Kotahi te Takahanga i Nui hei Whakangaro i tōku Whakapono ki a Au
Ripanga o Ihirangi
He wahine kaha ahau e tautoko ana i te mana o te wahine, he wahine mahi kaha, motuhake, engari i taua rā, ehara i te mea ko tōku tinana me tōku tara anake i tukinotia, engari ko tōku whakapono ki ahau anō hoki.
E rima marama ki muri i wehe ai māua ko taku hoa tāne. He rite tonu te āhua, engari he mamae te whakaae kāore ia i te whai wāhi ki tōku ao. I pouri ahau engari i hiahia ahau kia tere te neke atu i te kare o te "wehenga".
I tētahi rā, i muri i taku noho roa i te tēpu tari mō ngā hāora "kore mahi", ka kite ahau i aku hoa mahi wahine tokorua e pukumahi ana ki te pana i ō rātou kanohi ki matau, ki maui me te kata me te whero o ō rātou kanohi mō ngā hāora maha.
"E hoa, kei te whakamahi kōrua i a Tinder?" ka pātai atu ahau.
"Āe, he huarahi pai tēnei ki te tūtaki ki ngā tāne, ā, ka kaha ake hoki tō pūkenga whakaipoipo," te whakahoki a tētahi o ngā kōtiro.
"Kua whakaritea he rā mō te moe. He ātaahua tōna āhua, he puku puku ōna, ā, he rite tonu ki te tangata e hiahia ana ki te whare takaro tinana. Whakaarohia tōna kaha me tōna kaha i runga i te moenga," te whakatapoko a tētahi atu.
Pānui e pā ana: Te whai huatanga o Tinder mō aku hoa
I hiahia ahau ki te mōhio ki ngā taupānga whakaipoipo ipurangi
Me te ataata whakama, ka hoki atu ahau ki te mata o taku pona. I hiahia ahau ki te mōhio; me kite noa ahau he aha te mea nui. He mea whakamere te tūtaki ki ngā tāne mariko , me te mea ka taea e au te whakahaere i te āhuatanga: ko wai taku e pai ai, ko wai kāore au e pai ai, āhea te wā me tūtaki ai, āhea te wā kāore. Ahakoa i whakaaro ahau he moumou taima noa iho te taupānga pērā i te " Rakhi ka Swayamwar ," i kukume tonu ahau ki te tango. I muri i te whakarite i taku kōtaha me taku koiora, ka noho ahau ki raro ka tīmata te swipe—swipe maui, swipe matau. Koinā anake. Kāore au i mārama ki te kaupapa o te taupānga, engari i rite ki te kēmu. Ka swipe ahau i roto i te taxi, i roto i ngā wharekai, ā, i te pō roa i mua i te moe. Ka tīmata ahau ki te kōrero ki aku hoa; 90 ōrau o rātou he hoha, he whakamataku rānei.
Kotahi anake te tangata i kōrero ahau ki a ia, he tino pai te āhua. He pakihi hou tana, he pai; he pahau tōna (āe! Nāku te ngoikore), ā, he āhua pai tōna āhua. Ko Kunal tōna ingoa. I whakawhitiwhiti nama māua, ā, he nui ā māua kōrero i te rā tuatahi . I hiahia ia ki te tūtaki, engari he ture tāku: 'Kaua e haere ki te whakatā i mua i te kōrero mō te wiki kotahi'. He tino reka ia, ā, i tatari ia mō te wiki kotahi. I tino pai te noho tahi o māua. I mōhio ahau kāore māua i te rite. He rerekē ō māua āhua, ā māua whiringa, ā māua whakapono mahi – he maha ngā tohu kino i tika kia tatauhia e au, engari kāore au i pena, ā, i whakaae ahau ki te tūtaki ki a Kunal.
Te āhua nei kāore i nui ō māua āhuatanga ōrite
He Rātapu te ahiahi, ā, i haere ahau ki te whakatau i a ia i tētahi wharekai iti, ātaahua, i tētahi tiriti pukumahi.
"He mea whakamiharo te āhua o tō āhua ina kōrero te tangata. Ka meinga te tangata kia rongo kei te whakarongo koe," tana kī.
I whero paku ahau, “Āe! He tangata whakarongo pai ahau.” He pai, ā, i te mutunga, ka awhi māua.
"I tino pai ki ahau te tūtaki ki a koe," tana karere kuputuhi i a au e hoki ana ki te kāinga.
"Au hoki," taku whakahoki.
"He pono? Kāore i rite ki tērā," ko tāna whakautu.
"Kāore au i te nui o te kōrero, he kaiwhakarongo ake ahau. Ā, i mataku noa iho ahau," taku karere whakahoki.
"E mārama ana ahau," tana kī.
I te wiki i muri mai, ka ngaro ia. He tohu tuatahi. I ia wā ka tuku karere atu ahau ki a ia, i tae mai ia me te kī taurangi noa, "Āe! I pukumahi ahau, he hui āku."
I mutu taku tuku karere kuputuhi ki a ia. E toru ngā rā i muri mai, ka tīmata te hoki mai o ana karere kuputuhi.
