He Aratohu Hipanga-i-te-Hipanga mō te Hanga i tētahi Kōtaha Teití Whakaari e kore e taea te Ātete mō ngā Takakau o NYC

Pērā i ngā mea katoa i te Tāone o Niu Ioka, ka taea hoki e tō wheako whakaipoipo ipurangi te ahua kino. E toru miriona pea ngā tāngata takakau kei roto i te puna whakaipoipo, me tino kanapa tō kōtaha kia taea ai e koe te hopu i te aro o ngā hoa taumau pea, me te maha o ā rātou pāwhiri hei panuku. Mā tēnei whakataetae pakari ka nui ake te tūponotanga ki te kimi i te hoa taumau tika ki a koe, ka waiho koe kia raru ki te ngenge o te whakaipoipo me te kī, "He kino te whakaipoipo." Mā te ako ki te hanga i tētahi kōtaha whakaipoipo pai ka taea te whakakore i ēnei wero me te āwhina i a koe ki te tīmata. 

Whakaarohia, i roto i tēnei mara kī tonu, ko tō kōtaha te mea tuatahi hei whakaaro māu. Whakaarohia ō whakaahua kōtaha me tō koiora hei kaupapa pānuitanga māu. eHarmony e tohutohu ana Ko ōna kaiwhakamahi, ō whakaahua kōtaha me ētahi atu āhuatanga he "rite ki te whakapuakitanga o ō mahi whakaipoipo." Whakaotia ēnei āhuatanga, ā, ka tū motuhake koe i te rōpū. Mēnā ka hē te mahi, ka ngaro koe i roto i te raruraru. I roto i tēnei tuhinga, ka whakamārama mātou me pēhea te hanga i tētahi kōtaha whakaipoipo e kore e taea te whakahē, me te whakamahi i te kēmu whakaipoipo ipurangi hei painga mōu.   

Te Hiranga o tētahi Kōtaha Whakaipoipo Pai

He nui ake te hiranga o ngā kōtaha i NYC i mua. Me te miriona o ngā kaiwhakamahi taupānga i NYC, he torutoru hēkona noa iho hei miharo. E whakaū ana ngā rangahau i ngā tūponotanga: kotahi ako i kitea e 73% o ngā tāngata e whakaipoipo ana e kino ana ki ngā tātari taumaha i runga i ngā whakaahua, ā, ko ngā kōtaha me ngā kurī, ngā ngeru, ngā whakaahua haereere rānei he nui ake ngā urupare. Ko te tikanga o tēnei, kāore e taea te whakamahi i ngā whakaahua hoha, tawhito rānei. Kotahi te tāngata e whakaipoipo ana i NYC, nāna i tuhi tana tau o te whakaipoipo taupānga, i tohaina ki Reddit he nui ngā hua i puta mai i te utu i tētahi kaiwhakaahua ngaio. I kī ia he "tino nui te hokinga mai o te haumitanga" te haumi ki ngā whakaahua pai. 

I roto i tētahi mākete whakataetae pērā i a Manhattan, i a Brooklyn rānei, ka taea e ia pikitia me ia rārangi kōrero i roto i tō koiora te whakatau, te whakakore rānei i ō tupono ki te kimi i tētahi hoa pai. I roto i tētahi miro Reddit mō r/NYCdating, i kī mārama mai tētahi kaiwhakamahi: "I pekehia e au ngā kōtaha 10 me ngā kōrero whaiaro kāore i te tino mārama, engari i tuku karere tonu atu ahau ki tētahi nā te mea i kī mai rātou he pai ki a rātou ngā toa pukapuka tawhito me ngā tāmi i Queens." 

Whakaarohia pēnei: ​​ko tō kōtaha tō kaupapa hokohoko. E hiahia ana koe kia hokohokohia koe e ngā taupānga whakaipoipo, nō reira me whai i ngā tohutohu a te tohunga. Hei tauira, Te rangitaki a Luxy He whakatūpato kei roto i tō pukaemi whakaahua te "kōrero i tō pūrākau me te whakamārama i tō ao", ā, e akiaki ana hoki a eHarmony kia whakaatuhia tō tuakiri mā roto i ō hiahia me ō mōkai. I roto i tētahi tāone nui e tere ana te hanga i ngā whakaaro tuatahi, ka taea e te kōtaha koi, pono te wehewehe i waenga i ngā tini swipe me ngā tini taurite.

