He maha ngā wā ka akiakihia tātou e te ao ki te whakatau i ngā whakataunga e whakamātautau ana i ō tātou uara, i ō tātou whanaungatanga, me te maia. E whakaata ana tēnei pūrākau i ngā wero o te whakataurite i te aroha whānau, ngā tumanakohanga mō te marena, me ngā patunga tapu whaiaro. E whakamārama ana i te raruraru kare ā-roto o tētahi tangata e haehaetia ana i waenganui i tōna whaea, i tana wahine, me ōna wehi o roto, ā, i te mutunga ka arahina atu ki tētahi ara e kī ana i te pouri, te tinihanga, me te hara kāore anō kia whakatauhia.
Te Taumaha o ngā Kōwhiringa: He Kōrero mō te Aroha, te Tukunga, me te Hara
Ripanga o Ihirangi
(E ai ki tā Joie Bose)
Koinei te whakatau tino uaua rawa atu i mahia e au i te wā i kī mai ai taku wahine kia neke māua ki tētahi atu whare. He rite tonu ā rāua tautohetohe o ia rā ki ērā i tautohetohe ai taku whaea ki taku kuia, ki tōna hungawai wahine. I tohe tonu taku wahine kia neke ia, nā te mea kua hoha ia ki te pātai a taku whaea mō te wā ka hapu ai ia.
Kāore anō kia noho tawhiti atu ahau i tōku whaea i mua, ā, kāore au i te mōhio me pēhea tana tauhohe mēnā ka kōrerotia e au. I pau tōna oranga katoa ki te aroha ki ahau, ā, i whakarērea e ia tētahi mahi tino whai hua i te tīmatanga o taku whiwhi māka iti i te kura. I te mutunga ka eke ahau ki te taumata teitei. Heoi anō, kāore au i hiahia ki te whakarē i tōku whaea, ki te noho tawhiti atu i a ia. Ko tōku whakaaro kia kaua e haere. Engari i kohikohi ahau i te maia ki te kōrero i te wehi kei kiia ahau he tama a te Māmā, ā, i te mutunga ka neke ahau ki tētahi atu whare i muri i ngā tau e ono o taku marena.
He pānui e pā ana: I whiriwhiria e ia ōna mātua i ahau, ā, kāore au e whakapae i a ia
Kāore he take ki te kī, i tino pouri tōku whaea. "Kua uru ia ki te wairua kino," tana kī. Koinei te mea whakamutunga i tumanakohia e ia mai i ahau, inā koa ko ia te tangata nāna i whiriwhiri taku wahine. He marena whakarite tāku, ā, i hiahia ia kia kaua te tangata e moe i ahau e mahi, kia kaua hoki e noho motuhake. I whakaae taku wahine me tōna whānau ki tēnā. Nō reira, i taku hiahia ki te noho ki tētahi atu wāhi, i whakaaro ia nāku te whakatau. Kāore ia i whakapae i tana hunaonga , ahakoa kotahi. I noho puku ahau, kāore hoki i whakamārama i a ia.
Kāore ia i haere mai ki tōku whare hou, ā, kāore ia i kōrero mai ki ahau mō te tau kotahi.
I te tau kua hipa, i te tekau o ngā tau o tō māua whānautanga, i kōrero mai taku wahine kei te hapu ia. He torutoru noa ngā meneti i roa ai tōku harikoa, i tana whakakitenga mai he tāne kē te matua o te pēpi. Ina hoki, ko ia te kaiwhakatairanga i whakatairanga i tō māua whare hou. He moe tāne kei muri i ahau. Kāore au i te mōhio he aha te momo moe tāne, nā te mea i mārama tana whakaaro kia kaua e whakarere. I tino ohorere ahau ki te pātai atu ki a ia. I tohu anō hoki ia ko au pea te tangata ngoikore, nā te mea kāore ia i whānau he pēpi mō ngā tau tekau.
I ohorere ahau. He aha tāna i hiahia ai i ahau? Ki taku mahara, i whakatahe ia i tētahi wā, i te tau i mārena ai māua. I hiahia ia ki te pārekareka ki te oranga marena, e ai ki tāna. Engari kāore ahau i kōrero mōna, nā te mea i mataku ahau. I whiua mai e ia he poma ki ahau. Me pēhea rā mēnā kei te whai hononga ia i taua wā? Kei te whakamāoritia ahau mō ngā tau tekau? He aha tā te tangata e kī ai? He kuware ahau? He mana tōna ki runga i ahau, he mana tauhou kāore e taea e au te whawhai atu.
Kua wehe atu ahau i Īnia, ā, kua mahi ki tāwāhi. He tamāhine tā taku wahine e noho ana i tō mātou whare. Kāore anō kia kite ahau i tōna mata.
