Izimpawu Eziyi-11 Zokungathembeki Ebudlelwaneni

Kuwumuzwa ongavamile, akunjalo? Ingabe ku-Google izimpawu zokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni? Abanye bangathi uma izinto sezifike kangaka, sekudlule isikhathi futhi bekumele ngabe kade wahlehla. Kodwa awulilahli ubudlelwano kuze kube ukuphela kwenketho esele. Ufuna ukuqiniseka ukuthi okubonayo ngempela kuyizimpawu zozakwethu okhohlisayo hhayi nje ukungaqondi kahle, okuyishwa. Ukwazi ukuhlukanisa phakathi kokubili kunganquma ikusasa lobuhlobo bakho, futhi ngokwemvelo, lesi yisinqumo ongathanda ukusithatha ngokuhlakanipha. Yingakho ukuqopha izimpawu zokungethembeki ebudlelwaneni kungeyona ihlaya.

Encwadini yabo, Ukugcina Uthando Olutholayo, ababhali uHarville Hendrix noHelen Hunt babhala ukuthi bathole ukuthi cishe u-75-90% wayo yonke imibhangqwana iba nezimpawu zokungathembeki ebuhlotsheni. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ilinganiselwa ku-39% yabo bonke abantu baseMelika abavumile ukuthi bazimisele ukuqamba amanga kubalingani babo. Khona-ke, kungani iningi lethu livame ukungazinaki izimpawu zokukhohlisa ebuhlotsheni futhi senze sengathi konke kulungile?

Ezikhathini eziningi, imibhangqwana ayifuni nje ukuvuma lapho okuthile kungasebenzi, noma ngabe yizinkinga zemali, ukunqanyulwa kwemizwa, ukukhungatheka ngokocansi, noma konke okungenhla. Bangase bakwenzele ukugwema izingxabano noma ngenxa yokwesaba ukufaka ubuhlobo babo engozini ngoba abasafuni ukuba nesizungu. Kodwa ukukhohlisa kuthinta ubudlelwano okubi kakhulu kunanoma iyiphi ingxabano eyake yaba khona. Futhi ukungazivumi izinkinga zakho kumane nje kuwukuzikhohlisa, okugcina kuholela ekungathembekeni okungokomzwelo ebudlelwaneni.

Bonke ubudlelwano bunezikhathi ezinhle nezingezinhle. Umehluko usekutheni uthembekile yini ekuhloleni isimo sobudlelwano ukuze ubuthuthukise, noma uyazikhohlisa ngokukholelwa ukuthi konke kuhamba kahle. Iqiniso liwukuthi ubudlelwano buzoba nzima futhi bube yinselele kwesinye isikhathi. Futhi amanga amabi kakhulu ebudlelwaneni yilawa ozitshela ukuthi ubalekela leli qiniso. Ukuqinisekisa ukuthi awuzitholi ukule mbobo kanogwaja yokuphika, ake sinqume ukuthi ukungathembeki ebudlelwaneni kubukeka kanjani nokuthi kubathinta kanjani isibopho sabashadile.

Yini Efaneleka Njengenkohliso Ebudlelwaneni?

Ukuze siqonde ukuthi ukungathembeki kwenzani ebuhlotsheni, kudingeka sikucacele ukuthi kuyini ngempela. Akuwona wonke amanga anenzondo ngempela. Kodwa kunezinhlobo zokukhohlisa ezicashile ezingaba yingozi ebuhlotsheni. Qaphela ezinye zalezi zimpawu zokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni:

• Ukuqamba amanga ngokuthi yimalini umuntu ayenza
• Ukukopela ngokomzimba kanye ukukopela ngokomzwelo
• Bachitha isikhathi ngasese nentombi/isoka labo lakudala
• Ukufihla ubudlelwano babo bangaphambilini

Manje njengoba usudlule kulezi zibonelo zokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni, kuyacaca ukuthi ukuba nomlingani okhohlisayo kungaba yinto embi kakhulu. Kodwa kumele sicabange nokuthi mhlawumbe yithina ebesikhombisa ukungethembeki ebudlelwaneni. Ezikhathini eziningi sizama ukufihla imizwa nezisusa zethu ngoba sifuna ukuthi abanye basithande kunalokho esifuna ukuba yiqiniso kithi. Kungase kungabi ngamabomu noma ukuzizuzisa wena, kodwa kuyinkohliso nokho futhi imiphumela yokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi inhloso, ihlale mibi.

