Me pēhea te pupuri i te hiahia o te tāne? 20 Ngā Huarahi hei pupuri i a ia kia mau tonu te hiahia

Me pēhea te pupuri i te hiahia o tētahi tāne? Ka whakamahara mai ki ahau ngā kupu o te waiata a Ali Gatie, "Mai i taku tūtakitanga ki a koe. Kāore e taea e au te wareware i a koe. Kei te oma koe i runga i taku hinengaro." Engari me pēhea e taea ai e koe te noho kore utu i roto i te hinengaro o tētahi i tēnei wā he iti noa te aro, he iti noa te manawanui, ā, he maha ngā kōwhiringa?

I runga i ēnei āhuatanga katoa, me mōhio koe me pēhea te pupuri i te hiahia o tētahi tāne ki a koe. Hei tīmatanga, whiriwhiria tētahi e hiahia ana ki te mōhio ki a koe, kaua hei hoa noa, ā, e mārama ana kāore e taea te aro atu ki ngā kare ā-roto. Kaua e whai i tētahi tāne e takaro ana i ngā kēmu hinengaro. Whiriwhiria tētahi e mārama ana, e pono ana hoki ki āna whakaaro. He māmā ake te kimi huarahi hei kukume i tētahi tāne ki a koe ina ko te tāne i whiriwhiria e koe te mea tika māu.

20 Ngā Huarahi Hei Pupuri i te Hiahia o te Tāne ki a Koe

Tuatahi, kia maumahara, kaua te pupuri i tōna hiahia kia waiho hei kaupapa matua o tō ao. Nā te mea, ki te mea kua mahia e koe ngā mea katoa e taea ana e koe, ā, kāore e angitu, ka pōuri koe. Nā, me aha koe? Whakamātauria ōu kaha katoa, koinā te mea e tika ana. Engari kia maumahara ki tēnei, ehara ia i te whakamātautau mō tō uara. Kaua tana whakamana e waiho hei pūtake mō ō whakaaro mōu ake. Kaua tō whanaungatanga ki a koe anō e pāngia e ēnei raruraru katoa. Kia mau tonu tēnei ki roto i tō hinengaro, anei ētahi tohutohu hei pupuri i te hiahia o te tāne ki a koe.

1. Kaua e whakatuwhera tonu

Kei te whakaaro koe me pēhea te pupuri i tōna hiahia, tika? Āe, kia ata noho. Kāore ngā kiriata tawhito e hē ana ina kī mai kia ata haere tātou. Ko te mea ngaro me te hiahia ki te mōhio koia te mea e pupuri ana i a tātou kia haere tonu. Wetekina tō ataahua i ia taahiraa. Kia tipu haere i runga i a ia.

Me rite ia ki te waina pai e inu ana, kaua ki ngā inu tequila e pā wawe mai ana ki a ia, e hopu ohorere ana i a ia, ā, he nui rawa atu hoki mōna kia kaua e taea e ia te whakahaere i te wā kotahi. Ko te tere haere ko tētahi o ngā mea ngā hapa whanaungatanga tino noa ka taea e koe te karo. Ka whakamate i te ngahau, ehara i te mea māna anake, engari māu anō hoki. Nō reira, e ai ki te waiata a Russ, "Eke puhoi, āe āe..."

2. Kaua e mangere

Ki te whakaaro koe kua ngaro tōna hiahia, tera pea nā te mea i tawhiti koe i mua, ā, i hanga tawhiti kore i te whakaaro. Kua tae ki te wā ki te whakahoki mai i te mura inaianei. Ki te hiahia koe ki te aro mai ki a ia, kia rangona hoki tōna aro, kia arohaina hoki koe, me whakarongo anō hoki koe ki tō hoa. Kāore e taea e ngā whanaungatanga e tipu ake ana te noho taha kotahi.

