Abantu abaningi bane-BFF emsebenzini. Uyazi, lowo owabelana naye ngaphakathi uhlekisana naye, uhleba futhi ubuye uphawule ngesimo somphathi. Ngaphandle kokuqaphela, nisondelana kakhulu futhi nichitha usuku lonke nindawonye, nihleba. Uzizwa sengathi uthole isithandwa sakho somphefumulo emsebenzini. I-soulmate ingaba inkosikazi yakho yomsebenzi noma umyeni.
Leli gama laqala ukuvela kudala ngo-1930 encwadini kaFaith Baldwin ethi 'The Office Wife' futhi manje sekuyinkambiso evamile esetshenziswa cishe kuzo zonke izindawo zokusebenza. Ubudlelwano nomuntu osebenza naye bulingisa zonke izingxenye zomshado, ngaphandle kokuxhumana kwezothando noma ezocansi. Hhayi-ke, i-BBC ikubeka kahle, "Imishado mbumbulu ehamba phambili uhlobo lwe-9-5."
Inqobo nje uma usetha imingcele efanele yamakhosikazi omsebenzi, lokhu kuxhumana kwe-platonic kungenza izinsuku ezinzima emsebenzini zibekezeleleke kakhudlwana. Nokho, kulapho imigqa iqala ukufiphala lapho inkinga ingase ibambe khona. Ezimweni ezinjalo, umngane womshado wasemsebenzini angagxambukela kwezinye izici zokuphila kwakho. Uma usushadile noma usebudlelwaneni obuzibophezele, lokhu kungasho izinkinga epharadesi.
Noma kungenjalo, ukuzibandakanya ngokujulile nomkakho wasemsebenzini noma oshade naye emsebenzini kungaba yizindaba ezimbi ngoba ungathola ukuthi ukuguquguquka kobudlelwano bakho ngaphandle kwendawo yokusebenza akusimame isikhathi eside, futhi isibopho sakho singaba nethonya elingenakulungiseka. Uma unomuntu okhethekile empilweni yakho ofaneleka njengomlingani wakho womsebenzi, kubalulekile ukuqiniseka ukuthi awephuli imingcele yobudlelwano bakho.
Ubani Umfazi Womsebenzi?
Okuqukethwe
Abanye abantu bashadelwe ukusebenza bese kuthi abanye abantu babe namakhosikazi omsebenzi. Umlingani wasemsebenzini yigama laseMelika elisetshenziselwa ukubhekisa kumuntu osebenza naye owabelana naye ngesibopho esikhethekile, okufana nobudlelwano phakathi kwendoda nomfazi. Okushiwo unkosikazi womsebenzi kufingqwe kahle kakhulu kule ncazelo - "Ubungani obukhethekile, obuqinile nomuntu osebenza naye obonakala ngokusondelana ngokomzwelo, amazinga aphezulu okudalula nokusekelwa, nokwethembana, ukwethembeka, ukwethembeka, nenhlonipho."
Njengoba kusobala kunkosikazi wasemsebenzini okusho ukuthi, lo muntu akayena unkosikazi wakho wangempela ngokusobala kodwa uwuzakwenu oseduze onobungane obuqinile naye. Uma kunomsebenzi ohlobene nomsebenzi, ukubheja uzowenza nomfazi wakho wasemsebenzini. Kodwa ubudlelwano enabayo abunabo ubulili futhi abunabo ezothando.
Kodwa-ke, uma usebenza eduze kakhulu nomuntu futhi uchitha ingxenye engcono yesikhathi sakho naye, usuku nosuku, le zibalo ingaba nzima. Ukukhangwa abalingani bakho bomsebenzi akuyona into engavamile kodwa kungasho izinkinga hhayi nje ebuhlotsheni bakho nabo kodwa nakwezinye izici zempilo yakho.
Ngokwesibonelo, kwenzekani lapho ukuqaphela ukuthi “Ngicabanga ukuthi ngithandana nomlingani wami wasemsebenzini” kufika ekhaya futhi indawo yakho yokusebenza inenqubomgomo eqinile ekwenqabelayo ubudlelwano bothando emsebenzini? Noma uphikisana phakathi kokuthi “Ngiyamthanda unkosikazi wami wasemsebenzini” nokuthi “Ngiyamthanda umkami wangempela”.