He Aratohu Hipanga-i-te-Hipanga mō te Hanga i tētahi Kōtaha Teití Pai—Mō ngā Takakau o NYC

Ki te kore tō wheako whakaipoipo i Niu Ioka e huri hei rārangi roa o ngā pouri me ngā hoa kino, me whakapau kaha koe ki te rapu huarahi hei hanga i tētahi kōtaha whakaipoipo pai. He mea nui tēnei nā te mea ko tō kōtaha te whai wāhi pai ki:

• Kōrerohia tō tuakiri me ōu wawata
• Kumea mai ngā tāngata e pai ana ki tō āhua noho
• Whakatakotoria he reo mō te kōrero, ā, tātarihia ngā rerekētanga

Anei me pēhea e tika ai:

1. Kōwhiria he whakaahua pane mārama, kounga teitei

koutou whakaahua kōtaha whakaipoipo Koia te mea nui. Koinei te whakatau a te tangata mēnā ka swipe matau rātou. Whakamahia he whakaahua kanapa, hou o koe anake, pai ake mēnā kāore he mōhiti kanohi, he pōtae rānei, e menemene ana, e āhua hoa ana rānei. Kia tino kitea tō mata, ā, kia pai te māramatanga. Āta karohia ngā whakaahua whaiaro i tangohia i ngā koki rerekē, i te haurua rānei kua taupokina e ngā waea.

Kōwhiria he whakaahua mahana, mārama hoki, e ngāwari ai te mōhio ki a koe. He ātaahua ngā kararehe, ngā tamariki rānei, engari kaua rātou e tahae i tō aro. Kia māmā noa iho. Anei ētahi whakaaro mō tō whakaahua kōtaha whakaipoipo:

• He whakaahua whaiaro, he whakaahua hoa rānei i tētahi tohu whenua pērā i te Piriti o Brooklyn, me koe e menemene ana
• He whakaahua mārama o tō upoko e kata ana, e titiro ana rānei ki te kāmera

Te pānui e pā ana: NYC Mahere Arataki mō te Whakawhanaungatanga: Ngā Tohu Paetae mai i te Teiti Tuatahi ki te Neke ki te Whare

2. Whakaaturia tō kanohi kia mārama

He mea whakamātau pea te tū me ngā mea, engari kia tino mōhio kei huna tō mata i ēnei mea. Hei tauira, ko te tangata e pupuri ana i tētahi waea kua hipokina ki te tohu Tinder i mua i tōna mata he āhua ngaro, ā, ehara i te mea pai. Kaua e huna i muri i ngā tātari, waea, mōkai rānei. Ko te ngā whakaahua tika mō tō kōtaha whakaipoipo ko ngā wā e kitea ai tō mata katoa, inā koa ō kanohi, ā, kāore he whakatikatika nui. E ai ki tā mātou i kōrero ai, tata ki te 73% o ngā tāngata e whakaipoipo ana e kino ana ki ngā whakaahua kua whakatikahia rawatia. Whaia te pono: ko ngā menemene maori me ngā whakaahua pono te mea pai rawa atu.

Ahakoa he mea ngahau te tāpiri i ngā waitohu, i ngā taputapu rānei pērā i te tangata e whakaatu ana i a Tinder ki tā rātou waea, kia tika te whakaahua kotahi, kia kitea ai koe. Ahakoa he mea whakamīharo ngā tātari, he maha ngā tāngata e hiahia ana ki ngā whakaahua pono. Anei me pēhea te whakatika i tēnei.

• Tonoa tētahi hoa kia tango pikitia i a koe i a koe e kōrero ana, e kata ana rānei
• He whakaahua whakaata koi kei waenganui o tō mata, he papamuri mārama, kāore he raruraru, ka pai hoki.

