Ndidinga Isithuba-Yeyiphi eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokucela indawo kubudlelwane

UCarrie Bradshaw waphefumlela izibini ezininzi ukuba zixoxe ngesithuba kubudlelwane xa wayegcina indlu yakhe yakudala ukuze anandiphe "ixesha lam" kude nomyeni wakhe, uMnu. Xa usebudlelwaneni bothando, uhlala kwi-bubble ye-lovestruck fantasy, ukuva amagama athi "Ndifuna indawo" kwiqabane lakho kunokukuphosa ngokukhawuleza emhlabeni. Kunzima nangakumbi kukonwabisa ingcinga yokuba unokuba nguwe oswele kakhulu indawo kwiqabane lakho. Kuyavunywa ukuba uyabathanda, kodwa oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka uncanyathiselwe yi-hip 24*7.  

Ukufunda indlela yokubeka imida ukuze ungangeni kwindawo yabucala yomnye kunobuqili. Sithengiselwa ubuxoki obupakishwe kakuhle bokuba ukuba usemathandweni, ufuna ukuhlala ukhohliwe bubukho beqabane lakho. Oku akuyonyani. Imfihlo kubudlelwane obunempilo nobude kukuqonda ukuba nobabini ninobuntu obufuna indawo yokukhula. 

Ngenxa yokuba abantu abaninzi besaba ukuba ukuthetha "Ndidinga indawo" kufana nokuthi "Ndifuna ukuhlukana", abaze bavumele amaqabane abo ukuba bazi iimvakalelo zabo. Ke ukuba ubuzibuza ukuba ungamxelela njani umntu ukuba ufuna indawo ngaphandle kokulimaza iimvakalelo zakhe, silapha ukukunceda. Sikhethe eyona ndlela ilungileyo yokucela indawo kubudlelwane ngoncedo lwe Shazia Saleem (IiMasters in Psychology), ogxile ekwahlukaneni nasekululekweni koqhawulo-mtshato.

Umxelela njani umntu ngembeko ukuba ufuna indawo? 

Wonke umntu ufuna ukulingana okunempilo phakathi ukuchitha ixesha elisemgangathweni nabanye kunye neziqu zabo. Xa kuziwa ekufumaneni olu lungelelwano kubudlelwane, unokuziva ngathi awunandawo yaneleyo yokuphefumla. Okanye ukuba akukho ndawo ishiyekileyo ebomini bakho ukuba ube nguwe, unikwe uxanduva lwakho, imidiya yoluntu, kunye nobomi bosapho.

"Kubalulekile ukuba ube nemida ephilileyo necacileyo kubudlelwane kwasekuqaleni. Amaxesha amaninzi, ukuze uchukumise okanye unike ingqwalasela eyongezelelweyo kwabanye ababalulekileyo, abantu abazihoyanga okanye bazame ukuba ngumntu ongenguye. Yiloo nto kanye eyenza ukufuna indawo ibe yimfuno ecinezelayo ixesha elithile phantsi komgca. Kungcono ukucaca ukusuka kusuku lokuqala kwaye ubeke imida yokwenyani, utshilo. Shazia.

Isidingo sokuba wedwa singokwemvelo kwaye akufanele sifakwe ebhotileni. Ukuba ubambekile phakathi kwengxaki ethi "Ndidinga indawo" kwaye ungazi ukuba ungatsho njani ukuba ufuna indawo kubudlelwane ngaphandle kokulimaza iqabane lakho, masikuncede. Nazi ezinye iindlela onokuthi ngazo ucele indawo ngaphandle kokulimaza iimvakalelo zabo: 

1. Cacisa ukuba uthetha ukuthini na ngesithuba 

“Ndidinga indawo” kusenokuthetha izinto ezininzi. Ukutsho ukuba ufuna indawo kubudlelwane, kufuneka uqale ucacisele iqabane lakho ukuba yintoni na inkcazelo yakho yendawo. Abantu abaninzi banqwenela indawo encinci kuphela ukuba babe ngabo okanye bakhuphe umphunga. Xa ucela indawo, ngokuqinisekileyo awuthethi ukuba uneengcinga ezifihlakeleyo zokuhlala ngokwahlukeneyo kwaye awucebisi ukuba uthathe ikhefu kubudlelwane.