Ukuze ugweme izingibe ezinjalo, kubalulekile ukubeka imingcele efanele yenkosikazi yomsebenzi. Ngalokho, kufanele uqale uvume ukuthi, empeleni, unomuntu osebenza naye, futhi lowo muntu angathatha impilo yakho uma ungabuphathi kahle ubudlelwano.
Izimpawu Zokuthi Unomlingani Womsebenzi
Ukuba nenkosikazi yomsebenzi kungakwenza ujabule futhi ukhiqize kakhudlwana emsebenzini wakho. Isimilo sakho siyakhuphuka futhi sibonakala ekusebenzeni kwakho. Abantu abaningi sebenabalingani basemsebenzini ngaphandle kokuqaphela. Uma wabelana ngesibopho esikhethekile nomuntu othile emsebenzini kusho ukuthi usuvele uwutholile okufanayo kwakho! Bheka lezi zimpawu ukuze wazi ukuthi ubunonkosikazi osebenzayo sonke lesi sikhathi:
- Uba nesidlo sasemini naye nsuku zonke: Awuhlali wedwa udle isidlo sasemini. Umkakho wasemsebenzini ukhona ukukuphelezela zonke izinsuku. Awudingi nokubagcinela isihlalo noma okuphambene nalokho ngoba ihhovisi lonke liyazi ukuthi nobabili nidla ukudla kwenu ndawonye, ngakho abanye ozakwenu bayanimema ukuthi nihlale etafuleni labo noma nihlanganyele kwelakho.
- Unesabelo sakho esifanele samahlaya angaphakathi: Ukuqhulula amahlaya kuphela umkakho wasemsebenzini angaqonda ukuthi kuyi-vibe. Kwesinye isikhathi ukuklolodela nje kwanele ukuthi athole ihlaya. Uyazi ukuthi unomlingani wasemsebenzini lapho ungakwazi ukudlulisa futhi uqonde imilayezo yomunye nomunye ngokubheka nje noma ngokunqekuzisa ikhanda kusuka kuma-cubicles
- Uhlala ekhona ukuze akweseke: Lapho ungcwatshwa umsebenzi omningi, usuke ekhona ukuze akusekele ngokomzwelo nangokwengqondo. Ungahlala uthembele kuye ukuthi enze usuku lwakho lube ngcono. Ukudlula ngisho nosuku olulodwa ehhovisi ngaphandle komngane wakho womshado eduze kwakho kuzwakala njengokudonsa
- Nishiyana izipho phezu kwedeski: Nobabili nithanda ukushiya izimanga ezincane emadeskini omunye nomunye. Lezi zimanga nezipho zihlala zishaya esikhonkosini ngoba nazana njengomhlane wezandla
- Wazi konke: Kungaba usuku lwakho lokuzalwa noma usuku lwakho lomshado, uyakwazi konke. Ungase ukhohlwe nalezi zinsuku kodwa akakukhohlwa futhi angase akukhumbuze. Hhayi nje izikhathi ezibalulekile nemicimbi, uyazi futhi akhumbule nemininingwane emincane kakhulu ngawe - ukuthi ulithanda kanjani ikhofi lakho, ukuthi unamahembe amangaki aluhlaza, idrowa ogcina kulo inqwaba yentuthu eyimfihlo nokunye.
Ukuxhumana nomlingani womsebenzi kungazwakala njengohlelo oluhle lokusekela. Kodwa-ke, yonke imishado inezinkinga zayo, ngisho nezingu-9-5. Ingabe umshado wakho wasemsebenzini nawo uyabhidlika? Ingabe wena nomkakho womsebenzi neqe imingcele yobungcweti futhi nasebenza ekuphileni kwenu siqu? Unaye unkosikazi osebenzayo onezinzuzo? Phela, i imigqa phakathi kobungani obungenacala kanye nenhlansi yocansi ingafiphalisa ngokushesha. Khona-ke, kungase kube isikhathi sokuphinda uhlole i-equation yakho futhi ubeke imingcele ecacile yabafazi bomsebenzi.
