He aha te Simping, ā, he tohu kino tēnei mō ngā tāne?

Kua rongo pea koe i tētahi e karangatia ana he "simp" i runga ipurangi. Tērā pea i roto i tētahi meme, i tētahi tweet, i tētahi wāhanga kōrero rānei e whakahengia ana tētahi mō te "mahi nui rawa" mō tētahi e arohaina ana. Ā, kua pātai koe, "He aha te simping? Ā, he aha te simp?" Kua horapa haere te kupu i ngā tau tata nei, engari ko te pono, kua roa ake i TikTok, i Reddit rānei. Ahakoa e whakamahia whānuitia ana te kupu, e tohu ana ki tētahi mea tūturu - he tauira whanonga e ringihia ana e te tangata te nui rawa o tōna kaha ki tētahi tangata kāore e whakahoki mai ana i te kaha ōrite.

Nō reira, kia tika tā tātou kōrero i te tīmatanga: ko te atawhai, te aroha, te tuwhera rānei o ngā kare ā-roto, ehara i te mea he tangata ngāwari koe. Engari, ina tīmata tō whakaaro nui ki te whakawhirinaki ki te āhua o te mahi a tētahi atu ki a koe, ā, ina nui rawa tō tuku i ō whakaaro, tō whakapāha, me te whai tonu i te whakaae, koinei te wā hei tūtaki me te pātai ki a koe anō he aha te mea e tupu ana.

Ki te mea he mōhio koe ki tēnā, me āwhina koe i tō haerenga whakaaroaro mā te wehewehe i te tikanga o te simping, tōna āhua i roto i ngā whanaungatanga, me pēhea e taea ai e koe te mōhio kua whiti koe i taua rārangi. Kāore mātou i konei hei whakama i tetahi. Nā te mea, kua mahia e tātou katoa ngā mea kāore e whakahīhī ana tātou. Engari mā te mārama ki ngā tohu ka taea e koe te whakaatu i roto i ngā whanaungatanga me te mārama ake, te maia, me te whakaute i a koe anō. Ahakoa kei te āwangawanga koe kei te simping koe, kua karangatia koe hei simping, kei te hiahia noa rānei koe kia kaua e taka ki taua mahanga, koinei tō whakamāramatanga kore-kore mō te mutunga o te aroha hauora me te tīmatanga o ngā tauira kino.

He aha te Simping?

Ki te kī māmā noa, ko te "simping" e pā ana ki te whanonga tino ngohengohe, tino hiahia rānei ki tētahi e arohaina ana e koe, ina koa kāore te mahi i utua. I roto i te reo ipurangi, ko te simp he tangata, he tāne te nuinga, e mahi ana i ngā mea maha mō tētahi tangata e pai ana ki a rātou, e kī ana, e mahi ana rānei i tētahi mea hei whakamanawareka i a rātou me te tumanako ka whiwhi i te manako. Ko te whakamāramatanga o te simp i roto i kupu whakaipoipo hou Ko te whakawhanui rawa i a koe, te tuku i te aro, i ngā koha, me ngā whakamoemiti ki tētahi atu, me te wareware i tōu ake whakaute ki a koe anō, i ōu ake rohe rānei.

I ahu mai te kupu simp i te kupu "simpleton" ā, kua roa e whakamahia ana, engari i tino rongonui haere i te tau 2020 nā te auahatanga #SimpNation a TikTok. Kātahi ka hiahia te katoa ki te mōhio he aha te tikanga o te kupu simp, ka puta ake ngā katakata me te kī he simping ngā mahi aroha iti. Hei tauira, i kī tētahi kohinga kōrero rongonui he simp koe mēnā ka whakautu koe i tētahi waea FaceTime mai i tētahi kōtiro, ka tuku atu rānei i tō hūti i a ia e makariri ana, he whanonga noa iho ēnei a ngā tāne pai! Nā te pikinga o te whakamahinga, i huri te kupu simping hei kupu rongonui, he maha ngā wā ka whakamahia hei tawai ki ngā "tāne pai."

Pērā i te nuinga o ngā mea, kua nui rawa te whakamahi a te ipurangi i te tapanga. Koia te mea nui kia pātaihia te pātai, he aha te simping i roto i ngā whanaungatanga? Ko te tikanga, ko te wā e tino hiahia ana tetahi tangata ki te whakamīharo, e ngana ana rānei ki te miharo i tetahi atu, i te nuinga o te wā hei ngana ki te "hoko" i te aroha. Anei ētahi tauira o te whanonga simping: 

• Te tuku i ngā manaaki mutunga kore pērā i te mahi i ngā mahi kāinga a tētahi, i ngā mahi rānei kāore i tonoa e rātou
• Te noho mārire me te whakaae ki ngā kōrero katoa a te tangata, me te wehi ki te whakapuaki i tētahi whakahē
• Te tuku tonu i ngā mihi
• Te tuku moni, ngā koha utu nui rānei ki tētahi i arohaina i runga ipurangi
• Te whakarite i tō oranga kia aro atu ki tētahi e kore nei e aro nui mai ki a koe
• Te tuhi me te tuku karere takirua tētahi e kore e tino whakautu

E whakatūpato ana te kaiako whanaungatanga a Dionne Reid, "Ehara te aroha i te aroha; engari ko te ngaronga o tō ake uara i te whai i te aroha o tētahi atu." Tērā pea ka pātai koe, "He aha te tangata ka aroha ai mēnā he maha ngā wā ka arahi ki ngā kare ā-roto kāore i utua me te mamae o te ngākau?" He maha ngā wā, ka puta mai i te iti o te whakaaro ki a ia anō, i te kore rānei e māia. 

