Aroha Anō? 10 Ngā Wehi Tūturu mō te Aroha i Muri i te Wehenga

Porohia te aroha

Kei te wehi koe kei aroha koe i muri i te wehenga? Ehara i te mea ngāwari te mamae o te wehenga, ahakoa te roa o te marena. He tino uaua te wehi i muri i te wehenga ki te kimi aroha. He raruraru kare ā-roto ngā momo wehenga katoa, engari ko te kimi aroha i muri i te wehenga te mea tino uaua. I muri i te marena, me te kore e whakaaro ki te uru atu ki te rapu hoa, ka akiakihia koe kia hoki anō ki te mahi. Kei te wehi koe ki te whakaipoipo anō i muri i te mamae o te wehenga?

He pono, he ngoikore hoki te wehi i muri i te wehenga. Kei te ngana koe ki te whai tūranga anō ki te kēmu whakaipoipo, engari kei roto pea i tō ngākau me tō hinengaro he arai hou ki te aroha. He tino tawhiti rawa te āhua o te "Happy ever after" me te kore e taea te whakapono ina pakaru te marena i whakaaro koe ka mau tonu. Me pēhea rā e whakapono tonu ai tō ngākau me tō wairua ki te aroha, i muri i te kitenga i te hinganga?

Ā, koinei te pūtake o ngā momo wehi katoa i muri i te wehenga e pā ana ki te kimi aroha. Tērā pea kua waiho koe e ō wheako o mua he whara, ā, kei te mataku koe kei mamae anō koe. Kei te āwangawanga koe ki te whakapau kaha me te whanaungatanga piripono. Tērā pea kei te mataku koe kei noho takakau koe i muri i te wehenga, kei te āwangawanga rānei kei tere rawa te uru atu ki ngā whanaungatanga. Ko ngā wehi whakaipoipo i muri i te wehenga ka taea te pupuri i a koe ki roto i te ringa o aua mataku. Kāore koe i te tino mohio ka kitea anō e koe te aroha. Ahakoa he mea noa te tūpato mō te aroha i te wā e whai ake nei, ko te taka ki roto i te kore tumanako ka nui ake te mamae.

10 Ngā Wehi Tūturu mō te Aroha i muri i te Wehenga

Ripanga o Ihirangi

He tika te mataku mō te aroha i muri i te wehenga. Ina whakaipoipo koe i tētahi, he mea whakamataku tonu. Kī tonu koe i te tumanako, kei roto i tō hinengaro ngā mataku mai i ngā mea ka tupu ki te āhua o ngā mea ka puta. Kāore tēnā e rerekē i muri i te wehenga. Inaa, ko te mataku i muri i te wehenga, ko te mataku kei kitea te aroha i muri i te wehenga, ka nui ake te pono me te hiranga. Hei tirohanga pai ake, me titiro tātou ki ngā mataku tino pono e 10 mō te aroha i muri i te wehenga:

1. Te wehi kei noho takakau anō i muri i te whakarere

He haurua kōrua o tētahi tokorua mō te wā roa. I tīmata kōrua ki te whakaaro me te titiro ki ngā mea katoa mai i te tirohanga a te tokorua, ā, ināianei me whakaatu anō kōrua i a kōrua anō hei tangata takakau. Ka rua ake te uaua o te wehi kei whakakahoretia i muri i te wehenga. Kua hoki mai anō te whakaaroaro me te whakaaroaro mō ngā raruraru takakau katoa.

He nui te mataku o te tangata ki te noho takakau i muri i te whakarere, ā, tērā pea ka kore rātou e hiahia ki te whakarere. Tērā pea ka tīmata te whakaaro ko te noho takakau te tikanga o te mokemoke anake ki a koe. Tērā pea ko tēnei mataku i muri i te whakarere te take e peke atu ai koe ki roto i te ngā whanaungatanga whakaora tere rawa i te wā e taea ai e koe te whakapau wā ki te whakaora i ō patunga tawhito.

Heoi anō, me tīmata koe ki te titiro ki te noho takakau hei whai wāhitanga ki te noho i runga i ō ake tikanga. Mā tēnei whakaaro, ka piki ake ō tupono ki te hanga whanaungatanga hauora ake me te tangata e haere tahi ana koe ā muri ake nei.

2. Te wehi ki te aroha ki a koe anō i muri i te whakarere

Ko te patunga tuatahi i muri i te wehenga nui ko te mauahara ki a koe anō. Ka tino heke tō aroha ki a koe anō, nō reira ko te wero ko te kaha ki te aroha koe ia koe anō. Kātahi anō ka kore he tangata hei whakapumau i a koe mō tētahi wā, e arohaina ana koe i roto i te aroha. Ko te aroha ki a koe anō te wero tuatahi!

