Uninzi lwabantu lune-BFF emsebenzini. Uyazi, lo owabelana naye ngaphakathi uyaqhula, uhleba kwaye ude ujonge imo yomphathi. Ngaphandle kokuqonda, usondelelana kakhulu kwaye uchithe usuku lwakho lonke kunye, nihleba. Uziva ngathi ufumene iqabane lakho lomphefumlo emsebenzini. Umntu osebenza naye umphefumlo unokuba ngumfazi okanye umyeni wakho womsebenzi.
Eli gama laqala ukuvela kudala phaya ngo-1930 kwincwadi kaFaith Baldwin ethi 'The Office Wife' kwaye ngoku lisiko eliqhelekileyo elisetyenziswa phantse kuzo zonke iindawo zokusebenza. Ubudlelwane kunye neqabane lomsebenzi lilinganisa onke amacandelo omtshato, ngaphandle kobudlelwane bothando okanye ngokwesondo. Ewe, iBBC iyibeka ilungile, "Eyona mitshato ilungileyo yobuxoki luhlobo lwe-9-5."
Logama nje useta imida yomfazi ofanelekileyo womsebenzi, olu nxibelelwano lweplatonic lunokwenza iintsuku ezibuhlungu emsebenzini zinyamezeleke ngakumbi. Nangona kunjalo, kuxa imigca iqala ukuba mfiliba apho inkathazo inokubamba. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, iqabane lasemsebenzini linokungenelela kwezinye iinkalo zobomi bakho. Ukuba sele utshatile okanye unolwalamano oluzinikeleyo, oku kunokuthetha ingxaki eparadesi.
Ngaphandle koko, ukubandakanyeka ngokunzulu kunye nenkosikazi yakho yasemsebenzini okanye iqabane lakho lasemsebenzini kunokuba ziindaba ezimbi kuba unokufumanisa ukuba ukuguquguquka kobudlelwane bakho ngaphandle kwendawo yokusebenzela ayizinzeki ixesha elide, kwaye ubudlelwane bakho bunokuthatha ukubetha okungenakulungiseka. Ukuba unaloo mntu ukhethekileyo ebomini bakho ofanelekela ukuba liqabane lakho lomsebenzi, kubalulekile ukuba uqiniseke ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba awophuli imida yobudlelwane bakho.
Ngubani Umfazi Womsebenzi?
Isiqulatho
Abanye abantu batshatele emsebenzini baze abanye abantu babe nabafazi bomsebenzi. Iqabane lasemsebenzini ligama laseMelika elisetyenziselwa ukubhekisa kumntu osebenza naye owabelana naye ngolwalamano olukhethekileyo, olufana nobudlelwane phakathi komyeni nenkosikazi. Intsingiselo yomfazi womsebenzi ishwankathelwa kakuhle kule nkcazo - "Ubuhlobo obukhethekileyo, obusondeleyo kunye nomntu osebenza naye obonakala ngobudlelwane obusondeleyo beemvakalelo, amanqanaba aphezulu okubhengezwa kunye nenkxaso, kunye nokuthembana, ukunyaniseka, ukunyaniseka kunye nentlonipho."
Njengoko kucacile kwintsingiselo yomfazi womsebenzi, lo mntu ayingomfazi wakho wokwenyani ngokucacileyo kodwa ungumlingane osondeleyo owabelana naye ngobuhlobo obuqinileyo. Ukuba kukho umsebenzi onxulumene nomsebenzi, ukubheja uya kuwenza nomfazi wakho womsebenzi. Kodwa ubudlelwane owabelana nabo bu-platonic kuphela - abukho ngokwesondo ngokungqongqo kwaye abunathando.
Nangona kunjalo, xa usebenza ngokusondeleyo nomntu kwaye uchithe ixesha elingcono kunye naye, usuku nosuku, le nxaki inokuba nzima. Umtsalane weqabane lomsebenzi awuqhelekanga kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo unokupela ingxaki kungekuphela nje kubudlelwane bakho nabo kodwa nakweminye imiba yobomi bakho.