I mate tōku whaea i te marama kua taha ake nei i te mate manawa, ā, kāore au i hoki ki te tahu i a ia. Kua tīmata ia ki te whakaaro kua uruhia ahau e te wairua mō tēnei whanonga, mō te whakarērea i a ia i te tuatahi, kātahi ko tōku whānau. E ai ki taku wahine i teka ia mō te pēpi a tētahi atu hei whakamātautau i ahau. Kāore au i te mōhio he aha ahau i kore ai e haere ki te whakamātautau DNA. Tērā pea ka haere ahau i tētahi rā, ā, ina tae ahau ki reira, he aha taku e kī atu ai ki te kōtiro iti? Kāore au i tū atu ki ngā kaha maha i te wā i tika ai kia pērā ahau. Ki te rongo te iwi i taku kōrero, ka mea rātou he mataku ahau, ā, koinā te mea e wehi ana ahau. Ā, e whakaae ana ahau kei te pērā ahau, nā te mea kāore au i pātai ki taua wahine. Nā te mea i mawhiti tonu ahau. Kāore au i moe tāne. He nui rawa tōku wehi ki ngā wāhine, ki ngā tāne hoki.
Pānui e pā ana: I whakakahoretia e te kaupapa wahine te tika o te moe tahi me ngā hoa maha
Kāore au i te mōhio he aha te mea hei whakapono, ā, ko wai hei whakapono. I te haere o te wā, ka mutu taku aro. Ka tukuna e au he moni i ia marama. Ka īmēra mai taku wahine i ngā whakaahua o tana tamāhine. E kī ana ia ki te katoa i hiahia ahau ki tētahi tama, ā, e pouri ana ia mō te tamaiti wahine. Engari kāore au i te hara. Kāore hoki au i te uruhia e te wairua kino. Ko te mea anake kei roto i ahau ko te hara mō te whati i te ngākau o tōku whaea. Āe, me i kaha ahau ki te kore e wehe atu i tōna whare. Ko ia anake te mea e ngaro ana i ahau i ēnei rā.
I tuhituhi a Debashish Majumdar mō te whanaungatanga i waenganui i tōna whaea me tana wahine, engari he rerekē te putanga.
FAQs
1. He aha te take e tono ai te hoa rangatira ki tana hoa rangatira kia whakarērea tōna mātua?
He maha ngā wā ka puta mai tēnei i ngā pakanga kāore anō kia whakatauhia, i ngā amuamu o mua, i te whakaaro rānei kei te pokanoa te mātua ki te whanaungatanga o te tokorua. Ko te mārama ki te pūtake o te raruraru te mea nui hei whakatika.
2. He mea noa rānei te puta o ēnei momo pakanga i roto i te marena?
Ae, he wero noa te rapu i te taurite i waenga i te hoa rangatira me te whānau i roto i te maha o ngā whanaungatanga, inā koa i roto i ngā ahurea he kaha ngā hononga whānau.
3. Me pēhea taku aro atu ki ngā āwangawanga a taku wahine me te kore e whakarērea taku whaea?
He mea nui te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero tuwhera. Ngāna kia mārama ki te tirohanga a tō hoa wahine, whakamāramahia tō hononga kare ā-roto ki tō whaea, ā, rapua he whakaaetanga e whakaute ana i ngā whanaungatanga e rua.
Thoughts Final
Ka uaua, ka nui hoki te kare ā-roto o te whānau, inā koa ka mau i waenganui i ngā mahi a te tāne me te tama. Ahakoa he maha ngā wā e hiahiatia ana kia whakaritea te hoa rangatira ki te kaupapa matua mō te marena, ka waiho pea e te momotu i ngā hononga ki te mātua he whara hohonu, he kare ā-roto kāore anō kia whakatauhia. He mea nui kia mōhio ko ēnei pakanga ka puta mai i ngā take hohonu ake—he kore kōrero, he kore e tutuki ngā tumanakohanga, he awe ahurea rānei. Ka taea e te rongoā ngaio te āwhina i a koe ki te wetewete i ēnei kare ā-roto, te hanga anō i ngā whanaungatanga, me te kimi i tētahi ara e whakahonore ana i tō marena me ō hononga whānau.
He aha te uaua o te marena? Ngā take me ngā huarahi hei whai hua
Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.
Kei a koe te tū pakari mō tāu e whakapono nei. Kia mahara, e Jo Dhar Gaya, vo mar gaya – te kōrero a Sholey. He tangata kino koe? Kāore i taea e koe te tautoko i ngā tika whakamutunga o tō whaea! He aha te momo mamae kua pā ki a ia? Tēnā, whakamahia ō roro, kia whakaorangia koe e te Atua!
Me tū tonu koe mōu ake, kaua hoki e ngāwari te whakatenatena e tetahi. Me mahi i tāu e pai ai, kaua i tā ētahi atu e hiahia ana kia mahia e koe. He uaua te whakamanawareka i te katoa, nō reira me mahi i tāu e whakaaro ai he tika.
Ko te mea kotahi me huri e koe i roto i tō ao ko te whakawhanake i te ngākau toa mō ngā mea katoa me ngā mea katoa e mahia ana e koe i te ao, ā, kati te kī "e wehi ana ahau ki..." Me whakapono tonu kāore koe e wehi i tetahi mea o te ao, ā, ka taea e koe te whakatau i āu ake whakatau. Kia whakamahia e koe tēnei rautaki ka kitea e koe te māia ki te ao. Kia ora e hoa.