Kodi Ndinu Wokondedwa Woyimilira? Zizindikiro 15 Ndiwe Bwenzi Losunga

Mphamvu za chibwenzi zikukhala zovuta kwambiri ndi tsiku. Kuchokera pakuphwanyidwa kwa mkate mpaka kukomoka ndi kuyika benchi, zatsopano zimangokulirakulira mobwerezabwereza. Pomwe mumaganiza kuti mumamvetsetsa bwino zomwe zikuchitika m'dziko la chibwenzi, china chatsopano chimabwera. Chimodzi mwazinthu zotere zomwe zikuchita mozungulira ndi za ubale wa backburner. 

Malinga ndi phunziro, Ubale wamtunduwu ndi womwe chikondi chomwe chingatheke chimasungidwa ngati njira yosungira. Munthu amangokhalira kukakamira mnzakeyo koma sadzipereka kapena kuchita chibwenzi. Ubale woterewu ndi wopweteketsa mtima ndipo umasiya munthu yemwe akumulandirayo ali ngati chibwenzi kapena chibwenzi.

Ubale Kapena Zosunga Zosungira - Dziwani Kusiyana

Nthawi zambiri, mu maubwenzi awa, munthu m'modzi amadzipereka ndipo amafuna a mgwirizano wautali pamene winayo akungofuna nthawi kuti wina wabwino abwere. Pali zizindikiro zokwanira zovuta zaubwenzi ndi mbendera zofiira zomwe zimakuuzani kuti akungosewera ndi mtima wanu ndikukutsogolerani ngakhale palibe cholinga chopita patsogolo.

Kafukufuku yemweyo akusonyezanso kuti chizoloŵezi chimenechi chofuna kuyembekezera bwenzi latsopano, wabwinoko pamene kusunga mmodzi monga chosunga chosungira chimatengedwa ngati khalidwe lachibadwa pakati pa anthu. Vuto ndilakuti anthu ambiri amalephera kuzindikira kuti akuchitidwa ngati ndondomeko yosunga zobwezeretsera ndikukhazikika muubwenzi. Ngakhale atakhala kuti ali pachibwenzi, safuna kuvomereza zomwe zalembedwa pakhoma kapena kudzimva kuti sangathe kuchitapo kanthu.

Kodi Bwenzi Losunga Bwino Ndi Ndani?

Muyenera kumvetsetsa tanthauzo la wokonda zosunga zobwezeretsera m'lingaliro lenileni kuti muthe kuzindikira motsimikiza ngati mwapatulidwa ku gawolo. Chibwenzi chosunga zobwezeretsera ndi munthu amene amakhulupirira kuti ali paubwenzi wodzipereka, wokhazikika pomwe ali wokonda kuyimilira. Munthu ameneyu amachita ntchito za chibwenzi, popanda chitsimikizo chilichonse kuchokera kwa mtsikana yemwe ali naye pachibwenzi. Msungwanayo nayenso amamudalira ngati msampha woteteza ngati zinthu zina sizikuyenda bwino kapena osawona aliyense 'wabwino' m'chizimezime.

Kawirikawiri, bwenzi lothandizira ndilo quintessential munthu wabwino kukwatira kwa ndi amenenso amakondedwa ndi makolo a mtsikanayo. Angakhale wosaoneka bwino kwambiri komanso amakhala ndi moyo wosalira zambiri komanso ntchito yake, koma amafufuza zonse zofunika kuti apeze madalitso a m’banjamo. Mnyamata yemwe ali m'gulu la ndondomeko yosunga zobwezeretsera sangalimbikitse chisangalalo mwa mtsikana koma amabweretsadi lonjezo la bata. Chifukwa chake, nthawi zonse ndiye chisankho chomaliza. Komabe, wokonda kuyimilira amakhala ndi malingaliro enieni kwa mtsikanayo, zomwe zimamuika pamalo osatetezeka ndipo zimapatsa mtsikanayo mphamvu yoyendetsa maganizo ake momwe amakondera.

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Zizindikiro 15 Ndiwe Mapulani Ake Osunga Zosungira - Bwenzi Losunga

Kukhala ndi ndondomeko yosunga zobwezeretsera ndi chizindikiro chakukonzekera tsogolo labwino, kupatula ngati pali maubwenzi. Ubale wosunga zobwezeretsera ukhoza kusandulika kukhala chisokonezo chovuta kwambiri chomwe chimabweretsa zowawa zambiri komanso kusweka mtima kwa munthu yemwe wakhudzidwa mtima. Zingakhale zomvetsa chisoni kwa inu ngati mutapeza kuti mtsikana wanu ali kukusungani ngati zosunga zobwezeretsera konzekerani osati chofunika kwambiri.

