Indlela yokufumana ngaphezulu kweCrush-Iingcebiso ezili-18 ezisebenzayo

Ukufunda indlela yokuphelisa ukutyumza akuyona indlela elula yokunyathela. Ukutyumza akufani nokuthandana. Uthando yimvakalelo eyomeleleyo kwaye engaguquguqukiyo. Ukutyumza kuyaguquguquka kwaye ngaphezulu kwenguqulelo enqwenelekayo yohlobo lweqabane olifunayo. Ngaphandle kwemvelo yabo engathandekiyo, ukutyumza kunokulawula indawo yakho yengqondo ngokugqithisileyo.

Xa kunjalo, kunokuba lucelomngeni ngokwenene ukoyisa umntu ongakuthandiyo. Ngeminye imiqobo kunye nezithintelo endleleni, olu hambo luya kukugcina ukhubekile. Nangona kunjalo, kwiimeko ezininzi, yindlela efanelekileyo yokuthatha ukuba awuboni ikamva lokwenyani okanye ubudlelwane obunokubakho nalo mntu.

Ingcebiso yesayikholoji yengqondo Amjad Ali Mohammad (MSc Psychology, PG Diploma in Guidance and Counselling and Diploma in Community Mental Health for Psychologists), ogxile kwiindlela ezintsha, ezenzululwazi, kunye nezicwangcisiweyo kwiinkalo zempilo, imfundo, ubudlelwane, kunye neengcebiso emsebenzini, ulapha ukusinceda siqonde amaqhinga abalulekileyo orhwebo kulo mba.

Iingcebiso ezili-18 ezisebenzayo zokufumana ngaphezulu kweCrush

Ngokuqhelekileyo, uhlakulela umnqweno kumntu ofumana ekhangayo. Kunokuba mnandi kwiintsuku zokuqala apho sele ucinge ngayo ubudlelwane obugqibeleleyo, kodwa xa loo mntu evakalelwa ngendlela eyahlukileyo ngawe, unokujika abe yingozi engqondweni. Ukuba wena, okwesibini, yeka ukuzilungelelanisa kwaye ubone umfanekiso opheleleyo ukusuka kwinqanaba lenyani, unokuqonda ukuba umtsalane ongathandekiyo ulungile ukuwuyeka.

Kwelinye icala, unokuba ujongana nomntu otyumkileyo owakwenzakalisa kakubi okanye umntu osele eneqabane. Mhlawumbi ufumene ukutyumza kumajelo asekuhlaleni kwaye wavuma iimvakalelo zakho, kodwa bakukhokele endaweni yoko. Khawufan’ ucinge, ubungakanani bexesha olichitha ucinga ngomntu onokuthi okanye angakwazi ukukubuyisela iimvakalelo zakho, ngaba lifanelekile?

Njengombhali, uKevin Darné, wakha wathi, “Ukwala ngumhlobo ongazange wazi ukuba uyamdinga. Kudla ngokukongela ixesha nemali.” Ke, ngaphambi kokuba ubambe iimvakalelo ezinzulu ngalo mntu, sikuphathele ezi zakhono zili-18 zokumelana nokukunceda uqhubele phambili:

1. Zikhumbuze ukuba olu asilothando

Ukuthandana nomntu akuyonto yokuqala izigaba zobudlelwane. Imalunga nenkanuko kunye nomtsalane. Ukuncamathisela kusekude ukuba uhambe. Udibana nomntu omtsha. Indlela abahamba ngayo, abathetha ngayo, bahleka, ivele ikhuphe ingqondo yakho kwaye ibhabhathane elibhabhayo libuyele esuswini sakho.