Koinei te mea e whakamānawa ai, e whakakorikori ai hoki te whakaipoipo. Me noho te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero whai hua hei pokapū o tō oranga aroha. Ina kōrero mai tō hoa ki a koe i tētahi mea, kaua e whakarongo noa ki a ia. Kia aro nui atu ki a ia. Anei ētahi atu huarahi hei whakakore i te kore aro ki tō whanaungatanga:

• Hangaia katoa ngā momo whanaungatanga tae atu ki te hinengaro me te kare ā-roto 
• Hoatu he wāhi whaiaro ki a ia i ngā wā katoa e hiahiatia ana
• Kaua e ngaro te hiahia, kaua hoki e māharahara ina kōrero nui ana ia mō tētahi mea e pai ana ki a ia
• Pātai atu i ngā pātai whai muri i te mutunga o te kōrero hei whakaatu i a ia kei reira koe i roto i tō hinengaro 

3. KĀORE nui ki te ngakaukore

Ki te hiahia koe kia mau tonu te hiahia o tētahi ki a koe, kia mōhio koe he tino whakarihariha te ngakaukore. Whakaarohia. Nōnahea koe i hiahia ai ki te haere ki tētahi wā ki te whakatau i tētahi tangata e tuku ana i ō karere i te ao, i te pō, ā, e whakaatu ana i te nui o te hiahia, ahakoa kāore koe i te mōhio ki a koe? Kaua e whakapehapeha, engari kaua e piripono. Kaua e tatari tonu ki tāna whakautu. Haere. Whakapono mai ki ahau, ka kitea te wairua o te aroha ki a koe anō me te harikoa o te kiri. Anō, ehara tēnei i te kī ka wareware koe ki a ia, ka takaro hoki i ngā kēmu mana. Ko te tikanga anake kaua e wātea ki a ia i ngā wā katoa, ā, ka ngaro tō mahi, ō hoa, me ō hiahia.

He mahinga tōu. Tērā pea ko te haere ki tētahi akomanga kanikani, te haere ki ngā kauhau, te mahi kaha rānei i tō mahi. Kaua e waiho aua mahi ki te taha, kaua hoki e ngaro tō aro nā te mea kei roto ia i tō ao. Ehara ia i te pokapū o tō ao. He mea whakamīharo noa iho ia, ko te keke kua whai kiko kē tō ao. 

Te pānui e pā ana: Me pēhea te mōhio mēnā kei te hiahia tētahi tāne ki a koe, he hoa noa iho rānei – Te whakamārama

4. Uia nga paatai

Ko tētahi o ngā huarahi hei kukume i te tangata ki a koe ko te neke atu i tō āhua tūturu. Kaua e kōrero mōu ake. Kia mōhio ki ngā āhuatanga o ia kāore e mōhiotia whānuitia ana e te tangata. Kia pai tō whakarongo. Kaua e rūpahu noa i tō hiahia, engari me whakarongo pono ki te tangata. Mena kua roa kōrua e kōrero ana, ā, kua mutu ngā kōrero mata, ka taea e kōrua te tīmata ki te mōhio ki ōna whakaaro. Kāore he huarahi hē, he huarahi tika rānei ki te pātai i ēnei momo pātai. Anei ētahi tauira:

• He aha ētahi o ōu ngākau nui?
• E whakapono ana koe ki te Atua?/He aha te mea i meinga ai koe hei ateita?
• He aha te mea e tino hari ai koe?

5. Kia kaua e whakamā ki a koe anō

Ki te hiahia koe kia roa te whanaungatanga, kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakaari, ki te mau rānei i te kanohi hei pupuri i te hiahia o tō hoa aroha ki a koe. Kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakauru i a koe ki roto i tētahi āhua e whakaaro ana koe ka pai ia ki a koe, nā te mea ka aroha te tangata tika ki a koe mō tō āhua. Inaa, kāore he mea e ataahua ake ana i te hunga pono, e māia ana, e ngoikore ana. Nō reira, ahakoa he aha koe i roto, whakaaturia ki waho. 

