Kodi chikondi chenicheni n'chiyani? Kodi chikondi chenicheni chilipo? Kodi chikondi chenicheni? Mafunso awa, pamodzi ndi ena zana, ndi abwinobwino ngati mwangoyamba kumene "kugwa m'gawo lachikondi" kapena kusokonezeka pa ubale wanu wapano. Lingaliro la chikondi chenicheni si lachidule ndi nthano za sayansi. Owona zenizeni anganene kuti chikondi sichingaphunziridwe kapena kumveka koma wolemba mwa ine wakhala akufunitsitsa kudziwa za chikondi komanso kukhala wokhulupirika kwa munthu m'modzi.
Chikondi ndi chomangira chamaganizo chomwe chimapangidwa tikamaganizira kwambiri za kupatsa osati kulandira. Ndizosalimba kwambiri. Ngati asamalidwa mosasamala, akhoza kuwononga ngakhale amphamvu kwambiri kuposa tonsefe. Kodi mumadziwa bwanji kuti chikondi ndi chenicheni? Zimasiyana pa maubwenzi osiyanasiyana, kwa anthu omwe ali ndi umunthu wosiyana pazochitika zosiyanasiyana, koma pali zinthu zingapo zomwe zingakuthandizeni kudziwa ngati zomwe mukukumana nazo ndi chikondi chenicheni kapena ayi.
Mfundo 10 Zoti Mudziwe Ngati Ndi Chikondi Chanu Choona Kapena Ayi
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Chikondi chenicheni ndi chamatsenga, koma nthawi zina mumadzimangirira kuti muyambe kutaya umunthu wanu. Zonse zomwe mumachita ndikukwaniritsa zosowa za ena anu ndiye zonse zomwe mumakhala ndi "theka lina". Chikondi chenicheni sikudzipeza nokha mwa munthu wina ndikutaya umunthu wanu komanso umunthu wanu.
Ndiye mungadziwe bwanji ngati chikondi chanu ndi chenicheni? Werengani mfundo izi khumi kuti mudziwe:
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1. Amakhala bwenzi lako lapamtima
Kodi chikondi chenicheni pachokha ndi chinsinsi. Si momwe timayembekezera, ngakhale njira yakugwa m'chikondi kapena ulendo wokhala mmenemo. Chikondi chenicheni sichimangokhalira kuseka, kuseka kapena kupsompsona ndi kuyenda maulendo ataliatali pagombe. Ndi za tinthu tating'ono tomwe timatulutsa chikondi chenicheni mu ubale.
Ndi chiyanjano chogawana mbali zonse zabwino ndi zoipa, mbali zonyansa ndi zopusa kwambiri za inu nokha. Kuvumbula mikhalidwe yanu yabwino yokha sikungakuthandizeni m’kupita kwa nthaŵi. Kodi ndi chikondi chenicheni ngati muli ndi chigoba mozungulira mnzanu? Kuwonetsa mbali yanu yoyipa si chizindikiro cha kufooka. Ndi njira yobisika komanso yosalunjika yonenera kuti mumamukhulupirira wokondedwa wanu.
Kodi mumadziwa bwanji kuti chikondi ndi chenicheni? Mukapanda kuwauza kuti mukukhumudwa chifukwa amadziwa kale. Kupeza bwenzi ndi wokonda mwa munthu yemweyo sikungakupangitseni kukayikira kukhulupirika kwa chikondi chenicheni. Bwenzi likudziwa zonse za moyo wanu. Ngati pali chikayikiro chilichonse pakugawana malingaliro akuzama amalingaliro anu, ndiye kuti sangakhale oyenera kwa inu.
2. Chikondi chenicheni chimakhala mu chete momasuka
Ubongo wathu umasowa zinthu zoti tikambirane nthawi ina, mwachibadwa. Nthawi zina kukhala chete kumatsitsimula komanso kumatsitsimula. Ndi chikondi chotani ngati kukhala chete kukulendewera mmwamba movutikira kapena kukhala mchipindamo ngati njovu yomwe nonse mumaiona ndikuyinyalanyaza?
