Kei te kite koe i ngā tohu e pai ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe? Kaua e manukanuka, ehara ko koe anake te tangata e pāngia ana e tēnei. E ai ki tētahi rangahau, 54% o ngā kaimahi o Amerika kua aroha ki tētahi hoa mahi, 41% kua tonoa kia haere tahi rāua e tētahi hoa mahi, ā, 23% kua tonoa kia haere tahi rāua. I runga i ō whakaaro mō tēnei tangata, ka taea e ēnei tatauranga te whakatenatena, te whakakī rānei i a koe ki te koretake o tētahi kōrero whakararuraru kei te haere mai.
Ahakoa kei te pai koe ki tēnei tangata, ā, kua roa koe e whakaaro ana ki te tono kia haere tahi me tētahi hoa mahi, ki te tatari rānei kia neke mai ia, me tino mōhio tonu koe ki ōna kare ā-roto mōu. Hei whakatutuki i tēnā, ka tukuna atu e mātou he whakamārama mō ngā tohu mārama e aroha ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe.
15 Ngā Tohu e Pai Ana Ki A Koe Tō Hoa Mahi Tāne
Ripanga o Ihirangi
He hoa aroha, he whakaipoipo rānei tō hoa mahi? He tino uaua ki te mārama ki te aroha ki te mahi. Mō te uaua o te tīmata i ngā whanaungatanga i te wāhi mahi, he Reddit I tuhituhi te kaiwhakamahi, "He uaua tēnei momo āhuatanga mō ngā tāne. Nā te āwangawanga mō ngā kaupapa here mō te whakatoi ira tangata, kāore e taea e mātou te kōrero tika." E ai ki rangahau, tata ki te haurua (41%) o ngā kaimahi kāore e mōhio ki te kaupapa here a tā rātou kamupene e pā ana ki ngā whanaungatanga ā-tari.
Nō reira, me i tika ō whakaaro, ā, e tino pai ana tēnei hoa mahi ki a koe engari kāore ia e mōhio me pēhea te neke. Tērā pea kei te tuku tohutohu ia ki a koe. Tērā pea kei te tātari nui rawa koe i ngā mea iti o tō taiao mahi. Ko koe tana i aroha ai, kei te ngaro noa rānei i roto i tōu ake mahunga? He aha ngā tohu e pai ana tētahi hoa mahi ki a koe engari kei te hunaia e ia? Kia kitea tātou.
Te pānui e pā ana: 15 Ngā Tohu o te Whakaaetanga - E Aroha Ana a Phobe Ki a Koe
1. Kāore e taea e ia te tango i ōna kanohi i a koe
Me pēhea te mōhio mēnā kei te hiahia tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe? Reddit i tuhituhi te kaiwhakamahi, "Ki te kitea ia e titiro matatau mai ana ki a koe, me/ranei e rerekē ana āna mahi i tō aroaro, ki tā te aroaro o ētahi atu tāngata." Tērā pea ka kite koe i tētahi tohu o te kukume kanohi, ka kitea pea tēnei i a ia e titiro tonu ana ki a koe i tērā taha o te whare, i ngā hui rānei. Ko te kore e taea e ia te tango i ōna kanohi i a koe he tohu nui tēnei mō ōna kare ā-roto mōu.
2. Ka kitea e ia ngā huarahi hei tūtaki/hei mahi tahi māu
Me pēhea te mōhio mēnā he hiahia tō te tāne, he hoa noa iho rānei, Ina koa i roto i te ao ngaio? Ae, he uaua rawa tēnei ki te whakaoti. Engari ka kitea e koe he māramatanga mā te aro ki ēnei tohu huna e pai ana te tāne ki a koe:
- Ka kitea e ia ngā take hei mahi tahi me koe i ngā kaupapa kotahi
- Ka tūtaki tonu ia ki a koe, i te wharekai, i te wā rānei e tata ana koe ki ētahi atu hoa mahi
- Ka ngana ia ki te noho hei hoa mō ō hoa tari tata rawa atu
- He maha ana wā ka tū atu ia ki tō tēpu mō tētahi kōrero poto
3. Ngā tohu e pai ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe — Kei te hiahia tonu ia ki te āwhina i a koe
Me pēhea te mōhio mēnā kei te takaro tetahi hoa mahi ki a koe, kei te aroha rānei ki a koe? parapara toa ka whakaohokia i ngā wā katoa e tata ana ia ki a koe. Reddit E mea ana te kaiwhakamahi, "Ka hiahia ia ki te āwhina i a koe i ngā huarahi katoa e taea ana e ia." Nō reira, ki te mea kei te whakapau kaha ia ki te āwhina i a koe, koinei tētahi o ngā tohu pono e pai ana ia ki a koe, ā, e hiahia ana hoki kia hohonu ake te hononga. Ehara i te mea he karere kuputuhi/īmēra/he atawhai rima meneti noa iho tā mātou e kōrero nei. Engari ki te mea kei te noho pō ia ki a koe hei āwhina i a koe me tētahi kaupapa kāore e whai hua ki a ia, me mōhio koe ka whakaaro anō hoki ia ki a koe i a koe e hoki ana ki te kāinga.
