Amandisunga Bwanji Ngati Sakufuna Chibwenzi?

Kodi muli pachibwenzi ndi mwamuna yemwe mukumukayikira kuti si zonse zomwe mudadzipereka kwa inu? Kodi munayamba mwadzifunsapo kuti, "N'chifukwa chiyani amandisunga ngati sakufuna chibwenzi?" Akhoza kukuuzani kale kuti sakufuna kudzipereka kwa inu, komabe amacheza nanu mwachikondi. Akhoza kukuuzani, ndipo nthawi zina amakuwonetsani, kuti amakukondani moona mtima. Zochita zake zimakuchititsani kudabwa kuti akumva bwanji. 

Mwinamwake amakupangitsani kumva ngati yo-yo, akukukanizani kutali ndi kukukokeraninso mkati. Chifukwa cha mauthenga osalekeza osalekeza omwe mnyamatayu amatumiza, mungamve ngati mukuchita misala nthawi zina. "N'chifukwa chiyani amandisiya ngati sakufuna chibwenzi?" mukudabwa, komabe. Tiyeni tione mmene maganizo ake amagwirira ntchito.

Chifukwa Chiyani Amandisunga Pozungulira Ngati Sakufuna Ubale - Zifukwa 17 Zomwe Zingatheke

Mwachita pafupifupi chilichonse chimene okwatirana “okhwima” amachita. Mwayenda limodzi, mwakumana ndi mabwenzi a wina ndi mnzake, ndipo mwina mwakumananso ndi mabanja a wina ndi mnzake. Ngakhale zili choncho, mumakhalabe mumkhalidwe wovuta pakati pa chibwenzi ndi chibwenzi. Ngakhale pali zifukwa zambiri zomwe mwamuna angasonyeze kuti ali ndi chidwi kenako mwadzidzidzi n’kusiya chibwenzi, nthawi zambiri zimagwera m’magulu awiri: a) Zingakhale zokhudza iye, b) Zingakhale zomwe mukuchita. Kuphunzira kusiyanitsa pakati pa ziwirizi kudzakupulumutsani kusweka mtima kwambiri mtsogolo, osati ndi munthu uyu yekha, komanso ndi anthu ena onse omwe mudzakhala nawo pachibwenzi.

1. Amangofuna kugonana ndi inu

Ndi chifukwa chopusa komanso choopsa, koma apa pali chifukwa. Kukhala pachibwenzi koyambirira kwa chibwenzi sikolakwika, koma kungasokoneze kusiyana pakati pa chibwenzi chosakhazikika ndi chachikulu. Malinga ndi kafukufuku wina, ngati ndinu mkazi, ndi zoona kuti mumatha kuona chisangalalo chakuthupi ngati chizindikiro chakuti ali ndi chikondi champhamvu pa inu. Komabe, m'maganizo mwake, akhoza kungosangalala, akudzaza nsapato zake.

Nanga n’cifukwa ciani anasiya zosangalatsa za mtundu umenewu n’kukhala mbeta n’kukakamizika kukhala yekha usiku? Amakukondani koma sakufuna chibwenzi, ndiye ngati mukufuna kupeza mayankho kuchokera kwa iye, choyamba muyenera kuchotsa kugonana pa equation. Akazindikira kuti ndinu wotsimikiza za lamulo losagonana, adzatha kuzindikira mwadzidzidzi kukhulupirika kwake. Ayenera kusankha ngati ndi kugonana kokha komwe kumamulimbikitsa kuti apitirize kukupachika kapena ngati amakukondani.

2. Safuna kukhala wosungulumwa 

Ndi chibadwa cha anthu kufuna kukondedwa komanso kukhala ndi anthu amene amakukondani. N'zotheka kuti mwamuna sadziwa zomwe akufuna kwa inu, koma sakufuna kukhala yekha - kotero amakusungani pafupi kwa masiku amenewo aatali komanso osungulumwa. Koma kumbukirani, malingaliro ake akunja kwa inu sadzasintha. Ngati nonse muli pachibwenzi , mwina mukukhala nthawi yambiri limodzi. Ngati zimenezo zitatha, iye adzasiyidwa yekha ndi maganizo ake. Ngakhale anthu ena amakula bwino paokha ndipo amatuluka okha, ena sadzakhala otere.

