7 Ngā Tohutohu mō ngā Tāne e Mau Ana i waenganui i te Wahine me te Whaea i roto i te Whānau Tahi

Porohia te aroha

Me pēhea te whakahaere i tō wahine me ō mātua? Me pēhea te whakataurite i waenganui i te wahine me te whaea? Ko wai tāu e whiriwhiri ai? Āe, ko te whakautu kāore he tangata. He uaua pea tēnei āhuatanga. He maha ngā wā ka akiakihia koe e te tangata kia tautoko i te hunga kaha, manaaki. he wahine nāna koe i hanga hei tāne i tēnei rā. Kātahi ka kīia pea koe e ētahi he tama māma, ka whakatoi i a koe, ka kī atu he hinengaro tōu ake, ā, kāore e pai te kare ā-roto tuku iho ki te tāne.

Ko te tuatoru o ngā rōpū ka akiaki i a koe kia nui te hinu pēpi māu nā te tūranga e tū nei koe, ko ētahi atu ka tohu i te whanaungatanga. Ko wai te mea nui, ko te whaea, ko te wahine rānei, he maha ngā pātai ki a koe. Kāore he whakautu i te nuinga o te wā. Ko te tangata e noho ana i roto i te whānau kotahi, ka pāngia e ngā taumahatanga kare ā-roto ina puta he pakanga i waenganui i tana wahine me tōna whaea.

He tama manaaki koe, ā, kāore he rā i kore ai koe e pono ki tāu wahine. Nō reira, i tēnei wā e nui ana te taumahatanga, he wāhi noa koe mō te amuamu me te Te whakaputa i ngā kare ā-roto. E tumanakohia ana kia noho koe hei tāne i waenganui i te wahine me te whaea. Ahakoa ngā rerekētanga iti e puta ake ana, i te wā e noho tahi ana ngā wāhine e rua i raro i te tuanui kotahi, ka taea te tipu tere me tō āwhina, me tō kore āwhina rānei. Ehara i te mea ngāwari ki te whakahaere, te kaha o ngā wāhine.

Me pehea te taurite i waenga i te wahine me te whaea

Ripanga o Ihirangi

Me pēhea te whakataurite i waenganui i tō wahine me tō whaea? He aha te uaua o te whakahaere i ngā mātua me te wahine i muri i te marena? Tērā pea kei roto i tō hinengaro ēnei pātai mēnā kei raro rāua i te tuanui kotahi. I mua, i te wā i marenatia ai ngā kōtiro i te tamarikitanga, i ako rātou i ngā uara me ngā tikanga o te whānau i marenatia ai rātou, i raro i te mātakitaki pakari a hungawai wahine uaua.

Engari i nāianei, kua mātau ngā wāhine, kua whai mahi, ā, kua mauria mai e rātou ō rātou ake uara ki tō rātou kāinga hou. Nō reira, kāore e taea te karo i ngā taupatupatu i waenganui i te hunaonga wahine me te hungawai wahine. Mena kei te noho tahi kōrua ko tō hoa rangatira, ā, e ngana ana koe ki te whakatere i tēnei rohe taupatupatu, anei ētahi tohutohu hei whakahaere i ngā taupatupatu i waenganui i te wahine me te whaea.

1. Kia mohio he tino tangata ki te tokorua

"Kāore taku whaea me taku wahine e noho tahi" me "Me pēhea taku whakaoti rapanga i waenganui i te wahine me te whaea" - ki te mea kei te raru tonu tō hinengaro i ēnei whakaaro, tukua mātou kia āwhina i a koe. Nā tō whaea koe i atawhai, engari ko tō Kua neke mai taku wahine ki te hanga i tētahi oranga mōu. He tika ngā tirohanga a ngā wāhine tokorua.

Ka rerekē te ao i muri i te marena. Ka huri ngā kaupapa matua. He wahine tāu ināianei. Tērā pea ka hiahia koe ki te tautoko i a ia mō ngā mea katoa, engari kia mārama he huringa nui tēnei mō tō whaea. Kua neke tō wahine ki tētahi kāinga hou, kāore ia e mōhio ki tētahi. Kei te kite tō whaea i ngā huringa i roto i tōna ake kāinga kua hanga e ia mō ngā tekau tau. Kei te kaha rawa ngā kare ā-roto o rāua tokorua.