4. Ka kite ia i ngā kōrero katoa mōu
Ko tētahi o ngā tohu e aro atu ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe, he tino pūkenga ia ki te kite i ngā mea pēnei i:
- I te wā i kakahuria ai e koe he kākahu e tino whakaatu ana i ō kanohi
- Ngā hu/poroporo e matenuitia ana e koe
- Ko te inu pūngao e pai ana koe ki te inu i ngā wā okiokinga
Whakaarohia, he nui rawa tōna aro ki te mahi tahi anake, tika? I kī tētahi o ā mātou kaipānui, kua moe wahine inaianei ki tana hoa mahi, i a tana tāne inaianei e ngana ana ki te wikitoria i a ia, i mahara ia ki ngā kōrero iti mōna, pērā i te mea he kawhe pango anake tāna e inu ana i te ata, ā, me rima pea ngā pene me te rama whakamārama i tana tēpu hei whakaoti i tana mahi. Ehara tēnei i te mea e hiahia ana te tangata noa i roto i tō ao ki te maumahara mōu.
5. He hiahia nui tōna ki a koe
Kei te whakaaro koe, "Kei te takaro mai taku hoa mahi ki ahau?" Āe, ki te ngana ia ki te mōhio pai ake ki a koe, ehara i te mea he takaro noa iho. Ka taea e koe te tino mohio kei te pai ia ki a koe mena he pono tana hiahia ki a koe hei tangata, ā, e hiahia ana ia ki te mōhio pai ake ki a koe mā te pātai atu ki a koe:
- Ngā pātai whaiaro e whakaoho ana i te urupare kare ā-roto
- Ngā pātai hōhonu mō tō tamarikitanga, ōu hiahia, ōu hākinakina me ōu mahere ā muri ake nei
- Ngā ingoa o ō hoa tata me ō mema o te whānau
Whakaarohia tētahi rā ka kī atu koe ki a ia he pai ki a koe ngā pukapuka, ā, i te rā i muri mai ka haere mai ia ki te mahi me tētahi pukapuka nā tō kaituhi tino pai i roto i tōna ringa, me te whakarite kia kite koe i te pukapuka i runga i tana tēpu. Ko tana whakapau kaha ki te hono atu ki a koe tētahi o ngā tohu mārama e aro atu ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe.
6. He pai ake tana manaaki i a koe/te atawhai i a koe i tētahi atu
Te āhua nei kua mōhio pai ia ki ētahi atu hoa mahi, engari kāore koe e kite i a ia e whakapau kaha ana ki te whakamanawareka i a rātou. Engari ina tae mai ki a koe, ka tino rerekē te āhua. Ka kawea mai e ia ki a koe te ngā koha whakangā pai rawa atu pērā i te kawhe/tiakarete/keke, ka mea, "I hikoi noa atu ahau i tō toa tunu kai tino pai, nō reira i whakaaro ahau me kawe mai he kai māu!" Ki te mea he atamai koe, kāti ka mōhio koe i tahuri kē ia ki te tiki i aua kai hei miharo i a koe.
7. Ka mihi ia ki a koe
He aha te ngā tohu e kore ai ia e ātete ki a koeKi te mea he maha tonu ngā mihi a tō hoa mahi ki a koe, tera pea koinei tētahi o ngā tohu e pai ana te hoa mahi ki a koe engari e huna ana. Kaua e whakakorea ēnei hei kōrero noa mai i te hoa mahi whakakatakata, ki te mea ka kī ia i ngā mea pēnei (he tohu ēnei kei te aroha ia ki a koe):
- "He tino ataahua tō āhua i tēnei rā, he tino ataahua te tae o tēnei ki a koe"
- "I kite ahau kei te rerekē tō āhua o tō makawe, he ataahua"
- "Kei te kakahu koe i tētahi hinu kakara hou? He kakara pai"
- "Ka pai te whakaaturanga inanahi. Kāore he tangata i pai ake i a koe"
8. E hiahia ana ia ki te noho tahi me koe i muri i te tari
He aha ngā tohu e pai ana ia ki a koe? Reddit i tuhituhi te kaiwhakamahi, "E ngana ana ki te akiaki i a koe ki te mahi i waho, e ngana ana ki te noho whakapā atu." Mena ka pātai atu tēnei tangata ki a koe mō ō mahere i muri i te mahi, ā, ka hohoro te tuku whakaaro mēnā he whānui tō pō, e mārama ana kei te hiahia ia ki te wā takitahi ki a koe.