Ngamanye amaxesha konke okudingayo yimva kwemini yasimahla ukwenza nantoni na oyifunayo, nokuba kukuhlutha ikomityi yekofu kwaye ungenzi nto okanye ukudlala imidlalo yevidiyo nabahlobo bakho. Yazisa iqabane lakho ukuba xa usithi “Ndifuna indawo yam”, uthetha iiyure ezimbalwa okanye iintsuku uwedwa.

NgokukaShazia, “Vula unxibelelwano kubudlelwane sisitshixo apha. Thetha kwaye uxoxe neqabane lakho ukuba udinga ixesha lakho. Mchazele ukuba ngokuphila ubomi obuxakekileyo unokudinwa okanye udinwe kwaye ube wedwa ixesha lokonwabela ikomityi yekofu ngoxolo okanye uthathe uhambo kuya kukunceda ukuba uhlaziyeke kwaye ungene kwindawo eyomelela.”

UkuFunda okuFanayo: Imizekelo ye-19 yeMida ephilileyo kubudlelwane

2. Nyaniseka ngeminqweno yakho

Yenza izizathu zokuba kutheni ungakwazi ukuhlala rhoqo ukuba ufuna iqabane lakho licinge ukuba awusamthandi/alisamthandi. Kodwa, ukuba ufuna nje ukunxibelelana "Ndidinga indawo", nyaniseka. Ewe, kusenokuba nzima ukuveza umbandela wokucela indawo kuba unoloyiko lokuba bangawuthatha ngendlela engeyiyo. Nangona kunjalo, ukunqanda umbandela kunye nokunikezela ngemikhondo egqunyiweyo ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kukuhlisa ngendlela engalunganga.

Baya kuqaphela ukuba anibonani njengokuba beniqhelene, kwaye baya kuzama ukuqonda isizathu. Qinisekisa ukuba ekufuneni kwakho indawo, iqabane lakho alishiywanga ukuba likholelwe ukuba uyabalahla. Kungcono ukunyaniseka kunokubanika isizathu sokucinga uyawabhuqa kuba ngokuqinisekileyo iya kubangela umonakalo ongenakulungiswa. 

3. Walumkele amazwi akho

Xa umntu engakuniki gumbi laneleyo lokuphefumla, kunokuba luxinzelelo. Kodwa oku akufuneki ukuba kuguqukele ekubeni yi-squabble. Ngabantu ababini kuphela abakubudlelwane abalindele izinto ezahlukeneyo. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo ekufuneka uyikhumbule kukuba akukho mntu unetyala apha. Ukwazi ukuba ungatsho njani ukuba ufuna indawo kubudlelwane akunakuzizela kuwe, kwaye inokuba yinto echukumisayo kuba inokukhokelela iqabane lakho ukuba licinge ukuba ulahlekelwe nguwe okanye linokubangela imiba yokulahlwa.

UShazia wongezelela esithi: “Ngalo lonke ixesha zama ukukhumbula ngaphambi kokuba uthethe. Qinisekisa ukuba awulahlekelwa kukulawula iimvakalelo zakho. Thatha ikhefu kangangoko ufuna, kwaye xoxa oku kuphela ngeentloko ezolileyo egumbini. Amazwi akho kufuneka abe liyeza lamanxeba abo, ingabi likrele elihlabayo entliziyweni yabo.

4. Bavumele ukuba bavakalise inkxalabo yabo

Ubudlelwane bubudlelwane, kwaye kwintsebenziswano, akukho nto kufuneka ibe yindlela enye. Kuya kufuneka ukwazi ukuqonda imbono yeqabane lakho kunye neemfuno ukuba ucela into kubo. Musa ukuvakalisa nje, “Ndizifunela indawo ethile”, uze uhambe. Yibani nale ncoko xa nobabini ninexesha elaneleyo lokuxoxa ngayo yonke into eyimfuneko yokuzoba ngokutsha imida yendawo yobuqu kubudlelwane.

Ukuba iqabane lakho linazo naziphi na izinto ezibekelwe bucala okanye iinkxalabo, zithethe ngokuzolileyo nangokuphandle kangangoko unako. Sukuthatha izimvo zabo kunye nezimvo njengelinge lokukucinezela. Mhlawumbi bafuna ulwazi oluthe kratya malunga nokuba le mfuno yendawo ivela phi ukuze bakwazi ukusonga intloko yabo kuyo. Kuya kufuneka wenze konke onako ukuququzelela oko, ubaqinisekise, kwaye ubafake ebhodini ngombono. 

