Kāore au i te arohaina: Ngā take me te aha hei mahi mōna

“Kare au e arohaina” he kare-a-roto mamae ka pa ki a koe nga momo kare kino. Ka rite koe ki te kore koe e tika mo te aroha me te aroha o tetahi. Ko to whakaaro whaiaro ka pa ki a koe. Kare koe e noho haumaru i roto i o whanaungatanga. Ehara i te mea rerekee enei kare-a-roto ina kare koe e arohaina e to hoa, a tera pea ka puta he patai ngakau pouri – Kua tae atu korua ko to hoa ki te mutunga kore? Kaore he huarahi ki waho i tenei ahuatanga pouri? Waimarie, he maha nga mea ka taea e koe kia aroha koe ki to hoa. 

Heoi, kia taea ai ēnei huringa, me whakapau kaha kōrua ko tō hoa ki te tīmata ki te whakaaro motuhake i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga aroha. Ki te hiahia koe ki te mōhio atu mō te āhua o te aroha me te manaaki a tō hoa, i whakapā atu mātou ki tētahi kaiako ora me te kaiārahi. Joie Bose, he tohunga ki te tohutohu i te hunga e pāngia ana e te mārenatanga tukino, te wehenga, me ngā mahi moepuku. I mea ia, "He mea noa te hoha i roto i te whanaungatanga. Engari ehara i te mea noa ina kore koe e arohaina, e maiohatia rānei i roto i te whanaungatanga. Ka taea e tēnei te hanga i ngā raruraru maha i waenga i ngā hoa, ā, ki te kore tēnei e arohia, ka taea e ia te tae ki te mutunga e kore e taea te karo."

He aha ahau kāore ai e arohaina ana e taku hoa? 

"Ko te kore o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero i waenga i ngā hoa rangatira tētahi o ngā tino take kāore koe e rongo ana i te aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga." Ko ētahi atu o ngā āhuatanga ko:

• Te iti haere o te manaaki i piri ai te hononga i mua
• Te whakaiti i te whai wāhi ki ngā mahere o ia rā
• Ko te kore aro ki tētahi hoa he huarahi e whakaatu ai i te kore aroha

Tērā pea ka meinga koe e ēnei mea katoa kia whakaaro kāore tō hoa rangatira e arohaina ana. Ko Lysa, he kaiwhakahaere whakamātautau, kua pāngia e te nuinga o ngā āhuatanga i whakarārangihia e Joie. E kī ana ia kua tīmata ia ki te whakaaro kua wehe kē ia i tana tāne, i a Mike. "Kāore au e rongo i te aroha o taku tāne nā te mea kua memeha te mura. Kāore māua i rite ki mua – he hunga ngahau, he hunga hihiko. Ka whakapau kaha māua ki te mahi tahi i ngā mea. Ināianei, kua uru noa māua ki tētahi tikanga e uru ana ki te nui o te pouaka whakaata me te kai tango kai," tana kī.

Kua rapu huarahi a Lysa ki te whakatau i te wā "Kāore au e arohaina ana" me te "Kāore au e tino motuhake ana i roto i taku whanaungatanga". Kua ngana ia ki te whakaoho i a Mike mā te whakauru i a ia ki ngā mahi whakangahau - i whakamātau ia i ngā huarahi ki te kia ora tonu te muraEngari i roto i tētahi kōrerorero mō te kapu kapu, i kī mai ia kāore āna mahi tinihanga e mahi ana, ā, kei te haurangi ia. I kī atu ahau ki a ia me arotake pea e ia te take e kore ai ia e arohaina. Nā tā māua kōrerorero ahau i āwhina ki te arotahi ki ētahi take.