Kubalulekile ukuqaphela lapha ukuthi ukuqamba amanga ngokungenzi ebudlelwaneni nakho kwenzeka kaningi. Ngokocwaningo, U-73% wabaphenduli asebethandane okungenani unyaka bavumile ukuthi babeqamba amanga kozakwabo ukuze balondoloze ubudlelwano bothando obunempilo.

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Wazi Kanjani Uma Umaqondana Wakho Ekukhohlisa?

Okokuqala, ngokulalelisisa. Lokho ngokuvamile kulula uma usondelene kangako nothile. Uma nobabili senithandane isikhathi eside, cishe senijwayele izindlela zabo, imikhuba, imikhuba ecasulayo kanye nemikhuba yabo. Ngokushesha nje lapho ubona uhlobo oluthile lokuchezuka noma ukuphazamiseka ekuziphatheni kwabo, ungakuthathi kalula. Ngesikhathi esifanayo, ungasheshi ucabange ukuthi umlingani wakho ukukopela bese wehlisa indlu. Babheke kancane. Bahlale bekufihlela ifoni yabo? Zikhona yini ezinye izimpawu ozibonayo zokuthi bayimfihlo uma bethandana?

Enye indlela ongakwazi ngayo ukuthola ukuthi isoka lakho likukhohlisela phansi noma intombi yakho iqamba amanga ngokungenzi ubuhlobo nawe iwukuba izindaba zabo zingahlangani. Lapho umuntu ulele ebudlelwaneni, ukungqubuzana okulandisayo kuyindlela engcono kakhulu yokubamba oqotsheni. Ngokwesibonelo, ngobunye ubusuku bakutshela ngohambo abaluthathe beya e-Bali ngoMashi odlule. Kodwa-ke ukhumbula isikhathi esehlukile lapho besho ukuthi ngonyaka odlule uMashi kwakuwumshado womfowabo futhi abakwazanga ngisho ukuya njengoba babengavunyelwe ukuthatha nosuku olulodwa lokuphumula. Ingabe i-Bali, umshado, noma umsebenzi? Kwenzekani ngempela ngoMashi?

Ukucosha lezi zinkomba kuwukuphela kwendlela yokuthola futhi ubone izimpawu zokukhohlisa ebuhlotsheni. Ngakho hlala uqaphile futhi uwabhekisise. Futhi uma unesizathu sokukholelwa ukuthi uqanjelwa amanga noma izinto seziphelile, khuluma nabo.

Izimpawu Eziyi-11 Zokungathembeki Ebudlelwaneni

Ukungathembeki kungaba nzima ukukubona ebudlelwaneni. Ngezinye izikhathi kungenxa yokuthi awufuni ukukholelwa ukuthi umlingani wakho uyakwazi ukuqamba amanga kuwe, futhi ngezinye izikhathi, ufuna ukumnika inzuzo yokungabaza. Kodwa kunezindlela zokutshela ukuthi umlingani wakho uthembeke kuwe noma cha.

Izimpawu ezisobala kakhulu zokuqamba amanga zingabonwa ngomzimba womuntu, indlela aziphatha ngayo, nesimo sengqondo sakhe. Lokhu kungaba noma yini esuka kumuntu ovala umlomo wakhe lapho eqamba amanga ukuze agweme izingxoxo zomuntu mathupha lapho kungase kudingeke aqambe amanga futhi ancamele ukwenza kanjalo ngezingcingo noma ngemibhalo, noma ukuzivikela futhi athi, “Ngeke ngikutshele.” Usemshadweni lapho umyeni wakho eqamba amanga futhi ekufihlela izinto? Isikhathi sokucabanga ukuthi uyawabona yini amaphethini anjalo ku-.

