Zibwenzi Zogonana: Tanthauzo, Zizindikiro, Ndi Malangizo Othetsa

Kufalitsa chikondi

Kodi munayamba mwamvapo kutopa kwambiri mutagonana ndi munthu wina? Kapena kodi kugonana ndi munthu wina kwatsegula zitseko za kugwirizana kwakukulu kwamalingaliro? Ngati yankho ndi inde, izi zitha kukhala zizindikilo kuti mukupanga ubale wapamtima pakugonana. Kuti tilowe mozama mu ubale wa kugonana komanso momwe mphamvu zauzimu zimasinthidwira panthawi yogonana, tinakambirana ndi mphunzitsi wa ubale komanso wokhulupirira nyenyezi. Nishi Ahlawat, yemwe ndi katswiri wowerengera manambala komanso kuwerenga kwa tarot.

Kodi Maubwenzi Ogonana Ndi Chiyani?

M'ndandanda wazopezekamo

Pofotokoza za kugwirizana kwa kugonana, Nishi anati, “Pali gulu lachipembedzo la Mars ndi Venus m’matchati a anthu aŵiri mmene tingadziwire kugwirizana kolimba kwa kugonana pakati pawo.” Koma zimatheka bwanji kuti anthu awiri agwirizane pambuyo pa kugonana? Simungadziwe izi koma mphamvu zimasinthidwa panthawi yogonana, osati pamlingo wakuthupi, komanso pamalingaliro, malingaliro, ndi uzimu. Izi zitha kuchitika ndi mnzako wapano, bwenzi lakale kapena bwenzi lakale, kapenanso wina yemwe muli naye kugonana wamba ndi.

Mwa kuyankhula kwina, kugonana ndi wina kungayambitse mgwirizano wozama wauzimu monga kugonana. Mutha kugwira / kulowetsa mkati mwazovulala za wokondedwa wanu, kusatetezeka, ndi mantha kudzera m'mabwenzi ogonanawa, osazindikira.

Psychotherapist Dr. Daniel Amen amatcha chodabwitsa ichi Limbic Bonding. Iye anati: “Anthu aŵiri angasankhe kugonana ‘pongofuna kungosangalala basi’ koma zinthu zikuchitika pamlingo wina umene mwina sakanaganizapo n’komwe: kugonana kumakulitsa unansi wamalingaliro pakati pawo kaya akufuna kukhala paubwenzi wapamtima kapena ayi.”

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Zizindikiro za Moyo Wogwirizana Pogonana

Kugonana kapenanso ma orgasms sikuti nthawi zonse amatsogolera kupanga zibwenzi zogonana. Koma mukamagonana ndi munthu wina, mwayi wopanga mgwirizano wa mzimu umawonjezeka kwambiri popeza thupi lanyama limapangidwa ndi mzimu wauzimu. Nthawi zambiri, izi zimakhala zosagwirizana ndi moyo. Nazi zina mwazizindikiro zosonyeza kuti mwapanga mzimu womangika pogonana ndi munthu yemwe mudakhala naye pachibwenzi:

1. Mumatengeka nazo

Kodi mumakhala ndi malingaliro opitilira muyeso / malingaliro amphamvu okhudza munthu ngakhale atakuuzani kuti alibenso chidwi ndi inu? Kodi mumamva kupweteka kwa mutu, kupweteka kwa m'mimba, kusagona usiku, ndi kusowa kwa njala pa akaunti yawo? Ichi chikhoza kukhala chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zomwe mwapanga ubale wa moyo.

Moyo womangirira ndi munthu ndi mgwirizano wozama womwe sungathe kufotokozedwa (monga ulusi wosaoneka / chingwe chophiphiritsira chomangirira anthu awiri pamodzi). Izi zikutanthauza kuti mumamvabe kuti muli omangika ndi mnzanu wogonana naye ndipo mumawalota nthawi zina, ngakhale simuli limodzi. Ziribe kanthu kuti yadutsa nthawi yochuluka bwanji, malingaliro anu pa munthu uyu ndi amphamvu kuposa momwe mumamvera kwa anthu ena m'moyo wanu.