Tērā pea ka whakapono te tangata me "whiwhi" rātou i te aroha mā te hoatu nui. E kī ana ngā tohunga hinengaro ko te hunga kore māia, ko te hunga iti nei te wheako ki te whakaipoipo, ka nui ake te tūponotanga ka taka ki roto i te whanonga whakahihi. Tērā pea ka aroha rātou ki tētahi e whakaarohia ana e rātou he rerekē i tō rātou taumata, ā, ka whakapau kaha ki te whakamanawareka i a rātou. 

I ētahi wā, ka taupatupatu te simping ki ngā āhua e pai ai te tangata, e whakawhirinaki tahi ana rānei. Ka taea hoki e te moemoeā pai te akiaki i te simping. E whakaaro ana te simping mā ngā mahi nui ka "kite" te tangata i tōna uara, ā, ka hoki mai te aroha. Engari, he maha ngā wā kāore te ao tūturu e mahi pērā, ā, he maha ngā wā kāore i tonoa, kāore hoki i te hiahiatia ngā manaakitanga a te simping.

Te pānui e pā ana: 8 Ngā Tohu e Tino Kaha Ana Koe – Ngā Tohutohu Hei Ārai

10 Ngā Tohu Kei te Whakaiti Koe i te Kai

Nā, e mārama ana te whakamāramatanga o te whakamāmā i tētahi mea: ehara ētahi whanonga i te mahi a tētahi whaiāipo tūmanako he mea hanga kia pērā. Heoi anō, he uaua ki te mōhio kei te whiti koe i taua rārangi, inā koa kei te mau koe i ngā kare ā-roto kaha mō tētahi. Tērā pea ka waiho koe kia whakaaro me pēhea te mōhio mēnā kei te aroha koe, kei te whakaatu rānei i te aroha hauora mō tētahi. Āe, ko te whakautu kei roto pea i ēnei tohu matua e 10 kei te aroha koe:

1. Ka whakapau moni koe i tua atu i tōu kaha hei miharo i a rātou

Ko tētahi o ngā tauira matarohia o te whanonga whakapati ko te whakapau moni nui ki te tangata e pai ana koe. Kei te utu koe i ā rātou kai katoa, kei te hoko koha utu nui, kei te whakapau moni rānei ki ngā tīkiti kōnohete hei whakahari i a rātou, ahakoa kāore e taea e koe te utu? Ko te whakapau kaha ki te utu i ā rātou hiahia, i ā rātou mea nui rānei, i ia wā, he tohu kino tēnei. 

Ae, he mea aroha te manaaki i tētahi tangata motuhake i ētahi wā. Engari ki te mea kei te whakapau moni tonu koe, kei te tuku taonga nui rānei ki a rātou me te tumanako ka whakahokia mai tō aroha, he mahi tinihanga pea tēnā. Hei tauira, ko tētahi tāne e whakapau ana i ana penapena hei hoko waea hou mā tana i aroha ai, ahakoa kāore ia i te tuku karere mai, kāore ia i te "atawhai", kei te takahi ia i te wāhi tino pouri. Kia mahara, kāore e taea te hoko i te aroha, ā, kāore ngā hononga pono e hiahia kia pakaru.

2. Ka tuku karere tonu koe ki a rātou 

Ko tētahi atu tohu tawhito kei te kitea e koe ko te hiahia nui ki te tuku karere kuputuhi, ki te tuku karere rānei ki te tangata, ahakoa he iti noa iho ā rātou whakautu. Ka tukuna e koe "Mōrena!" i ia rā, ka ringihia ki a rātou he meme, he mihi, he whakahōutanga mō tō oranga, ā, ka whakautu mai rātou i te wā e tika ana, mēnā he whakautu. Heoi, kei te tīmata tonu koe. 

Ka taea e koe te tuku karere takirua, tuku karere takitoru rānei mēnā kāore rātou e whakautu mai, tirohia tō waea me te manukanuka i ia meneti torutoru, ā, ka mataku kia whakautu mai rātou. Ko tēnei momo whanonga ka puta mai i te hiahia nui kia aro mai rātou, kia whakamanahia hoki. I roto i ngā taunekeneke hauora, he rua ngā taha, he taurite hoki ngā taunekeneke. I roto i te aratau whakangā, kotahi te tangata e whai ana i te katoa. 

E hono ana ngā rangahau i te nui rawa o te tirotiro waea me te tuku karere ki te nui ake o te manukanuka i roto i ngā whanaungatanga kore utu. Nō reira, ki te mea kei te tuhi karere koe i ngā paraka roa, ā, kotahi te kupu e whakautua ana, kāore rānei he whakautu, hoki whakamuri. Kāore koe e tika kia pērā. tono kia arohia.

Te pānui e pā ana: 7 Ngā Tikanga Kino mō te Whakaipoipo me Whakamutu Inaianei Tonu

3. Ka whakarērea tonutia e koe ō mahere hei whakatutuki i aua mahere

Pātai atu ki a koe anō: ka whakakorea e koe ō hoa, ka mahue rānei ngā mahi nui i ngā wā katoa e tonoa mai ana e taua tangata? Ki te whakarerekē tonu koe i tō kaupapa mahi, ki te whakaroa rānei i ngā herenga o mua, ki te wātea rānei koe i te wā tika mō tētahi atu, kei te tino pukumahi koe. He pai te ngāwari i ētahi wā, engari kāore e pai te whakanoho tonu i tā rātou kaupapa mahi ki runga ake i tō ake oranga. Te whanaungatanga hauora Me whakaae ngā taha e rua, kaua ko te tangata kotahi e mahi tonu ana i te mea e pai ana. Ki te kata ō hoa ka "peke koe mēnā ka mea ia ka peke" koe, ki te mea rānei kei te whakama koe i te tango i tētahi rā mōu ake, kua tae ki te wā ki te tirotiro i te pono. 