Umzekelo, kwenzeka ntoni xa ukuqonda "Ndicinga ukuba ndithandana neqabane lam lasemsebenzini" lifika ekhaya kwaye indawo yakho yokusebenza inomgaqo-nkqubo ongqongqo owalelayo. ubudlelwane bothando emsebenzini? Okanye uxambulisana phakathi kokuthi “Ndiyamthanda umfazi wam wasemsebenzini” nokuthi “Ndiyamthanda umfazi wam wokwenene”.
Ukuze uphephe imigibe enjalo, kubalulekile ukumisela imida yomfazi ofanelekileyo emsebenzini. Ngenxa yoko, kufuneka uqale uvume ukuba, eneneni, uneqabane lomsebenzi, kwaye loo mntu unokuthatha ubomi bakho ukuba awubuphathi kakuhle ubudlelwane.
Iimpawu Ukuba Uneqabane Lomsebenzi
Ukuba nenkosikazi esebenzayo kunokukwenza wonwabe ngakumbi kwaye ube nemveliso ngakumbi emsebenzini. Ukuziphatha kwakho kuyenyuka kwaye kubonisa ekusebenzeni kwakho. Abantu abaninzi sele benamaqabane omsebenzi bengaqondanga. Ukuba wabelana ngobudlelwane obukhethekileyo nomntu osemsebenzini ke ukuba sele uwufumene umdlalo wakho! Jonga ezi mpawu ukuze wazi ukuba ubunomfazi ophangelayo ngalo lonke eli xesha:
- Uba nesidlo sasemini naye yonke imihla: Awukhe uhlale wedwa kwaye ube nesidlo sakho sasemini. Umfazi wakho wasemsebenzini ukhona ukukhapha yonke imihla. Awudingi nokubagcinela isitulo okanye i-vice-versa kuba iofisi yonke iyazi ukuba nobabini nitya izidlo zenu kunye, ngoko ke abanye oogxa bayakumema ukuba uhlale etafileni okanye ujoyine eyakho.
- Unesabelo sakho esilungileyo kwiziqhulo zangaphakathi: Ukuqhaqha iziqhulo kuphela umfazi wakho womsebenzi unokuqonda ukuba yi-vibe. Ngamanye amaxesha ukuncuma nje kwanele ukuba afumane isiqhulo. Uyazi ukuba uneqabane lomsebenzi xa unokudlulisa kwaye uqonde imiyalezo yomnye nomnye ngokujonga nje okanye ngokunqwala kwiicubicles zakho.
- Uhlala ekhona ukuze akuxhase: Xa ungcwatywe ngumsebenzi omninzi, ubakho ukuze akuxhase ngokweemvakalelo nangokwengqondo. Unokuhlala uthembele kuye ukuba enze usuku lwakho lubengcono. Ukuhamba nosuku olunye eofisini ngaphandle kweqabane lakho lespork ecaleni kwakho kuvakala ngathi kukutsala
- Nishiyana izipho edesikeni: Nobabini nithanda ukushiya izinto ezothusayo ezincinci kwiidesika zomnye. Ezi zimanga kunye nezipho zihlala zibethelela isikhonkwane entloko kuba niyazana njengomva wezandla zenu
- Wazi yonke into: Nokuba lusuku lwakho lokuzalwa okanye isikhumbuzo somtshato wakho, uyayazi yonke loo nto. Ungade uzilibale ezi ntsuku kodwa akakukhumbuli kwaye usenokukukhumbuza. Hayi nje iziganeko ezibalulekileyo kunye neziganeko, uyazi kwaye ukhumbula iinkcukacha ezincinci malunga nawe - indlela othanda ngayo ikofu yakho, zingaphi iihempe eziluhlaza onazo, idrowa oyigcinayo imfihlo yakho yomsi njalo njalo.
Unxibelelwano lomlingane womsebenzi unokuziva ngathi yinkqubo enkulu yenkxaso. Nangona kunjalo, yonke imitshato ineentsilelo zayo, kunye ne-9-5. Ngaba umtshato wakho wasemsebenzini uyawohloka? Ngaba wena kunye nenkosikazi yakho yomsebenzi niwele imida yobuchwephesha kwaye nisebenza kubomi benu? Ngaba unomfazi osebenzayo onezibonelelo? Ngapha koko, i imigca phakathi kobuhlobo obumsulwa kunye nentlantsi yesini ingafiphalisa ngokukhawuleza. Ke, inokuba lixesha lokuphinda uphonononge i-equation yakho kwaye ubeke imida ecacileyo yenkosikazi yomsebenzi.
