Uthando lunokuziva lunqabile kwiminyaka yokuthandana kunye ne-ghosting. Ukuswayipha kunye nexesha lesikrini kwenze ukuba ukudibana nabantu kube nzima. Ngapha koko, ukuthandana kuba trickier namhlanje xa abantu abaninzi abazingelayo phezu phones zabo, ghosting eqhelekileyo, kunye nokudinwa ukusuka ukuthandana ngokwenene kakhulu. Usenokuba uyazibuza ukuba ungalufumana njani uthando xa iingxaki zibonakala zichasene nawe. Nangona kunjalo, unxibelelwano olunentsingiselo lusenokwenzeka.
Ngokujolisa kwizinto ezibalulekileyo kunye nokuthatha inyathelo, uthando lunokukufumana. Sikuzisela iindlela ezingama-21 ezixhaswa ziingcali zokutsala kunye nokukhulisa uthando olunentsingiselo, ngokubonisana nobudlelwane kunye nomqeqeshi wobudlelwane obusondeleyo. Shivanya Yogmayaa, ngubani oqinisekisiwe ngamazwe ngamazwe kwiindlela zonyango ze-EFT, NLP, CBT, kunye ne-REBT.
Iingcebiso ezingama-21 ezingatyhilwanga zokukunceda ufumane uthando
Isiqulatho
Ukuba kubudlelwane okanye ukufumana iqabane lakho ngonaphakade ayisiyiyo yonke kwaye isiphelo sobomi bonke. Kodwa ubomi bakho bunokuba yingxubakaxaka emdaka ukuba uzama ukufumana uthando ngaphandle kwempumelelo. Xa uthando luhlala lunzima, lunokukushiya wonganyelwe yimvakalelo yokungafaneleki kwaye ulahlekelwe yimvakalelo yakho yokuzixabisa, nawe.
Umyalelo wokuqala weshishini kukuphepha ukuwela kulo mgibe usazi. U-Shivanya uchaza into enokuthi ingahambi kakuhle xa uvumela ukufuna indlela yokufumana uthando kukudle: "Kufuneka siqonde ukuba inani lamaqabane anokubakho ngaphezu kokuba unokucinga kwaye ukwaliwa enye ayisiso isiphelo sehlabathi. Sikhupha i-vibes engalunganga, kwaye sidlala umdlalo wokuthandana. Ibangela isiphithiphithi yaye yonakalisa ingqondo yomntu.”
Nokuba ucinga ukuba ungalufumana njani uthando kwi-Intanethi, ulungiselela usuku lwakho lokuqala, okanye uyazibuza ukuba ungalufumana njani fumana umphefumlo wakho, la macebiso angama-21 angatyhilwanga aya kukukhokelela kwicala elifanelekileyo. Ukusuka ekwakheni ukuzithanda kunye nokuzithemba ukuya ekuzibekeni ngaphandle kwaye uthi ewe kumathuba amaninzi, siya kukunceda uqonde ukuba ungahlangabezana njani nothando lobomi bakho ngokusebenza kwaye uvulele unxibelelwano olutsha. Ngamafutshane, ukufumana uthando kubandakanya ukuzazi, ukuzabalazela, uze wenze inyathelo lakho xa ixesha lifanelekile. Ezi ngcebiso ziya kwandisa i-horizons yakho malunga nendlela yokufumana uthando lokwenyani kunye nonxibelelwano olunentsingiselo, ke phuma apho kwaye unike ubomi bakho bothando eyona shot ilungileyo.
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Yakha Isiseko Esomeleleyo—Uthando Luqala Kuwe
Kufuneka ube ngoyena ulungileyo kuqala. Camngca ukuba ungubani kwaye ufuna ntoni phambi kokuba ukhangele iqabane. Oku kuthetha ukuqonda iinqobo ezisemgangathweni zakho, iminqweno, kunye neenjongo, kunye nokwakha ukuzihlonipha.
