Kutuluka Kuchipinda: Nkhani 4 za Gay Akutuluka

Kutuluka ngati gay sikophweka. Simudziwa zomwe muyenera kuyembekezera - makolo anu adzakhumudwa kwambiri, abwenzi anu adzakusangalatsani, kapena mudzakupezererani kapena kukuchitirani nthabwala ndi anzanu a m'kalasi kapena antchito anzanu.

Komanso, m’malo molonjezedwa ndi mgwirizano ndi chikondi, munthu amayang’anizana ndi mafunso odabwitsa amene alibe ulemu uliwonse. Mafunso okhudza kugonana, kugonana, ndi nkhani zina zosokoneza zomwe ifeyo sitinaganizirepo. Ndipo ngati tatero, si ntchito ya wina aliyense!

Nkhani zambiri zomwe zikutuluka sizikuyenda bwino momwe munthu angayembekezere. Kutuluka mu chipinda ndi chinthu chachikulu kwa ife payekha. Timatsala pang'ono kuchitenga ngati kubadwanso ndi njira yodzipezera tokha. Koma, momwe timafotokozera nkhani zathu ndi zaumwini, ndipo pali njira zambiri zomwe timasankha kungoyika phazi lathu ndikuchita momwe tingathere.

Momwe Mungatulukire Ngati Gay

Kutuluka nthawi zonse kwakhala njira yodziwitsa ena za kugonana kwanu. Zachidziwikire, simutuluka ngati mukuwongoka chifukwa ndi "zabwinobwino", mawu osavuta omwe ambiri amagwiritsa ntchito. Kutuluka m'chipindacho, kumbali ina, ndi chinthu chaumwini kwambiri kwa anthu ochokera kumagulu a queer.

Sikuti nthawi zonse zimakhala ngati kuchita zinthu mokakamiza, koma ngati kuuza ena zimenezo. Munthu akanena kuti ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi, zimene akunena n’zakuti, “Inde, ndine munthu wachilendo ndipo palibe vuto kukhala choncho”. Munthu amene akufotokoza sayenera kumva kuti ndi wosasangalala, koma sizili choncho kwa ambiri amene amafotokoza mobwerezabwereza ndipo amakumana ndi mavuto aakulu. Ambiri a ife timayankhanso nkhani zabodza komanso malingaliro olakwika okhudza anthu ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha zomwe zimatipangitsa kukhumudwa kwambiri.

Ndamva nkhani zambiri za momwe ndingatulukire kuchipinda ndipo pali zingapo zomwe ndikufuna kugawana pano. Werengani nkhani ndi maakaunti otsatirawa, zonenedwa m'mawu a munthuyo, ndipo mwina mumvetsetsa momwe zimakhalira kuyenda pa mphindi yayikulu ngati iyi.

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Monga vlogger, ndidagwiritsa ntchito YouTube kuti ndituluke

Poyamba ndinali munthu wamanyazi ndipo ndinkakonda kukambirana za mafilimu ndi anthu amene sankandiganizira. Koma ndinkasungulumwa, ndipo nthaŵi zonse ndinkafuna kulankhula za mafilimu. Chifukwa chake, ndidayamba kupanga makanema pa YouTube omwe amawona bwino ndipo mafani amandikonda ndikamalankhula zamakanema, kapena zovuta zonse.

Sindinakhalepo ndi chifukwa chilichonse chofotokozera momveka bwino, chifukwa sindinaganizepo kuti ndikofunikira kuti ndichite zimenezo. Ndinakhala moyo wanga momwe ndimafunira ndipo unandipatsa malo okwanira kwa ine ndi luso langa. Kusowa kwa kulankhulana pakati pa ine ndi dziko lakunja nthawi zonse kunkabweretsa zopinga ndipo ndinayamba kuphunzira njira zowonetsera bwino. Ndinaphunzira kuti kuwonetsa bwino zinthu kungandithandize kukhala wolimba mtima. Ndinkadziwa kuti ndiyenera kukhala woona mtima kwa ine ndekha komanso kwa dziko lapansi.

Imodzi mwa njira zomwe ndimaganiza kuti nditha kutuluka, inali pa YouTube. Ndinajambula kanema ndikukonza zonse ndekha. Poyamba zinkandiona ngati zopusa ndipo ndinkada nkhawa. Kenako ndinapanga mndandanda woulutsira mawu ndikutumiza ulalo wavidiyoyo kwa anzanga ndi abale anga. Ndipo zina zonse ndi mbiriyakale.

Ndinalengeza kudzera pa ulalo wabulogu pa Facebook

Ndimakonda kulemba mabulogu ndipo ndakhala wowerenga mwachangu. Blog yanga imakonda kukamba za mabuku ndi mafilimu kapena nyimbo. Ndinali wodziwa chikhalidwe cha pop mwanjira imeneyo. Ndinkakonda anyamata ndipo sindinaganizepo kuti chinali chinthu chachikulu chomwe chiyenera "kubisika". Ndinakonza njira yopezera makolo anga ndi anzanga.

