Senziwe sakholelwa ukuthi ucansi lulodwa yinto esondelene kakhulu ebudlelwaneni. Kuthiwani uma sikutshela ukuthi kukhona ezinye izindlela ezingezona ezocansi ezizokwenza uzizwe usondelene kakhulu futhi usondelene nomlingani wakho kunesiqephu sokwenza ishawa elishisayo? Eqinisweni, ukusondelana okungekona ubulili kungasiza ekukhuliseni imizwa yenu ngomunye nomunye ibe uthando oluyisipesheli, oluvuthiwe.
Kuhle ukuba nobulili obumangalisayo kuyo yonke inkazimulo yayo engcolile kanye nokuziqhenya okukhanyayo. Nakuba ubulili buyingxenye ebalulekile yobudlelwane kwabaningi, ngokuqinisekile akuyona yonke into futhi ukuphela kwakho konke ukuxhumana kwezothando. Ucansi lungasekela ukuxhumana kwakho ngalezo zinsuku zokuqala zobudlelwane, kodwa umuzwa wokuthi 'angikwazi ukususa izandla zami kuwe' uyaphela ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Ebuhleni nasebubini bempilo, udinga izindlela ezingezona ezocansi ukuze usondelane nowakwakho noma umlingani wakho ukuze uqhubekisele phambili ubudlelwano bakho.
Ikhono lokukhulisa ukusondelana ngaphandle kocansi liyisisekelo sobudlelwano obuhlala njalo nobuphumelelayo. Asisho ukuthi akufanele ubeke isikhathi sakho ekwenzeni ucansi olujabulisayo nolumangalisayo nomunye nomunye. Kusho nje ukuthi kufanele kugcizelelwe nakwezinye izindlela zokusondelana ebudlelwaneni bakho, yingakho senze uhlu lwemibono yokusondelana emangazayo, engeyona ezocansi ukuze ukhulise impilo yakho yothando.
Izindlela Eziyi-13 Zokukhombisa Uthando Ngaphandle Kokwenza Ucansi
Okuqukethwe
UMarshal noJoyce baba nokugijima ngekhanda esakeni phakathi nezinsuku zokuqala zobudlelwane babo. Ucansi lwalusetafuleni noma nini lapho behlangana, futhi kwakubonakala sengathi uthando lwabo lwalunganeliseki. Khona-ke, njengoba imizwa yabo ngomunye nomunye ikhula ngamandla futhi ubuhlobo buthola isigqi, i-streak evuthayo yalahlekelwa umkhawulo. Yilapho-ke abazithola bezibuza ukuthi, “Zikhona yini izindlela zokuthandana ngaphandle kocansi?
Ngokuqinisekile, ngemva kokucabangisisa, ukukhuluma nabangane nokufunda mayelana nezenzo ezingezona ezocansi zezibonelo zokusondelana nokuvula, bakwazi ukuthola izindlela zokuxhuma omunye nomunye ezingeni elijulile. NjengoMarshal noJoyce, nawe ungase uzithole usesikhathini lapho ukusondelana kuba okungaphezu nje kobulili.
Nakuba kukuhle ukuba nocansi olumangalisayo nolunesifiso, ungaluqinisa ubudlelwano bakho ngokuzitika njalo ngalezi zindlela ezilandelayo zokusondelana okungezona ezobulili. Ngeke ziholele ekufikeni kobulili obufanayo, kodwa ngokuqinisekile zizokwenza uzizwe usondelene kakhulu. Ukuze uqale, nansi imibono engu-13 yokusondelana okungezona ezobulili ongayihlola:
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izindlela Ezilula Ezingu-20 Zokuthandana
1. Ukuhamba ngesandla ngesandla
Uke waqaphela ukuthi amamuvi agxila kanjani ekubambeni izandla nasekuhambeni emzileni ongenamuntu onezimbali nezihlahla ezikleliswe emaceleni, nomoya wasolwandle oklabisa kancane izinwele zabadlali? Nakuba lokho kungase kungenzeki kithi sonke, sisengakwazi ukuhambahamba kancane sibambene futhi siphululana izandla futhi sizizwe kahle ngakho.
Ukuhamba kancane, uma ubamba izandla noma usonga izingalo, noma umane ubeka ikhanda lakho emahlombe abo, kungashiya umuzwa omuhle nohlala njalo. Akungabazeki ukuthi kungenye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokubonisa uthando ngaphandle kokuqabulana noma ukuba nobuhlobo bobulili. Kungenye yemibono yokusondelana okungeyona eyocansi ephumelela kakhulu ongayisebenzisa ebudlelwaneni bakho.
