Injongo yomshado izwakala njengendaba enzima (cha, hhayi lolo hlobo lwendaba). Njengoba ubudlelwano kanye nezincazelo zokuzibophezela zishintsha futhi zanda, inhloso yomshado, uma ngempela ikhona, ivame ukulahleka olwandle lwemibandela yobudlelwane besimanje.
Nokho, akunakuphikwa ukuthi umshado unendawo yawo emhlabeni. Noma ngabe kungenxa yemizwa, yezezimali, noma yezomndeni; noma ngabe ubheka inhloso engokomoya yomshado, kufanele kube nesizathu (noma izizathu ezimbalwa) zokuthi kungani izinkulungwane zabantu bazo zonke izinkolo, izizwe, nobulili ziqhubeka nokuzibophezela komunye nomunye emishadweni yomshado.
Impela, akusiwo wonke umuntu, futhi abantu bavame ukuba nezimpikiswano eziqinile ngokumelene naleso sikhungo. Kodwa-ke, noma kunjalo, umshado uyaqhubeka njengobuciko obungapheli, noma umiyane ocasulayo, kuye ngokuthi uwubheka kanjani. Ngakho-ke, iyini incazelo nenjongo yomshado? Ingabe ikhona injongo eyinhloko yomshado, noma ingabe iyisikhungo esidala esingasasho lutho kangako? Ukuze sithole ukuqonda okwengeziwe, sixoxe nodokotela wengqondo u-Adya Poojari (Masters in Clinical Psychology), obhaliswe ne-Rehabilitation Council of India, ukuze athole umbono wakhe wobungcweti ngenhloso eyinhloko yomshado.
Umlando Womshado
Okuqukethwe
Ngaphambi kokuba sibheke injongo yomshado namuhla, ake sibheke umlando ukuze siqonde ukuthi lesi sikhungo saqala kanjani nokuthi nini. Namuhla, ubuhlobo bomshado bufana nokuqinisekiswa kothando nokuzibophezela kwabantu ababili komunye nomunye. Kuyisithembiso sokuthanda nokwazisa owesifazane oyedwa noma indoda eyodwa impilo yakho yonke ngoba awukwazi ukucabanga ukwabelana ngakho nomunye umuntu. Kodwa kwakungenjalo ngaso sonke isikhathi.
Eqinisweni, lapho uqala ukushada, umshado wawungeyona ngisho indlela yokuba owesilisa nowesifazane bahlangane njengomkhaya. Inhloso yomlando womshado kanye nesakhiwo somndeni esivela kuwo kwakuhluke kakhulu kulokho esikuqonda ukuthi uyikho namuhla. Nansi indlela:
Umshado waba khona eminyakeni engaba ngu-4 350 edlule
Ukuze umuntu aqonde ngempela injongo yomlando womshado, kufanele abheke futhi amangale ngeqiniso lokuthi lesi sikhungo sime isikhathi esingaphezu kwezinkulungwane ezine zeminyaka - iminyaka engu-4,350 ukuze kube nembile. Ubufakazi bokuqala obuqoshwe phansi bokuhlangana kwendoda eyodwa nowesifazane oyedwa buqala ngo-2350 BC. Ngaphambi kwalokho, imindeni yayingamayunithi ahlelekile anabaholi besilisa, abesifazane abaningi babehlanganyela phakathi kwabo, nezingane.
Ngemva kuka-2350 BC, umqondo womshado wemukelwa amaHeberu, amaRoma, namaGreki. Ngaleso sikhathi, umshado wawungelona ubufakazi bothando futhi wawungabhekwa njengesu likaNkulunkulu lokuhlanganisa owesilisa nowesifazane ukuphila kwabo konke. Kunalokho, kwakuyindlela yokuqinisekisa ukuthi izingane zomuntu ngezakhe. Ubuhlobo bomshado nabo basungula ubunikazi bendoda phezu kowesifazane. Nakuba ayekhululekile ukwanelisa izifiso zakhe zobulili nabanye - izifebe, izancinza, ngisho nezithandwa zabesilisa, inkosikazi kwakufanele inakekele imithwalo yemfanelo yasekhaya. Amadoda nawo ayekhululekile “ukubuyisela” omkawo, uma behluleka ukuzala abantwana, futhi athathe omunye.
