Te Noho i roto i te Marenatanga Pōrearea me ngā Taupatupatu Marenatanga

Ehara i te mea ko ngā marena katoa, ko ngā hēkona katoa rānei o te marena ka rite ki te harikoa tonu i te wā tonu ka kī koe, 'Ae'. Ko ngā pēhanga o te ao marena, ngā whanaungatanga me te aroha poto noa, ka meinga te tangata kia rite ki te mea kei roto rātou i tētahi marena koretake.

Ahakoa kua mutu te tuku karere tetahi ki tetahi mō tō rā i a kōrua e mahi ana, te āhua nei kāore kōrua e moe tāne ana, te roa rānei o ā kōrua pakanga i ia pō, tera pea kei roto kōrua i tētahi marena e tūkino ana.

He aha te Marenatanga Pōrearea?

A te faaipoiporaa oaoa he wāhi e nui ana te māramatanga, te whakapau kaha, te aroha me te tuwhera. Ae, ahakoa i roto i ngā marena tino harikoa, ehara i te mea he tino tika ia rā, ā, he nui ngā tautohetohe, ngā pakanga me ngā mamae.

Heoi, he rerekē rawa te whakamāramatanga o te marena koretake i tēnā. I roto i te marena koretake, ka memeha haere ngā uara matua o te whakapau kaha, te māramatanga me te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero. Ahakoa ka mahia tēnei i roto i te wā, he uara rānei kāore i tino whakatipuria i roto i tā rāua whanaungatanga, ka pā kino pea te marena koretake ki a koe hei tangata, hei hoa hoki. Pānuihia te kaupapa e whai ake nei kia mārama ake ai koe ki te ariā o te whanaungatanga koretake.

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Ngā Taupatupatu Marena Kāore e Mahi

I te 2.30 i te ata ka tae mai tana waea, e wiri ana i raro i ahau i a au e takoto ana i te moenga. I takoto taku tāne i runga i ahau. I mea ia he tūpono noa iho te waea, engari i mōhio ahau ehara i te mea pono. I mea ia kāore ia i te tino mōhio ki a ia. Engari i mau tonu te pikitia o ia, me ōna makawe e rere ana, he mowhiti ihu me ngā aviators pango i roto i taku mahara i a ia e whakamā ana i tōna hiahia.

I haurangi taku tāne, ā, kāore au i hiahia kia totohe ia, kia tutu rānei. I noho puku ahau, ā, i whakaari i te marino pērā i ngā wā katoa. Kāore he mea hou ki ahau tō māua aroha koretake. Kāore ia i te mōhio, he tupuhi kei te pupuhi i roto i ahau.

Kua whai ahau ngā take whakahaere riri ā, i tohutohungia ahau kia whakaharatau i ngā tikanga manawa hōhonu, ā, koinā tonu taku i tīmata ai i te tīmatanga o te amuamu a taku tāne. I hiahia ia ki te whakaatu ki te ao ko tōku āhua kare ā-roto te raruraru.

Ngā Take Noa o ngā Taupatupatu Marena

He maha ngā āhuatanga e whai wāhi ana ki ngā pakanga o te marena, tae atu ki:

• Wehenga Whakawhitiwhiti: Ka taea e te koretake o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero te arahi ki te kore māramatanga me te riri.
• Te taumahatanga putea: Ka taea e ngā whakahē mō te whakapau moni, te penapena, me ngā kaupapa matua mō te pūtea te whakararu i ngā whanaungatanga.
• Ngā Take Whakawhanaungatanga: Tērā pea ka hua ake ngā kare ā-roto e te korenga o te whanaungatanga ā-tinana, ā-hinengaro rānei.
• Ngā Tumanakotanga Rerekē: Ka taea e ngā whāinga, ngā tumanakohanga rānei o te ao kāore i te ōrite te whakatupu i ngā ngangau i waenganui i ngā hoa.

Nō reira ka tīmata te kēmu whakapae i roto i tā māua hononga koretake

I roa te amuamu a taku tāne.

"Kāore rawa he raruraru i pā mai ki ahau i tō hokinga mai i ngā pāti i te 3 i te ata."

-Kāore koe i kawe mai i ahau, kāore hoki i whakahoki mai i ahau, i mea mai koe kia mahia e au ko au anake.

"Tokorua ō hoa tāne i waea atu ki a koe i te pō."

He waea anō tēnei i puta i ngā tau e waru ki muri. I whawhai tētahi hoa ki te hiahia whakamomori, ā, i whakapā mai ki ahau, me te mōhio he tangata hiamoe ahau. I puta anō tētahi atu i ētahi tau ki muri, mai i tētahi hoa mahi. I te ata i muri mai ka whai whakaaturanga mātou, ā, me whakaoti e ia te mahere kaupapa, ā, me whakaae mai ahau.

"He tangata whanoke tō hoa o mua i whakarērea koe. He kino hoki ia," te kōrero tonu a taku tāne.

-Ehara taua tangata i taku hoa o mua. I pai ahau ki a ia. Kāore i pai i taua wā. Ā, kāore he mea nui ki ahau te āhua o te tangata; ko te ngākau te mea nui.

"Kei te ngangau koe, kei te whawhai koe, e te wahine uwha. He porangi koe. He tangata pāpori-mate."

Nā te mea i tupu i pōuri ai ahau, ā, i noho puku ahau. Kāore au i kōrero i tetahi kupu, i whakarongo noa ahau ki taku tāne.

"He hunga whakahihi, he kuware hoki ō koutou teina."