Kungenzeka futhi ukuthi umlingani wakho kungenzeka ukuthi uqamba amanga ngokungenzi ebudlelwaneni. Bayazi ukuthi liyini iqiniso kodwa banquma ukungakuhlanganisi nawe ukuze baphephise imizwa yakho noma bazisindise engxoxweni engathandeki. Kodwa kusizani lokho ngempela, njengoba kusengamanga ngokobuchwepheshe? Masiqonde lokho kanye nayo yonke enye into ngokudlula kulezi zimpawu zozakwethu okhohlisayo ongakusiza ukuthi uthole ukungathembeki kubudlelwano:

1. Ukuqamba amanga ngezinto ezincane kungenye yezimpawu ezinkulu zokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni

Uma uzizwa njengowakho umlingani unamanga ngezinto ezincane, lokhu kungasho ukuthi baqamba amanga nangezinto ezinkulu. Alikho iphutha ngokufuna ukugcina izimfihlo ezimbalwa ebudlelwaneni ngoba ubudlelwano bungaba mnandi ngaphandle kwemfihlakalo ethile? Kodwa kufanele kube nomkhawulo wokuthi ungagoba kude kangakanani iqiniso egameni lesasasa nemfihlakalo.

Uma ucabanga ukuthi udaba luvela ngokuphindaphindiwe futhi uqala ukuqaphela okuthile okungenangqondo, ungayizibi! Kungenzeka ukuthi umyeni wakho uqamba amanga futhi ukufihlele izinto, noma umkakho noma umlingani wakho akanalo iqiniso kuwe. Ukuhlola lokho kungafani kungakusondeza ekutholeni iqiniso.

2. Ukufihla okuqukethwe kwesikhwama sabo semali noma isikhwama semali

Uma umlingani wakho efihla izinto azigcina esikhwameni sakhe semali noma esikhwameni, njengesitatimende sekhadi lesikweletu noma amanye amadokhumenti, kusho ukuthi unokuthile akufihlayo. Mhlawumbe abazange bathembeke ngezimali zabo noma kunezici zempilo yabo abangafuni wazi ngazo - ukujola mhlawumbe noma ukusebenzelana kwebhizinisi okunethunzi. Kunoma yikuphi, ukungaphumeleli kumlingani wakho ngempahla yakho kuwuphawu lwendoda/umfazi onenkohliso.

3. Ukuba yimfihlo nokufihla ifoni noma ikhompuyutha

Esinye sezibonakaliso ezinkulu zomlingani oqamba amanga imfihlo eyeqile mayelana nemisebenzi yabo yedijithali. Uma kufika ukukopela umuntu, abantu abaningi bathembele kubuchwepheshe ukwenza kanjalo. Uma unothile ongakuvumeli ukuthi usebenzise ifoni noma ikhompuyutha yakhe, kungase kube uphawu oluyisixwayiso lokuthi kukhona akufihlayo. Thatha indaba yomngane wami, isibonelo:

Wayesebudlelwaneni obukhethekile nale ntombazane isikhathi esingaphezu konyaka. Phakathi naso sonke leso sikhathi, wayengavunyelwe ukusebenzisa ucingo lwakhe nakanye. Wayehlale enezaba ezilungile. Ekugcineni, lapho efinyelela ocingweni, wathola amaphrofayili amathathu ahlukene okuthandana ayewasebenzisa kusukela ngaphambi kokuba bahlangane. Izinhlelo zokusebenza zokuqomisana nazo bezingafihlwa kahle kangako. Kungaka ngobumfihlo bedijithali, eh?

4. Ukuba novalo ngesihloko sokwethembeka kungaba wuphawu lokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni

Olunye lwezimpawu eziveza owesilisa noma owesifazane onenkohliso wukungakhululeki okuzwakalayo mayelana nesihloko sokwethembeka. Uma umlingani wakho ebonakala ethukile noma nini lapho uveza ukwethembeka noma ukukopela esimweni sobudlelwane bakho, kungase kube ukubonakaliswa konembeza wabo onecala.

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5. Ukuxoxa izindaba ezingahlangani yizimpawu ezinkulu zokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni

Ngakho-ke ubonile ukuthi izindaba abakutshela zona mayelana nobudlelwano babo bangaphambilini ziyimidwebo noma azihambisani. Ukulandisa kwabo kwezenzakalo zesikhathi esidlule akuhlanganisi noma kwenza umqondo. Abantu abaqamba amanga badinga ukuzivikela njalo noma bathethelele izenzo zabo. Ngokwenza kanjalo, bavame ukwaluka izaba okungenzeka ukuthi kude kakhulu noma kunemininingwane eminingi ngokweqile.

