21 Kusiyana Pakati pa Chikondi ndi Kutengeka

Kodi pali kusiyana kotani pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima? Anthu ena amaganiza kuti pali mzere wabwino pakati pa kutengeka mtima ndi chikondi, ndipo nthawi zambiri, anthu amakonda kusakaniza ziwirizi. Koma zili choncho chifukwa kutengeka maganizo kumakuchititsani misala, mungaganize kuti ndi chikondi. Tsoka ilo, mwina si zoona. Awiriwa ndi osiyana kwambiri ndi momwe mukuganizira. Zomwe mukuganiza kuti ndi chikondi, zitha kungokhala lingaliro lachikondi lomwe mwakopeka nalo. Pankhondo ya kutengeka mtima ndi chikondi, mumadziwa liti lomwe muli?

Palibe kutsutsa mfundo yakuti nkovuta kusiyanitsa pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka maganizo kapena kumvetsetsa kusiyana kwa chikondi ndi kukopa. Ngati mwangotsutsana ndi mawu akulu omwe tagwiritsa ntchito, musadandaule, tikukuphwanyani.

21 Kusiyana Pakati pa Chikondi ndi Kutengeka

Nthawi zambiri takhala tikumvera chisoni munthu wina moti timaona kuti timamukonda kwambiri. Pali kuthamangira uku ndi chikhumbo champhamvu kuchokera mkati chomwe chimakupangitsani kufuna kukhala ndi munthu ameneyo pafupifupi nthawi zonse. Ndi nthawi zachangu izi pomwe timalephera kumvetsetsa kusiyana kwa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima.

Timalakwitsa maganizo amenewo kukhala chikondi, koma zoona zake n’zakuti ndi kukopa chabe kumene kumaoneka mokulirapo kwa ife. Uku ndi kutengeka mtima komwe kumabwera mobisa zomwe zimawoneka ngati chikondi. Chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima zimayamba mofanana - koma kutengeka mtima kumakonda kukhala kwakanthawi chikondi nchosatha.

Nthawi zina achinyamata, ngakhale akuluakulu, amasokonezeka akapenda mmene akumvera chifukwa amalephera kusiyanitsa chikondi ndi kutengeka maganizo. Kodi inunso zinthu ngati zimenezi zachitika kwa inu? Kodi zinakuvutaninso kusiyanitsa pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima?

Palibe kanthu. Sipanachedwe kuzindikira momwe mumamvera kapena momwe mumamvera ndi munthu m'mbuyomu. Werengani zizindikiro 21 izi kuti mudziwe kusiyana kwa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima. Ngati mwasokonezedwa kwamuyaya ndikulakalaka chikondi, titha kukuwonetsani njira yoyenera yomvetsetsa chomwe chikondi chili. Timakuuzani zomwe kutengeka mtima kumakuchitirani komanso momwe chikondi chimasiyana.

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1. Kutengeka maganizo nthawi zonse

Kutengeka mtima kumakupatsirani kutengeka maganizo kotereku mukakhala ndi kapena mulibe. Pali agulugufe akuwuluka paliponse m'mimba mwako. Nthawi zambiri mumamaliza kuchita mopusa mozungulira kuphwanya kwanu. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti ndinu wopusa, kungoti mwasangalala kwambiri. Ndipo zimenezi siziyenera kukhala zoipa kwambiri. Ungodziwa kuti si chikondi. Ngati mukuona kuti m’pofunika kuwasangalatsa nthaŵi zonse kapena kudzionetsera m’njira yosonkhanitsa anthu, kumeneko kungakhale kungotengeka maganizo.

Koma chikondi, chimachepetsa malingaliro amenewo ndi kukupatsani lingaliro lachisungiko ndi kukwanira. Pamene maganizo ofulumirawo akhazika pansi ndipo inu mumamvabe chimodzimodzi, ndicho chikondi m’lingaliro lake lenileni.

2. Kulamulira zochita zanu

Mukatengeka maganizo, zosankha zanu zimachokera ku ubongo. Zonse ndi zabwino ndi zoyipa kwa inu. Mukuwona ngati bizinesi - kufunafuna phindu lomwe mungapeze. Kusiyana kwakukulu pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima n’chakuti kutengeka mtima kumakupatsani kuganiza moyenerera ngakhale sitepe ndi sitepe. Kupatula pamene mahomoni amatenga mphamvu!