Ngakho, ingabe umshado ungokweBhayibheli? Uma sibheka injongo yomlando yomshado, ngokuqinisekile yayingenjalo. Kodwa-ke, incazelo nenjongo yomshado iye yashintsha ngokuhamba kwesikhathi - futhi ukubandakanyeka kwenkolo kwaba nendima enkulu kulokho (okuningi kulokho kamuva).
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Umqondo wothando lwezothando kanye nokushada impilo yonke
Uma kubhekwa izinkulungwane zeminyaka yomlando womshado, umqondo wothando lwezothando kanye nokushada impilo yonke usemusha. Engxenyeni engcono kakhulu yomlando wesintu, ubuhlobo bomshado babusekelwe izizathu ezingokoqobo. Umqondo wothando lwezothando njengamandla okushayela umshado wabamba kuphela eNkathini Ephakathi. Endaweni ethile cishe ngekhulu le-12, izincwadi zaqala ukunikeza umqondo wokuthi indoda idinga ukuyenga owesifazane ngokuncoma ubuhle bakhe futhi izuze uthando lwakhe.
Encwadini yakhe ethi, A History of the Wife , isazi-mlando nombhali uMarilyn Yalom uhlola ukuthi umqondo wothando oluthandanayo washintsha kanjani uhlobo lobuhlobo bomshado. Ukuba khona kwabafazi kwakungasagcini ekukhonzeni amadoda. Amadoda nawo manje ayesefaka umzamo ebudlelwaneni , efuna ukukhonza abesifazane abathandayo. Kodwa-ke, umqondo wokuthi owesifazane uyimpahla yomyeni wakhe waqhubeka wanda kwaze kwaba sekuqaleni kwekhulu lama-20. Kwakuyilapho abesifazane emhlabeni wonke beqala ukuthola ilungelo lokuvota kuphela lapho ukuguquguquka phakathi kwemibhangqwana eshadile. Njengoba abesifazane bethola amalungelo engeziwe phakathi naleso sikhathi, umshado washintsha ngempela waba ubudlelwano babantu abalinganayo.
Iqhaza lenkolo emshadweni
Ngesikhathi esifanayo lapho umbono wothando lothando waqala ukuba yisisekelo sobudlelwano bomshado, inkolo yaba yingxenye ebalulekile yesikhungo. Izibusiso zompristi zaba yingxenye edingekayo yomshado, futhi ngo-1563, isimo sesakramente somshado samukelwa emthethweni we-canon. Lokhu kwakusho ukuthi,
- Kwakubhekwa njengenhlangano yaphakade - umqondo womshado wokuphila wangena esimweni
- Kwakubhekwa njengengunaphakade - uma ifindo seliboshiwe, alikwazi ukuqaqa
- Kwakubhekwa njengenyunyana engcwele - engaphelele ngaphandle kwemikhosi yenkolo
Umqondo wokuthi uNkulunkulu wadala umshado phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane nawo waba negalelo elikhulu ekuthuthukiseni isimo sabafazi emishadweni. Amadoda ayenqatshelwe ukuhlukanisa omkawo futhi afundiswa ukubaphatha ngenhlonipho enkulu. Imfundiso yokuthi “ababili bayoba nyamanye” yasakaza umqondo wokusondelana ngokocansi kuphela phakathi kwendoda nomkayo . Yilapho-ke umqondo wokwethembeka emshadweni waqala khona.
Iyini Injongo YeBhayibheli Yomshado?
Ngisho noma umqondo womshado wandulela umqondo wenkolo ehleliwe njengoba siwazi futhi siyiqonda namuhla (khumbula, ubufakazi bokuqala obuqoshiwe bezinsuku zomshado zafika ku-2350 BC - Ngaphambi kukaKristu), endaweni ethile lapho lezi zikhungo ezimbili ziye zahlangana eduze. Hhayi nje ebuKristwini kuphela, kodwa cishe kuzo zonke izinkolo emhlabeni wonke, imishado ithathwa “njengeyenziwe ezulwini”, “eklanywe uSomandla”, futhi yenziwa ngomkhosi wenkolo.