Ngati mukuganiza ngati mtsikana aliyense ali ndi chibwenzi chothandizira kapena kudzifunsa kuti "Kodi ndine dongosolo lake losunga zobwezeretsera?" kapena “N’chifukwa chiyani akundichedwetsa?” Tiloleni kuti tikuthandizeni. Kuti muthe kuyimba foni ngati mukufuna kupitiliza kukhala wokonda kuyimilira kwa wina, choyamba muyenera kuunika momwe zinthu zilili bwino ndikuwona momwe mungadziwire ngati mtsikana akukugwiritsani ntchito ngati zosunga zobwezeretsera. Yambani poyang'ana izi 15 zizindikiro zomwe akuwona kuti mutha kukhala zosunga zobwezeretsera:

1. Mtsikanayo amapitiriza chibwenzicho mogwirizana ndi zofuna zake

Ngakhale amalankhula nanu ndikucheza nanu, samadzipereka kwathunthu kwa inu komanso amakhazikitsa malire ena mu ubale wanu zomwe muyenera kuzitsatira. Mwachitsanzo, akhoza kukuletsani kuyika zithunzi zanu nonse pamasamba anu ochezera a pa Intaneti kapena kuzengereza kuwonedwa ndi inu pagulu. Akhoza kukuuzani kuti musamamuimbire foni pokhapokha atanena kuti zili bwino. Simunachezepo - kapena kudziwitsidwa - abwenzi ake. Ngati muwona chitsanzo ichi muubwenzi wanu, yankho la 'kodi akundisunga monga chosungira?' zimawonekera.

2. Samakambirana za kudzipatula

Chimodzi mwazizindikiro zomwe amasunga zosankha zake ndi pamene sakukambirana nanu za kukhala nokha. Mumacheza wina ndi mzake, kupita ku mafilimu pamodzi, kudya chakudya chamasana ndi chakudya chamadzulo. Kuchokera ku maonekedwe ake, zikuwoneka ngati ubale wina uliwonse wamba koma palibe kudzipereka. Msungwana wanu amayesetsa kupeŵa kukambirana kulikonse pamutuwu. Ngakhale kuti ndi chibwenzi, sangavomereze kuwapatsa mwayi wodzipatula ndipo apitiliza kugwiritsa ntchito mapulogalamu azibwenzi komanso kukopana ndi amuna ena.

3. Amapewa ubwenzi wapamtima

Kupewa kukhala pachibwenzi kungakhale yankho limodzi ku funso lanu la "Kodi ndine dongosolo lake losunga zobwezeretsera". Ichi ndi chimodzi mwazizindikiro zazikulu kuti ndinu kusankha kwake kwachiwiri. Popeza zomwe muli nazo ndi ubale chabe, amapewa kukhala pachibwenzi ndi inu. Adzapewa kukhudzana ndi kugonana komanso kuti apite patsogolo zivute zitani. Izi zikutanthauza kusakhala ndi inu pamalo aumwini monga malo anu kapena ake, kapena kusapita kutchuthi ndi inu.

4. Amawoneka wosokonekera akakhala ndi inu

Kodi mukuwona kuti bwenzi lanu lasokonezedwa ndi inu? Kodi mukuona kuti alibe chidwi ndi zimene mukunena? Mukamamuuza mavuto anu, mwina amangowanyalanyaza m’malo mokupatsani malangizo kapena kukutonthozani. Kupatula apo, simumazindikira zofooka zake. Gawo labwino la nthawi yanu muli limodzi limathera ndi iye kuyang'ana foni yake kapena kukhala ndi chidwi ndi zozungulira kuposa inu. Ngati inde, mukuchita ndi chimodzi mwazozindikiro zomwe mungasankhe kwa iye osati munthu yemwe mumamukonda.