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Iimpawu ezili-13 zokuSebenza nguMfazi wakho uthatha kuBomi bakho
Unokuba uxhomekeke kakhulu kwiqabane lakho lomsebenzi kwaye awukwazi ukucinga indawo ngaphandle kwabo. Iyakhula ukuya kuthi ga kwinqanaba lokuba uzive ngathi awunakusebenza xa ungekho iqabane lakho lasemsebenzini. Usenokungatshintshi nomsebenzi wakho ngenxa yokoyika ukuphulukana nenkosikazi yakho yomsebenzi kwaye uvumele amathuba angcono adlule.
An umcimbi ngokweemvakalelo imiphezulu ebomini bakho kwaye uyazibuza ukuba ingabalwa njengokukopela. Usenokutyholwa ngokunganikeli ngqalelo yaneleyo kwintsapho yakho, yaye izinto zisenokuba nzima. UMarwin wazityand’ igila kumhlobo wakhe wathi: “Ndiyamthanda umfazi wam wasemsebenzini.
Umhlobo wakhe emva koko watsalela ingqalelo kaMarwin kwinto yokuba umfazi wakhe wasemsebenzini wayelawula ubomi bakhe kwaye le nxaki inzima inokumxabisa kakhulu. NjengoMarwin, ngaba nawe ujamelene nokutsaleleka kweqabane lasemsebenzini yaye uzabalazela ukugcina imida yolu lwalamano lukhethekileyo? Nika ingqalelo kwezi flegi zibomvu ukuze ufumane impendulo:
1. Ukuvelisa kwakho kuthatha igophe eliya ezantsi
Nangona kusithiwa ukuba nenkosikazi esebenzayo kwandisa imveliso, kunokuba nefuthe elibi nako, ngakumbi ukuba ukhulisa iimvakalelo ngeqabane lakho lasemsebenzini. Udla ngokuphelelwa ngumdla emsebenzini wakho yaye injongo yakho yokuya emsebenzini ngokuthe ngcembe iba kukuchitha ixesha nokuhleba nomfazi wakho wasemsebenzini. Umphathi wakho uqala ukufinga iintshiyi ngalo lonke ixesha uphuma edesikeni nokuba ufuna ikomityi yekofu.
Olunye lweempawu ezinkulu zokutsalwa kweqabane emsebenzini kukuba ukuba kunye nabo kuba yeyona nto iphambili yexesha lakho emsebenzini. Ukubona umsebenzi wakho umfazi iba yintshukumisa kuphela yokubonisa ukusebenza yonke imihla. Ukuba ezi mvakalelo azibuyiselwa okanye omnye wenu sele ekubudlelwane obuzinikeleyo, izinto zinokuphuma kulawulo ngokukhawuleza.
2. Iba buqu kunye nenkosikazi yomsebenzi
Xa usondela kakhulu kumfazi wakho womsebenzi, imida yakho yobuqu kunye neyobuchule iqala ukufiphala ngaphandle kokuba uyiqonde. Wabelana ngezona mfihlo zakho zinzulu kunye naye ucinga ukuba ungumntu ozithembayo kwaye ubudlelwane bakho naye bujika bube buqu. Uqala ukwenza okufanayo kwaye ngaphambi kokuba uyazi, awusengoogxa bakhe.
Olu hlobo lobudlelwane bunokukhokelela kumtsalane onamandla macala omabini, kwaye unokude uphele kumfazi womsebenzi onenzuzo imeko. Ngokomzekelo, uJoe no-Amanda, bagqibela ngokuba nobusuku oburhabaxa, beneentlobano zesini emva kokudibana ngaphandle kweofisi ukuze bafumane iziselo.
Ekubeni ulindelo lwalungachazwanga ngokucacileyo, inxaki yabo yakhawuleza yabhideka emva koko. UJoe akazange akwazi ukuyisusa imvakalelo ethi “Ndiyamthanda umfazi wam wasemsebenzini” ngoxa uAmanda wayengekakulungeli ukuba nobudlelwane obupheleleyo.
