Malangizo 10 Oletsa Kukonda Winawake Koma Khalani Anzanu

Chikondi ndi mphamvu yamphamvu. Zimapangitsa dziko lanu kuzungulira. Zimadzutsa mzimu wanu. Chofunika kwambiri, zimakupangitsani kukhala munthu wabwino. Chikondi chingakhale kumverera kokongola pamene chikhalitsa koma chikhoza kubweretsanso kupweteka kwake ndi kusweka mtima. Ngati mukufuna kudziwa kusiya kukonda munthu koma kukhala naye paubwenzi, mwayi mukudziwa kale zimene tikukamba. 

Ubwenzi wanu ukhoza kutha koma mwina munasiyana bwino ndipo mwaganiza zokhala mabwenzi. Monga okhwima monga momwemo, kugwera mkati ndi kunja kwa chikondi sikuchitika ndi kukankha batani. Ukamakondana ndi munthu, chilichonse chomwe amachita chimawoneka chosangalatsa komanso chosangalatsa. 

Kukhala ndi mabwenzi pamene mumafuna zambiri kungakhale kovuta kwambiri chifukwa simungasiye kuwalakalaka. Umawalakalaka ngati mwana amalakalaka shuga. Kulakalaka kumeneku kumatha kukhala kovutitsa m'matumbo koma mutha kudutsamo pophunzira kusiya kukonda munthu koma kukhala naye paubwenzi. Tabwera kukuthandizani kuti muchite chimodzimodzi. 

Malangizo 10 Oletsa Kukonda Winawake Koma Khalani Anzanu

Atafunsidwa pa Reddit ngati mungathe kukhalabe paubwenzi ndi munthu amene mumamukonda, wogwiritsa ntchito wina anafotokoza zomwe adakumana nazo. Wogwiritsa ntchitoyo anati, "Ndili ndi bisexual ndipo ndimakonda mtsikana amene anali bwenzi labwino. Ndinamufunsa ngati akufuna kupita naye pachibwenzi nthawi ina. Anamaliza kunena kuti ayi koma ndife mabwenzi abwino mpaka lero. Choncho yang'anani motere, ngati ndi bwenzi labwino, mutha kupitiriza kukhala mabwenzi ngakhale atakana."

Kunena zoona, sizikhala zophweka koma potsirizira pake mudzafika poti mudzakhala paubwenzi ndi iwo osawakonda. Pakhoza kukhala zifukwa zingapo zomwe mukuyang'ana njira zosiya kukonda munthu koma kukhala paubwenzi ndi inu nokha monga:

• Chikondi chosayenerera kwa bwenzi 
• Iwo ali kale paubwenzi ndi munthu wina
• Ndiwowopsa ngati bwenzi koma bwenzi labwino
• Sanachoke paubwenzi wawo wakale 
• Mukufuna zinthu zosiyanasiyana (Mwachitsanzo: mukufuna kudzipereka ndipo akufunafuna zinazake)

Pali zifukwa zosiyanasiyana zomwe anthu awiri sangakhale pamodzi. Kaya pali chifukwa chotani, zingakhale zopweteka kusiya kumvera munthu wina amene simungakhale naye. M'munsimu muli malangizo oti musiye kukonda munthu koma mukhale naye pa ubwenzi:

1. Kuvomereza ndiye chinsinsi 

Ichi ndi sitepe yoyamba kuti mukhale paubwenzi ndi munthu amene mumamukonda. Ndichomwe chili. Simungathe kuwakakamiza kuti akukondeni. Simungakakamizenso kusiya kuwakonda. Muyenera kuvomereza zenizeni. Musamaganize kuti chifukwa chakuti simunagwetse munthu wina chifukwa cha inu ndiye kuti mwalephera nokha kapena chinachake chikusoweka mwa inu. 

Kusiya maganizo oterowo kukhala m’mutu mwanu kumangoyambitsa kusadzidalira ndi kudzidetsa. Zomwe muyenera kuchita ndikumvetsetsa zinthu zingapo: 

• Awa si mapeto a dziko
• Ubwenzi wanu wachikondi watha 
• Moyo ndi wovuta kwa aliyense
• Nthawi zina zinthu sizikuyenda bwino

Palibe malongosoledwe osintha moyo kapena chifukwa chake. Sizikuyenda bwino. Iwo samakukondani inu. Yesetsani kumvetsa ndi kuvomereza zinthu mmene zilili. Tengani nthawi yanu kuti mugwirizane ndi izi musanafutukule nthambi ya azitona yaubwenzi kwa munthu amene mumamukonda koma simungakhale naye. 

