Izimpawu Eziyi-10 Zokuthi Umyeni Wakho Unendaba Engokomzwelo

Ubona izimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakho unobudlelwane obungokomzwelo? Nakuba kungase kucindezele, kubalulekile ukuthi uqinisekise okufanayo ngaphambi kokugxumela kunoma yiziphi iziphetho ezinkulu. Ukukopela nokungathembeki kuyanda kakhulu kulezi zinsuku. Kodwa ngokwelulekwa nangendlela efanele, kungenzeka ukuzulazula kulezi zithiyo.

Ukwanda okugcwele kwezindaba ezithinta imizwa kuwuphawu lokuthi iningi labashadikazi kunokuthile elishodayo emishadweni yabo. Impumelelo yanoma ibuphi ubuhlobo ayixhomekile nje kuphela ekusondeleni ngokomzimba kodwa nasekusekelweni ngokomzwelo nasekuzinzeni. Nokho, ekuphileni kwanamuhla okuphithizelayo, imibhangqwana eshadile iyalikhohlwa leli qiniso elibalulekile, okubangela ukuba ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo kuba isenzakalo esivamile.

Izibalo zibonisa ukuthi imibhangqwana eneminyaka engama-20 cishe izowela ekukopeleni ngokomzwelo, okuyinto empeleni engabhekwa njengokukopela kwangempela. Indawo yokusebenza iyindawo yokuzalela cishe ama-60% ezindaba, kungaba ngokomzimba noma ngokomzwelo.

Iyini Indaba Yomzwelo?

Kunzima ngempela ukuhlukanisa phakathi kwezindaba zomzimba nezemizwa ngoba ezokuqala zingase ziholele kokwesibili kanye nokwesibili. Kalula nje, uthando olungokomzwelo lungaba ubudlelwano obuseduze phakathi kwabantu ababili obungahileli ukusondelana ngokomzimba kodwa obusekelwe ekuxhumaneni okusuka enhliziyweni kuya enhliziyweni. Lokhu ngeke kubonakale kungalungile kwabaningi ngoba emshadweni kukhona ukulindela okungashiwongo kokuthi bobabili abashadile baphendukela komunye nomunye ukuze bathole ukwesekwa ngokomzwelo esikhundleni somuntu wangaphandle. Imibhangqwana eshadile kufanele ibe lapho komunye nomunye ngezikhathi ezinhle noma ezimbi. Yingakho izindaba ezingokomzwelo nazo zibhekwa 'njengokukhohlisa' emshadweni.

Uma ufuna ukwazi ukuthi izindaba ezithinta imizwa ziqala kanjani noma ufuna ukwazi okwengeziwe mayelana ne-psychology yokukopela ngokomzwelo, nanka amazwibela ezigaba okuvame ukudlula kuzo udaba oluthinta imizwa-

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• Ukuchitha isikhathi esiningi: Ngemva kwalokho, baqala ukubloma ndawonye futhi babelane ngayo yonke imininingwane ngempilo yabo bodwa
• Ukunganaki impilo yabo yomshado: Kamuva, baqala ukugxila kulobu buhlobo obusanda kwakhiwa futhi baqale ukuhlola impilo yabo yomshado
• Ukutshala imali ngokuphelele ebuhlotsheni obusha: Ekugcineni, batshalwa imali kulobu budlelwano, okungaba nemiphumela emibi empilweni yabo yomshado

Ingabe kuvamile ukubona izimpawu zokuthandana ngokomzwelo emsebenzini?

Igama elithi 'Common' liyigama elifanele ukuchaza ukuvama kokubona izimpawu zothando olungokomzwelo emsebenzini. Njengoba abalingani noma abalingani bechitha isikhathi esihle ndawonye ngezimpelasonto kuphela, indawo yokusebenza iba yindawo efanele yokuthandana njengoba osebenza nabo bebophana ngezinselele zomsebenzi, inhlebo kanye nemibuthano. Yebo, uthando lwasehhovisi luvame kakhulu kunalokho ocabanga.