4. Ka mahi koe i ngā mea mā rātou, kāore koe e mahi mā tētahi atu

Kei te whakapau kaha koe ki te mahi i ngā mea katoa mō tēnei tangata i roto i ngā huarahi tino nui, i waho rānei i te āhua o tōna āhua? Tērā pea kei te hiahia koe ki te taraiwa mō ngā haora e whā ki te kawe mai i tētahi kai mā rātou, ki te āwhina i a rātou ki te tuhi pepa i te pō i mua i te wā tika i te mea kei a koe ō ake rā kati, ki te whakahaere rānei i ngā mahi me ngā mahi kāinga mā rātou kāore e tumanakohia e ngā hoa noa. He tohu whakatūpato katoa ēnei.

Ehara i te mea kino te tino atawhai, te āwhina rānei, engari he maha ngā wā ka uru te mahi atawhai koretake ki te tumanako ka whiwhi atawhai. E kī ana a Dionne, "Mō te noho tahi me te tangata e arohaina ana e koe, ko te rerekētanga i waenga i te atawhai me te aroha ko te maha o ngā wā karekau he tono mō ngā atawhai a te tangata atawhai. Ka whakanohoia te tangata ki tētahi tūranga herenga kāore i tonoa e rātou." 

Te pānui e pā ana: 21 Ngā Tohu e Hiahia Ana Ia Kia Tino Mōhio Koe Ki A Ia

5. He uaua ki a koe te kī "kāo" ki a rātou

He mārama noa iho tēnei tohu: te tino ngohengohe. Hei tauira, ka tono rātou mō tētahi manaakitanga, kei te whakaae koe. E hiahia ana rātou ki te whiriwhiri i tētahi wharekai, ā, ka kai koe i tā rātou e hiahia ana. Ka whanonga rātou i roto i ngā huarahi kāore koe e pai ai, ā, ka ngau koe i tō arero nā te mea kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakapataritari i a rātou. Ki te whakaaro tonu koe, "Me kōrero ahau... engari kāore au e hiahia ki te tūpono ka riri rātou, ka wehe atu rānei," ko taua wehi kei te whakahaere i te whakaaturanga. 

E mea ana a Dionne, "Ki te mea ko te aroaro o tētahi te mea nui ake i tō ake rangimārie, kua ngaro tō hononga ki tō ake pokapū." E kore te whanaungatanga hauora e pakaru mēnā ka mea koe, "Kāore e taea e au te mahi i tēnā", i ētahi wā. Nō reira, mēnā ko te kupu "āe" anake i roto i tō papakupu e pā ana ki a rātou, kua tae ki te wā ki te whakahoki mai i tō iwi tuarā. Ko te whakaae tonu ki ngā mea kāore koe e hiahia ana he mea hauora. 

6. Ka whakatūria rātou e koe ki runga i te turanga, ka whakanuia hoki rātou e koe

E titiro ana koe ki tēnei tangata he tino kore he? He maha ngā wā ka whanake te hiahia o ngā Simps ki te aro nui ki a rātou anō. Kāore e taea e te tangata e pai ana ki a rātou te mahi he, ā, ki tā rātou titiro, he tino motuhake tēnei tangata ki tētahi atu. Tērā pea ka kitea koe e tiaki ana i a rātou ahakoa e kino ana tā rātou mahi ki a koe, e whakamārama ana rānei i ā rātou whanonga kino. Tērā pea ka whakaaro koe kāore he tangata e rite ana te ataahua, te mōhio, me te katakata ki a rātou, ā, ka tino waimarie koe ki te whiwhi noa i ētahi o ā rātou aro.

Ko tēnei whakanui i te tangata he tohu kāore koe e kite ana i a rātou hei tangata noa, engari hei whakaaro nui, hei taonga rānei. E kī ana tēnei kei te hanga koe i tētahi moemoeā mō te tangata nei, mō tētahi whanaungatanga e tumanakohia ana rānei, me te kore e aro ki te ao tūturu. Ko te whakanoho i tētahi ki runga i te tūranga teitei ko te whakaiti i ōna hapa me te kore e aro ki tētahi atu. ngā haki whero i roto i te whanaungatanga.

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7. Kei te rapu tonu koe i tā rātou whakaae me te whakamana

Kei te whakaaro tonu koe, "Ka nui ake rānei tō rātou pai ki ahau i tēnei?" Kei te tirotiro koe i tā rātou urupare ki ngā mea katoa e mahia ana e koe, mai i tō kākahu ki ō pou Instagram, me te tumanako kia mihia rātou, kia arohia rānei? Ina mahi koe i tētahi mea atawhai mā rātou, he mea āwangawanga noa iho rānei, he tumanako rānei ka whakahoki mai rātou i ō kare ā-roto? Ki te pono koe, ā, ko te whakautu e anga atu ana ki te whakautu whakamutunga, kua mau koe i roto i te mahanga whakaae. 

Ka tīmata te whakaaro nui o te tangata ki a ia anō ki te whakawhirinaki katoa ki ngā urupare a te tangata. Hei tauira, ka taea e koe te whakarerekē i ō hiahia, i ō tikanga, i tō āhua rānei kia rite ki tāu e whakaaro ana he hiahia tā rātou. He ngaronga kino tēnei o te pono. Reddit kaiwhakamahi I runga i te r/dating_advice i whakaahua pai ia i tēnei: ​​"Ko te tangata mangere he tangata kāore e whakaute ana i a ia anō. E whakaaro ana ia he iti noa iho, kāore rānei he uara ā-roto ōna, ā, e whakapono ana ia me mahi ia i ngā mahi tino rerekē hei waihanga uara mō te mea e arohaina ana e ia." 