Noko ke, kuthatha ixesha ukusingatha iimvakalelo zakho, ukubekela bucala uvuyo lokuqala. Nantso ke into ofanele uzikhumbuze ngayo. Ukuba nangona kuvakala njengothando okwangoku, mhlawumbi yenye nje intabatheko evela kumxube oyintloko wochulumanco kunye namahomoni - zombini onokuthi uziphembelele. Nantsi indlela u-Amjad awuchaza ngayo umahluko phakathi kokutyumza nothando:

• Ukutyumza kukuthabatheka okufutshane kunye okunzulu nomntu kwaye ubukhulu becala kunika ulonwabo lokwexeshana
• Kwelinye icala, uthando yimvakalelo enzulu yothando ehlala ihleli
• Ukutyumza kusekelwe kuphela kumtsalane womzimba kunye nemincili
• Uthando lusekelwe ekuhlonelaneni, ekunyamekeleni, ekuthembaneni, ekuqondeni nasekuthandeni

Ingcebiso eBono: Ukuba bebekhathalele, bebeya kuphinda babuyele, kodwa ukuba bebengenayo, akukho thando lubandakanyekayo. Ngaba loo flegi ebomvu ayinkulu ngokwaneleyo ukuba uhambe?

2. Indlela yokuyeka ukutyumza umfana / intombazana? Yiba nengqiqo

Masinyaniseke ngokukhohlakeleyo, sihlala sibumba iicrush ngokulula kuba asazi ngokwaneleyo ngabo. Ngokwesakholoji yengqondo yokutyumza, sihlakulela ukumthanda umntu xa sifaka iingcamango zethu kunye nemilinganiselo yethu kuye kwaye silindele ukuba babe neempawu ezithile.

I-aura yabo egqibeleleyo ithandela iintloko zethu, isigcina sibambekile kangangokuba asikwazi ukunikela ingqalelo kuzo naziphi na iinkcukacha ezithandabuzekayo. Andithi kufuneka ujonge iimpawu zabo ezimbi. Kodwa ukuba ucinga ngayo ngobulumko, uya kuqonda ukuba akukho sizathu sokukhohlisa umntu ongamazi nokumazi. Uphila kakuhle ngaphandle kwazo ukuba zikwenza ulibale ngezinto ezibaluleke ngakumbi ebomini.

Ingcebiso eBono: Bajonge ixesha elithile kwaye xa sele ubazi ngcono, iimfazwe kunye nazo zonke, sebenzisa ingqiqo ukufumana eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokuya phambili. Nyaniseka kuwe kwaye uxhathise ukuthandana nomntu ngenxa yokuba uziva unesithukuthezi okanye ujongeka kakuhle.

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3. Qalisa ukuthandana nabanye abantu

Umgama omncinci kunye nokutyala ngokwakho ngokweemvakalelo kumntu okanye enye into inokuba yindlela enye yokufumana ngaphezulu kokutyumza kwakho. Uzikhathaze ngantoni ngomntu ongakujongi ethekweni aze agqibele sele ekwenza uzive umbi? Le yeyona nto ilungileyo onokuyenza ukuba uyazibuza, "Indlela yokufumana isithandwa kumhlobo ofuna ukuhlala singabahlobo kwaye akukho nto ingaphaya?"

Okukhona ubabona, kokukhona unokutsaleleka kubo. Kodwa ukuba amandla nengqondo yakho zixakeke kwenye indawo, ekugqibeleni uya kuyeka ukuziphawula. Ke, yeka ukujonga ukutyumza kwakho ngexesha leklasi kwaye uye kufuna ezinye iindlela zokudibana namadoda/abafazi! Kukho iintlanzi ezininzi elwandle. Ukuba kukho omnye umntu onomdla kuwe kwaye ekwenza uzive ukhethekile, ungamhoyi.

Ingcebiso eBono: Sukuthandana nabanye ukwenza utyumke ube nomona. Yenzela ulonwabo lwakho kunye nempilo entle yengqondo. Vula ukuphonononga iinketho zakho kwaye wamkele ingqalelo oyifaneleyo ngokwenene.