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3. Uyakutsalela phantsi naye
Xa abalingane ababini benengqondo efanayo, bayancedana ukuze baqhube kakuhle emsebenzini. Kodwa ukuba umfazi wakho wasemsebenzini uchasene ngqo nomqeshwa wenyanga, naye uyakutsalela phantsi naye. Impembelelo yakhe kubomi bakho inokukuguqula ube ngumdlali oqhelekileyo njengaye.
Oku kuyinyani ngakumbi xa ubambekile kwisigaba “sothando neqabane lam lomsebenzi” okanye lakho umfazi wasemsebenzini utsaleleke kuwe, njengoko usenokuba ukulungele ukwenza nantoni na ukuze umzuze – nokuba kukuchitha ixesha elininzi kunye naye okanye ukumenzela izinto eziyekelelayo ngeendleko zoxanduva lwakho lobuchwephesha.
4. Uzivalele kwabanye ubudlelwane
Uxakeke kakhulu nonkosikazi wakho wasemsebenzini kangangokuba inye into odibana nayo emsebenzini. Awuzange ushiye indawo yokuphuhlisa ubudlelwane bobuhlobo nabanye osebenza nabo, ngaloo ndlela uphazamisa ubudlelwane bakho emsebenzini. Abakuboni njengomhlobo wabo yaye xa ucela uncedo kubo, baya kuba mathidala ukukunyathela.
Unxibelelwano lweqabane lomsebenzi, ukuba aluphathwanga ngokuchanekileyo, lunokuthatha indawo eninzi yentloko kunye nexesha, lungashiyi nawuphi na umda wokunxibelelana nabanye osebenza nabo. Kwimisebenzi emininzi, oku kunokuba ngumqobo ekukhuleni kwakho komsebenzi.
5. Iifowuni azihlali eofisini
Ubudlelwane bakho kunye nenkosikazi yakho yomsebenzi ayihlali kuphela kwiingcango zeofisi yakho emva kwenqaku. Nobabini uqala ukuba iincoko zobuqu ukuba kude nje ofisi goss. Ngokuqhubeka nobudlelwane bakho naye ngaphaya kwendawo osebenza kuyo, nobabini niwele umda wokuba ngabahlobo basemsebenzini kuphela.
Kungekudala, uya kuqalisa ukuxhoma ngeeyure ezingasebenziyo, ukuba awukakwenzi. Olu luphawu olucacileyo lomtsalane weqabane lomsebenzi onokuthi kungekudala i-snowball ibe kubudlelwane obugcweleyo, okanye okubi ngakumbi kwiofisi ukuba omnye wenu sele ezinikele. Zibuze, "Ngaba ndikulungele ukuthatha izinto kwinqanaba elilandelayo kunye neqabane lam lomsebenzi?" Ukuba akunjalo, lixesha lokubeka imida ecacileyo yenkosikazi yomsebenzi.
6. Omnye wenu uqala ukubamba iimvakalelo
Ukuba anibeki mithetho esisiseko kwaye nisebenza ngaphakathi kwemida yenu, kuya kufika ixesha apho iimvakalelo ziya kuthatha indawo kwaye omnye wenu akhulise iimvakalelo ngomnye. Xa ubudlelwane bomsebenzi buthatha ithuba lothando kunye neemvakalelo, izinto ziba nzima. Kuxa kufuneka ujonge ukuphuma kumfazi wakho wasemsebenzini.
USusan wadibana noPriya kwitheko le-ofisi yomyeni wakhe kwaye wafumanisa ukuba ukusondelana kwabo kunye nobudlelwane obusondeleyo bungabaxolisi kakhulu. “Bebegqibezelana izigwebo, behleka ngaphakathi iziqhulo, uPriya ebesenza iterritorial yonke nomyeni wam. umntu osebenza naye uncwasa ngoko ngokungenazintloni ngokwendalo iyipilisi ekrakra ukuginya. Nangona ndingumfazi wakhe, ndaziva ndingaphandle kwi-equation. Kwandicacela ngalamini uba umyeni wam unomfazi ophangelayo and she has feelings for him.
