Iingcebiso ezili-12 zokuhlangabezana xa uthandana nomntu osebenza nzima

“Sthandwa sam ndibambeke emsebenzini.

Zingaphi izihlandlo apho umfana wakho ezirhoxisa izicwangciso kuba “esabambekile emsebenzini”? Uzilungiselele kwaye ulindele ngolangazelelo ukuba akulande, ukuba uphume ngobo busuku bomhla onokuthi wenze kube kanye ngeveki. Kodwa endaweni yoko, uthatha umnxeba wakhe wokucela uxolo ekuxelela indlela azisola ngayo ngokubanjwa emsebenzini, kwaye akunakwenzeka njani ukuba ayenze.

Ukuba nobudlelwane nendoda etshate nomsebenzi wayo kukukhwela isithukuthezi. Awusabuva ubushushu bobukho beqabane lakho kwaye naxa likhona uzenzela kude aqhubeke ecinga ngomsebenzi wakhe. Iphantse ibe ngathi ukubudlelwane obukude xa ingekho kwaphela.

Kwiimeko ezinjalo, uphantse unqwenele ukuba kukho enye intombazana emfanekisweni. Ubuncinane ngaloo ndlela, bekuya kufuneka ukhuphisane nomntu wokwenene!

Ngaba Dating A Workaholic?

Ewe, akunzima kuwe ukuba uchole iimpawu kumntu ongakuhoyanga ngenxa yomsebenzi wakhe kwaye uvume, "Isoka lam likhoboka lomsebenzi". Ukuthandana nomntu osebenza nzima yinto eqhele ukunqandwa ngamantombazana nangazo zonke iindleko kuba bayathanda amaqabane abo ukuba bawatotose kwaye bawahoye. Ndiyathetha, nantso ingongoma yobudlelwane akunjalo? Ukwabelana ngothando, ukuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni, nokukhangela iindlela zokuba kunye?

Ewe nangona oko kunokuvakala njengemeko efanelekileyo, uthando lusebenza ngeendlela ezingaqondakaliyo kwaye kufuneka ulungelelanise oko ubhalisele. Awuzukuhlala ufumana le nto uyifunayo kuba ngenene asinakukhetha ukuba sithandane naye. Ngoko ke kunokwenzeka ngokupheleleyo ukuba uya kugqiba ukuthandana a workaholic kanye okanye kabini ebomini bakho. Kodwa ukuqinisekisa okufanayo, nantsi imiqondiso yomntu othanda umsebenzi ofanele ukuba uyazi:

1. Umsebenzi uhlala ungowona uphambili kubo: Isidingo sokuphumelela kunye nokuqhubeka sizabalazela ngakumbi yeyona nto ibaqhubela emsebenzini wabo kwaye ibabangele bawukhoboke kuwo. Basenokuzama ukukuthuthuzela ngokuthi ungoyena ubalulekileyo kubo, kodwa ngaba akucacanga ukuba yintoni kanye kanye?
2. Bafumana i-paranoid xa bengasebenzi: Enoba bayagula okanye baseholideyini, isibakala sokuba abaphangeli siyabacaphukisa yaye sibenza babe noloyiko baze baphakuzele.
3. Abakwazi ukwahlula ubomi babo bobuqu kunye nobuchwephesha: Xa uthandana nomntu osebenza nzima, uya kuqaphela ukuba umsebenzi usoloko uza ekhaya kunye nabo. Amakhoboka omsebenzi axakeke kakhulu ngumsebenzi wawo kangangokuba abanakho ukuzoba umgca phakathi kobomi babo bobuqu kunye nobungcali
4. Bayakuthanda ukugqibelela: Bathatha ulawulo lwezinto kuba besazi ukuba ngabona babalaseleyo kwinto abayenzayo (eyona nto bayiyo). Abanelisekanga yimpumelelo yabo kwaye abakhe bayeke umsebenzi wabo kunye neenjongo zabo
5. Uziva ngathi uthetha nodonga: Zininzi izinto ofuna ukwabelana ngazo neqabane lakho, kodwa uxakeke kakhulu ngumsebenzi wakhe ukuba angakumamela into oyithethayo. A umphulaphuli olungileyo yinto angazange abe yiyo. Ukuba umcela ukuba athethe into, uya kuhlala ebhekisela kumsebenzi wakhe okanye angakuhoyi ngenxa yokuba uxakeke kakhulu ukucinga ngayo.

Kuba ngathi ubomi ngaphaya komsebenzi wakhe abukho. Kwaye asikusoli ngokuthi, “Inkwenkwe yam ingumntu othanda umsebenzi kwaye iyadinisa ngokupheleleyo”.