1. Kua mutu te whakapuaki a tō hoa i ōna whakaaro

"Kāore au e arohaina ana e taku tāne i ēnei rā nā te mea kua mutu tana whakawhitiwhiti kōrero ki ahau," te amuamu a Lysa, me te tāpiri atu, "I mua i whakapono ahau i whakawhitiwhiti kōrero māua mō te whakamarie nā te mea i taea e māua te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero. I roto i te wā, ka memeha noa iho." Tekau mā rua ngā wāhanga whanaketanga o te whanaungatangaHe kanapa ngā marama tuatahi. Ka whakapuaki ngā hoa i ngā āhuatanga hou o te ao. Ka whakamōhio atu rātou i a koe ki ngā mea e arohaina ana e rātou, ā, ka noho ngoikore anō hoki. Ko te whakaatu i te aroha me ngā mea katoa e pā ana ki a koe te mea tuatahi me mahi e koe kia rongo ai koe e hiahiatia ana i roto i te whanaungatanga aroha.

Anei ētahi mea ka taea e koe te mahi ina mutu te whakapuaki whakaaro a tō hoa:

• Kaua e tere te tauhohe, kaua hoki e whakaaro he mea kino tēnei ki a rātou. Tērā pea kei te pāngia rātou e te ahotea i te mahi, ā, kei te uaua haere hoki te mahi.
• Tātarihia mēnā kei te pēnei tā rātou mahi nā te mea i kōrero koe i tētahi mea hei whara i a rātou
• Kōrero ki a rātou ina pai ō rātou wairua, kia kitea ai he aha te mea e whakararuraru ana i a rātou
• Kia pai tō whakarongo, kaua e whakararuraru ina kōrero ana rātou i ō rātou ngākau
• Whakatauhia ngā mea i runga i te rangimārie

2. Kāore koe e rongo ana i te arohaina i ēnei rā nā te mea i teka rātou

I kī a Lysa ko tētahi o ngā take e kore ai ia e arohaina, nā te mea kua mau i a Mike e teka ana. "Ko tētahi o aua mea tawhito - ka hoki pō mai ia ki te kāinga, ka kōrero mai he mahi tāna. I tētahi wā ka kōrerotia e tōna hoa kei te haere rāua i tētahi pā. I kitea e au kua noho tēnei hei mea noa māna. I pouri ahau i tana karo i ahau. Kāore au e arohaina ina tūtaki ahau ki ngā kōrero teka," tana kī.

He mea noa te tae atu o te tangata ki te wā "Kāore au e arohaina ana i roto i taku whanaungatanga" ina kitea e rātou tā rātou hoa e teka ana, nā te mea ka wātea te whakapae mā te teka, ā, ka taea e te whakapae te whakararuraru i te whanaungatanga. Kāore he tangata e tumanako ana ka kōrero teka ā rātou e arohaina ana ki a rātou. Ko te wā ka mau rātou, tera pea ka pōuri, ka huri hei tohu whakatau. Mai i konei, ka whakawhirinaki ki te āhua o tō anga whakamua. Ka tū atu koe ki a rātou, ka kī atu "Kāore au e arohaina ana" ka tatari rānei koe, ka mātakitaki?

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3. Kāore koe e rongo ana i te arohaina nā te mea kua rerekē te whanonga o tō hoa 

Koinei te pātai e whai ake nei: Kua rerekē tō hoa rangatira i tō kōrua tūtakitanga ki tēnei wā? I te wā e whakaipoipo ana tō hoa rangatira ki a koe, ko rātou pea te putanga pai rawa atu o rātou anō. He mea hou katoa, ā, i te mea he motuhake koe i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga aroha. Kātahi ka aroha kōrua. Ka pahemo te wā, ā, ka mōhio koe he rangitahi noa iho te mura i waenganui i a kōrua, he ngaro rānei ki tētahi wāhi. Kei te whakaatu tō hoa rangatira i a ia anō. waiata mō te ngaro o te hiahia – ā, kua tīmata koe ki te whakaaro kāore ia e aroha ana ki a koe.