“Nangona umyeni wam waye wayicima inkxalabo yam ngelo xesha, akuzange kube kudala ngaphambi kokuba badibane nomtshato oshushu.
7. Awunabo ubomi bakho
Ngokudibanisa ubomi bakho bomsebenzi nobomi bakho bobuqu, awunabo ubomi obahlukileyo obakho. Uhlala ujongana phakathi komsebenzi, ikhaya kunye noxanduva oluza nazo zombini. Ukuba usoloko uphazamiseka emsebenzini, ngenye imini unokuzifumana ungcwatywe kukusilela okukhulu kangangokuba usenokungabi nalo ixesha lokwenza enye into.
Uziva ubambekile ngomsebenzi wakho yonke indawo. Ingathi kwakunganelanga ukwenza umtshato omnye usebenze, ngoku kufuneka ujongane nokulungisa izinto nomfazi wakho wasemsebenzini.
8. Ukhetha ukuchitha ixesha naye endaweni yakhe nabani na
Uzifumana ukhetha umfazi wakho wasemsebenzini phezu kosapho lwakho kunye nabahlobo ngakumbi nangakumbi. Ukuba unikwe ukhetho phakathi kokonwaba nomhlobo wakho, isidlo sangokuhlwa kunye nenkosikazi yakho kunye nabantwana, kunye nokubukela imuvi kunye nenkosikazi yakho yomsebenzi, uya kukhetha eyokugqibela. Ukwenza oku kuba ucinga inkampani yakhe njengotshintsho oluhlaziyayo ukusuka kwizinto eziqhelekileyo zobomi kodwa uyasithemba le mvakalelo ayinakuhlala ngonaphakade.
Inyani yokuba iqabane lakho lomsebenzi lithatha indawo yokuqala kunenye into ebomini bakho ikwabonisa ukuba ubudlelwane bakho abusekho platonic. Akukho sizathu sokuvala ilizwi elithi "Ndiyakuthanda mfazi wam wasemsebenzini" entlokweni yakho kuba uyazi nawe ukuba loo mvakalelo ibambekile. Into ekufuneka uyenzile endaweni yoko kukuthatha inyathelo umva kwaye uvavanye indlela ofuna ukuyiphatha ngayo olu budlelwane ukuya phambili.
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9. Iofisi iba libala ledabi xa iphulukene nayo
Ubomi bakho bomsebenzi awusasebenzi nje. Kufuneka ujongane nenkosikazi yakho yomsebenzi, ngakumbi ukuba ujongene nemiba. Akukho budlelwane buhamba kakuhle kwaye kuya kufuneka ujongane nemiba ethile kunye nomfazi wakho womsebenzi. Kuba wabelana ngobudlelwane bobuqu kunye naye, kuya kufuneka ubuyisele kuye ukuba izinto zijikela emazantsi okanye ngenye indlela.
Awukwazi ukugxila emsebenzini wakho kuba kufuneka nawe mnikele ingqalelo. Ukuba ungumntu omuncu, awunokwazi ukuzibamba kodwa ufune ukuhoywa nakuye. Awunakuphinda uzilibale iingxaki zakho zobuqu ekhaya kuba unazo nasemsebenzini.
10. Awunaye omnye umntu onokuya kuye
Ubomi bakho ngequbuliso bujikeleza umfazi wakho wasemsebenzini. Uphulukane nonxibelelwano nabahlobo bakho ngenxa yomhlobo wakho osenyongweni osanda kumfumana. Uninzi lwemisebenzi yakho ijikeleza kuye, ukusuka ekubambeni isidlo sasemini kunye ukuya kubukela imuvi. Ucinga ukuba usisicombululo sayo yonke into kodwa eneneni ubathintele ungaqondanga abanye abahlobo bakho.
Thatha nje umzuzwana ucinge malunga nokuba kuya kwenzeka ntoni xa iqabane lakho lasemsebenzini litshintsha imisebenzi okanye liqhubela phambili ngokweemvakalelo emva kokufumana unxibelelwano olunentsingiselo nomnye umntu. Ungaziva ulilolo kwaye ulilolo. Ke, misela kwaye ubambelele kwimida yomsebenzi wenkosikazi, ukuze angabi yiyo yonke into kunye nesiphelo sobomi bakho bonke.