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Iingcebiso ezili-12 zokuhlangabezana nemeko xa uthandana nendoda esebenza nzima

Umntu olikhoboka lomsebenzi ufaka iingcingo engqondweni yakhe ukuze anikele ingqalelo kumsebenzi wakhe ukuze awenze eyona nto ibalulekileyo kuye, nokuba oko kuthetha ukuba akakuhoyi. Ngelinge lokwenjenjalo, ubandakanyeka kakhulu kubomi bakhe bomsebenzi kangangokuba ukuthanda kwakhe umsebenzi kongamela ezinye iimvakalelo, nto leyo emenza angaphenduli kwiimvakalelo zokwenyani kubudlelwane benu. Zonke ezi mvakalelo zikhoyo, kodwa kwinqanaba elisezantsi kwaye zihlala zisebenza xa zihambelana nomsebenzi.

Ngaba iqabane lakho lonwabile ngakumbi xa liqhuba kakuhle kwinkcazo-ntetho yakhe okanye livuya ngakumbi xa umenzele itheko lokuzalwa elimangalisayo?

Apho kukho ubudlelwane, kukho imibingelelo kunye ezininzi zokulalanisa njengokuba. Ubudlelwane bakho bujongene nemingeni emininzi kwaye ngamanye amaxesha ubona yonke into isiwa. Izibophelelo zakhe zomsebenzi zihlala zibonakala ziloyisa ubudlelwane bakho kwaye awuziva ufanelekile ukuba ube nomntu ongakuxabisiyo njengoko kufuneka.

Ewe, akukho budlelwane bugqibeleleyo, masikuxelele loo nto. Kodwa ukuba ufuna ukuyenza isebenze, ke ezi ngcebiso ezili-12 zokuhlangabezana nazo ziya kukunceda ulungelelanise nomntu osebenza nzima. Indlela yokuthandana nomntu osebenza nzima ukwenza uninzi lobudlelwane bakho? Siza kukuxelela, ngezantsi apha.

1. Yenzani ucwangciso phakathi kwenu nobabini

Amakhoboka omsebenzi awakwazi ukulinganisa umsebenzi kunye nobomi babo bomntu kwaye ngaloo ndlela babhideke iishedyuli zabo. Ukuze ulungise oko, unokucela iqabane lakho okanye umncedisi wakhe ngeshedyuli yakhe kwaye uzame ukuyidibanisa neyakho. Emva kokuthelekisa ezi zimbini, ninokwenza ucwangciso oluguquguqukayo apho nobabini ninokuchitha ixesha kunye ngaphandle koloyiko lokuthintela nakuphi na ukuzibophelela komsebenzi wakhe.

Soloko usenza indawo yonxunguphalo lomsebenzi, kuba uyazi ukuba baza kuza.

2. Ukuqonda kubalulekile

Amadoda alindele ukuba uwaqonde naxa engathethi kakhulu ngokuvakalayo kuba akathethi kakhulu ngeemvakalelo zawo. Kuya kufuneka uqonde ukuba kubaluleke kangakanani umsebenzi wakhe ukuze ubomi bakhe bobuchule buchume. Ukuzama ukuqonda icala lakhe ebalini kuya kukunceda uqonde ukuba kutheni kufuneka abe likhoboka lomsebenzi.

Ukuba uyamqonda yaye umnike ithuba, naye uya kukuqonda ukuzincama kwakho kungekudala okanye kamva, yaye mhlawumbi ade aqonde nendlela ebekutyeshele ngayo.

3. Mnike izinto ezothusayo ezincinci

Ke, kungoLwesibini kwaye ufunde ukuba unexesha ezandleni zakho kuba umphathi wakho akekho. Ungene nomfana wakho waqonda ukuba naye ukhululekile kwaye akanalo usuku oluxakekileyo. Xa kunjalo, ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kufuneka uzame ukuya eofisini yakhe kwaye umothuse! Ungaya nangexesha lesidlo sakhe sasemini kwaye ube nesidlo sasemini kunye naye. Izipho ngamaxesha kunye nezinto ezimangalisayo ezincinci ziyinto abafana ngokufihlakeleyo ngathi.

4. Indlela yokuthandana nomntu othanda umsebenzi? Musa ukuvumela umsebenzi uphazamise imihla yakhe

Endaweni yokugxila kuzo zonke iingxaki zakho zobudlelwane bomsebenzi, cinga ngento onokuyenza ukuguqula ezo zinto. Eli, linyathelo elibalulekileyo lokwenza okufanayo. Misela umgaqo wokuba iintsuku zekhefu zenzelwe nina nobabini. Mxelele kwasekuqaleni ukuba nawuphi na umsebenzi anawo kufuneka ugqitywe ngezolo ukuze ingqondo yakhe ingaphambuki kumsebenzi wakhe xa nikunye. Mxelele ukuba usuku olupheleleyo lwekhefu yinto yonke intombi ethandana nayo etshate nomsebenzi wayo ifanelwe.