Ko te mea tuatahi me mahi e koe ko te whakamutu i te noho pai i roto i tō whanaungatanga, me te kimi huarahi hei puta atu i tēnei koretake. I roto i ēnei āhuatanga, e hiahia ana koe ki te arotake i te mea i hē, e hiahia ana rānei koe ki te aro atu ki tō hoa? He pai ake te kimi whakautu ki ēnei pātai e tū mai nei. Nā te mea ka roa koe e amuamu ana ki a koe anō me te kī "Kāore au e arohaina ana," ka roa ake tō mamae. 

Anei ētahi mea ka taea e koe te mahi tahi me tō hoa rangatira whakahou i te aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga:

• Whakapā atu ki ngā reo aroha o tētahi ki tētahi, kia tino whai hua ai
• Kia kotahi te kai tahi i te rā, me te kōrero mō ngā mea ohorere
• Kōrerohia ō kare ā-roto, kaua e whakamahi i ngā kupu whakanui pēnei i te "koe tonu" me te "kāore rawa". Whakamahia ngā rerenga kōrero "ahau" hei whakapuaki i ō whakaaro
• Hokona he koha iti māu i ia wā, i ia wā, kia ora tonu ai te aroha

4. Kāore tō whakaaro e whakaarohia

I a Lysa e whakaaroaro ana mō te take kāore ia i te arohaina i roto i tana whanaungatanga, ka whakatau ia nā Mike anō hoki i tīmata ki te aukati i a ia ki te whakatau kaupapa. I mea ia kāore ia i haina ki te whai wāhi atu ki ngā whakataunga takitahi i roto i tā rāua whanaungatanga. Kua kite ia he maha ngā kupu "au" me "mātou" a Mike e whakamahi ana, kaua ki te "tātou". Nā tēnei huringa whanonga whakamiharo i whakararuraru i a ia. Heoi anō, i whakaaro ia mēnā kei te arohaina ia. te wareware i a ia mō tētahi atu.

Ki te kore tō hoa e whai whakaaro ki ō whakaaro, tera pea kāore koe e rongo ana i te aroha, i te maioha rānei i roto i te whanaungatanga. Me kōrero koe ki tō hoa mō tēnei mea. Me mōhio rātou kei te whakararu noa iho tēnei whanonga i tō kōrua hononga. Ki te hiahia rātou ki te whakaora i tēnei whanaungatanga, me whakatika e rātou ā rātou mahi, me tīmata ki te whakaaro ki ō whakaaro me ō whakaaro kia rite te hiranga ki ō rātou ake.

5. Tērā pea kāore koe e arohaina mēnā ka mutu tā rātou whakamōhio i a koe ki ō rātou hoa

I te tīmatanga o tō whanaungatanga, i tino hiahia tō hoa rangatira kia whai wāhi nui koe ki tōna ao, ā, i whakauru atu rātou i a koe ki ōna hoa me tōna whānau tino pai. I hiahia rātou kia manakohia koe e ōna whanaunga. Heoi, i muri i te kotahi, i te rua rānei o ngā hui whai tikanga, kua kite koe i te memeha haere o tēnei hiahia ki te whakapau kaha. Kua meinga koe kia manukanuka kei ngaro tō rātou hiahia ki a koe. Tērā pea ka meinga koe kia kore e arohaina i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga. Koinei tētahi o ngā take e pēnei ai ō whakaaro mō tō hoa rangatira. Kōrero ki a rātou, ā, kī atu ki a rātou e hiahia ana koe ki te tūtaki ki ōna hoa me tōna whānau.

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Ngā Huarahi Hei Whakatau i te Kore Arohaina i roto i te Hononga

I kī a Joie he kare ā-tangata te "kore arohaina", nō reira kei te tangata te kawenga me te whakatau i taua kare ā-roto. "Ko tō kawenga te whakamōhio atu ki te tangata kei te kore koe e arohaina. Ā, i taua wā anō, me whakamārama koe, me te whakahaere i o tumanako"... Kātahi ka taea e koe te waihanga i ngā āhuatanga ka taea ai e tō hoa te atawhai me te aroha ki a koe," te kī a Joie. 