UkuFunda okuFanayo: Iindlela ezi-6 zokuba novelwano ngakumbi kubudlelwane ngokutsho kweNgcali

5. Bakhumbuze ngothando lwakho 

Amanye amaxhala eqabane lakho malunga nawe afuna indawo inokunxulunyaniswa nesimbo sokuncamathela okanye indlela yokuziphatha yobudlelwane. Ukuthandana kwethu kunye nokuziphatha kobudlelwane kuphenjelelwa zizimbo zethu zokuncamathela okanye indlela esifundiswe ngayo ukunxibelelana ngokweemvakalelo kunye nokubonisa uvelwano kwabanye kubomi bethu abadala.

Umzekelo, ukuba iqabane lakho linesimbo sokuncamathela esinexhala, baya kukufumanisa kunzima ukuziva bekhululekile kubudlelwane kwaye baya kunamathela kuwe ngenxa yokoyika ukulahlwa. Oku kuthetha ukuba xa uxelela umntu wakho ukuba “ndifuna indawo yam”, into aya kuyiva kukuba uyamshiya. Kwimeko enjalo, indlela yokutsho ukuba ufuna indawo kubudlelwane iba yinto ebalulekileyo.

Basenokumangaliswa kwaye bacinge ukuba ubuya umva, ngoko kufuneka uthathe ixesha lokubaqinisekisa. Bazise ukuba ubeka imida kwaye usabathanda. Nokuba ucela indawo yokucamngca ngemeko yobudlelwane bakho, uve iinkxalabo zabo kunye musa ukuba ngumntu ozingcayo. 

6. Yenza isivumelwano sibe nomtsalane ngakumbi 

Ndingamxelela njani umfana wam ukuba ndifuna indawo? Ndithetha njani ngesihloko sendawo nentombi yam? Iqabane lam liya kusabela njani ukuba ndicela indawo? Zonke ezi ziinkxalabo ezisemthethweni, kodwa isisombululo silula - yenza isiphakamiso sibhenele kubo. Nangona ukuba nendawo yakho kungabonakali njengento entle kubudlelwane, kuneengenelo kumacala omabini.

Yenza iqabane lakho libone oko ukuze libenze bafudumale kulo mbono. UShazia uyacacisa, “Okokuqala, zilumkele iimvakalelo neengcinga zakho, ufuna ntoni wena? 

Ngokomzekelo, iqabane lakho lisenokuba nexesha lokwenza izinto elalushiyayo emva kokuba nidibene okanye nitshatile. Cacisa indlela indawo enokuba nefuthe ngayo kulwalamano lwakho kunye nendlela eya kuba luncedo ngayo kuni nobabini kwixesha elide. Cacisa ukuba oku kuya kukuvumela njani ukuba ube ne isiseko esomeleleyo kubudlelwane bakho. Musa ukushiya incasa emuncu emlonyeni weqabane lakho; endaweni yoko, mnike icala eliqaqambileyo.

Umcela njani umntu ngesithuba kwisicatshulwa?

"Ndingamxelela njani umfana wam ukuba ndifuna indawo ngaphandle kokujongana naye?"
"Ndidinga indawo kubudlelwane kodwa ndingayithetha njani lento ebusweni bentombi yam?"
“Andibaboni xa ndibaxelela ukuba ndifuna indawo!”

Imiba yokungqubana? Thatha uncedo lwetekhnoloji! Ukucela indawo ngokubhaliweyo ayisiyonto ilungileyo kuba kuninzi kulahleka ekuguquleleni ngexesha lencoko ngombhalo. Nangona kunjalo, nokuba lelona ncedo lungcono kuwe lixhomekeke kwinqanaba ubudlelwane bakho kunye neemeko zakho. Ukuba umntu othandana naye inyanga sele eqala ukukukhathaza, mhlawumbi ukucela indawo ngaphezu kwesicatshulwa kungcono. Sivumele ukuba senze lula le nkqubo kuwe. 