5. Musa ukumngxolisa xa exakeke kakhulu

Uhamba kuxinzelelo oluninzi emsebenzini olumkhuphayo, uyayazi lonto. Emva koko, ukuba uyamngcungcuthekisa, umbize ngamagama okanye umsole uya kukhathazeka okanye ukuziphatha kwakhe kuya kwehla ecinga ukuba akakwazi ukuphatha yonke into kakuhle. Kunokuba umngcungcuthekise okanye ube krwada, yiba lula kuye uze uzame ukumenza aziqonde izinto ngendlela ezolileyo. Uya kuphendula ngokufanelekileyo ngakumbi kuloo nto.

6. Thetha naye ngayo

Ukunxibelelana ngeendlela ezimbini ibalulekile kulo lonke ubudlelwane. Thetha naye ngendlela ovakalelwa ngayo kwaye umenze ayiqonde imbono yakho. Umele ayazi indlela akwenza ngayo ngokukuthathela phantsi. Mxelele ukuba naye ufuna ukusebenzisana nawe. Thetha naye kwaye uzame ukulungisa izinto.

7. Zama ukuqonda ishishini lakhe kwaye ungalibizi nje ngokuba 'yingxaki yobudlelwane obusebenzayo'

Maxa wambi, xa abantu ababini bephuma kumashishini ahlukeneyo, kuba nzima ukuba elinye iqabane liqonde elinye kuba libona icala elinye kuphela lengqekembe. You may thnk all you are dealing with is dating a workaholic or call it ingxaki workaholic ubudlelwane, kodwa eneneni, akaxakekanga kuba efuna ukuba. Uxakekile kuba akana choice!

Ngokuphanda uxanduva lomsebenzi weqabane lakho kunye nemingeni yeshishini lakhe, uya kuba nako ukuqonda ukuba kutheni iqabane lakho kufuneka libe seenyawo zakhe imini yonke, kwaye kutheni mhlawumbi akakwazi ukwenza ixesha elaneleyo kuwe. Gcoba nzulu kwinto eyiyo ngokwenene ishishini lakhe. Ngaba uligqwetha? Okanye ngaba ugqirha usendleleni? Kuya kukunceda uqonde imbono yakhe ngcono.

8. Yamkele into yokuba ukuthandana nomntu othanda umsebenzi kuya kubanje

'Ndithandana njani nomntu olikhoboka lomsebenzi?' ngamanye amaxesha malunga nokwamkelwa nje ukuba enyanisweni, kubudlelwane kunye. Yeka ukulindela okuninzi, kwaye uqale ukwamkela izinto ngendlela eziyiyo. Ngamanye amaxesha, ukulindela ukuba iqabane lakho liya kutshintsha koko kukukhathaza ngakumbi. Xa ulindelo lufika luwela phantsi, uziva ukhathazekile kwaye kunjalo lonakalisa ubudlelwane bakho nangakumbi. Kufuneka uyamkele into yokuba ezinye izinto azinakuze zitshintshe, ngoko akuncedi nganto ukulindela ukuba zenjenjalo. Zibuze, ngaba kufanelekile ukuthandana nomntu osebenza nzima? ukuba uphendule loo nto ngokuvumayo, funda nje ukwamkela inyaniso kwaye usebenze ngayo.

9. Yiya kumcebisi ukuba ujongane ngakumbi neemvakalelo zakho

Kukho amaxesha apho nobabini ningenakukwazi ukunyamezela kwaye ubuhlobo buba bunzima. Nobabini aninako ukuba kunye kodwa kwaye anifuni ukuyenza ngaphandle komnye. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, iingcebiso zobudlelwane be-workaholic zibalulekile kwingcali eqondayo zombini iimbono kwaye inokukukhokela kwinto omawuyenze ngokulandelayo. Ke xa izinto zibonakala zimbi kakhulu, kuya kufuneka uye kumcebisi wobudlelwane kwaye usebenze izinto usebenzisa uncedo lwabo. Uya kumangaliswa ukuba kutheni ungazange ucinge ngayo kwasekuqaleni.

10. Zigcine uxakekile

Ukuba iqabane lakho lixakekile, oko akuthethi ukuba awufiki okanye akufanele ube nobomi bakho. Zibandakanye nobomi bakho kwaye uchithe 'ixesha lam' ukuze uphinde uqhagamshelane nawe. Gxila kuwe kunobudlelwane bakho, kuya kunceda ukwenza izinto zicace kuwe. Ukuchitha ixesha kude neqabane lakho ngamanye amaxesha kubalulekile ukwamkela isiqu sakho kwaye uzakhele ubuwena.