Kodi chikondi chenicheni chilipo? Zimatero. Umakhala chete pakati pa okonda awiri. Mumabwera kunyumba kuchokera tsiku lalitali kuntchito ndipo zomwe mukufuna ndi nthawi yachete ndi mnzanu, komwe nonse mungakhale omasuka ndikungosangalala ndi kukhalapo kwa wina ndi mnzake.
A ubale wabwino ndi imodzi yomwe mutha kukhala ndi nthawi yabwino ndi wina ndi mnzake popanda kukakamizidwa kuti mudzaze mpaka pamacheza osangalatsa. Apa pali yankho la momwe mungadziwire ngati chikondi chili chenicheni. Mukamagawana nthawi yokhala chete ndi okondedwa anu kumakhala gawo lathanzi komanso lotonthoza la ubale wanu.
3. Kodi mumadziwa bwanji kuti chikondi ndi chenicheni?
Ulemu umabweretsa chikondi chenicheni. Kukhalapo kwa chikondi muubwenzi nthawi zonse kumatsimikiziridwa ndi momwe ena anu amakuchitirani. Kodi amakupatsirani ulemu woyenera? Ulemu umakhala ngati chothandizira kuti ubale uliwonse usamayende bwino. Chikondi chenicheni chimavomereza makhalidwe anu oipa monga momwe chimavomerezera makhalidwe anu abwino. Chikondi ndi chenicheni pamene inu mukudziwa ndi chikondi chopanda dyera osati chikondi chodzikonda.
Mukakhala ndi ulemu kwa munthu amene munasankha kukhala naye pachibwenzi, mumaphunzira kuvomereza kukongola kwake ndi zolakwika zake. Chikondi chenicheni mu chiyanjano chimachokera ku kuvomereza. Nonse mukuphunzira kuzoloŵerana ndi zochita za wina ndi mnzake ndi kupeza malingaliro oti mungakhale nawo. Ngati mumalemekeza wokondedwa wanu, simungachite zinthu zomupweteka, kaya kunama, kusokoneza, kunyenga maganizo kapena thupi.
4. Chikondi chenicheni sichimakukhumudwitsani
Chinthu chimodzi chimene simukufuna kuti mnzanuyo achite ndi kuyatsa gasi. Gaslighting mu maubwenzi ndi njira yosokoneza maganizo kuti munthu azitha kulamulira munthu wina. Ngati ali chikondi chanu chenicheni, sangakupangitseni kukayikira misala yanu.
Chikondi chenicheni sichidzakupangitsani kukayikira nokha mpaka mutayamba kukhulupirira kuti ndizowona ndikuyamba kukayikira zenizeni zanu. Sadzanyalanyaza malingaliro anu. Sadzalamulira zokambirana mukamasemphana maganizo. Chikondi chenicheni sichidzakusokonezani kapena kukudyerani masuku pamutu.
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5. Ubale wanu wakhazikika pa kufanana
Kodi chikondi chenicheni? Yankho la funsoli lingapezeke mu zovuta za ubale wanu. Ubale sugwira ntchito pa mphamvu ndi ulamuliro. Zimagwira ntchito mofanana ndi khama. Kodi amasankha zomwe muzichita Loweruka ndi Lamlungu? Kodi amasankha nthawi yoti agonane? Kodi ndi chikondi chenicheni akakuuzani kuti muzichita zinthu zina monga kuvala zovala zaulemu kapena kukhala wamanyazi m’nyumba imene nonse mumagawana?
Ngati yankho lanu ku mafunso amenewa ndi inde, ndiye kuti si chikondi chenicheni. Aliyense ayenera kukhala ndi ubale wabwino pomwe nonse mumapatsana mwayi kuti mukhale yemwe inu muli komanso yemwe mukufuna kukhala.
6. Ubwenzi wapamtima ndi wofunikira mofanana ndi ubwenzi wapamtima
Ubwenzi wapamtima ndi kuyandikira komwe kumadziwika ndi kusatetezeka komanso kukhulupirirana. Chikondi chenicheni muubwenzi chimakhala ndi chiyanjano chamaganizo pamene okwatirana amamanga ndi kusunga kukhulupirirana, kulankhulana, kudalirika, kudzimva otetezeka ndi chitetezo cha chikondi ndi chithandizo cha moyo wonse.