6. Kia pono

He tino whakararuraru ngā kēmu hinengaro. Me pēhea te pupuri i tōna hiahia? Kaua e tākaro kēmu, inā koa mēnā he whanaungatanga hou. Ka taea e koe te toa i tētahi tāne mā tō mohiotanga kare ā-roto me tō pono. He mea whakararuraru tēnā, ā, ko tētahi o ngā mea nui. ngā āhuatanga o te wahine rangatiraKia tino pono ki tāu e hiahia ana mai i a ia me ngā mea katoa i pā ki a koe. Kāore koe e hiahia ki te teka, ki te huna, ki te tinihanga rānei kia mau tonu ai tōna aro. Heoi, ki te mea kei te pono koe mō tō hītori, kaua e huri i a ia hei kaiwhakaora hinengaro.  

He wahine māia koe, nō reira, ki te whakahē koe i a ia, me whakaatu noa ki a ia. Ko te wairua e whakamanawareka ana i te tangata me te whakamoemiti teka ehara i te huarahi pai hei kukume i te tangata ki a koe. Ki te whakaaro koe ka taea e ia te pai ake me ana pūkenga whakarongo, me kōrero mārire ki a ia āu e hiahia ana. Me whakamahi noa i ō kupu kia tika. He nui ake ngā mea ka taea te whakatutuki mā te kōrero mārire.

7. Whakamoemititia ia

Mena kei roto koe i tētahi hononga tawhiti, tera pea ka memeha haere te aroha me te aroha. Tērā pea ka whakaaro koe me pēhea te pupuri i te hiahia o tētahi tāne me te kore e moe tahi me ia, ina koa he mea nui te taatai ​​mō kōrua. Ka taea tonu e koe te pupuri i te mura o te aroha me te mea kia mau tonu tōna hiahia ki te hononga, mā te mihi atu ki a ia i ngā wā katoa.

He reka, he ātaahua hoki ētahi nga mihi mo nga tane ngā mea ka taea e koe te whakamātau ko:

• "Ehara ianei koe i te tangata mātau rawa atu kua kite ahau!"
• "He pai ki ahau tō manaaki i ō hoa"
• "He kakara pai tōu. Kei te hiahia ahau ki te mitimiti i a koe"
• "He ātaahua tō āhua. Kei te miharo ahau he aha tō āhua mēnā kāore he kākahu e mau ana"
• "He pai ki ahau te āhua o tō kata"

He rite tonu te pai o ngā tāne ki ngā mihi ki ngā wāhine. Ka piki ake te whakaaro nui ki a rātou anō, te whakaaro nui ki a rātou anō, me te whakapono ki a rātou anō. He mea whakamiharo ngā mihi, inā koa mēnā kei roto koe i tētahi hononga hou. Mā tēnei ka mōhio te tāne kāore koe e ngana ana ki te whakamātau. Engari, kei te tuwhera koe, kei te tika, kei te pono, ā, kei te whai kia roa te hononga. 

8. Tohaina ngā ihirangi whakamere

He maha ngā wā ka ahua uaua ngā kōrerorero. Nō reira, he mea whakahauora te hononga i runga i ngā ihirangi pai. Ka taea e koe te whakauru i a ia ki te ao o Janelle Monáe, ā, ka taea e ia te whakauru i a koe ki te ao o Khalid. Ka taea e koe te whakauru i a ia ki te katakata a Ashley Gavin, ā, ka taea e ia te whakauru i a koe ki tana kohinga kiriata o te ao e arohaina ana.

Ka taea hoki e koe te whakahihiri i ngā mea whakamere kua hangaia e koe. He mea pea nā kōrua i tuhi, i tuhi, i waiata, i peita rānei. He ataata kanikani mai i tō tamarikitanga pea. Ko te tikanga, kia mōhio ia ki tana hiahia, kia mōhio hoki ia ki tāu ake. He mea rangatira te whakahihiri i te toi. 

Te pānui e pā ana: 20 Ngā Huarahi Tino Ataahua Hei Whakapuaki i ō Kare ā-roto ki te Tangata e Arohaina Ana e Koe

9. Hononga i te tamarikitanga

He nui te āwhina a te tamarikitanga o te tangata ki te mārama ki a rātou. Nā te mea, ko te whanaungatanga e pārekareka ana ki a tātou ko te hua o te whanaungatanga i waenganui i a tātou me ō tātou mātua, me ō tātou mātua rānei. Kia mōhio koe ki tōna āhua. He aha ia i pēnei ai? He aha te mea e kore ai ia e māia? He aha ngā mea e raru ana ia? Tērā pea ēnei... ngā pātai whakamā ki te pātai ki tētahi tāne, engari tukua ia kia whakapuaki mai i ōna whakaaro ki a koe, kia noho ngoikore hoki i a koe. 