Zizindikiro Kuti Muli ndi Maubwenzi a Moyo Pakugonana

Pakhoza kukhalanso zifukwa zina za maubwenzi ogonana kwambiri. Nishi akuti, "Zitha kukhala chikoka cha kumpoto kwa mwezi pa tchati cha munthuyo kapena nkhani zina zaubwenzi zomwe sizinathetsedwe." Kutengeka kosayenera Zitha kutsatiridwanso kuzinthu za umunthu, kuwonekera kwa ubwana ku maubwenzi osayenera, kapena nkhani zosathetsedwa ndi anthu ofunikira pa moyo wanu.

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2. Mwatenga makhalidwe awo oipa

As kafukufuku akuwonetsa kuti, timadzi ta oxytocin timatulutsidwa panthawi yogonana. Ichi ndichifukwa chake mutha kukhala ndi zibwenzi zogonana ndi okondedwa wanu. Kukhala wokondana kwambiri ndi munthu yemweyo mobwerezabwereza kumatha kupangitsa kuti pakhale mgwirizano wofanana ndi moyo. Mwinanso mungaone kuti mwalandirapo makhalidwe oipa a mnzanu wogonana naye. Chifukwa chake, nthawi zonse samalani momwe zimakhalira pambuyo pogonana. Kodi mwakhumudwa? Kapena okondwa / amphamvu?

3. Simungathe kuchoka

Kodi pali kusiyana kotani pakati pa maubwenzi auzimu, ogwirizana nawo, ndi moto wamapasa? Nishi anati: “Ulendo wa a Soulmates ndi wosavuta kuyerekeza ndi malawi awiri a moto, koma tikamagwiritsa ntchito mawu oti ‘tie’ pofotokoza za kugwirizana kwa mzimu, ndiye kuti sitili omasuka. mgwirizano wa karmic. "

Ndipo, chifukwa cha ubale wa karmic uwu, simungathe kusiya kulumikizana ndi moyo wanu, ngakhale mutadziwa kuti simukusangalala. Mtundu uwu waubwenzi wopanda thanzi umakupangitsani kukhala mopitilira muyeso, ngakhale mnzako akukulamulirani / kuwongolera, ndipo ndi chimodzi mwazizindikiro zazikulu za ubale wapamtima.

4. Mumawalakalaka

Mfundo yakuti mumawafuna (ngakhale zikutanthawuza kuvutika ndi ululu wa chikondi chosavomerezeka) chikhoza kukhala chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zomwe mwapanga ubale wapamtima pogonana. Mwinamwake, kugonana kwatha koma osati zongopeka zosatha zamaganizo za iwo. Kapena mwina mumamvabe a mgwirizano wauzimu kwa “iye amene wathawa.”

Nishi akuti, "Zinthu zambiri zimaseweredwa mukafuna kuvomerezedwa ndi wina - ulendo wa moyo wanu, mphamvu zanu zakugonana, komanso kukopeka kwambiri pakugonana ndi munthu winayo."

5. Mukuvutika kupanga maubwenzi abwino ndi ena

Ngati mukupeza kuti zikukuvutani kupanga maubwenzi abwino ndi ena mutagonana, ichi chikhoza kukhala chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zosonyeza kuti mwapanga chiyanjano. Mwatanganidwa kwambiri ndi mnzako wapamtima (chifukwa cha kugwirizana) kotero kuti simungathe kuchoka pa iwo.

RC Blakes, Jr. akulemba m'buku lake, Soul-Ties: Kuphwanya Zomangira Zomwe Zimamanga, “Zina mwa zotsatira za kugwirizana kwa moyo ndi: kudziyang'anira pansi, kulephera kuyanjana wina ndi mnzake, ndi malingaliro olakwika ponena za chimene chikondi chili.”