Isibonelo esivame kakhulu salokhu yilapho umuntu eqhubeka engeza amagama amasha noma imininingwane ngakho konke ukuphinda kulandiswe ngomcimbi/ukuhlangenwe nakho. Ungase ubabuze into elula njengokuthi babekuphi ngesikhathi esithile. Esikhundleni sempendulo eqondile, bazokunikeza yonke indaba yokuthi babambeke kanjani emsebenzini noma bahlangane nomngane wakudala. Babuze umbuzo ofanayo ezinsukwini ezimbalwa kamuva futhi uzothola abalingisi abengeziwe nemicimbi yengezwe endabeni. Uma lokho kungezona izimpawu zokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni, asazi ukuthi kuyini.

6. Ukukhombisa i-zero accountability

Lapho bebanjwa amanga, bashintsha ngokushesha indaba noma bazame ukusola omunye esikhundleni sokuxolisa futhi baphumele obala. Uma othile eqamba amanga kuwe, ngokuvamile uzogwema ukuphendula imibuzo ngokuqondile futhi azame ukushintsha isihloko ngokushesha ngangokunokwenzeka. Ukuziphatha okugwemayo kuwuphawu lomuntu okuqamba amanga. Naka kakhulu ulimi lomzimba wabo futhi uqaphele indlela abaphendula ngayo. Uzoqaphela ukuthi abalokothi babheke ngamehlo.

Ngokufanayo, enye yezimpawu zokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni yizimpendulo ezingacacile. Uzakwethu ongathembekile akasoze aphendula noma yimuphi umbuzo ombuzayo futhi uzozigwema ngobuchule izinkinga ozivezayo. Ukwenza kanjalo kuba lula kakhulu ngemuva kwesikrini. Kodwa uma ulalelisisa, ungase ukwazi ukuqaphela ukuthi intombi yakho noma isoka lakho liqamba amanga ngombhalo. Uma ubabiza, bangavele babaleke engxoxweni ngokwabelana nge-meme noma i-reel, noma okubi nakakhulu, bavele banyamalale amahora ambalwa.

7. Ukusebenzisa amacala kuyizimpawu ezicashile zokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni

Futhi kungase kubhekwe ngokwedlulele ukuziphatha okunobuthi. Bakwenza uzizwe unecala ngokubabiza ngokuziphatha kwabo kokungathembeki. Okudabukisayo ukuthi ugcina usubanika ipasi njengoba ungafuni ukubonakala “njengomuntu omubi” kulesi simo bese ukhetha ukuqhubekela phambili kuso. Kodwa lokhu kuwuphawu olukhulu lokuba nomlingani okhohlisayo. Bakwenza ube necala ngokushalazela amaphutha abo ukuze bangabhekana nemiphumela yezenzo zabo.

Ngangithandana nale ntombazane – asiyibize ngo-Stacey – futhi ngayibona imikhuba yayo yokuqamba amanga ngempilo yayo siqu. Lapho ngiqala ukumbuza ngakho, waxolisa. Kodwa lapho lesi simiso siqhubeka, ngabhekana naye ngokugcizelela ngokwengeziwe. Ekupheleni kwengxoxo, ngandlela-thile wayesengenze ngaqiniseka ukuthi yimina enganginephutha ngokumbuza. Emasontweni ambalwa alandelayo, ngakhuluma ngale ndaba ngezindlela ezibucayi kakhulu. Nokho, yimina engangigcina ngizizwa nginecala ngokukhuluma ngale ndaba njalo. Ngathatha ikhono lami futhi ngaqeda ubuhlobo. Phela, uhambo olufanayo lwecala lusebenza izikhathi eziningi kuphela.