11. Iqabane lakho lokwenene liziva lisongelwa
Iqabane lakho lokwenene liziva lisongelwa ngenxa yobudlelwane bakho obusondeleyo nomfazi wakho wasemsebenzini. Unokukrokra ngobudlelwane bakho nomfazi wakho wasemsebenzini kunye umona nokungakhuseleki iya kungena kubudlelwane bakho.
Ewe, awunakumgxeka! “Umyeni wam unomfazi ophangelayo” okanye “Umfana endithandana naye usondelelene neqabane lakhe lasemsebenzini” aziyonto ivuyisayo. Ukuba iqabane lakho lomsebenzi libaluleke kakhulu kangangokuba ubudlelwane bakho obuphambili buchaphazeleka kuloo akhawunti, kuya kuvelisa imiba. Ngaphandle kokuba uthatha amanyathelo abonakalayo ukujonga olu tyekelo, unxibelelwano lweqabane lakho lasemsebenzini lunokuthi luchaphazele ubudlelwane bakho nenkosikazi okanye intombi yakho.
12. Niqala ukuthatha imbeko ngomsebenzi womnye nomnye
Ngaba niyacelana ukuba nincede kwiiprojekthi ezinkulu? Uyavuma ukunceda kwaye ngaphambi kokuba uyazi, wenza konke. Niyafuna ukuncedana kodwa kwelinye icala, kubonakala ngathi kuyahlaba xa omnye wenu efumana ikhredithi kuwo wonke loo msebenzi. Xa oku kusenzeka, umntu owenze lo msebenzi ngaphandle kokuba anikwe imbeko ngawo uqala avakalelwe kukuba unikwa isiphelo esifutshane sentonga.
Kulapho ubudlelwane bakho neqabane lakho lasemsebenzini bunokonakala kwaye bube nzima. Yiyo loo nto imida ibalulekile ngelixa ugcina ubudlelwane bomsebenzi. Isenokungavakali njengokhuphiswano kodwa inokujika ibe ngomnye.
13. Uqala ukwenza njengomfazi wokwenene, kwaye uthanda umyeni
Nje ukuba uqale ukwabelana ngeenkcukacha zonke, ubume bobudlelwane bakho buqala ukutshintsha. Uza kuqala ukubuza uluvo lwakhe kuyo yonke into. Ukususela kwiimpahla ozikhethayo xa uhamba ukuya emsebenzini ukuya kwixesha ofuna ukuphuma ngalo emsebenzini. Wenza okufanayo. Ngaphambi kokuba niyazi, nobabini niya kuba nefuthe kwizigqibo zomnye ngaphandle komsebenzi ngokunjalo. Uziphatha njengabalingane bokwenyani kwaye awuyazi indlela yokuyekisa.
Ukuba nenkosikazi esebenzayo, nangona kunomvuzo, kunokuba necala elinye. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukumisela imithetho esisiseko kwaye ubambelele kuyo ukuze ubudlelwane bakho buhlale ngaphakathi kwemida yobungcali. Ukuba inkosikazi yakho yomsebenzi ithatha ubomi bakho ngaphandle kokushiya indawo yokuba olunye ubudlelwane buguquke, lixesha lokuluqhawula. Lumka ukuba ngubani osondela kuye emsebenzini kuba oko kunokuphazamisa umoya wendawo yonke osebenza kuyo. Khumbula ukuba uze apha ukuza kwenza umsebenzi kwaye wazi ukuba yintoni esemngciphekweni!
Ukuthandana nomntu osebenza naye? Nantsi indlela yokuphatha i-Ofisi Romance
Umnikelo wakho awuquki isisa umnikelo. Iya kuvumela i-Bonobology ukuba iqhubeke nokukuzisela ulwazi olutsha nolwangoku kwiphulo lethu lokunceda nabani na osehlabathini ukuba afunde ukwenza nantoni na.
Yima! Intoni?? Liqabane lomsebenzi. Yayiligama elitsha kum endaweni yokuba le webhusayithi "BONOBOLOGY" indenza ndifunde ezinye zeengqikelelo ezintsha endingaziyo kwaphela kodwa zinomdla kakhulu.