4. Sebenzisa umthetho wokungaqhagamshelwa

Ukuba imeko yakho enomdla yokutyumza iyaphuma ngokupheleleyo esandleni, isenokuba lixesha lokuqinisa izinto kancinci kwaye ube nzima kuwe. Siyazi ukuba kunzima ukogqitha umntu othe wamthanda. Kodwa ukukusindisa ngakumbi usizi, sicebisa ukuba unike umthetho wokungaqhagamshelwa isithonga. Yamkele nje njengendlela yobomi. Kungekudala, uya kuqonda ukuba ibinzana elithi 'akukho mbono, ngaphandle kwengqondo' lisebenza ngokwenene.

• Inyathelo lokuqala kukuqhawula lonke unxibelelwano kunye nonxibelelwano kunye nokutyumza kwakho de iimvakalelo zakho ziphele
• Akukho mnxeba, akukho miyalezo, akukho nxibelelwano ngezihlobo, kwaye akukho kudibana kubo ngabom
• Ngeli xesha, zama ukunqanda ukusebenzisa kakubi utywala okanye ukujonga ngaphezulu kokutyumza kwakho imini yonke
• Hlala uxakekile, yenza indawo yazo zonke izinto ozithandayo, kwaye mhlawumbi udibane nabantu abatsha kwi-intanethi

U-Amjad uthi, "Ukungahoyi ukutyumza kunokuhamba nayiphi na indlela. Emva kokubanika ingqalelo kakhulu, ukuba ngokukhawuleza uyeka ukunika ukubaluleka okufanayo kwi-crush yakho kwaye endaweni yoko uqalise ukungabahoyi, baya kuzama ukusondela kuwe ukuze baqonde ukuba kutheni uhamba kude nabo. Kwelinye icala, basenokucinga ukuba awusenamdla kubo kwaye baya kumka kuwe.

Ingcebiso eBono: Ukuba uziva ulungile emva kokunganxibelelani nabo kangangexesha elithile, oko kunokuthetha ukuba yayiyintabatheko nje. Kungekudala, uya kuqonda ukuba awubaphosi emva kwayo yonke into kwaye uzive ulungele ukubuyela entsimini.

5. Khuphuka uye kubathandekayo bakho

"Indlela yokuphelisa i-crush?" uyazibuza. Xa uneemvakalelo ngomntu ongekho kuwe, oko kunokukwenzakalisa ukuzithemba kwakho kwaye kubangele ukudandatheka okukhulu. Ke, udinga indawo yokungena ukuze ukhulule zonke iimvakalelo kwaye uvumele iingcinga zakho zichitheke. Oku kuxa uphendukela kubahlobo bakho abasenyongweni abebesoloko beyinkqubo yenkxaso eyomeleleyo okanye kumntu onokuthi udlule kwimiba efanayo ebomini bakhe.

Ndithembe, ngamanye amaxesha oku akuncedi ngaphantsi kokubona ugqirha okanye umcebisi. Chitha ixesha nabahlobo bakho abasenyongweni okanye hamba uye kugqogqa endlwini kamama wakho – nantoni na oyibona ilungile kuwe. Cacisa ngokunyaniseka okupheleleyo ukuba uziva njani ungahoywanga, ungafaneleki, kwaye ungahoywa, kwaye uziva kakubi kangakanani xa ufuna ukucima lo mntu entlokweni yakho.

Ingcebiso eBono: Ukuthetha okusentliziyweni yakho kunceda kakhulu. Thetha nomntu omthembileyo kwaye ubukele intlungu isiya isuka kancinci kancinci.

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6. Mamela umculo owonwabileyo ukuba uziva ubambekile

Iingoma ezibuhlungu zenzelwe ukubandezeleka kweentliziyo ezibuhlungu. Ukuba uphatha le meko njengentliziyo epheleleyo ngokumamela umculo we-melancholic, unokubambelela kuloo ngqondo ixesha elide kunokuba ubucebe. Yixube. Ukuba u-corny njengam, unokwenza uluhlu lokudlalayo 'lokufumana ngaphezulu kokutyumza'. Okanye vele ufake irap ukuze uzigcine uphothiwe!

