Xa uthando luvumelene?
Isiqulatho
Xa uthando lwamkelwa kwaye lubuyiselwa ngaphandle kokunyanzelwa, kuyavumelana. Kungenjalo, kwanezenzo zothando ezimsulwa zisenokungamkeleki kwaye zingonwabi. Iinuances zothando oluvumelanayo azikho mnyama namhlophe njengoko abantu abaninzi becinga. Kukungaqondi kakuhle kwezi ndawo zingwevu ekudla ngokubangela ukuba abantu bangayihoyi imvume yomnye umntu bengakhange bayiqonde.
Ngelixa abantu beqonda ukuba ukuxhatshazwa ngokwesondo kukuziphatha okungamkelekanga nokungafanelekanga, into engaqondwa ngokubanzi kukuba impembelelo yokuziphatha okunjalo yahlukile ngokwemeko. Ngokomzekelo, xa umntu omaziyo okanye umntu ongamaziyo ecela uthando, akunzima kangako kumntu ongenamdla ukumgatya. Ukuba ezi nkqubela zenziwa ngumhlobo osenyongweni osele uneminyaka umazi, kuba nzima ngakumbi ukuzigatya kuba ungafuni ukumenza buhlungu.
Ngokufanayo, ukuba ukuqhubela phambili kuvela kumntu osebenza naye osebenza naye ngokusondeleyo, kukho uloyiko lokuba izinto ziya kuba nzima emsebenzini, kwaye ke, ingcinga eninzi ingena kwindlela engcono yokuba hayi. Ngoku, khawufane ucinge ngemeko apho umphathi wakho okanye umphathi onika ingxelo enze oku kwangaphambili. Ukongeza kokungahambi kakuhle, kukho uloyiko olongezelelweyo - ukuziphindezela emsebenzini.
Kwiimeko ezinjalo, uqala ukucinga malunga nokuba uzikhabe okanye ungazigatyi. Ukuba uyayenza, ungayenza njani loo nto ngaphandle kokuchaphazela umsebenzi wakho?
Kungakhathaliseki ukuba oko kukhatywa ngobulali kangakanani na, kusoloko kukho iindlela ezichuliweyo zokuziphindezela. Umbuzo ke uyaphakama, ngaba ubudlelwane bemvumelwano nomqeshwa ophantsi buvumelene ngokwenene? Yiyo loo nto kubalulekile ukucacisa iintshukumo zobudlelwane bemvumelwano emsebenzini.
UBudlelwane beMvumelwano eMsebenzini-Ngaba ukuThula okuya kwiNkcubeko kuMvume ngenene?
Kwiminyaka embalwa edlulileyo, bendiyinxalenye yophando apho inkokeli ephezulu yathandana nonobhala wayo okhoyo. Bobabini babetshatile (kunye nabantwana), kwaye ukuqhubela phambili kwenziwa ngobuqili kakhulu kumanqanaba okuqala. Eli bhinqa lalikade lililungu lekomiti yangaphakathi yombutho yaye likuqonda okwenzekayo kodwa lakhetha ukuyibetha ngoyaba loo nto de kwabonakala oko. Ngelo xesha, ngobubele wamxelela ukuba wonwabile emtshatweni yaye ngenxa yoko akanamdla.
Ukuqhubela phambili akuzange kume kodwa kutshintshile ukusuka kulindelo lobudlelwane ukuya kwiimvakalelo ezichazwe nje. La mazwi ayengekamkhululeki, kodwa akazange afune ukukhalaza, ecinga ukuba oko kuya kuba nempembelelo kumsebenzi wakhe nowakhe. Ngenye imini, xa wayehamba, umphathi wamthumelela umyalezo:
Andikwazi ukukunyamezela ukuhlala kude nawe ixesha elide kuba ndikuthanda kakhulu.
Ngelishwa, intombi yakhe ekwishumi elivisayo yawufunda lo myalezo yaza yawubonisa uyise, owanyanzelisa ukuba kufakwe isikhalazo phantsi koMthetho we-POSH.
Uye waphakamisa lo mba kwiKomiti yaNgaphakathi eChasene noNgcungcuthekiso ngokweSondo kwaye wasazisa ukuba akafuni kuthathwa manyathelo ngakuye, njengoko ekholelwa ukuba oku kuqhwalela ekugwebeni akufuneki kube nefuthe elibi kumsebenzi wakhe ozukileyo. Wayefuna ukuba iyeke le ndlela yokuziphatha. Xa umphathi waziswa ngesikhalazo, wazithethelela ngoko nangoko, esithi, “Ungayibiza njani le nto yokuhlukumeza ngokwesondo! Uthando lwam kuye alunatyala!”