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6. Mumasinthasintha kwambiri m'maganizo

Ngati mukupeza kuti mukukumana ndi kukhumudwa kwambiri komanso kutsika kokhudzana ndi bwenzi lanu logonana nalo, chikhoza kukhala chimodzi mwazizindikiro zazikulu za ubale wapamtima. Kusinthasintha kwakukulu kumeneku kungasonyeze kusangalala pamene zinthu zikuyenda bwino kapena kutaya mtima kwakukulu pamene tiyang’anizana ndi zovuta kapena kupatukana. Kusokonezeka maganizo kumeneku pamene miyoyo iwiri ikugwirizana ikhoza kusonyeza a kulumikizidwa mwamphamvu komanso kosayenera zomwe zimapitirira mbali yakuthupi ya ubale.

7. Mumagawana kulumikizana kwamatsenga

Kulumikizana kwama psychic kumaphatikizapo kumva momwe akumvera, malingaliro, kapenanso kukhudzika kwa mnzako wogonana naye, ngakhale mutakhala kutali. Ngati nthawi zonse mumamva malingaliro a mnzanu kapena malingaliro ake popanda kulankhulana mwachindunji, zitha kutanthauza kulumikizana kwakuya kapena kukhudzika mtima. ubwenzi wauzimu. Kulumikizana komwe kumawoneka ngati kusintha moyo kungapangitse kukhala kovuta kukhazikitsa malire ndikusunga malingaliro aumwini mkati mwa ubalewo.

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8. Mumamva kutopa kapena kutopa mutakhala nawo limodzi

Ngati mumadzimva kukhala otopa nthawi zonse, m'maganizo, kapena m'thupi mutagonana ndi wokondedwa wanu, ichi chikhoza kukhala chizindikiro cha kugonana. Kutopa kumeneku kungakhale chifukwa cha kusinthanitsa kwamphamvu komwe kumachitika panthawi yapamtima pamene miyoyo iwiri ikugwirizana. Ndikofunika kusamala momwe mumamvera mutakhala ndi mnzanu kuti muwone ngati kugwirizanako kukulimbikitsani kapena kukuyambitsani chisokonezo.

9. Mumabwerera m'mbuyo ngakhale zotsatira zoipa

Kubwerera mosalekeza kwa ogonana nawo, ngakhale mutadziwa kuti ubalewu ndi woopsa kapena wovulaza ku thanzi lanu, ndi chizindikiro chodziwika bwino cha kugonana. Ngakhale kuti mukumvetsa zotsatirapo zake zoipa, mungakopeke mobwerezabwereza kuti mubwerere kwa munthuyo. Khalidweli likuwonetsa kulumikizana kozama kwamalingaliro ndi uzimu komwe kumapitilira kupanga zisankho zomveka, kuwonetsa kukhalapo kwa moyo wolimba.

Lingaliro la mzimu wa kugonana limachokera ku Chikristu. Baibulo limamasulira kuti kugonana kumabweretsa mgwirizano wamphamvu choncho ndi ntchito ya anthu okwatirana okha. Baibulo limanena za malonjezo a Mulungu, mgwirizano wa miyoyo yosaopa Mulungu, ndi “miyoyo iwiri, thupi limodzi”.

Komabe, kudzikana ufulu wofufuza za kugonana kwanu ndi kukwaniritsa zofuna zanu zogonana mpaka mutalowa m'banja ndi lingaliro lachikale m'dziko lamakono. Kuyesa ndi anthu angapo ndi chisankho chaumwini komanso chovomerezeka. Zomwe mungachite ndikuphwanya maubwenzi opanda thanzi kuti musunge mphamvu zanu ndikuchepetsa kuchuluka kwa zinyalala zamalingaliro / zauzimu / zamalingaliro zomwe mwakhala mukuzisonkhanitsa panjira. Izi zidzakuthandizani kupita patsogolo ndikupanga mtendere ndi zomwe munakumana nazo m'mbuyomu.

