4 Ngā Tohu Wehenga Kāore Koe e Āta Whakahāwea i roto i tō Hononga

Ahakoa e mōhio ana koe kua tata te mutunga o tētahi whanaungatanga, kia mau tonu ai te mahana me te haumaru i roto i tō kōpuku haumaru, tera pea kei te wareware koe ki ngā tohu katoa o te wehenga, ā, kei te piri tonu ki ngā hihi pouri o te tumanako. He maha ngā wā, ka tīmata te pakaru o ngā whanaungatanga i ngā huarahi e kore pea e taea e koe te whakatika.

Kāore he otinga mō ngā raruraru katoa, ā, kāore hoki he pai mō ngā whanaungatanga katoa kia mau tonu. Ahakoa te hiahia o te tangata ki te whakapono ki te rerekē, i ētahi wā he pai ake te tuku i ngā mea kia haere, kia haere atu. Tērā pea ka mamae i ngā rā tuatahi, engari i roto i te wā ka mōhio koe i tika tāu mahi.

Ngā Tohu Whakatūpato Kua Tae Te Wā Hei Wehe

Kāore te whanaungatanga e tūtaki ki te matenga ohorere e puta mai ana i te rangirua. Ae, he ahua ohorere, he nanakia hoki te wehenga i a koe e wehe atu ana i tō hoa me ngā whanonga e karapoti ana i a ia, engari he maha ngā wā ka wareware tātou ki ngā tohu wehenga o te wehenga e tata mai ana, kua roa e tatari ana. Ka tīmata te paitini ki te whakauru i roto i ngā whakawhitiwhiti kōrero o ia rā, ā, i mua i tō kitenga atu, ka pōrearea koe i te hiahia kia wehe atu i tō hoa.

Ka taea e koe te whakamama i te ohorere mā te aro nui ki ngā pakaru kua tīmata pea te puta. Ko te tumanako ka taea e tēnei tuhinga te āwhina i a koe, engari me kī atu ahau ki a koe, koinei pea ngā take i whakaaro koe ka whakatauhia e koe i roto i te wā. Ko ēnei ngā haki whero o te whakaipoipo Ehara i te mea me tere te wehenga atu i te whanaungatanga, engari me whakaae koe he raruraru ēnei e whakamate ana i tō whanaungatanga. Kei a koe te tikanga mēnā he tohu tēnei hei wehe atu, he raruraru rānei e hiahia ana koe ki te whakatau. Ko tā mātou anake he āwhina i a koe kia mōhio ake ki a koe anō.

Te pānui e pā ana: 15 ngā tohu ngaro e whakaatu ana ka wehe wawe tō hoa i a koe

1. Ngā raruraru ki te whakawhirinaki

"Kia nui te maia ki te whakawhirinaki i te aroha i tetahi atu wa, me te wa kotahi atu."
- Maya Angelou

He mea tino nui te whakawhirinaki i roto i te pūtake o tētahi whanaungatanga. Ina kī ahau he whakawhirinaki i roto i ngā whanaungatanga katoa, ko te tikanga he whanaungatanga kare ā-roto kei a koe me tētahi atu tangata – hoa, whānau me ētahi atu. Kāore he take ki te kī ko tēnei ture e pā ana ki tō hoa aroha, pērā i ētahi atu whanaungatanga, ki te kore e hohonu ake.

Ina kitea koe e whakapae ana, e pāngia ana rānei e te whakapae tonu, kāore he take, noho ki raro, kōrero ki a koe anō. Ehara te whanaungatanga i te mahi uaua, engari he kāinga i hangaia hei whakamama i tō oranga kī tonu i te mahi. Waihoki, ko te whakapae tonu ka tohu pea kei te rapu koe i tētahi take hei whakamutu i tēnei. E rapu ana koe i taupānga hei hopu i te tangata tinihanga, te ngana rānei ki te kimi i ngā rerekētanga i roto i ana kōrero – ko te tikanga katoa kei te āwangawanga koe mō tana teka ki a koe.

Tirohia ō whakaaro, kia mārama ki tō whāinga: tera pea ko ngā tautohetohe tonu mō ōna hoa mahi, ko tana whanaungatanga huna rānei ki tana waea pūkoro, kei te ngana ki te mahi i tua atu i te whakangoikore i a koe i te kare ā-roto. Ko tētahi o ngā tohu me wehe atu kōrua ko te wā e nui rawa ai tō manukanuka nā te kore o tō whakawhirinaki.

Ae, i ētahi wā ka puta te whakapae i tō whakaaro iti ki a koe anō, ā, kāore e kitea he take e kore ai tō hoa e tinihanga i a koe. Ahakoa te ahua pōhēhē, he tikanga paitini tonu i roto i tō whanaungatanga. Ahakoa i mua kua he tō hoa i tētahi taahiraa, ā, e tika ana kia whakapaetia, kia mahara kua murua e koe tōna hara i taua wā. Ki te mea kāore anō koe kia murua, kia wareware rānei, he whakatau kino pea tēnei hei whakatipu i te paitini, ā, ko tētahi o ngā tohu wehenga kāore e taea e koe te karo.