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11. Sebenzisa itekhnoloji ukuze uhlale uqhagamshelwe xa uthandana nomntu osebenza ixesha elide

Enkosi kubalingane bethu be-WhatsApp, i-Facebook, kunye ne-Skype, unokuhlala uqhagamshelene nabantu obathandayo, nangona bekude kangakanani kuwe. Ngoncedo lwetekhnoloji kunye nazo zonke ii -apps zethu ze-smartphone, unokuhlala unxibelelana neqabane lakho nangeentsuku ongakwaziyo ukudibana naye. Ukuhlala ungekho akuyi kuba nzima kangako xa nobabini nizibandakanya kwiifowuni zevidiyo rhoqo okanye nitshintshiselana nge-Snapchats kunye imini yonke. Xa uthandana nomgama omde osebenza nzima, qiniseka ukuba uhambe imayile eyongezelelweyo ukugcina ubudlelwane buqhubeka, okanye bunokujika bube yinto ubudlelwane bokugqibela ngokukhawuleza kakhulu.

12. Zama ukutshintsha imbono yakho

Ngeentsuku oye uzibuze ngazo ngokucaphukisayo imibuzo efana nale, 'Ngaba ulikhoboka lomsebenzi okanye akanamdla?' kwaye ucinge ngokuphelisa ubudlelwane, yenza konke okusemandleni akho ukutshintsha loo ngqondo ukuyeka ukucinga kakubi. Ukuthandana nomntu olikhoboka lomsebenzi isenokungabi yinto obuyilungiselele ukuyenza kodwa sele uyiyo. Ekubeni usaqhubeka nayo, unokucinga ngokutshintsha indlela ojonga ngayo abantu abasebenzisa iziyobisi endaweni yoko. Unokubona iinkalo ezintle zomntu osebenza nzima kwaye uzibeke ezihlangwini zabo.

Ngokwenza njalo, uya kuba nakho ukuqonda i-psychology yabo ngcono kwaye unokuqonda ukuba akubi kakhulu emva kwayo yonke into. Yimpendulo yakho kuyo eyona nto ibalulekileyo kwaye yenza umahluko omkhulu.

Ngaba Kufanelekile Ukuthandana Umntu Osebenza nzima?

Ngaba ngokwenene naziphi na iingenelo ukuthandana a workaholic? Okanye ngaba kufanelekile ukuthandana nomntu osebenza nzima ekuhambeni kwexesha?

Oku kuxhomekeke kubudlelwane. Umntu ngamnye unento ephambili eyahlukileyo kunye neengcinga ezahlukeneyo zobudlelwane obugqibeleleyo kwaye yiyo loo nto yohluka kumntu nomntu. Kwisibini esiquka omabini amaqabane angabantu abangamakhoboka omsebenzi, oku akunakuze kube yingxaki kuba bakwingqondo enye kwaye ke bakwiphepha elinye ngezinto ezininzi.

Kumfazi ofuna indoda yakhe ihlale ikhona inkxaso ngokweemvakalelo nangokwengqondo, ukuthandana nomntu okhotyokiswe ngumsebenzi akuyongcamango ilungileyo, kuba uya kufuna izinto angenakukwazi ukumnika zona. Ukuba ungumntu onomonde nokuqonda, ukuthandana nomntu osebenza nzima bekungayi kuba kubi kuwe kuba uya kukwazi ukusebenza ngendlela yakho kuyo. Konke kuxhomekeke ekubeni ungubani na kwezi, kwaye ungakanani na onokuthi ukwazi ukusingatha. Usenokubona iingenelo ezininzi zokuthandana nomntu osebenza nzima kwaye okunene uyonwabele!

Zazi izinto ezibalulekileyo kuwe kunye nezinto ozilindeleyo kubudlelwane emva koko uzenzele isigqibo. Kulula ukuthetha izinto ezinjengokuthi, 'Ngaba ulikhoboka lomsebenzi okanye akanamdla?' kwaye uhambe nje kude nobudlelwane. Kodwa yazi, ukuba nje elikhoboka lomsebenzi, akuthethi ukuba akakuthandi. Kuphela nje olu lwalamano luzisa iseti eyodwa yemingeni. Ungangeni entweni ungazi izibonda zayo, kuba iya kugqiba ikuvise kabuhlungu kwaye uya kuzaliswa kukuzisola. Yazi into ongena kuyo ngaphambi kokuba ubudlelwane bakho bubheke kwintshabalalo. Zibuze ukuba ingaba yiloo nto uyifunayo, kwaye okona kubaluleke kakhulu, yintoni ekufaneleyo, emva koko uthathe isigqibo. Uyayazi into ekulungeleyo, yaye oko kusenokuquka okanye kungaquki ukuthandana nomntu okhohliswe ngumsebenzi.

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