Moyo ndi waufupi, ndipo tonse tili pa mpikisano woti tipindule nawo. Kupatula apo, umakhala moyo kamodzi kokha. Chifukwa cha kukwera kwa malo ochezera a pa Intaneti komanso kuchuluka kwa mapulogalamu a zibwenzi, anthu ambiri akukulitsa zibwenzi zawo. Anthu ambiri masiku ano ali pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo nthawi imodzi.
Mumapita pa tsiku ndi munthu pamene muli ndi chidwi ndi iwo ndipo mukufuna kuti muwadziwe bwino. Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi nthawi yoyeserera pomwe mumazindikira ngati nonse ndinu oyenerera kuti mupite ku gawo lina.
Ngakhale kuyankhulana ndi anthu opitilira m'modzi pazibwenzi zapaintaneti ndikofala kwambiri, zinthu zimatha kusokonekera mukamacheza ndi anthu angapo nthawi imodzi. Nawa malamulo ena omwe angakuthandizeni kuthana ndi vuto la zibwenzi zapabanja, komanso momwe mungayendere pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo nthawi imodzi.
Malamulo 8 Ochita Chibwenzi ndi Munthu Woposa Mmodzi
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi anthu opitilira m'modzi kumatchedwa "chibwenzi chongochitika mwachisawawa", ndipo ngati mutachita bwino, kungakhale kosangalatsa kwambiri. Kupatula apo, mukuyesa madzi ndipo zili bwino. Komabe kwinakwake m'mphepete mwa msewu, mizere ina imatha kusokonezedwa ndipo izi zimayambitsa kupwetekedwa mtima kosafunikira.
Mark, wazaka 25 zakubadwa woimira zamalonda anatiuza kuti: “Ndinkayesa kupeza munthu woti ndikhale naye pachibwenzi, koma sindinathe kusankha pakati pa akazi amene ndinkacheza nawo. Anawonjezera kuti: “Sindinkadziwa kuti ndiuze aliyense wa iwo zimene zinkachitikazo, choncho sindinatero.
Zinthu zinafika poipa kwambiri kwa onse aŵiriwo, ndipo ndisanasinthe maganizo, iwo anadziŵana za wina ndi mnzake.
Monga Mark, n'zotheka kuti mungakhale ndi mafunso monga, “Kodi n'kulakwa kuchita chibwenzi ndi anthu oposa m'modzi?” kapena osadziwa momwe mungayambire chibwenzi ndi akazi ambiri nthawi imodzi. Zinthu zisanawonongeke monga momwe zinamuyendera iye, ndibwino kuti aliyense amene akukhudzidwa atsatire malamulo enaake okhudza chibwenzi.
Mukakhala pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo mwachisawawa, muyenera kudziwa kuti ndi chinthu chachilendo kukopeka ndi anthu angapo nthawi imodzi. Komabe, zomwe mumachita nazo zimapangitsa kusiyana konse. Tiyeni tiwone malamulo ochezera anthu angapo nthawi imodzi.
Kuwerenga Kofanana: Zizindikiro 20 Zomwe Amafuna Kuposa Ubwenzi Wanu Osati Ubale Wamba
1. Kuona mtima n’kofunika mukakhala pachibwenzi ndi mkazi kapena mwamuna wina
Kuona mtima ndizomwe zimamanga ubale uliwonse, ndipo izi zimaphatikizaponso zibwenzi zachibwana. Ngati mukufuna kukhala pachibwenzi ndi akazi angapo nthawi imodzi, ndi bwino kudziwitsa onse okhudzidwa. Maphwando onse akuyenera kudziwa zomwe akulowa. Si bwino kupatsa munthu chinyengo chofuna kudzipezera yekha.
Komabe, kunena zoona sikutanthauza kuti mupereke tsatanetsatane wonse wa madeti anu ndi anthu ena kwa mkazi amene ali patsogolo panu. Zomwe zimachitika pa deti lanu zimakhala pakati pa inu ndi deti lanu. Mukufuna kuwasangalatsa mokwanira kuti afune kupita ku madeti ambiri ndipo zambiri zambiri zingawononge mwayi wanu wochita zimenezo.
