Uyafuna ukwazi ukuthi uyidlulisa kanjani intukuthelo ehlala ibonakala ivela kuwe? Wonke umuntu uke wezwa ukuthukuthela kanye nomhawu kwesinye isikhathi. Nakuba kuvunywa kabanzi ukuthi intukuthelo nomhawu kungenye yemizwa engemihle kakhulu esilwa nayo, ngezinye izikhathi kungaphezu kwethu ukuyigxeka. Kusukela entukuthelweni kanye nomhawu ebudlelwaneni kuya ekubangweni kwabasebenzi esisebenza nabo noma ngisho nezingane zakini, lo muzwa uthatha izimpande futhi ulolongekile ngisho nasezimpilweni zethu zabantu abadala. Kodwa kunezindlela ezakhayo zokubhekana nokufana. Ungafunda ukuthi ungayiguqula kanjani intukuthelo ibe ugqozi.
Umona nentukuthelo inamandla okudala umonakalo uma ibonakala ebudlelwaneni bezothando ngaphandle uma ungathola indlela yokuyihambisa ngendlela eyakhayo. Kulesi sihloko, sizobheka ukuthi ungayidlulisa kanjani intukuthelo nomhawu ukuze ungalimazi labo abaseduze kwakho, labo obathandayo, nalabo abakuthandayo.
Izizathu Ezingu-5 Zentukuthelo Nomona Ebudlelwaneni
Okuqukethwe
Akuvamile ukuthi abalingani abathandanayo babhekane nemizwa yomona nentukuthelo. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uthukuthele noma unomona ngomlingani wakho noma ngaye, lo muzwa odla wonke ungaba esinye sezibonakaliso zobudlelwano obungenampilo . Ukuze ukwazi ukulwa nawo ngempumelelo, okokuqala udinga ukuqonda izizathu zobudlelwano bomona nentukuthelo. Kulapho-ke kuphela lapho uzokwazi ukuqonda izindlela zokudlulisela intukuthelo nomona wakho, ngoba isinyathelo sokuqala sokwelapha ukuvuma.
Uma uqonda izimbangela zangempela zalolu daba, ukuhlomele kangcono ukubhekana nomlingani othukuthele noma onomona. Uyakwazi futhi ukuqonda kangcono imizwa yakho yentukuthelo nomhawu ngaleyo ndaba. Uma uzibuza ukuthi ungayenza kanjani intukuthelo ibe ugqozi, okokuqala udinga ukwazi ukuthi isukaphi. Nazi ezinye zezizathu eziphezulu zentukuthelo nomhawu ebudlelwaneni:
1. Okwakho ubuthakathaka
Ngokuvamile, intukuthelo nomona ebudlelwaneni kuyisibonakaliso sobuthakathaka bomuntu. Kungenzeka ukuthi umuntu obonisa lezi zindlela zokuthambekela uke waba nokuhlangenwe nakho okubuhlungu esikhathini esidlule. Lokhu okuhlangenwe nakho kungazala izinkinga ezifihliwe, ezingaba imbangela yentukuthelo nomona futhi ungase uzithole ubhekene nesoka noma intombi engazethembi. Ezimweni ezinjalo lapho intukuthelo eqondile ivuswa khona yinto encane, izinto cishe zizowohloka ngokushesha okukhulu.
Uma ufuna ukugqashula kulobu bumbi, ungangabazi ukwabelana ngobungozi bakho nozakwenu. Uma bebona futhi bemukela lobu buthakathaka, ubudlelwano bakho buzoba namandla kubo. Ngakho-ke, ukudlulisa intukuthelo kusho futhi ukuthi uvumela umlingani wakho kumfihlo yakho kanye nobuthakathaka bakho ukuze amandla angenamsebenzi asetshenziswe kangcono, okungukuthi ukwakha ubuhlobo bakho.
2. Ukuzinyeza
Kungani umlingani wami ethukuthele futhi enomona njalo? Kungani ngingakwazi ukuzizwa ngithukuthele futhi nginomona? Uma noma yimuphi wale mibuzo uvamile ebudlelwaneni bakho, kungase kudingeke uhlole ngokunephutha umuzwa womuntu othintekayo. Ukungazethembi noma ukuzethemba kuyizisusa ezivamile zentukuthelo nomhawu ebudlelwaneni. Lapho umuntu ezizwa engazethembi noma ekhanga, angase akuthole kunzima ukukholelwa ukuthi umlingani wakhe uyamthanda futhi uyamazisa. Lo muzwa oqhubekayo wokungabaza ungaba umthombo wentukuthelo nomhawu.
