12 Ngā Tohu Kei te Whakamahia Koe e Ia Hei Hoa Wahine Tohu

E hiahia ana tātou katoa ki te whāngai i ō tātou whakapehapeha, kia pai ake ai te whakaaro mō tātou anō. Tērā pea ka hokohoko, ka tae rānei ngā wāhine i ō rātou makawe hei whiwhi i taua 'āhua harikoa'. Waihoki, me whai mea anō hoki ngā tāne hei whāngai i ō rātou whakapehapeha. Ahakoa ko ētahi tāne e hokohoko ana i ngā hangarau me ngā taputapu papai pērā i ngā wati, ko ētahi e pai ana ki te kukume i te aro i ētahi atu huarahi. Ā, he aha te huarahi pai ake hei whakanui ake i te whakaaro o te tangata ki a ia anō i te whakaatu i tētahi hoa wahine ataahua, ātaahua?

Nō reira, ahakoa e aro nui ana ia ki a koe, e hoatu ana hoki i ngā koha, kaua e whakaaro he aroha ia ki a koe – he mea katoa tēnei mōna. He tino mamae te mōhio he hoa wahine noa iho koe mā tētahi kua arohaina e koe. Ko te take anake e noho tahi ai koe me tō hoa tāne ko tō ataahua, ā, me mōhio koe mēnā kei te harikoa koe kia whakaaturia haeretia koe pērā i tētahi taonga nui.

Ko te take anake e pupuri tonu ai tō hoa i a koe kia whakamahia ai koe hei whakanui i tō whakapehapeha. Kei te harikoa koe ki a ia e whakaatu ana i a koe hei taonga nui?

He aha te hoa wahine tohu?

Ko te "trophy girlfriend" te ingoa e hoatu ana ki tētahi kōtiro tino ataahua, taitamariki, tino ātaahua, ā, he tino ataahua, e kiia ana ia he taonga nui. Koinei ngā kōtiro e kiia ana he tohu mana e ā rātou hoa tāne , he maha ngā wā he pakeke ake, he koretake hoki, engari he whai rawa.

Ko te nuinga o rātou he hoa wahine nō ngā kaumātua whai rawa, angitu hoki, ā, he tohu tēnei mō te tūranga pāpori o te tangata. Ko te nuinga o ngā tāne e hiahia ana ki tētahi hoa wahine toa hei whakaatu ki te ao i tōna angitu i te ao. Ka whakaatu hoki ngā tāne i ā rātou hoa wahine toa ki ō rātou hoa, hei whakanui ake i tō rātou whakapehapeha.

He aha te tikanga ina karangahia koe e tetahi he tohu rangatira? 

Ko tōna tikanga, kei te ngana tonu rātou ki te whakapae kei te whakamahia koe e tō hoa tāne kia arohia ai koe. Tērā pea kei te whakamahia koe e ia hei whakanui i tō whakapehapeha nā tō ataahua. Kāore i te tika te whakaaro ki tētahi he taonga, he "taonga whakahīhī" rānei. Ina koa mēnā he aroha tō te tangata ki a koe. 

Mā tēnei whanonga a tō hoa tāne koe e whakaaro ai he taonga kore tuakiri koe. Engari ehara tēnei i te pono! Ki te whakaaro koe kei te whakaiti tō hoa i a koe mā te whakamahi i a koe hei taonga, kia tūpato ki ēnei tohu.

12 ngā tohu kei te whakamahi ia i a koe hei hoa wahine tohu

He tino pōuri te kite atu kei te manaakitia koe pērā i tētahi hoa wahine toa. Mēnā kua pātai koe ki a koe anō, "He hoa wahine toa ahau?", tērā pea ka whakaaro koe kua whakamahia, kua tinihangatia koe, ā, ka mamae pea tō ngākau . Nā te mea he nui te manaaki a ngā tāne i ngā hoa wahine toa, ā, ka atawhai hoki i a rātou, tērā pea he uaua ki te mōhio kei te mahi noa koe i ngā mea reka. He hoa wahine toa koe? E 12 ā mātou tohu hei mōhio mēnā kei te whakamahi ia i a koe hei taonga, kāore rānei.

1. Ka whiwhi koe i ngā koha nui whakaharahara, kāore he take mai i a ia

Ia wā ka tūtaki ia ki a koe, ka utaina e ia ki a koe ngā koha utu nui me ngā whakapaipai taimana. Ka whiwhi tonu koe i ēnei koha i mua i ana hoa. E tumanako ana ia kia kōrerotia e koe ēnei koha ki ētahi atu. Pērā ai ka whiwhi ia i te mana o te tangata whai rawa, o te tangata angitu.

2. Kāore he kōrero mō te heke mai

Ki te aroha pono te tāne ki a koe, ka kōrero ia mō te heke mai . Ehara tēnei i te kōrero mō te marena. He mahere poto noa iho pea, pērā i te haere tahi, te whakarite rānei mō te mutunga wiki e tū mai nei.

