Kāore au e hiahia ki te marena mēnā ko te tikanga he marena mō te whānau katoa
Ripanga o Ihirangi
I ētahi rā kua pahure ake nei, i kōrero ahau ki tētahi wahine taitamariki, 21 tau te pakeke, ā, i tino whakahē ia ki te whakaaro o te marena. I pai ia ki te whai hoa rangatira, tae atu ki ngā tamariki, engari kaua ki te marena. "Ki te marena ahau, ka pau katoa tōku oranga ki te whakatutuki i ngā tumanakohanga a ngā whānau e rua. Ki te kore ahau e marena, ka taea e au te whai i tōku ake oranga," ko tāna tēnei.
Nāna ahau i whakaaro. I ngā whenua o te Hauāuru, he tokomaha te hunga e kore e moe tāne, engari he ataahua te āhua o tō rātou kāinga. Inaa, i roto i tētahi uiuinga, i kī tētahi o ngā tāne me ngā wāhine roa rawa atu o Hollywood, a Goldie Hawn rāua ko Kurt Russell, i ora tonu tā rāua hononga mō ngā tau 34 nā te mea kāore rāua i moe tāne.
Kei te ara ake te hunga taitamariki o Īnia ki te āheinga o te hononga hoa me te kore marena, nā te mea, kua roa rawa te marena o Īnia e hinga ana ki ngā tono a te whānau Īnia. I muri i te marena, tera pea ka neke te tangata ki tētahi whare hou, ka neke rānei ki tētahi tāone hou, engari he maha ngā wā he uaua ki te mawhiti atu i te whānau me ngā taumahatanga e mau mai ana.
E rima ngā take e uaua ai ki ngā hoa rangatira Īnia te aro atu ki ngā pēhanga e piki haere ana o te whānau Īnia.
1. Kua moe koe ki te whānau, ehara i te hoa rangatira
I te marena taku hoa tino whai rawa ki tana hoa tāne tino whai rawa, ā, i hiahia rāua kia marena ki Kariki. I harikoa ngā whānau e rua ki te whakaaro o te marena ki Phuket, engari i hiahia tōna whaea kia marena ki Udaipur. Mai i taua wā, mai i te haerenga ki Phuket, ki te tae o ngā kākahu o te wahine marena hou me te tāne marena hou, ki te tahua kai me te waina, ka noho katoa hei pakanga i waenganui i ngā whānau e rua. I tere tonu te pana atu i ngā hiahia o te tokorua e aroha nui ana ki te taha me te kī "he taitamariki rawa kōrua ki te mōhio ki tetahi mea" ā, ka haere tonu te pakanga.
I mua i te marena, i pouri ahau i te kitenga i taku hoa e ahua raruraru ana, e taumaha ana, e ngenge ana. I whakaaro tonu ahau, mehemea koinei te āhua i mua i te marena, he aha te mea ka tupu i muri i te marena?
Engari koinā te mea pono. Kāore pea i te marena haere noa iho, engari he marena noa iho pea me te phere o te wā, engari ko te āhua nei kei te rite tonu. Kia mārenatia kōrua, ka whakarērea e kōrua te tika ki te noho ko kōrua anake. Ina oti i a kōrua te oati, ka noho kōrua hei wāhanga o tētahi whānau whānui e whai tikanga ana ngā kare ā-roto o te katoa engari ko ōu ake.
Ina puaki tonu i a koe ngā kupu taurangi, ka noho koe hei wāhanga o tētahi whānau whānui e whai tikanga ana ngā kare ā-roto o te katoa engari ko ōu ake kare ā-roto.
2. He mea e tika ana kia noho tahi koe me te pokanoa
He tika te whakauru atu a ia mema o ia whānau Īnia ki ō koutou take. Me whakaae koe ki tēnā, me hoatu hoki ki a rātou te mea e tika ana.