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Izimpawu Eziyi-13 Zomsebenzi Unkosikazi Wakho Uthatha Impilo Yakho
Ungase uthembele kakhulu kumuntu oshade naye emsebenzini futhi ungakwazi ukucabanga indawo ngaphandle kwakhe. Ikhula ngendlela yokuthi uzizwe sengathi awukwazi ukusebenza uma umlingani wakho wasemsebenzini engekho. Ungase ungashintshi ngisho nomsebenzi wakho ngenxa yokwesaba ukulahlekelwa umkakho osebenzayo futhi uvumele amathuba angcono adlule.
An indaba yomzwelo ebusweni bakho futhi uyazibuza ukuthi kubalwa yini njengokukopela. Ungasolwa ngokungawunaki ngokwanele umndeni wakho, futhi izinto zingase zibe nzima. “Ngiyamthanda umkami osebenza naye, ungiphatha ngendlela intombi yami engenzi ngayo, kodwa angazi noma naye uzizwa ngendlela efanayo ngami futhi angifuni ukubeka engcupheni enginaye,” kusho uMarwin kumngane wakhe, ngaphandle kokudalula imininingwane yokuthi wayengubani lo muntu ayesebenza naye.
Umngane wakhe wabe esedonsela ukunaka kukaMarwin eqinisweni lokuthi unkosikazi wakhe wasemsebenzini wayephethe impilo yakhe futhi lesi sibalo esiyinkimbinkimbi singamlahlekisela kakhulu. NjengoMarwin, ingabe nawe ubhekene nokukhangwa oshade naye emsebenzini futhi uzama kanzima ukulondoloza imingcele yalobu buhlobo obukhethekile? Naka lawa mafulegi abomvu ukuze uthole impendulo:
1. Ukukhiqiza kwakho kuthatha ijika eliya phansi
Nakuba kuthiwa ukuba nenkosikazi esebenzayo kukhulisa ukukhiqiza, nakho kungaba nomthelela omubi, ikakhulukazi uma uba nemizwa ngomlingani wakho osebenza naye. Uvame ukungawuthandi umsebenzi wakho futhi isisusa sakho sokuya emsebenzini kancane kancane siba ukuchitha isikhathi nokuhleba nomkakho wasemsebenzini. Umphathi wakho uqala ukuhwaqabala noma nini lapho ushiya ideski ngisho nenkomishi yekhofi.
Esinye sezibonakaliso ezinkulu zokukhangwa komlingani emsebenzini ukuthi ukuba nabo kuba yisici esibalulekile sesikhathi sakho emsebenzini. Ukubona umkakho osebenzayo kuba yisona sizathu sokubonisa ukusebenza nsuku zonke. Uma le mizwa ingabuyiselwa noma omunye wenu usebudlelwaneni obuzibophezele, izinto zingaphuma zingalawuleki ngokushesha okukhulu.
2. Iba nomuntu wesifazane osebenza naye
Uma usondela kakhulu kumkakho osebenza naye, imingcele yakho yomuntu siqu neyomsebenzi iqala ukufiphala ngaphandle kokuthi wena uqaphele. Wabelana naye ngezimfihlo zakho ezijulile ucabanga ukuthi ungumuntu omethembayo futhi ubudlelwano bakho naye buphenduka okomuntu siqu. Uqala ukwenza okufanayo futhi ngaphambi kokuthi wazi, awusewona nje ozakwenu.
Lolu hlobo lokusondelana lungaholela ekukhangweni okuqinile nhlangothi zombili, futhi ungase uphele ngisho nasenkosikazini yomsebenzi enezinzuzo zesimo. UJoe no-Amanda, ngokwesibonelo, bagcina ngokuba nobusuku bobulili obuhlasimulisayo, obuvusa ingqondo ngemva kokuhlangana ngaphandle kwehhovisi beyophuza iziphuzo.
Njengoba okwakulindelwe kwakungachazwa ngokucacile, i-equation yabo yashintsha ngokushesha ngemva kwalokho. UJoe akakwazanga ukunyakazisa umuzwa othi “I love my work wife” kanti u-Amanda wayengakakulungeli ukuba nobudlelwano obugcwele.