Ndinalemba kalata yotseguka pa blog yanga ndikuyika ulalo pa tsamba langa la Facebook. Ndinaitana anzanga kuti awerenge. Kulandila kunali kolimbikitsa, koma zinalibe kanthu. Sindinkafuna kutsimikizira, kungonena zomwe ziyenera kunenedwa.

Zinali zovuta kale kukhala m'dera losasinthika ndipo ndinayenera kuyika phazi langa pansi. Ndinatero ndipo ndine wokondwa nazo. Ndimakonda anzanga ndipo nawonso amandikonda. Ndine wokondwa kuti ndatuluka chonchi. Kodi mungabwere bwanji kwa makolo anu, mukudabwa? Siyani pa intaneti.

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Ndinali ndi maganizo oipa kwambiri pamene ndinatuluka

Lingaliro la atsikana okonda atsikana lasinthidwa ndi amuna mpaka kuganiza kuti kugonana kuli ngati T-shirt yomwe ingakhoze kuvala ndi kuchotsedwa malinga ndi momwe mukufunira. Ndinkadziwa kuti ndidzakhala wokhumudwa kwambiri ngati nditatuluka ngati mkazi wachiwerewere. Kukhala msungwana ndikovuta kale, ndipo tsopano ndi mkazi wopusa?!

Kuyambira ndili mwana, ndinali ndi nkhawa ndi lingaliro la momwe ndingadziwire ngati ndinu gay. Ndinali nditamva zambiri za amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kusukulu ndipo nthawi zonse ndinkafuna kudziwa zambiri za iwo. Kuyambira ndili ndi zaka 13, ndinkadziwa kuti ndine wosiyana koma sindinkadziwa momwe ndingachitire. Kwa zaka zambiri ndinayamba kuvomereza kugonana kwanga nditachita chibwenzi chabwino ndi chibwenzi changa ndipo ndinali kulimbana ndi momwe ndingalankhulire ndi anzanu komanso abale anu.

Sindinadzidalire kuti ndichite, koma ndidachitabe. Ndinapanga post yaitali pa Facebook ndipo ndinatuluka poyera. Aliyense, banja langa mpaka anzanga, anayamba kuyankhapo. Ndinalandiranso mafoni. Mayi anga anayamba kundilalatira chifukwa anali osokonezeka kwambiri, koma ndinadzikoka ndi mkuntho woipa uja.

Ndinali wopanduka ndipo sindinapatutsidwe konse kwa yemwe ndinali. Ndinachita zimene ndinamva ndipo sindinanong’oneze bondo. Panopa zinthu zakhala zosavuta, koma kutuluka kunali kovuta kuti tiphwanye. Ndine gay ndipo ndikudziwa kuti zili bwino. Ndazindikira kuti ngati mukuganiza momwe mungatulukire ngati gay, palibe njira yolondola kapena yolakwika. Ena adzaweruza ndipo ena avomereza ndipo muyenera kukhala nawo onse awiri.

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Chifukwa chiyani ndimakonda kwambiri banja langa

Ndimakonda banja langa ndipo nthawi zonse tinkakambirana zonse momasuka. Kuyambira ndale mpaka nkhani za jenda, timalankhula zambiri. Ndipo sindinkaona kuti anthu a m’banja lathu amadana ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Kotero, ndinaganiza kuti ndifunse banja langa kuti lidye chakudya chamadzulo ndi kuwatengera malo abwino.

Sizinali cholinga chokhacho, chifukwa ndimaganiza kuti ndi njira imodzi yopangira zinthu zoti ndiuze makolo anga ndipo ndimafuna kuchita zimenezo. Ndinatero pamene woperekera zakudya anasiya kutumikira ndipo banja langa linayankha kuti, “Tikudziwa”, ndipo tonse tinaseka kwambiri. “Tadziwa kuyambira pamene unali mu giredi yachinayi, nthawi zonse zinali zoonekeratu,” anatero amayi anga.

Ndinali ndi nthawi yabwino tsiku limenelo ndipo ndine wokondwa kukhala ndi banja ngati limenelo.

Imeneyi inali imodzi mwa nkhani zopepuka za anthu anayiwa, ndipo tikukhulupirira kuti zidakupatsani chiyembekezo komanso chiyembekezo paulendo wanu.

Mukatuluka ngati gay, ziribe kanthu zomwe muyenera kukumana nazo, ikadali nthawi ya epiphanic yomwe imakupangitsani kumva ngati katundu wachoka pamapewa anu. Anthu amene amakukondani amayesetsa kukumvetsani zivute zitani. Ndipo iwo omwe samakupezani, ndiye vuto lawo!

Momwe mungatulukire m'chipindamo ndi mtedza wovuta kusweka, koma zidzachitika mwanjira ina. Ndiwe yemwe uli, chifukwa, “Mwana, unabadwa chonchi!”

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