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5. Sapezekanso Loweruka ndi Lamlungu

Ichi chikhoza kukhala chimodzi mwa zizindikiro kuti ndinu njira kwa iye. Iwalani kukutengani nthawi mkati mwa sabata, alibe nthawi yoti mukhale nawe Loweruka ndi Lamlungu ndi tchuthi. Malingaliro anu oti mukumane kapena kucheze nawo amachotsedwa ndi chowiringula cha 'Ndili otanganidwa'. Muli ndi yankho la funso loti 'ndiye akundisunga ngati zosunga zobwezeretsera', ngati zolinga zake zonse zinali za abwenzi ake ndi anthu ena m'moyo wake ndipo simunatchulepo pamndandanda wake wazomwe zimafunikira.

6. Malo ake ochezera a pa Intaneti ali ndi vuto ndi anyamata ena

Mungakhale otsimikiza kuti muli mu ubale zosunga zobwezeretsera pamene osati palibe exclusivity komanso khamu la anyamata ena kupikisana nawo. Ngakhale iye si ozizira ndi zolemba zamasewera ponena za inu nonse, ma account ake ali ndi zithunzi ndi ma post ndi anyamata enawa. Izi zitha kutanthauza kuti ena m'moyo wake ndi gawo la mapulani ake osunga zobwezeretsera, kapena choyipitsitsa, ndizo zisankho zomwe akutsatira pomwe akukusungani ngati okonda kuyimilira. Zimapangitsa munthu kudzifunsa kuti, "Chifukwa chiyani akundisunga?"

7. Simunakumanepo ndi abwenzi ake apamtima

Ichi ndi chimodzi mwa nsonga zodziwikiratu za momwe mungadziwire ngati mtsikana akukugwiritsani ntchito ngati zosunga zobwezeretsera. Ndinu quintessential bwenzi losunga zobwezeretsera ngati amene mumamutcha mnzanu akuchita zonse zomwe angathe kuti atsimikizire kuti simukumana ndi abwenzi ake apamtima. Izi zili choncho chifukwa sakufuna kuti muziganiza kuti zinthu zikusintha kwambiri. Ngakhale mutaumirira, iye akhoza kupereka zifukwa zina kuti achoke.

8. Sagawana nanu zinthu

Kachiwiri chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zofunika kwambiri ndinu kusankha kwake kwachiwiri. Zomwe wachita, chisangalalo, mantha, nkhawa, zofooka - samagawana nanu zinthu izi. Nthawi zonse mumakhala ndi malingaliro ovutitsawa kuti ali kutali ndi inu ndipo simuli munthu wopita kwa iye. Izi ndi zina mwa zizindikiro zodziwika bwino zomwe akuwona kuti mutha kukhala zosunga zobwezeretsera. Atha kukhala akukumana ndi zovuta pazantchito kapena payekhapayekha, ndipo mudzazindikira pambuyo pa milungu ingapo m'malo mopanikizika nazo. Iye yekha akufuna chidwi chanu, osati inu.

9. Mtsikanayo sali wokhazikika muubwenzi

Chizindikiro china chaubwenzi wosunga zobwezeretsera ndikuti mnzanuyo sakhala wotanganidwa muubwenzi kapena inu chifukwa chakuti ndinu chisankho chake chachiwiri. Nthawi zambiri, mukakhala pachibwenzi ndi munthu, amakhala gawo lalikulu pa moyo wanu. Ngati sakuvutitsidwa ndi mtunda waubwenzi, ndi nthawi yowerenga zolembedwa pakhoma. Ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zizindikiro zodziwikiratu kuti ndinu mwayi kwa iye.

10. Komabe, sangapirire zoti mupite patsogolo

Mukayesa kuchoka muubwenzi wosakwaniritsidwawu ndikupita patsogolo, iye adzachitapo kanthu kuti atsimikizire kuti sizikuyenda bwino. Mudzamuona mwadzidzidzi kukhala wansanje ndi kudziteteza mopambanitsa . Ngati mumakondadi mtsikanayu, kuchita izi kungakhale kokwanira kusungunula mtima wanu ndikukupangitsani kukhalabe. Koma kumbukirani kuti akuchita izi chifukwa sakufuna kutaya chibwenzi chake komanso osati chifukwa amakukondani.

