He uaua ki te mārama ki te kare ā-roto e puta mai ana i a koe ina whakawhanake wawe koe i tētahi hononga ki tētahi. Kātahi ka kore e taea te kore e hiahia ki te noho tahi me tēnei tangata, me te moemoeā mō tētahi hononga tino pai pea kei a kōrua. He rite tonu te āhua o te kukume aukume i waenganui i te tokorua. Kia pā ki a koe, koinei anake te mea ka whakakī i tō hinengaro.
Kāore e taea te tino mōhio mēnā kei te rongo koe i te kukume aukume ki tētahi mā te tirotiro i ia inihi o ā rātou whakaahua taupānga whakaipoipo. Ko te huarahi anake hei whakarite kei te kukume kōrua tetahi ki tetahi, pērā i te aukume, ko te whakatū kōrero me te tirotiro i te pai o tō kōrua hononga.
Engari, me pēhea mēnā ka peke atu ngā tohu i tō mahunga, ā, ka ngaro i a koe tētahi hoa wairua pea? Me pēhea mēnā ka he tō whakaaro ki te kukume aukume ki tētahi hei aroha noa, ehara i te mea e pupuri ana i tētahi taumaha? Ko te kukume aukume kore e taea te whakamārama o te tangata ka waiho pea koe kia whakaaro he aha te mea hauora, he aha te mea kāore. Kei konei mātou hei āwhina i a koe kia kore ai e tukua tetahi mea utu nui kia mawhiti i ō maihao.
Me pēhea te mōhio ki te kukume aukume i waenganui i te tokorua – 11 ngā tohu
Ripanga o Ihirangi
I tētahi o ngā pō kāore a Aymeric i whakaaro ka whiwhi ia i tētahi hoa, ka kite ia i te kōtaha a Gina i runga i tana taupānga whakaipoipo. I miharo ia, i te ōritetanga o rāua, ā, ka haere te hinengaro moemoeā o Aymeric. Ahakoa kua whakatau ia kāore ia e hiahia ki te noho i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga mō ngā rā kei mua, kāore i taea e ia te ārai i te kare o te aroha i te kitenga tuatahi i tā rāua rā.
E ono marama te roa o tā rāua kōrero, engari i ia wā ka rongo a Aymeric kua tata rawa atu a Gina. I ia wā ka ngana ia ki te wehe i a ia anō, ka hoki whakamuri rāua tetahi ki tetahi me te whakapono nui atu i tērā i te wā whakamutunga. He mea nui ia hui, ia wā ngoikore i whakanui ake i tō rāua whakawhirinaki, ā, ko te kukume aukume i waenganui i te tāne me te wahine i mahi i te toenga.
I mōhio a Gina ka rongo ia i te kukume mai ki a ia, ā, ka āta whakaae a Aymeric kāore e taea te wareware i te kukume aukume kore e taea te whakamārama o te tangata. I te mutunga, i te kitenga kāore e taea e rāua te noho tawhiti tetahi i tetahi, ka whakatau rāua ki te whakarērea te tūpato ka tīmata i tētahi whanaungatanga hou . Mai i taua wā, he maeneene te haere.
Pērā tonu, i whakaaro rātou ehara i te mea uaua ki te whakatū hononga pēnei ki tētahi. Heoi, ko te mea uaua ko te whakarite kia kitea e koe. I roto i tō hiahia nui, kia kaua e whakapohehe i ngā tohu o te atawhai hei momo aroha e hiahia ana koe. I ētahi wā, ka tere tātou te taka ki te tangata i te tohu tuatahi o te atawhai, nō reira kāore, ahakoa i mihi rātou ki tō kākahu, ehara i te mea kei te tino hiahia rātou ki a koe.
Ko ngā tohu o te kukume i waenganui i te tokorua ka titiro tika mai ki tō kanohi, engari tera pea ka ngaro atu rātou i a koe, pērā i a Aymeric. Ina koa mēnā kāore koe i te rapu i a rātou i te tuatahi. Ko te mea ka mōhio koe, kua noho koe hei hoa-rohe nā te mea kāore koe i whakahoki mai i tetahi o ngā hiahia i tukuna mai ki a koe.
Hei whakarite kia mau tonu te hononga, kia mōhio ai mēnā kei te rongo koe i te kukume aukume ki tētahi, mā ēnei tohu e whai ake nei koe e āwhina i tō haerenga. Kia mōhio koe kei te pai te haere o tētahi mea, ko tāu noa he whakaipoipo i a rātou me te miharo i a rātou . He ngāwari noa iho, tika?