He rerekē ngā raruraru o ia tangata, o ia tangata. Kaua e hoatu he tohutohu kāore i tonoa. Tukua kia puta mai ngā mea huna katoa. Heoi anō, kua whakaakona ngā tāne ki te pehi i ō rātou kare ā-roto. I te mutunga, ko tā rātou anake e hiahia ana he tangata hei tuku i a rātou kia rongo i ō rātou kare ā-roto katoa.

He whakamahara ki ahau ki te kiriata I mua o te putanga mai o te Ra, ko te kaupapa matua o tēnei he kōrerorero i waenganui i te tokorua. He wāhanga kei reira a Celine e kī ana ki a Jesse, "Ki taku whakaaro mēnā he momo Atua, kāore i roto i tētahi o tātou, ehara i a koe, i ahau rānei, engari ko tēnei wāhi iti noa iho i waenganui. Mēnā he momo makutu kei roto i tēnei ao, me noho ko te ngana ki te mārama ki tētahi, ki te whakapuaki i tētahi mea. E mōhio ana ahau, he tata kore e taea te angitu … engari ko wai e māharahara ana? Ko te whakautu me noho ko te ngana."

10. Pātai atu ki a ia tōna whakaaro

Mā tēnei ka mōhio ia he mea nui ia. Kāore koe e pai ki te mau ia i tō hāte tino pai i tētahi rā? Ina tono rānei ia i tāu kai reka tino pai? Waihoki, ka taea e koe te pātai ki a ia "He aha taku e kakahu ai ki te pāti e whai ake nei?" (me te hoatu ki a ia ētahi kōwhiringa hei whiriwhiri) me "Ko ēhea o ēnei pikitia me tuku e au ki Instagram?" He mea nui ki a ia. Kaua e tukua ia kia whai ngā take hei kī, "Kāore au e arohaina ana "kāore rānei i te uaratia." 

11. Kia mōhio ia ehara ko ia anake

A ako i whakahaerehia ki ngā ākonga kāreti i roto i ngā whanaungatanga roa i mua i te marena, hei whakatū hononga i waenga i te hae me te piripono o te whanaungatanga. I tautuhia e tēnei rangahau ngā āhuatanga pai me ngā āhuatanga kino o te hae aroha, me te wehewehe mārama i te hae kare ā-roto/tauhohe hei "pai" me te hae hinengaro/whakapae hei "kino". 

"He pai te iti o te hae i roto i te whanaungatanga hauora," te kī a te tohunga tātai tangata koiora me te kaiako whanaungatanga a Helen Fisher, Ph.D., kaituhi o Te Take E Aroha Ana Tatou"Ka ara ake koe. Ina whakamaharatia koe he ātaahua tō hoa, ā, he waimarie koe, ka taea e koe te whakaoho kia pai ake [me] kia hoa ake. Heoi, ina roa te hae, ina ngoikore, ā, ina kitea whānuitia - āe, koinā te wā ka noho hei raruraru. E kore rawa te tangata tika e tuku i te hae kia whakangaro i tētahi whanaungatanga pai."

Nō reira, kaua e mataku ki te whakahua mārire i ngā tāngata e tuku karere ana ki a koe, e kōrero ana rānei ki a koe i te ao tūturu. Kāore he kino o te whakamahi ngā huarahi mohio hei whakapataritari i a iaHeoi anō, me mōhio ia he mea nui te noho tahi me koe, ā, kaua ia e noho mārire, e whakahawea rānei ki a koe.

12. Kia tūpato, kia kaha hoki te mahi

I ētahi wā, tikina ia, ka haria ki tētahi rā whakahihiri. Tukua ia kia noho ki te nohoanga pāhihi i ētahi wā, kia ārahi hoki. Nā te mea, ehara i te mea māna te mahi i ngā mahi katoa o te whakarite i tētahi rā i ngā wā katoa.