2. Ukuqabula esiphongweni
Ingabe ufuna izindlela okungezona ezocansi ukuze usondelane nowakwakho noma nomlingani wakho? Nokho, ayikho indlela engcono yokuhlakulela ukusondelana ngaphandle kobulili kunokuthintana ngokomzimba nokushukuma komzimba okunothando. Phakathi kwalaba, ukuqabulana esiphongweni kukhona iligi ehlukene.
Nakuba ukuqabula okushisayo kuvame ukukhulunywa ngakho, ukuqabula ebunzini kwanele ukwenza umlingani wakho azizwe ejabule futhi ephephile ngomzuzwana. Gxila ukuze uthinte kancane isiphongo somlingani wakho ngezindebe zakho, noma uthinte intamo yomlingani wakho ukuze utshale ukuqabula okuthambile. Umlingani wakho uzovala amehlo akhe futhi ajabule okwamanje, kuyilapho uthola ukubona ubuso bakhe bukhanya.
3. Ukudlala ngaphansi kwetafula
Ubudlelwano obungenalo ucansi kuphela akufanele buphazanyiswe nobudlelwano obungenalo ucansi . Nisengafisana futhi nizizwe inhliziyo yenu ishaya ngamandla ngokuba seduze nomlingani wakho noma ukubabona ngemva kosuku olude. Umbuzo uwukuthi, niyiveza kanjani le mizwa uma ningayi ocansini?
Kuthiwani ngokuthinta okuthile okudlalayo ngaphansi kwetafula ngenkathi unesidlo sakusihlwa esithule? Vele ukhumule izicathulo zakho futhi udlale i-footsie kancane. Awekho amazwi ocansi, ukuthinta nje okudlalayo, okuthambile ngaphandle kokunye ukuthinta. Ungahlali isikhathi eside kakhulu; ukuphulula nje ezimbalwa bese ngidedela. Lokhu okunye okumangazayo okungekona okocansi okuzokwenza uzizwe unenkanuko futhi unothando.
4. Ukuphulula izinwele kungaba isenzo esihle sokusondelana okungezona ezocansi
Ukuphulula izinwele zomlingani wakho kuyindlela enhle yokubonisa ukuthi uyamkhathalela futhi kusiza ekuxhumaneni, okwenza kube enye yezindlela ezifunwa kakhulu ezingezona ezocansi zokwakha ukusondelana. Wonke umuntu uthanda ukuzizwa ethandwa futhi enakekelwa, futhi ukuphulula iminwe yakho ngomhlwenga womlingani wakho kuzokwenza lokho kanye. Ukuphulula izinwele kubhekwa njengokuphumuzayo nokunciphisa ukucindezeleka. Kuyindlela enhle yokwazisa umlingani wakho ukuthi uyamthanda. Uma ugona, vele ugijimise iminwe yakho phezu kwekhanda lomlingani wakho ngendlela yokudlala.
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izinhlobo Ezi-8 Zokusondelana Ebudlelwaneni
5. Mgone umlingani wakho njalo, ngaphandle kwesizathu
Ukugona kunamandla okuphulukisa, ukuqeda ukucindezeleka, nokukhulisa isimo sengqondo. Kukhulisa imvelo, futhi kunikeza omunye umuntu umuzwa wokufudumala, ukwamukelwa, nokuvikeleka. Omunye wemibono engcono kakhulu yokusondelana okungeyona eyocansi okufanele uyisebenzise, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukusiphi isigaba sobudlelwano , ukugona lapho umlingani wakho ebuya emsebenzini, noma lapho ezizwa ecindezelekile kakhulu.
Wanga umlingani wakho lapho nobabili nibhekene nezikhathi ezinzima - kuzomenza azizwe sengathi nindawonye kulokhu. Empeleni awudingi isizathu sokugona umlingani wakho. Lapho usukuma, ngenkathi uqhubeka nomsebenzi wakho wosuku, lapho nibonana, noma yini ejabulisayo, noma yini edabukisayo - ningagona izikhathi eziningi!