Indawo yokusebenza ijwayele ukuhlalisana ngokwedlulele futhi umuntu uthola ukuhlangana nabantu abaningi abahlukene. Ngokuhambisana nalokho, kuyacindezela futhi ukuba nomuntu ongabelana naye ngokungezwani okuhlobene nomsebenzi, izinkumbulo nemibono kuzizwa kuzuzisa. Lo muntu ngokuvamile akuyena uphathina ngoba nithola ukuhlangana kusihlwa kuphela. Engeza imithwalo yemfanelo yomndeni ku-equation futhi nethuba lokwabelana ngosuku liphuma ngefasitela.

Kodwa, njengabantu, sidinga ukuzizwa sithandwa, saziswa futhi sinakekelwa, nsuku zonke, ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ngakho-ke uphendukela kulo muntu ukuze wabelane ngenhlebo yehhovisi elincane, futhi kancane kancane, ngaphandle kwakho nokuqaphela, uba yingxenye ebalulekile yokuphila kwakho.

Kwesinye isikhathi, uqala ukujabulela indawo osebenzela kuyo ngenxa yalo muntu oyedwa futhi ungazi nokuthi unendaba ethinta inhliziyo. Nokho, imingcele akufanele yeqiwe futhi ubudlelwano bomsebenzi kufanele buhlale bufanelekile. Kunokuba zibe isizinda sezindaba ezingokomzwelo phakathi kwabashadile, izindawo zokusebenza kufanele zibe isisekelo sobungane obuhlala njalo nobuqotho.

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Izimpawu Eziyi-10 Zokuthi Umyeni Unendaba Engokomzwelo

Njengoba kushiwo ngaphambili, indaba engokomzwelo ihlobene nokuxhumana kwezinhliziyo ezimbili. Lokhu kusho ukuthi uma umuntu esengenile kuyo, uthola kunzima ukuyiyeka. Ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo kuwubuqili, kunzima ukukuqonda nokuxazulula. Ngenxa yalokhu, izindaba zemizwa ziba nonya futhi ziyaphazamisa. Njengoba lolu hlobo lokukopela luholela ekwephuleni ukusekelwa nokwethembana phakathi kwemibhangqwana eshadile, empeleni lungase lubulale isibopho somshado.

Nakuba kujabulisa futhi kuvusa amadlingozi, ukungathembeki ngokomzwelo kusabalwa 'njengokukopela'. Kungenzeka futhi ukuthi umlingani wakho uhileleke othandweni oluthinta imizwa futhi akazi nakwazi. Angase abe umlutha walo muntu oyedwa, futhi angase acabange ngaso sonke isiqephu njengendaba 'yokudlala ngothando okungenangozi' ngenxa yokuthi isici somzimba asikahileleki. Uma ubona izimpawu zokuthandana ngokomzwelo kumlingani wakho, khona-ke nalu uhlu lokuhlola lwezimpawu ezithile ezizokusiza wenze umqondo wakho.

1. Imfihlo igubuzela ubudlelwano benu

Ufuna izimpawu ukuthi umyeni wakho unendaba engokomzwelo? Bese uyibhekisise lena eduze. Ingabe nobabili nigcina izimfihlo eziningi komunye nomunye? Ingabe umyeni wakho uya ngokuya egadwa ocingweni lwakhe?

Lokhu kusho ukuthi umyeni wakho uthatha izinyathelo zokulondoloza ubumfihlo bakhe, okuyinto angakaze ayenze ngaphambili. Uzoyeka ukwabelana nawe ngemininingwane yosuku lwakhe, uzokufihlela ucingo lwakhe nama-password, nokunye. Angase aphume ekamelweni ukuze athathe izingcingo futhi angabonakala ebhala umlayezo ebusuku. Lezi zimpawu zokungezwani ngokomzwelo zingadabukisa kodwa azikwazi ukushalazelwa.