Koma chikondi sichimatsatira malamulowo ngakhale pang’ono. Zosankha ndi zochita mu chikondi zimayendetsedwa ndi mtima ndi malingaliro. Mumaganizira za wokondedwa wanu poyamba musanapange chisankho ndikuyika zosowa zake pamwamba pa zanu. Sizokhudza kupeza phindu koma kukondweretsa mnzanu ndikuyesera kukhala a bwenzi labwino nokha.

3. Kutengeka mtima sikukhalitsa

Kusiyana kwakukulu pakati pa chikondi ndi kukopeka kapena kutengeka mtima n'chakuti kutengeka maganizo nthawi zambiri kumakhala kosakhalitsa. Kutengeka maganizo sikukhalitsa chifukwa si chenicheni. Mukuganiza kuti mukukulitsa kumverera komwe kungangokhala kukopa kwambiri. Chikokachi chikhoza kukugonjetsani tsopano ndikukupangitsani kumva ngati simukuwona china chilichonse, koma dziwani kuti ndipamwamba kwakanthawi.

Mukadutsa gawo laukwati, mudzazindikira kuti malingaliro onsewa apita. Kutengeka mtima kumatha posachedwa. Chikondi chimakhala ndi chizolowezi chokhala nthawi yayitali, chimakhazikika pa kugwirizana kwakukulu kwamalingaliro ndi thupi. Kodi chikondi chimamva bwanji? Mumaona kuti ndinu wofunika komanso wosamalidwa.

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4. Mumafunitsitsa nthawi zonse

Mukatengeka mtima, kuleza mtima sikuli koyenera. Muli ndi kusimidwa uku ndipo mukufuna kuti zonse ziyende mwachangu. Ndiko kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima; ukakopeka umayenda mwachangu kwambiri. Simudziwana bwino ndi munthuyo ndipo mumangofuna kupita patsogolo chifukwa chachangu. Apa ndi pamene kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima kungasonyeze mbali yomwe muli nayo.

Chikondi chimakhala chapang'onopang'ono chomwe chimaphatikizapo kudziwana bwino. kupanga mgwirizano ndikudzimva kukhala wotetezeka. Mutha kupulumuka maubwenzi apatali mukakhala m'chikondi mosavuta chifukwa kulumikizana kwanu kumatha kupulumuka nthawi zovuta kwambiri. Mgwirizano ndi mgwirizano wamalingaliro ndizofunikira kwambiri kuposa china chilichonse.

5. Sipanapite nthawi yaitali choncho

Kodi padutsa masiku angati kuchokera pamene mwamudziwa munthuyu: sabata, mwezi kapena chaka? Sipanadutse ngakhale mwezi mutawadziwa ndipo mukulonjeza kale kuti mudzakhalabe m'chikondi chachikondi mpaka kalekale. Zonse zomwe mukudziwa, ndi zokopa chabe zomwe zimakupangani misala. Palinso kusiyana kochepa pakati pa kukopeka ndi kutengeka mtima. Kutengeka mtima kwenikweni ndi kukopeka kwambiri komwe kungakupangitseni kuchita chipwirikiti chifukwa chakuti mumasokonezeka kwamuyaya ndipo mumafunitsitsa kukondedwa.

Chifukwa chake, zindikirani kuti uku ndikulankhula kwanu mwachikondi. Kutengeka maganizo kumangokupangitsani kuti muyambe kukondana ndi lingaliro la munthu kapena lingaliro la chikondi. Mukamudziwa munthu mokwanira kuti adutse zabwino ndi zoyipa, ndipamene mumakondana. Mpaka pamenepo, ndi lingaliro chabe la chikondi lomwe mukukakamira.

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6. Chilombo chobiriwira chansanje

Pankhondo ya kutengeka mtima ndi chikondi, nsanje imakhala ndi gawo lofunikira. Maziko a ubale wanu sanakhazikike ndipo malingaliro monga kukhulupirirana ndi kumvetsetsa akusowa. Popanda zimenezo, chikondi si chenicheni.