Nō nā tata nei, i muri i te matenga o tētahi matua kēkē, i haere ahau ki te toro i tōna whānau. I haere mai te whānau katoa ki te whakapuaki i te pouri, me te kōrero anō hoki mō ngā kawa whakamutunga, me pēhea te whakahaere i te hui, me te tahua kai.
I te ahiahi, i moe poto te hunaonga wahine ngenge o te whānau, ā, i mahi tahi rāua me te tini o ngā manuhiri e haere mai ana ki te tuku i ō rāua aroha. I te taenga mai o te wā tī, ka whakatau tētahi whaea kēkē kia whakaarahia te hunaonga wahine, nā te mea ko ia te tangata i whiriwhiria hei hanga tī ahakoa e rua ngā pononga i reira.
I roto i te marena Inia, ko tētahi mea e puta noa mai ana ko te tohutohu. Mai i ō hungawai ki ō mātua ki ngā whaea kēkē, ki ngā matua kēkē me ngā whanaunga, ka tohutohungia koe ki te huarahi tika hei mahi i ngā mea.
Mai i ō hungawai ki ō mātua, tae atu ki ngā whaea kēkē, matua kēkē me ngā whanaunga, ka akona koe ki te huarahi tika ki te mahi i ngā mea.
I neke taku hoa i Kolkata ki Bangalore i muri i tana marena, ā, i noho tahi rāua ko tana tāne. I ia rā, i ia rā, ka waea atu tōna whaea ki a ia ki te pātai he aha tāna e tunu ana. Ka riri te whaea mēnā ka kī atu ia he heihei, he tīhi rānei tāna i tunu ai. sabzi me te roti. Nā te mea i roto i tō rātou kāinga, kāore i taea te whakaaro he iti iho i te rima ngā rihi i runga i te tēpu i te wā kai. He tohunga pukumahi, he kai tunu tupato hoki, ka tīmata taku hoa ki te karo i ngā waea a tōna whaea, nā te mea ka mutu tonu hei tautohetohe mō te kai. Kātahi ka kī atu tana tāne kia tunua e ia ngā rihi mā te waea kaua ki runga i te oumu. Kātahi ka tau te rangimārie.
3. Kāore he mea whaiaro rawa
Mena kua uru koe ki tētahi marena Īnia, tera pea ka pātaihia wawetia mai tētahi pātai whaiaro, engari kāore tetahi e whakaaro he pātai whaiaro.
"Āhea koe ka whānau tamariki?" he pātai ka pātaihia i waenganui i te rūma kī tonu i te tangata, me te kore e whakaarohia kia hoatu e koe te wā, engari ko te whero e tae atu ana ki ō taringa ka nui hei whakautu. He rerekē ngā tāngata kua ako ki te whakahaere i tēnei pātai i runga i ngā huarahi rerekē, engari kāore he tokorua Inia kua marenatia i mawhiti mai i tēnei, ki te kore rātou e hapu i te pō marena. Engari mō rātou ko te pātai e whai ake nei kei te rite tonu, "Āhea koe e whakamahere ana i tētahi tuakana, teina rānei mō tāu tamaiti?"
Ā, ki te mea kei a koe ētahi raruraru momona, ā, kua kōrerotia e koe ki tētahi o te whānau, me tumanako ka horapa haere, ā, ka tae mai ngā mema katoa o te whānau me te nama waea a te tohunga momona. Kia rite ki te whakautu i a rātou me ngā taipitopito katoa mō tō maimoatanga momona.
4. Ka taea e te whānau o te kōtiro te whakatupu i te raruraru nui atu
I mua, e ai ki te tikanga Inia, ina moe te kōtiro, kāore tōna whānau e pokanoa ki ngā mahi a tana sasural . Engari i nāianei, e whakaaro ana ngā mātua o te wahine mātau, he nui ake tana utu i tana tāne, he nui ake tā rātou whai wāhi ki ngā mahi a tō rātou oranga whānau nā te mātauranga o te kōtiro.