Enye yezindlela ezingcono zokudlulisa intukuthelo yakho ezimweni ezinjalo iwukusebenzela ekuzithuthukiseni uze ufike ezingeni lokuba nomuzwa ongcono wokuzethemba. Ngokunqoba imizwa yakho yokunganeliseki ngakuwena, uzokwazi ukunqoba ngempumelelo ukuzethemba kwakho okuphansi futhi usebenzise leyo ntukuthelo nomhawu ekusebenziseni kangcono.
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3. Okulindelwe okungenangqondo
Uma umuntu elindele ukuthi impilo yomlingani wakhe izungeze yena yedwa, ukwehluleka okubonakalayo ukufeza okulindelwe kungaba yimbangela yomona ebudlelwaneni. Ezimweni ezinjalo, umthwalo wokulungisa uwela nakumlingani othukuthele nonomona. Ukuba nokulindela okungokoqobo kuzoqinisekisa ukuthi ninobudlelwano obuhle. Amacala, lapho intukuthelo eqondile ibangelwa khona njalo, azogcina elimaza bobabili abalingani ekugcineni.
Uma ukhathazekile ngokuthi ungayidlulisela kanjani intukuthelo yakho ekukhuthazeni, udinga ukuhlola kabusha lokho okulindele. Kubalulekile ukuthi uhlale uzikhumbuza ukuthi wena nozakwenu anikwazi ukuchitha sonke isikhathi nindawonye nokuthi zonke izinqumo zabo kanye nokukhetha kwabo impilo akunakugxilwa kuwena. Zama ukuhambisa intukuthelo nomona olokhu uqhamuka ukuze uzithuthukise kunokwenza impilo yomlingani wakho ibe nzima.
4. Ukuzivikela ngokweqile
Ukuthatha indima yomvikeli womlingani wakho nakho kungaba esinye sezizathu zentukuthelo nomona ebudlelwaneni. Usebenza endaweni lapho ucabanga ukuthi umlingani wakho akahlomele ukubhekana nezimo eziyinkimbinkimbi noma awumethembi ukuthi azokwenza okufanele lapho izimo ziba nzima. Ezimweni ezinjalo, ukuqonda ukuthi ungayidlulisela kanjani intukuthelo nomhawu ekuqondeni ukuthi umlingani wakho udinga isikhala kubalulekile.
5. Umncintiswano
Umuzwa wokuncintisana noma ukubangisana nawo ungabangela abantu ukuba babe nomona ngabalingani babo. Lokhu kuvame kakhulu ezimeni lapho bobabili ozakwethu besebenza nabo noma bevela emsebenzini ofanayo. Ukukhula komuntu oyedwa kungashiya omunye ehlushwa umuzwa wokungafaneleki. Lesi ngesinye sezizathu ezivame kakhulu zokucasuka nomona ebudlelwaneni. Kufanele uqaphele ukuthi umlingani wakho ungumuntu onempilo yakhe siqu, ukungazethembi, nemizwa, futhi ukuzama ukuziqhathanisa naye kulahla kokubili ubuntu bakho.
Indlela Yokuguqula Umona Ube Ukukhuthaza?
Umona nentukuthelo ebudlelwaneni kungabalimaza bobabili abalingani ngaphandle kokuthi ungathola indlela yokusebenzisa umona wobudlelwane kanye nentukuthelo njengesisusa. Nawa amathiphu angu-10 asebenzayo ezindlela zokudlulisa intukuthelo yakho nomhawu futhi uziguqule zibe yizici ezikukhuthazayo:
1. Ukwamukela ukuthi unomona
Kungenzeka ukuthi uthole ukukhushulwa esikhundleni noma ibhizinisi lakhe lingase lidlondlobale ngenkathi ulwela ukugcina umsebenzi wakho. Noma kungenzeka ukuthi umlingani wakho unokuphila okuphumelelayo komphakathi kuyilapho ungenabo abangane bangempela - kungaba nezizathu ezimbalwa zomona nentukuthelo ebudlelwaneni.
