Ubwino wa ukwati wachikondi kuposa ukwati wokonzedweratu ndi wosawerengeka. Ngati ukwati ndiye maziko a mgwirizano pakati pa anthu awiri, chikondi ndiye magazi omwe amasunga mgwirizanowo. Ngakhale zili choncho, lingaliro la maukwati okonzedweratu likupitilizabe kupeza malo m'chikhalidwe cha anthu aku India mpaka pano. Ngakhale kuti n'kovuta kupeza ziwerengero zenizeni, kafukufuku akusonyeza kuti maukwati oposa 85% aku India amakonzedweratu kapena amakonzedwanso ndi chikondi. Zimenezi zimatisiya ndi chiwerengero chochepa cha maukwati achikondi.
Palibe kusowa kwa mabanja, makamaka m'madera akumidzi, kumene maukwati okomera anthu sangakambirane. Chifukwa chake tili ndi anthu ambiri omwe amasiya ubale wawo wachikondi paguwa la mbiri yabanja ndi ena angapo omwe amayenera kulipira ndi moyo wawo potsatira mitima yawo. Koma nchiyani chimapangitsa ukwati wachikondi kukhala wabwino kuposa ukwati wokonzeratu?
M'zaka za zana la 21, pamene unyinji wa achichepere athu sakusamala nkomwe za kupatulika kwa chisangalalo chaukwati, mkangano wonse wa 'maukwati okonzekera kapena maukwati achikondi' umapanga nkhani yochititsa chidwi. Kupenda ubwino wa ukwati wachikondi kungathandize kwambiri kuthetsa zinthu.
Ubwino 7 Wapamwamba Waukwati Wachikondi
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Ngati muli pa nthawi imeneyi m'moyo mwanu pamene chitsenderezo cha 'kukhazikika' chimayamba kukwera kuchokera ku ngodya zonse zomwe mungaganizire, n'zachibadwa kuti mudzapeza kuti mukulingalira ubwino ndi kuipa kwa banja lokonzekera kapena kukonda ukwati panthawi ina. Kusanthula uku kudzakhala m'malingaliro anu, mosasamala kanthu za ubale wanu ndi mapulani amtsogolo.
Tiloleni kuti tiyankhe mafunso angapo ndi mayankho awa. Funso la ola ndilakuti, 'chiani chimapangitsa ukwati wachikondi kukhala wabwino kuposa ukwati wokonzeratu?' Takonza mndandanda wa maubwino 7 a ukwati wachikondi. Mudzawona chifukwa chake anthu amawasankhira pamakonzedwe okonzedwa. Popanda kuchedwa, tiyeni tilowe m’mbali zosiyanasiyana zaukwati chifukwa cha chikondi.
1. Mumamudziwadi bwenzi lanu la m'tsogolo
'Mpaka imfa idzatilekanitse' - ndilo lingaliro la ukwati. Anthu awiri amabwera pamodzi kuti agawane moyo wawo. Kodi sizomveka kuti tiyambe ulendo wautaliwu ndi munthu wina yemwe mumamudziwa bwino komanso kugawana naye maubale? Ndipo kudziwa zimene mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu angakwanitse komanso zimene angakwanitse n’kofunika kwambiri kuti mukhale ndi banja losangalala. Pali kuvomereza kowonjezereka m’banja chifukwa cha chikondi. Kudziwana kumeneku sikumakhalako kwenikweni pankhani ya mgwirizano wolinganizidwa.
Ngakhale ndi chikhalidwe cha theka-anakonza maukwati kugwira pa - mukudziwa, kumene mnyamata ndi mtsikana kulumikiza pa malo ukwati ndi kukhudza mabanja okha ngati iwo anagundana wina ndi mzake - mwayi wodziwa umunthu weniweni wa bwenzi wanu angathe moyo ndi abysmally otsika. Popeza nonse mudzakhala mukukweza phazi lanu kuti 'musindikize mgwirizano'.
Uwu ndi umodzi mwaubwino wofunikira kwambiri waukwati wachikondi. Simudzakwatiwa ndi mlendo ndi chiyembekezo chakuti malingaliro anu oyamba pa iwo ndi owona. Banja siliyenera kukhazikika pa zomwe zingatheke kapena zongoganizira.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Mfundo 6 Zomwe Zimafotokoza Cholinga cha Ukwati
2. Palibe chovuta paubwenzi - Ubwino waukwati wachikondi
Chimodzi mwa zabwino kwambiri za maukwati achikondi ndichakuti mwadutsa nthawi yodziwana. Sipadzakhala manyazi mukamayesetsa kukhala pachibwenzi mukatha ukwati. Tonsefe timakumbukira momwe suhaag raat adasewerera m'mafilimu a m'ma 80 ndi 90.
Kodi mukufunadi kuti mathero a ukwati wanu ayende motere? Eya, chimenecho ndi chiwopsezo chimene mungakhale nacho ponena za maukwati olinganizidwa. Choyamba, maanja ambiri omwe ali pachibwenzi samangokhalira kugonana asanakwatirane chifukwa choopa kuweruzidwa. Izi zitha kuyambitsa kusamvana kwakukulu pakati pa okwatirana akamagawana bedi ndikukhala paubwenzi ndi wina chifukwa ali ndi udindo.