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2. Ganizirani mmene mukumvera 

Ukakonda munthu ndipo samakukondanso, kutengeka mtima kochuluka kumakugunda nthawi imodzi. Mtima wako wasweka. Mwakhumudwa. Mumaganiza kuti simuli woyenera kukondedwa ndi iwo, ndichifukwa chake sakumva chimodzimodzi kwa inu. Simukudziwa ngati muthamangitse munthu uyu kapena kumusiya. Mumamva ngakhale manyazi poulula chikondi chanu kwa iwo.

Unikani ndikufufuza mozama momwe mukumvera ndikugwiritsa ntchito njira zothanirana nazo. Ngati simukudziwa momwe mungathanirane ndi chikondi chosabwezera ndipo ngati zimenezo zikukhudza thanzi lanu la maganizo, gulu la akatswiri odziwa bwino ntchito za Bonobology lingakuthandizeni kudziwa momwe mungathanirane ndi malingaliro anu moyenera.

3. Perekani wina ndi mzake malo pang'ono 

Simungakhale okondana kenako n’kudumphanso kukhala mabwenzi. Kusintha kumeneko sikungachitike mwadzidzidzi. Muyenera kulimbana ndi malingaliro osathetsedwa kotero kuti musapitirire kunamizira kuti muli paubwenzi ndi munthu amene mumam’konda koma mungamange naye ubwenzi weniweni. 

Dave, yemwe ali ndi zaka za m’ma 30, yemwe ndi wophunzira wa utsogoleri, anati: “Ine ndi mnzanga wakale tinaganiza zokhalabe mabwenzi chifukwa timaganizirabe wina ndi mnzake.

4. Osataya zinyalala za iwo

Kukanidwa kungakhale kowawa. Zili ngati moyo ukukuvutitsani kwambiri. Simungathe kunyalanyaza. Thandizani ndi kukanidwa mwanzeru. Musamanene mawu onyoza komanso onyoza za munthu winayo, makamaka ngati mukufuna kukhalabe naye paubwenzi. Mukalankhula zoipa za munthu wina chifukwa cha nkhanza, zimawonetsa khalidwe lanu kuposa lake. Musamafufuze momwe mungabwezerere kwa wakale wanu ndikuyesera kumuvulaza. Nazi njira zina zomwe mungathanirane ndi kukanidwa:

• Musati muganizire mopambanitsa izo
• Vomerezani kuti kukanidwa ndi gawo la moyo
• Osadziimba mlandu 
• Musaope kukanidwa kapena kudziyika nokha kunja uko
• Ganizirani kwambiri za makhalidwe anu abwino 

Pamene tinafunsa pa Reddit momwe mungalekere kukonda munthu amene simungakhale naye, wogwiritsa ntchito wina anati, “Musamanyoze nkhani zake makamaka ngati muli ndi anzanu omwewo. Musabweretse anzanu m’mavuto. Musamapangitse gulu la anzanu kukhala vuto kuti simupita kuphwando ngati iye akufuna kupita. Ingosangalalani ndi nkhani yonseyi ndipo sonyezani ulemu wanu wakale mwa kusadandaula za vutolo.”

5. Lekani kulota za iwo 

Ili ndi yankho limodzi lofunika kwambiri la momwe mungasiye kukonda munthu koma kukhala naye paubwenzi. Muyenera kusiya kuwalota. Izi ndi zomwe ndimachita nthawi zambiri ndikayamba kukondana ndi mnzanga ku koleji. Sindinaleke kulota za ife.

Ndinkaganiza kuti tidzakhala ndi nyumba m'mphepete mwa nyanja, kuyenda maulendo ataliatali pamphepete mwa nyanja, ndipo ndinaganiza zokhala ndi amphaka atatu nditasamukira limodzi. Ndinakhumudwa pamene sanandibwezere maganizo anga. Kuposa kukanidwa, kunali kutayika kwa dziko lopeka limeneli kumene kunandiika m’zowawa zambiri. Ngati mukufuna kutaya malingaliro a munthu wina koma mukukhalabe naye paubwenzi, muyenera kusiya kulota za iye. 

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6. Lolani malingaliro anu akulimbikitseni 

Kuchita ndi mfundo yakuti munali okonzeka kupereka chikondi chanu chonse kwa munthu wina koma munthuyo sankafuna kungakhale kovutitsa maganizo komanso kovutitsa. Pamene wokondedwa wangayo sanandibwezere maganizo anga, ndinkawagwiritsa ntchito bwino. M’malo mongodzida ndekha, ndinatembenukira ku luso la zaluso. 

Chikondi chimene muli nacho pa iwo chidzakusonkhezerani kuchita zinthu zabwino kwenikweni m’moyo. Ndikhulupirireni, ndikanena izi, ndakatulo yanga yoyamba ndi zotsatira za chikondi chosayenerera. Sindinayang'anenso mmbuyo kuyambira pamenepo. Sindingasinthe zoti ndimamukonda ndipo sanandikondenso koma ndapeza luso ngati njira imodzi yothanirana nazo. 