UkuFunda okuFanayo: Xa kufuneka uhambe kude kubudlelwane? Iimpawu ezili-11 ezibonisa ukuba lixesha

Ukuxelela umntu ukuba "ndifuna indawo" akululanga njengokuchwetheza nje loo magama. Kufuneka ibe lula ngakumbi ukuze umyalezo wakho uhanjiswe ngokucacileyo kwaye ungashiyi naliphi na igumbi lokunxibelelana kakubi. Ngaba ufuna indawo ngenxa yokuba ufuna ukwenza umsebenzi othile, okanye uzama ukuxelela umntu ukuba ufuna indawo emva kokuba ekwenzakalisa? Umyalezo kunye nenjongo kufuneka idluliselwe ngokucacileyo. Ukukunceda wenze loo nto kanye, Nazi ezinye izinto omawuzigcine engqondweni ukuthumela umyalezo obhaliweyo othi "Ndidinga indawo" ngaphandle kokuvakala ngathi ngumzalwana okhohlakeleyo we cupid:

1. Elula kwaye ngqo

"Ndidinga indawo" intsingiselo yomyalezo obhaliweyo inokuvulelwa ukutolikwa ukuba ayibhalwanga kakuhle. Ngoko ke, thetha ngokuthe ngqo kwaye wamkele ubuhle bokulula. Nanku umzekelo:

Hayi,
Ndilinandipha ngokwenene ixesha esilichitha kunye kodwa mvanje, ndiziva ndifuna ukunikela ingqalelo engakumbi kwezinye izinto zobomi bam. Ukufumana indawo ethile kuya kuba sempilweni kakhulu kum kwaye ndiya kukwazi ukugxila kubudlelwane ngendlela efanelekileyo.

2. Musa ukuntywila nzulu kwingcaciso

Ukuba ulwalamano lwenu lutsha ngokwentelekiso, unokutsiba ingcaciso ende yeemvakalelo neemvakalelo. Sukungena ekuchazeni umyalezo othi “Ndidinga indawo” othetha kubo. Yigcine imfutshane kwaye iswiti. Jonga lo myalezo ungezantsi (hamba phambili, Ctrl C kwaye V kuyo kwiDM yakho)

Hayi,
Uyamangalisa kwaye bendinexesha elingcono kunye nawe kodwa ndicinga ukuba kufuneka ndithathe inyathelo ngoku. Kodwa oku akuchaphazeli ulwalamano lwethu nangayiphi na indlela.

Ewe, oku bekungayi kusebenza ukuba bekukho imithwalo. Awunakukwazi ukuba yiyo le nto xa uxelela umntu ukuba ufuna indawo emva kokuba ekulimazile. Ukuba ufuna ukuthatha isithuba ngokwenyani emva komlo, ingcaciso eyongezelelekileyo ayizukulimaza.

3. Dibanisa uburharha 

Elona cebiso lilungileyo lokuxelela umntu ukuba ndifuna indawo kukungayenzi into enkulu. Qiniseka ukuba kulungile ukucela indawo kwaye akufuneki uzive ngathi sisiphelo sehlabathi. Kutheni usenza inkohlakalo xa ingumntu othandekayo oncedisa iqhawe kunye neqhawekazi?

Bathumelele into ehlekisayo Ndifuna umyalezo obhaliweyo wendawo obonisa ukuba le yindlela ephilileyo yokumisela imida. Hayi iqhula lendalo? Nanku umzekelo wakho:

Hayi,
Sihlala sikunye rhoqo, ndicinga ukuba ndifuna iintsuku ezimbalwa ukuze ndizikhumbuze kunjani ukukukhumbula (faka i-emoji)

Ukucela indawo phezu kwesicatshulwa asiyokomityi yeti yomntu wonke. Ke nantsi eminye imizekelo embalwa yokukunceda uthumele ukuba ndifuna umyalezo obhaliweyo wendawo kwiqabane lakho:

• “Ndiyakuthanda ukuhlala nawe, kodwa kufuneka ndinikel’ ingqalelo kwezinye izinto ezibalulekileyo kangangexesha elithile”
• “Sinexesha elide sikunye yaye ndikuthanda kakhulu. Kodwa ngoku, ndifuna ixesha ndedwa. Oku akubonisi nangayiphi na indlela indlela endivakalelwa ngayo ngawe okanye ngolwalamano lwethu”
• Ngaphambi kokuba ndidibane nawe, bendingatshatanga ixesha elide kwaye ndiyalikhumbula elo xesha. Olu lwalamano lubalulekile kum kodwa ndifuna indawo ukuze ndibe nexesha lam nelezihlobo zam.

“Ungaze unike iqabane lakho iingcamango zobuxoki namathemba.” Umzekelo, “Siza kuhlala sikunye”, “Andifuni kuphila ngaphandle kwakho nomzuzu nje omnye” zizithembiso ezinokukhokelela kulindelo olungafunwayo.” Abantu kufuneka babe ngokoqobo, banyaniseke yaye banyaniseke kulwalamano.Yiba nguwe, musa ukuzenza,” wongezelela uShazia.