Ukwamukela lokho okuzwayo kuyisinyathelo sokuqala sokuthuthuka ngendlela efanele. Umsebenzi wobudlelwano uqala lapho umuntu eqaphela futhi amukele lapho entula khona. Kungaleso sikhathi kuphela lapho bengazisebenzela khona futhi baqonde indlela yokudlulisa intukuthelo nomhawu olokhu uvuka kubo.
2. Phatha imizwa yakho
Thola umsuka womzwelo. Kungenzeka ukuthi unesikhwele ngoba isithandwa sakho sesikufezile lokhu obukuhlosile isikhathi eside. Noma ngoba zikwenza uzizwe ungafaneleki. Mhlawumbe, ngisho nangenxa yamademoni akho angaphakathi. Uma uhlose ukusebenzisa umona wobudlelwano njengesisusa, kufanele wenze umsebenzi onzima wokucubungula nokwamukela imizwa yakho.
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3. Ziqinisekise ukuthi ungafika lapho
Isikhathi esiningi umona awubheki ngento ezuzwe umlingani wakho noma izici anazo kodwa imizwa owaba nayo ngenxa yalezi zinto. Ngakho, kanjani ukuguqula umhawu ube ugqozi? Ngokuzikhumbuza ukuthi kunendawo eyanele nendawo eyingqayizivele kulo mhlaba yomuntu ngamunye wethu.
Ukwazi ukuthi ungakwazi ukufeza lokho obeka inhliziyo yakho kukho kungaba umuzwa onika amandla kakhulu futhi okhuthazayo. Isisusa sobudlelwane simayelana nokwenza impilo yenu nobabili ibe ngcono, kodwa iqala ngomzamo wenu ngamunye.
4. Tshela umlingani wakho ngomsebenzi wakhe onzima
Okuwukuphela kwendlela yokuzizwa ukhuthazwa impumelelo yomlingani wakho ukumnika udumo ngethalente lakhe nokusebenza kanzima. Uma umlingani wakho ezuze ingqopha-mlando yomsebenzi, thola enhliziyweni yakho ukuthi ujabule ngempela futhi uziqhenye ngaye esikhundleni sokumehlisa ngamazwi alulazayo njengokuthi 'umphathi wakho kufanele akuthande ngempela' noma 'uyakwazi ngempela ukujabulisa umphathi wakho'.
Kunezindlela eziningi zokubonisa umuntu ukuthi uyamkhathalela futhi uma ufuna ukushintsha ubuhlobo bakho, kufanele uqaphele kakhulu indlela ophatha ngayo umlingani wakho. Esikhundleni sokuba nomona nokumdumaza, ziqhenya ngomlingani wakho futhi ume eceleni kwakhe.
5. Gxila emakhonweni akho
Wonke umuntu muhle kokuthile. Ngakho-ke gxila emandleni akho kunokuba ugcwale umona ngamakhono namakhono omlingani wakho. Ingqikithi yendlela yokuguqula umona ube ugqozi imayelana nokuhambisa imizwa engemihle ukuze uveze umphumela omuhle.
Iyiphi indlela engcono yokwenza lokho kunokusebenzela ekuthuthukiseni amakhono akho. Lokhu kuzosiza ukuthuthukisa ukuzethemba kwakho futhi kukhuphule isimilo sakho. Chitha isikhathi uzisebenzela futhi ube umuntu ongcono.
6. Hamba endleleni yokuzithuthukisa
Umugqa osiliva mayelana nomhawu wobudlelwane ukuthi ungakhanyisa lokho okufunayo ngempela. Esikhundleni sokuklabalasa nokukhuluma kabi ngomunye wakho obalulekile, sebenzisa lokhu kuqonda ukuze ungene endleleni yokuzithuthukisa. Lokhu kuzosusa ukugxila kwakho ekubeni nomuzwa ongemuhle kuye kowakhayo. Nakho-ke!
Ukuze uthole amanye amavidiyo angochwepheshe sicela ubhalisele Isiteshi sethu se-YouTube. Chofoza lapha.
7. Landela ukuhola kwabo
Indlela yokuguqula umhawu ube ugqozi? Qala ngokwamukela ukuthi umlingani wakho empeleni angase abe ngcono kunawe ezintweni ezithile futhi yisona sizathu sokuphumelela kwakhe, ukuthandwa noma ubuntu. Kodwa lokho akusho ukuthi awubalungeli. Usalingana njengegilavu empilweni yabo futhi kufanele ukujabulele lokho.