8. Kāore koe e aro ki ngā tohu whero i roto i ā rātou whanonga

Tērā pea ka kī mai ō hoa kei te whakamātau koe i tēnei tangata, kei te whakamahi i a koe, kei te whakahē rānei i a koe, engari ka rapua e koe he whakamārama mō tēnā. I roto i tōu ngākau, tera pea ka kite koe i ngā tohu kino pēnei i te, 

• Ka waea noa rātou ina hiahia rātou ki tētahi manaakitanga
• Ka takaro rātou ki ētahi atu i tō aroaro
• Kei te whakamahi noa rātou i a koe hei taonga whakangāwari i a koe e whakaipoipo ana i tētahi atu

Heoi anō, ka whiriwhiri koe ki te huna i ō kanohi nā te mea mā te tū atu ki te pono ka ngaro pea rātou. Koinei tētahi o ngā tohu kino o te whakamā: te whakaae ki ngā whanonga kino kia noho tonu ai ki te ao o tētahi. Tērā pea ka mea koe ki a koe anō, "Kāore he aha, he pai ki ahau te noho hei hoa noa iho," me te tumanako ka huri ō rātou whakaaro, i taua wā tonu, kei te takahi rātou i ō rohe katoa. 

E mea ana a Dionne, "Mā te kore aro ki ngā haki whero ka memeha noa te māramatanga o tō pūmanawa. Whakarongo ki tēnā. Kei te ārahi tonu i a koe." Mena kei te whakahāweatia e ō pūmanawa, e te hunga katoa rānei e aroha ana ki a koe, ā, kei te whakakorea tonutia e koe, kāore koe i te rangatira, i te manawanui rānei. Kei te tukinotia koe. 

Te pānui e pā ana: 15 Ngā Tohu Whero mō te Hononga hei Tūpato mā te Tāne

9. Ka nui rawa ō kare ā-roto, tō whakaari rānei mō rātou

Mā te Simping ka taea e koe te whakanui ake i tō taumata kare ā-roto ki te 11 nā te mea he nui rawa tō whakapau kaha ki tēnei tangata, ā, he nui te pānga o ia taunekeneke iti. Tērā pea ko tō wairua me tō āhua hinengaro e whakawhirinaki katoa ana ki tā rātou mahi ki a koe i tētahi rā. Hei tauira, ki te whakautu rātou ki tō karere, ka pai ake tō rā. Engari ki te mea waiho koe kia pānuihia, kei te taka koe ki te pouri. 

Tērā pea ka tino pōuri koe, ka hae, ka manukanuka rānei mō ngā mea iti noa iho, pērā i te kore e pai ki tāu pou, i te kata rānei ki tētahi atu. Tērā pea ka hangaia e koe he whakaari hei kukume i tō rātou aro, ka pāngia rānei koe e te pouri ina kore ngā mea e haere pērā i tō tumanako. Ko tēnei momo pōrearea o ngā kare ā-roto he tohu kei te huri rawa tō ao ki ō rātou whakaaro. 

10. Ka wareware koe ki ōu ake hiahia, ki ōu whāinga, ki ōu hoa rānei

Ko te tohu nui rawa atu pea kei te whakamātau koe ko te ngaro o tō tirohanga ki "koe". I a koe e manaaki ana i tētahi atu, ka tukuna e ngā whakamātau ō rātou ake oranga kia taka ki te taha o te ara. Nō reira, pātai atu ki a koe anō, 

• Kua whakarērea e koe ngā mahi whakangahau i arohaina e koe i mua nā te mea kua whakatapua tō wā katoa ki aua mahi? 
• Kei te memeha haere ō hoa nā te mea kei te whakarērea tonu e koe ō hoa kia wātea ai koe ki te tautoko i tō hoa aroha? 
• Ā, me pēhea ō whāinga whaiaro, pērā i te mātauranga, te mahi, te hauora rānei? Kei te pāngia aua whāinga? 

He hua kino te wareware i te tiaki i a koe anō me te whanaketanga whaiaro o te noho puku. Ki te patu koe i ō hiahia me ō hiahia katoa mō tētahi atu tangata, ehara i te mea kei te kore koe e whai whakaaro nui ki a koe anō. Kei te whakarite koe i a koe anō mō ​​te pouri, ā, he mea whakamīharo, he maha ngā wā kāore taua taumata patunga tapu e maiohahia ana e te tangata kē. 

Te pānui e pā ana: He tangata aroha tū tata koe? 15 Ngā Tohu He Hoa Tārua Koe

Te Aroha me te Simping: Te Rerekētanga o ngā Mea e Rua

I te tirohanga tuatahi, he rite te simping ki te aroha. Heoi anō, ko te whakaatu aroha, te mahi whakaaro nui, me te whakatairanga i te harikoa o tētahi atu tangata te mea nui. Engari ko te rerekētanga matua kei roto i te hihiri, te taurite, me te tauutuutu.

Ko te whanaungatanga hauora e ahu mai ana i te whakaute i a ia anō me te maioha ki tētahi ki tētahi. Ka hoatu, ka whiwhi hoki ngā hoa e rua, ka whakaae tahi ina hiahiatia, ā, ka whakaatu i te manaaki i roto i ngā huarahi e āhua maori ana, kaua e akiakihia. Ngā tohu aroha i ahu mai i te wāhi o te māia me te tauutuutu. Ko te simping, i tētahi atu taha, he maha ngā wā ka ahu mai i te koretake, i te wehi rānei kei whakakahoretia. Engari i te noho tahi, ka huri hei whai taha kotahi, ka hoatu tonu tetahi tangata, ka nui rawa te manaaki, ka tuku rānei i ōna rohe i runga i te tumanako ka whiwhi aroha. Anei ngā āhuatanga matua e wehewehe ana i ngā mea e rua:

Te pānui e pā ana: He aha ngā tāne e kore ai e tango i te kāo hei whakautu

He tohu kino te moe tāne?