Ka hiahia tonu ia ki te haere ki te kiriata, ki te hui kawhe, ki te kai tina rānei me koe anake, kaua ki tētahi rōpū tāngata mai i te mahi. Ki te whai wāhi kōrua ki te mahi i tētahi mea iti nei ngā karere kuputuhi aroha ā, ka kōrero waea atu koe i muri i ngā hāora mahi ka whakahuatia māramatia e ia te "kāore he kōrero hokohoko", kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakaaroaro ki ngā tohu e pai ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe.
9. He nui tana takaro
Ehara i te mea ko te takaro ki tētahi hoa mahi te whakamahi i ngā kupu whakahihiko i ia rā, i ia rā. Ko te "whakakatakata whakakatakata" tētahi o ngā tohu o te hiahia i waenga i ngā hoa mahi, e ai ki tētahi Reddit kaiwhakamahi. Tērā pea he kōrero whakakatakata ā-roto tā kōrua, ā, ingoa ingoa orotika tetahi ki tetahi. Anei ētahi atu tohu kaha hei tohu i tōna aroha ki a koe:
- Te whakatoi/te tunu/te whakapataritari i a koe
- Ngā katakata hei whakakata i a koe
- Te tuku mihi whakamihi kia harikoa ai koe
Te pānui e pā ana: Te whakaipoipo i tētahi hoa mahi? Anei te huarahi hei whakahaere i te aroha o te tari
10. Ngā tohu e pai ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe – Kei te tiaki ia i a koe
He manaakitanga, he kanga rānei te whai hoa mahi e mātakitaki ana i ō nekehanga katoa. He manaakitanga mēnā kei te tautoko tonu rātou i a koe. He kanga mēnā kei te mātakitaki rātou i ō nekehanga katoa e rapu ana i tētahi whai wāhitanga ki te whakangaro i ō tūmanakohanga ngaio. Ko tētahi o ngā tohu e aro atu ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe ko tana aro ki a koe ka rite ki tētahi manaakitanga nā te mea:
- Ka whakamana ia i tōu mana i mua i te aroaro o ētahi atu
- Māna koe e ārahi ina he kehe tō kōrero i te wā o te hui
- Ka whakatenatena ia i a koe kia kaha ake te mahi, engari ka noho tonu hoki ia hei tautoko i a koe ahakoa ka hinga koe
Te pānui e pā ana:12 Ngā Huarahi Ka Raru ai Koe i ngā Take Tari
11. Ka mataku ia mēnā ka kōrero koe mō te whakawhiti mahi
I mea mai taku hoa ki ahau, "Kei te takaro mai tētahi tangata i te mahi ki ahau. Ehara ia i te hoa noa iho nōku. He hoa mahi anō hoki nōku. Koia te mea e uaua ake ai. Ka kite ahau i a ia e titiro mai ana ki ahau i te mahi. Waihoki, i ngā wā katoa ka kōrero ahau mō te taiao paitini o te tari me te nui o taku hiahia ki te mutu, ka pā mai ngā mamae o te manukanuka wehenga "pā atu ki a ia." Nō reira, ki te kite koe i a ia e whakatenatena ana i a koe kia noho tonu ki tō mahi o nāianei, kaua hoki e huri, kei a koe te whakautu ki "Kei te pai taku hoa mahi ki ahau?"
12. E hiahia ana ia ki te mōhio mō te āhua o tō kōrua whanaungatanga
Te kōrero mō ngā hiahia aroha i te wāhi mahi, he Reddit I tuhituhi te kaiwhakamahi, "He haerenga koretake ki tō teihana mahi. He whakawhiti nohoanga i te rūma tina kia tata atu. Ka pātai mai mēnā he takakau koe. Ia rā." Nō reira, ki te kitea e ia he take hei kōrero mō tō oranga aroha/e hiahia ana ia ki te mōhio mēnā kei te hiahia koe ki tētahi atu i waho o te mahi, ko koe tonu tana tangata e arohaina ana.