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1. Ka kite koe i te harikoa i runga i ō rātou mata
Ki te harikoa tēnei tangata ki te kite i a koe, e kore e taea e rātou te huna. Ka ataata mai i te taringa ki te taringa tōna mata i te meneti ka kite rātou i a koe, ā, ki te whai mai he awhi mahana, ka mōhio koe he pono te harikoa mō te kite i a koe. Ka tino pā mai te harikoa i te meneti ka kite koe i tēnei tangata. He tika ki te kī, tera pea ka pekepeke tō ngākau.
Ina he kukume aukume i waenganui i ngā hoa wairua, kāore e kore ka koa rātou ki te kite tetahi i tetahi. Ka kite koe i a rātou e ngana ana ki te kōrero ki a koe, ahakoa kei roto koe i tētahi rōpū. Ka kite koe i a rātou e kōrero ana ki a koe me te atawhai atu i tētahi atu, ā, ka rongo koe i te puhaketanga o te harikoa.
Ko te kukume aukume e kore e taea te whakamārama o te tangata ka hua ake he take e kore e taea te whakamārama mō tō harikoa. Ki te kite koe i a koe anō e menemene ana me te kore e taea te pupuri i te wā e kite ai koe i a ia, kia tino mōhio koe ki te nui o tō aroha ki a ia.
2. Mā ngā hononga pūngao i waenganui i te tokorua ka whakatairanga i tētahi hononga tere tonu
Ko te hononga tere kua taunga koe ki te kite i roto i ngā kiriata, arā, e rima hēkona te roa o te titiro kanohi hei whakakī i te ngākau aroha, heoi, heoi anō, i roto i ngā kiriata anake e tika ana. Ahakoa ka tere te hononga o kōrua, kaua e whakaaro ka tere tonu pērā i te kī a Ryan Gosling.
Kia kōrero pai kōrua tetahi ki tetahi, ā, kia whakama ai tetahi ki tetahi , tera pea ka ngaro te wā, ka mōhio kei te tino pai tō kōrua noho tahi. Kāore te kukume aukume i waenganui i te tokorua e puta mai me te kore he hononga kaha, nō reira kia tūpato ki tēnei.
3. Ka tuwhera kōrua tetahi ki tetahi, me te kore e whakaroa
Ko te nama me utu e koe, ko ngā rā kati me tutuki e koe, ko ngā mahi o te whare me mahi e koe, ka warewarehia katoatia ina tata koe ki tēnei tangata. Ka taea e koe te rongo kei te pai rātou ki a koe, ā, kāore he raruraru ki a rātou te whakatuwhera i ō rātou whakaaro ki a koe.
Ehara hoki i te mea māu, nā te mea ko tāu e hiahia ana ko te whakapuaki i ō ngoikoretanga ki tēnei tangata. Ina noho tahi koe me rātou, ka rite koe ki te mea kāore he hē e puta. Me te mea nei ka whakautehia, ka māramahia hoki ngā mea katoa e kōrerotia ana e koe ki tēnei tangata. Pērā anō hoki ō rātou whakaaro ki a koe, ā, e kore e rite ki te mea kāore rātou e rangona ana, e whakautehia ana rānei.
Ina ka tīmata te kukume i a koe ki tētahi, me tere tonu te mōhio ki a ia. Nō reira, ka rere te kōrero me te nui o te inu waina, ā, ka mutu pea ka moe noa kōrua i te pō, ka kōrero noa iho.
4. He hiahia pono tō rātou ki te mōhio ki a koe
Ki te mea he tino hiahia tō kōrua tetahi ki tetahi, pērā i ngā aukume, ka hiahia koe ki te mōhio ki te tangata kē, tika? Ka kite koe i tēnei e whakamaoritia ana ki ā rātou mahi me ngā pātai e pātaihia ana e rātou ki a koe. Ka whai hiahia ā-roto kōrua ki te mōhio ki ngā mea katoa e pā ana ki te tangata kē.
Tērā pea ka pā mai tētahi o aua pō e kōrero ana kōrua tetahi ki tetahi, e mōhio pai ana tetahi ki tetahi. Ko te momo pō e ngaro ai te aro ki te wā, ā, ko te mea anake e kitea ana e koe ko tēnei hoa tino pai kei mua i a koe. He kukume aukume tēnā māu.
Heoi, ki te mea he pātai motuhake ā rātou, pērā i te ingoa o tō whaea i te wā i a ia e tamariki ana, te ingoa o tāu mōkai tuatahi, te ingoa rānei o tō kura tuatahi, kei te tinihangatia koe, e hoa, kāore i te kitea te aroha.