3. Whakaurua ngā momo rerekētanga ki roto i ō whakaahua

Kaua e tuku ake i ngā whakaahua upoko e ono e tata rite ana. Whakaranua kia whānui ake te pikitia. Whakamahia kia 4–6 ngā whakaahua e whakaatu ana i ngā taha rerekē o koe. Tāpirihia he ranunga o ngā whakaahua tinana katoa me ngā whakaahua mahi. Tāpirihia kia kotahi te iti rawa e whakaatu ana i a koe e mahi ana i tētahi mahi e pai ana koe: te hikoi, te tunu kai, te tākaro hākinakina, te haereere rānei. E tautoko ana te rangahau a Zoosk i tēnei, ā, e kitea ana e 51% o ngā tāngata takakau e kī ana ka swipe matau rātou ki ngā kōtaha kei roto ngā whakaahua haereere, ngā whakaahua whakangahau rānei. Mena he mōkai, he whakangahau rānei tāu, whakaaturia. He kōrero ēnei mōu. Me whakarite kia kounga teitei, kia whai tikanga hoki ia whakaahua. Hei tauira, 

• Kei te hikoi koe, kei te eke pahikara rānei i Central Park 
• Kei te wāhi kore here koe me tō kurī
• Kei te whare taonga koe, kei te kēmu hākinakina, kei te tunu kai rānei

4. Waihangahia he kōrero whaiaro whakahihiri me ngā taipitopito ahurei

Ko tō koiora, ko ō whakautu pātai rānei te wāhi e tiaho ai tō tuakiri. Kaua e kōrero pēnei i te "He pai ki ahau te kata" me te "Kei te titiro noa ki ngā mea kei waho". Engari, tuhia kia rite ki tāu e kōrero ana. Kia hihiri, kia motuhake hoki. Whakahuatia ō hiahia, ō āhuatanga rerekē, ō whāinga rānei. Whakaaturia te maia me te kore e whakamanamana. Mā te whakakatakata, mā te kōrero pakiwaitara rānei e āwhina. Mā ēnei mea iti ka waiho koe hei mea e maumaharatia ana, ka tīmata ai hoki ngā kōrero. Anei ētahi whakaaro hei āwhina i a koe ki te tito i tētahi koiora mō te kōtaha whakaipoipo e tuwhera ana:

• A tono taupānga whakaipoipo pērā i te "Me pakaru te hukapapa..." ā, muri iho ka whai i tētahi mea rerekē e pai ana ki a koe — te pekerangi, te kanikani salsa, te quiche kore-papa rānei
• Te whakapuaki i tō whāinga me te kī pēnei i te, "Kei te rapu koe i tētahi wāhi pīta pai rawa atu o NYC. He tūtohutanga?", e whakaatu ana i te momo noho me te tono whakautu
• Whakahuatia tētahi pūkenga, tētahi mahi whakangahau rānei: "E toru tau ahau e ako ana i te kitā. Pātai mai ki ahau he aha te waiata e tata ana ahau ki te mōhio!"

Te pānui e pā ana: Me pēhea te tūtaki ki ngā tāngata takitahi i roto i NYC Kāore he Taupānga Teití

5. Whakamāramahia te mea e hiahiatia ana e koe

Kia pono ki ō whāinga whakaipoipo. Ahakoa he "rapu i tētahi" whanaungatanga pono"ranei" he mea whakangahau noa iho, "he āwhina te māramatanga. I NYC, ko ētahi e hiahia ana ki te tūtaki ki ngā tāngata hou, ko ētahi e hiahia ana ki te marena. Me whakamōhio atu ki ngā hoa taumau tō tūnga. Mā tēnei ka karohia te whakapoauau, ā, ka tātarihia ngā mea moumou taima. Ka taea te waiho hei rārangi māmā pēnei i te "Kei konei ahau mō tētahi mea tūturu," te whakauru noa rānei ki roto i tō koiora. He mea pēnei rānei, 

• He hou ki NYC, ā, kua rite ki te kimi i tētahi hei tūtaki māu ki ngā wāhi parakuihi – e wātea ana ki ngā mea katoa mai i te kawhe ki te wā tonu.
• He miihini 5'9" te roa e rapu ana i tētahi hoa mahi hara mō ngā hikoi me ngā haerenga ki ngā whare taonga (Mōhiotanga: Kei te tino hiahia ahau ki te heke mai)