Ehara i te mea he mea noa iho tēnei kare ā-roto o te hauātanga me te wehi i muri i te wehenga, engari e tumanakohia ana hoki i roto i te hunga kua takakau noa iho nei i muri i tētahi hononga roa kua piripono. Me whakapau kaha koe ki te kimi huarahi hei aroha ki a koe anō. Rapua te tautoko mai i ētahi atu hononga nui o tō ao. Ka taea e ō hoa aroha te whakakī i taua āputa me te whakaatu ki a koe he aha koe i tika ai kia arohaina.

3. Te wehi kei ngoikore

Ko te wehi kei whara anō tetahi o ngā arai nui me wikitoria e te tangata i muri i te whakarere me te mamae o te ngākau. He mea whakamarie te haumaru o tētahi whanaungatanga pumau mō te wā roa. He uaua te wehi i muri i te whakarere kei puta koe ki waho, kei kitea, kei rite hoki mō te tūponotanga ka whara koe.

He pai pea te titiro ki te ngoikore, kaua hei ngoikore, engari hei kaha. E kī ana a Brene Brown i roto i tētahi kōrero whakamiharo a Ted Talk e kīia nei Te Mana o te Whakaraerae, e miriona ngā tirohanga, ko te ngoikore te mea e homai ana ki a tātou te mana. Mā te ngoikore ka homai he mana ki a tātou ki te hono atu me te kimi i te aroha.

Ko te wehi kei whakakorea koe i muri i te whakarere, tera pea koe e akiaki ana i a koe ki roto i te āhua o te kore mahi. Engari ko te ako ki te whakaoho i te ngoikore i roto i ō whanaungatanga ka āwhina i a koe ki te whakarērea tēnei wehi. He mea whakamataku te whakahoki mai i ngā wahi pakaru o roto i a koe, kātahi ka whakatuwhera anō i te huarahi ki aua wahi mō te ao whakaipoipo me te ao aroha, engari ehara i te mea kāore e taea.

4. Te wehi kei tukua iho

Ina hinga te whanaungatanga i whakaarohia kia roa mō te ao katoa, he maha ngā wā ka tangohia tō whakapono katoa ki a ia. nga mutunga hari me te tumanako kei te nui te aroha me te whakahoahoa i tēnei ao. Ka nui ake tō whakapae ki ngā kaupapa a te tangata ina ngana ana rātou ki te whakatata atu ki a koe, ā, he maha ngā wā ka ngaro tō tumanako ki te kimi anō i te aroha, i tētahi whanaungatanga pumau rānei.

He mea nui kia maumahara ko te tumanako me te whakapono te mea e pupuri ana i tō tātou hinengaro pai i roto i te aroaro o te koretake me te kino e karapoti nei i a tātou. Pērā anō hoki mō ngā whanaungatanga me te aroha.

5. Te wehi o te whakapau kaha i muri i te whakarere

I muri i te wehenga, he pono, kei reira ngā whara. Ko ngā pae whakaipoipo, ko te pēhanga rānei kia noho tahi anō me tētahi atu, ka taea te kukume i te tangata kua whakarerea ki raro. Ko te hokinga mai ki te ao whakaipoipo ka tīmata hei wheako whakamataku, kāore hoki he hua, ā, ka tūpato koe, ka ruarua rānei koe ki te kimi i tētahi hoa hototahi me ngā hiahia e rite ana.

Te wehi ki te piripono I muri i te wehenga, tera pea e pā ana ki a koe anō me te tangata kē atu. Tērā pea ka mataku koe ki te whakaae, ā, ka ruarua hoki koe ki te whakaae a te tangata kē atu. Engari kāore he huarahi kē atu hei karo i tēnā. Me ako koe ki te whakawhirinaki ki te tukanga. Heoi anō, ka tupu noa iho tēnei i te āhua tūturu, ā, i muri mai. Ka whakaae koe i te wā e tika ana. Kaua tēnei e aukati i a koe ki te rapu aroha.

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6. Te wehi i muri i te whakarere: He pai rawa atu rānei ahau?

E ai ki tā tātou i rongo ai mai i te tamarikitanga, ina pakaru tetahi taonga takaro, ka honoa anō e tātou engari ka kitea tonu te pakaru. Kaua e ngakaukore. Tērā pea kāore i te tino pakari te taonga takaro i te tīmatanga. Engari, ki te whakaaro koe ko koe taua taonga takaro, kaua! Ehara koe i te taonga takaro, ā, kāore hoki koe i whati. He tangata uaua koe, ā, ka taea e koe te ako mai i ngā wheako kino.

Mā ngā "kapiti" koe e homai te āhua me te hanga i a koe ko wai koe. Kei a koe te kaha ki te whakaora. Tērā pea ka puta tonu te mamae i ētahi wā, ā, ka ārahi pea koe ki te pātai i tō whakapono ki a koe anō. Engari kia maumahara koe ehara ko koe anake te tangata kua pakaru. He tohu hauora anō hoki ngā whara kia pai ake ai tō whanaungatanga e whai ake nei.