Inu choncho chita nsanje mosavuta, chifukwa mbali ina ya inu mukudziwa kuti maziko a ubale wanu ndi ozikidwa pa kutengeka maganizo ndipo mukhoza kusinthidwa mosavuta pamene chikondi chenicheni chimabwera pa chithunzi. Koma m’chikondi chenicheni mumadzimva kukhala wosungika, ndipo nsanje sizichitika mwachipewa. Komanso sizimakupangitsani kukhala ndi nkhawa kapena kuda nkhawa nthawi zonse.

7. Palibe kulumikizana kozama

Kupatula kukopa kwakuthupi, palibe mgwirizano wina womwe mumagawana ndi munthu uyu. Kulumikizana kwanu ndi iwo kumangotengera mawonekedwe ake akuthupi ndi mikhalidwe yawo yokonda chuma. Taganizirani izi. N’chiyani chinakupangitsani kuti muwagwere? Kodi ndi chithumwa chawo chonse kapena momwe amalankhulira za maloto awo?

Chikondi ndi pamene mukumva kugwirizana kwakukulu uku ndikugawana mgwirizano wamphamvu umene uli pamwamba pa mitundu yonse ya kukopa. Palibe kukaikira zimenezo kuyanjana kwa kugonana ndi kiyi pakupanga ubale koma si chinthu chokhacho chofunikira ngati chili chikondi. Ndiko kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kukopa.

8. Kudzipereka, koma kwa inu nokha

Kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kukopa kumakhala koonekeratu pamene wina akuganizira za kudzipereka muubwenzi wanu. Mukakopeka kapena kukopeka, chinthu chokhacho chomwe mumadzipereka ndi malingaliro anu, malingaliro anu ndi inu nokha. Ndi a ubale wodzikonda chifukwa palibe 'ife' okhudzidwa.

Chikondi chimafuna kudzipereka kwa inu nokha ndi mnzanu, zomwe zimabwera pakapita nthawi chifukwa cha kuleza mtima, kudzipereka ndi kumvetsetsa. Chikondi ndi kudzipereka muubwenzi chifukwa mumayika patsogolo ubale wanu ndi wokondedwa wanu.

9. Zonse ndi zachiphamaso

Kutengeka mtima n’kopanda pake komanso kukondetsa chuma. Mumakopeka ndi makhalidwe onse okonda chuma ndipo mumadutsa zinthu zofunika kwambiri. Ndipo padzakhala nthawi zomwe mudzaziwonanso. Ngati zili zokhuza kupita kokadya chakudya chamadzulo ndipo osakhala kunyumba mumasewera anu a PJs, kuwonera kanema ndikungosangalala nazo zonse - zitha kukhala kutengeka mtima.

Chikondi sichimakukopani kuti mukhale ndi mnzanu wosamalira kwambiri. Zonse ndi za munthu amene ali mkati mwake. Iwo sangakhale owoneka bwino, mwina alibe ndalama, sangakhale opambana kwambiri, koma mudzawakonda ku mwezi ndi kubwerera. Mudzakhala okondwa nthawi zonse kuzipinda m'manja mwawo ndikuwonera kanema yemweyo womwe mudawona nawo nthawi chikwi. Kumeneko ndiko kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima.

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10. Zonyenga ndi zopanda malire

Kutengeka mtima kumakupangitsani kuti muyambe kukondana ndi lingaliro la chikondi osati m'chikondi chenicheni. Zimapanga lingaliro langwiro la momwe zongopeka zanu zingawonekere. Zikumveka zosokoneza, tikudziwa, koma timvereni. Nthawi zina, simumangotengeka ndi munthuyo koma kukhala wosokonezeka kwamuyaya komanso wofunitsitsa chikondi kumakupangitsani kuganiza kuti ngakhale chisangalalo chochepa chochokera kwa wina chingakhale chikondi.

Koma ngakhale zitakhala zabwino bwanji, n’zotheka kuti si chikondi chenicheni. Chikondi n'chopanda malire ndipo chingakhale chopanda ungwiro. Kukonda wina popanda chifukwa podutsa zolakwa zonsezo ndi momwe zimakhalira.

11. Chikondi kapena chilakolako?

Ganizilani izi mosamala. Kodi kumverera kwakukulu komwe kumayendetsa malingaliro anu ndi chiyani? Ndi chilakolako kapena chikondi? Malingaliro okhazikika omwe mumakhala nawo kwa mnzanuyo amakuuzani zomwe mumamumvera. Ichi chikhoza kukhala chinthu chomwe chimawululira kwa inu kusiyana kwakukulu pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima.