11. Kusemphana maganizo kulikonse kumabweretsa zinthu zochititsa chidwi

Nthawi zonse mukafuna kukambirana naye za khalidwe lake, nthawi zonse amalira komanso kuchita zinthu monyanyira. Ngakhale mutayesetsa kuthetsa chibwenzicho, iye adzagwiritsa ntchito chinyengo chilichonse cha m’bukuli kuti mupitirizebe kuchita zimene amati ndi ubwenzi. Ndi chifukwa chakuti akufuna kukumangani nthawi yayitali momwe angathere monga ndondomeko yake yosunga zobwezeretsera. Musalole kuti khalidweli likusokonezeni kapena kudzaza ndi mantha oti amutaya. Muyenera kudziwa zomwe akufuna kuchokera muubwenziwu chifukwa cha thanzi lanu komanso moyo wanu.

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12. Amabwerera mmbuyo pa mapulani mphindi yatha

Nthawi zonse mukakonza zochitira limodzi zinthu, nthawi zambiri amangokankhira pa mphindi yomaliza ngati pali chinachake chimene chikufunika kuti achitepo kanthu. Tiyerekeze kuti muli ndi a tsiku lachikondi anakonza koma anzake akupita kuphwando. Akuganiza kuti womalizayo adzakhala wosangalatsa kwambiri ndipo amaletsa mapulani ake ndi inu mosazengereza. Mwinamwake mwawononga ndalama zambiri ndi nthawi kukonzekera tsikuli koma iye sakuganizira zoyesayesa zanu.

Zachidziwikire, pali zochitika zina zapadera pomwe mapangano ena amakhala patsogolo kuposa moyo wathu wachikondi. Koma ngati khalidweli ndi lodziwika bwino, ndiye kuti simuli patsogolo. Mukangozindikira kuti ichi ndi chimodzi mwazizindikiro zodetsa nkhawa kuti akutsegula zosankha zake, zidzakhala zabwino kwa inu.

13. Kukhala naye pachibwenzi kumakhala kodula

Mukakhala bwenzi losunga zobwezeretsera, mudzakhalanso ngati ng'ombe ya ndalama yomwe imatha kukamidwa pakafunika. Ngati ali kumbuyo pa renti kapena sangakwanitse kugula nsapato zomwe akufunikira, adzabwera kwa inu kudzakupemphani kuti mumuthandize. Iye sadzapereka konse phula mu pamene inu muli pamodzi ndipo adzayembekezera inu kulipira mafilimu, chakudya chamadzulo, etc. Choncho, m'malo kumanga wabwino thupi ndi kulumikizana kwamaganizidwe ndi inu, cholinga chake ndi momwe angapindulire ndi ubalewu. Mwinamwake mukuganiza ngati mtsikana aliyense ali ndi chibwenzi chothandizira. Ngakhale izi sizowona, ndizotheka kuti dona wanu akukuchitirani ngati okondana.

14. Amakufanizirani ndi anyamata ena

Mtsikana amene akukulimbikitsani kuti akuthandizeni ngati ndondomeko yake yosunga zobwezeretsera mwina adzakufananitsani ndi anyamata ena m'moyo wake. Adzapitirizabe kupeza zolakwika mwa inu ndikugwiritsa ntchito zofooka zanu kukupangitsani kumva kuti ndinu osakwanira komanso ochepa. Mukamuphikira chinachake, adzakuuzani momwe bwenzi lake lapamtima limapangidwira bwino kwambiri. Ngati mupita naye kwinakwake, adzakuuzani momwe mnyamata wina anakonzera tsiku labwino kwambiri. Palibe chomwe ungachite chomwe chingakhale chabwino ndipo amakunyoza nthawi zonse.

15. M'matumbo anu amakuuzani kuti pali vuto

Kukhala naye m’moyo wanu sikudzakupangitsani kukhala osangalala komanso okhutira. Mumakhala ndi kumverera kosalekeza kosalekeza kuti chinachake sichili bwino, chinachake chikusowa mu ubale wanu ndipo izi zidzakupangitsani kukhala chibwenzi chosatetezeka. Ngati mukuona m'matumbo anu kuti ndinu basi kubwerera chibwenzi kwa iye, kuvomereza ndi kuyesa kukonza maphunziro kukumbukira zimene zili bwino kwa inu.

Zimapweteka ngati munthu, yemwe amatanthauza dziko kwa inu, sakubwezerani malingaliro anu. Zimakhala zowawa akamangokuganizirani ngati njira kapena wokondana yemwe angabwerereko ngati sapeza wina 'wabwino' kuposa inu. Koma, kumbukirani, ziribe kanthu kuti mumamukonda bwanji kapena zimapweteka bwanji kukhala dongosolo lake losunga zobwezeretsera, kukhalabe muubwenzi wotero sikuli chinthu chabwino kuchita.