Nakuba impendulo ethi “umshado ingokweBhayibheli” incike kakhulu okholweni lomuntu nasemibonweni yezenkolo, akunakuphikwa ukuthi ukuxhumana phakathi komshado nenkolo kuye kwaqiniswa ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Kunoma ubani ofuna ukuqondiswa uthando lukaNkulunkulu, inhloso yeBhayibheli yomshado ingafingqwa ngokuthi:
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1. Ubungane
“Akukuhle ukuba indoda ibe yodwa, ngiyakumenzela umsizi omfaneleyo” (Gen 2:18). IBhayibheli lithi uNkulunkulu waklama umshado ngendlela yokuba umbhangqwana oshadile usebenze njengeqembu elinamandla ukuze ukhulise umkhaya futhi wenze intando kaNkulunkulu emhlabeni.
2. Okokuhlengwa
“Ngakho-ke indoda iyakushiya uyise nonina, inamathele kumkayo, babe nyamanye” – (Gen 2:24). Leli vesi leTestamente Elisha lithi injongo yomshado kwakuwukuhlenga amadoda nabesifazane ezonweni zabo. Bayahamba futhi banamathele ukwakha umndeni futhi bawuvikele emathonyeni angaphandle. Ngokusho komyalezo kaJesu Kristu, umshado onempilo ngumsebenzi oqhubekayo, ohlose ukuqinisa ubudlelwano umbhangqwana obabelana ngawo.
3. Ukubonakaliswa kobudlelwane bukaNkulunkulu nebandla
“Ngokuba indoda iyinhloko yomfazi, njengokuba noKristu eyinhloko yebandla, engumzimba wakhe yena ongumsindisi wawo.” Njengoba nje ibandla lithobela uKristu, kanjalo nabafazi mabathobele amadoda abo ezintweni zonke. Madoda thandani omkenu, njengoba nje noKristu alithanda ibandla futhi wazinikela ngenxa yalo.”— Efesu 5:23-25 .
Injongo yomshado eBhayibhelini iwukubonisa uthando lukaNkulunkulu ngebandla lakhe ngokubonisa uthando olufanayo kumngane womuntu wokuphila.
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4. Ezocansi kanye nokuzala
“Jabula ngomfazi wobusha bakho… kwangathi amabele akhe angakusuthisa njalo.”— IzAga 5:18-19 .
Umshado onempilo uhlanganisa izinhlobo ezahlukene zokusondelana phakathi kombhangqwana. Abashadile akumelwe nje baxhumane ngokwengqondo, ngokomoya nangokomzwelo kodwa futhi nangocansi. Ukusondelana ngokocansi kuyinjongo ebalulekile yomshado.
Injongo yebhayibheli yomshado ihlanganisa nokusebenzisa ubudlelwano bocansi ekuzaleni. “Zalani nande ngesibalo.”—Genesise 1:28. Nokho, lokhu akusho ukuthi imishado engenabantwana iyantula ngandlela-thile ekufezeni injongo eyayihloselwe yona. Ochwepheshe abaningi bemibhalo engcwele bakholelwa ukuthi ukuzala njengenjongo yomshado eBhayibhelini kwakungasho nje ukuba nezingane. Umbhangqwana ungaba nokuzala kwezinye izici zokuphila futhi ube neqhaza ohlelweni lukaNkulunkulu ngokusebenzela ukwakha imiphakathi eqinile.
5. Ukuze uthole isivikelo esonweni
“Kepha uma bengenakuzibamba, mabashade, ngokuba kungcono ukuganwa kunokushiswa yinkanuko.”—1 Korinte 7:9.