13. Ka hae wawe ia
Me pēhea koe e mōhio ai mēnā ko koe tana e aroha nei ki te mahi? Ina kōrero koe mō ō e aroha nei ki a ia, ka mataku ia, ā, ka tinihanga ia. Ka hiahia te hoa mahi whai rawa ki te karo i tēnei kaupapa, ki te whakawātea rānei i a ia anō ina puta ake ēnei momo kaupapa. Nā te mea kāore ia e hiahia ki te whakaaro kei a koe tētahi atu. He hinengaro tāne noa iho tēnā. Mēnā ka riro i a ia te kaha manukanuka ina ngana tētahi atu tāne ki te noho tahi me koe, ina whakapā atu rānei ki a koe, he tohu pono tēnā kei te hiahia ia ki a koe.
Te pānui e pā ana: Ngā Take e Ono ai te Hae o ngā Tāne, Ahakoa Ehara rātou i tō Tāne/Hoa
14. Ka taea hoki e ō hoa mahi te rongo i tēnei
Ina hiahia te tangata ki tētahi hoa mahi, ka kitea e te katoa i te mutunga. Nō reira, mā te aro ki ā rātou tauhohe ka āwhina i a koe ki te kite i ngā tohu ngaro e pai ana ki tō hoa mahi tāne. Tirohia mēnā:
- Kua kite ō hoa kapa i a ia e whero ana
- Ka whakatoi te katoa i a ia ki a koe
- Kei te kōrero tonu te iwi mō te ngā tohu e hiahia ana ia ki te whakaae i ōna kare ā-roto mōu
15. Ka kite koe i ngā tohu reo tinana e pai ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe
Ahakoa kei te ngana ia ki te whakahaere i ōna kare ā-roto, me te noho mārire ki a koe, ka kitea ia e ngā tohu o te reo tinana e pai ana te hoa mahi tāne ki a koe – nā te mea ko te nuinga o ēnei he urupare me ngā urupare ā-tinana kore. Mena he aroha pono tōna ki a koe, tera pea ka kite koe i ēnei e whai ake nei:
- Ka 'pāpā' tōna ringa ki tōu
- Tērā pea ka pā kino atu tōna tinana ki tō tinana 'ā-pōrearea' (ahakoa he nui te wāhi hei whakawhiti mā kōrua tetahi ki tetahi)
- Ka pā atu ia ki tō pakihiwi/tō ringa o runga i a ia e kōrero ana ki a koe
- I a kōrua e mahi tahi ana, ka titiro mai ia ki a koe mai i te kokonga o ōna kanohi
- Ka piko atu ia ki a koe ina kōrero koe
Nā te mea ka taea e koe te kite i te ngā tohu e aroha ana te tangata ki a koe, kei a koe te whakatau me pēhea te whakatutuki i tēnei. Ka tohutohu mātou kia whakatau koe i tēnei me te whai whakaaro nui, kaua e whakawhirinaki ki ngā kare ā-roto anake. Ehara i te mea ko ngā whanaungatanga i roto i te wāhi mahi anake ka pā ki a koe i roto i te kare ā-roto, engari ka pā ki tō whanaungatanga ngaio me tō ahua i mua i te aroaro o ētahi atu. Mena he pono te whakatau, me whakaaro koe ki tāu mahi e whai ake nei.
Kei te hiahia koe ki te tono atu ki a ia kia haere tahi, kei te hiahia rānei koe ki te whakatenatena i a ia kia whaki i tana hara? Ahakoa pēhea, me kōrero koe ki a ia. Mā te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero whai hua ka taea e koe te penapena i tō wā me tō kaha. Ki te whakatau koe ki te whai hononga, me kōrero noa ki te tari rauemi tangata. He mea whakama te kitea e rātou i roto i ngā pāpāho pāpori!
FAQs
Ina aroha te tangata ki tētahi hoa mahi, ka kimi tonu ia i ngā take hei tīmata kōrero. Ehara i te mea koinā anake, engari ka atawhai pea ia i a koe ki ngā mihi i te roanga o te rā, ka kimi take hei toro atu ki tō tēpu, ā, hei āwhina i a koe, hei titiro kanohi rānei i a koe i ngā hui.
Ko ētahi o ngā tohu e pai ana tētahi hoa mahi tāne ki a koe koia tēnei. Tērā pea ka whakapau kaha ia ki te āwhina i a koe, ka ngana ki te kōrero mō ngā mea ehara i te mahi, ā, ka ngana anō hoki ki te mōhio atu ki tō oranga aroha. Ki te kite koe i a ia e rapu huarahi ana ki te noho "noa" ki a koe, he tika tāu kōrero mō te "he tangata kei te mahi e takaro ana ki ahau".
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Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
E whakaae ana ahau ki te wāhanga 4 me te 5!