2. Nthawi zonse muzilemekeza maganizo ndi zosankha za ena
Sikuti aliyense ali womasuka ndi lingaliro la kukhala pachibwenzi ndi kugona ndi anthu oposa mmodzi pa nthawi. Gawo lalikulu la anthu athu limakonda kukhala ndi mwamuna mmodzi. Lingaliro la “ameneyo” limachokera ku dziko loterolo. Choncho, n'zosadabwitsa kuti anthu ambiri amapewa polyamory kapena ngakhale chibwenzi wamba.
Ngakhale mutakhala bwino ndi akazi ambiri nthawi imodzi, munthu amene mukufuna kukhala naye pachibwenzi angamve mosiyana. Mwina amakhulupirira kuti anthu awiri ndi okondana kwambiri . Mwina savomereza kugonana asanakwatirane ndipo akudzisungira ndalama zawo akadzakwatirana. N'zotheka kuti sakusamala ngati mugonana pa tsiku loyamba. Kaya maganizo athu ndi otani, tiyenera kulemekeza maganizo ndi zisankho za anthu. Kuvomereza n'kofunika kwambiri!
3. Dziwani chifukwa chomwe mumakhalira pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo
Pali zifukwa zambiri zomwe munthu angasankhe kukhala pachibwenzi mwachisawawa. Kutha koyipa, ubale woyipa, mukufuna kuyang'ana kwambiri ntchito yanu kapena mwina ndinu polyamorous ndi zina mwazifukwa zomwe mungafune kukhala ndi dziwe lalikulu lazibwenzi. Ndipo ziri bwino kwathunthu.
Komabe, muyenera kudziwa ngati mukufuna kuchita izi kwa nthawi yayitali kapena ngati ichi ndichinthu chomwe mukufuna kuchita kwakanthawi. Chikhalidwe chofunikira kwambiri pazibwenzi zingapo wamba ndi kuwonekera. Kudziwitsa masiku anu komwe muli pachibwenzi kudzapulumutsa aliyense mavuto ambiri.
Choncho, si kulakwa kukhala pa angapo zibwenzi malo kapena ngakhale kulankhula ndi anthu oposa mmodzi pa Intaneti chibwenzi bola inu moona mtima.
4. Osaupanga kukhala mpikisano
Kudzipereka kochepa kumabweretsa udindo wochepa. Imeneyo ndiye gawo labwino kwambiri la chibwenzi chosavuta. Mumakumana ndi anthu atsopano. Mumatuluka ndikusangalala popanda mavuto . Chibwenzi chosavuta chiyenera kukhala chosangalatsa chifukwa chosakhala ndi zovuta. Komabe, anthu ena amasandutsa chibwenzi chosavuta kukhala buku lawo la The Bachelor.
Amakanganitsa madeti awo ndikuchita bwino munsanje yawo. Anthu otere amagwiritsa ntchito chisamaliro kuti adzimve bwino. Izi zimakhala choncho makamaka ngati muli paubwenzi wambiri. Ngati simungathe kuchita naye pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo kapena ngati mukufuna kuti adziwe nthawi yoti asiye chibwenzi ndi anyamata angapo chifukwa kufananiza kukufika kwa inu, ndikofunikira kuti adziwe.
Mukakhala pamasamba angapo ochezera, mutha kudzipeza kuti ndinu olakwa pakhalidweli, chifukwa mwina mukufanizira machesi anu ndi mnzake. Yesetsani kuti musamadzikhumudwitse pa izi, koma onetsetsani kuti simukungofuna kulimbikitsa kudzikonda kwanu.
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5. Lankhulani zosokoneza mukakhala pachibwenzi ndikugona ndi anthu angapo
William ndi Scarlet ankakonda kucheza. Anali ndi zokonda zambiri ndipo zomwe amaika patsogolo zinali zofanananso. William adakopeka ndi Scarlet ndipo adafuna kuti amufunse. Anafunsa ngati angalole kuwapatsa mpata. Anapempha kuti azipita kwa masiku angapo kuti awone ngati akugwirizana. Ngati zinthu sizinayende bwino, akanatha kumasiyana n’kukhala mabwenzi apamtima.