Njengoba imibhalo yenkolo ibheka ubulili ngaphandle komshado njengesenzo sokuziphatha okubi kobulili, ukuvimbela isono kungase futhi kubhekwe njengenye yezinjongo zomshado. Nokho, akuyona injongo eyinhloko yomshado eBhayibhelini ngokuthatha isikhathi eside. Kuphinde kugcizelelwe iqiniso lokuthi inkanuko yocansi kumele indoda nomfazi babelane ngayo emshadweni, hhayi ngaphandle kwawo.
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Ukwelulekwa Ngomshado: Imigomo Eyi-15 Okufanele Ihlangatshezwe, Kusho Uchwepheshe Wezokwelapha
Ziyini Izinjongo Zomshado Namuhla?
Manje njengoba sesike sathinta ukuvela komshado, ukuthi inhloso yawo yavela kanjani phakathi namakhulu eminyaka, nokuthi inkolo iyichaza kanjani indawo yobudlelwano bomshado emphakathini, ake sibheke ukuthi lesi sikhungo sifeza yiphi inhloso esikhathini samanje. Ngokuka-Adya, nakuba wonke umuntu enemibono yakhe mayelana nencazelo nenjongo yomshado, kunezici ezithile ezivamile ezithonya izinqumo zabantu abaningi zokushada. Khumbula, kunzima ukwenza okuvamile kulesi sikhathi samanje, kodwa sihlanganise izizathu nezinjongo ezijulile ezisho ukuthi umshado usasesimeni esihle.
1. Umshado uletha ukulondeka okungokomzwelo
Ngingumfundisi wenoveli yezothando, futhi ekukhuleni kwami, kwakubonakala sengathi zonke izindaba zami engizikhonzile ziphetha ngendlela efanayo – owesifazane ogqoke ijazi ende, emhlophe, ehamba ngendlela yesonto eqonde kumlingani wakhe womphefumulo. Kwakungowesilisa, omude futhi emuhle, owayezomnakekela kuze kube phakade. Umshado waletha isiqiniseko, ukuqaphela okukhululekile kokuthi wawungasadingi ukukhathazeka.
Umhlaba usushintshile futhi umshado awuseyona yodwa indlela yokumemezela nokuvala uthando lwenu. Noma kunjalo, kunzima ukuthola enye indawo noma isethi yemikhuba enikeza isiqiniseko esingaka. Amanani esehlukaniso angase abe phezulu, ubudlelwano basekhaya buvame kakhulu, kodwa uma kukhulunywa ngakho, awuqiniseki kangako njengoba unjalo uma unendandatho emunweni wakho bese uhlebela uthi, 'Ngiyaqiniseka.'
“Sinesimo sokukholelwa ukuthi umshado umzuzu ‘wokushada’ wobudlelwano bothando,” kusho u-Adya. “Uma othile ekucela ukuba ushade naye, ingqondo yakho ivele ithi ‘Yebo, bangithanda ngempela!’” Amasiko athandwayo, imiphakathi njll. konke kusitshela ukuthi umshado ophumelelayo ufana nokugoqwa ngengubo efudumele yokuphepha nokuqiniseka. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kuyiqiniso noma cha, akungabazeki ukuthi abaningi bethu bakholelwa kuwo ngentshiseko, okwenza kube yinjongo enkulu yomshado.
2. Uma ukhuliswe ngokwenkolo, umshado uyisibopho sokugcina
UNichole uthi: “Umkhaya wakithi uyithanda kakhulu inkolo. “Ngajola nesixuku sabantu esikoleni samabanga aphezulu kodwa ngangihlale ngifundiswa ukuthi umshado uwumgomo ngoba uNkulunkulu ethanda. Ukuhlala ndawonye ngaphandle komshado kwakungeyona inketho. Futhi ngangingafuni, futhi ngangingafuni. Ngangithanda ukuthi kwakunenjongo yomshado ejulile, engcwele nengokomoya, kangangokuthi kwenye indawo, emehlweni kaNkulunkulu nomndeni wami, ngenze okulungile.”