Ingcebiso eBono: Umculo unamandla okuphilisa. Omnye umculo omnandi unokukhokelela ekucingeni okusemgangathweni. Oku, kunokukunceda umlibale umntu ongenamvakalelo ngawe.

7. “Lithini ixabiso lam?” Gxila kuwe kwasekuqaleni

Shisa amehlo akho kunqulo lwakho lwezithixo olungagungqiyo lomnye umntu kwaye uqalise ukuchitha ixesha ucinga ngawe. Sihlala siyilibala ingcamango yokuzithanda xa sizixakekise ngeengcinga zomnye umntu. Lixesha elifanelekileyo lokuba uthathe iintambo kwaye unike ukuzithemba kwakho ukomelela okuqinileyo.

Ngaba uyakhumbula ukuba umgca ocatshulwe kakhulu nguStephen Chbosky, "Siyalwamkela uthando esicinga ukuba lufanelekile"? Yiloo nto eyenziwa kukungazithembi kwisigqibo sakho - uzinze kancinci. Nditsho uphando ibonise ukuba ukuzithemba kunempembelelo ephezulu kuzo zombini ukwaneliseka kobudlelwane kunye nolonwabo lweqabane lakho. Ke, ukufumana izityumza zakho ukuba zikusukele kwixesha elizayo, kuya kufuneka:

• Yenza uludwe lweempawu onazo ozithanda kakhulu
• Yiba ngqongqo ngakumbi kwimida yakho kwezothando kunye nobunye ubudlelwane; funda ukuthi 'hayi'
• Tyhila imida yakho, thatha imiceli mngeni emitsha, kwaye uzingce ngenkqubela yakho
• Yeka ngokungqongqo ukuzithelekisa nabanye
• Ziqhelanise neendlela zokuqinisekisa ezilungileyo yonke imihla

Ingcebiso eBono: Hlangana nabantu abatsha; yenza abahlobo abatsha. Kodwa gcina ukuzithemba kwakho engqondweni ngaphambi kokuba uqale ukusukela umntu. Ngamanye amaxesha, ukuze ufumane ukutshatyalaliswa kumhlobo ngaphandle kokumxelela, kufuneka uzikhumbuze zonke izizathu ozithandayo ngawe.

8. Indlela yokufumana ukutyumza okulahlileyo? Yenza umthambo

Uphambene, akunjalo? Ukuba ukwenza umthambo rhoqo kunokukunceda ukuba udlule kule fantasy yothando kwicala elinye? Xa singazilolongi ngokwaneleyo, sihlala siziva sityhafile kwaye sidangele. Ngamanye amaxesha, ukufumana ngaphezulu komntu osele enentombi / isoka kunokuba lula njengokukhulula ezo endorphins.

Ukuzilolonga kuya kwandisa iihomoni zakho ezonwabileyo, kukwenza ube namandla kwaye ube nomdla. Ngoko ke, ukuba yeka ukuzisizela, phuma entlokweni yakho kwaye ungene kwindlela yokuzilolonga, ungene kwimilo, kwaye uzive ulungile.

Ingcebiso eBono: Akunyanzelekanga ukuba umthambo ube ngamandla okanye ukhuphe amanzi. Yenza nje into ukuze intliziyo yakho ibaleke ukuze ingqondo yakho ikhululeke. Ngubani owayesazi ukuba ii-dumbbells zinokuba yimpendulo.

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8. Kucinge oku njengamava okufunda

Ukukhumbula amazwi akhuthazayo kaSteve Maraboli, umbhali, "Lila. Xolela. Funda. Qhubekela phambili. Iinyembezi zakho mazinkcenkceshele imbewu yolonwabo lwakho lwekamva." Xa sizifumana sikwimeko enesiphumo sesifundo, kufuneka sayame ekutolikweni okulungileyo kwale meko ikhankanyiweyo. Ukufunda rhoqo kukukhula.