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3. Uyakudonsa phansi naye
Lapho ozakwethu ababili benengqondo efanayo, bayasizana ukuze benze kangcono emsebenzini. Kodwa uma umkakho osebenza ehluke kakhulu kwesisebenzi senyanga, naye uyakuhudula phansi naye. Ithonya lakhe empilweni yakho lingase likuguqule ube ngumdlali ojwayelekile njengaye.
Lokhu kuyiqiniso ikakhulukazi uma kwenzeka unamathele esigabeni esithi "sothandweni nomuntu engishade naye" noma esakho unkosikazi wasemsebenzini ukhangwa nguwe, njengoba ungase ulungele ukwenza noma yini ukuze umzuze - kungaba ukushaywa umoya ukuze uchithe isikhathi esengeziwe naye noma ukumtholela ukudangala ngezindleko zemisebenzi yakho yobungcweti.
4. Uzivalele kwabanye ubudlelwano
Uzibambele mathupha nonkosikazi wakho wasemsebenzini ukuthi ubudlelwano bakho naye kuphela. Awushiyanga indawo yokuthuthukisa ubudlelwano obunobungane nabanye ozakwenu, ngaleyo ndlela uphazamise ubudlelwano bakho bomsebenzi. Abakuboni njengomngane wabo futhi uma ubacela umusa, bayoba madolonzima ukukubopha.
Ukuxhumana nowakwakho emsebenzini, uma kungaphathwanga ngendlela efanele, kungathatha indawo yakho enkulu nesikhathi, kungashiyi noma iyiphi indawo yokuxhumana nabanye osebenza nabo. Emisebenzini eminingi, lokhu kungaba yisithiyo ekukhuleni kwakho komsebenzi.
5. Izingcingo azihlali ehhovisi
Ubudlelwano bakho nomkakho wasemsebenzini abuhlali buphele eminyango yehhovisi lakho ngemuva kwephuzu. Nobabili niqala ukuba nezingxoxo zomuntu siqu ezikude nendaba nje yasehhovisi. Ngokuqhubeka nobudlelwano bakho naye ngale kwendawo yenu yokusebenza, nobabili neqe umngcele wokuba abangane bomsebenzi kuphela.
Maduze, uzoqala ukubloma ngezikhathi zokuphumula, uma ungakakwenzi. Lokhu kuwuphawu olucacile lokukhangwa komlingani wasemsebenzini okungase kube neqhwa maduze ebudlelwaneni obugcwele ngokuphelele, noma okubi nakakhulu indaba yehhovisi uma omunye wenu esezibophezele. Zibuze, “Ingabe ngikulungele ukuyisa izinto ezingeni elilandelayo nomlingani wami wasemsebenzini?” Uma kungenjalo, sekuyisikhathi sokubeka imingcele ecacile yamakhosikazi omsebenzi.
6. Omunye wenu uqala ukubamba imizwa
Uma ungabeki imithetho eyisisekelo futhi usebenze ngaphakathi kwemingcele yakho, kuzofika isikhathi lapho imizwa izothatha izintambo futhi omunye wenu akhulise imizwa ngomunye. Lapho ubudlelwano bomsebenzi buthatha inguquko yothando nengokomzwelo, izinto ziba nzima. Yilapho okufanele ubheke khona ukuphuma kunkosikazi wakho wasemsebenzini.
USusan wahlangana no-Priya ephathini yasehhovisi lomyeni wakhe futhi wathola ukusondelana kwabo nokusondelana kuphazamisa kakhulu. “Babeqedana imisho, behleka amahlaya angaphakathi, uPriya wayedlala indawo yonke nomyeni wami. isisebenzi somyeni sidlala ngaye ngakho ngokungenamahloni ngokwemvelo iphilisi elibabayo ukuligwinya. Naphezu kokuba umkakhe, ngazizwa njengomuntu wangaphandle ku-equation. Kwangicacela ngalelo langa ukuthi umyeni wami unomfazi osebenzayo futhi unemizwa ngaye.