2. Ukukugxeka noma ukukubeka phansi kuba umkhuba wakhe ojwayelekile

Kusebudlelwaneni obunempilo lapho bobabili abalingani begxekana futhi benze kanjalo ukuze basizane bathuthuke futhi babe izinguqulo ezingcono zabo. Nokho, kukhona umugqa omuhle lapho. Lapho ukugxekwa kuba njalo, khona-ke kukhona okungalungile ngokuqinisekile.

Ingabe uhlala ekukhathaza ngendlela okhuluma ngayo? Ingabe uvame ukuzonda iningi lezingubo ozigqokayo futhi agxeke imikhuba yakho yokuthenga ? Uma lokhu kuyinto entsha ayenza naye, khona-ke kungaba olunye lwezimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakhe uthandana ngokomzwelo.

3. Umyeni wakho uba umlutha ngokweqile ezinkundleni zokuxhumana

Kungazelelwe, uma umyeni wakho eqala ukusebenzisa izinhlelo zokusebenza zezokuxhumana ezifana ne-Facebook, i-Instagram, ne-Snapchat ngokungapheli, khona-ke unezizathu zokumngabaza. Umqondo walokhu kungaba ukuthi angasebenzisa izinkundla zokuxhumana ukuze ahlale exhumana nomunye umuntu ngaso sonke isikhathi.

Mhlawumbe ubengenandaba kangako noMessenger phambilini kodwa manje isitikha sakhe esiluhlaza 'se-inthanethi' esiluhlaza sibonakala sihlala njalo. Ukhuluma nobani?

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4. Usuku lwakhe alupheli engashongo omunye umuntu

Ungazi kanjani ukuthi umyeni wakho unendaba engokomzwelo? Cabangela lesi simo esilandelayo. Ngakho-ke nina nobabili nikhuluma ngokuthile futhi umyeni wakho ulokhu esho ukuthi umngane wakhe wenze into enhle kakhulu noma ebukeka kahle. Angase angalivezi igama labo kodwa futhi ngeke akwazi ukuyeka ukukhuluma ngalowo muntu.

Ngokusobala, kunomuntu omusha ekuphileni kwakhe amthanda ngokuphelele. Kodwa futhi ngeke akutshele konke ngabo noma akwazise kuwena. Lezi zimpawu zokuthandana ngokomzwelo zisezingeni eliphezulu phakathi kwamadoda asanda kuqala ukukopela amakhosikazi awo.

5. Uba ukuzivikela kakhulu uma kuziwa komunye umuntu

Ufuna izimpawu ukuthi umyeni unendaba engokomzwelo? Bese uhlolela lena. Uma kwenzeka wena noma omunye umuntu ekhuluma kabi ngomunye umuntu, umyeni wakho uzothatha uhlangothi lwakhe futhi amvikele ngokwengeziwe. Angase aze afinyelele ezingeni lokumsiza izikhathi ezingaphezu kwesisodwa, nangaphezu kwalokho okudingekayo.

Yilokhu uSheila, umninikhaya umyeni wakhe uNelson ayemkhohlisa, asitshela khona. Wathi, “Umyeni wami uthandana nowesifazane wasemsebenzini, uNicole. Njalo lapho ngikhulisa uNicole, umyeni wami ubonakala emvikela kakhulu.”

6. Ukukuqhathanisa nomunye umuntu ngaphandle kokucabanga

Njengomlingani, ulindele ukuthi umyeni wakho akwamukele ngokuphelele futhi akuthande ngalokho oyikho. Nokho, uma uthola ukuthi umyeni wakho uyehluleka ukwenza kanjalo futhi elokhu ekuqhathanisa nomunye umuntu, khona-ke kuyimbangela yokukhathazeka. Izimpawu zokukopela ezingokomzwelo ezinjalo ziyavuvukala ebuhlotsheni bakho.