Scarlet ankakayikira. Anali atangotuluka kumene muubwenzi wazaka zitatu chifukwa chibwenzi chake chinali chitanyengana ndi mmodzi mwa anzake apamtima. Zimene zinamuchitikirazi zinali zochititsa manyazi kwa iye ndipo zinamutengera nthawi yaitali kuti atuluke m’maganizo mwake. Ngakhale William sanali ngati wakale wake wakale, anali wochenjera. Kotero, iye anaika pansi zikhalidwe zake.
Scarlet anauza William za nkhawa zake. Iye anati, “Will, ndimakukonda, ndipo ndikufuna kutuluka nawe. Ndikugwirizananso kuti tizionana ndi anthu ena. Komabe, pali chinthu chimodzi. Simungathe kuchita chibwenzi ndi anzanga kapena abale anga. Zimenezo ndi zosokoneza kwa ine. Ngati mwakopeka ndi anzanga, ndiuzeni kuti tithetse zinthu pakati pathu. Sindidzakhumudwa.”
Will anagwirizana nazo ndipo anayamba chibwenzi. Will ndi Scarlet akhala akuyenda mokhazikika kwa miyezi isanu ndi umodzi. Ndiodzipatula ndipo Will akukonzekera kufunsa Scarlet kuti azikhala naye.
6. Khalani ndi lamulo la masiku a "N".
Litha kukhala tsiku la 5 kapena tsiku la 8 koma sungani nambala yokhazikika. Ngati mwakhala pa tsiku ndi munthu yemweyo “N” kangapo, ndiye nthawi yoti mukambirane. Mwina mumamukondadi munthuyo, ndiye mutha kulankhula za kudzipatula. Mwina inu simukumva chilichonse umagwirira koma ndi munthuyo, ndiye ndi nthawi kusuntha kwa anthu ena.
Lingaliro la lamuloli ndilakuti mufunsane ndi chibwenzi chanu za komwe zinthu zikupita. Kukhala nthawi yayitali ndi munthu m'modzi kungayambitse malingaliro. Chifukwa chake, ndikofunikira kukambirana ndi chibwenzi chanu. Sikofunikira kwenikweni kutenga gawo lotsatira. Ngati muli ndi mavuto okhudzana ndi kudzipereka , nenani zimenezo. Koma lankhulani.
Ngati lamuloli silitsatiridwa, mutha kuyambitsa zowawa zambiri kwa aliyense wokhudzidwa. Simudziwa nthawi yoti musiye chibwenzi ndi anyamata kapena atsikana angapo, ndipo mukapewa kukambirana izi, ndizovuta kwambiri.
Ngati muli ndi mwayi wolandira, mudzangodalira kuyesa kuona zizindikiro kuti ali pachibwenzi ndi anyamata kapena atsikana angapo kuti adziwe zomwe mukukumana nazo. Ngati muwona zizindikiro ngati kusakhudzidwa komwe kukukulirakulira kapena nkhani zapa TV zomwe zimawapangitsa kukhala pachibwenzi ndi anthu ena, muyenera kuonetsetsa kuti mukudziyika nokha patsogolo.
7. Zindikirani ndi kufuula mukakhala mozama kwambiri
Kusintha ndiko kokhazikika m'miyoyo yathu. Mwina mwayamba chibwenzi poganiza kuti musunga zinthu zosavuta komanso zosavuta. Ndipo musanadziwe ndinu mutu pamwamba pa chikondi. Pamene Robert anazindikira modabwitsa.
Robert ndi Ivy anakumana m’gulu la zisudzo.
Anapikisana moyang'anizana ndipo pamene ma rehearsal anali kupita patsogolo, kukondana kwawo kunakulanso. Sewero litatha, Robert anamupempha kuti apite naye ku chibwenzi. Ivy sanafune. Anali wokonda kwambiri ntchito yake ndipo sankafuna kuyika tsogolo lake pachiswe. Robert anawauza kuti angopita ku chibwenzi chosavuta kuti akaone komwe zinthu zikuyendera. Palibe choletsa chifukwa nayenso anali atachoka pa chibwenzi choopsa ndipo anali pachibwenzi ndi akazi oposa m'modzi. Choncho, Ivy anavomera kutuluka naye.