Iye ndi mtundu wa munthu amene nthawi zonse amafuna kukhala ndi kampani, kaya ndi kupita ku mafilimu kapena kukadya chakudya chamadzulo, kapena ngakhale kumapeto kwa sabata. Akhoza kumangocheza nanu ndikukutsogolerani kuti nthawi zonse azikhala ndi wina womupangitsa kumva bwino kuti akhale mbeta. Simukufuna kukhala mthunzi wake chifukwa ndicho chinthu chapafupi kwambiri ndi ubale womwe angakupatseni. 

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3. Adzatopa ngati mulibe

Mofananamo, ngakhale kuti ali wosazama kwenikweni, angakhale akungoyesa kupeŵa kunyong’onyeka. Mukakhala pachibwenzi, mumakonda kupita kocheza komanso kumacheza ndi wina ndi mnzake. Pali chifukwa pamene anthu ayamba chibwenzi ndi munthu watsopano, amakonda kutaya maubwenzi awo.

Ngati akufuna kupita ku bar yatsopano kapena kuwonera kanema watsopano, koma palibe abwenzi ake omwe alipo, mwina amayembekezera kuti mudzakhalapo ndikukhala nanu. Akakulolani kuti mupite, sadzakhalanso ndi wocheza naye, zomwe, ngakhale zimveka zomvetsa chisoni, mwina chifukwa chake chokhalira ndi inu mozungulira ngakhale kuti alibe zolinga zachikondi.

4. Safuna kuti mukhale ndi wina aliyense

Amuna akhoza kukhala olamulira. Amafuna zomwe akuganiza kuti ndi zawo, kotero kuti sakufuna inu koma safuna kuti wina aliyense akhale nanu. Inu, monga munthu, simuli ake. Alibe chonena pamtima panu ngati sakufuna kuyambitsa ubale ndi inu. 

Komabe, kuganiza kuti muli ndi munthu wina kungamuopseze. Muonetseni kuti muli ndi zosankha zina kupatula iyeyo, ndipo muuzeni kuti ngati sakufuna kudzipereka, wina adzachita zimenezo. Ngati sakufunadi chibwenzi , mwina adzachita nsanje - koma osasintha maganizo ake. Kapena choipa kwambiri, adzanamizira kuti ali pachibwenzi ndi inu kuti akulepheretseni kuonera anyamata ena. Nazi zambiri zokhudza mwamuna ngati uyu:

• Amayamikira chidwi chanu ndi kudzipereka kwanu kwa iye, choncho amafuna kuti mupitirizebe kumutsatira
• Kukopa kwanu kwa iye kumakulitsa kudzikonda kwake
• Amakana kuvomereza kuti sakuyang'ana chibwenzi chodzipereka ndipo akupitiriza kulonjeza zopanda pake za tsogolo lanu limodzi.
• Sakufuna kuti muchokepo kuchokera kwa iye

5. Akuwopa kuthana ndi seweroli

Ngakhale mutakhala pachibwenzi kwakanthawi kochepa, kulekana kungakhale kovuta komanso kodabwitsa. Ngati simumva chimodzimodzi ndi mnzanuyo, adzakhumudwa. Pali mwayi kuti sakufuna kukhala wokhwima ndikukuuzani zoona, chifukwa sakufuna kuthana ndi zotsatira zake. 

Kutengera ndi komwe mudakumana, pakhoza kukhala zotsatira zina pakuthetsa chibwenzi chanu zomwe wakhala akuyesera kupewa. Mwachitsanzo, ngati mukugwira ntchito kapena kutenga makalasi limodzi, angaope kuti kukhala pafupi kudzakhala kovuta komanso kosasangalatsa ngati atakusiyani. Pezani njira zomudziwitsira kuti muli bwino ngati sakuona chikondichi chikupita patsogolo ndipo simudzamubweretsera mavuto ngati mutakumananso.