Andizange ndiqonde ukuba wayethetha ukuthini ngokuthanda kwakhe ukuba msulwa – ingaba wayethetha ukuba akanamdla wesondo kuye, okanye okoko wayengamnyanzeli ukuba athandane naye, wayengamhluphi? Ngokucacileyo, intsingiselo yothando oluvumelanayo yayilahlekile kuye.
Ekugqibeleni, emva kokwaziswa malunga nokwahlukana phakathi kokuxhatshazwa ngokwesondo ngokubanzi kunye nokuxhatshazwa ngokwesondo emsebenzini, ekugqibeleni wavuma uxolelwaniso. Nangona le meko yasonjululwa ngoxolo, ngokuqinisekileyo imele idlale ezingqondweni zabo, njengoko ibisoloko idlala ngam.
UkuFunda okuFanayo: Ungatsho njani ukuba umphathi wakho uyakuthanda ngothando?
Indawo eGrey yoBudlelwane beMvumelwano kunye nomntu ophantsi
Kutshanje (ngexesha lokuvalwa kokuqala), ndiye ndacelwa ukuba ndibonisane ngomnye umba apho intloko ye-HR yombutho yathandana nomntu omtsha owayesandul' ukuphuma ekholejini. Wenza udliwano-ndlebe naye buqu (into ekungafunekanga ayenze) waza waqhuba a incoko yakhe naye ngoWhatsapp ngomfanekiso wokuvuyisana naye xa enikwa isikhundla. Incoko yaba yeyobuhlobo, yaye nangona badibana kube kanye kuphela, kwisithuba seveki nje enye wayesele ebonakalise uthando nomnqweno wakhe wokutshata naye.
Lo yayingumsebenzi wokuqala wentombazana kunye nekhefu elikhulu lamthintela ekubeni amxelele ukuba ayeke. Wamxelela ukuba usemncinane kakhulu yaye ukuba uzimisele ngokwenene, umele ambuze xa bedibene ngokobuqu.
Ngethamsanqa kuye, amathuba okudibana ayembalwa kwaye ekude phakathi ngenxa ye-COVID-19. Ekupheleni kwenyanga yakhe yoqeqesho, kwafuneka atyelele iofisi ukuze agqibezele ukubhalisa kwakhe. Ekubeni wayekwisikhundla sempembelelo, i-HR ephezulu yaqinisekisa ukuba use-ofisini ngexesha ekumele ukuba atyelele ngalo, kwaye xa efikile, wamcela ukuba amkhaphe ukuya kwiofisi yakhe njengoko wayenesipho aza kumnika sona.
Bathe xa bengena kwilift (wamsa kwilift yenkonzo xa ebona ukuba kukho abanye abantu ababekhwele kwilift eqhelekileyo), wazama ukumwola wamcela ukuba amncamise. Intombazana yamtyhalela kude yaze yaphuma kwilifti kwakwithuba lokuqala. Kwiintsuku ezimbini kamva, wafaka isimangalo sokuxhatshazwa ngokwesini emsebenzini.
Xa wayecelwa ukuba aphendule kwesi sikhalazo, wakhanyela ukuhanjiswa ngokwasemzimbeni (okwakuphantse ukuba akunakwenzeka ukungqina kuba yenzeke kwilifti kungekho khamera okanye amangqina) kwaye wathi wayengazi ukuba wayengenamdla kuye kuba wayengazange athi hayi kwaye waqhubeka nokunxibelelana naye kwinyanga ephelileyo. Yonke incoko kaWhatsApp phakathi kwabo yafundwa yikomiti yangaphakathi.
Ngelixa bekuyinyani ukuba bekungekho kukhatywa kucacileyo, ikomiti ibibona utshintsho olucacileyo kwithowuni yemiyalezo yakhe ngalo lonke ixesha esenza inkqubela phambili. Ngokuqhelekileyo “wayexakekile” xa embuza isizathu sokuba angaphenduli kwiimbonakaliso zakhe zothando; wayekuphepha ukudibana naye nokuthetha naye emnxebeni yaye akazange athethe nantoni na ebonisa ukuba uyamphendula. Wayesenobuhlobo yaye akazange atsho ukuba akanamdla.