Ndifuna umyalezo obhaliweyo wendawo: imizekelo emi-5

Ukucela indawo kubudlelwane kunokuba nzima. Kodwa emva kwale khosi incinci yengozi malunga nendlela yokuxelela umntu ukuba ndifuna indawo, ngethemba lokuba zonke iziseko zakho zigqunyiwe. Nangona kunjalo, sinikezela kuwe eminye imizekelo embalwa yokuba "Ndifuna indawo" imiyalezo ebhaliweyo, ukuze ufumane imizekelo.

1. Molo ***** (Gcwalisa ikota oyithandayo yothando), ndifuna iintsuku ezimbalwa ndindedwa ukuze ndizibeke kwindawo yam. Nceda ungakhathali kwaye ungayiboni le nto njengokuba ndifuna ukwahlukana nawe. Ndifuna ukuhlaziya ngaphambi kokuba ndiphinde ndikubone
2. Hey ****, ndingathanda ukuzithathela impelaveki ndize ndiphume kwenye indawo. Nceda ungayithathi le nto ngayo nayiphi na enye indlela. Ndiyakuthanda ukuchitha ixesha ndedwa. Mhlawumbi nawe uya kufumana ixesha lokugqiba loo ncwadi ubuyifunda. Undixelele ngayo xa ndibuyile
3. Molo sithandwa, ngaba kulungile ukuba ndichithe iimvakwemini ndedwa? Mhlawumbi ndingaluthatha ngokwam olo hambo. Unokwenza enye into okwangoku. Ndicinga ukuba kuya kuba kuhle ukuba sobabini size omnye komnye ngamandla ahlaziyiweyo
4. Hayi hayi! Ndisegumbini lam. Ucinga ukuba ungahoya isidlo sangokuhlwa ngaphandle kwam? Ndifuna ukuba ndedwa, nditye i-junk kwaye ndibukele into ethile. Ukuziva nje ngathi. Ibiyiveki exakekileyo. Musa ukuyithatha ngokwakho, uthando. Ndiyakuthanda
5. Uthando! Ndiyakuthanda ukuchitha ixesha nawe kodwa mva nje, bendinqwenela ixesha kunye nam. Ininzi into endifuna ukuyenza endingakhange ndikwazi ukuyenza. Ndiyathemba ukuba kulungile ukuba nditsibe izicwangciso zethu zomhla wempelaveki ngeli xesha. Ndiyifuna nyani le ❤️

Uphendula Njani KuMna Ndidinga Isithuba Kwisicatshulwa?

Ukucela indawo emntwini kuyoyikisa. Kodwa ukuba kwelinye icala lombuzo kunokoyikisa ngokufanayo. Mhlawumbi ayinguwe oziva ufuna ukuchitha ixesha uwedwa kubudlelwane, kodwa iqabane lakho linokuthi. Wonke umntu uneemfuno ezahlukeneyo. Ukuqonda iimfuno zabo luncedo kuwo omabini amaqela. Bambalwa abantu abakwaziyo ukucela indawo kodwa nokuba bambalwa bayazi ukuba baphendule njani “Ndidinga indawo” kubudlelwane. Eli lixesha olimiselayo imida eya kwenza ubudlelwane bakho bomelele endaweni yokuyonakalisa.

Ke, ukuba usandula ukufumana umyalezo obhaliweyo othi "Ndifuna indawo", musa ukuphaphazela. UShazia ucebisa ngelithi, “Hlala uhlonipha kwaye uzazi iimfuno zabanye, ungaze uzityeshele iimfuno zomlingani wakho.Kulungile ukuba nembono eyahlukileyo kuneyeqabane lakho kodwa livumele inkululeko yokuzikhethela.Ukuba iqabane lakho licela indawo kubudlelwane, kubalulekile ukubavumela benze ukhetho kunye nezigqibo zabo.Yiqonde into abayifunayo kwaye uzame ngandlela zonke ukuba liqabane elixhasayo.