Ukuba uziva ngathi uyinto engabonakaliyo, ngoko yazi ukuba akunalungelo lokuchitha ixesha kunye nendawo. Kulungile ukuba abakuthandi emva. Ukuba uye waphathwa ngokungafanelekanga, ngoko ke amava aya kukufundisa ukuba umeme uthando olufanele ngokwenene, kwaye ungathembeli ngokulula kwixesha elizayo. Musa ukukujongela phantsi okungekho sikweni. Musa ukuzibhaqa ngombuzo othi “Kutheni mna?” umbuzo. Endaweni yoko, funda kwaye ube yinguqulelo yakho engcono.

Ingcebiso eBono: Izifundo zobomi zikunceda ukuba ukhule njengomntu. Ukufumana ngaphezulu kokutyumza kumhlobo ngaphandle kokubaxelela okanye qhubela phambili ngaphandle kokuvalwa ukusuka otyumkileyo owakusebenzisayo, cinga ngayo njengelitye lokunyathela ebomini kwaye akukho nto.

10. Yenza into yakho

Ukugxila kuwe kunye nokuchitha lonke ixesha lakho usenza into yakho kunokuba yinto yonyango emangalisayo. Le ayisiyiyo enye yeendlela zokufumana ngaphezulu kokutyumza, kodwa ukoyisa nakuphi na ukusilela obukuphosayo ebomini. Nokuba kukuthenga kwi-Intanethi okanye ukupeyinta udonga olukruqulayo kwigumbi lakho - kuninzi onokuthi ukwenze. Funda isakhono esitsha, ulwele olo khuthazo olude. Ukumisa ukutyumza umhlobo, phuma apho kwaye uqale ukuyityumza emsebenzini!

Ingcebiso eBono: Zikhuthaze ukuba wenze izinto eziya kuba neziphumo ezincumisayo ukuze ube nesithuba esincinci kakhulu sokucinga ngokugqithisileyo malunga nokutyumza kwakho.

11 Musa ukuba krakra kukutyumza kwakho

Ukuba ukutyumza kwakho kukuzingca kunye nokuzingca, banokuthatha ithuba lengqondo yakho ye-lovelorn. Xa uziva uqhathiwe kwaye usetyenziswa, kunokuba nzima ngokwenene ukufumana ngaphezulu kokutyumza kwakho kumntu, ngakumbi ukuba uphume nabo okanye ukuba ubona rhoqo.

Inokukwenza ube nobutshaba. Ungafuna ukuba bahlawule ngayo yonke impatho embi. Iyabonakala ukusuka uphando ukuba kukho unxibelelwano olusondeleyo phakathi kwempindezelo kunye nokwaneliseka ngokweemvakalelo okanye isiqabu. Kodwa ayilohambo ifanelekileyo njengoko ishiya umnyango uvulekele ukuziphindezela, nto leyo enokukwenzakalisa ngakumbi. Yaye isazela sakho sinokubuya size sikulume kamva. Ingcali yethu ibonelela ngeengcebiso ezilungileyo ngexesha elinje:

• Zama ukomelela ngokwasemoyeni nasengqondweni, kwaye udibane nengcali yobudlelwane ukuba ucinga ukuba oko kunokunceda
• Zithembe kwaye ukhumbule ukuba ungcono kakhulu kunale meko inzima
• Ungalibali ukuba ukuziphindezela okanye ukuzama ukuziphindezela kwi-ex-crush ayiyi kuyiphelisa intlungu yakho; kunoko, bekuya kuwenza ube nzima ngakumbi lo mbandela

Ingcebiso eBono: Akukho sizathu sokuba muncu ngomntu ongenakamva naye. Kungathatha ixesha elide kunesiqhelo ukubalibala, kodwa ukubamba iimvakalelo ezingalunganga ngonaphakade akufanele kube kuluhlu lwakho.