2. Te kore aro me te noho tawhiti

Ka tūtaki pea ngā tāngata tokorua e ngana ana ki te pupuri i te whanaungatanga pai i roto i ō rāua ao i ngā wā uaua. He mea nui ngā whaki, ngā tautohetohe, ngā kōrero noa rānei hei huarahi whakawhitiwhiti kōrero. Ahakoa ngā pakanga, kāore e taea te karo, ā, i ētahi wā ka āwhina i te whakatau i te maha o ngā raruraru. ngā tueke kare ā-roto.

Engari ki te rongo koe i a koe anō, i tō hoa rānei, kāore e aro ki ēnei huarahi whakawhitiwhiti kōrero, kia tino mōhio koe he mea kāore i te tika i konei. Ehara i te mea he whakataetae tēnei mō te whakataurite i tō hiahia ki ngā kupu, engari ki te whakapuaki tetahi o kōrua i a koe anō, ā, ka puta atu tetahi i te rūma, ka hoki anō ki te tirotiro i tana waea, ka kōrero rānei mō te rangi, kei te kore koe e whakapau kaha ki te pupuri i tō kōrua whanaungatanga.

Ko tētahi o ngā tohu whakatūpato o tētahi whanaungatanga e kore e taea te karo ko te wā e whakatau ana kōrua ki te mutu te aro atu ki ngā raruraru. He rite te whanaungatanga ki tētahi tipu. Me whakamakuku kia ataahua ai tōna tipu. Engari, ki te kore tetahi o koutou e hiahia ki te mahi i taua mea anō, tērā pea kei te pakaru tō kōrua whanaungatanga.

Te pānui e pā ana: E rima ngā tohu e kore ia e aro ki a koe mō tētahi atu

3. Te kōwhiri i ngā niti

(Whakakape: Whakakapia te kupu 'ia' ki te kupu 'ia' e ai ki tōu whakaaro)

Kāo, ehara i te mea me kōrero reka tonu koe ki a ia, me te whakamoemiti i a ia mō te take, te take rānei. Engari ko te kimi i ōna hapa katoa me te whakatika i a ia i ia taahiraa, kāore e āwhina, ā, ko tētahi o ngā tohu tēnei mō te pakaru. Ko te whanaungatanga ehara i te whanaungatanga ōrite, e kore e roa te pumau.

Ko tāu whakahē tonu i a ia e whakaatu ana i tō whakahawea, ā, ka tere te kawa o ngā mea. Engari ina hurihia te tēpu, kei te tino pai tō parepare. Tērā pea ka pakaru ia i tō parepare i a koe e tautohetohe ana ki ana tautohe me tō arero koi. Engari e mōhio ana koe kei te rite ēnei mea katoa ki te pakanga, kaua ki te waihanga i tētahi oranga whai tikanga tahi?

He pai te whakahē pono ki tētahi wāhi hei whakapūmau i te whanaungatanga. Engari ki te huri hei whakatoi, nui rawa ngā tautohetohe whanaungatanga, te kōrero kino, me te titiro noa ki te taha kino o ngā mea – koinei tētahi o ngā tohu ka wehe kōrua.

Kāore he whanaungatanga e ora tonu i roto i te taiao pakanga, e mau tonu ana ngā pū a te tokorua. Whakarongo ki tā mātou tohutohu. Me kī he ōrite, ka hoki whakamuri mō ake tonu atu i mua i te kino haere o te āhuatanga, me kōrero rānei i mua i te kawa rawa o tō kōrua whanaungatanga.

4. Whakaarohia te take i konei ai koe

Ko tētahi o ngā tohu wehenga ko te pāwhiri i tēnei pou. Whakaarohia, he aha koe i konei ai? Ko te whakautu pea kei konei koe hei tirotiro i te porangi o te Ipurangi i tēnei rā, hei arotake rānei i tō whanaungatanga whakamutunga i raro i ēnei rama.

Kei te whakaaroaro anō rānei koe ki te roanga o te oranga o tō whanaungatanga. Kua kōrero koe ki a koe anō, ki tō hoa rānei. Kei te rapu take koe hei whakamana i te whakatau e hangai ana i roto i tō hinengaro? Āe, e hoa, kāore e taea e te Ipurangi te whakatau i taua whakatau māu. Me arotake e koe ō ake tohu whakatūpato i roto i te whanaungatanga i te mutunga o te rā.

Noho tahi me koe anō, ngana ki te mārama ki te raruraru e pā ana ki tō kōrua whanaungatanga. Kōrerohia mārire, mā te pakeke, me tō hoa, kia mārama hoki ki ōna whakaaro. Whakatauhia ngā mea i mua i te tīmatanga o te kino ki te whakarerekē i a koe hei tangata.

Ki te tino mōhio koe ki ngā tohu ka wehe kōrua, kua tae pea te wā ki te kohikohi i te maia me te wehe atu. I ētahi wā, koinei te mea pai rawa atu.

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