Engari ko te tangata e tino arohaina ana koe, e kore rawa ia e whakauru i ēnei āhuatanga ki roto i te whanaungatanga. Kāore ia e kite i a koe hei tangata ka piripono atu ia ki a ia mō te wā roa. Kei te whakamahi noa ia i a koe hei aro atu ki a ia.

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3. Kāore ia e aro ki te mōhio ki tō oranga whaiaro

Ki te aroha ia ki a koe, ka hiahia ia ki te mōhio ki ngā kōrero katoa mōu. Engari ki te mea he tino noa iho tana titiro ki a koe, ā, he mea whakanui noa iho i a koe, kāore ia e hiahia ki te mōhio pai ake ki a koe. Ko tō āhua anake tana e pai ai, ehara i te mea ko wai koe.

4. Ka whiwhi mihi anake ngā hoa wahine toa mō ō rātou āhua

I ngā wā katoa e tūtaki ai ia ki a koe, ko tō ataahua o waho anake tana e kōrero ai. Ko ana mihi e ahu mai ana i tō āhua, i ō kākahu, i ō makawe, me ngā mea katoa e pā ana ki tō āhua. Kāore ia e mihi ki a koe mō ō āhuatanga me ō āhuatanga o roto; nā te mea kāore ia e aro ki ēnā mea, kāore rānei ia e aro nui ki aua mea.

E kore rawa koe e kite i a ia e mihi ana ki a koe mō tō angitu i roto i te mahi, mō tō mātauranga, mō tō hua, tae atu ki ētahi atu āhuatanga pēnei i tō atawhai me tō auahatanga.

5. Nui atu tōna aroha ki a ia anō i a koe

Ahakoa kei te noho tahi kōrua, kāore kōrua i te tino noho tahi. He āhua kore aro kei te taha o ia. Kāore ia e pātai mai ki a koe mō tō rā, mō ō kare ā-roto rānei. He pai ki a ia te noho tahi i a koe, ā, kāore ia e aro ki te kōrero ki a koe. Engari, ina tae ki te kōrero mōna ake, mō tōna angitu rānei, ka taea e ia te kōrero tonu. Ka taea hoki e koe te kī he tangata whakahihi ia.

6. Aroha me te Whakaute

Ko te aroha me te whakaute ngā pou o tētahi whanaungatanga hauora. Ki te hiahia noa ia kia noho koe i tōna taha hei whakaatu i a koe hei hoa wahine toa, ā, kāore ia e whakaute i a koe , kāore ia e tika ana kia whiwhi i a koe. Kāore ia e aro ki a koe; engari, e aro ana ia ki te āhua o tō whakanui i tōna āhua. He rite tonu koe ki te noho hei hoa tāpiri ki a ia, arā, hei hoa wahine toa tino rongonui.

7. Ka kite koe i a ia ina hiahia ia

Ko ia tonu te kaiwhakatau i te wā me te wā e tūtaki ai kōrua. Ka whakamōhiotia wawetia koe mēnā kei te haere kōrua ki tētahi pāti, ki te tūtaki rānei ki āna hoa, ā, tera pea ka whiwhi koe i ētahi kākahu hou, whakapaipai rānei hei mau māu ki ēnei huihuinga. Ka hiahia tonu ia kia tūtaki koe ki āna hoa me tana porowhita pāpori. Kāore koe e kite i te wā pai e noho tahi ana me ia pērā i te haere ki te kiriata, te hikoi noa rānei. Ki te kī koe kia noho ko koe anake, ka whakahē noa ia i a koe.

8. Ka kōrero tonu ia mō tō ataahua

Ka kōrero tonu ia ki ana hoa mō te ataahua o tana hoa wahine, ā, ka haria koe ki te kāinga o tana hoa hei whakaatu noa i a koe. He taonga nui koe e hiahia ana ia ki te whakaatu, ki te whakamīharo i a koe.

9. E hiahia tonu ana ia kia ātaahua tō āhua

Ko tētahi o ngā tohu e manaaki ana ia i a koe he hoa wahine tohu, ko tana hiahia kia ātaahua tonu koe . Kāore, ki tana whakaaro kāore e ranea tō ataahua tūturu. Me ātaahua ō makawe me ō meka, ā, me ātaahua hoki ō kākahu. Tērā pea ka riria koe e ia mō te kore e tika te whakapaipai mō tētahi o āna huihuinga. He rite tonu tana manaaki i a koe ki tētahi whakapaipai, me te mea he rite ki tana mātaaratanga Rolex.