6. Safuna kukuvutitsani

Mwina tiyenera kumupatsa mwayi wokayika ndikuwona kuti ndi munthu wabwino yemwe safuna kukuwonani mukupweteka akathetsa ubale womwe ukukula. Kuthetsa ubale waukulu kumakhala kovuta kwa wolandirayo, mosakayika, koma ndizovuta kwa wodutsitsa chifukwa amayenera kuthana ndi kukhala woipayo. Tikukhulupirira kuti palibe amene angasangalale kuuza wina yemwe samamumvera mwamphamvu monga momwe mnzakeyo amayembekezera.

Angachedwetse zomwe sizingachitike chifukwa sakufuna kukuvutitsani podziwa kuti sakufuna, makamaka ngati mwamulankhula zoona zenizeni za momwe mukumvera. Ngakhale kuti akadali wamantha posanena zoona, zolinga zake ndi zabwino chifukwa amasamala za inu.

• Ndikwabwino kuchita izi mwachangu, monga kung'amba chothandizira, kwa nonse
• Onetsetsani kuti akudziwa kuti ndinu amphamvu ndipo akhoza kuthana ndi chilichonse chomwe anganene
• M’malo momulola kuti apitirize kunama kuti nonse awiri musangalale, muuzeni za ubwino wochita zinthu moona mtima.

7. Safuna kukutayani ngati bwenzi

Kuyesera kuyenda paubwenzi wachikondi womwe unakula kuchokera kwa abwenzi apamtima kungakhale kovuta, koma ndizotheka. Anthu ambiri amene amacheza nawo moyo wawo wonse anayamba ngati mabwenzi chabe, koma ubwenzi ungathenso kutha chifukwa cholephera kuupanga kukhala pachibwenzi. Ngati ubale wanu unayamba chifukwa chaubwenzi waukulu, akhoza kukhala akukusungani mozungulira ngakhale kuti alibe chikhumbo chofuna chibwenzi chifukwa sakufuna kukutayani ngati bwenzi. Akhozanso kukusungani pafupi ngati ali ndi chibwenzi.

Tonse takumana ndi zovuta kuti tipitirize moyo wathu titasiya chibwenzi . Kudziwa kuti munthu mmodzi adzadabwa ndipo adzamva kupweteka pomwe winayo adzaoneka wodzidalira, kungakhale kovuta kupirira. Kubwerera ku ubwenzi wamba mutathetsa chibwenzi n'kosavuta ngati munali mu siteji yoyamba ya chibwenzi. Kupanda kutero, zimakhala zovuta. Koma ubwenzi wanu ukhoza kumangidwanso pakapita nthawi ndipo pamapeto pake udzabwerera m'malo mwake.

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8. Safuna kusiya kulamulira moyo wanu 

Kulingalira kungakhale koopsa kwambiri nthawi zina ngati ali woteteza mopambanitsa. Angafune kukusungani pafupi kuti azikhala nthawi zonse. Chimodzi mwa zinthu zovuta kwambiri za kutha mwadzidzidzi kuchotsedwa ku moyo wakale wanu, kumene inu munali maganizo okhudzidwa, ndi ziro njira yodziwira zimene iwo ali panonso. 

Popeza kutsata anthu pa malo ochezera a pa Intaneti kumangokuthandizani kuti musamavutike, anthu ena amasankha kukusungani ngakhale kuti alibe malingaliro enieni. Ngati zili choncho, sakulemekezani monga munthu wamphamvu, ndipo muyenera kudzidula nokha.

• Iye amawopa kwambiri kuti angakutaye chifukwa ndiye kuti sangathe kulamulira moyo wako
• Safuna kuti muzisankha nokha zochita
• Iye sakonda zosankha zimene mumapanga pa umoyo wanu
• Nthawi zonse amakhala wowongolera pang'ono ndipo amakhumudwa mukamachita "ufulu"

10. Amakusungani mozungulira momwe amafunira kuti Mulipire zinthu

Ndi lingaliro loipa koma lofala kwambiri kuposa momwe mungaganizire. Ngati mwamuna wanu ali mumkhalidwe wovuta, wopanda ntchito, komanso wosochera m'moyo, angakupangitseni kuti mupitirize ndikukana kukusiyani chifukwa ndinu wothandizira ndalama zake. Malinga ndi kafukufuku wina , kulinganiza bwino ndikofunikira paubwenzi wabwino. Ngati nonse mukupeza ndalama, simuyenera kudikira kuti mwamunayo alipire - koma zingakhale bwino ngati achita gawo lake popanda inu kumudziwitsa.