Ngakhale anthu amene amachita zimenezo angakumane ndi mavuto ngati atakhumudwa ndi kugonana. Tsopano popeza mabanja akhudzidwa ndipo nkhani yafalikira, zimakhala zovuta kuthetsa ukwati chifukwa chakuti kugonana sikunali bwino. Ndipo kugwirizana pa kugonana kumachita gawo lofunika kwambiri muubwenzi.
Mwachiwonekere, aliyense amene ali ndi udindo wotereyu angagwirizane ndi ukwatiwo, akuyembekeza ngati gehena kuti chikhalidwe cha kugonana chidzayenda bwino. Izi siziri zodetsa nkhawa pankhani yaukwati wachikondi. Mwakhalapo, mwachita zonse, ndipo chofunika kwambiri, mumakhala omasuka kukhala ndi mnzanu muzochitika zapamtima. Ndicho chifukwa chake mkangano wa 'maukwati okonzekera kapena maukwati achikondi', voti yathu ndi yomaliza.
3. Palibe chakukwiyira banja lanu m’banja chifukwa cha chikondi
Ngati mupitiliza ndi banja lokonzekera ndipo simukuchitidwa zoipa, (pamlingo wina) mudzakwiyira banja lanu chifukwa cha mgwirizanowo. Maganizo amenewa amatha kudziwika ngati munthu wavomereza kuti achite nawo masewerawa chifukwa cha kuchuluka kwa chitsenderezo cha banja. Atasudzulana, msuweni wanga wachiŵiri anakana kupita kunyumba kwa makolo ake. Ndikukhulupirira kuti anali wowakwiyira kuposa mwamuna wake wakale. Kodi zikanatheka bwanji kuti amupangire chisankho choipa chotere?
Komano pankhani ya maukwati achikondi, mukudziwa ngakhale zinthu zikuyenda bwanji, tonde imakusiyani. Muli pampando wa dalaivala, mukujambula njira ya moyo wanu, kukhala ndi zotsatira za zosankha zanu - ndipo ndi momwe munthu wamkulu aliyense ayenera kukhalira. Ukwati chifukwa cha chikondi ndi chisankho chomwe chimapangidwa ndi munthu yemwe ali ndi mphamvu pa moyo wake. Palibe mwayi woimba ena mlandu. Pakati pa zabwino zonse zaukwati wachikondi, iyi ndi yofunika kwambiri pakapita nthawi.
4. Kodi ubwino wina wa ukwati wachikondi ndi uti? Palibe zoyembekeza zosayembekezereka
Muukwati wachikondi, mumamudziwa bwino mnzanuyo ndipo mumadziwa zam'mwamba ndi zotsika zaulendo wawo waumwini komanso waukadaulo mpaka pano. Izi zikutanthawuzanso kuti mumadziwa zolephera za ndalama za wina ndi mzake ndipo mumamasuka nazo. Pankhaniyi, mwayi wofuna mwadzidzidzi kapena zoyembekeza zosayembekezereka ndizochepa. Simungayembekezere kuti mnzanuyo awononge bomba paulendo waukwati kapena kugula nyumba ya penthouse kuti mulowemo mutadziwa kuti sizingatheke.
Popeza palibe kuwonekera poyera pankhani ya maukwati okonzedweratu komanso chizolowezi cha anthu kukokomeza luso lawo pofuna kupanga chithunzi, zofuna ndi ziyembekezo zotere zimatha kukhala vuto lalikulu muubwenzi. Izi zingayambitsenso mavuto a nthawi yayitali ndipo mikangano imakhala yofunika kwambiri kuposa ukwati.
Ndipo chitetezo chazachuma ndi gawo lofunika kwambiri la machesi omwe mabanja ambiri akufunafuna mkwati kapena mkwatibwi 'wokhazikika'. Ukwati wosangalatsa komanso moyo womasuka (ngati siwosangalatsa) nthawi zambiri umayembekezeredwa. Maukwati achikondi amakhala bwino chifukwa cha kuwonekera pakati pa anthu pawokha. Kodi iyi si mfungulo ya migwirizano yopambana?
5. Ukwati wachikondi ndi wabwino chifukwa palibe chifukwa chochita mopambanitsa
'Ukwati waukulu wonenepa wa ku India' ndi umboni wa momwe makolo amadzifalitsira okha pazachuma chifukwa cha lingaliro lakuti ukwati wotukuka udzakondweretsa apongozi amtsogolo a mwana wawo, ndipo motero, kusunga chombo chaukwati kuti chisamenyedwe ndi miyala.
Amachita zimenezi ngakhale kuti palibe chitsimikizo chakuti kuwononga ndalama zambiri paukwati kungabweretse chimwemwe m’banja. Chimodzi mwazabwino zaukwati wachikondi paukwati wokonzekera ndikuti palibe chifukwa chotuluka ndikuponya ukwati kuti utsimikizire dziko kuti mumakondana wina ndi mnzake. Muukwati wachikondi, simufuna kuvomerezedwa ndi wina aliyense. (Mukudabwabe za ubwino wa ukwati wachikondi?)