He tākuta angitu tētahi o ōku teina. E whitu, e waru rānei āna pokanga i te rā. Ko tētahi i toa i ana whakamātautau poari. Ko tāku he hae te tāne ā, e whakaeke tonu ana i a rātou – ōku pou kaha.

"He tangata puremu tōu pāpā. He tangata whanoke ia, he maha āna mahi moepuku."

Kua pāngia ahau e te marena puremu koretake a ōku mātua, ā, kua whakapuakina e au tōku pouri ki taku tāne. I whakamanahia rānei e te hītori o tōku pāpā ngā mahi 'kore kino' a taku tāne i waenganui pō, i te awatea rānei?

Āe, ehara ēnei i te whakaipoipo noa iho, ki taku whakaaro. Engari e mōhio ana tātou, e mārama ana hoki, ina whiti ngā rārangi, kāore?

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Te kore o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero hauora

I papaki riri ahau i a ia, ā, ka marino ia mō tētahi, e rua rānei meneti. He maha ngā wā i hiahia ahau ki te patu i a ia kia marino ai ia, ki te kore, he maha, maha ngā kupu mamae āna i kōrero mai ki ahau, kāore i mutu. Heoi, kāore ia i patu tika i ahau i roto i tā māua marena pōrearea.

Ehara i te mea ko ia anake, ko te kōtiro he mowhiti ihu tōna. He maha ngā wā i kite ahau i taku tāne e "tino pai" ana ki aku hoa takakau, e noho ana hei pakihiwi mō rātou hei tangihanga. Ā, i te mutunga ka hae aua hoa wāhine ki ahau mō te "tāne pai" i ahau, i te mea kāore rātou i te mōhio ki te aroha kino me te koretake o tēnei whare.

Kāore au i te mōhio he aha te kaupapa o taku kōrero, engari he wahine ngaio tino kaha ahau, he ngoikore ake i te tautau tipu i roto i tōna ao whaiaro o te aroha pōrearea me te marena kino.

I ētahi wā ka nui rawa ngā pakanga i te kāinga, ka patua e au taku tāne, nā te mea he momo whiu tāna. ngā kupu mamaeI tino pā mai tēnei i te wā i whara ai ahau. I hopukina ahau e ia i te kāinga. I ngana ia ki te whakamate i ōku hiahia katoa, ā, i whakaiti i ahau. I whawhai ahau ki tēnei, ā, ka noho marino ia, ka mutu.

He kōrero mō te aroha koretake

Kei konei tonu mātou. E wehi ana ā mātou tamariki i ngā raruraru o te kāinga. Kāore e taea e au te whakahaere i a au anō i muri i tētahi tohu, ā, ka takaro taku tāne ki tēnā. Ki te ao, ko au te tangata e ngangau ana, ko ia tonu te kaihoko marino. Kāore tetahi e mōhio ana ki ā mātou pakanga koretake, ā, ko ētahi tāngata e whakaaro ana ki tā mātou marena. Kāore rātou i te mōhio ki te pōrearea o tō mātou ao.

I ētahi pō, ka whakaarahia ahau e ia i te moe – kia moe tāne, kia whawhai rānei. He makariri ahau, he mātao, he wahangu hoki i te nuinga o te wā. He maha tonu taku whakaaro ki te whakamomori. I ētahi wā, ka haere ahau ki te takai puku i tētahi tīhi. Kua tīmata ahau ki te momi tarukino i te wāhi tūmataiti.

E hiahia ana ahau ki te aroha, engari he raruraru whakawhirinaki kei ahau inaianei. Kua kati ahau i taua wāhanga e whakaae ana ki te aroha. Kei te tatari ahau kia haere ā māua tamariki ki te whare wānanga i mua i te mahi i tetahi mea nui. E whā tau noa iho. Tērā pea kei te tatari ahau, me te tumanako ka huri taku tāne. E aroha ana ahau ki taku tāne, ā, e mōhio ana ahau e aroha ana hoki ia ki ahau engari kāore e taea te haere tonu o tēnei aroha paitini o ia rā me te koretake o tā māua marena.

Mena kei roto koe i tētahi marena koretake e pā kino ana ki a koe, tēnā whakapā mai ki a mātou tohungaMā te ratonga tohutohu whanaungatanga ipurangi koe e āwhina ki te kimi i te harikoa i roto i tōu ao. Ka taea e koe te whakamahi i ēnei ratonga i ngā utu tino whaitake mai i te whakamarie o tōu kāinga mā te waea WhatsApp, Skype, Google Hangout, Zoom, mā te tikanga whakawhitiwhiti kōrero rānei e pai ana ki a koe.

E ai ki a Joie Bose

Thoughts Final

He uaua, he kino hoki te noho i roto i tētahi marena pōrearea e kī ana i ngā pakanga, ā, he kino hoki ki te oranga o te tangata. Heoi, mā te whakapau kaha, te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero tuwhera, me te hiahia ki te rapu āwhina, ka taea e ngā tāne me ngā wāhine te mahi ki te whakatau i ngā pakanga me te hanga anō i tētahi whanaungatanga hauora ake, whai hua ake. Ki te kite koe kei te raru koe i ngā pakanga o te marena, whakaarohia te toro atu ki tō mātou kaitohutohu marena raihana, kaiwhakaora hinengaro rāneiKa taea e ngā aratohu ngaio te tuku i ngā māramatanga me ngā rautaki whai hua e hāngai ana ki tō āhuatanga ahurei.

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