Ngati nthawi zonse mumaganiza zogonana za mnzanuyo, ndiye kuti ndikulankhula kukopa. Ngati inu kumva chitonthozo ukamuwona mnzako, udziwe kuti ndi chikondi. Kukopa sikumangokhalira kugonana. Kusiyana kwa chikondi ndi kukopa kumakhudzanso momwe mumasangalalira nawo ngakhale simuli pabedi.

12. Zochita zenizeni

Mukatengeka mtima, mumangokopeka ndi zomwe zili kunja. Simumva ngati kudziwa munthu weniweni mkati. Simumayesetsa kuwafunsa mundidziwe mafunso kapena amasamaladi za zikumbukiro zawo zaubwana kapena zomwe zimawapangitsa kukhala momwe alili.

Chikondi ndi pamene mumadziwa zolakwa ndi zofooka za munthu weniweni ndipo simumva kusiyana kulikonse za iye. Ndicho chimene mgwirizano weniweni umakhudza. Ndipo simudzasiya chikondi chimenecho zivute zitani.

13. Kusamvana kochepa pakati panu awiri

M’kutengeka maganizo, simulankhulana kwenikweni, chifukwa nonse mumathera nthawi yambiri mukuganizirana. Mumalankhulana koma zachisoni, mumalankhulananso. Chifukwa ndinu otengeka kwambiri komanso okondwa, kulumikizana kwanu sikufika pakumvetsetsa kozama.

Kuyankhulana kwa njira ziwiri kumathandiza kuti pakhale mgwirizano pakati pa awiriwa kuti mumve kugwirizana kozama, zomwe zimachitika m'chikondi. Mumaganizira kwambiri za kuyankhulana ndi wokondedwa wanu kusiyana ndi kumuganizira.

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14. Kudzipereka

Kutengeka kwanu sikudzafuna kuti mupereke nsembe kwa wokondedwa wanu. Ndi chifukwa chakuti ena mwa inu akudziwa kuti malingaliro anu sali amphamvu mokwanira kuti muchite zimenezo. Simukufuna kudumpha chifukwa mukudziwa kuti sizoyenera. Ngati akusamukira ku London, simungaganizire n'komwe kusamukira nawo, ngati ndinu wotengeka. Chifukwa chake, ngati mukufunadi kudziwa kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima, dzipatseni malingaliro ongoyerekeza ndipo muwona.

Chikondi n'chosiyana. Chikondi chimakupangitsani kupereka nsembe zopanda malire kwa wina ndi mzake popanda kuganiza kawiri. Ndinu okonzeka kupanga zosagwirizana mukakhala m'chikondi koma mumadziwa nthawi osati kunyengerera. Sizikupanga kukhala wotsatira wakhungu koma munthu wofuna kukonza zinthu.

15. Kuchuluka kwa malingaliro

Kutengeka maganizo kumakuchititsani kutengeka maganizo kwambiri, koma kutengeka maganizo kumeneku kumangokhudza thupi la munthuyo. Zikafika ku malingaliro akuya, pali kusowa komwe mukumva. Chikondi ndi champhamvu m'mbali zonse. Mumamva kulimba uku mumalingaliro ndi kumvetsetsa. Mumakhulupirira munthu uyu ndipo mumamukonda, mosasamala kanthu za thupi lake.

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16. Zoyembekeza zosayembekezereka

Ubale wamtundu uliwonse umabwera ndi ziyembekezo koma kukakhala kutengeka mtima ziyembekezo zimakhala zochulukira. Munthu akakopeka amayembekezera kuti mnzakeyo amupeza mwezi. Ndi chifukwa chakuti amafuna kuti chikondi chikhale choyipa kwambiri, adzachita chilichonse kuti adzimve ngati momwe ziliri. Ngakhale, mosadziwa amadziwa kuti sichoncho.

M'malo mwake, ngati munthu ali m'chikondi chenicheni akadakhala nacho ziyembekezo zenizeni kuchokera pachibwenzi osati kuvutitsa wokondedwa wawo kuti asakwaniritse zomwe amayembekeza. Ndiko kusiyana pakati pa kukopeka ndi chikondi.