Kusankha kukhulupirirana wina ndi mzake popanda kukayika konse, ndi mphamvu iliyonse ya moyo wanu ndi ubwenzi wapamtima. Kufunsa zolondola mafunso kuti apange ubwenzi wapamtima, kuwalola kuti alowe zinsinsi zanu zakuda kwambiri, zofooka zanu, zilakolako, zokhumba, zolinga ndi zina. Kubwezera zonse zomwe mwayikidwa muubwenzi ndi chikondi chenicheni.
7. Kukhala wothandizira zolinga ndi zokhumba
Chikondi si chenicheni ngati amaika maganizo awo patsogolo ndi kuika patsogolo zolinga zanu. Kodi akukufooketsani ndi kukaikira ndi mantha pokuwonetsani zopinga zomwe zingakulepheretseni kutsatira zomwe mumakonda komanso maloto anu? Ndiyo mbendera yofiyira yayikulu.
Ngati akulimbikitsani kutsatira maloto anu, ngati akufunsani kuti musanyalanyaze zopingazi ndikukutsimikizirani kuti adzakhala pambali panu nthawi zonse, ndiye kuti mukhoza kusiya kufunsa ndi chikondi chenicheni. Ndizowona ngati atenga nawo gawo pakukwaniritsa zolinga zanu.
8. Kodi chikondi ndi chenicheni? Zili ngati zimakubweretserani mtendere
Kodi chikondi chenicheni? Chikondi chilibe moyo wakuthupi womwe tingaloze ndi kunena kuti inde, chikondi ndi chenicheni. Ndizodziwikiratu. Chikondi chenicheni ndi kupereka. Imadzuka ndipo idzakudzazani ndi bata ngati mukukhala pafupi ndi nyanja 24 × 7 ndikumvetsera phokoso la mafunde.
Tonsefe timalakalaka ubale wachikondi wamtendere pomwe kupezeka kwa mnzathu kumakhala kokwanira kubweretsa bata mkati mwanu komanso mozungulira inu. Pomaliza, a gawo laukwati zidzazizira pansi ndipo mumayamba kuwona mbali zenizeni za wina ndi mzake. Zimenezi zikakuchititsani kuti muzidziwana modekha, mudzadziwa kuti ndi chikondi chenicheni.
9. Chikondi chenicheni m'banja sichiwonongeka ndi mikangano
Kukangana ndi ndewu ndizochibadwa mu ubale uliwonse. Chinyengo si kubwerera ku moyo wanu wamba mutatha kumenyana, ndi momwe mumamenyera mutakhala nokha. Chikondi chenicheni chimakhala mu chikondi ndi kukoma mtima komwe amakuwonetsani panthawi ya ndewu, komanso pambuyo pake.
Chikondi chenicheni chimathetsa mkwiyo mwamtendere. Ngati wokondedwa wanu akugwirabe ku mkwiyo ndikukhala wouma khosi ngakhale atapepesa moona mtima, siwoyenera kwa inu. Kukhululuka n’kofunika ngati mukufuna kuti ubwenziwo ukhale wolimba.
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10. Mu chikondi chenicheni, mumangodziwa kuti iwo ndi amodzi
Munthu amene mumamukonda sangafanane ndi zomwe mumakonda kapena sangafanane ndi chilichonse, koma amalemekeza kusiyana kwanu ndi kutenga nawo mbali pazochita zanu. Mukudziwa kuti ndi chikondi chenicheni akamalankhula za kukhala ndi tsogolo ndi inu.
Sichikondi akakufanizirani ndi okondedwa awo akale, kaya ndi zabwino kapena zoipa. Sali pa ex wawo pa. Akakuuzani momwe ubale wawo unalili kale kapena momwe muyenera kukhalira ngati wakale wawo, chokanipo nthawi yomweyo. Mukuyenera kuchita bwino kwambiri. Izi ndi mbendera zofiira zomwe zingakusiyeni mukufunsa, "Kodi chikondi chenicheni chilipo?" ndipo phunzirani kusamala mbendera zofiira zoterezi muubwenzi.