6. Whakamahia he reo māia, he reo pai

He mea ātaahua te hihiri. Whakahuatia ngā mea kia pai, kia pakari hoki ngā rerenga kōrero. Engari ko te "Kāore he whakaari" me te "E kino ana ahau ki ngā kēmu," me kī atu te mea e pai ana ki a koe. Kaua e whakarārangihia he maha rawa ngā "ture" whaiaro, ngā ture rānei. ngā kaiwhakakore hononga. Tērā pea he ahua kino te ahua o ēnā. Kia noho noa, pērā i te kōrero ki tētahi hoa. He mea nui tēnei panonitanga ngawari, ā, anei me pēhea e taea ai e koe te whakatutuki:

• Whakawhitia "Kaua e tuku karere kuputuhi mai i te 2 i te ata" ki te "Tuku karere kuputuhi mai ina mutu tō inu kawhe o te ata!"
• Engari kaua e kī atu "Kāore au i te pai ki ngā pā waina," engari me kī atu, "E harikoa ana ahau ki te whakamātau i te pā waina hou rawa atu."
• Kia aro ki ngā otinga: ki te uaua te whakaipoipo, me kōrero mā te ngahau. Hei tauira, "Whakaakona mai ō pūkenga oranga i runga i te whenua raro whenua, ā, māku e whakaatu ki a koe te wāhi ramen pai rawa atu."

7. Kia noho koe 

Kaua e whakaari i a koe anō he tangata kē, kaua hoki e whakanui rawa i a koe anō. Ki te pai koe ki ngā pukapuka pakiwaituhi, kōrerotia. Ki te mea he tangata aroha koe ki ngā kurī i roto i te tāone ngeru, whakahuatia. Mā te pono ka kukume mai i ngā tāngata tika. He nui ngā rūpahu i NYC, nō reira kia tū pakari koe mā te pono. Anei te mahi:

• Tāpirihia he whakaahua haere o tētahi tāone i toro atu koe, kaua e tuku i tētahi whakaahua moemoeā i tangohia mai i Google
• Ki te mea mai ō hoa ko koe te "kaihanga hupa heihei" i roto i a rātou, whakahuatia. "He tangata e kawe tonu ana i te hupa heihei ki ō hoa."
• Kōrerohia ō āhuatanga tūturu: "Kua whakamātauria e au ngā wāhi pīta katoa o Kuini, e rapu ana i te poro pīta tino tika."

Te pānui e pā ana: Me pēhea te whiriwhiri i te taupānga whakaipoipo pai rawa atu NYC E ai ki tō āhua noho

8. Whakamahia ngā pikitia māia engari he pono 

Whakatairangahia te kounga i te rahinga. He pai ake te whai i ngā whakaahua pai e whā i ngā whakaahua noa e tekau. Tangohia ngā whakaahua pōuri, nui rawa te mārama, te kore rānei e kaha. Pātai atu ki a koe anō: Ka whakatata atu koe ki tēnei tangata i te ao tūturu? Ki te kore, tangohia anō te whakaahua. Ā, ki te mea he tino hiahia koe ki ō whāinga whakaipoipo, kāore he kino ki te whakapau moni iti hei tiki whakaahua whakaipoipo ipurangi pai. Āe, whakahoutia i ia wā. Ka taea e te whakaahua hou te whakaoho anō i te hunga mātakitaki. Anei ētahi atu tohutohu mō te hanga i tētahi kōtaha whakaipoipo pai:

• Tukuna mai kia 4–6 ngā whakaahua (kaua e nui atu) kua paahitia e koe tō whakamātautau kanohi. Mēnā he whakaahua e whakamā ai koe, whakawhitia.
• Whakamahia he tātari taupānga kia iti, kaua rānei e whakamahia rawatia. He tino ātaahua ake te āhua taiao
• Mena kua tapahia tō makawe, kua hangaia rānei he momo kāhua hou, whakahoutia tō whakaahua kia ōrite ki taua momo.

9. Te reka me te wā o te rohe

Whakaaturia mārire tō aroha ki NYC. Whakahuatia tō wāhi noho, tō mahi rānei tino pai ki NYC. Kei te eke pahikara koe i Prospect Park, kei te mōhio rānei koe ki tētahi whare kawhe ngaro? Ka kukume aua kōrero iti i ngā hoa noho o te rohe. Anei te huarahi:

• Tāpirihia he rārangi ki tō koiora pēnei i te "Ngā ata Rāhoroi = ngā pēkere i te taha hauauru o runga" (mēnā he pono!)
• Whakahuatia he kaupapa pukumahi ki te taha pai. "He rōia nō NYC e kai parakuihi ana i te 5 i te ata hei tīmatanga pai"
• I roto i ngā whakaahua, tāpirihia he wāhanga o te papamuri o te tāone hei whakaatu i tō whakapehapeha ki te tirohanga o te rangi.