7. Te wehi ki te whakawhirinaki anō ki tētahi

Kāore he aha te aroha mēnā kāore he whakawhirinaki me te whakaute, e ai ki te kōrero. Tērā pea ka kitea e koe te hononga, ngā hiahia ōrite, te hototahitanga me ngā mea katoa, engari me pēhea te whakawhirinaki? I muri i te tūtakitanga ki tētahi tinihanga, ko te kare ā-roto kotahi ka tino memeha, ā, me hanga anō e koe mai i te tīmatanga ka whakawhirinaki ki tētahi heke mai harikoa, ki te pai o ētahi atu me koe anō hoki.

Tērā pea ka kitea e koe te hononga, ngā hiahia ōrite, te hototahitanga me ngā mea katoa, engari me pēhea te whakawhirinaki? Ki te kitea e koe he uaua ki te whakawhirinaki anō ki tētahi, he pai pea te toro atu ki tētahi kaiwhakaora hinengaro hei whakatau i ēnei kare ā-roto. Nō roto i a koe ēnei raruraru nā ō wheako o mua, ā, he mea nui kia tirotirohia e koe, kia whakatauria hoki. He mea nui tēnei mō tō hauora hinengaro, ehara i te mea mō tō oranga aroha anake.

8. Te wehi ki te whai tūponotanga: He waimarie, he pōuri rānei te wā tuarua

Mā tō hinengaro arorau koe e kī atu kua whati ngā ngākau o te katoa i ētahi wā. He tūponotanga tonu te waimarie mō te wā tuarua. Ahakoa te āhua nei kei te pai ngā tūponotanga ki a koe, ka ruarua koe nā te mea ka kī atu tō pūmanawa. Ko tō pūmanawa ake ko te tiaki i a koe anō i ngā whara me ngā mamae katoa.

Me whakawhirinaki koe ki tō ake tukanga whakaora hei whakamātau anō i tēnei mea aroha katoa. Ehara i te mea ngāwari te aroha. Engari he ngāwari anō hoki! He tino taea te kimi i te kotahi engari he tokomaha ngā tāngata he rite ō rātou hiahia me ō rātou uara. Heoi anō, he tini ngā tāngata o tēnei ao e rapu ana kia arohaina, kia hoatu hoki te aroha hei utu. Kia tumanako!

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9. Te wehi o te whanaungatanga piripono i muri i te whakarere

Ehara i te mea ko te wairua anake, ko te ngākau anake rānei; e mōhio ana tātou katoa ehara i te mea he tika anake ngā matea o te tinana engari he rite tonu te hiranga. Ko te moe tāne, ko te whakaaro rānei ki te moe tāne i muri tonu i te wehenga, tera pea he tino rerekē, he whakamā hoki nā te mea ko te noho tahanga he whakaatu anō i tētahi momo ngoikore ki tētahi atu tangata hou.

Ko tēnei wehi i muri i te whakarere, te wehi o te whanaungatanga, he āwangawanga tino mārama. Ehara i te mea ngāwari te whakawhirinaki ki tētahi hei whakapuaki i ōu āhuatanga tino piripono. Whakapono ka kitea e koe tētahi e mārama ana ki tēnei āwangawanga. Mā te tangata tika, ka taea e koe te whakapuaki i tō hiahia kia ata haere.

10. Te wehi ki te harikoa

Āe, i tika tāu i rongo ai. I muri i te wehenga, i te wehenga rānei, ka uru pea te tangata ki te hara koretake mō te harikoa anō. E whakaaro ana tātou me noho pōuri tātou, me whakahengia rānei tātou mō te harikoa. Tērā pea nā ngā tamariki, nā te hapori, nā te tangata anō rānei tēnei wehi o te whakahe.

Ka tīmata hoki tātou ki te noho humarie i roto i te tūranga o te patunga i roto i te hinengaro. Tērā pea ka puta te wehi i muri i te whakarere nā te hiahia ki te haerenga hara tō tātou hoa mō tō tātou āhua pōuri. Ko te mataku kei hoki anō ki te aroha he tohu pea tēnei o te wehi ki te whakamutu i tētahi upoko me te tīmata i tētahi mea hou. Tērā pea ko te wehi ki te tuku, ki te muru hara me te neke whakamua.

I whakaahuahia e ngā Kariki o mua te aroha ehara i te kare ā-roto kotahi engari he maha ngā momo: eros/erotic, philia/friendship, pragma/domestic, ludus/playful, agape/universal me philautia/self-esteem. E mataku ana koe kei kī mai i muri i te wehenga kāore e taea e koe te whakahoki mai i aua kare ā-roto katoa. Kāore rānei? Koinei te tino kaupapa.

Engari e ai ki te kōrero rongonui a Ko te Ruānuku o Oz E mea ana, "E kore rawa ngā ngākau e whai hua kia kore rā anō e taea te whati." Kia maumahara, i te mea kei te ora tonu, kei reira tonu te āheinga, ā, kei reira tonu te aroha! Nō reira, whakarērea atu aua mataku o te aroha i muri i te wehenga, ā, hoki atu ki te aroha ki a koe anō mō ōu āhua katoa – engari kaua e aro ki ngā āhuatanga kino. Ka nui āu mahi.

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