Te piko whakamuri mō tētahi kōtiro, te whakaae tonu, te utu tonu, te karakia ki te whenua e takahia ana e ia. He haki whero tēnā? Ehara i te mea pango me te mā te whakautu, engari e anga atu ana ki te "āe, he haki whero pea" mēnā ka whiti ki te whanonga pono. Anei te take: 

• Ko te whakaute i a koe anō te mea nui: Ki te whakaatu te whanonga whakahihi a te tāne kāore ia e whakaute ana i a ia anō, he tohu whakatūpato tēnā mō te hauora o te whanaungatanga. Tērā pea ka piripono, ka riri, ka whakawhirinaki rānei ki ngā kare ā-roto o te hoa kāore e whakaute i a ia anō.
• Te kore o te tauutuutu: He whanaungatanga tōmua te aroha pono, engari ko te aroha pono he taha kotahi, ā, ka tohu pea i te kore hototahi, i te tūkino pea rānei. Ko te mahi pōuri ki tētahi kāore e whakahoki mai, ahakoa he iti noa iho, he tohu kino tēnei o tētahi hononga hauora kore.
• Te rerekētanga i waenga i te noho puku me te noho aroha: Ehara te atawhai me te aroha i te tohu ārai. Ko te rerekētanga i waenga i te noho puku me te noho aroha kei roto i te hihiri me te taurite. E kī ana a Dionne, "Ko te noho puku he mahi i ngā mea hei whakaatu i te uara o te wahine. Ko te noho aroha he mahi i ngā mea hei whakaatu i te uara o te wahine." Ko te tuatahi i ahu mai i te wāhi o te koretake, ko te tuarua i ahu mai i te wāhi o te maia me te aroha.
• He whakakāhore: He maha ngā wāhine e kite ana i te whanonga tino whakahihi, kāore hoki e taea te pupuri. Ka taea e rātou te whakamā, te arahi rānei ki te ngaronga o te whakaute ki te tāne. Ki te kore te tāne e whakaatu i a ia anō, tera pea ka tīmata te hoa rangatira ki te whakamahi kino, ki te ngaro rānei te hiahia. Ko te whanaungatanga hauora e hiahia ana kia rua ngā tāngata takitahi, kaua ko tētahi e tautoko tonu ana i te whakapehapeha o tētahi atu.
• Te pūmanawa mō te whakarerekētanga: Heoi anō, ko te tangata e hiahia ana ki te whakamanawareka i tetahi, ka kukume pea i ngā hoa mahi hei whakahaere, hei whakamahi rānei i a ia. I tēnei wā, ko te ngoikore he tohu kino ka ārahi i te tangata ki roto i te te whanau paitini

Me pēhea te whakamutu i te noho hei tangata ngāwari — 9 Ngā Tohutohu

He mea whakama, he mea pouri rānei te mōhio kua noho puku koe, engari ko te rongo pai ka taea e koe te whakarerekē i tēnei tauira. Ehara i te whiu mo te ora! Ko te wehenga atu i te whanonga puku ko te hanga i tō whakaute ki a koe anō, te whakatū rohe hauora, me te ako i ngā huarahi hauora hei whakaatu i te aroha kāore e uru ki te patunga tapu. 

Ki te mea kei te rapu tohutohu koe mō te whakamutu i te tinihanga mō tētahi, anei ētahi rautaki whai hua e iwa. Ka tīmata mā te whakanui i a koe anō kia puta mai ai te aroha, te atawhai rānei e hoatu ana e koe i te kaha, kaua i te rawakore. Kia tīmata tātou:

1. Whakaaetia te raruraru me tōna pānga ki a koe

Ko te taahiraa tuatahi ki te kore e noho hei tangata whakahihi ko te mōhio. Kia pono ki a koe anō mō ​​ngā pānga o te whakahihi ki tō oranga. Kei te ngenge koe, kei te manukanuka, kei te tangohia mo te koreKei te kite koe kua ngaro ētahi o tō tuakiri i a koe e whai ana kia whakaaetia koe e tetahi? Whakaarohia ngā pānga kino. Tērā pea kei te hinga koe ki muri i ngā whāinga whaiaro, kua pāngia rānei tō hauora hinengaro e te manukanuka tonu mō te whakamanawareka i tēnei tangata. 

Tērā pea he mamae te whakaae, "Kua whakarērea e au taku whakaute i a au anō mō ​​tētahi kāore e whakahoki mai ana i te pai," engari he whakamana te mahi pēnā. Tuhia ngā wā motuhake i mōhio ai koe i nui rawa tō kaha ki te mahi, me te āhua o ō kare ā-roto. He mea nui tēnei whakaae nā te mea ka huri taua kare ā-roto pōuri "kāore he mea e tika ana" hei māramatanga mō te take matua. Mā te mārama ko tō whanonga he wāhanga o te take, ka whakahokia e koe te mana whakahaere ki ō ringaringa. Ehara i te mea he "kino" te tangata kē, he "whakapainga" rānei, engari he nui rawa tō hoatu. Ā, ka taea e koe te huri.

2. Whakaritea nga rohenga marama

Hei mārama ki te whakamutu i te tinihanga mō tētahi, me mārama te whakautu ki te pātai, he aha te take e tinihanga ai te tangata? E ai ki tā tātou i kōrero ai, ko te tikanga he, 

• Te whakaiti i a koe ano 
• Te momo piri āwangawanga 
• Te paitiki 
• Ko nga ahuatanga e pai ana ki te tangata 
• Te Kotahitanga

Ko te whakatakoto rohe hauora he huarahi kua whakamatautauria mō te tiaki i a koe anō i ngā whanonga kino e ahu mai ana i ēnei take matua. Nō reira, kua tae ki te wā ki te whakatakoto i ētahi rohe. Whakatauhia he aha tāu e mahi ai, he aha hoki tāu e kore ai e mahi mā ētahi atu, ā, piri tonu ki tēnā. Hei tauira, ka whakatakoto pea koe i tētahi ture kia kaua e whakautu ki ngā karere kuputuhi kāore i te hiahiatia i muri i tētahi haora, kia kaua rānei e whakapau moni ki tua atu i tētahi moni kua whakaritea mō ngā koha/ngā rā, ki te kore e mārama he whanaungatanga ōrite te whanaungatanga. Tērā pea ko te whakatau kia kaua e aro ki te kore whakaute: ki te waea mai rātou i te 2 i te ata mō te haerenga, ā, kāore koe e pai ki tēnā, ko te rohe pea ko "Kāo, me nui ake taku whakamōhiotanga". 