10. Whakatikatikahia, whakahoutia hoki tō tuhinga

Ka pā kino pea ngā hapa tuhituhi me ngā wetereo rerekē. Pānuihia tō koiora i mua i te tiaki. Kia poto, kia rite ki te kōrero ngā rerenga kōrero. Nā te mea ka whakamahia e ngā taupānga pēnei i a Hinge ngā tohutohu hei utu mō ngā koiora roa, whakautua mā te auaha me te mārama. Ā, whakatikahia te tuhi. Ahakoa kāore e hiahiatia kia tino tika tō wetereo (ehara i te whakamātautau reo Pākehā me tino angitu koe), me whakaatu koe he tangata mārama. Ahakoa kotahi te hapa tuhituhi, te emoji rānei ka taea te whakararu i tō kaha. Whakahoutia tō koiora i ētahi wā: ko ngā hiahia hou, ngā mahi hou, tae atu ki tētahi reo hou ka noho hou tonu koe.

• Ki te pātai mai tētahi pātai "Koinei te whakaaro kino rawa atu kua pā mai ki ahau...", homai he whakautu whakakatakata engari tirohia anō mēnā he tika (kaua he katakata tā!)
• Tuhia anō tetahi rerenga kōrero e ahua mākū ana. Mena ko "Aroha ana ahau ki te tāone" anake tāu rārangi, whakawhānuihia mā te whakamahi i te take, me te pēhea rānei.
• Whakaaturia ngā whakaahua o te wā tika—he pikitia kāri hararei i te marama o Tīhema, he pikitia takutai raumati i te marama o Hūrae

Te pānui e pā ana: Mahere Rā mō ia Wā NYC

11. Tikina ngā urupare mai i te kōtaha

Hei whakamutunga, kaua e wehi ki te pātai atu mō ngā whakaaro o waho. Ka taea e te takirua kanohi hou, inā koa te tangata o te ira tangata e arohia ana e koe, te kite i tētahi whanonga selfie i ngaro i a koe, te mihi rānei ki tētahi whakautu tere kāore koe i te tino mōhio. He maha ngā kaitātaki i NYC e tuku ana i ngā whakaahua kōtaha ki ngā huihuinga pēnei i a Reddit hei tohutohu. Ko te tikanga, me whakaaro ki tō kōtaha he tauira, ā, kia rite ki te whakarerekē i runga i ngā whakautu. Kāore koe i te tino mōhio me pēhea te tiki tirohanga hou mō tō kōtaha? Whakamātauria ēnei:

• Whakaaturia tō kōtaha ki tētahi hoa i a koe e kawhe ana, ka pātai atu, "He aha tāu e whakaaro ai mōku nā tēnei?"
• Whakawhitiwhitia tētahi whakaahua ki tētahi hoa, ka pātai atu, "Ko wai tāu e swipe matau ai ki konei?"
• Whakamātauria te whakawhiti i tētahi whakautu tere ki tētahi mea whakakatakata ake, ka whakataurite i ngā ōritenga

ō rangaranga

He toi, he pūtaiao hoki te hanga i tētahi kōtaha whakaipoipo pai o NYC. Kia pono, kia whakamere, ā, kia tautokona ki ngā pikitia kounga. Ko te whāinga he kukume i te momo tangata e pai ana ki a koe, ahakoa he kaiwhaiwhai Broadway, he kaitātari Wall Street rānei. Ngā taupānga pēnei i eHarmony a Luxy Me whakaatu ko te pono me ngā hiahia mārama ka pai ake te hoa. Ina whakaritea ngā mea katoa—ngā whakaahua pono, te mura o te tuakiri i roto i ngā tuhinga, me te reo hoa—ka kite koe i te tirohanga whakaipoipo o NYC e anga atu ana ki a koe. Kia ora koutou!

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Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

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