Pankhani ya maukwati okonzeratu, maukwati opambanitsa amakhala odziŵikatu. Ndiukwati wachikondi, inu ndi mnzanu mutha kuyika phazi lanu ndikuyimitsa kuwononga zinthu izi. Mutha kulipiranso ukwati ngati nonse muli pa tsamba limodzi. Ngati ndinu munthu wothandiza, muli ndi yankho la funso lakuti, 'Kodi ndikwatire bwanji?' pomwe pano.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Kodi Zimatenga Nthawi Yaitali Bwanji Kuti Munthu Ayambe Kukondana mu Ukwati Wokonzedwa?
6. Kulimbana ndi kuipa kwa chikhalidwe cha chiwongo - chomwe chimapangitsa kuti ukwati ukhale wabwino kuposa ukwati wokonzeratu
Kodi mwamuna wodzilemekeza angalandire bwanji ndalama ndi zaulere kuchokera ku banja la mkazi wake, ndipo mkazi wodzilemekeza angagawire bwanji moyo wake ndi munthu amene amatero?! Mfundo yakuti ngakhale nthawi ndi nthawi ino, anthu samangopereka ndi kutenga chiwongo mopanda manyazi, koma akazi amazunzidwa ndi kuphedwa chifukwa cha izo, ndi chifukwa chokwanira kuvomereza kuti ukwati wachikondi ndi wabwino kuposa ukwati wokonzeratu.
Ubwino waukwati wachikondi ndi woti okwatiranawo atha kulimbana ndi vutoli lachikaleli chifukwa ubale wawo wakhazikika pa kulemekezana ndi kumvetsetsana. M’maukwati okomera anthu ena, mwayi woti zimenezi zitheke n’zosatheka chifukwa anthu amaposa maganizo a anthu. Ubwino umodzi waukulu waukwati wachikondi ndi ufulu womwe anthu amapeza popanga zisankho.
7. Kodi ubwino wa ukwati wachikondi ndi wotani? Kukondana
Anthu okwatirana amene akhala paubwenzi asanamange ukwati wawo amamanga ukwati wawo pa maziko a ubwenzi, umene umathandiza kwambiri kupanga nyumba kukhala malo osangalatsa. Chikondi, kukopa, kugonana ndi chilakolako zonse zili bwino kwambiri, ndipo ndizofunikira kwambiri paubwenzi wachikondi, koma ndi malingaliro awa aubwenzi ndi bonhomie omwe amawona okwatirana kupyola pazigawo zovuta ndi magawo otsika a moyo.
Ichi ndi chinthu chomwe chimakhala chovuta kuchipeza muukwati wokonzedweratu, makamaka pachiyambi. Pofika nthawi yomwe mudzakhala bwenzi la mnzanu wa muukwati, madzi ambiri amakhala atalowa pansi pa mlatho. Izi zingayambitse mkwiyo ndi mavuto amaganizo . Ngakhale ukwati woterewu utatha, udzakhala wosasangalatsa.
Ukwati wachikondi ndi wabwino chifukwa uli ndi maziko olimba a ubwenzi. Monga momwe Ann Landers ananenera mwanzeru, “Chikondi ndicho ubwenzi umene wayaka moto. Chiri kumvetsetsana kwachete, kukhulupirirana, kugawana ndi kukhululukirana. Ubwino waukwati wachikondi umapanga mndandanda wautali…
Ndiye, kodi ukwati wachikondi ndi wopambana kapena ukwati wokonzeratu? Zolembazo zili pakhoma, takupatsani zochulukirapo zokwanira zaukwati wachikondi paukwati wokonzekera, ndi momwe chisankhocho chili m'manja mwanu. Ndiponsotu, palibe chifukwa chabwino chokhalira m’banja kuposa kukhala ndi munthu amene mumam’konda ndi kumulemekeza kwa moyo wanu wonse.
Ibibazo
Kukonda chikondi njira yonse! Ngati mukufuna kukhala moyo wanu wonse ndi munthu amene makolo anu adakusankhani, ndiye kuti muyenera kukhala ndi mwayi wopeza mwana wamaloto anu.
Ubwino wa ukwati wolinganizidwa ndi wakuti banja lanu lidzakhutira ndi chisankho chanu, koma kuipa kumaphatikizapo dowry, ukwati waukulu wonenepa wa ku India umene simunapemphe, ndi kukhala moyo wanu wonse ndi munthu yemwe simungakopeke naye.
Munthu aliyense ali ndi nthawi ndi zaka zomwe akufuna kuti akwatire, koma zoona zake, 24-30 ndi zaka zabwino kwambiri.
51 Mafunso Amasewera Ongokwatirana kumene Pamagwirizano Apompopompo
Ukwati Wachikondi ku India: Zifukwa 9 Zomwe Zimakhala Zopambana
Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
Chabwino…Ndikhoza kukupatsirani zifukwa zina 14 zochititsa ukwati wokomera mtima kukhala wabwino kwambiri kuposa chikondi chaukwati.
Chonde musamafotokozere zonse…zimasiyana ndi anthu.