Kei roto hoki i ngā rohe te wā mōu ake. Hei tauira, "I ia Wenerei, ka noho tahi ahau me ō hoa/whānau, ā, kāore au e whakakore i tēnā i muri i te kitenga i a ia i te meneti whakamutunga." Ina whakatakoto koe i ēnei rohe, kōrerohia mārire mēnā e tika ana. Kāore koe e hiahia ki te kī "Kāore au e noho puku ana!" Me kī noa i tō wātea me ō herenga: "Kāore e taea e au te kōrero i tēnei wā, ka kōrero anō ahau ki a koe āpōpō," me "Aroha mai, kāore e taea e au te mahi i tēnā." 

Ki te mea kua taunga te tangata ki te kore he rohe āu, tera pea ka ohorere rātou, ka pana rānei ki muri. Kia kaha tonu. Whakautehia koe kia nui ai te whakaute i a koe anō. Ko tētahi pānga pai ko te nui ake o te whakaute o te tangata ki a koe ina whakaute koe i a koe anō. Ā, ki te kore tetahi e whakaute i ō rohe? He tohu kino tēnā mō rātou, ā, he pai ake te noho kore taua āhuatanga.

Te pānui e pā ana: Ngā Momo Rohe e 7 i roto i ngā Hononga hei Whakakaha i te Hononga

3. Arotahi anō ki ō ake whāinga me ōu hiahia

Ko tētahi o ngā tohutohu pai mō te whakamutu i te mahi tinihanga ko te hanga i tētahi oranga kāore e aro noa ki te mea e arohaina ana e koe. Whakaarohia ngā mahi whakangahau, ngā hiahia, me ngā moemoeā kua mahue pea i a koe. Kua tae ki te wā kia whakahokia mai ēnei ki mua. He pai tonu ki a koe te toi, ngā hākinakina, te waehere, te puoro, engari i pau ngā marama kua pahure ake nei ki te titiro noa ki tō waea pūkoro e tatari ana mō tētahi karere kuputuhi? Hoki atu ki aua hiahia. 

Whakatakotoria ētahi whāinga whaiaro hei whakahihiri i a koe, ā, kāore he pānga ki te miharo i tētahi. Tērā pea ko te haere ki te whare takaro i ngā wā katoa, te ako i tētahi pūkenga hou, te whakatairanga i tō umanga, te whakarite rānei i tētahi haerenga me ō hoa. Mā te arotahi ki tō ake tipu, e rua ngā mea nui ka puta: 

• Ka nui ake tō māia, tō hiahia hoki—ngā āhuatanga e ātaahua ana i roto i ngā whanaungatanga hauora
• Ka whakakīia tō hinengaro me tō wā, ā, ka iti ake te wāhi hei whakaaroaro nui mō taua tangata.

Ehara i te mea ka whakanui ake i tō whakaaro ki a koe anō anake, engari ka huri anō hoki i te kaha hihiri kia taurite anō. Kāore koe i te tangata kāore he mahi i tua atu i te ngākau pono; he tangata whai kaupapa koe. He mea ātaahua, he mea hauora hoki tēnā.

4. Ako ki te kii "kao" 

Mō te hunga e hiahia ana ki te whakahari i te tangata, ka rite te kupu "kāo" ki tētahi kupu e whā ngā reta. Engari ko te whakawhirinaki, ko tētahi o ngā kupu tino whakaora i te reo Pākehā. Tīmata mā ngā huarahi iti mēnā me mahi. Ki te tono rātou mō tētahi mea kāore e pai, whakaharatau ki te kī, "Aroha mai, kāore e taea e au i tēnei wā." Ki te ngana rātou ki te haerenga hara koe, pēhi rānei, kia mau ki tō tūnga. Kāore koe e nama ki te tuku kupu whakamāori roa ki tētahi. He rerenga kōrero katoa te "Kāo". 

I te tīmatanga, tērā pea ka pā mai te manukanuka ki a koe. Tērā pea ka āwangawanga koe, "Ka mutu rānei tō rātou pai ki ahau mēnā ka kī atu ahau kāo?" Engari kia mahara, ki te mea ko te aroha o tētahi ki a koe e whakawhirinaki ana ki te kore o ō rohe, o ō hiahia rānei, kāore taua aroha e tika ana kia mau. I roto i te wā, ka māmā haere. Ā, i ia wā ka piri koe ki te "kāo" ā, kāore te rangi e hinga, ka nui ake tō māia. He taahiraa nui tēnei i waho o te rohe ngāwari ki roto i te āhua taurite ake. E hiahiatia ana te taurite e te whakaaro nui ki a koe anō, ā, mā te kī atu kāo ka puta taua taurite.

Te pānui e pā ana: 21 Ngā Huānga o te Whakawhanake i te Whakaute i roto i te Hononga

5. Whakawhanakehia he wairua whakaute hauora mōu ake

He āhua whānui tēnei tohutohu mō te whakamutu i te simping engari he tino hira: me whakapai ake i tō tirohanga ki a koe anō. Mena ko te simping tō tauira, tera pea kei te whakanui koe i ētahi atu ki runga ake i a koe, nā te mea i roto i tōu ngākau, tera pea ka whakaaro koe kei runga ake rātou i a koe. Kua tae ki te wā ki te wero i taua kōrero. He rite tonu tō hiranga ki te tangata e whakanuia ana e koe. Tīmata ki te atawhai i a koe anō me te āwangawanga kua tukuna e koe. Tērā pea kei roto i tēnei ko ngā mahi iti pēnei i te tiaki i tō āhua, te kai pai, te whakakorikori tinana, ehara i te mea mō tētahi atu, engari mōu ake. 