7. Phunzirani kudzikonda

Ngati mukufunsa momwe mungasiyire kukonda munthu wina koma nkukhalabe mabwenzi, ndiye kuti muyenera kuphunzira momwe mungadzikondere kwambiri. Khalani ndi nthawi yambiri yoti "ine" ndikuphunzira kudzikonda nokha. Muyenera kudziona kuti ndinu ofunika kwambiri kuposa china chilichonse. Muyenera kuika zosowa zanu patsogolo pa za ena. Nazi njira zina zomwe mungadzipangire kudzikonda:

• Dzikhulupirireni nokha kuti mukhala bwino
• Ikani nokha poyamba
• Gonjetsani maganizo oipa 
• Tsatirani zokonda zakale 
• Zolimbitsa thupi; pitani ku masewera olimbitsa thupi kapena masewera olimbitsa thupi kunyumba
• Dzichepetseni nokha 
• Sungani zolemba zanu 

8. Muziika patsogolo mbali zina za moyo wanu 

Kudziyerekezera kukhala paubwenzi ndi munthu amene mumam’konda kungakhale kutopa. Mutha kusokoneza nthawi iliyonse yomwe muli nawo. Mutha kusokoneza ndikuvomereza kuti mumawakondabe. Mukhozanso kuwapsyopsyona. Ndi bwino kuti panthawiyi muyang'ane mbali zina za moyo wanu. Perekani nthawi yochuluka kwa banja lanu. Pitani mukakumane ndi anzanu. Yang'anani pakupanga ntchito yanu. 

Ndinafunsa mnzanga, Moira, yemwe ali ndi ubale wabwino ndi wakale wake, malangizo achinsinsi oti asiye kukonda munthu amene sakukondaninso koma kukhala naye paubwenzi. Iye anati, “Sindinasiye ubale naye chifukwa tinaganiza zokhalabe mabwenzi. Ndinangosiya kupereka nthawi yanga yonse kwa iye. Ndinayang'ana kwambiri kuyambitsa bizinesi yanga. Tsopano timakumana nthawi ndi nthawi ndipo palibe kukhumudwa kapena manyazi. Ndikusangalala kuti sitinathetse ubwenzi wathu kwathunthu.”

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9. Ikani malire omveka bwino 

Ngati mukufuna kudziwa kusiya kukonda munthu koma kukhala naye paubwenzi, ndiye kuti muyenera kukhazikitsa malire omveka bwino. Pansipa pali ena mwa malire omwe mungajambule mukakhalabe anzanu mukafuna zambiri ndi wina:

• Pewani kukopana nawo
• Ngati simudzidalira, ndiye kuti nthawi zonse muzikumana pagulu
• Osalumikizana nawo. Zikungopangitsa kuti zinthu zikhale zovuta kwa nonsenu
• Pangani zokumbukira zatsopano monga mabwenzi

10. Chibwenzi ndi anthu ena 

Ngati muli pachibwenzi ndi anthu ena kuti muwachitire nsanje, ndiye kuti ndi lingaliro loipa. Koma ngati muli pachibwenzi chifukwa mwakonzeka kulola wina watsopano m'moyo wanu, ndiye kuti ndi chinthu chabwino. Ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zomwe mukuzigonjetsa. Osachita nsanje ngati ali pachibwenzi ndi munthu winanso. Zidzakhala zosavuta kukhala nawo paubwenzi ngati nonse mwasamuka. Sizili ngati simungakhale paubwenzi ndi munthu amene munayamba naye chibwenzi. Mutha kukhala mabwenzi bola ngati mulibe negativity. 

Ponena za momwe mungasiyire kukonda munthu wina ndikukhalabe naye paubwenzi, wogwiritsa ntchito Reddit adagawana, "Pitirizani ndi moyo wanu wachikondi. Chitani chibwenzi ndi munthu wina. Koma kuthetsa ubwenzi ndi munthu amene mumamukonda kwambiri n'kosiyana kwambiri komanso kovuta pokhapokha ngati simunali mabwenzi enieni poyamba. Ngati munali mabwenzi abwino kuyambira kale, ndiye kuti mutha kupitiriza kukhala choncho mwa kuvomereza mkhalidwewo ndikulankhulana bwino."

Zidzakhala zodabwitsa komanso zovuta pamene mukunamizira kukhala paubwenzi ndi munthu amene mumamukonda. Koma mukangosiya kuwakonda, mudzasangalala kuti simunalekeretu ubale wanu. Siyani mkwiyo ndikuyang'ana pa zabwino zanu. 

Ibibazo

Companionship Vs Ubale - The 10 Basic Differences

Momwe Mungachokere Kuti Akufuneni - Masitepe 15

Njira 9 Zaukatswiri Zothana Ndi Amuna Omwe Amayenda Mothamanga Kwambiri Paubwenzi

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.

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