Injongo yeBhayibheli yomshado ihlanganisa ukukhulisa izingane, kanye nobungane nokusekelana phakathi kwendoda nomkayo. Ezinye izinjongo ezingokomoya zomshado, noma iyiphi inkolo noma indlela engokomoya oyikhethile ukuyilandela, futhi, iseluleko sokuthi umshado uyisenzo sokugcina sothando, esisifundisa ukunakekela othile ngokujulile, ngaphandle kwethu.
"Ngokomlando, futhi ngisho namanje, injongo eyinhloko yomshado iwukuthi abantu ababili bayathandana futhi bazokwazi ukweseka omunye nomunye. Ngomqondo wawo ojulile, umshado uwuphawu lokuthi bakulungele ukuhlanganyela ukuphila kwabo okuseduze," kusho u-Adya. Kukhona okumele kushiwo mayelana nokungena enhlanganweni engcwele, engaqondakali lapho uthando lungekho nje ngawe nomngane wakho womshado, kodwa lapho uthola khona ukuvunyelwa kanye nezibusiso zalabo obathandayo kakhulu. Uhlale ucabanga ukuthi uthando lungolwaphezulu, futhi umshado wavele wakuqinisekisa.
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3. Umshado unikeza izivikelo ezithile
Ukuze singakhohlwa, umshado ugxile kakhulu ekuvikelweni kwabesifazane. Esikhathini eside ngaphambi kokuba imikhosi esemthethweni neyenkolo ibe yingxenye yawo, umshado wawumayelana nokuqinisekisa ukuthi owesifazane uphephile futhi uyanakekelwa. Eminyakeni edlule, ukuvikelwa kuye kwathatha izindlela eziningi - ukuvimbela isizungu kanye nezingxabano zezimali , ilungelo lempahla, ukugcinwa kwezingane uma kwenzeka isehlukaniso nokuningi.
“Uma ngikhuluma iqiniso, lapho ngicabanga ngokuthi kungani ngashada, ngikhumbula amazwi athi ‘umshwalense wezempilo ongcono’,” kuhleka uKristy. "Ungangiphathi kabi, ngiyamthanda umyeni wami, kodwa kwakukhona okunye okwakucatshangelwa, futhi. Njengowesifazane ongashadile, ngihlala ngingedwa, ngangisengozini yezinto eziningi. Kuthiwani uma kwakukhona isigebengu? Kuthiwani uma ngishelela futhi ngiwele endlini, futhi ngingakwazi ukubiza noma ubani? Futhi, njengoba nje ukushada ngemali kuzwakala njenge-mercenary kakhulu, nginemali engenayo emibili."
Njengoba sikhuluma ngamaqiniso, nanka amanye abandayo, aqinile. Enye injongo engokoqobo yomshado iwukuqeda isizungu nokungashadi, kodwa akulimazi lapho futhi unciphisa ibhalansi yebhange elilodwa futhi unezela kukho.
Mhlawumbe imali ayiyona injongo eyinhloko yomshado, nakuba kungaba njalo, kodwa ukulondeka ngokwezimali kuyisici esikhulu. Ngaphezu kwalokho, njengoba umshado uyisibopho esingokomthetho, ungaba nesivumelwano ngaphambi kokushada futhi uqinisekise ukuthi wena nanoma yiziphi izingane onazo niyanakekelwa ngisho noma umshado ungasebenzi. Ekugcineni, isici esiwusizo senhlangano singaba incazelo nenjongo yomshado.
4. Emshadweni, izindaba zomndeni
“Ngakhulela ekhaya lomndeni omkhulu, futhi angikwazanga ukucabanga ngenye into ehlukile kimi,” kusho uRamon. “Nganginezizathu ezimbili eziyinhloko zokushada – ngangifuna ukusukuma ngimemezele ukuzibophezela kwami kumlingani wami phambi komndeni wami; futhi ngangifuna ukukhulisa umndeni wami omkhulu. Ngangingafuni ukukwenza nomlingani esihlala naye ndawonye , ngangifuna ukukwenza nonkosikazi. Kwakulula kanjalo.”