Kei roto hoki he kōrero ā-roto. Kia aro ki tō kōrero ki a koe anō. Ki te whakaaro pinepine koe, "Kāore au i te pai mō rātou" me "Me mahi ahau i te X, ki te kore, kāore he tangata e aroha ki ahau," hopukia aua whakaaro ka pātai atu. He aha koe e kore ai e pai? He hapa tō te katoa. Ehara i te mea kāore koe e tika kia whakautehia, kia arohaina rānei. I ētahi wā, mā te tuhi i tētahi rārangi o ō āhuatanga pai me ō whakatutukitanga ka āwhina i a koe ki te whakamahara i tō uara.

Tērā pea ka whakaarohia e koe te rapu tautoko hei hanga i te whakaaro nui ki a koe anō, ahakoa te kōrero ki tētahi hoa pono, te whakauru atu ki tētahi rōpū tautoko, te toro atu rānei ki tētahi kaiwhakaora hinengaro. Ka taea e tētahi tohunga hauora hinengaro te āwhina i a koe ki te wetewete i ngā take e hono ai koe i tō whakaaro nui ki te whakaae a ētahi atu, me pēhea hoki te hanga anō i tō whakaaro nui mai i roto. I a koe e tipu haere ana te whakaaro nui ki a koe anō, ka kite koe kua mutu tō manawanui ki ētahi whanonga. Ka tata noa te whakaaro, "Taria, he pai ake te mea e tika ana māku i te noho hei kōwhiringa, hei kaimahi rānei." 

6. Whakapuakina ō kare ā-roto me ō hiahia ki te aroaro o te marea

Ko tētahi mahanga ka taka ngā tāngata tinihanga ki roto, ko te huna i ō rātou kare ā-roto, i ō rātou hiahia rānei, nā te wehi kei raru rātou. Tērā pea kua noho puku koe ki te pouri, e mahi ana i ēnei mea pai katoa, engari kāore i te whakapuaki pono i ō hiahia. Kua tae ki te wā ki te whakarerekē i tēnā. Ko te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero te mea nui ki tētahi whanaungatanga hauora. Ki te mea he kare ā-roto aroha tōu ki tētahi e kite ana i a koe he hoa anake, kaua e noho tonu me te tumanako ka kite rātou i tō aroha, whakaarohia te whakamōhio mārie i ō kare ā-roto, me te rite ki te whakaute i tā rātou whakautu, ahakoa ehara i te mea i tumanakohia e koe. 

Ki te mea kei roto koe i tētahi whanaungatanga, i tētahi whakaipoipo rānei, ā, kua ngau tō arero mō ngā mea e whakararuraru ana i a koe, tīmatahia te whakapuaki i aua mea. Hei tauira, "Kei te pouri ahau ina whakakorehia e koe ngā mahere i te meneti whakamutunga," "E mōhio ana ahau kua whakaae tonu ahau ki a koe, engari ko te pono, i ētahi wā ka pai ake ki ahau me mahi tāua i tētahi mea e pai ana ki ahau." Ehara tēnei i te kī he pakanga ohorere, he kaha rawa rānei. He pono noa iho tāu kōrero. 

He wāhanga nui tēnei o te ako me pēhea te kore e noho hei tangata whakapatipati, nā te mea he maha ngā wā ka huna te kare ā-roto i roto i te whakapatipati, me te mahi atawhai me te tumanako ka whiwhi i ngā utu kāore i te kōrerotia. He wāhi whakatipu tēnā mō te mārama kore, me te te mauahara i roto i te whanaungatangaMā te kōrero, ka whakarite koe ehara koe i te mātārai wahangu noa iho. Tērā pea he mea whakamataku nā te mea kei tūpono koe ki te whakakorengia, ki te taupatupatu rānei, engari he pai ake mō te hauora i te wā roa. 

Te pānui e pā ana: Me pēhea te aroha ki a koe anō i roto i te whanaungatanga - 21 Tohutohu Whaihua

7. Whakaharatau i te tiaki i a koe anō, me te haumi ki ētahi atu whanaungatanga

Ina aro nui koe ki tētahi tangata, ka ngāwari te wareware ki te toenga o te ao. Ki te hiahia koe ki te mutu te noho puku, kua tae ki te wā ki te whakarerekē i tēnā mā te whakawhānui i tō whatunga tautoko me te atawhai i a koe anō. Kia kaha ki te whakapau wā ki ngā hoa me te whānau e meinga ai koe kia whakaaro he mea nui koe. Mā te whakawhanake i ētahi atu whanaungatanga whai tikanga ka whakamahara koe kāore tō uara i herea ki taua tangata kotahi. 

Ka whakaratohia hoki he whakatutukitanga o te ngākau, kia kore ai koe e whakawhirinaki anake ki te whakamanatanga aroha. Haere ki waho mō taua pō kiriata me ō hoa, waea atu ki ō tuākana, tuākana, whanaunga rānei, noho tahi me te hunga e rite ana ō hiahia ki a kōrua. I a koe e hanga hou ana i ēnei hononga, ka noho pūmau koe, ka iti ake te aro ki ngā tauhohenga a taua tangata. I taua wā anō, kia rua ngā wā ka nui ake tō aro ki te tiaki-whaiaro ngā mahi o ia rā. Kei roto i tēnei ko, 

• Te whakarite i te 30 meneti ia rā hei mahi i tētahi mea e tino pārekareka ana ki a koe—te pānui pukapuka, te tākaro kēmu, te hikoi, te whakaaroaro
• Kaua e whakakorikori tinana kia ātaahua ai te titiro ki te aroaro o tetahi, engari kia kaha ai, kia māia ai hoki koe ki a koe anō
• Te pupuri i ngā tikanga moe pai
• Te whakapaipai i a koe anō me ngā kākahu hou, ngā mea hou rānei hei whakahari i tō wairua
• Te tuhi tuhipoka i o whakaaro 

Mā te nui o tō manaaki i a koe anō, me te taunekeneke ki ngā momo tāngata, ka iti ake tō hiahia me tō hiahia ki te aro o tētahi tangata. Hei painga anō, mā te oranga whānui ka ātaahua ake koe, ā, ka iti ake te tūponotanga ki te aro atu ki ngā mea wairangi. He māmā ake te kī "kāo" te haere atu rānei ina he oranga whai hua tōu hei whakawhirinakitanga.