1. Zazi wena phambi kokuba umazi omnye umntu
Chitha ixesha lokuzihlaziya kwaye ucace malunga nento oyifunayo. Chonga ixabiso lakho, iinjongo zobomi, kunye ne uhlobo lobudlelwane unqwenela. Umzekelo, ngaba ufuna uthando olunzulu okanye ubuqabane obuzinzileyo? Ukunyaniseka kwisiqu sakho kukunceda ulandele abantu abalungileyo. UShivanya uyagxininisa, "Ukumisela eyona nto ibalulekileyo kuwe kuya kukukhokela apho ufuna ukuya khona."
- Zibuze, "Ngaba ndifuna uthando okanye intsebenziswano?" Ukuchaza oku, njengoko uShivanya ecebisa, kunceda ukukhangela ukhangelo lwakho
- Dwelisa ezona zinto zibalulekileyo kuwe, nokuba ngumsebenzi, intsapho, okanye impilo, kwaye ukhangele umntu onemilinganiselo efana neyakho
- Zibandakanye kwi-introspection ngokusebenzisa ijenali okanye imibuzo yobuntu) ukucacisa amandla akho kunye nento oyifunayo ngokwenene.
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2. Ziqhelise ukuzithanda nokuzixabisa
enza ukuzithanda okubalulekileyo kwakho. Ziphathe ngobubele nangentlonipho ukuze ungabi nazinzo. Gcina impilo-ntle yakho ngokwenza umthambo, izinto ozonwabisa ngazo, okanye ngonyango. Khumbula ukuba, xa uziva wonwabile ngesiqu sakho, abanye bayatsaleleka kuloo ntembelo. Enyanisweni, abantu abanokuzithemba okuphezulu babika ubudlelwane obonwabisayo.
"Indlela ekukuphela kwayo yokufumana uthando lokwenyani kunye nokufumana ubudlelwane obuhambelanayo obuhambelanayo kukuthanda wena kuqala. Amaxesha amaninzi, asazi ukuba sifuna ntoni okanye singoobani. Ukuba awufundi ukuzithanda, kunzima kakhulu ukufumana ubudlelwane obulinganayo, obunothando, obuhambelanayo kunye nentlonipho. Ukuba ubudlelwane bakho nawe akulunganga, uya kutsalela umntu ongazinzanga kubudlelwane bakho kwaye uya kutsala kakhulu kubudlelwane bakho. ngelixa elizayo."
-Shivanya Yogmayaa, ubudlelwane kunye nomqeqeshi wobudlelwane obusondeleyo
3. Nikela ingqalelo ekukhuleni, kungekhona ekufezekeni
Cinga ngobomi bakho njengohambo oluqhubekayo lokukhula. Kunokuba ujonge inguqulelo yefantasy yakho okanye iqabane eligqibeleleyo, gxila kwinkqubela phambili eyinyani. Inokukunceda ukwenza "i-CV yothando", apho ugxininisa umdla wakho wokwenene, impumelelo, kunye namandla, kwaye uyihlaziye njengoko ukhula. Qhubeka ufunda kwaye wongeze izakhono ezitsha. Umzekelo:
- Qhubeka nophuhliso lobuqu: thatha iiklasi okanye ufunde izakhono ukuze ube nolungelelwano ngakumbi
- Yakha iprofayile yokuthandana ngokunyanisekileyo endaweni yokwenza umfanekiso ogqibeleleyo
- Zibekele iinjongo zokukhula ngokwenza imisebenzi yamavolontiya, imiceli mngeni yokomelela, okanye nantoni na ekukhuthazayo, ukuba uhlale usebenzela umntu ozithembayo kwaye onomtsalane.