I tāpiri atu ia, "Me whakapau kaha anō hoki koe. Ki te whakaaturia te aroha ki a koe, ka taea e koe te whakahoki mai i te aroha ki te taumata teitei. Ki te kore, kaua e tatari kia pērā anō tō hoa." I kōrero ahau ki ētahi atu tāngata kua pāngia e ngā raruraru i roto i ā rātou whanaungatanga. I titoa e rātou ā rātou ake tohutohu me ngā tinihanga hei wikitoria i ō rātou raruraru.

1. Kia tino koa koe ki a koe anō 

I mua i te pātai i te aroha o tō hoa, pātai atu ki a koe anō mēnā ko koe te tangata tuatahi e aroha ana ki a koe anō. Ka puta tēnei ina kore tātou e maia, ina rānei kei te pāngia tātou e ngā wheako kino o mua. Kua pā mai tēnei ki ahau – kua kī atu ahau kāore au e arohaina ana i ēnei rā, nā te mea kāore taku hoa i whakautu mai ki ahau i te wā tika, i whakaaro nui noa rānei ahau ki ētahi mea. I whakaaro ahau he pai rawa atu taku whanaungatanga. Ka kitea tonutia e au ngā mea hei āwangawanga māku. Kua roa pea te wā i mōhio ai ahau ka pakaru ngā whanaungatanga i te whakaaro nui rawa.

"Arotahi ki ngā mea pai kei a koe, kaua ki ngā āhuatanga kino. Kia māia ai koe, whakanuia te ataahua o tō whanaungatanga. Tohaina te aroha ki ētahi atu, kia whai wāhi ai rātou ki tō harikoa. Haere ki te whakatau pinepine, me te whakapau i te wā ki te mahi i ngā mea e hanga maharatanga ai," te kī a Joie.

2. Whakawhanakehia ngā tikanga whanaungatanga hou 

I kī a Shaniqua, he tohunga manaaki manuhiri taitamariki, i te mutunga o te wā marena o tana whanaungatanga ki a Doug, he tauira whare wānanga, i hiahia ia ki te kī: "Kāore au i te arohaina e taku hoa tāne." I mea ia he iti ake ā rāua wā whakatā, he iti ake hoki ā rāua moepuku. He tino pouri tēnei mōna i te wā tuatahi o te harikoa. Heoi, i kī ia i mōhio ia ehara tēnei i te mutunga, nō reira i puta mai ai ētahi tikanga me ngā huarahi hei whakaoho anō i te mura o tō rāua whanaungatanga.

"Kāore e taea e au te kī tonu "Kāore au e arohaina ana" me te kore e mahi i runga i aku āwangawanga," tana kī, me te tāpiri, "He paku whakama a Doug, ā, i mōhio ahau he uaua ki a ia te tīmata anō i te kōrero. Nō reira, ka tīmata ahau ki te whakarite i ngā pō kiriata pērā i te tīmatanga o tō māua whanaungatanga. He maha ngā wā ka arahi ki te whanaungatanga piripono. Ā, mātakitaki mai? I angitu tēnei. I te mutunga ka tīmata māua ki te haere ki waho i ngā wā roa atu."

Anei ētahi āhuatanga ka taea e kōrua ko tō hoa te whakawhanake whakakaha i to whanaungatanga:

• Whakamahi i te aroha me te whakawhetai
• Ki te riri tetahi o ngā hoa, ā, e whakaputa ana i ōna whakaaro, ka taea e tetahi atu hoa te noho puku kia marino rā anō. Ka taea e kōrua te kōrero me te whakatau i ō raruraru i te wā kāore ia e pupuhi ana i te riri.
• Mahi i ngā mahi ratonga me te kore e tumanako ki tetahi utu
• Kōrerohia ngā tumanakohanga, kia kitea ai me pēhea te whakahaere i aua tumanakohanga hei tokorua hauora.