• Ngati akuwoneka kuti akukunyozani, ndiye kuti ndi chifukwa chakuti watero
• Kodi akupereka kulipira yekha kuzindikira kuti waiwala chikwama chake, kukusiyani kuphimba mtengo wanu madeti?
• Kodi mumamupeza akulipira bilu m'malo mwa inu? 
• Mwina nthawi zonse amakhala pamalo anu nthawi ya chakudya chamasana kapena amadziitanira ku chakudya chamadzulo? Zingakhale chifukwa chakuti muli ndi chakudya koma iye sangakwanitse, kapena ndi zodula kwambiri kugula zake
• Akhozanso kufika kwa inu n’kukupemphani kuti mum’pezere ndalama zoti zimuthandize
• Ngati iye amakulolani amathera pa iye ndi masiku anu zonse, iye akhoza atapachikidwa wanu zosagwira ntchito zachikondi, kuti asunge ndalama

10. Akufuna kusunga zosankha zake

Anyamata ena sali okonzeka kukhazikika, koma akudziwa kuti amakukondani. Ngati mwapeza mbeta oyenerera amene ntchito moyo ndi kukumana latsopano angathe tsiku usiku uliwonse, n'zosadabwitsa kuti iye kupewa kutenga ubwenzi wanu mlingo wotsatira.

Malinga ndi kafukufuku wina , amuna anali ndi mwayi waukulu wosonyeza kuti ndi osakwatira kuti akhale omasuka kukopana, komanso chifukwa chakuti sankakonda kupanga banja. Mukakhala pachibwenzi chosavuta , mumakhala mukucheza ndi anthu ena ndipo mumakhala okondana komanso osasamala momwe mukufunira. Kukhala choncho ndi kwachibadwa kwa ena, ndipo ndi njira yokhayo imene mwamuna wanu amadziwira momwe angakhalire.

• Amasangalala ndi chidwi komanso kudzikonda komwe kumabwera ndi chidwi cha anthu angapo nthawi imodzi, ndipo kudzipereka kwa inu kungatanthauze kusiya moyo umenewo.
• Iye ali ndi chidwi kwambiri ndi chibwenzi wamba osati ubwenzi wodzipereka
• Amakusungani pamzere kotero kuti ali ndi inu ngati imodzi mwa zosankha zake

11. Amasangalala ndi ubwino wa 'ubale'.

Ndikudziwa kuti mumaganizapo chifukwa nthawi zonse ndimakhala lingaliro langa loyamba ndikakumana ndi zomwezi. Akhoza kukusungani pafupi chifukwa amakolola ubwino wokhala pachibwenzi popanda kugwiritsa ntchito mphamvu zaubwenzi. Ndi njira yosavuta yopezera zosowa zake popanda kuchita zomwe sakufuna kuchita: kudzipereka. 

Sakuona izi ngati vuto. Ngati muli ndi malingaliro pa iye ndipo mukufuna kuti ubale wanu upite patsogolo kufika pamlingo wodzipereka, fotokozani zosowa zanu. Ngati wanena momveka bwino kuti sakufuna zoposa pamenepo, muyenera kuvomereza m'malo momuyesa kumutsimikizira kuti mungakhale mnzanu wabwino kwambiri. Mutha kuthetsa naye zinthu ngati sangathe kukwaniritsa zosowa zanu zakuthupi ndi zamaganizo.

Zina mwazofunikira zomwe amakwaniritsa kudzera mu 'ubale'wu zitha kukhala:

• Amasangalala ndi kugonana ndi inu ndipo safuna kusiya
• Sanadzipereke kwa inu, koma amapindula kwambiri ndi inu. Ndiwe womuchiritsa popanda malipiro
• Iye amangobwerabe kwa inu chifukwa ali wotsimikiza kuti amulandira bwino. Ngati akufuna kuti ego yake ikhale yovomerezeka nthawi zonse, muuzeni kuti atenge galu
• Amakonda kudzitamandira kwa abwenzi ake ndikuwauza zonse za "bwenzi" lake - ndinu chizindikiro kwa iye.