8. Ukugcina isimiso sabo esivamile siyimfihlo

Ukwazi izinqubo zomunye nomunye, izikhathi, noma okujwayelekile “Yini ophezu kwayo?” umlayezo uza nendawo yobudlelwano. Kuvamile ukuthi uhlale wazi ukuthi umlingani wakho ukuphi nganoma yisiphi isikhathi. Eqinisweni, imibhangqwana eminingi ithanda kanjalo futhi ikhetha ukwazisa abalingani babo ngalezi zinto. Kodwa enye yezimpawu zokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni ukuthi umlingani wakho ubalekela lolu hlobo lokungafihli.

Ngeke wazi ukuthi i-SO yakho ikuphi nganoma yisiphi isikhathi. Bangaba nje ukuchitha isikhathi nabangane abaseduze noma ukujaha esinye isithakazelo sothando. Ngoba konke okwaziyo, kungenzeka ukuthi bajola nomunye umuntu kodwa basenawe ngoba besaba ukulahlekelwa nguwe. Iqiniso liwukuthi awukwazi ukuthi umlingani wakho wenzani usuku lonke. Kodwa uma bengakhululekile ngokuba nesithakazelo esincane esimisweni sabo esivamile, khona-ke bangase baphile ukuphila okumbaxa-mbili.

9. Ukusebenzisa “imihlangano” njengezaba zesitoko

Futhi sikhathele ukuyizwa. “Imihlangano” yabo ibonakala iqhamuke ngokuthanda kwabo. "Ngisemhlanganweni" bavele basuse ulimi lwabo cishe yonke imibuzo. Kungenzeka ukuthi umlingani wakho angaba matasa, kodwa othile onesithakazelo sangempela kuwe uzothola isikhathi sokuba khona futhi ahlanganyele empilweni yakho. Okubaluleke nakakhulu, bazochaza ukuthi kungani bengakwazi ukuba nawe ngesikhathi esithile kunokuba basebenzise izaba “zomhlangano” okwesigidi.

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10. Izimpawu ezisobala zokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni? Izigameko ezedlule ziyadalulwa

Uthola sebekuqambele amanga. Yiziphi ezinye izibonelo zokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni ozidingayo ngempela? Uma udalule izimpawu zomlingani wakho oqamba amanga ebudlelwaneni bakho, kusho ukuthi umlingani wakho uzophinde aqambe amanga kuwe. Uma bebengathembekile kuwe kuze kube yilapho uzitholela iqiniso ngokwakho futhi ubhekane nabo, asikho isizathu sokucabanga ukuthi ngeke bangene ekukhohliseni okucashile ukuya phambili. Ngabe ngempela uzokwakha kanjani kabusha ukwethembana ebudlelwaneni obunjalo?

11. Unethumbu elinamandla

Uzwa sengathi kukhona okuvaliwe kodwa awukwazi ukubeka umunwe wakho kukho. I-intuition yakho ingenye yezimpawu ezinamandla kakhulu zokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni futhi into engcono kakhulu ongayenza ezimweni ezinjalo ukuthembela kukho. Uma kukhona okungahambi kahle, cishe kunjalo. Umzimba wakho unezindlela zokuxhumana nawe ngemizwa yakho engokwemvelo. Balalele futhi wenze ngokufanele.

Ukwethembana kuyingxenye ebalulekile yanoma yibuphi ubudlelwano futhi kuba yisisulu sokuqala lapho inkohliso ingena phakathi kombhangqwana. Kungaba nzima ukusho ukuthi umlingani wakho ubeqamba amanga noma cha, futhi kube nzima nakakhulu ukukwamukela. Kodwa imiphumela yokungathembeki ebuhlotsheni yonakalisa kakhulu ukuba ishaywe indiva. Nakuba kungeyona yonke imiphumela yokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni engenakuguqulwa, ukuyishaya indiva kwenza izinto zibe zimbi nakakhulu.