8. Whakataa te wā mai i te whakaipoipo mēnā e tika ana

Mena kua waiho tō whanonga whakamāmā hei wāhanga o tētahi tauira, he mea whakaaro nui pea te pēhi i te pātene whakamutu i te whakaipoipo mō tētahi wā poto. Whakamahia tēnei wā whakatā hei tautuhi anō i tō huarahi ki ngā whanaungatanga. Arotahi katoa ki a koe anō, kaua e whakararuraru i te ngana ki te kukume i te aro o tētahi. Kāore tēnei e hiahiatia he oati whakaari mō te noho takakau, he aha atu rānei. Tērā pea ko te tikanga kia kaua e whai i tētahi mō ētahi marama i a koe e whakatinana ana i ngā huringa kua kōrerohia e tātou. 

I tēnei wā okiokinga, kia aro ki te āhua o te noho ko koe anake. Tērā pea he mea whakamā i te tīmatanga mēnā kua taunga koe ki te tango i te mana o tētahi atu, engari me noho noa. Tērā pea ka kitea e koe kei te pai koe – kei te harikoa hoki – i a koe anō, ina taunga koe ki tēnā. Ka whai wā koe ki te whakaaroaro ki tāu e tino hiahia ana i roto i tētahi hoa ina tīmata anō koe, me pēhea hoki te manaakitanga e hiahia ana koe kia manaakitia koe.

9. Awhitia te whanaungatanga, ā, tatari kia taurite te mahi tahi

Ka whai hua tēnei tohutohu i a koe e whakamahi ana i ngā mea o runga ake nei, ā, ka tīmata anō te taunekeneke aroha, i te mea rānei kei te haere tonu koe i roto i tō whanaungatanga o nāianei me ngā whakapainga. Me waiho te mahi tahi hei paerewa koura hou māu. Ko te tikanga tēnei ka hoatu, ka whakaatu hoki koe i te manaaki, engari e tumanako ana koe kia rite te utu. Ehara i te mea he utu iti, engari he taurite whānui. 

Ki te mea kua whakaaetia e koe ngā kongakonga i mua, ināianei ka tatari koe kia oti te keke katoa, ka haere atu rānei. Tērā pea ka rite koe ki te "pakaru" o te tangata, engari he tika tonu. E tika ana kia whiwhi koe i tētahi tangata hei tuku karere tuatahi ki a koe i ētahi wā, hei pātai atu mō tō rā, hei mahi atawhai i a koe me te kore koe e tono. Ina tīmata koe ki te wheako i ēnei whanonga tahi, ka miharo koe he aha koe i pai ai ki te iti iho. Ko te aroha whakaute, te aroha e rua ngā taha te rongoā mō te ngawari noa iho. 

FAQs

Thoughts Final

Ahakoa te āhua o te simping he meme, he kata noa iho rānei i runga ipurangi, e pā ana ki ngā tauira kare ā-roto me ngā mahanga tūturu i roto i ngā whanaungatanga. Mena kua kitea e koe ētahi o ēnei whanonga i roto i a koe, kaua e whakahe i a koe anō. He tokomaha o tātou, i tētahi wā, kua nui rawa atu te whai i te aroha, i te whakaae rānei. Ko te mea nui ko tāu e mahi ai i muri mai. Mā te mārama ki te tikanga o te simping, te kite wawe i ngā tohu, me te hanga i ngā huringa mohio, ka taea e koe te arahi i a koe anō ki ngā taunekeneke hauora ake.

Kia maumahara, kāore he he o te atawhai, te atawhai, te manaaki hohonu rānei i tētahi. He āhuatanga whakamiharo ēnā. Ko te take me te āhua o tō whakapuakitanga i aua āhuatanga te mea nui. Me whakaara ake te aroha i ngā tāngata e rua, kaua e waiho tetahi kia karakia ki ngā waewae o tētahi. Hei whakamutunga, ko te oranga me te aroha he mea e pā ana ki te kimi taurite. E hiahia ana koe kia taea te hoatu noa i te aroha, engari kia whiwhi hoki i taua aroha. E hiahia ana koe ki te manaaki i ētahi atu, engari kia manaaki hoki i a koe anō. 

Ehara te whāinga i te whakapakeke i tō ngākau, i te tākaro rānei i ngā kēmu mana; engari ko te aroha me te kore e ngaro i a koe anō. Ina tutuki i a koe tēnā, ka miharo koe he aha koe i whakaae ai ki tētahi mea iti iho i tēnā. Nō reira, kia atawhai, kia aroha, kia "pono" ki te tangata. Kaua e wareware ki te tuku i taua atawhai me te aroha ki te tangata e tino hiahia ana ki tēnā: ko koe anō.

Kitea tō uara: 13 Ngā Huarahi hei Whakaaetia e Arohaina ana, e Maiohatia ana hoki

11 Ngā Tohu o ngā Whanoke Whakaute-Iho i roto i te Hononga

8 Ngā Wehi Noa i roto i ngā Hononga - Ngā Tohutohu a ngā Tohunga hei Whakakore

Kāore tō koha e kiia he kaupapa aroha takohaMā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata katoa o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

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