Whakaohokia ia ki ngā putiputi me ngā tiakarete i te mahi. Whakatuwheratia te tatau mōna. Tōia te tūru mōna. Puritia āna putea hokohoko māna. Kei hea te tuhituhi ko ia te tangata hei mahi i ēnei mea katoa? Ehara i te mea ko te mana o te momo tāne anake te mana toa, e mōhio ana koe.

13. Whakahaerehia te whare moenga

Kua tino pai rawa atu tō mahi i ēnei rā hei hoa rangatira? Mēnā koinā te āhua, kāore he mea miharo i tīmata ai ia ki te whakaaro kia kite i tētahi atu. Kua tae ki te wā kia aroha anō ia ki a koe mā te whakahaere i te rūma moe. Kia māia koe, mā tēnei ka hoki mai te wā o te marena hou. Kei raro nei ētahi mea ka taea e koe te mahi hei whakamere ake i tō oranga moepuku:  

• Puta mai i tō rohe whakamarie ka whakamātau i ngā mea rerekē
• Pātai atu ki a ia he aha ngā mea e pai ana ki a ia, ā, tūhuratia ana moemoeā.
• Waihoki, ka kōrerotia e koe ō wawata me ō hiahia ki a ia
• Whakamātauria ngā mahi whakaari, ngā taonga takaro ira tangata rānei 

Te pānui e pā ana: Āhea te mutunga o te wā marena? 15 ngā tohu hei tirotiro māu

14. Me pēhea te pupuri i te hiahia o te tāne? Te takaro

Kia mahara ki te āhua o Barbara i roto i te Don JonHe tohunga ia ki te mahi whakawai. Kia mau tonu te hiahia o tētahi ki a koe mā te whakatoi i a ia. Kāore e hē te whakamātau i te wā roa. Me whakapau kaha ia kia whiwhi. Koinei tētahi o ngā mea ngāwari ka taea e koe te mahi hei whakaoho i tōna kare ā-roto ki a koe.

Nō reira kaua e whakamā ki te takaro. ako e kōrero ana mō ngā whanonga takaro e tohu ana i te kukume tinana pērā i te whakawhiti waewae, te hiki i ngā ringa, te piko whakamua, te tākaro ki ngā mea, te menemene mārire, te kata me te whakatoi, me ētahi atu.

15. Te whakawhetai me te whakamana

Me pēhea te pupuri i te hiahia o te tāne me te kore e moe tahi me ia? Whakaaturia tō whakawhetai mō ngā mea iti e mahia ana e ia. Kei te noho tātou i tētahi ao tino uaua. Mā te tirotiro haere i ngā pāpāho pāpori ka whakaaro tātou he ngoikore tātou. Nō reira, kaua e wareware ki te mātakitaki me te maioha ki ngā mea pai i roto i a ia. Ko te whakamana i tō hoa rangatira tētahi o ngā mea nui. ngā huarahi hei whakawhanake i te haumaru hinengaro i roto i tō whanaungatanga.

Me kī noa atu: “E hoa, kua kite ahau kei te kaha tō mahi i tāu kaupapa. Nui atu tōku whakahīhī ki a koe.” Me kī atu rānei “Kāore koe e tunu pinepine ana, engari he tino reka tēnei spaghetti. He tino pai te tunu kai!”

16. Kia mōhio ki ōna hoa

He mea nui ki a ia ōna hoa, nō reira he mea pai ki a ia kia kite i a kōrua e noho tahi ana. Kāore ianei e tino miharo ana te ngākau ina whakaae tō hoa pai ki tāu hoa? Pērā anō hoki ia. Ki te whakaute koe i ōna hoa, ā, e maioha ana ki tō rātou tūranga i roto i tōna ao, ka mōhio ia ki te nui o tō whakaaro ki a ia.