Akugcini nje ngokukwehlisa isithunzi kodwa futhi kuyisiphakamiso sokuthi umshado wakho usezinkingeni . Kusobala ukuthi umyeni wakho akesabi ukukuhlambalaza, okusho ukuthi ubuhlobo bakhe obunye bukhula bube bucayi.

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7. Umyeni wakho uthuthukisa izithakazelo zamanoveli ngemuva kwakho

Ngezimpawu ezinjalo umyeni uba nendaba engokomzwelo, nakanjani unesizathu sokukhathazeka. Mhlawumbe wayekujabulela ukuchitha amaSonto eziphumulele ekhaya. Kusenjalo, usenomkhuba omusha wokudlala igalofu njalo ngeSonto ekuseni. Uma lokhu kubonakala kungathandeki kuye, lokhu kufanele kukunikeze isexwayiso kusengaphambili sokuthi umyeni wakho uthuthukisa izithakazelo zamanoveli ngeziphakamiso zomunye umuntu.

8. Imibono yakhe ishintsha kakhulu

Esinye sezibonakaliso ezinkulu zokukopela ngokomzwelo uma ngokuzumayo enemibono emisha futhi ethatha izinto ayejwayele ukuzizwa ngokuhlukile ngazo. Njengomuntu osondelene kakhulu nomyeni wakho, ngokusobala ubuyoyazi imibono nemibono yakhe ezintweni eziningi.

Noma iluphi ushintsho olukhulu emibonweni yakhe ngokuqinisekile luyoba ngenxa yethonya elingafanele lomunye umuntu ekuphileni kwakhe. Uletha imibono emisha etafuleni ayamukelayo empilweni yakhe.

9. Ukubukeka komyeni wakho kuyashintsha

U-Lauren wayesole ukuthi uRicardo wayekopela isikhathi eside. Wabona ukuthi manje usenaka kakhulu ukubukeka kwakhe nezimpahla zakhe. Wathi, “Umyeni wami uhileleke ngokomzwelo, akunakuphikwa. Ngokuphazima kweso uthole iqoqo elisha lama-cologne nezicathulo. Wayengenandaba kangako nalezi zinto ekuqaleni. Nakanjani uzama ukujabulisa othile.

Ngaleyo ndlela, uzobona nomyeni wakho eshintsha isitayela sakhe sokugqoka futhi ezama amathiphu amasha okuzilungisa . Angase anake kakhulu ukubukeka kwakhe futhi angazama nokwehlisa lawo makhilogremu engeziwe. Izimpawu ezinjalo zothando lwemizwa kunzima ukuzigwema.

10. Ukusondelana ngokomzimba phakathi kwenu nobabili kuba yinto engasho lutho

Esinye sezibonakaliso ezinkulu ukuthi umyeni wakho unobudlelwane obungokomzwelo yilokhu. Ingabe imizamo yakho yokusondelana nomyeni wakho iyehluleka nsuku zonke? Ingabe uvame ukuchitha isikhathi esiningi exhumeke ku-TV noma kumakhalekhukhwini wakhe? Ingabe uyangabaza ukusondelana nawe? Uma yebo, khona-ke maningi amathuba okuthi uthandana nothile ngokomzwelo.

Isikhathi lapho unomuzwa wokuthi ubudlelwano bakho bungase bube isisulu sokuthandana ngokomzwelo, kufanele uhlale uzolile. Sondela kumyeni wakho futhi uzame ukukulungisa njengabantu ababili abanengqondo. Uze unikeze umyeni wakho ithuba lokungabaza ngoba nguye umuntu okhethe ukuchitha impilo yakho yonke naye.

Ungalahli ithemba futhi ulwele ukusindisa umshado wakho entweni elimazayo njengendaba engokomzwelo. Naphezu kwazo zonke lezi zimpawu zokuthandana ngokomzwelo, kubalulekile ukuthi uzwe ngaphambi kokuthatha izinyathelo ezinqala.

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Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.