“Nakuba umyeni wami akushayi mkhuba lokho okwakungikhathaza ngaleso sikhathi, akuphelanga sikhathi esingakanani ngaphambi kokuba ubuhlobo babo bufinyelele esiphethweni sothando.
7. Awunayo impilo yakho
Ngokuhlanganisa impilo yakho yomsebenzi nempilo yakho yomuntu siqu, empeleni awunayo impilo ehlukile eyakho. Uhlala uxabene phakathi komsebenzi, ikhaya kanye nezibopho eziza nakho kokubili. Uma uhlezi uphazamiseka emsebenzini, ngelinye ilanga ungazithola ungcwatshwa izinto ezisilele kakhulu kangangokuthi ungase ungabi naso isikhathi sokwenza okunye.
Uzizwa unamathele emsebenzini wakho yonke indawo. Kube sengathi ukwenza umshado owodwa usebenze bekungenele, manje sekumele ubhekane nokulungisa izinto nomkakho wasemsebenzini.
8. Uncamela ukuchitha isikhathi naye esikhundleni sanoma ubani omunye
Uzithola usukhetha unkosikazi wakho womsebenzi ngaphezu komndeni wakho nabangane kaningi. Uma unikezwa ukukhetha phakathi kokuzijabulisa nomngane wakho, isidlo sakusihlwa nomkakho nezingane, nokubuka ifilimu nomkakho wasemsebenzini, ungakhetha okwakamuva. Wenza lokhu ngoba ubheka inkampani yakhe njengoshintsho oluqabulayo kusukela kokujwayelekile okwenzeka ekuphileni kodwa uyasethemba ukuthi lo muzwa ungase ungahlali unomphela.
Iqiniso lokuthi umlingani wakho wasemsebenzini uthatha indawo yokuqala ngaphezu kokunye okuningi empilweni yakho futhi libonisa ukuthi ubudlelwano bakho abusasekho platonic. Asikho isidingo sokuvala izwi ekhanda lakho elithi “Ngiyakuthanda mkami wasemsebenzini” ngoba uyazi nawe ukuthi leyo mizwa isibambile. Okufanele ukwenze kunalokho ukuthatha isinyathelo emuva futhi uhlole ukuthi ufuna ukuphatha kanjani lobu budlelwano ukuya phambili.
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9. Ihhovisi liba inkundla yempi lapho lihluliwe
Impilo yakho yobungcweti ayisahlanganisi umsebenzi nje. Kufanele futhi ubhekane nomkakho wasemsebenzini, ikakhulukazi uma ubhekene nezinkinga. Abukho ubudlelwano obuhamba kahle futhi uzobhekana nezinkinga ezithile nomkakho osebenza naye. Njengoba wabelana ngobudlelwano bomuntu siqu naye, kufanele wenze okuthile kuye uma kwenzeka izinto ziphendukela eningizimu noma okuphambene nalokho.
Awukwazi ukugxila emsebenzini wakho ngoba nawe kufanele mnake. Uma kwenzeka uwena omuncu, nawe awukwazi ukuzibamba ufuna ukunakwa. Ngeke usakwazi ukukhohlwa izinkinga zakho zasekhaya ngoba unazo nasemsebenzini.
10. Awunaye omunye umuntu ongaya kuye
Impilo yakho ngokuzumayo igxile kunkosikazi wakho womsebenzi. Awusakwazi ukuxhumana nabangane bakho ngenxa yomngane wakho omkhulu osanda kumthola. Iningi lemisebenzi yenu izungeza yena, kusukela ekudleni isidlo sasemini ndawonye kuya ekubukeni imuvi. Ucabanga ukuthi uyisixazululo sayo yonke into, kodwa empeleni, ubavimbele abanye abangani bakho ungahlosile.
Ake uzinike isikhashana ucabange ukuthi yini engenzeka uma oshade naye emsebenzini eshintsha imisebenzi noma eqhubekela phambili ngokomzwelo ngemva kokuthola ukuxhumana okunenjongo nomunye umuntu. Ubungazizwa unesizungu futhi ungedwa. Ngakho-ke, beka futhi ubambelele emingceleni yabafazi bomsebenzi, ukuze angabi yikho konke-futhi-kuphela-konke ukuphila kwakho.