Izindlela Ezi-3 Ukungathembeki Kuthinta Ubudlelwano

Ukuqamba amanga njalo noma ukuba yimfihlo ebudlelwaneni ngeke kukusize ngalutho, kuyaqondakala lokho. Akugcini nje ngokubangela ukuwohloka kokuthembana ebudlelwaneni, kodwa futhi kuholela ekukhulumisaneni okungakhululekile. Uma uqanjwe amanga noma umlingani wakho enomkhuba wokukufihlela izinto, ungase uzithole usungabaza yonke into abayenzayo. Lokho kwenza ubudlelwano bungasebenzi, kude nendawo ephephile, evikelekile obekumele ibe yiyo. Ake sibhekisise umthelela wokukhohlisa ebudlelwaneni ukuze sikusize uqonde ukuthi kungani ungalokothi ukuthathe kalula:

1. Awusakwazi ukuthi ubakholwe nini

Uma mhlawumbe usebudlelwaneni nomuntu onamanga we-pathological noma uthandana nomuntu ovame ukwenza izimo nezindaba, uzolahlekelwa imizwa yakho futhi ukuxhumana kwengqondo nabo. Uma uzwa sengathi umlingani wakho akaqondi kahle kuwe, izinto zizoba nzima futhi ungase uzizwe udelelekile kakhulu. Lokhu kuzokwenza kube yinselelo enkulu kuwena ukuba sebudlelwaneni njengoba ungazi ukuthi baqamba amanga nini noma cha.

URoss, umfundi waseBoston, wasitshela ngentombi yakhe entsha, uCharlotte, nokuthambekela kwayo kokuqamba amanga. Wathi, “Ngangimthanda ngempela ngakho ngazama ukushalazela wonke amanga ayengitshela wona. Ayevame ukufundeka kalula kodwa ngavele ngawashaya indiva, ngacabanga ukuthi wavele wakwenza ngenxa yomkhuba wakhe. Kodwa ngemva kwephuzu, angibange ngisakubekezelela lokho. Kwangikhathaza kakhulu ngoba nganginomuzwa wokuthi ngangingeke ngisakwazi ukuxhumana naye.

2. Ukuzizwa untula inhlonipho

Uthando aluyona yodwa into egcina ubuhlobo buqinile. Ngokuvamile kuyingxube ecebile yokwethembana, ububele, ukuxhumana, kanye nenhlonipho. Ngaphandle kwenhlonipho abukho ubudlelwano, yingakho noma nini ubudlelwano buba nokubhidlika, abelaphi nongoti ukuthuthukisa inhlonipho ebudlelwaneni kuqala bese sisebenza kwezinye izinto.

Kodwa lapho umuntu ehlala eqanjelwa amanga, akusekho mbuzo wenhlonipho. Ngisho nokuqamba amanga ngokweqa, kungenza umuntu azizwe edelelekile futhi enganakekelwa. Lapho inhlonipho idilika, kukhona kuphela ubudlelwano obude obungahlala buqinile.

3. Umqambimanga ugcina eseziqambela amanga naye

Futhi yilapho izinto ziba nzima kakhulu. Bonke ubudlelwano buqala ukuzizwa njengemvula yemizwa nokukhungatheka ngoba akukho okuzwakala kungokoqobo. Hhayi nakulowo oqamba amanga ngempela. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi baphika iqiniso ngokuqondile, benza izimo ezintsha, noma bakha ubunjalo obusha, izinto nakanjani zizokwehla futhi ngokushesha. Kuleli qophelo, ukwethembana kuphelile, ukudideka nokungakhululeki sekungene, futhi uthando lwakho lulenga nje ngentambo ebuthaka.

Uma uhlangabezana nanoma yiziphi izimpawu ezingenhla zokungathembeki ebudlelwaneni, khumbula ukuthi akukephuzi kakhulu ukwenza. Ungathatha izinyathelo zokubhekana nenkinga futhi uzibophezele kabusha kumlingani wakho. Siyazi ukuthi ukungathembeki kwenzani ebudlelwaneni futhi sixoxile ngezimpawu ezivame kakhulu. Kodwa uma uneminye imibuzo mayelana nokuthi inkohliso ibuthinta kanjani ubudlelwano nokuthi yini ongayenza ukuze wenze ubudlelwano bakho buqine futhi buthembeke, uchwepheshe wezempilo yengqondo angakwazi ukukunikeza ukucaciseleka okukhulu kokuthi ungazulazula kanjani kulesi simo. Uma ufuna usizo, abeluleki abanamakhono nabanelayisense bavuliwe Iphaneli yeBonobology zilapha kuwe.

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Umnikelo wakho awuhlanganisi inhlangano esiza abantulayo umnikelo. Izovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolwakamuva emzamweni wethu wokusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.

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