17. Kutengeka mtima kumakupangitsani kubwezera

Mukakopeka ndi munthu wina ndipo chibwenzicho chikutha, mumangoganizira za momwe mungabwezere, momwe mungamupweteketse kapena pamapeto pake mutha kumuchitira chipongwe. Uku ndiye kusiyana kwenikweni pakati pa chikondi ndi kukopa. Chikondi sichimakukwiyitsani kapena kukukwiyitsani.

Ngati mukuyesera kutero pezani munthu amene mumamukonda kwambiri, kubwezera kungakhale chinthu chomaliza m’maganizo mwanu. Chikhoza kukhala chikondi chenicheni koma sizinayende pazifukwa zina. Simungathe kudana ndi munthuyo ndi mtima wanu wonse.

18. Ubale siwosalala

Kusiyana kwa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima n’kwakuti pamene kuli kutengeka maganizo, ubwenziwo umalimba ndi mikangano imene imawonongetsa ubwenziwo. Padzakhala zovuta za ego ndipo kuyambira pachiyambi, zinthu zikhala mwala.

Kuti musiyanitse pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka maganizo, ganizirani zopinga zonse zimene zili muubwenzi wanu ndi kumene nkhanizi zimayambira. Mukagwa m’chikondi chenicheni mumangosangalala kukhalapo kwa wina ndi mnzake ndikuyesera kusonyeza chikondi ndi kuganizirana m’malo momangokhalira kunena maganizo anu.

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19. Simuli wotsimikiza

Kodi mumawona makhalidwe a mnzanu wapamtima mwa munthu amene muli naye pachibwenzi? Mwayi umakhala ngati muli wotengeka simudzatsimikiza. Nthawi zonse mumamva kuti mwina mnzanu akusowa kanthu, mwina mungapeze wina wabwino.

Pankhani ya chikondi, zomwe mungafune kuchita ndikukhala ndi tsogolo ndi bwenzi lanu ndipo osakayikira. Ndiko kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kukopa.

20. Zinthu zazikulu ndi zofunika

Wakupezani maluwa. Chongani! Iye amakupatsirani mphatso pafupipafupi. Chongani! Amavala bwino. Chongani! Amakutengerani kumafilimu, amakugulirani chakudya chamadzulo, amakupangirani ndalama zatchuthi. Ndipo mumamva kuti ndinu opambana-zidendene m'chikondi.

Koma bwanji ngati angakonde kuonera filimu ndi inu mutakhala pampando kumapeto kwa sabata? Osayiwala kukuthokozani kapena kukuphikirani namondwe? Kodi mungachitcha chikondi chimenecho? Chabwino, pamene chiri chikondi, tinthu tating'onoting'ono timafunika.

21. Umakhala wosasamala

Muli kumverera kosalekeza mkati kuti zinthu zabwino sizikhalitsa. N’chifukwa chake mumaona kuti ndinu wosasamala. Mutha kugonana popanda chitetezo kapena kukhala ndi nthawi yambiri ndi mnzanu ndikunyalanyaza zosowa zanu zantchito.

Koma chikakhala chikondi anthu amatenga sitepe imodzi ndi imodzi. Amasamala za chitetezo cha mnzawo ndipo sangachite chilichonse chowavulaza. Ndi momwe anthu okondana pangani chikhulupiriro.

Psychology ya aliyense pankhani ya chikondi imasiyana, motero ambiri amalakwitsa kutengera chikondi. Ngakhale kuti maganizo a munthu angasiyane, zomwe sizisintha ndi momwe mumamvera za munthuyo. Yang'anani nthawi zonse zamalonda enieni ndipo mudzapeza yankho ngati muli muzongopeka zotchedwa kutengeka kapena pafupi ndi zenizeni za chikondi.

Chikondi chingakhalepo kapena sichingakhalepo mpaka kalekale, koma mukudziwa mmene kutengeka maganizo kumathereratu. Ganizirani mfundo izi ndipo dziwani motsimikiza ngati muli m'chikondi kapena mukungotengeka maganizo, kuganiza kuti ndi chikondi. Posachedwapa mumvetsetsa kusiyana pakati pa chikondi ndi kutengeka mtima, ndi mbali iti ya sikelo yomwe mungakhalepo!

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