Te Marenatanga VS Te Noho-ā-Rohe: Ngā Mea Katoa e Hiahia Ana Koe kia Mōhio

Kua rerekē te āhua o ngā whanaungatanga i tēnei mano tau hou. I ngā wā o mua, ko ngā whanaungatanga takirua he hononga i waenganui i te tāne me te wahine, ā, ko te mutunga iho ko te marena. I ēnei rā, kua whānui haere taua whānuitanga. Ko tētahi ia o ngā whanaungatanga o te ao hou ko te noho tahi a ngā tāne me te wahine, ā, ka tae atu tātou ki te tautohetohe mō te marena pumau me te noho tahi.

He mārama ngā rerekētanga i waenganui i ngā tokorua? He tautohetohe mō ngā tauera mākū i runga i te moenga e rua? He toa rānei tētahi o rāua, he whenua tūturu e rite ana ki te āniwaniwa me te pūrerehua? Ahakoa e tino mōhio ana mātou ka whakapataritari ngā tauera mākū i runga i te moenga i tētahi tokorua i te iti rawa i te kotahi wā i roto i ō rāua oranga, tera pea e kore e kitea ngā rerekētanga whānui i waenganui i a rāua i te tirohanga tuatahi.

I te mea kei te noho tahi kōrua ko tō hoa rangatira i ngā āhuatanga e rua, tera pea ka whakaaro koe kāore i te tino kitea ngā rerekētanga i waenga i te marena me te noho tahi. Engari ina tirohia e koe ngā mea katoa, tera pea ka miharo koe ki ngā rerekētanga mārama. Me titiro tātou ki ngā mea me mōhio koe mō ia momo whanaungatanga.

Ngā Rerekētanga i waenga i te Marena me te Noho-ā-Rohe 

I ēnei rā, he mea noa te noho tahi me te marena, ki te kore he nui ake. Kua kitea e ngā rangahau kua heke haere ngā reiti marena, ā, kei te piki haere te reiti o ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi. Tata ki ngā tokorua katoa e mau ana i tētahi hononga roa, ka noho tahi i ēnei rā. Kātahi ka uru atu ētahi ki te marena. Ki ētahi atu, kua kore e whai tikanga te whakaaro nā te mea kua noho tahi rātou, ā, kua pērā tonu te mahi, me te kore e uru ki ngā tikanga me ngā herenga e pā ana ki te whakatūnga o te marena.

Heoi, ko te rerekētanga matua i waenga i te marena me te noho tahi kei roto i ngā mana ture ka taea e koe te kereme hei hoa rangatira mā tetahi, me ngā mana ture e taea ai e koe te kereme hei hoa noho tahi.

Ki te kitea kōrua ko tō hoa rangatira kei te ara whakawhiti o tō kōrua whanaungatanga, ā, kei te whakaaroaro kōrua mēnā me marena kōrua, me noho tahi noa rānei, he pai te paunatia o ngā painga me ngā huakore o te marena me te noho tahi. Anei ētahi meka hei whakaaroaro māu ina whiriwhiri ana i te 'marena, noho tahi rānei'.

1. Ngā whanaketanga whanaungatanga

He hononga te marena i waenganui i ngā whānau, engari ko te whanaungatanga noho tahi he whanaungatanga i waenganui i ngā hoa e rua. He mea pai, he mea kino rānei tēnā, i runga i tō tirohanga ki te ao me tāu e hiahia ana mai i tō whanaungatanga. Ki te whakarihariha koe ki te whakaaro ki te takaro i te tamahine, i te hunaonga rānei , ko te whanaungatanga noho tahi pea te huarahi hei whai. Engari ki te mea he tirohanga tuku iho tāu ki ngā whanaungatanga, mā te marena koe e pai ake ai te noho haumaru.