12. Akufunika njira yosunga zobwezeretsera ali kumunda

Anthu ena safuna kukhala pachibwenzi chimodzi. Amakonda kusunga zosankha zawo potsegula. Mwina anakuwonjezerani pamndandanda wake wosunga zosunga zobwezeretsera ngati ena omwe angakhale ogwirizana nawo sangayende bwino. Sakuchita chilichonse cholakwika mwaukadaulo ngati ali wowona mtima ndipo ubale wapakati panu ndi wopanda kudzipereka. Koma ngati akudziwa kuti mukufuna chibwenzi ndipo mukudziwa kuti sakufuna, nonse simudziwa mavuto omwe mumadzibweretsera nokha.

Kapena izi zitha kukhala nkhani ya vuto linalake. Mitundu ina ya mavuto ingakule kukhala ubale wathunthu, koma ambiri satha bwino. Simungamukakamize kuti afune chibwenzi, ndipo simuyenera kuvomereza kukhala njira yobwezera. Ngakhale simungathe kumulamulira, mutha kusankha momwe mungathanirane ndi vutoli. Kodi mupitilizabe kudziwa kuti mukupeza zochepa kuposa zomwe mukuyenera? Kapena muchoka ngakhale muli ndi malingaliro?

13. Iye ndi wosatetezeka ndipo amafuna kudzikweza

Ngakhale anthu owoneka bwino komanso opambana angakhale osatetezeka ngati muyang'ana zizindikiro. Iye amakusungani inu pafupi chifukwa amadyetsa ego wake. Mumamupangitsa kudzimva kukhala wofunidwa, kusamaliridwa, ndi kuyamikiridwa. Mwinanso munganyalanyaze zolakwa zake chifukwa chakuti mumamukonda, ndipo amayamikira. Nkwachibadwa kwa iye kufuna kumva bwino, koma kodi zikukupangitsani inu kuipidwa ndi ubwenzi wanu ndi inu mwini?

Izi ndi zinthu zomwe mwamuna akhoza kukhala wosatetezeka nazo:

• Iye ndi womasuka kukuwonetsani zolakwa zake ndi mantha, koma osati kwa munthu wina aliyense momwe amawopa kunyozedwa chifukwa cha iwo
• Iye amakhala womasuka kuchita chinthu chosokonekera pamaso panu, koma amakhala wosatetezeka pochiwonetsa kwa wina
• Saganiza kuti ndi wokondeka ndipo amaganiza kuti palibe munthu wina amene angamukonde momwe mumamukondera, chifukwa chake amakusungani m'moyo wake.

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14. Akugwiritsa ntchito ubale wanu kuti achire kuchokera pakutha kwake posachedwa

Awa ndi mapiritsi ovuta kumeza. Akali kunena za ex wake? Kodi akamalankhula za munthu ameneyu amakhalabe wamtima? Ngakhale atakhala ngati amamunyoza, ichi ndi chizindikiro chabe chakuti samuposa. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti akufuna kuyatsanso motowo. Nthawi zina amangofunika kuchira kuti asakhumudwe kapena kukwiya chifukwa cha chibwenzicho komanso mmene chinathera. Koma izi zimagwiranso ntchito ngati sanasamuke kwa wakale wake.

Kumbali ina, mwina mwaona kamvekedwe ka mawu ake pamene akunena kuti angabwerere kwa iye mosangalala ngati atapatsidwa mwayi. Mwina iye anali "yemweyo" ndipo akuoneka kuti sangathe kupirira. Kodi mukufuna kukhala wachiwiri kwa munthu amene amamukonda? Angakusungeni pafupi chifukwa amakukondani ndipo amakhulupirira kuti tsiku lina adzakhala wokonzeka kudzipereka kwa inu, koma pakadali pano, akuyang'anabe pa wakale. Kodi mwakonzeka kudikira ndi chiyembekezo chakuti malingaliro ake asintha?