"Enye yezinjongo eziyinhloko zomshado iwukuba nezingane, ukudlulisela igama lomndeni, ukuba nefa elicebile, kokubili elibonakalayo nelingabonakali, ukudlula phansi. Yiqiniso, izikhathi ziyashintsha, abantu bakhetha ukungabatholi abantwana, noma ukutholwa kunokuzala abantwana bemvelo. Kodwa ezimweni eziningi, lokhu kuseyisici esiyinhloko enjongweni yomshado," kusho u-Adya.
Umndeni ubulokhu ubhekwa njengengxenye eyinhloko yezenhlalo nengokomzwelo, futhi ngokuvamile, umshado uyingqikithi yawo. Ngakho-ke, injongo eyodwa eyinhloko yomshado iwumqondo wokuqhubeka. Ngomshado, ngezingane, uthola ukudlulisela ufuzo, amakhaya, ifa lomndeni, futhi ngethemba nomuzwa oqinile wothando nokuba ngowabanye. Kunzima ukuthola inhloso ebaluleke kakhulu.
5. Emehlweni omhlaba, umshado uqinisekisa ubuhlobo bakho
Sesihambe ibanga elide ekuboneni umshado njengowukuphela kwendlela yokubonisa ukuzinikela nothando lwakho. Kukhona ubudlelwano obuphilayo, ubudlelwano obuvulekile, i-polyamory kanye nenqwaba yemizwa nezincazelo zokuveza imizwa yakho ngothile. Nokho, umshado usalokhu uyinto yembulunga yonke, into eyaziwayo futhi, masibhekane nayo, kulula ukuyichaza kubantu abaningi kunezinye izinhlobo zokuzibophezela.
“Ngangijabule ngendlela emangalisayo lapho abantu be-LGBTQ bengase bashade endaweni yangakithi,” kusho uChristina. "Bengihlale nomlingani wami iminyaka emine, sahlala ndawonye ezimbili zazo. Kwakumnandi, kwakungekho sengathi kukhona okushodayo. Kodwa, ngangifuna ukumbiza ngomkami, futhi ngibe unkosikazi nami, futhi ngibe nomshado kanye nephathi. Ngicabanga ukuthi, kithi, ukukhetha kwakubalulekile, futhi ukumemezela obala uthando lwethu kwakumangalisa."
Umshado uletha ukuqinisekiswa okusemthethweni, okungokwenkolo, kanye nokwezenhlalo, futhi noma ngabe lokho akuyona into yakho ngempela, kukhona okulula okuthile kuwo. Umshado uletha izinzuzo eziningi. Ukufuna amafulethi kulula, ukuthenga ukudla kuhle futhi awusadingi ukubhekana namashiya aphakanyisiwe uma wethula umuntu 'njengomlingani'. Lezi yizinto okufanele uzikhumbule lapho uzibuza, " Ingabe umshado uyakufanelekela? "
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6. Ngendlela yawo engcono kakhulu, umshado ukunika ubungane ukuphila kwakho konke
Ku-movie ethi, Shall We Dance , umlingiswa kaSusan Sarandon uthi, “Emshadweni, uthembisa ukukhathalela yonke into. Izinto ezinhle, ezimbi, izinto ezimbi, izinto ezivamile… konke, ngaso sonke isikhathi, nsuku zonke. Uthi, ‘Impilo yakho ngeke inganakwa ngoba ngizoyiqaphela. Impilo yakho ngeke inganakwa ngoba ngizoba ufakazi wakho.’”
Ngikholelwa ukuthi yonke into eshiwo nguSusan Sarandon, noma ngabe umlingiswa amdlalayo kuphela. Kodwa uma sikhuluma iqiniso, kunobumnene neqiniso kulawa mazwi ngisho nesishoshovu esiqinile esimelene nomshado esingakuthola kunzima ukusiphika. Ekugcineni, uthando lumayelana nokuqaphela omunye wakho obalulekile ngangokunokwenzeka ngobuntu, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi imininingwane mincane kangakanani. Futhi umshado ukusondeza kancane ekutheni ukwazi ukwenza lokho, ngoba, awugcini nje ngokuhlanganyela indawo yokuhlala, wafunga ukuthi nizoba ndawonye kuze kube phakade. Futhi, uyazi, ingunaphakade igcwele izikhathi ezibonakala zincane kanye nemininingwane indoda noma umfazi angayibona ngoba yingakho belapho.