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12. Guqula indlela ocinga ngayo ngokufuna ubudlelwane

Amaxesha amaninzi, sitsiba ukusuka kwelinye ukuya kwelinye ngenxa yeempazamo kwinkqubo yethu yokucinga. Sifuna ubudlelwane kunye nothando kakhulu kangangokuba xa sifumana umntu ofanele ixesha lethu, sityala amandla ethu kuloo mntu. Ukufuna ubudlelwane kunye nothando kuhle. Kodwa musa ukuyivumela ukuba ibe kukuzilahlela okubangela ukuba ubaleke.

UAmjad uthi: “Ukuba anivumanga ukuba ubuhlobo bunokubakho, ngoko ke ukuthand’ ukunyathela kwenu kunokuluphelisa ngokupheleleyo unxulumano lwenu nolo thando.

Ingcebiso eBono: Wonke umntu unelungelo elilindele kuye emaphikweni. Linda de uzifumane. Musa ukunyanzela izinto ngaphambi kwexesha lazo.

13. Bakhuphe kwimidiya yakho yoluntu

Imidiya yoluntu ithande ukuprinta izinto esizijongayo ngelixa siskrola kuluhlu lweengqondo zethu. Ngokuhlala ujonga imifanekiso yabo, uya kuhlala utsaleleka kubo. Ukuthintela oko, vala, cima, okanye ungalandeli - yenza nantoni na ekufuneka uyenzile basuse ngembeko kwimidiya yakho yoluntu ukutya. Oku kubaluleke ngakumbi ukuba ubunengxaki yendlela yokufumana ngaphezulu kokutyumza okubona yonke imihla kwi-Intanethi. Uzakuba ngcono kakhulu, sithembe.

Ingcebiso eBono: Kungcono ukucima nayiphi na into enokwenzeka yokubona ukutyumza kwakho ngokukhupha ityhefu kwisondlo sakho. Ngale ndlela, unciphisa utyekelo lwakho lokubona into abayenzayo.

14. Musa ukwenza izinto ukuze utsale umdla wabo

Enye yeendlela ezibuyela umva iintliziyo zethu ezilusizi zigqithise ukutyunyuzwa kukuzingenisa iindlela zokuziphatha ezifuna ingqalelo. Oku asikwenzi ngenjongo yokufuna ingqalelo yoko kulibazisekayo, kodwa ukubenza basinqwenele kanye xa siyekile ukubawela. Loo mvakalelo yokuba mkhulu ivela kwiimvakalelo ezingasonjululwanga yaye iya kukuthintela kakubi ukukhula kwakho. Musa ukujikeleza uzama ukuba yi-diva engafumanekiyo ukuze ubenze bakufune.

Ingcebiso eBono: Musa ukugqiba ukwenza izinto ezisileyo, ezizisolayo ngenxa yokuba umntu otyumkileyo akakuhoyanga. Zihloniphe, uhambe.

15. Zisa imbono kwinkxalabo yakho

Ukucinezela ngomntu ongamthandiyo nanjengoko ucinga ukuba wenza yinkcitho eyoyikekayo yamandla. Ngelishwa, siwela kulo mgibe ngokulula. Iyaphambana indlela umntu ongathethi kangako kuthi anokusenza sibe nexhala. Kubalulekile ukuba uzikhuphe ngononophelo ezi mvakalelo zingafunwayo. Esikhundleni sokulala ebhedini unentliziyo ebuhlungu, zikhumbuze ukuba ingaba esi sigaba sexeshana siya kuba njani, kwaye ubaluleke kangakanani kwaye uya kuhlala unjalo.

Ingcebiso eBono: Gcina iingcinga zakho kwimiba emikhulu phaya. Ngaba oku kuya kuba luncedo kuwe emva kwenyanga? Emva kweenyanga ezi-6? Emva konyaka? Iminyaka emibini?