Ehara i te mea ko te whiriwhiri i waenga i te wahine me te whaea. Ehara hoki i te mea ko te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero. Ko te aroha ki ngā wāhine e rua, he wāhanga nui o tō kōrua oranga. He mea whaiaro tēnei mā rāua tokorua. Tērā pea he mea whakarihariha ki a koe te aro atu ki te raruraru i ngā wā katoa, engari ko te whakanoho i a koe ki roto i ō rāua hu me te whakamarara i te āhuatanga te mea me mahi e koe.

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2. Te whakamahere i mua i te marena

Kei te whakaaro tō wahine ki te neke ki te noho tahi me tō whānau i muri i tana marena ki a koe. E mōhio ana koe kāore pea tō wahine me tō whānau e noho tahi. Na, hanga hononga ki tō hoa rangatira i mua i te marena. Kia mōhio koe ki tō hoa wahine e tata ana ki te marena, kia kite ai koe me pēhea ia e hono ai ki tō whānau. I mua noa atu i te rā nui, tīmatahia te whakauru i tō hoa wahine e tata ana ki te marena ki ngā take o te whare. Whakauruhia hoki tō whaea ki roto. He mea nui kia mōhio ngā wāhine tokorua e aroha ana koe ki a rāua.

Ko te āwangawanga ka pā ki tō whaea tuku iho ko te whakaaro ka ngaro koe i tētahi atu wahine, ā, kāore e mau i taua tūranga nui i roto i tō ao. Ki te mea he whakaaro koretake tēnei, nā te mea ko koe anō tō ake tangata, ā, ka taea e koe te whai i ngā tāngata nui atu i te kotahi i roto i tō ao, me ngāwari koe ki te whakauru i tō whaea ki tēnei whakaritenga. Me whakamōhio atu ki a ia he aha tāna e whakaaro ana he mea nui ki a koe. Tukua ngā wāhine kia noho ko rātou anake. Tukua rātou kia mōhio tetahi ki tetahi. Tukua rātou kia whakatau i ngā mea mā rātou anō. Ki te taea e rātou te whakawhirinaki tetahi ki tetahi, ka māmā ake tō oranga. Ka taea e koe te whakataurite i waenga i tō wahine me tō whaea.

3. Whakatauhia nga pakanga tunu kai

He wāhi pakanga nui te kīhini. Ā, he maha ngā pātai ka pātaihia ko wai te mea nui ake i te kīhini, ko te whaea, ko te wahine rānei? He maha ngā tāne e whiriwhiri ana i waenga i tā rātou wahine me tā rātou whaea ina tae mai ki te kai. "Ko wai te mea tunu kai pai ake?" – tera pea ka ara ake tēnei pātai i tētahi wā. Ko te noho i roto i tētahi whānau tahi matatika he maha ngā wā ka noho ngā wāhine ki te kīhini, ā, ka whakahīhī rātou ki tō rātou pai, ki ō rātou pūkenga tunu kai, me te whakahaere. Tērā pea he mahi tā tō wahine, ā, ka tunu kai tonu ia mō te whānau i ia pō tuarua.

Mena he pai ki tō hoa wahine, ki tō whaea rānei te tunu kai, ko koe rānei tētahi o aua ngā tāne me ngā wāhine e pai ana ki te tunu kai mā te mahi tahi, kāore e tūpono ka puta he raruraru. Ka taea te whakatau i ngā tautohe i roto i te kīhini mēnā ka whai wāhi noa koe ki ngā mahi o te kīhini i ia rā, i ia rā. Ka taea te whakamarie i ngā amuamu katoa a tō whaea i taua wā tonu. Mēnā he wahine tuku iho tō whaea, ā, e whakaaro ana ia me aro nui te wahine ki tōna whānau i mua i tana mahi, tera pea ka whakapae ia i tō wahine mō te kore e tino āwhina. Nō reira, kei a koe te kawenga ki te whakaatu i tō taha matatau mā te mahi i tāu wāhanga o ngā mahi. Mā tēnei, ka oti te mahi a te katoa, ā, ka hoki mai te rangimārie.

4. Kaua e akiaki i te amuamu

He mea nui tō rangimārie i konei. Ko tētahi ko tō whaea. Ko tētahi ko tō wahine. Ki te amuamu tētahi, kia mahara ehara i te mea māu te whakatika i ngā mea katoa. Ki te mea tō wahine, "Kei te tīmata tonu tō whaea ki te whawhai", kaua e kī, "Ka kōrero ahau ki a ia". Ahakoa e arohaina ana rāua e koe, he pakeke rāua. Mā te akiaki i tētahi ki te amuamu mō tētahi ka ngaro tō manawanui me tō rangimārie o te hinengaro.