Mwezi umodzi tili pachibwenzi ndipo Robert adazindikira kuti adagwa ndi mbedza ya Ivy, mzere, ndi sinker. Popeza iyeyo ndi amene anamuuza kuti ayambe chibwenzi ndi Ivy, anali ndi mantha pouza Ivy mmene ankamvera. Anayesetsa kuchita zinthu mofatsa komanso mopanda chidwi ndipo ankakhala nthawi yambiri ndi anthu ena koma sizinaphule kanthu. Robert analephera kumuchotsa m’maganizo mwake. Iye anachita kumuuza iye.
Pakadali pano, Ivy anali kukwiya kwambiri ndi Robert. Zonse zinali kuyenda bwino ndipo anayamba kuganiza kuti akhoza kuyang'ana kwambiri ntchito yake komanso Robert. Kukhala naye kunkaoneka kosavuta. Kenako mwadzidzidzi, Robert anayamba kuchita zinthu zachilendo. Sanali kukumana kwambiri ndipo ngakhale mauthenga anali atachepa. Ivy anamva kuti nthawi yakwana yoti achoke pachibwenzicho ndikupita patsogolo.
Robert anaganiza zomuimbira foni kuti tidzakumane titamwa khofi. Robert adamuuza zonse za momwe zizindikiro zomwe ali pachibwenzi ndi anyamata angapo zidamufikira. Anadabwa kwambiri atamva kuti maganizowo abwereranso. Anathokozanso nyenyezi zake zomwe adalankhula, apo ayi akanataya Ivy.
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8. Osapsompsona ndi kunena: Makhalidwe #1 pazibwenzi zingapo wamba
“Mambo No.5” yali lwimbo lwacindama, lwacikozyanyo lwesu toonse twakatamba, pele sena mwalimvwa bwiinguzi bwamajwi aayo? Poyamba nyimboyi inali munthu wolankhula, m'malo modzitamandira, za ntchito zake. Komabe, m’moyo weniweni, palibe amene amakonda munthu wodzitama. Sitikufunsani kuti mubise kuti muli pachibwenzi ndi akazi opitilira m'modzi, ndiye kuti muyenera kumasuka za izi, koma chonde musawadziwitse.
Ngakhale mungakhale omasuka ndi opanda zinsinsi, tsiku lanu angamve mosiyana. Kambiranani za izi koyambirira. Kambiranani zomwe mumamasuka nazo komanso zomwe simukumasuka nazo. Ndiyeno pitirirani nazo. Ngati mukusokonezekabe, ingokumbukirani izi - simuyenera kufotokoza zambiri za mafunso a 'WH-H' monga "Ndani, Liti, Kuti, Kapena Motani."
Kodi Kukhala ndi Chibwenzi ndi Anthu Ambiri Kumakhala Bwino?
Chibwenzi chosakhazikika ndi nthawi yomwe musanakhale chibwenzi kapena chibwenzi. Chimakupatsani mwayi wodziwa bwino munthu musanayambe chibwenzi chodzipereka. Ngati simukudziwa bwino za ubale wanu , chimakupatsani mwayi womvetsetsa zomwe mukufuna kuchokera kwa mnzanu komanso moyo wanu. Chimakhudza kudzidziwa nokha komanso kupeza mnzanu. Nazi zina zomwe mungachite kuti muyambe chibwenzi.
- Mumakopeka ndi anthu angapo nthawi imodzi
- Mutha kudziwa ngati wina ali woyenera kwa inu pakapita nthawi
- Simuli m'malo m'moyo wanu, m'malingaliro kapena mwanzeru pantchito, momwe mungadziperekere kwa munthu m'modzi yekha.