5. Ina kei te kukume koe i tētahi ki tētahi, kāore he whakahē e pā ana ki a koe
He tino pai te noho tahi a kōrua, ā, ka taea e kōrua te noho ko kōrua anō, me te kore e manukanuka ki ngā whakaaro o te tangata mō kōrua. Kia puta he kukume aukume i waenganui i ō kōrua hoa aroha, ka ngaro atu ō kōrua āwangawanga. Kāore koe e manukanuka kei tino pai ō makawe, kei kitea rānei te kiri i tō ihu.
Ka noho haumaru koe i roto i tēnei rohe kore whakahāwea kua whakatūria e kōrua. Ka kitea tēnei mā te kite i te ngāwari o te whanonga a tēnei tangata i mua i a koe. Ki te nui rawa tōna manukanuka mō te miharo i a koe, ka pakari rātou, ā, e kore e tino pai te rere o te kōrero. Kia pūmau te hiko i waenganui i te tāne me te wahine, i tētahi atu rānei, kāore koe e manukanuka ki ngā hua o te kōrero whakahihi. Me haere tonu!
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6. He nui te takaro takaro ina rongo koe i te kukume ki a ia
Ahakoa te kōrero i tētahi mea whakahihiri, ki te mea he kukume aukume kei waenganui i te tokorua, kāore koe e mangere ki te tuku karere whakahihiri. I ētahi atu wā, kua whakaaroaro pea koe ki tāu e kōrero ai mō ētahi haora i mua i te whakatau ki te kōrero i tētahi mea kāore e whakaohooho i ngā kare ā-roto. I konei, ka nui ake tō maia, me te maia hoki o te tangata e kōrero ana koe ki a ia.
Kāore pea koe e hiahia ki te kōrero ki ō hoa i mua i te tuku karere whakaipoipo, pērā i tāu i mahi ai ki ō hoa katoa. I tēnei āhuatanga, me te mea kāore he he. Mā te kukume i a koe ki tētahi ka ngaro atu ō āwangawanga katoa, ā, e mōhio ana tātou katoa, ko te whakapono ki a koe anō te mea anake e hiahiatia ana e koe ina ngana ana koe ki te whakaipoipo.
7. E rite ana koe ki te mea kua roa kōrua e mōhio ana tetahi ki tetahi
I waenganui o te kōrero, tera pea ka moemoeā koe, ka whakaaro, "I hea koe i tōku ao katoa?" Ina he kaha te hiahia i waenganui i te tokorua, ko te whakamarie me te ngāwari e pā ana ki a koe ka meinga koe kia whakaaro kua mōhio koe ki tēnei tangata mai i tōu ao katoa.
Ina koa kua rite kē te āhua ki te kōrero tetahi ki tetahi i tetahi i te mea kotahi. Mā te kukume aukume i waenganui i te tokorua ka puta he āhua mōhio, ka rite koe ki te mea kua whakaritea kia noho tahi kōrua i ngā wā katoa. Kāore he raruraru ki te whakatū hononga kare ā-roto mai i te tīmatanga, ā, kāore koe e whakaaro rua i mua i te noho ngoikore ki a ia.
Me te mea nei ka taea e koe te noho ko koe tonu i a rātou, ā, e mōhio ana koe kāore rātou e whakahe ana i a koe mō tēnā. Kaua e whakararuraru i te katoa mā te kī i tētahi mea kuware pēnei i te "Aroha ana ahau ki a koe" i te wā tuatahi, nā te kukume aukume kore e taea te whakamārama o te tangata ka whakaaro pea koe he whakaaro pai tēnā (ehara i te mea tika).
8. Ka whakamōhio atu rātou ki a koe i te nui o tō rātou aroha ki a koe
Ā, ka taurite katoa aua kare ā-roto. I taua wā tonu, me te mea nei i roto i te pō kotahi, ka nui ake tō kōrua aroha tetahi ki tetahi i tetahi atu mea. Ka whakamōhio atu kōrua tetahi ki tetahi i te nui o tō kōrua hiahia kia harikoa te tangata, me te aha hoki e pai ana kōrua ki te mahi hei whakatutuki i tēnā. Ka ngana kōrua ki te kimi me pēhea te whakaatu i tō kōrua aroha.
Me te mea kua ngaro whakarere te hiranga o ngā mea katoa o tō ao, ā, ko tēnei tangata kei waenganui o te atamira. He maha ngā wā ka uru mai te aroha ki roto i tō ao, ka turaki i ngā tatau katoa i tōna ara, ā, kāore he huarahi kē atu i tua atu i te hinganga o te aroha.