6. Ukumbambatha noma ukukhama ngenkathi uhamba
Manje, lokhu akufani nokushaya esinqeni. Kuthi ukumbambatha kancane emhlane noma ukumpintshana ihlombe njengoba niphambana ephaseji, noma niyokha ingilazi yamanzi ekhishini ufice owakwakho ewasha noma eqoba imifino, enganakile ukuthi ukhona. Ukuthepha okuthambile, ukuhlikihlwa kungazelelwe - kuzothuthukisa isimo sengqondo somlingani wakho ngokushesha futhi kukugcwalise ngomuzwa wenjabulo nawe.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ucansi luhle futhi lushisa kangakanani, yilezi zenzo ezingezona ezocansi zezibonelo zokusondelana noma izenzo ezingaphandle kwalezo zikhathi eziqhutshwa yinkanuko eziqinisa ubuhlobo benu. Yingakho lesi senzo esibonakala singabalulekile siphakathi kwemikhuba imibhangqwana ebudlelwaneni obuhle efunga ngayo. Kungenye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu zokuba nobuhlobo bobulili nomlingani wakho.
7. Bakitaze ukuze bahleke
Nokho, kungase kucasule ngezinye izikhathi kodwa ukukitazana ngenjongo yokuzijabulisa nje kuyindlela enhle yokuthola ukuthintana, ubonise uthando ngaphandle kokuqabulana, futhi uvumele ukugigitheka nokuhleka kulandele. Ukukitaza uphathina wakho kungawenza akhululeke ngokushesha umoya wakhe futhi kukhiphe uchungechunge lokuhleka okuvamise ukuphetha ngokugona okujulile kanye nokupeki okuncane.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, kukwenza uzizwe ujabule amahora amaningi ngemva kwalokho. Ungase ugcine ulwa nomcamelo (yeka ukuthi kuhle kangakanani lokho!) noma ulwa ngokudlala embhedeni ngemva kokukitaza. Lezi zikhathi zokudlala ziyindlela enhle yokuxhumana nomlingani wakho uma ningenzi ucansi. Uma ufuna imibono yokusondelana okungeyona eyocansi, lena ingenye.
8. Badonse eduze lapho belele
Hhayi lapho umlingani wakho elele ubuthongo obukhulu, kodwa lapho ulala, donsa umlingani wakho kuye ngobumnene noma uphushe umzimba wakho eduze nowakhe. Vele uvumele imizimba yakho ithintane ngaphandle kokusondelana ngokocansi. Thinta ubuso bomlingani wakho ngeminwe yakho, bamba uqinise, bese ubeke imilenze yakho komunye nomunye. Gcoba usuku ngokulala okuhlebezayo, njengoba uthola induduzo ezingalweni zomunye nomunye. Lena enye yezindlela ezijabulisa kakhulu zokwakha ukusondelana okungezona ezocansi ebudlelwaneni.
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9. Ukubhucungwa okufushane ngaphambi kokuba ulale
Wake wazibuza ukuthi kungenzeka yini ukuthi uzizwe sengathi wenza ucansi ngaphandle kokuthintana ngokocansi? Uma uthi yebo, khona-ke lokhu kungomunye wemibono ongase uzame yona yokusondelana okungekona okocansi. Ngaphambi nje kokuthi ushaye isaka bese ulibiza ngokuthi usuku, nikeza umlingani wakho imassage. Thatha izinyawo zomlingani wakho emathangeni akho bese uziphulula ngobumnene ngeminwe yakho.
Akudingekile ukuba kube ukubhucungwa kwengcindezi, ukunyakaza okumbalwa nje okuthambile, okuyindilinga ukuze kukhishwe ukukhathala futhi kubenze bazizwe befunwa futhi bethandwa. Noma vele unikeze i-massage emfushane emuva noma ukuhlikihla ihlombe noma nini lapho uzizwa uthanda. Umlingani wakho uzozizwa ekhululekile futhi ebonga. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi bakhathele kangakanani noma belubi kangakanani usuku lwabo, lesi senzo esincane sothando nakanjani sizokuqeda konke ukukhathala kwabo.
10. Ukuqabulana okuncane kungakhuthaza ukusondelana okungezona ezocansi
Wake wazibuza ukuthi kungani ungasamanga umlingani wakho, futhi uma wenza kanjalo, ngokuvamile kuyisenzo sokubonisana? Ukuqabulana kuyindlela enhle yokuxhumana futhi kungenye yezenzo ezinhle kakhulu zothando , noma ngabe kuyingcosana encane ezindebeni. Yebo, akukhulunywa ngezilimi zokudlala lapha, kodwa ukukhuluma ngokunganaki, okuthandekayo, nokuthandekayo ngokuphelele - ukwanga okulula.
I-peck encane ezindebeni lapho uvuka noma ngaphambi kokuba uhambe uye emsebenzini noma uyolala kungenye yezindlela ezinhle kakhulu ezingezona ezocansi zokwakha ukusondelana. Nobabili nizozizwa kahle futhi nijabule ngokuqabulana, futhi ningakwenza lokhu kaningi ngaphandle kwanoma yisiphi isizathu. Lokhu kungenye yezindlela eziphumelela kakhulu zokuvula ezingezona ezocansi ezizokushiya uzizwa ufudumele futhi udidekile ngemva kwesikhathi eside.