11. Umlingani wakho wangempela uzizwa esongelwa
Umlingani wakho wangempela uzizwa esongelwa ngenxa yobudlelwane bakho obuseduze nomkakho wasemsebenzini. Angase asole ubuhlobo bakho nonkosikazi wakho wasemsebenzini futhi umona nokungazethembi ingangena ebudlelwaneni bakho.
Awu, ngeke umsole! Ukuthi “Umyeni wami unomfazi osebenzayo” noma “Isoka lami liseduze kakhulu nomuntu ashade naye emsebenzini” akuzona izinto ezijabulisayo. Uma umlingani wakho wasemsebenzini eba obaluleke kakhulu kangangokuthi ubudlelwano bakho obuyinhloko buphazamiseka kuleyo akhawunti, nakanjani kuzodala izinkinga. Ngaphandle uma uthatha izinyathelo zokubheka lokhu kuthambekela, ukuxhumana kwakho nowakwakho emsebenzini kungase kuphazamise ubuhlobo bakho nomkakho noma intombi yakho.
12. Niqala ukuthatha udumo ngomsebenzi womunye nomunye
Niyacelana ukuthi anisize ngamaphrojekthi amakhulu? Uyavuma ukusiza futhi ngaphambi kokuthi wazi, wenza konke. Niyafuna ukusizana kodwa ngakolunye uhlangothi, kusabonakala kuhlaba uma munye kuphela othola udumo ngawo wonke lowo msebenzi. Uma kwenzeka lokhu, umuntu owenza umsebenzi ngaphandle kokuhlonishwa ngawo uqala ukuzwa sengathi unikezwa induku emfishane.
Kungaleso sikhathi lapho ubudlelwano bakho nomuntu osebenza naye bungaphazamiseka futhi bube nzima. Yingakho imingcele ibalulekile ngenkathi kugcinwa ubudlelwano bomsebenzi. Kungase kungabi sengathi umncintiswano kodwa kungase kube omunye.
13. Uqala ukwenza njengomfazi wangempela, nawe uthanda indoda
Uma usuqale ukwabelana ngayo yonke imininingwane, imvelo yobudlelwano bakho iqala ukushintsha. Uzoqala ukubuza umbono wakhe ngakho konke. Kusukela ezimpahleni ozikhethayo zokuya emsebenzini kuya kusikhathi ofuna ukuphuma ngaso emsebenzini. Wenza okufanayo. Ngaphambi kokuthi nazi, nobabili nizobe nithonya izinqumo zomunye nomunye ngaphandle komsebenzi futhi. Uziphathisa okwabangani bangempela futhi awazi ukuthi ungakumisa kanjani.
Ukuba nenkosikazi esebenzayo, nakuba kuzuzisa kakhulu, nakho kungaba nemiphumela engemihle. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukubeka imithetho eyisisekelo futhi ubambelele kuyo ukuze ubudlelwano bakho buhlale ngaphakathi kwemingcele yobungcweti. Uma umkakho osebenza ethatha impilo yakho ngaphandle kokushiya indawo yokuthi obunye ubudlelwano buguquke, sekuyisikhathi sokubuqeda. Qaphela ukuthi usondelana nobani emsebenzini ngoba kungaphazamisa isimo sonke sendawo osebenzela kuyo. Khumbula ukuthi uze lapha ukuzokwenza umsebenzi futhi wazi ukuthi yini esengozini!
Ukuqomisana Nosebenza Naye? Nansi Indlela Yokuphatha I-Office Romance
Umnikelo wakho awuhlanganisi inhlangano esiza abantulayo umnikelo. Izovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolwakamuva emzamweni wethu wokusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.
Linda! Ini?? Kungumngane womsebenzi. Konke bekuyitemu elisha kimi esikhundleni sokuthi le webhusayithi ethi "BONOBOLOGY" iqhubeka ingenza ngifunde eminye yemibono emisha engingayazi ngokuphelele kodwa ithakazelisa kakhulu.