Zomwe Muyenera Kudziwa Zokhudza Othandizira Oyimilira Ndi Maubale

Kukhala paubwenzi wosunga zobwezeretsera kumatha kusokoneza komanso kusokoneza nthawi yomweyo. Nthawi zonse umakhala pamavuto chifukwa sudziwa ngati munthu amene umamukonda amakukondanso. Simudziwa ngati ali ndi inu chifukwa amakukondani moona mtima kapena chifukwa amakuwonani ngati wokonda kuyimilira kapena ndondomeko yosunga zobwezeretsera. Kafukufukuyu yemwe adachitika ku UK mchaka cha 2014 akuwonetsa momwe maubwenzi otere akuyendera:

• Kafukufukuyu akuwonetsa kuti amayi ali ndi zibwenzi zambiri zobwezera kuposa amuna.
• Azimayi okwatiwa amakhala ndi maubwenzi ambiri backburner kuposa akazi osakwatiwa.
• Mnzako wothandizana naye wa mkazi nthawi zambiri amakhala mnzake wakale kapena bwenzi. Kawirikawiri, munthu amene nthawi zonse amamukonda.
• Amayi 12 pa 100 aliwonse omwe adachita kafukufukuyu adanena kuti malingaliro awo pa okondedwa awo anali amphamvu.

Palibe chomwe chimawawa kuposa kutengedwa ngati njira ndi munthu amene mumamukonda kwambiri. M'dziko lachibwenzi, munthu wotere amadziwika kuti ndi wokondana yemwe amakhala muubwenzi wa backburner. Zimakupangitsani kudabwa zomwe mwachita kuti muyenerere chithandizo chotere. Chabwino, palibe. Osadziimba mlandu ngati mnzako ndi amene walakwa. 

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N'chifukwa Chiyani Akazi Amamva Kufunika Kwa Bwenzi Losunga Zosungirako?

Azimayi omwe sakudziwa za tsogolo lawo amakhala ndi zibwenzi zowathandiza. Safuna kusiyidwa kapena kudzimva kuti sakufunidwa komanso osakondedwa, chifukwa chake nthawi zambiri amakhala ndi njira yosunga zobwezeretsera ngati zinthu sizikuyenda bwino ndi bwenzi lawo lapano. Zifukwa za izi zitha kukhala chimodzi mwa izi:

• Safuna kukhala okha, ngakhale zitatanthauza kukhala ndi munthu amene samukonda kwenikweni.
• Kukhala ndi chibwenzi ndi njira yowonetsetsera kuti nthawi yawo yochitira zinthu zazikulu monga ukwati ndi ana isatayidwe.
• Safuna kuti zolinga zawo kapena maloto awo asokonezeke ngati sapeza machesi awo 'oyenera'.
• Wokonda kuyimilira amatha kukwaniritsa zosowa zawo zamalingaliro mpaka atapeza 'yemweyo'.

Ziribe chifukwa chake, kuchitira munthu yemwe amakukondani moona mtima ngati njira yosunga zobwezeretsera kapena wokonda kuyimilira sichinthu choyenera kuchita. Mukuwatenga mopepuka ndikusewera ndi malingaliro awo. Tangoganizani ngati munthu amene mumamukonda atakuchitirani zimenezo. Kodi mungamve bwanji? Kuchitira munthu yemwe wakhudzidwa kwambiri ndi chibwenzicho ngati alibe kanthu ndikosokoneza komanso kolakwika.

Kukhala Kapena Kusakhala?

Kukhala muubwenzi wosunga zobwezeretsera sikungakhale, mopanda muyeso, kukhala chochitika chosangalatsa. Chifukwa chake, ziyenera kubweretsa vuto loti 'kukhala kapena kusakhala' nthawi ina. Chabwino, ngati mukungofuna kukhala nazo kugonana wamba kapena kungogwedezeka kwina, ndiye kukhala dongosolo losunga zobwezeretsera sikungapweteke. Muzochitika izi, simunatengeke ndi chidwi ndi mgwirizano. 

Komabe, ngati mukufuna kudzipereka kwakukulu, kwa nthawi yayitali, muyenera kutuluka mwamsanga momwe mungathere. Bwanji osayang'ana chikondi cha moyo wanu, m'malo motaya nthawi yanu, mphamvu zanu ndi chuma chanu paubwenzi wopanda kanthu?

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