Ukuqhubela phambili okungamkelwanga Ukungahoyi Imvume
Amatyala anjalo axhaphake kakhulu kwiindawo zokusebenza, kwaye ngumsebenzi onzima kwiikomiti zangaphakathi ukuqinisekisa ukuba okanye hayi iimvakalelo zothando okanye umdla uyabuyiselwa. Kwityala lokuqala, ummangali uye wabonisa ukungabi namdla kwakhe ngokuthi wonwabile emtshatweni wakhe, nangona kunjalo, kwityala lesibini, le nto yayingacacanga.
Ngelixa ukukhatywa kommangali wesibini bekungabonakali, iimpendulo zakhe bezibonisa ukungabi namdla. Xa wayebuzwa ukuba kutheni engazange akwenze kucace ngakumbi ukungabi namdla kwakhe, lo mmangali usixelela ukuba ekuqaleni, wayekonwabele ukuncwasa kodwa wothuswa kakhulu xa kwaguquka kwaba yimbonakaliso yothando ngokukhawuleza nangakumbi xa wayecela umtshato kuye emva kokuba edibene naye kanye kuphela.
Ekuqaleni wayecinga ukuba uyaqhula, yaye xa wafumanisa ukuba uzimisele, wayengazi ukuba angamdanisa njani ngaphandle kokumenzakalisa. Ukongezwa koko kukuba wayesekwi-probation, kwaye akukho mntu kweso sikhundla ofuna ukucaphukisa umntu onelizwi lokugqibela malunga nomsebenzi wakhe. Ingca yokugqibela kuye kuxa wayelindele ukuba ubudlelwane babo bube bomzimba.
Iimeko ezinjalo zizisa ekukhanyeni ubunzima obuvela xa ukuqhubela phambili kwezothando kwenziwa kwindawo yokusebenza ngabantu abakwimo yokuphembelela ubomi bomsebenzi bomamkeli. Noko ke, kubalulekile ukuba abantu abazifumana bekule meko bazi ukuba akulindelekanga ukuba bayamkele loo nkcazelo okanye bayigatye ngokupheleleyo ukuba kukho uloyiko okanye imbono yokuziphindezela.
Noko ke, kubalulekile ukuthetha nokuxela imicimbi enjalo kwikomiti yangaphakathi yombutho. Umsebenzi we-IC kukukhangela ezona zalathisi zincinci ukubona ukuba imvume inikwe okanye hayi.
UkuFunda okuFanayo: Iindlela ezili-12 zeMicimbi yeOfisi inokukupela iNgxaki
Ungaphosisi njani kwicala elingalunganga loBudlelwane beMvumelwano emsebenzini?
Ke, ungaqinisekisa njani ukuba akuyibeki imvume yomntu ekulandeleni iimvakalelo zakho, ngakumbi kwindawo yokusebenza ebandakanya i-equation yodidi oluphezulu? Nanga amacebiso ambalwa:
- Imvume kufuneka icace: Imvume kufuneka iboniswe ngomdla nangokucacileyo. Ukuthi hayi, okanye ukuhlala uthe cwaka akuthethi imvume okanye umdla
- Ukwaliwa okuchuliweyo: Ukuchaswa kunokuba bubuqili. Ngokomzekelo, ukuphepha ukuba wedwa nomntu lowo; ukuphepha iincoko zobuqu, ngelixa ephendula ngomdla xa isihloko sinxulumene nomsebenzi; okanye ukungazinanzi ezi nkqubela phambili. Ayilotyala lommangali ukuba ummangalelwa akayiqondi le nto
- Musa ukubandezeleka uthe cwaka: Ukuthula akuncedi. Ukuziphatha okunjalo kudala imeko-bume yomsebenzi, kunciphise imveliso yakho, kwaye ekugqibeleni kuthintele inkqubela yakho. Ukushiya kwakho umbutho ukunqanda le meko kuya kuba nefuthe elibi kuphela kwikhondo lakho lomsebenzi.
- Isisombululo soxolo sinokwenzeka: Isikhalazo esiya kwi-IC asisoloko sikhokelela ekubeni kuthathwe amanyathelo oluleko ngakummangalelwa. Ukuba ummangali unqwenela isisombululo esinoxolo, uxolelwaniso lunokwenziwa lula kwaye iingcebiso kummangalelwa zinokucetyiswa yi-IC.