Nthawi zambiri ndi zinthu zazing'ono. Lingaliro loti iwo sakhala pafupi limapweteka moyo wanu. Chisangalalo choyera cha kudzuka pafupi ndi iwo ndikupeza chitonthozo m'manja mwawo. Chikondi chanu chenicheni chidzafuna kukutetezani ndi ubale wanu. Zochita zimalankhula mokweza kuposa mawu. Ngati akunena kuti amakukondani koma zochita zawo zikunena mosiyana, si chikondi chenicheni. Ubale uli ngati mtsinje. Muyenera kuzilola kuti ziziyenda mwachibadwa. Kuchilamulira si chikondi chenicheni. Mukalumikizana mozama, ndi chikondi chenicheni.
Kodi chikondi chenicheni? Inde, ndi choncho ndipo mutha kukhala ndi chikondi chenicheni kangapo. Nthawi zonse khalani okoma mtima pokonda wina. Sizingakhale zophweka kuposa zimenezo. Ena amachokera ku zochitika zoipa, zomwe zimawapangitsa kukhala odana ndi chikondi. Samalani zomwe adakumana nazo m'mbuyomu ndipo musamachite nawo malingaliro a tat. Ngati muwapweteka chifukwa chakukhumudwitsani, si chikondi chenicheni.
Yoyenera kwa inu ili kunja uko. Musataye chiyembekezo panobe. Ndipo nthawi ina mukamadzifunsa kuti ndi chikondi chenicheni, dziwani kuti ndichoncho. Kupatula kuti anthu osiyana ndi osiyana ndi njira zosamvetsetseka za kusankha ndi kusonyeza chikondi.
Ibibazo
Chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zazikulu za mwamuna ndi chikondi chopanda dyera. Sipadzakhalanso chinthu cha "Ine". Nthawi zonse zidzakhala "ife" kapena "ife". Mudzadziwa kuti ndi chikondi chenicheni pamene sachita mantha kukuwonetsani kwa abwenzi ndi abale ake. Iye adzakhala ndi inu mu nthawi zabwino ndi zoipa. Angakhale ndi chidaliro pa ubale wanu ndikuphatikizani popanga zisankho. Mudzadziwa kuti chikondi chake ndi chenicheni pamene saopa kukhala pachiwopsezo pafupi nanu. Amakuonetsani zofooka zake komanso nyonga zake.
Ubale weniweni ndi womwe onse awiri angathe kupatsana zabwino mwa iwo okha. Ngati apanga ndalama zenizeni muubwenzi, zimakhala zenizeni. Chikondi chenicheni chimabwera ndi zovuta zake. Chomwe chimapangitsa ubale kukhala weniweni komanso watanthauzo ndi momwe anthu awiri amaperekera ndi kulandira chifundo, chifundo, kukhulupirika, ubwenzi ndi chirichonse choyera, chabuluu ndi imvi cha otchulidwa anu.
Chikondi ndi chikondi. Zoona ndi zoyera ndi zofanana za wina ndi mzake. Malingana ngati chikondi chanu kwa wina ndi mzake chikuwonjezeka m'kupita kwa nthawi, ndicho chikondi chenicheni. Mudzadziwa kuti chikondi ndi chenicheni bola inu nonse mukulolera kunyengerera ndikusiya mikangano yaying'ono. Zonse ziŵiri chikondi chenicheni ndi chikondi chenicheni zili kutali ndi anthu odzikonda ndi odzikonda. Ngati munthu ali wamutu ndi wosasunthika, sangapereke chikondi chenicheni. Kukoma mtima kumapambana nthawi zonse, m'moyo komanso m'chikondi.
Zopereka zanu sizikupanga zachifundo Mphatso. Zilola kuti Bonobology ipitilize kukubweretserani zidziwitso zatsopano komanso zaposachedwa pakufuna kwathu kuthandiza aliyense padziko lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