Nō reira, e hiahia ana rātou kia noho whakamarie tā rātou tamahine , pērā i a ia i tōna maika . Mai i te kounga o te waiū e wātea ana i roto i te whare, ki te motuka e whakamahia ana e te whānau tae atu ki te moenga e whakamahia ana e te tamahine, he wāhi whai mana tō te whānau o te kōtiro ki ngā mea katoa.
Kāore anō kia whakahuatia te pātai mō te whakapaunga, te haumi me te tohatoha i ana whiwhinga ki tana maika.
He pānui e pā ana: I te wā i nui rawa ai te wawaotanga a tōna whaea mōku
5. Kāore he mutunga o ngā tumanakohanga
I kōrero ahau ki tētahi wahine taitamariki i tētahi atu rā, i moe wahine i te tau kua pahure. Nā te mea kei Delhi tana tāne, ā, he mahi pai tāna i Kolkata, kāore anō ia kia neke ki Delhi. Engari e tika ana kia noho ia me ōna hungawai e noho ana i ngā tāone iti, kia haere i runga i ngā tereina ā-rohe mō te kotahi me te hawhe hāora i ia rā, i ia rā, ā, ina toro atu ia ki tana tāne, ka haere tahi mai ōna hungawai me ētahi whaea kēkē, matua kēkē rānei. I āhua harikoa ia, kāore hoki i āwangawanga ki te whakaritenga, engari i whakaaro ahau, kia pēhea te roa ka taea e ia te whakamanawanui i te pēhanga a tōna whānau Īnia ki tana marena Īnia?
He mutunga kore ngā tumanakohanga, ā, he maha ngā wā kāore i te tino pono, engari ko te nuinga o te wā ka piko te marena Inia ki ngā tumanakohanga a te whānau, ka whakatarewa i ngā hiahia o te marena ki te aata o ngā mahi.
Koia te take e rongo pinepine ai tātou i te hunga e whakarērea ana ā rātou mahi ki tāwāhi, ki tētahi atu tāone rānei o Īnia, ki te hoki ki te kāinga ki te tiaki i ō rātou mātua kua kaumātuatia, e mate ana rānei.
Koia te take kāore e taea e koe te kī atu ki tētahi whanaunga kia kaua e noho ki tō kāinga, ahakoa kua tata mai ngā whakamātautau poari a tāu tamaiti. Kāore e taea e koe te kī atu ki a rātou he pai ake ki a koe te marena rēhita noa iho, ā, he pai ake ki a koe te whakapau i te moni katoa ki tētahi haerenga honi tauhou, ā, kāore e taea e koe te kī atu ki a rātou kāore koe e whakapono ki te whāngai i te tangata i ngā hui shraddh.
Kei roto katoa i te whānau
He mea noa te tuku moni hei whakaora i tētahi matua kēkē i tana pakihi kore angitu, hei whakatutuki i te moemoeā MBA a tētahi whanaunga, hei hoko rānei i taua hei koura mā tētahi whanaunga, kei whakararuraru tōna hungawai wahine i a ia i muri i tana marena. Ko te tikanga o te tuku moni i tēnei wā, kaua e tumanako ka hoki mai te moni. Mena ko te tikanga o tēnā me whakaroa koe i te peita i tō ake whare mō ngā tau e rua, he tika tēnā.
Ā, ina tae ki te whakatau kaupapa, kāore he mea e taea te tupu me te kore e kōrero ki te whānau whānui. Koia te take he maha ngā wā ka noho te marena, te nekehanga mahi, te whakatau i te kura mō te tamaiti, i tōna ara mahi rānei, hei huihuinga tēpu porowhita mā ngā mema o te whānau.
Ā, i ngā rā e haere ana, ka kite koe kua nui ake te wāhi kua riro i te whānau Īniana i roto i tā kōrua marena Īni, kua panaia ōu kaupapa matua me ōu wawata ki muri.