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16. Indlela yokuphelisa ukuthandwa kumhlobo? Musa ukuvuselela ikhwele

Ukwenza isikhwele esidala ngokudanyaza entsha akuyi kubenza bafune ngakumbi. Ukuchasana nemveliso, kuya kukwenza ukuba uwe nzulu emngxunyeni womvundla ngokusoloko ucinga malunga nento abayicingayo. Ke ngenxa yokuba uAlan wayengowakho tyumza emsebenzini ngaphambili, akuthethi ukuba uqala ukuhleka kakhulu kunye noSteve kuzo zonke iintlanganiso zomsebenzi apho Alan naye ekhoyo. Khumbula, akukhathaliseki ukuba bacinga ntoni okanye benza ntoni na. Ukuzama ukuphembelela iingcinga zabo kulilize.

Ingcebiso eBono: Awunomona umntu ongena feelings for wena. Yixhathise loo mikhwa kwaye wenze izinto ezingcono ngobomi bakho. Akuyi kufuneka usebenze nzima ukwenza umntu ofanelekileyo njengawe.

17. Yithi ndlela-ntle kwiimeko ozicingelayo engqondweni yakho

Ukuba nochuku kakhulu kunokukhokelela kwimikhwa emikhulu yokuphupha emini. Usenokuqalisa ukuba nomfanekiso-ngqondweni wekamva kunye nabo. Okanye ufanekisela iimeko ezintle apho uthando lwakho lubuyiselwa khona kwaye baziintloko phezu kwezithende ekuthandweni nawe. Yima kanye apho kwaye uzame ukuqonda ukuba ubambeke njani kule nto Inqanaba lokuzimela. Kuba akukho nanye kwezi iyinyani okanye elungileyo kuwe.

U-Amjad uyachaza, "Ukucinga ngeentsuku ukuya kumlinganiselo othile kulungile ukuziva uyonwabile kwaye uzive wonwabile ngokutyumza kwakho. Kodwa xa kuba kuninzi kwaye kwenzeka ngamaxesha onke, oko kunokubangela ingxaki enkulu. Kunokukuphazamisa kwiinjongo zakho zobomi kunye nemisebenzi ebalulekileyo yemihla ngemihla njengomsebenzi wakho, umsebenzi, imfundo, intsapho, njl. Ukuba nemida kunye nemida kubalulekile."

Ingcebiso eBono: Gcina uthando celluloid ebomini bakho bay ixeshana. Buyela kwinyani – lutshintsho oluncinci ngokwenene, kodwa lunokuhamba umgama omde kakhulu ekugcineni unengqondo.

18. Funa uncedo lweengcali

Research ibonisa ukuba abantu abangamalolo ngokuphathelele iimeko zentsapho okanye kulwalamano lothando olunganelisiyo badla ngokufumana ulwaneliseko ngenxa yokuthabatheka. Ngoku, yinto entle leyo okanye ukukhalela uncedo? Yenza umntu acinge. Kunzima ukujamelana neemeko ezinjalo ngokweemvakalelo. Kuya kuba bubulumko kuwe ukuba ubhukishe idinga kunye nogqirha wesayikholojisti ngaphandle kokulibazisa.

Ingcebiso eBono: Akukho ntloni ngokucela uncedo. Ngoko ke, musa ukuyichasa xa uziva ufuna ukhokelo lobuchule. FYI, wethu abacebisi frIphaneli ye-om Bonobology basoloko belapha ukuze ndikuboleke uncedo.

Ke, zithini iingcinga zakho zokugqibela malunga nendlela yokuphelisa ukutyumza? Mhlawumbi sele uphonononga kwakhona indlela ovakalelwa ngayo ngaloo mntu. Usenokuqaphela ukuba nokuba iimvakalelo zisekho, uya kuba ulungile. Bangomnye umntu onomtsalane (kwaye mhlawumbi nohambelanayo). Kodwa kuya kubakho entsha, lowo ubuyisela iimvakalelo zakho, ungakhathazeki.

Eli nqaku lihlaziywe ngoJuni ka-2023. 

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