3. Mea atu ki tō hoa "Kāore au e arohaina ana"

Mā te whakatau tika i tētahi take ka puta he hua ohorere, tere hoki. Mā te kī atu ki tō hoa "Kāore au e arohaina ana" kaua ki te pōuri, ka taea te whakaora anō i tētahi kōrero. I kī a Joie he pai rawa te kī atu ki ō hoa kāore koe e arohaina ana. "Kia oti te kōrero ki a rātou, hoatu he wā ki tō hoa kia huri ai i ā rātou whanonga. Ka taea hoki e koe te āwhina i a rātou kia mārama ki tāu e rapu nei mā te whaki i te meka e kore koe e arohaina," tana kī.

Engari i mua i tō kōrero ki tō hoa kāore koe e arohaina ana, me kimi pea koe i te mea e whakamā ai koe. Kua rerekē rānei ō rātou whanonga, kua mutu rānei tā rātou kōrero ki a koe? Mena koinei te mea whakamutunga, he tohutohu tā Joie māu. "Ki te mutu te kōrero a tō hoa ki a koe, kōrero ki a rātou, ā, kia... ngā tumanakohanga pono i roto i te whanaungatanga"E kore e taea te puta he whanaungatanga hauora me te kore e whakapuaki te tangata i ō rātou oranga. Ka ara ake te ruarua me te kore e māia, ā, ka noho tawhiti te tangata. Mā te whakapuaki ka whakanui ake i te piripono," tana kī.

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4. Whakangāwarihia mēnā kāore koe e arohaina ana i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga

Kāore e tika kia waiho te whakataa i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga hei taahiraa kino. Ka taea te whakaaro he wā whakaaroaro anō tēnei – kia kitea ai he aha te hē. Me titiro atu hei wāhanga o tētahi whanaungatanga, kaua hei wehenga atu i te tikanga noa. I tangohia e Mileena, he kaiwhakaako toi whawhai, rāua ko tana hoa tāne, ko Salim, he kaimahi peeke, te whakataa i roto i te wairua tika, ā, i whakamahia hei whakahou i tō rāua whanaungatanga.

“Ko te mea kua tae ki te wā hei whakamutu i tā tātou whanaungatanga"I whakatau mātou i tētahi whakatau āta whakaaro kia mārama ai mātou ki te hē o te mahi. I kitea e mātou ā mātou whanonga e whakapataritari ana tetahi i tetahi. Kāore a Salim i harikoa i taku kōrero taipitopito mō tō mātou whanaungatanga ki ōku hoa katoa. I tētahi ara, he tika tana kōrero, nā te mea i muri i aku kōrero mō ā mātou pakanga, kua tīmata ōku hoa ki te whakaaro kāore au e aroha ana ki taku hoa tāne. Kāore i pērā. I kī atu ahau ki a Salim kia whakatikatika i tana mahi me tōna oranga, ā, i whakaae ia. Nā tēnei wehenga i homai he nui te tumanako ki a mātou," te kī a Mileena. 

Kei raro nei ētahi painga o te whakamutu i te whanaungatanga hei āwhina i a koe ki te whakatau mēnā kei te pirangi koe ki te whai i taua whanaungatanga, kāore rānei:

• Ka nui ake te aroha o te ngākau i te ngaro. Tērā pea ka tīmata kōrua te mōhio ki te hiranga o tētahi ki tētahi ina wehe kōrua.
• Ina roa te wā e noho tahi ana te tokorua, tera pea ka ngaro te tuakiri takitahi. Ina wehe kōrua, ka āwhina i a kōrua ki te kimi anō i a kōrua anō.
• Ka nui te wā mōu ki te whakatau i ō raruraru whaiaro kāore he pānga ki tō hoa rangatira, ki ō whanaungatanga rānei.
• Ka tae koe ki te whakatau mēnā ka hiahia koe ki te haere tonu i tēnei whanaungatanga, ki te whakamutu rānei