- Inkqubela engamkelekanga ifikelela kwi-Sexual Harassment: Ewe, LE YINKCAZELO NGESONDO EMSEBENZINI. Ukuphindaphinda ukuqhubela phambili okungamkelekanga (nokuba akusiyo isondo ngokugqithisileyo) kunokubangela ukuxhatshazwa ngokwasengqondweni kunye nemeko yomsebenzi enobutshaba.
Ukuba ukhona ukutsaleleka kumntu ongaphantsi, gcina ezi zinto engqondweni ukuze uqinisekise ukuba useka ubudlelwane bemvumelwano nomqeshwa ongaphantsi kwaye ungayityesheli imvume yakhe ngayo nayiphi na indlela, nokuba ungaqondanga. Ukuba uphantsi koncedo olungamkelekanga oluvela kumntu omkhulu okanye osebenza naye, yazi ukuba kukho indlela yomthetho efumanekayo kuwe.
Iingcamango zokugqibela: Ukugcina ubudlelwane obunentlonipho emsebenzini
Ngamafutshane, kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuba uthando kunye nemvume emsebenzini zintsonkothile kwaye zifuna unxibelelwano olucacileyo. Ukutolika ngendlela ephosakeleyo iimvakalelo zomnye kunokukhokelela kwiimeko ezingathandekiyo nezide zibe yingozi. Ngalo lonke ixesha ufuna imvume ecacileyo nenomdla, kwaye khumbula ukuba ukuthula okanye ukuphepha akulophawu lwesivumelwano. Ukudala indawo ekhuselekileyo nehloniphekileyo kuvumela wonke umntu ukuba azive ekhululekile ukubeka imida kunye nokuvakalisa iinkxalabo. Njengomntu okwisikhundla sempembelelo, yazi amandla okutshintsha kwaye ubeke phambili ubungcali kunye nentlonipho kulo lonke unxibelelwano.
Ii-FAQ: Ukuqonda Imvume eMsebenzini
1. Ndimele ndenze ntoni xa ndidibana nomntu ongathandani naye emsebenzini?
Akufanele nanini na uzive unyanzelekile ukuba wamkele ucelomngeni olungafunwayo. Kubalulekile ukuba uthethe kwaye uxele ukuziphatha kwikomiti yangaphakathi yenkampani yakho okanye umntu osebenza naye omthembileyo. Unelungelo lendawo yokusebenza ekhuselekileyo nehloniphekileyo.
2. Ngaba ukuthi cwaka okanye ukungafuni ukwala ngokuphandle xa ucelwa ukuba ubonise ukuba uyamthanda kubonisa imvume?
Hayi, ukuthula okanye ukunqongophala kokuchaswa okucacileyo akuthethi imvume. Imvume kufuneka icace, idlamke, kwaye inikelwe ngokukhululekileyo. Ukuchaswa okuchuliweyo okunjengokuphepha iincoko zobuqu okanye ukutshintsha umbandela nako kufanele kuhlonelwe.
3. Ngaba ubudlelwane bothando phakathi komphathi kunye nongaphantsi bunokuze buvumeleke ngokwenene?
Ngenxa yokuguquka kwamandla okubandakanyekayo, ubudlelwane obunjalo buhlala buphakamisa imibuzo malunga nemvume yokwenene. Kwanokuba omabini amaqela aqala ukuvuma, lowo ungaphantsi unokuziva ecinezelekile okanye oyike ukuziphindezela ukuba azama ukuluphelisa ulwalamano. Kubalulekile ukuzazi ezi ngxaki kwaye ubeke phambili imida yobungcali.
4. Ziziphi iziphumo zokungahoyi imvume emsebenzini?
Ukungahoyi imvume kudala imeko-bume yomsebenzi, kuchaphazela kakubi imveliso, ukuziphatha, kunye nemisebenzi. Isenokukhokelela ekubeni kuthathwe amanyathelo asemthethweni kwi-Sexual Harassment. Ukubeka phambili unxibelelwano olucacileyo kunye nokuhlonipha imida kubalulekile ekukhuthazeni indawo yokusebenza enempilo nebandakanyayo.
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Umnikelo wakho awuquki isisa umnikelo. Iya kuvumela i-Bonobology ukuba iqhubeke nokukuzisela ulwazi olutsha nolwangoku kwiphulo lethu lokunceda nabani na osehlabathini ukuba afunde ukwenza nantoni na.