"E hoa, me tūtaki tāua i te ahiahi," tana karere kuputuhi.
"Āe," (I wātea ahau i taua ahiahi, ā, i whakaaro ahau, 'Me hoatu he wā anō ki a ia. Kei te nui rawa pea aku whakaaro.')
I tukuna mai e ia te wāhi o tōna whare noho me te nama whare. He haki whero tuarua.
"Āe, ō hoa noho tata… Ki taku whakaaro ehara i te mea pai te hui ki tō whare," ka tukuna atu e au he karere kuputuhi ki a ia.
"Kāore ōku hoa noho i runga i taku papa," tana kī. "He makariri, haere mai," tāna tāpiri.
I tono ahau i tētahi tekesi, ā, ka tae atu ki tōna whare noho. I roto i te ararewa, i mataku ahau, me te pātai tonu, 'He aha ahau i pēnei ai, he aha ahau i haere ai ki te whare o tēnei tangata?', engari i kaha ake te hiahia ki te mōhio i tōku reo ngoikore.
I tīmata ia ki te whakapakari tinana
I puta atu ahau i te ararewa, ā, ka kite ahau i a ia e tū ana i waho o tōna whare. I menemene ahau, ā, ka awhi mai ia i ahau. I ngana ia ki te whakatata mai ki ahau, e pā ana ki tōku kaki, e awhi mai ana i ahau i ngā wā katoa , kātahi ka arahina tētahi o ā māua awhi ki te kihi. I hiahia ahau ki te kihi i a ia; i mōhio ahau ka puta he kihi. Engari ko taku anake i hiahia ai ko te kihi i a ia.
I a ia e kihi ana i ahau, e mirimiri ana ia i tōku hope, i ōku huha o roto, me tōku papa. I ngana ahau ki te hopu i ōna ringa, engari i tino tohe ia.
"Kei te hiahia koe ki te awhi?" i pātai ia.
"Āe." (Nā te mea i tino hiahia ahau ki te awhi. Awhi noa.) Engari ka tīmata ia ki te kihi i ahau, kaha.
I nekehia ake taku remu, ka pā ki ōku ū. I whakatuwherahia e ia tōna hāte, ā, i hiahia kia kihi ahau i tōna uma.
"Ki taku whakaaro me mutu tātau. Me ata haere," ka mea atu ahau, "Me haere pea au." Engari kāore i angitu.
I ngoikore rawa ahau ki te ātete i a ia. Ko taku hiahia anake kia mutu.
"Kāore tāua e moe tāne, whakapono mai," ā, ko te wā tonu tēnā i wetewete ai ia i ōna tarau, ā, i hiahia kia puritia e au āna mea. I titiro mai ia ki ahau, ā, ka mea mai, "Tena koa."
"Kaua tāua e moe tāne," taku kīnga anō.
"Tena koa," ka mea ia, ā, ka whakakakahu i te ure ki tana mea.
I tōna otinga, ka whakakakahu ahau, ka haere. I pēhia ahau e te ngoikore, e te tinihanga.
Ko te taatai me te whakaae; kei roto i te wāhi hina ngā mea e rua. Ahakoa i haere ahau ki tōna whare noho me te hiahia ki te kihi i a ia, ehara i te mea kua rite ahau ki te taatai ki a ia. Aue, me i mōhio ia ki tēnā.
Ko te Tūkino te He o te Kaitūkino
He mea uaua te aro atu ki te tukino, ahakoa he moepuku, he kōrero, he tinana, he kare ā-roto rānei. He rerekētanga kei roto i te hinengaro; e hiahia ana tetahi taha ki te haere ki waho ki te kōrero ki tētahi, ki te whakapuaki i ngā mea i tupu, me te whakarongo ki ētahi kupu tautoko. Ko tetahi taha e ārai ana i a koe. E kī ana ki a koe ka whakahengia koe e te tangata, ka kī te tangata he kuware rawa koe ki te kore e mārama, ka taea e koe te haere atu mēnā e hiahia ana koe. Engari kāore e pērā te āhua. Ko te tukino, ahakoa he roa, he roa, he wā takitahi rānei, he mahi nā te kaiwhakatoi. EHARA i te kī i "tono" te patunga, i "hiahia rānei" rānei. I te nuinga o te wā, ko te urupare tuatahi a te patunga ko te hara. Nō reira, kei te whakahoki anō ahau i ahau anō: EHARA i tō he.
Pānui e pā ana: I kōrero mai ia kua wehe rāua ko tana hoa o mua
Nā ngā pae " Teití " pērā i a Tinder, kua māmā ake te whakahaere a te tangata i te hunga ngāwari ki te tinihanga. Ko ngā kōtiro me ngā tama e rapu ana i ngā hoa, ka akiakihia kia tīmata i tētahi "whanaungatanga noa iho," he tohu tēnei mō te kī, "kia whai wāhi tinana noa iho tāua." Mā ēnei papaaho ka māmā ake te tūtaki a te tangata ki ētahi atu, inā koa i ngā wā o te pouri pērā i muri tata mai i te mutunga o tētahi whanaungatanga , i te wā e "taea ai" te ngoikore o te tangata.