4. Khumbula, utsala into oyiyo
Ingqondo yakho ibeka ithoni yothando olutsalayo. Umntu onesimo sengqondo esihle, ozithembileyo utyekele ekutsaleni abantu abanethemba elifanayo, ngelixa ukungazithembi kunokutsala abanye ababonakalisa ixhala. Nikela ingqalelo kwimpilo-ntle yakho yeemvakalelo. Lungisa nayiphi na imiba engasonjululwanga ukuze ingangeni ebomini bakho bokuthandana. Ukwenza oku,
- Hlakulela impumelelo: Zibandakanye kwizinto ezikwenza wonwabe kwaye uzithembe. Oku kuya kuvuselela amandla alungileyo abonakala eyosulela
- Lungisa ukungakhuseleki: Cinga ngonyango okanye amaqela enkxaso ukuphilisa amanxeba adlulileyo. Xa uphucula ngaphakathi, uyeka ngokwemvelo ukutsala iipatheni ezimbi
- Ukuzithemba kweprojekthi: Sebenza kwisimo, ulwimi lomzimba, kunye nokuzibonakalisa. Utshintsho oluncinci olufana nokujonga amehlo, ukuncuma kunceda abanye babone ukuba ulungile kwaye uvulekile
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Yiba nenjongo kwaye ukhuthale kuPhando lwakho
Uthando alufane luvele ngokulinda nje. Yenza amathuba kwaye usebenze ekudibaneni nabantu. Yandisa i-horizons yakho kwaye ugcine ingqondo evulekileyo njengoko ulandela uthando.
5. Dlala umdlalo wamanani
Ukufumana iqabane elifanelekileyo kunokufuna ukudibana nabantu abaninzi. Phatha ukuthandana njengokufuna umsebenzi. Kanye njengakwindlela yokuzingela umsebenzi, okukhona uqhubeka nodliwano-ndlebe, kokukhona angcono amathuba akho okufika. Ngokunjalo, ekuthandeni, okukhona udibana nabantu abaninzi, kokukhona amathuba akho okuba ngcono ukufumana eyona ilungileyo. Musa ukudimazeka ngenxa yokulahlwa okumbalwa. UShivanya ucebisa ngelithi, “Zinike amathuba amaninzi kangangoko uwafumanayo.” Ngoko,
- Yithi "ewe" kwimihla emininzi. Umntu ngamnye omtsha yinto entsha enokwenzeka
- Yamkela kwaye ufunde ekukhatyweni
- Sebenzisa ii-apps zokuthandana kunye neziganeko zentlalo ukwandisa iinketho, kodwa uthathe ikhefu ukuze ungatshiswa
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6. Musa ukuluyeka uthando kwilishwa
Jonga ngokukhutheleyo uthando endaweni yokucinga ukuba kuya kwenzeka ngamabona-ndenzile. Joyina iimeko apho wena kunye neqabane elinoluvo olufanayo ninokudibana khona. Umzekelo, ukuba ubumoya bubalulekile kuwe, yiya kukucamngca okanye ukuphumla kweyoga. Yandisa amathuba akho okufumana a uqhagamshelwano lomoya nomntu ngenxa yokuba nobabini nikholelwa kuyo kwaye niyakwazi ukuyitsala. Undoqo kukuba,
- Landela umdla wakho. Joyina iiklabhu okanye iiklasi onomdla kuzo, ukuze udibane nabantu abanomdla ofanayo
- Zama amava amatsha. Bhalisela iindibano zocweyo, amaqela okuhamba, okanye iminyhadala yasekuhlaleni apho abantu abangatshatanga bahlanganisana khona
- Musa ukuthembela nje ekuzicingeleni. Yithi ewe kwizimemo. Okukhona uzibeka apho ngaphandle, kokukhona uthando lunokukufumana ngakumbi
7. Beka ecaleni ifowuni yakho kwaye ube khona