10. Kāore koe e rongo i tētahi hononga whaiaro

Ina tata koe ki tētahi, ka kōrero koe mō ngā kaupapa whaiaro me ngā kaupapa nui pēnei i te marena, ngā hoa me te whānau. Tokorua ngā tāngata i roto i te whanaungatanga harikoa e whakapuaki ana i ō rāua raruraru, ā, e whakawhirinaki ana tetahi ki tetahi i ngā wā uaua. Engari ki a ia, kāore koe e kite ana he mea āna hei whakapuaki, ā, kāore hoki ia e aro ki ō raruraru. Kāore rawa kōrua e kōrero . He taonga nui koe e hiahia ana ia ki te whakaatu ki a koe. Kei te whakamahi ia i a koe hei whakanui i tōna whakapehapeha.

11. Kāore he aha ki a ia tō whakaaro

I roto i te whanaungatanga, me whakaute tātou, me whakarongo hoki ki ngā whakaaro o tētahi ki tētahi. Engari ki te mea kāore ia e aro nui ana ki ō whakaaro, tera pea nā te mea kāore ia e aro nui ana ki a koe. Kei te whakamahi ia i a koe hei hoa wahine toa, ā, kāore ia e aro nui ana ki a koe.

12. Kāore koe e manukanuka ki te moni

Kāore ia e pātai nui ki a koe mō te nui o tāu e whakapau ana. Ko tāna anake e hiahia ana kia ātaahua, kia tika hoki ō kākahu i a koe e noho tahi ana me ia. Kāore koe e hiahia ki te titiro ki ngā utu i a koe e hokohoko ana, ā, māna e utu ō pire kāri nama. Tērā pea ka hoatu e ia tana kāri nama ki a koe.

Me aha koe mēnā ka whakaarohia koe he hoa wahine taonga?

• Me tono atu ki a ia kia aroha ki a koe mō wai koe: Ina kitea e koe e manaaki ana ia i a koe, he rite tonu ki tētahi hoa wahine, me kōrero atu ki a ia. Me tono atu kia aroha ia ki a koe mō tō āhua, kia maioha hoki ki a koe mō tō ataahua o roto me ō āhuatanga. Me kī atu ki a ia ehara koe i te tāre, ka taea e ia te whakakakahu tonu i ana kākahu e pai ana ki a ia i ngā wā katoa.
• Kia pakari ki a iaHe mea nui kia kaua e nekeneke haere i runga i tāu e hiahia ana mai i a ia. Ka ngana ia ki te whakatutuki i tana e pai ai, ka ārai i a koe, engari me u tonu koe ki tō tūnga. Kaua e riro i a koe te mana o te korero reka
• Tūmataiti: Me tono atu ki a ia kia kaua e whakapuakina tō whanaungatanga ki te aroaro o ētahi atu hei whakaatu noa iho i tōu ataahua.
• Kōrero ki a ia mō te heke mai: Ahakoa kāore ia e hiahia ana ki te kōrero mō te heke mai, me tohe tonu koe. Pātai atu ki a ia kei hea ia e kite ana i a ia anō me tēnei whanaungatanga i roto i ngā tau e rima. Kia kaha ki te kimi mēnā kei te tino hiahia ia ki a koe. Ki te kore, whakaarohia te wehe i a ia.
• Whakapaua te wā ki a ia: Tonoa atu ki a ia kia noho tahi kōrua, ko kōrua anake. Mā tēnei ka taea e kōrua te mōhio pai tetahi ki tetahi. Tērā pea ina tīmata kōrua te noho tahi, ka tīmata ia ki te aroha ki a koe, ki te manaaki hoki i a koe – mō te tangata ko koe tonu, ehara i te mea mō tō ataahua anake.
• Waiho atu ia mēnā kāore ia e tino aroha ana ki a koe: Ahakoa ō mahi maha, ki te kore tonu ia e aro nui ki a koe, engari e hiahia ana ki a koe mō tō ataahua anake, takahia ki a ia. Ka memeha haere tōna aroha ina kore koe e whakaae ki āna tikanga, ina tae mai rānei tētahi atu ataahua ake. Nō reira, whakarērea ia, ka noho ki tētahi e aroha pono ana, e manaaki ana hoki i a koe hei tangata

Ehara i te mea he tika ngā take e pā ana ki te katoa i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga. Ahakoa kei roto koe i te aroha, kāore te katoa e whakaae ana ki ēnei wawata aroha. He mea nui kia tino tupato koe ki te whiriwhiri i ō hoa. Ki te kore, ka mutu pea koe me tētahi e aro nui ana ki tō ataahua o waho, kaua ki tō āhua tangata. Ka whakamahia koe e ēnei tāngata hei aro atu, ā, ka atawhai i a koe pērā i tētahi taonga. Nō reira, whakarongo mai ki a mātou ina kī atu mātou ki a koe he nui ngā mea pai ake e tika ana māu . I ētahi wā, he pai ake te tuku i a koe i te pupuri i tētahi mea kāore e hari ai koe.

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Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.