UkuFunda okuFanayo: Imithetho eyi-11 yegolide yokwenza ubudlelwane busebenze

Kuya kufika ixesha apho iqabane lakho linxibelelana nemfuno yalo yendawo kubudlelwane. Xa oko kusenzeka, khumbula ukuba nolwazelelelo. Nantsi indlela ophendula ngayo "Ndidinga indawo": 

1. Ukuba kunokwenzeka, buza malunga nobungakanani bendawo efunwa ngumntu

Cela uluhlu lwexesha eliqinisekileyo lokuba iqabane lakho lizimisele ukuba kude kangakanani. Kwakhona, fumanisa ukuba yintoni abayilindeleyo kuwe njengokugcina unxibelelwano luncinci okanye ukudibana kuphela namaxesha athile ngeveki. Oku kukunika ukukwazi ukujongana neemfuno zabo ngelixa unqanda ukutolika ngendlela engeyiyo enokwenzakalisa unxibelelwano.

Xa iqabane lakho likucela indawo, unokuthi, “Ndifuna ngokwenene ukukunika indawo oyifunayo. Ungachaza iimfuno zakho ngokucacileyo ukuze ndazi ukuba mandilindele ntoni?”

Ngokomzekelo, banokukucela ukuba uyeke ukunxibelelana nabo kangangeentsuku ezimbalwa. Oku kunokuquka ukungathumeli imiyalezo ngefowuni, kwiwebhsayithi yokuncokola, nokunxibelelana ubuso ngobuso. Basenokuba, nangona kunjalo, ngesicatshulwa ngamaxesha athile. Musa ukubacaphukela. Basenokuba bazibuza kangangeentsuku ukuba bangamxelela njani umntu ukuba ufuna indawo ngaphandle kokulimaza iimvakalelo zabo, ngoko ke qonda ukuba abazimiselanga ukukwenzakalisa.

2. Baxelele ukuba ubanika indawo kuba ubakhathalele

Enye yeengozi zokunika umntu indawo kukuba aqalise ukukholelwa ukuba awunamdla kuye. Oku kunokuba yiCatch-22 kuba bayakucaphuka ukuba uqhubeka nokufikelela ngaphandle kokuba betshilo isidingo sabo sendawo. Cacisa ukuba uya kuyeka kuphela de balungele ukuphinda basondele kwakhona ukuze uqinisekise ukuba nobabini nikwiphepha elinye.

Unokuthi, "Ubaluleke kakhulu kum, kwaye ndiyabona ukuba udinga indawo ngoku," okanye "Ndiza kukunika indawo oyifunayo, kwaye ndiyathemba ukuba oku yenza nzulu unxibelelwano lwethu lwexesha elide. "

3. Kuxabise ukunyaniseka kwabo

Akulula ukuthi “Ndidinga indawo” kubudlelwane. Uninzi, ukuba ayilulo lonke, lokuthandana kwethu kunye nonxibelelwano lobudlelwane lufudukele kwi-intanethi ngenxa yokwanda kokusetyenziswa kobuchwepheshe kubomi bethu bemihla ngemihla. Kulula kakhulu ukuba abantu banyamalale kwaye bangaze bathumele imiyalezo kwakhona, kungabikho ngcaciso. Ngoko ke umntu okwazisa ukuba ufuna indawo ethile ungcono kunokuthula koonomathotholo. Nokuba iindaba azikho ntle, kungcono kunokuba ushiywe ebumnyameni, uzibuza ukuba kutheni izinto zitshintshile.

U-Shazia uthi, "Lixabise iqabane lakho ngokucela indawo kwaye uliqinisekise ukuba usoloko ukho xa kuyimfuneko. Baxelele ukuba uyayiqonda kwaye uyayihlonela imfuno yabo yendawo okanye yangasese, kwaye kwangaxeshanye, bazise ukuba ukholelwa kwimida ephilileyo kubudlelwane kwaye ulindele okufanayo. Indawo ayinakunikwa ngendlela enye. Omabini amaqabane kufuneka anike omnye nomnye isixa esifunekayo sendawo - leyo, ngokwahlukileyo, kubantu abahlukeneyo." 

Ke, umxelela njani umntu ukuba ufuna indawo kubudlelwane? Ngokuthetha ngokufanelekileyo iminqweno yakho. Sukoyika. Indawo inokuba luhle ngokwenene kubudlelwane bakho. Kwaye ukuba kukho umntu ocela indawo kuwe, musa ukuzithethelela kwaye ukhethe ukulwa, nqumama, mamela kwaye uqonde apho avela khona. Ubudlelwane obuphilileyo bakhelwe phezu kwesiseko sokunyaniseka nonxibelelwano. Qinisekisa ukuba uyayibethelela kubudlelwane bakho kwaye uya kukwazi ukoyisa yonke into kunye.

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