11. Bagqolozele emehlweni
Ukube kade nithandana, ngabe nikwenzile lokhu nakanjani. Imibhangqwana emisha, emisha ivame ukuhlala futhi igqolozelene futhi idlale umdlalo ocwayizayo. Noma ubani ocwayiza kuqala, ulahlekelwa igeyimu. Hhayi ukuthi sikutshela ukuthi ugcine amaphuzu, kodwa ukubukana emehlweni kuzonenza nobabili ukubaleka kukho konke okwenzeka eduze kwenu - noma ngabe imizuzwana embalwa. Uzozwa sengathi kade uphuthelwa yilolu xhumo. Kuzonika ubudlelwano bakho impilo entsha.
12. Ukubambana ngezandla
Usafuna izindlela zokubonisa uthando ngaphandle kokuqabulana noma ukwakha ukusondelana ngaphandle kocansi? Nokho, ukubambana ngezandla kuyindlela eqinisekile. Kanjalo nje. Ngesikhathi uhamba. Ngesikhathi ubukele i-TV. Ngesikhathi ukhuluma nomunye nomunye. Ngesikhathi ulele. Cishe noma nini, noma kuphi. Bamba izandla zomunye nomunye zibambene futhi uzikhumbuze ukuthi zifanelana kahle kangakanani. Zenzelwe ngempela ukufanelana! Izindlela zokuba nobuhlobo obuseduze ngaphandle kocansi azikwazi ukuba ngcono kunalokhu.
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13. Ukubukela umabonakude ikhanda libekwe emahlombe noma emathangeni abo
Enye indlela yakudala yokuzizwa usondelene nomlingani wakho futhi umenze azizwe ethandwa. Ngenkathi ubukele imuvi yakho eyintandokazi noma uhlelo lwe-TV ugqoke izingubo zokulala, mane ubambelele ezingalweni zomlingani wakho bese ubeka ikhanda lakho emahlombe akhe noma esifubeni. Ungase uzizwe uthanda ukuthatha isihlwathi, njengoba induduzo nemfudumalo kwakha eduze kwakho. Iphunga lomzimba wabo lizohlangana nezinzwa zakho futhi ungase usondele kancane. Kuyindlela enhle yokuhlangana. Noma ungaphumuza ikhanda lakho emathangeni abo, kwakha isibopho sokukhulisa futhi ubavumele ukuthi baphulule izinwele zakho kancane.
Ucansi alunakukusiza udlule lapho isikhathi sakho somshado sesiphelile , futhi alukwazi ukuhlala lushisa futhi lumangalisa njengoba lwalunjalo ezinsukwini zokuqala. Yingakho ukuba nekhono ezindleleni zokubonisa uthando ngaphandle kokuqabulana noma ukuba nobuhlobo bobulili kuyilokho okudingayo ukuze ubuhlobo bakho buchume.
Uma usuqale ukusondelana ngokwenyama futhi uthole izindlela ezingezona ezocansi zokwakha ukusondelana, uzoqaphela igagasi elisha lenjabulo nokwaneliseka elibusa emoyeni. Sithemba ukuthi lokhu kuthinta okungezona ezocansi kugcina ubudlelwano bakho bujabule ingunaphakade. Yabelana nathi nganoma yini enye ongathanda ukuyibona ingezwe ohlwini lwemibono engahlangene neyocansi!
Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa
Ukusondelana okungezona ezocansi akubandakanyi noma yiziphi izenzo zocansi. Kusho ukusondelana nomlingani wakho ngokomzwelo nangokwengqondo. Kuhlanganisa nokuthinta umzimba njengokugona, ukubambana ngezandla, ukugona, nokunye, kodwa hhayi ucansi.
Ziningi izindlela zokuthandana nomlingani wakho ngaphandle kokuya ocansini. Ukuthintana okungekona okocansi kubandakanya ukugona, ukugona, ukumisa ikhanda lakho emahlombe omlingani wakho, ukubambana ngezandla, ukuthintana ezingalweni noma imilenze, ukuqabulana esiphongweni, njll.
Lezi Zizinto Eziyi-10 Zingcono Kunezocansi Futhi Wonke Umbhangqwana Kufanele Uzame Lezi!
Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.
Ungalokothi ucabange ngalokhu njengezivumelwano ezigcwalisayo. Manje kufanele ngicabange kabusha ngayinye yalezi.