U-Adya uthi: “Umshado uwukuthembana, ukuthuthukisa inhlonipho ebuhlotsheni, ukuwenza ube into enhle nenenjongo.” Nakuba kungenakwenzeka ukwazi othile ngaphakathi ngisho nanjengomngane womshado, ngethemba lokuthi nizothola isikhathi esanele ndawonye ukuze nazane ngokwanele,” kusho u-Adya.
“Mhlawumbe isigaba somshado sesiphelile , futhi ubuhle bungase buphele ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, kodwa okusele yingxoxo kanye nobungane. Futhi ngethemba ukuthi niyazazi izimiso zokuziphatha nezingokomzwelo zomunye nomunye futhi niyazi ukuthi niyajabula ngokuchitha isikhathi nabo nokuba khona ndawonye,” uyanezela. Singathanda ukukholelwa ukuthi inhloso yanoma yiluphi ubudlelwano bothando ukuba ndawonye. Ukuthola izimiso zethu ezingcolile nokubona ukuthi singakwazi kangakanani ukuba nothando. Futhi mhlawumbe inhloso eyinhloko yomshado ukuthi isinika indlela evunyelwe emphakathini yokwenza lokhu.
Izikhombi Ezibalulekile
- Inhloso yomshado iye yavela phakathi namakhulu eminyaka, iqala njengobudlelwano bokuhwebelana ukuze bugxile othandweni
- Ubungane, ukuhlengwa, ukusondelana ngokobulili, ukuzala, nokuvikelwa esonweni ngezinye zezinjongo zomshado eBhayibhelini.
- Ezikhathini zanamuhla, umshado uye washintsha waba ubudlelwano babantu abalinganayo abanganikeza induduzo, ubungane, isakhiwo somndeni, kanye nezinye izinzuzo.
- Yize lesi sikhungo simile isikhathi eside, kungenzeka ukuthi akuwona wonke umuntu. Uma ukhetha ukungashadi noma izimo zakho zingakuvumeli, ungacabangi ukuthi kukususa ukubaluleka kwakho kwezenhlalo noma ukubaluleka kwakho njengomuntu nganoma iyiphi indlela.
Umshado awufinyeleleki kuwo wonke umuntu. Ubulili bakho, ubulili bakho, ipolitiki yakho, inkolo yakho, konke lokhu kungakuvimbela ukuba ushade ezindaweni ezithile. Umshado awuhlanganisi yonke into, futhi ezimweni eziningi, ungase ungahlangani nemizwa. Akukho kulokhu okwehlisa amandla noma ukubaluleka komphakathi, noma kunjalo. Umshado usumdala kakhulu, unezimpande ezijulile futhi unemigilingwane eminingi kanye nemibukiso ezungeze wona ukuthi ungaqedwa into ebonakala ingenamsebenzi njengokuntula umuzwa.
Kodwa uma kwenziwa kahle, uma kwenziwa ngokuzithandela nangomusa owanele nezihlobo ezimbalwa, ngokuqinisekile umshado ufeza injongo. Yebo, kumayelana nezezimali, nokukhulisa umndeni wendabuko nokukholelwa kuNkulunkulu onamandla okusenza singajabuli kakhulu uma senza izinto ezingaphandle komshado. Kodwa hheyi, imayelana ne-champagne nekhekhe nezipho kanye ne-honeymoon.
Kodwa ekugcineni, inhloso eyinhloko yomshado, sinomuzwa wokuthi, ingenye yezindlela eziningi, eziningi zokuma phambi kwesixuku futhi wazise isithandwa sakho somphefumulo ukuthi uneqolo labo. Ukuthi ngokuqina nokuncane, ibhalansi yebhange elilodwa noma amabili, ukugula, umshuwalense wezempilo nempilo, niyohlala ninomunye. Manje, ngisho inkalankala yami, umuntu omdala uzovuma ukuthi ayikho inhloso enkulu kunaleyo.
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