- Mukuwopa kudzipereka
- Mukufuna kukhala mu ubale wotseguka
Komabe zibwenzi zachiwembu sizingakhale kapu ya tiyi ya aliyense. Sikuti mumawapeza akufunsa mosalekeza kuti, “Kodi kukhala ndi chibwenzi ndi anthu oposa mmodzi kumabera?” Ayi. Mawaya awo amkati amakhala oti sangathe kuyang'ana kwambiri munthu m'modzi nthawi imodzi.
Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo kungatheke pokhapokha mutagawana. Ngati simuli yemwe inu muli, ndiye kuti zibwenzi wamba si zanu.
Venessa akufotokoza momwe adaganizira kuti akakhala bwino ndi Jadon ndi chibwenzi chake ndi anthu angapo nthawi imodzi, koma zidakhala zosiyana. "Ndinkaganiza kuti ndikhoza kuchita naye chibwenzi ndi anthu angapo pamene adandiuza kuti ndi zomwe akufuna kuchita." Sindinkaganiza kuti ndimugwere mwamsanga chonchi. Ndikamamukonda kwambiri, m'pamenenso zimandidetsa nkhawa kwambiri kuti anali pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo nthawi imodzi.
“M’kupita kwa nthaŵi ndinayenera kumuuza kuti zimenezi sizikundiyendera. Ndiye kodi n’kulakwa kukhala pachibwenzi ndi anthu ambiri? Malingana ngati pali chilolezo cha aliyense wokhudzidwa, ndipo malinga ngati munthu mmodzi sayamba kudzitamandira chifukwa cha kugonana kwawo, ziyenera kukhala zabwino.
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Kodi Muyenera Kusiya Liti Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi Anthu Ambiri?
Nthawi zambiri, zimachitika kuti maubwenzi angapo asokonekera kapena kusokonekera koyipa kungakupangitseni kumva kuti ndibwino kuti mukhale ndi chibwenzi momasuka. Ndipo simunalakwe kunena kuti kuchita chibwenzi mwachisawawa kumathandiza pazochitika zoterozo. Komabe, ngati muchita zomwe zalembedwa pansipa, ndiye kuti kucheza ndi anthu angapo sikungakhale kwa inu:
- Mumakonda kutero kugwa mchikondi msanga
- Mukuyang'ana zolemba ndi tsogolo
- Mumakonda kukhala ndi zibwenzi zamphamvu
- Mumachita nsanje mwachangu
- Mukuchita chifukwa mnzanuyo akuchita
- Mukungodzifunsa kuti ndi pachibwenzi kuposa munthu mmodzi kubera?
Ngati mukuvomera chilichonse mwazomwe zili pamwambazi, muyenera kukhala oona mtima kwa inu nokha osati kupitiriza ndi chibwenzi wamba.
Kunena zowona, pali kusalidwa pang'ono komwe kumalumikizidwa ndi chibwenzi chongopeka ndipo chifukwa chake ndi chakuti anthu amasokoneza zibwenzi zaposachedwa ndi polyamory. Kukhala pachibwenzi ndi anthu oposa mmodzi kumatchedwanso polyamory, komabe pali kusiyana kumodzi kwakukulu pakati pawo. Ngakhale kuti polyamory imatanthawuza kukhala pachibwenzi komanso kuchita chiwerewere ndi anthu angapo, chibwenzi chongopeka chimangofuna kudziwa ngati munthu amene mumakopeka naye ndi wanu.
Kukhala pachibwenzi, wamba kapena ayi, musamve ngati mukuyenera kunyamula dziko pamapewa anu. Zimafunikiradi ntchito, koma sizomwe ziyenera kukhalira. Iyenera kukhala yosangalatsa ndikukupangitsani kukhala osangalala. Ngati mutha kuwongolera zovuta za kukhala pachibwenzi ndi anthu angapo, ndiye zabwino komanso zabwino. Koma ngati mukuyenera kudzikumbutsa nokha kuti izi ndi zabwino, ndiye mverani kumverera kwa m'matumbo ndipo musapitirire nazo.
Nkhani Yaubale Wa Polyamorous: Zokambirana Ndi A Polyamorist
Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