2. Ngā tamariki i roto i te marena me te whanaungatanga noho tahi

Mena kei roto i tō moemoeā te whānau tamariki, he mea nui tēnei hei whakaaroaro māu ina whiriwhiri ana i te marena, i te noho tahi rānei. I runga i te ture, ka whai mana ture ngā hoa noho tahi ki te oranga o ā rātou tamariki.

He uaua pea te kawe mai i tētahi tamaiti ki tētahi hononga noho tahi, mēnā ka hē te āhua i waenganui i a kōrua ko tō hoa. I tētahi atu taha, i roto i te marena, ka tino tiakina ngā tika o te tamaiti. Engari ki te mutu te marena, ka noho tonu ngā pakanga mō te mana tiaki tamariki hei take mamae i roto i ngā tukanga whakarere.

3. Ko te whakapau kaha te rerekētanga matua i waenga i te marena me te noho tahi

E whakaatu ana ngā rangahau he nui ake te tūponotanga o ngā tāne me ngā wāhine kua mārena ki te whakaatu i te ngākau harikoa me te kaha ake o te whakapau kaha ki te whakatutuki i te whanaungatanga i ērā e noho tahi ana.

E whakaatu ana hoki ngā rangahau kāore te noho tahi i te mea he whakatau āta whakaarohia. Tērā pea ka tīmata mā te waiho i tētahi paraihe niho ki te whare o tētahi, ki te noho i te nuinga o ō kōrua rā ki reira. I tētahi rā ka mōhio koe e hiahia ana koe ki te noho tahi me rāua, engari kāore anō kia tutukihia ngā kōrero mō te whakapau kaha, te heke mai me ngā whāinga o te ao. Nō reira, mai i te tīmatanga, ka tīmata te whanaungatanga noho tahi ki te pāngia e ngā raruraru whakapau kaha.

Ina whakaarohia e koe te whakatau tino nui mō te marena, te noho tahi rānei, he mea nui ngā tirohanga a te hapori me te ture.

4. He mea nui kia whai whakaaro ki te hauora pai ake i roto i te whiriwhiri i te marena, i te noho tahi rānei

E ai ki te Psychology Today, e whakaatu ana ngā rangahau ka taea e te marena te whakatairanga i te hauora hinengaro me te hauora tinana i waenga i ngā hoa, kaua ki te noho takakau, ki te noho tahi rānei.

He iti ake te maha o ngā mate pūmau e pāngia ana e ngā tāne me ngā wāhine kua marenatia, ā, he nui ake hoki te auau whakaora, nā te mea pea he nui ake te manakohia o te hapori, ā, he pumau hoki ō rātou kare ā-roto i roto i te whare marena tuku iho. He uaua ki te tohu i ngā take mō tēnei, engari kāore ngā tatauranga e teka.

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Te Marenatanga me te Noho-ā-Rohe – Ngā Mea hei Whakaaroaro

He maha ngā āhua me ngā āhua o ngā whanaungatanga i ēnei rā, ā, kāore he aratohu hei whakatau mēnā he pai ake tētahi i tētahi. I te nuinga o te wā, ko taua whakatau ka whakawhirinaki ki ō whiringa me ō āhuatanga takitahi. Heoi anō, ko te whiriwhiri i te marena me te noho tahi he mea e tika ana kia noho tahi koe mō te wā roa, nō reira, kaua taua whakatau e mahia mārire noa. Anei ētahi meka hei pūtake mō tāu whiriwhiri:

Ngā kōrero pono mō ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi:

Kei te piki haere te rongonui o ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi i waenga i ngā tāne me ngā wāhine taitamariki i ēnei rā. E whakaatu ana tētahi rangahau i whakahaerehia e te CDC i te US i te pikinga nui o te maha o ngā tāne me ngā wāhine e noho tahi ana i waenga i te 18 ki te 44 tau te pakeke. Ko tētahi o ngā painga nui o ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi ko te whai wāhi ki te mōhio ki tō hoa rangatira me te kore e uru ki tētahi whanaungatanga ture . Hei whakatau mēnā koinei te kōwhiringa pai māu, anei ētahi painga me ngā huakore o te noho tahi hei whakaaro:

1. Kāore he whakaritenga ōkawa i roto i te whanaungatanga noho tahi 

Ka taea e ngā pakeke e rua e whakaae ana te whakatau ki te noho tahi i ngā wā katoa o tō rāua whanaungatanga. Kāore he whakaritenga hei whakamana i tētahi whakaritenga pēnei. Ko tāu noa he wāhi hei neke atu, ā, kua rite koe ki te haere. Tērā pea ka nui te tukanga katoa o te marena hei ārai i te tokomaha mai i tēnei. Ko wai e hiahia ana ki te whakauru i te kāwanatanga ina ko tāu noa he tīmata ki te pupuri i ō taonga ki te whare o tō hoa, tika?

Ki te tini o te tangata, koinei te mea nui hei whakaaroaro māu ina whakaarohia ana ngā painga me ngā huakore o te marena me te noho tahi. I runga i te pepa, tera pea te āhua nei he rite ki te whiwhi i te pai rawa atu o te oranga marena me te kore e pā ki te raruraru o te marena.

2. Ka taea te whakamutu i te noho tahi i roto i te kore mana whakahaere

Nā te mea kāore he whakaaetanga ture i roto i te whanaungatanga, ka taea te whakamutu i te whanaungatanga i te wā e tīmata ana. Ka taea e ngā hoa tokorua te whakatau tahi kia whakamutua te whanaungatanga, kia neke atu, kia haere tonu. Ka taea rānei e tētahi o ngā hoa te whakamutu i te whanaungatanga, kia mutu ai.

Ahakoa kāore he tukanga roa hei whakamutu i tētahi hononga noho tahi, ko te taumahatanga kare ā-roto e pā ana ki a koe ka rite ki te whakarere. Ina whakaarohia te marena me ngā hononga roa, tera pea nā ngā ture e pā ana ki te whakamutu i tētahi marena e hoatu ana ki te tangata he hihiri anō ki te mahi ki te whakatika.

3. Kei ngā hoa te wehenga o ngā rawa 

Kāore he aratohu ture hei whakahaere i ngā tikanga o ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi. Koinei tonu tētahi o ngā whanaungatanga tino pumau, tino rerekē hoki i waenga i te marena. Kāore anō ā mātou ture kia whakatikatikaina kia rite ki ngā huringa o te wā, ā, i tēnei wā, kei te aro atu ngā kōti ki ngā tautohe i waenga i ngā tāne me ngā wāhine e noho tahi ana i runga i te kaupapa takitahi.

Ki te whakatau kōrua ko tō hoa rangatira ki te whakamutu i te whanaungatanga, me mahi te wehewehenga o ngā rawa mā te whakaae tahi a ngā taha e rua. Mēnā ka puta he tautohe, he koretake rānei, ka taea e kōrua te rapu huarahi ture. Koinei tētahi o ngā ngoikoretanga matua o ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi.

4. He whakaritenga kei reira hei waiho i tētahi taonga tuku iho

Kāore ngā ture noho tahi e kapi i te taonga tuku iho mēnā ka mate. Mēnā ka mate tētahi o ngā hoa, ka riro tonu i te hoa ora te taonga tahi.

Heoi, ki te mea kotahi anake te hoa rangatira e pupuri ture ana i te whenua, me hanga e rāua he wira hei whakarite kia whakaratohia tetahi atu. Mēnā kāore he wira, ka riro te rawa i te whanaunga tata. Kāore he mana o te hoa rangatira e ora tonu ana ki te whenua mena kāore tōna ingoa i whakahuatia i roto i te wira a te hoa rangatira.