15. Sakhulupirira kuti muli “kwa iye”

Uyu amaluma. Angasangalale kukhala nanu moona mtima. Akhoza kuganiza kuti mupanga ubale wabwino kwambiri. Iye sakhulupirira kuti inu munapangidwira 'iye', komabe. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti pali chinachake cholakwika ndi inu. Chinachake chokhudza ubale sichikuwoneka ngati choyenera.

Ngati mukufuna kumvetsa bwino, dziwani kuti kusagwirizana sikutanthauza kuti nthawi zonse munthu amamva bwino. Mutha kudziwa ngati chinthu chili choyenera kwa inu, monga momwe mungadziwire ngati chinthucho chili cholakwika pang'ono kwa inu. Sizosangalatsa kukhala munthu amene sakufuna, pazifukwa zomwe simukuzimvetsa, koma tonse takhalapo. Yesetsani kukumbukira kuti si za inu, nonse awiri simukugwirizana . Ndipotu, si zoona kuti mtima umafuna zomwe mtima ukufuna?

16. Ndikochedwa kwambiri

N'zotheka kuti chibwenzicho chili msanga kwambiri kuti asinthe maganizo ake. Malinga ndi kafukufuku , zimatenga pafupifupi miyezi isanu ndi umodzi kuti anthu adziwe ngati munthu amene ali naye pachibwenzi ndi munthu wofunika kwambiri paukwati. Ngakhale mutakhala kuti mulibe mapulani okwatirana, izi zikusonyeza kuti zingamutengere miyezi ingapo kuti adziwe ngati chibwenzicho chili cholimba.

Ngati mwakhala pachibwenzi kwa mwezi umodzi kapena iwiri yokha, muyenera kuchepetsa zomwe mukuyembekezera. Munthu amene muli naye pachibwenzi mwina sangafune kukhala Facebook-official mpaka atatsimikiza kuti chibwenzicho chikhalitsa. Kupatula apo, palibe amene akufuna kusintha ubale wawo kuchoka paukwati kukhala 'waubwenzi' kangapo.

17. Amakusungani pafupi chifukwa simupita kulikonse

Chimodzi mwa zifukwa zomwe amakusungirani pafupi ndi chakuti angathe. Ndipotu, mumadziperekabe kwa iye. Nthawi zonse mumapita kukamuona ngakhale mutanena kuti muli otanganidwa. Amadziwa kuti angadalire kuti mudzakhalapo ngakhale kuti sakubwera kwa inu konse. Amachita izi chifukwa choti angathe — malinga ndi kafukufuku , ndi chibadwa cha anthu kulandira zomwe zaperekedwa mwaulere.

Mukuchitapo chiyani pankhaniyi? Kudikirira kuti asinthe malingaliro ake ndi chinthu chopanda pake, koma ndi chisankho chomwe mumapanga. Kodi mungamukwiyiredi chifukwa choti akukusungani pafupi pamene mukuchita chilichonse chimene mungathe kuti mumuthandize?

Musamataye nthawi pa munthu wina kupanga malingaliro ake za inu; muyenera kukuchitirani zabwino. Ngati sakuwoneka kuti akuyesetsa kwambiri ndi inu ndipo ngati sakuchita chilungamo pa zolinga zake, mwina alibe chidwi ndipo akungoyesa kukusungani chifukwa chimodzi kapena ziwiri mwazifukwa zomwe tazitchula pamwambapa. Ngati mwakonzeka lotsatira, siteji yokhazikika ya kugwirizana maganizo, muuzeni kuti mukufuna zambiri. Mloleni kuti asankhe, ndipo musadzimve liwongo potsazikana ngati sakukupatsani zomwe mukufunikira muubwenzi umenewu.

Ibibazo

Kukondana Ndi Bwenzi—Kodi Chotsatira?

Zizindikiro 17 Ndi Nthawi Yoti Musiye Kutsata Mtsikana Amene Mumakonda Ndikubwerera

Momwe Mungalekere Kukonda Munthu Amene Watengedwa - Malangizo 12 Oti Muwasiye Apite

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.

Onani Ndondomeko Yathu Yolembera

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