9. He āwangawanga ā-ira tangata
Kāore e kore ka kitea he taumata kaha o te taumahatanga ā-ira tangata i roto i tēnei hononga. I te taha o ngā kōrero mutunga kore me te taiao kore whakahē, he mea maori noa iho te hiahia o kōrua ki te whai hononga ā-ira tangata, inā koa kua tino pai kē kōrua tetahi ki tetahi.
Kia kaha ake te maia o te whakaipoipo i ia meneti, kāore e taea te huna i te hua o te whakaipoipo. Engari, ehara i te mea ko te whanaungatanga ā-ira anake te painga ka puta mai i te aroha. Koinei tētahi o ngā wāhanga tino ngahau o te wheako katoa *kinoki*.
Ā, ina "mōhio" koe ki te taumahatanga o te moepuku , he nui te tūponotanga ka arahi atu ki ngā wheako moepuku tino whai hua. "Kei te rongo ahau i te kukume ki a ia ahakoa kei te moenga māua," te kōrero a Jessy ki a mātou, e kōrero ana mō tana whanaungatanga hou ki a Jeff.
"Ehara i te mea ko te wā anake e wehe ana māua, e kōrero ana rānei māua, engari kei te tino hiahia ahau ki a ia ahakoa i a māua mahi tino piripono," tāna tāpiri. Kāore māua e oati ana ki tētahi mea ka waiho koe kia pōuri, kia pōhēhē i runga i te moenga, engari e tino mōhio ana māua tera pea ka taea e koe te whakatutuki i tēnā.
10. Ina rongo koe i te kukume aukume ki tētahi, ka kite koe i ngā tohu pai o te reo tinana
Mena kei te tīmatanga tonu koe ki te mōhio ki tēnei tangata, ā, kāore anō kia tīmata te whakaipoipo, he huarahi pai ki te mōhio kei te aro atu tētahi ki a koe, mā te aro atu ki tā rātou reo tinana. Ko ngā tohu pai o te reo tinana ko te pupuri i te titiro kanohi, te tū tuwhera me te kore e whiti i ngā ringa me ngā waewae, te whero me te tuwhera o ngā nikau.
He nui te āwhina o te kite i ngā mea iti pēnei i a koe e ngana ana ki te hopu i ngā tohu o te kukume i waenganui i te tokorua. Heoi, ki te mea kei te uiui mahi koe, ā, ka kite koe i ēnei tohu katoa, nā te mea ko te tangata kē e hiahia ana ki te mahi, ehara i a koe. Nō reira, he mea nui te horopaki!
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11. Mā ngā hononga pūngao i waenganui i te tokorua ka piri tahi rāua
Ā, he aha kōrua te piri tahi ai? He pai ki a kōrua te noho tahi! I ngā rā e wātea ana tēnei tangata, tera pea ko koe te tangata tuatahi ka waea atu rātou ki te noho tahi. Ina kore kōrua e noho tahi ana, kei te kōrero kōrua i runga waea.
Ka kitea e koe anō e rapu huarahi ana kia tūtaki ai koe ki tēnei tangata i ngā wā katoa e wātea ana. Mā te kukume aukume i waenganui i te tāne me te wahine ka kore koe e aro nui ki te take e tūtaki ai koe ki a rāua, ko tāu e manukanuka ana ko te noho tahi me ia, i ngā wā katoa e wātea ana.
He pono, kāore e taea te whawhai i te hiahia ki te tūtaki ki tēnei tangata. Ina rongo koe i te kukume aukume ki tētahi, ehara i te mea ngāwari ki te wareware. Nā te mea, e hia ngā wā kua kite koe i tētahi i roto i ngā kiriata e ngana ana ki te whakakahore i te kare o te aroha i te kitenga tuatahi , ā, ka kite noa i a rātou e hinga kino ana? Kaua hoki e ngana ki te whawhai ki tēnei kare. Ahakoa a Mohammed Ali e kore e toa i taua whawhai.
Kia kite koe i te kukume aukume ataahua i waenganui i te tokorua e moemoeā ana te tini, ka kaha ake i ngā mea katoa kei a koe. Ko te tumanako mā roto i ngā tohu kua whakarārangihia i runga ake nei, kāore koe e whakaaro hē he mea paitini, engari he wheako makutu. Ki te kitea koe i waenganui i te kukume aukume kaha ki tētahi, tukua atu, kia pai te haere!
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Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