5. Pūkete putea tahi i roto i te whanaungatanga noho tahi

He uaua pea te whakatū i ngā pūkete tahi, te inihua, ngā visa, te tāpiri i tō hoa rangatira hei kaitono i roto i ngā tuhinga pūtea, tae atu ki te toro atu ki te hōhipera. He mea nui tēnei hei whakaaroaro māu mō ngā painga me ngā huakore o te noho tahi.

Mena he rerekē ngā pūkete a ngā hoa e rua, kāore e taea e tētahi o rāua te whakamahi i te moni kei roto i te pūkete a tētahi atu. Mena ka mate tētahi o ngā hoa, kāore e taea e tētahi atu te whakamahi i tā rāua moni kia whakatauhia rā anō te whenua.

Heoi, ka taea e koe te whakatuwhera i tētahi pūkete peeke tahi mēnā ka whakaae koe ka taea e tō hoa rangatira te uru atu, te whakahaere rānei i ō pūkete peeke. Mēnā he pūkete peeke tahi, kāore e whakawhāitihia te mana motuhake ā-pūtea o te hoa rangatira ora tonu mēnā ka mate ohorere, ka mate ohorere rānei tetahi atu.

6. Te āwhina tetahi i tetahi i muri i te wehenga

Kāore he herenga mō ngā tāne me ngā wāhine e noho tahi ana ki te tautoko tetahi i tetahi i muri i te wehenga. Ki te kore he tauākī herenga ture. Ka arahi pea tēnei ki ngā raruraru pūtea mō tētahi, mō ngā hoa tokorua rānei. Ko tētahi tēnei o ngā wero nui o ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi.

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7. Mēnā ka pāngia koe e te mate, kei te whānau te mana ki te whakatau

Ahakoa te roa o te noho tahi a te tokorua, ko te mana ki te whakatau i ngā whakaritenga mō te tautoko i te mutunga o te ora me te tiaki hauora o taua hoa rangatira kei tō rātou whānau tata tonu, ki te kore e whakahuatia tētahi atu mea i roto i te whakaaetanga. Me whakarite wawe ngā tuhinga e tika ana mēnā ka puta he āhuatanga ohorere.

8. He maha ngā wāhi pōuri o te whakatipu tamariki i roto i ngā whanaungatanga noho tahi

Nā te korenga o ngā ture mārama e whakahaere ana i ngā mana me ngā kawenga o ngā mātua kāore i te mārena turetia, ka nui ngā āwangawanga ka pā mai i te whakatipu tahi i tētahi tamaiti i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga noho tahi, inā koa mēnā ka tīmata te horapa o ngā rerekētanga. Ka taea hoki te waiho hei take te whakama pāpori e pā ana.

E kite ana koe i nāianei, ko ngā rerekētanga nui o te marena me te noho tahi kei roto i ngā ture me ngā uauatanga ka puta mai. Nā te mea kāore te herenga e whakamanahia ana e tētahi pānui ture, ka uaua pea ngā mea. Ahakoa rā, ehara i te mea he pai ake tētahi i tētahi.

Ngā Mea Mō Te Marena

Ahakoa te pikinga ake o te rongonui o te noho tahi i waenga i ngā tāne me ngā wāhine, he tokomaha tonu ngā tāngata e hiahia ana ki te marena. Ka whakatau ētahi tāne me ngā wāhine ki te moe tahi i muri i te noho tahi. Ki tā ētahi he whanaketanga ā-taiao tēnei ki te whanaungatanga aroha. He pai te marena ? He painga anō hoki? Ahakoa kei te whakaaro koe ki te marena mō ngā take mahi, hei whakamana rānei i tō whanaungatanga, anei ētahi meka hei whakaaroaro:

1. He mahi uaua ake te whakatū i tētahi marena

He whakaritenga whaimana ake te marena, e whakahaeretia ana e ētahi ture ā-rohe. Hei tauira, he tau iti rawa mō te marena. Waihoki, kia whakamanahia ai te marena e te ture, me whakamanahia kia rite ki ngā tikanga whakapono kua whakaaetia e te kāwanatanga, i roto rānei i te kooti. Me tono te tokorua mō te rēhitatanga o te marena i muri mai, me te tiki tiwhikete mai i tētahi mana whai mana.