5. Rapua he āwhina a te kaitohutohu mēnā kāore koe e arohaina ana

I kōrero mai taku hoa, a Klause, ki ahau mō tana raruraru marena. "Kāore au e arohaina ana e taku wahine," tana kī, i a māua e kōrero tahi ana me te inu pia. Kua roa tēnei e tupu ana. He wahine pukumahi, he wahine pukumahi hoki a Tinah, te wahine a Klause. Koinei rāua te tokorua tino pai – he ātaahua te āhua o te tokorua, ā, he angitu hoki. Ka hiahia pea koe ki te noho tahi me rāua. Nō reira, i te kōrero mai a Klause ki ahau he raruraru ētahi, ka mōhio ahau he uaua ki a ia. 

I tohutohu atu ahau ki a ia kia kōrero ki a Tinah mō ōna kare ā-roto, ā, me kōrero taipitopito rāua mō taua mea. Heoi, i mea ia kāore he raruraru i waenganui i a rāua e whakaaro ana a Tinah, ā, mā te kī "Kāore au i te arohaina e taku wahine," ka nui ake ngā raruraru ka puta ake i a Klause. I kī atu ahau ki a ia kia whakatata atu ki tētahi kaiārahi. 

Ka taea e te kaiārahi te āwhina i a koe ki te wetewete i ō whakaaro me te kimi huarahi. I ētahi wā, kāore ngā raruraru e pēhi ana i a koe i te rahi e ai ki tō whakaaro, ā, ahakoa kotahi te wā ka tīmata te hanga rerekētanga. Mā ētahi mahi a ngā kaiārahi ka āwhina i a koe ki te mārama ki tō tūnga me te pēhea e kimi ai koe i tētahi huarahi. Ngā tohunga o Bonobology ka taea te āwhina i a koe me ō raruraru. 

6 Ngā Huarahi Hei Whakanuia Ake Te Arohaina E Koe Anō

Ina homai e te ao he whai wāhitanga ki a koe kia aroha anō ki a koe anō, he pai ake te hopu i taua whai wāhitanga, kaua e tukua kia haere. Ka nui ake tō aroha ki a koe anō, ka nui ake tō ngākau māhaki ki ō whanaungatanga. Ki te kore, ka noho pūmau koe i tō oranga katoa me te kī "Kāore au e arohaina ana." Anei ētahi huarahi tino pai hei hinga i a koe anō:

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1. Kia atawhai ki a koe ano

I mea atu a Joie, "He mea whakarihariha te tipu ake i roto i tētahi hapori uaua ki a tātou. Kaua e tukua tēnei kia pā ki tō rangimārie o te hinengaro ahakoa i ngā wāhanga whakamutunga o te ao. Kia atawhai ki a koe anō, ā, whakaarohia ko ngā mea katoa i pā ki a koe ehara i te mamae engari he akoranga o te ao mai i te ao whānui. Kia mōhio koe nā ēnei mea koe i hanga hei tangata pai ake."

Koinei te taahiraa tuatahi ki te te aroha ki a koe anō me te manaaki i a koe anōKaua e pēhia koe mā te hinga ki ngā paerewa o te hapori. Kāore koe e hiahia kia noho hei ākonga tino pai, hei whaea tino pai rānei. Ka taea e koe te tino angitu i roto i ngā mea katoa e mahia ana e koe i runga i ō ake paerewa. Koinei te mea tino tangata ka taea e koe te mahi. Tukua koe kia wātea i ngā tumanakohanga a te hapori. 

2. Kaua e whakataurite ia koe ki etahi atu

Ahakoa tō oranga whaiaro, tō oranga mahi rānei, kaua e whakataurite i a koe ki ētahi atu. Ko te whakataurite te tahae o te harikoa. Ahakoa te nui o tō aroha ki tō hoa rangatira, ka hē katoa ngā mea ina titiro koe ki ētahi atu hoa rangatira i runga i ngā pāpāho pāpori, ā, ka whakataurite i tō oranga aroha ki ngā mea e kitea ana e koe i runga i te mata o tō waea pūkoro.