Ngakho-ke, thatha lesi sizathu sobudlelwano ukuze ulandele isibonelo sabo futhi ulingise indlela yabo yokwenza izinto ukuze uzithuthukise futhi uthuthukise ubuhlobo bakho . Impilo imayelana nokuthola abantu abafanele ukunakekelwa nokufunda kubo njalo.
8. Guqula umona ebudlelwaneni ube ukuncoma
Yiqiniso, lokhu kulula ukukusho kunokukwenza. Uma ugcwele umona, kuba nzima ukubona okuhle komunye umuntu, ingasaphathwa eyokumncoma. Kodwa uma usukwazile ukukunqoba lokho, uzokwazi ukubona ukuthi yini eqhube umlingani wakho ukuthi afinyelele izinhloso zakhe. Ukuguqula umona ube ukuncoma kuyindlela engcono kakhulu yokuzizwa ukhuthazwa impumelelo yomlingani wakho.
9. Bheka amaphutha abo
Ukubheka amaphutha omlingani wakho kusiza kanjani ekusebenziseni isikhwele sobudlelwano njengesisusa, uyabuza? Nokho, ngoba kukusiza ukuba uvume ukuthi nabo banesabelo sabo sokushiyeka nokulinganiselwa. Nokho, umbono lapha akufanele ubaluleke endleleni yakho.
Kufanele uzame ukuthatha umbono ozwelayo ngobuthakathaka babo ukuze wamukele owakho.
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10. Bungaza impumelelo encane onayo
Ukudumazeka ngephutha elincane endleleni yakho kuyindlela eqinisekile yokuphahlazeka nokuwela phansi, futhi lokhu kungakhuphula umona ebudlelwaneni. Kunalokho, gxila empumelelweni encane onayo futhi uyigubhe nomlingani wakho. Lokhu kuzokusiza ukuthi uhlale ugqugquzelekile futhi kuqinise umqondo wokuthi wena nomlingani wakho niyiqembu lenu nobabili.
Ukusebenzisa umona wobudlelwano njengesisusa kungakusiza ekukhululeni umzwelo odlayo, oququdayo ongemuhle futhi ulungise umonakalo odalwe esibophweni sakho nomlingani wakho.
Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa
1. Uwushintsha kanjani umona ube ugqozi?
Ukuze uguqule umona ube ukugqugquzela ubudlelwane kanye nogqozi, kufanele uqaphele ukuthi inkinga isuka kuphi. Ngemuva kwalokho, udinga ukuba nomqondo omuhle futhi uzame ukuzizwa ujabule ngomlingani wakho futhi usebenze ngokuzikhandla ekuthuthukiseni ukuzethemba kwakho.
2. Ngingamsiza kanjani umlingani wami ukuba anqobe umona?
Ngokukhuluma nabo. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukwazisa umlingani wakho ukuthi uyohlale ukhona kuye nokuthi umthanda ngobuqotho. Lokhu kuzobaqinisekisa futhi kubenze bazizwe belondeke kakhudlwana.
3. Ngingayiqeqesha kanjani ingqondo yami ukuthi ingabi nomona?
Chitha isikhathi esiningi uqonda futhi usebenze ngokwakho. Ungakhathazeki ngabanye kanye nempilo yabo. Sebenzisa amandla akho ukubhekana nemizwa yakho, ubudlelwano kanye nezinto ozilibazisa ngazo. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuzazi futhi ube nemigomo engokoqobo yokugwema ukuba nomona nokungazethembi kwabanye.
Imicabango Final
Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi lolu shintsho aluyona into eyenzeka kanye kuphela, kodwa inqubo eqhubekayo. Kuzoba nezingqinamba nezinselele endleleni. Kodwa ngokuhlala uzibophezele ekukhuleni nasekuthuthukisweni kwakho, ungafunda ukusebenzisa amandla ale mizwa futhi uwasebenzise ukukuqhubekisela phambili ohambweni lwakho oluya empumelelweni nasekugcwalisekeni. Zijwayeze ukuzizwela futhi ufune ukwesekwa lapho kudingeka. Abeluleki bethu balapha ukuzokunikeza isiqondiso nokusekelwa xhumana nathi namuhla ukuhlela ukubonisana.
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Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.
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