Momwe Mungathetsere Maubwenzi a Moyo Pogonana

Kufotokozera momwe mungachotsere a moyo tie, Nishi akugogomezera, "Kukhululukidwa ndi sitepe yoyamba mu kuswa maubwenzi a moyo. Kudula zingwe zamaganizo ndikotsatira. Choncho, yambani ndi kukhululukira munthu amene wakulakwirani, wakusocheretsani, kapena amene anakudyerani masuku pamutu. Umu ndi momwe mungayendetsere kuswa tie ya mzimu:

1. Kusinkhasinkha/kupemphera kuti mukhululukire

Monga sitepe yoyamba yothetsa zibwenzi, yesetsani kutsatira njira zotsatirazi tsiku lililonse kuti muthyole zomangira zopanda thanzi ndikuyika patsogolo kukhudzika kwanu:

Khalani chete ndi nsana wanu molunjika
Yang'anani pa mpweya wanu ndikuyitanitsa angelo / otsogolera auzimu kuti akuthandizeni
Tangoganizani kudula chingwe / chingwe chakumanga chomwe chimakumangani inu ndi moyo wanu
Onani m'maganizo kuwala koyera kwa chifundo ndi kukhululuka
Pumirani pang'ono ndikutsegula maso anu
Nenani pemphero lomwe mumakonda kapena mungothokoza

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2. Momwe mungathetsere ubale wapamtima - Dulani

Kodi mungaswe bwanji moyo wauzimu ndi munthu wakale? Khazikitsani malire. Simukuyenera kumawawona, kuwatumizira mameseji, kapena kuwaimbira foni. Simuyenera kumawatsata pazama TV. Mutha kuyesanso kupewa kukumana ndi anzanu kapena achibale awo kwakanthawi. Khalani pagulu la anzanu omwe mumawakhulupirira.

Komanso, taya mphatso zawo zonse kapena zinthu zomwe zimakukumbutsani. Ndikudziwa kuti ndi sitepe yoopsa koma ikhoza kukhala yovuta kuwotcha zinthuzo. Kapena mukhoza kungopereka iwo. Koma kwenikweni, siyani kuvala wotchi yomwe wakale wanu adakupatsani mphatso kapena kugona mu t-sheti yawo.

Lingaliro ndikuyamba kumasuka ku mphamvu zawo zoyipa kuti muchiritse malingaliro anu. Masulani malingaliro anu, chifuniro, ndi malingaliro anu ku chisonkhezero chawo. Ngati mukumva kuti mukukakamizika kukambirana komaliza ndi munthuyu, chitani kuti adziwe kuti kulumikizana kosayenera kumeneku kuyenera kutha kuti musagwere mumsampha womwewo ndikusokoneza moyo wanu.

3. Lembani maganizo anu muzolemba

Nthawi zonse mukakhala mdima, wotengeka mtima, komanso wapoizoni, zilembeni zonse m'magazini - Pali umboni wasayansi wofalitsa nkhani ndi wabwino kwambiri pakudzisamalira komanso kukula kwanu. Mudzamva kuti simukukakamizika kwambiri mukatulutsa malingaliro anu onse papepala. Mutha kuyilembanso ngati kalata kwa wakale wanu, yomwe simuyenera kutumiza.

Okhulupirira m'miyoyo yakale amanena kuti kugwirizana kwa moyo kumakhala ndi phunziro lobisika. Kotero, mwinamwake, izi mgwirizano wa moyo ukhoza kukhala mwayi wophunzira, kukuphunzitsani momwe mungagonjetsere chilengedwe ndikusiya maubwenzi osayenera a kugonana. Mukamawerenga zambiri, mumatha kumvetsetsa mozama zomwe izi zikuyesera kukuphunzitsani, ndikukuthandizani kuti muphwanye moyo wanu.

4. Limbikitsani kudzidalira kwanu

Nishi anati: “Mawu oti poizoni nthaŵi zambiri amagwiritsidwa ntchito ponena za kugwirizana kosayenera kwa moyo. Ubwenzi ukatha, ukhoza kukuchotsera ulemu wako ndipo ungakupangitse kudzida moyo wako wonse.

Kuti mukhulupirirenso mwa inu nokha, chepetsani kudzilankhula koipa. Nenani mawu olimbikitsa kwa inu nokha mu mawonekedwe a zitsimikizo zabwino. Phunzirani kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi nthawi zonse kuti mumve bwino ndikuphwanya moyo wanu. Zitha kukhala kuvina, kupita ku masewera olimbitsa thupi, kapena kusewera badminton.