Ehara i te mea pai te hae ki te oranga o ētahi atu. E kore rawa koe e pai ki a koe anō, e kore hoki e maioha ki ngā mea kei a koe ina taka koe ki roto i te... te mahanga whakatauriteE kore rawa koe e tuku i a koe anō kia whakawhetai ki te kore koe e mutu te hae.

3. Whakamanuhiritia koe ki ngā mea ataahua 

He tina rama mā te tangata kotahi? He hokohoko ko koe anake? He kai keke māu anake? He āe nui ki ngā mea katoa e mahia ana e koe hei whakahari i a koe anō. He mea whakararuraru ēnei mō te wā poto, ā, ka nui te makona o te hinengaro. Kāore koe e pouri ki te whakapau moni ki a koe anō, ki te whāngai rānei i a koe ki ētahi keke tiakarete. He huarahi rerekē tēnei ki te whakaaro kei te manaakitia koe e koe, engari he taahiraa tino nui hei whakahari i a koe anō. 

4. Kia okioki mai i nga mahi paapori

Akoranga Kua maha ngā wā kua whakamātauhia e koe ka taea e te pāpāho pāpori te arahi ki te pouri. Ka pau ngā hāora ki te "panuku i te ao". Ahakoa tō tau me tō ira tangata, ka taea e te pāpāho pāpori te whakaputa i ngā tohu pouri. Ki te kore e taea e koe te okioki katoa mai i te pāpāho pāpori, ngana ki te whakaiti. Whakapaua te wā kounga ki a koe anō mā te whakawhāiti i tō whakamahinga o ia rā, me te whakapau i te wā e toe ana ki te mahi i tētahi mea ka taea te whakahari i a koe anō.

5. Tirohia anō ngā mahi whakangahau tawhito, hangaia rānei tētahi mea hou

Anei ētahi hākinakina ka taea e koe te hoki anō ki te mahi, ki te whakawhanake rānei mēnā kāore koe e arohaina ana e tō hoa, ā, kei te aro nui koe ki te aroha ki a koe anō i te tuatahi:

• Te whatu, te peita, me te tunu kai
• Te tuhi i ō whakaaro ki roto i te puka tuhipoka
• Te pānui pukapuka pai
• Te mahi i te whakawhetai mā te mahi tūao, te mahi rānei i ētahi mahi atawhai
• Te whakaaroaro

6. Whakamātauria te hiahia ā-ira tangata 

Me whakamahi koe i ō rohe hiahia i ētahi wā kia pai ai tō wairua. Ka taea e koe te kōrero ki tō hoa, me te whakamōhio atu ki a ia he aha tāu e pai ai i te moenga. Whakanuia ngā mea i runga i te moenga mā te whakamahi i ngā taonga takaro ira tangata me te whakamātau i ngā mahi whakaari. Ki te kore tō hoa rangatira i konei, ka taea e koe te whakahari i a koe anō. Mā te mōhio pai ake ki tō tinana ka pai ake tō oranga. 

He mea maori te piki me te heke o te whanaungatanga – kia whakaaro te tangata "Kāore au i te arohaina." Heoi, kaua e tukua tēnei raruraru kia whakapōrearea i tō hinengaro, engari me whakahaere e koe te take, me te rapu i te take o te raruraru. Ka taea e koe te tīmata ki te piki ake, ā, ina kite koe i tētahi ahunga whakamua, ka oati ahau ka pai ake tō wairua. 

I whakahoutia tēnei tuhinga i te marama o Hānuere 2023.

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Te whakaaro kāore e hiahiatia ana i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga - me pēhea te whakatau?

9 Ngā Tohu e Whakamarie Ana Koe i roto i tētahi Hononga engari Kāore i te Aroha

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Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

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