Me kōrero ā-waha te whakaae
He ariā tino hē te mārama ki te ariā whakaae. E ai ki te hoariri matua a Bryce Walker o te raupapa tautohenga "13 Reasons Why", "nāna i hiahia, nāna i hanga ngā kanohi." Koinei te āhua o te whakaae. Kei te noho tātou i tētahi whenua kāore e kiia he hara te tāwharau i roto i te marena . E whakaaro ana te tangata ko ngā tohu kore-waha e mārama ana rātou he huarahi ki te tuku whakaae. Ahakoa te ahua wairangi, koinei te āhua o te whakaae.
Ko te haere ki te whare noho o tētahi, ehara i te whakaae. Ko te akiaki i a koe ki tētahi e kī ana "kia wheako rātou i te ahuareka" ehara i te whakaae. Ki te kore te tangata kē e kī mai ki a koe, "me mahi tāua," ehara i te whakaae. Ko te wheako moepuku he mea mō te tokorua, ehara i te kotahi. Ko te whakaute i ngā tinana e rua, ehara i te kotahi. Ko te moepuku he mea whiwhi me te hoatu i te ahuareka, ehara i te taha kotahi. Ko te hiahia o te tokorua ki te tūhura i ngā tinana o tētahi ki tētahi.
Kia mārama ehara i te mea nāu te he
Mō te hunga katoa kua pāngia e tētahi momo tukino, ka tino taunaki atu ahau kia toro atu koutou ki tētahi kaiwhakaora hinengaro, kia tukatuka i ngā kare ā-roto i pā ki a koutou i taua wā. E mihi ana ahau ki te haere mai o te iwi ki konei, ki te whakamahi i tēnei tūāpapa hei whakaputa i ō rātou kare ā-roto. Kāore he hē o te kī kāo.
Ki te pai tētahi ki a koe, ka tatari rātou mō tō whakaae. Ki te kore, ehara rātou i te tangata e hiahiatia ana e koe i roto i ōu oranga. Haere atu, kaua e wehi ki te kī kāo. Haere atu mēnā ka mea mai tō puku kia pērā koe. Mā taua reo iti i roto koe e kī tonu ki a koe ngā mea tika hei mahi. Me kī atu KATI mēnā i hiahia koe ki te tīmata engari kāore koe i te pai ki waenganui. Ko tō tinana tēnei, ka taea e koe te whakakore i tō whakaae i ngā wā katoa kāore koe i te pai. Kaua e wehi kei whara ngā kare ā-roto o tētahi atu mēnā ka kī kāo koe. Nā te mea, ki te pai, ehara i te mea koinā ngā kare ā-roto e hiahia ana koe kia noho tonu. Ka akiaki ahau i te hunga katoa e pānui ana i tēnei kia mārama, kia whakanui hoki i te tikanga o te whakaae pono.
Thoughts Final
Hei whakamutunga, i whakaatuhia e taku haerenga te hiranga o te whakaae ā-waha mārama i roto i ngā āhuatanga piripono katoa. Kaua rawa te toro atu ki te whare o tētahi, te kihi rānei, e whakamāramatia he hiahia ki te moepuku. Ehara te tukino i te he o te patunga, ā, he mea nui kia mōhio me te whakaute i ngā rohe whaiaro. Whakawhirinaki ki ō kare ā-roto, kōrero tuwhera, me te whakatairanga i tō haumaru me te whakaute i a koe anō. Ko te whakaae pono he mea whakawhitiwhiti, he hihiri, he mea whakapuaki mārama. Kia mahara, he pai tonu te kī kāo me te wehe atu i tētahi āhuatanga e whakararuraru ana i a koe. Ko tō oranga te mea nui, ā, e tika ana kia noho haumaru, kia whakautehia hoki te katoa i roto i ō rātou whanaungatanga.
E toru tau a Mallika Pathak e mahi ana hei tohunga hinengaro i tētahi Whare Hauora Hinengaro. He kaiako manuhiri hoki ia i Te Whare Wānanga o Maharaja Sayajirao mō te Whakaora Hauora me te Whakaora Hinengaro. He tohunga ia ki te whakaora i te marena tae atu ki te tukino; te aro atu ki ngā hoa e pāngia ana e ngā mate hinengaro kino.
Te Tūranga o te Whakaaetanga: Kāore e Taea te Whakamārama i tētahi Atu Mea?
Te Whakatere i ngā Uauatanga o te Whakaaetanga i roto i ngā Hononga Hou
Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
Kāre au i te mōhio he aha ētahi tāngata kāore e mārama ki te tikanga o te whakaae. Ina kī mai te kōtiro kia mutu, me mutu te tāne. Kāre au i te mārama. Ā, e te kōtiro, kaua e ngoikore, kaua hoki e whakaaro he hapa nāu. Ko mātou ngā kōtiro, ko te tikanga, he hapa nā mātou i haere ai ki tōna whare. Engari kāo, ehara i te he nā mātou i ngā wā katoa. Me whakanui ake tō mātou reo!