5. Momwe mungachotsere tayi ya moyo - Pezani thandizo la akatswiri

Mukudabwabe momwe mungathetsere ubale wapamtima pakugonana? Kuyesera kudziwa momwe mungachotsere ubale wopanda thanzi sikophweka, makamaka ngati mukuchita nokha. Psychotherapist Sampreeti Das akuti, “Kuchiza kungathandize kupeza mavuto ambiri amene angakhalepo pothetsa chibwenzi.

"Kupyolera mu chithandizo, mudzapeza malingaliro atsopano, kupeza zinthu zomwe sizinathetsedwe, kudziwa zomwe zikuyambitsa ndi momwe mungazilamulire, komanso kuphunzira kudzisamalira nokha ndi kukula kwanu."

Ngati mukulimbana ndi zomangira zauzimu zomwe simungathe kuzigwedeza nokha, Bonobology's. maganizo zaumoyo angakuthandizeni pa nthawi yovutayi.

Zolozera Mfungulo

Mutha kukhala ndi ubale wauzimu ndi wokondedwa wanu popanda kuzindikira
Zomangira zambiri za mzimu zimamveka ngati kulumikizana kokhazikika pamlingo wakuthupi, wamalingaliro, komanso wauzimu
Maubwenzi amphamvu ngati awa amabwera m'moyo wanu kuti akupatseni chidwi chophunzira
Ubale wauzimu umakusiyani ndi chinyengo chakuti munthuyu amakumalizani
Maubwenzi apamtima oterowo amamveka ngati odziwika koma pamafunika kuwadula kuti musunge malingaliro anu
Mutha kugwiritsa ntchito njira monga kulemba, kupemphera kwa angelo / owongolera auzimu, komanso kusinkhasinkha kodula zingwe kuti mumasuke ku nyonga yogonana.

Pomaliza, mukamakulitsa mgwirizano pakugonana, mvetsetsani ndikuwunika ngati ndi ubale wabwino kapena wapoizoni. Ngati ndi tayi yamoyo wathanzi, pitirirani ndikuwona mokwanira. Koma ngati ndi moyo wopanda thanzi kapena poizoni, yesetsani kudzipatula kapena kuchotsani chifukwa cha moyo wanu.

Inde, tikudziwa kuti zomwe mudagawana komanso kulumikizana komwe mudamvapo m'zibwenzi zanu zam'mbuyomu ndizosamvetsetseka/zosasinthika. Koma pogwira munthu ameneyo kwamuyaya, mukudzitsekereza nokha ndikutsekereza madalitso anu. Tikukhulupirira kuti tsopano mukumvetsetsa bwino momwe mungachotsere mgwirizano wa mzimu, ndikuti zikuthandizani kuti mupange ubale watsopano m'moyo wanu.

Ibibazo

1. Kodi maubwenzi ogonana amakhudza amuna?

Inde, amuna amakhudzidwa mofanana ndi akazi pamene apanga ubale wapamtima. Koma amuna amakhala ochenjera kwambiri pochita zinthu ndi mzimu.

2. Kodi maubwenzi ogonana atha kukhala mbali imodzi?

Inde, chikondi chosayenerera chimafanana ndi kugwirizana kwa moyo umodzi. Mwinamwake, kugonana kwatha koma osati zongopeka zosatha zamaganizo za iwo. Kapena mwina mukumvabe kulumikizana kwauzimu ndi "iye amene wathawa".

3. Kodi chomangira mzimu wapoizoni ndi chiyani?

Moyo wapoizoni ndi womwe ungakupwetekeni m'maganizo, mwauzimu, kapena mwakuthupi. Popeza ndi chiwonetsero champhamvu cha kutengeka komwe mumamva kwa munthu, moyo wapoizoni ukhoza kusokoneza mbali zina za moyo wanu.

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Zopereka zanu sizikupanga zachifundo Mphatso. Zilola kuti Bonobology ipitilize kukubweretserani zidziwitso zatsopano komanso zaposachedwa pakufuna kwathu kuthandiza aliyense padziko lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.