Anei ngā tauhohenga a ngā mātua Inia ki ngā hoa tāne a tā rātou tamāhine
Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
He pai ngā kōrero, engari kāore te āhuatanga i te tino kino mēnā he pai te māramatanga o te tokorua, ā, he mārama te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero a te tāne ki tōna taha whānau (ehara i te mea he 'rangatira' ia engari nā te mea i roto i tō tātou hapori tāne, ko ngā mātua o te tāne te nuinga o te wā ka nui ake te raruraru). Ko te tikanga tēnei me māia te hunga e whakaaro ana ki te marena! Kei te haere tō tātou whakatupuranga i tētahi panonitanga nui, ā, ko te mea i whakaaetia e ō tātou kaumātua, kāore i te pai ki a tātou. Nō reira, kia ata noho, kia mau tonu te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero.
Kia pono tātou. Ehara i te mea ngāwari te tīmata i te oranga marena i Inia. Ina whakaarohia te hanganga o tō tātou oranga whānau, me ngā tumanakohanga e pā ana ki ngā mema hou o te whānau, he mea whakamataku, he mea whakararuraru hoki. Ā, hei wahine taitamariki, ina whakaaroaro ahau, he aha te mataku o ngā rangatahi o ēnei rā ki te tūmanakohanga o te oranga marena, ka kitea e au he pūtake tēnei o ngā huringa hihiri kua pā ki a tātou hei whakatipuranga. I ēnei rā, ko te whānui haere o ngā tūmanakohanga o te mātauranga, te oranga mahi, te wātea mai o ngā pāpāho hou, ngā tirohanga hou ki te takitahi, te hiranga o te wāhi whaiaro nō te tangata ake - kua whai wāhi katoa ēnei ki te tipu haere o te māramatanga o te takitahi me tō tātou hiahia ki te huarahi manapori ki te oranga. He moemoeā tō tātou, he momo oranga pai me ērā atu mea - ā, i waenganui i ēnei mea katoa, ko te tūmanakohanga tāpiri o te whakatutuki i ngā tumanakohanga me ngā tono a tētahi atu whānau he mea whakamataku, he mea whakamataku hoki i te wā tuatahi. Engari, ki te whakapau kaha ngā whānau e rua ki te mārama ki ngā taiohi e rua e anga ana ki te hanga i tētahi oranga hou, me ō rāua ake māramatanga me ō rāua ake hiahia ki te ao, me te mahi tahi ki a rāua, kāti, kāore pea rāua e mawhiti. Ā, me tohatoha hoki e ngā hoa te aroha me te kawenga ki te whānau o tētahi ki tētahi. Me whāngai i a rāua, me āwhina i a rāua kia tipu tahi. Ki taku whakaaro, ka taea e tātou te tumanako i tētahi āpōpō pai ake, ā, kāore te marena e ahua hei tūmomo mōrearea.
He pono rawa tēnei. Ā, i ētahi wā ka kore au e mārama koinei te āhua o te whakahaere a ēnei tāngata tino mohio, he nui te wā hei manaaki i ētahi atu, i ā rātou ake pakihi. Tēnā koa, e ngā tāne me ngā wāhine kua pāngia, kia rite ki a Daisy Shah, me kī atu ki a rātou - ko taku pakihi, ko taku pakihi, ehara i te mea māu.
E tino whakaae ana ahau ki ngā kōrero katoa!
Kāore he mana kōrero mō ngā tāne me ngā wāhine kia whakaaetia rā anō e ō rātou kaumātua. I ētahi wā, me mahi koe i ngā mea kāore koe e pai ki te mahi, ā, me mahi anō hoki. Ā tōna wā, ka puta pea te pouri, ā, ka kore e taea te hono atu i te whānau.
Āe. Kāore au i te mōhio he aha te nui o ngā tumanako??? Kaua e tino tumanako, engari whakaaetia te kōtiro, te tāne rānei, ko ia tonu. Kaua e tino whakararu i a rātou ki ō tumanako mutunga kore. Tēnā koa!