Whakaarohia te whakarongo ki ngā kupu pēnei i te "Ko tō whaea tēnei, ko tēnei" me te "I pēnei, i pēnei hoki tāu wahine." Whakarongo ki tā rātou whakapuakitanga, engari kaua e waiho hei tikanga. Tērā pea ka whakapāha koe ki a koe anō mēnā kei te pāngia koe e te ngaru o ngā amuamu. He pai ki te waiho mā rāua e whakatau te raruraru i waenganui i a rāua anō. Kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakahaere i ngā tautohe i waenganui i tō wahine me tō whaea i ngā wā katoa. He pakeke rāua, ā, me whakatau e rāua anake ngā mea. Whakauru mai mēnā kua takahi pono tetahi i ngā rohe.

te taurite i waenga i te wahine me te whaea

5. Kaua e riri tetahi i mua i tetahi

"Me pēhea taku whakahaere i taku wahine me aku mātua?" me "Kāore taku whaea me taku wahine e noho tahi. Me aha ahau?" – e tino mōhio ana mātou kua puta ake ēnei pātai ki roto i tō hinengaro i tētahi wā. Āe, he huarahi anō hei whakahaere i ngā mātua me te wahine i muri i te marena. Ki te kaha koe ki te patu i tētahi i mua i tētahi, ka akiakihia rātou kia pērā anō hoki. Ina noho koe i waenganui i te toka me te wāhi mārō, kāore e taea e koe te riri ki tētahi o rātou. Ka whakaatahia e tāu e kōrero ai, e te āhua o tāu whakapuakitanga, ā, ka pā ki tā rātou e kōrero ai, e mahi ai hoki i te wā kāore koe i reira.

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6. Whakaritea he wā kounga me tō whaea

Mena kei te whakahaere tonu tō whaea i ngā mea katoa i muri i te marena, ā, kāore ia e pai ki te tuku i a koe, he mea e whakapataritari ana i tō wahine, nā te mea kua tīmata ia ki te whakaaro kua whakaititia ia e koe. Whakamāmāhia ia ki roto i te āhuatanga mā te Te whakarite wā ki a ia. He whakaaro pai te kawe i a ia ki waho mō te tina. Engari kaua e amuamu mō tō wahine ina haere koe ki waho. Hei whakaatu i te aroha o tō whaea ki a ia, ā, kāore he mea i rerekē. Mā ēnei mahi iti nei ka whakamarie i a ia, ā, ka taea e koe te taurite i waenganui i te wahine me te whaea.

7. He atarangi pai te noho pūmau

Ina nui te tautohetohe, te hamama, me te hamama, kaua e ngana ki te whakamarie i te katoa, engari me kī atu kia rite ki ngā pakeke, kia rite ki tā rātou mahi, kia whakatau i ngā mea mā rātou anō. Me tono atu ki a rātou kia kōrero whakaute tetahi ki tetahi, kia mārama hoki ki a rātou kāore e taea e koe te noho tonu ki reira hei takawaenga i waenganui i ngā mea e rua. Kāore e taea e koe te noho hei tāne i waenganui i te wahine me te whaea i ngā wā katoa.

Ko te tumanako kua whai whakaaro koe i nāianei mō me pēhea te whakaoti rapanga i waenga i te wahine me te whaea, me pēhea hoki te whakahaere i ngā mātua me te wahine i muri i te marena. Āe, ehara i te mea ngāwari, engari he mea ka taea. He whanaungatanga uaua hei whakahaere. Kāore tō whanaungatanga ki tō wahine e whakawehi i te whanaungatanga kei a koe me tō whaea, ā, he mea tēnei ka mārama rātou i te mutunga mā tō manawanui me tō marino. Engari he uaua te whakawhiti i runga i ngā kare ā-roto me te āhua o te tinana. Engari, kaua e manukanuka. Ki te whai koe i ngā tohutohu kua hoatu i runga ake nei, ka taea e koe te te taurite i waenga i te wahine me te whaeaKo te tumanako ka ea wawe tō raruraru whiriwhiri i waenga i te wahine me te whaea.!

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