2. He tukanga ture te whakamutu i te marena

Ko te whakakorenga o te marena he whakakorenga, he whakarere rānei, ā, he roa, he uaua hoki ngā tukanga ture e rua. Ahakoa he arai me te pouri te whakamutu i te whanaungatanga noho tahi, he uaua ake te tukanga whakarere i te whakamutu i te noho tahi.

3. He wehewehenga o ngā rawa i roto i te whakarere 

Ko te tikanga o te whakarere he wehewehenga o ngā rawa e puritia tahitia ana e ngā hoa rangatira. I runga i ngā whakataunga, i ngā kōrero rānei o te whakarere, ka taea te tohatoha i ngā rawa. Nā te mea kei raro i ngā ture e whakahaeretia ana i roto i te kooti ngā mea katoa, kāore he wāhi nui mō te whakapoauau, te tautohetohe rānei mō tēnei mea.

4. Me tautoko te hoa rangatira e pumau ana te taha pūtea i tetahi atu

Kei te hoa rangatira e pumau ana te taha pūtea te kawenga ki te whakarato i te oranga mō te hoa kua wehea ahakoa kua wehe. Ka taea tēnei mā te tautoko moni, mā te oranga ia marama rānei, mā ngā mea e rua rānei, e ai ki te whakatau a te kooti.

5. Te tika ture ki te whakatau i ngā whakataunga mō te hoa rangatira 

Mēnā ka pāngia tētahi o ngā hoa e te mate kino, kei te hoa kē te mana ture ki te whakatau i ngā whakataunga nui e pā ana ki te hauora, te pūtea, tae atu ki te tiaki i te mutunga o te oranga. Tērā pea ka taea te whakaaro ko ēnei ture ētahi o ngā painga o te marena, kaua ki te noho tahi, nā te mea ka whiwhi aunoa ngā tāne me ngā wāhine marena i te mana ki te whakatau i aua whakataunga.

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6. Te tika ki te tuku taonga

Ka riro aunoa i te pouaru, i te tāne rānei kua mate ngā rawa o tōna hoa rangatira kua mate, ki te kore e whakahuatia tētahi atu mea i roto i tētahi whakaū ture.

7. Te mana o ngā uri

Ko te tamaiti i whānau mai i tētahi tokorua kua mārenatia, ko ia te uri tuku iho mō ā rāua rawa katoa, ā, ko te kawenga mō te tautoko i te tamaiti i te taha pūtea kei runga i ngā mātua.

8. I muri i te whakarere

Ahakoa te wehenga, te whakarere rānei, he kawenga ture tā te mātua kāore i te tiaki i te tamaiti ki te tautoko pūtea me te mātua tahi i ngā tamariki i whānau mai i te marena.

Thoughts Final

Ko te rerekētanga i waenga i te marena me te noho tahi kei roto i te whakaae ā-pāpori me te ture e pā ana ki te marena tuatahi. I te whanaketanga o te hapori, ka rerekē pea ēnei āhuatanga. I ēnei rā, ko te marena te momo here pumau mō te whanaungatanga roa.

Ahakoa rā, tera pea ka puta mai ngā mahanga me ngā ngoikoretanga o te marena, inā koa mēnā ka mutu ko te tangata hē. Nō reira, he whakaaro pai te noho tahi i mua i te marena? Kia mōhio koe kāore he huarahi kotahi e pai ana mō te katoa ina tae mai ki ngā kōwhiringa whanaungatanga. Heoi, he mea tika kia paunatia ēnei painga me ngā ngoikoretanga ina whakatau ana koe.

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Āta karohia ngā whakaaro whakamomori ina pāngia koe e te whakakorenga i roto i te aroha

Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.