Umlutha wefowuni kunye iteknoloji ingamosha uthando. Statistics bonisa ukuba malunga nesiqingatha sabantu bathi iqabane labo lidla ngokuphazanyiswa yifowuni yabo ngexesha lencoko. Ukudibanisa ngokwenene:
- Gxila ngokupheleleyo kumntu ophambi kwakho: thula izaziso kwaye ugcine isixhobo sakho singabonakali ngexesha lemihla
- Ziqhelise ukuphulaphula ngenyameko. Mjonge emehlweni, buza imibuzo elandelayo, kwaye uphendule ngokucingisisayo
- Xa ukho ngokupheleleyo, iintlantsi zinokubhabha ngokwemvelo ngaphandle kokuphazamiseka kwedijithali
8. Cela uncedo kubahlobo nakusapho
Akunyanzelekanga ukuba wenze oku uwedwa. Vumela abahlobo kunye nosapho lwakho bakuncede kukhangelo lwakho. Umhlobo oxhasayo unako dlala i-wingman okanye ukwazisa umntu abamaziyo. Banokunceda kwakhona ukupolisha iprofayile yakho yokuthandana okanye ukunika impendulo enyanisekileyo. Ungakwenza oku ngokuthi,
- Ukucela abahlobo ukuba bakwazise ukuba singles bacinga ukuba ungacofa. Bakwazi kakuhle kwaye banokubona ukuhambelana okuhle
- Yiba nomhlobo akuncede uphucule iprofayile yakho ngokuchola okanye ucofe iifoto zakho okanye upholise iprofayile yakho yokuthandana
- Liphulaphule icebiso labo. Abahlobo bahlala bebona iiflegi ezibomvu ezilumkisayo onokuthi ungazihoyi
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9. Yandisa izangqa zakho zentlalo ngenjongo
Yandisa umnatha wakho ngaphaya kwesihlwele sakho sesiqhelo. Oku kwandisa amathuba akho okudibana nomntu ohambelanayo. Zibeke ngononophelo kwiisetingi ezintsha zentlalo:
- Joyina amaqela anomdla asekuhlaleni okanye iintlanganiso. Oku kunokungqineka kusebenza ngakumbi kunokuswayipha nje kwii-apps
- Phonononga imicimbi yoluntu okanye amathuba amavolontiya. Ezi zilungile ukudibana nabantu ababelana ngeenqobo zakho
- Yamkela izimemo zendibano apho ungaqhele ukuya khona, kwaye wazise abantu ukuba unomdla wokudibana nomntu
10. Sebenzisa uburharha njengolwimi lothando
Uburharha bokwenyani bunokuba ngumagnethi. Ukuhleka okwabelwana ngako kophula umkhenkce kwaye kwakha ubuhlobo. Gcina iincoko zilula kwaye ufefe kwi-wit okanye i-anecdotes ehlekisayo ukubeka umhla wakho ngokukhululeka. Nangona kunjalo, sebenzisa uburharha ngobulumko:
- Ncuma kwaye uhleke rhoqo. Ikwenza ube nomtsalane ngakumbi
- Kuphephe ukuphoxa kakhulu, iziqhulo ezigxekayo okanye a uburharha owomileyo, njengoko ezi zinokuvela zingalunganga
- Sebenzisa ukuqhula okuthambileyo okanye ukwabelana nabanye ngaphakathi kweziqhulo. Ukuhleka kunye kunceda ukwakha ubuhlobo obukhawulezayo kwaye kukwenza ukhumbuleke
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Gcina Imilinganiselo Yakho, Kodwa Hlala Usengqiqweni
Ukucaca malunga nento oyifunayo kulungile, kodwa iinjongo ezingenakuguquguquka zinokubuyisela umva. Jonga ulungelelwaniso phakathi kwezinto zakho ezingaxoxisiyo kunye nengqondo evulekileyo.
