule, kodwa qiniseka ukuthi uyasijabulela leso sikhathi ndawonye.
Izikhombi Ezibalulekile
- Ukuze ube isithandwa esingcono kumlingani wakho, udinga ukubaqonda kanye nezidingo zabo - kokubili ngokomzwelo nezocansi
- Yisho ngokucacile izinto ezingaxoxiswana zakho futhi ubeke imingcele yocansi kusenesikhathi
- Sebenzisa isitatimende esithi “Mina” ukuveza izidingo zakho kumlingani wakho
- Ungagxili emibonweni engemihle yokuthi ucansi oluhle kufanele lube njani; noma yini ekusebenzelayo wena nomlingani wakho iyindlela okufanele uhambe ngayo
- Beka kuqala ukukhombisa uthando okungezona ezocansi ukuze ujulise isibopho senu
- Qhubeka umangaza umlingani wakho ngezinto ezintsha futhi nihlola imizimba yomunye nomunye ukuze nigcine uthando luvutha
Imicabango yethu yokugcina ingasebenzisa inothi elilula, kanye nezeluleko ezindala ezivela ku- How to be a good lover , incwadi ehlelwe yi-Bodleian library, “Ungazami ukuqabulana esikebheni ngaphandle kokuthi nobabili nikwazi ukubhukuda futhi ungaqabuli isithandwa sakho nesigqoko sakho sisasekhanda lakho.” Ngaphandle kwamahlaya, uma nje ungalahlekelwa ilukuluku lakho ngomlingani wakho, uzothola izindlela ezintsha zokuxhumana naye.
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