Te pānui e pā ana: 13 Ngā Tohu Whakatenatena mō te Hononga Pai

17. Tuhia ngā ngoikoretanga ki a rātou anō

Kāore e taea e ngā whanaungatanga aroha te ora tonu me te kore e whakakitea ōu āhua tūturu ki tō hoa. Koia te mea nui kia whakapuakihia ō ngoikoretanga me ō āwangawanga ki te tāne e arohaina ana e koe. Ki te kore koe e pera, e kore rawa ia e mōhio ki a koe tūturu. Whakanuia tō whanaungatanga mā te whakaoho i te ngoikore, kia whakaatu ai ki a ia kei te tino whakawhirinaki koe ki a ia.

Hei tāpiri atu ki tēnā, ka taea e koe te whakatenatena i a ia kia pērā anō hoki. Waihangatia he taiao haumaru mōna kia whakapuaki i ōna whakaaro, kia tukua iho hoki tōna tiaki. Kaua e akiaki i a ia, kaua hoki e whakamahi i ēnei ngoikoretanga ki a ia. Kia noho hei pou tokomanawa mā te tuku tautoko kare ā-roto, me te noho noa ki tōna taha. 

18. Kia kaha tonu te kōrero i ngā karere kuputuhi 

Me pēhea te pupuri i tōna hiahia? Whakarei ake i tō taumata kēmu tuku karereKi te kore e taea e kōrua te noho tahi kanohi ki te kanohi nā te pukumahi o ngā mahi, me waiho kia whakamere mā te tuku karere kuputuhi. Ka taea e kōrua te takaro ki a ia me te tuku karere kuputuhi kino ki a ia hei whakanui ake i te werawera. Tukuna atu he pikitia ātaahua māu. He pikitia ātaahua rānei. He tino pai te mahi a ngā mea e rua! 

19. Tunua māna 

Ahakoa kua whakatau koe kia āta haere, ka taea tonu e koe te mahi i ngā mea hei whakaoho i tōna aroha ki a koe. Ko tētahi o ngā mea ka taea e koe ko te tunu i ētahi kai reka māna. Kāore e hiahiatia kia waiho hei kai tino pai māna. Tunua noa te mea e mōhio ana koe ki te whakarite pai, ā, ka tino motuhake ia, ka whakawhetai hoki. Koinei tētahi o ngā huarahi torutoru hei whakaatu i te whakawhetai me te aroha ki tō hoa.

20. Kia ātaahua te āhua mōna 

Kia mau tonu te hiahia o tō hoa tāne ki a koe mā te ātaahua ki a ia. Ehara i te mea me whakapaipai tonu koe i a koe. E kī ana mātou i tēnei nā te mea he mea maori te noho humarie ki tō hoa mō te wā roa, ā, ka tīmata koe ki te manaaki i a ia me te mea he hoa tawhito. Ehara tēnā i te mea kino. Ko te tikanga kei te tiakina pai kōrua, kei te noho tahi hoki. 

Heoi, he mea nui kia toa tonu koe i te ngākau o tāu tāne i ia wā, i ia wā, ā, kia hoki anō tōna aroha Mā te pupuri i te putanga pai rawa atu o koe i runga i te tēpu i ētahi wā. Whakamaharatia ia he aha i aroha ai ia ki a koe i te tuatahi. Kākahuria ō kakahu, kakara pai, ā, kia whakamere tonu ngā mea.

I mōhio a Cody Francis ki tāna i waiata ai: "Ka taea e tātou te ata haere. Kia tika tā tātou mahi i tēnei. Kua whakakorehia aku mahere katoa. Kia noho tahi tātou i tēnei pō. Nō reira, noho tahi tāua. Kōrerohia tae noa ki te pō. Tae noa ki te ata. Te hanga hononga..." Me mutu tātou me tēnei kīanga, "Ko te māramatanga pea te momo whanaungatanga nui rawa atu." Nō reira, ko tāu ngana ki te mārama ki a ia he nui hei pupuri i tōna hiahia. Kia tūpato, kia pono, kia pākiki, me tō tuakiri pono, kāore e whakapāha. Kei a koe tēnei.

I whakahoutia tēnei pou i te marama o Mei 2023.

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