11. Yazi into oyifunayo
Phinda ujonge izinto ezibalulekileyo kuwe. Ukuba ufuna uthando lokwenyaniso, yenza isigqibo malunga nokuba yimincili okanye ubambiswano oluzinzileyo lubaluleke ngakumbi. Ngaba uphupha ngothando lwentsomi, okanye ngaba uyakuxabisa ukuzibophelela kwexesha elide? Ukucaca kunceda ukujolisa uphendlo lwakho. Ungakwenza oku ngoku:
- Ukuchaza iimpawu ezifunwayo: Ngaba ukuba nobudlelwane obunomdla yeyona nto iphambili, okanye ufuna umntu ozakwakha naye ubomi?
- Uluhlu okufuneka ube nalo xa uthelekiswa nezinto ezintle: Umzekelo, "kufuneka ufune abantwana" kwaye "kumnandi ukuba bayakuthanda ukukhwela intaba". Sebenzisa olu luhlu ukucoca iinketho zakho.
- Yigcine ngoku: Ubomi buyatshintsha, kwaye kunye nayo, iinjongo zakho zobudlelwane nazo, nazo. Lungisa into oyijongayo njengoko ukhula
Isishwankathelo soshicilelo lweYouTube
Le ntetho iphonononga ukuba kutheni ubudlelwane bale mihla buziva bunzima ngakumbi kunangaphambili. Isithethi sicacisa ukuba imibutho yemveli yayikhe yabonelela ngeendima nemithetho ecacileyo, ngelixa “imibutho yothungelwano” yanamhlanje ixhomekeke kuthethathethwano oluqhubekayo nokutshintsha kolindelo. Ngoku sijonge ekuthandeni nasekusebenzeleni ubuni, intsingiselo, kunye nokuzaliseka, okuphakamisa uxinzelelo kuzo zombini. Bagxininisa ukuba ubudlelwane obuhlala buhlala bufuna ukulinganisa okulindelweyo, ukungathembeli kwiqabane elinye kuyo yonke into, kunye nokuzisa amava amatsha ekwabelwana ngawo. Incoko iphinda igxininise ukuba ukuzikhulisela kwenzeka ngobudlelwane, hayi ukuba wedwa, kwaye ukukhetha iqabane kukwakha ibali lobomi kunye, hayi nje ukuleqa ibali lothando. Jonga kude kube sekupheleni ukuze ufumane ulwazi malunga nokuba ungagxila kwintoni xa ufuna iqabane elifanelekileyo.
12. Funa ubambiswano, hayi inkanuko
Uthando lokwenene ludibanisa umtsalane nobuhlobo kunye nenkxaso. Khangela umntu owongeza uzinzo nokuqonda ebomini bakho, hayi nje imincili. Shivanya uyacacisa, “Uthando lokwenene lubonisa imvisiswano, uxolo nentlonelo engaphaya kwentlantsi yokuqala.” Ukuqinisekisa ukuba unayo loo nto nomntu okuye okanye othandana naye, kufuneka:
- Jonga ukuhambelana: Ngaphandle komtsalane, ngaba uyabelana xabiso e ngundoqo njengendlela yokunxibelelana, imikhwa yemali, okanye usukelo lwentsapho?
- Khawucinge ngekamva: Ngaba uyanibona nobabini nonwabile kunye kubomi bemihla ngemihla, hayi nje kwi-honeymoon?
- Xabiso ngokweemvakalelo: Intlonipho nokukhathalelana kudla ngokuxela kwangaphambili uthando oluhlala luhleli ngaphezu koqhushululu
13. Misela imilinganiselo esempilweni
Imigangatho ikugcina ekuzinziseni, kodwa ukuba nolindelo olufanelekileyo kunokukumisela ukuphoxeka. Kubalulekile ukuvuma ukuba bonke ubudlelwane bujongene nemingeni.
"Okulindelweyo kuyaphuma esandleni kuba asize sifumane imbono eyinyani malunga nendlela ubudlelwane obumele bubukeke ngayo. Xa abantu bengena kubo, abazi ukuba ubudlelwane bunokwehla kangakanani na ngexesha lobunzima. Kufuneka uqikelele okulindelekileyo kuwe, nakwiqabane. Oko kukuvumela ukuba ubambelele kubudlelwane ngamaxesha anzima, kunokuba uyeke rhoqo emva koko."
-Shivanya Yogmayaa, ubudlelwane kunye nomqeqeshi wobudlelwane obusondeleyo
Ngenxa yoko, kufuneka:
- Gxininisa kumaxabiso angundoqo: Zimiseleni kukuhloniphana, ukunyaniseka nobubele. Ezi non-negotiables ukuba yenza ubudlelwane bube nempilo
- Yamkela ukungafezeki: Qonda ukuba awukho wena okanye nabani na ongenasiphako. Misela imigangatho ebhetyebhetye yeempawu ezincinci
- Zilungiselele ukukhulisa: Khumbula, ubudlelwane bukhula ngomzamo. Ukuba nolindelo olufanelekileyo kukunceda ukuba usebenze ngamabala arhabaxa endaweni yokuba uhambe
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14. Zilumkele iintsomi ezingekho ngqiqweni
Iingcamango ezithandwayo ngothando zihlala zilula kakhulu izinto eziyinyaniso. Ingcamango yokuba "izichasi zikhanga" zilungile kwiimuvi, kodwa ebomini bokwenene, ukungafani okukhulu kunokubangela ukungqubuzana. Ulwalamano oluzinzileyo ludla ngokuphumelela kwizinto ezifanayo, ngoxa iyantlukwano esisiseko idla ngokuba kukungqubana. Ukuba uyazibuza ukuba ungalufumana njani uthando, kufuneka,
- Funa izinto enivumelana ngazo. Izinto enizithandayo ekwabelwana ngazo, imvelaphi, okanye iinjongo zobomi zinceda ubudlelwane buhlale
- Lumkela iintsomi “zentlantsi”. I-chemistry ekhawulezayo iyonwabisa, kodwa uthando oluhlala luhleli lwakhiwe ekuqondeni ixesha
- Gxininisa kuqhagamshelwano lokwenene, hayi uluhlu lokukhangela intsomi
Yiphephe Imigibe Evala Uthando
Iingqondo ezithile kunye nemikhwa iya kubagxotha abanokuba ngamaqabane. Qaphela ukuphelelwa lithemba, uloyiko, kunye namaxesha angeyonyani. Zinokuthintela imigudu yakho yokufumana uthando lokwenene.
15. Musa ukuphelelwa lithemba
Ukuzilahlela akuthandeki. Ukuba uthe phithi kukungatshati, ungadibana njengomntu osweleyo kwaye unexhala, nto leyo ebeka ecaleni.
"Xa umntu enqwenela ukufumana uthando lokwenyani, uba yintswelo, anamathele kakhulu, kwaye abonise izinto zakudala. ukuziphatha ngokubambelela. Ukuphelelwa lithemba kwakhona kubonisa ukungazithembi. Xa ungazithembanga, uye ungabi nazintloni kwaye unganqweneleki. Ukuthintela oku, kufuneka wazi ukuba ufanelekile. Nokuba waliwe, ayikokuphela kwehlabathi. Ungaze ubambelele emntwini kuba usoyika ukuba awuzukufumana mntu wumbi.:
-Shivanya Yogmayaa, ubudlelwane kunye nomqeqeshi wobudlelwane obusondeleyo
Ngoku, unokuba uyazibuza ukuba ungaziphepha njani zonke ezi patheni zingalunganga. Nanga amacebiso ambalwa:
- Gxila kuwe. Landela izinto ozithandayo kunye nabahlobo ukuze ulonwabo lwakho lungabotshwanga ngokupheleleyo ekufumaneni iqabane
- Ukuba ixhala liyangena, zikhumbuze ukuba unokhetho kwaye ubomi abukho ugqatso lokutshatana
- Landela amabhongo akho. Ukutyala amandla kwiinjongo zakho kunye nezinto ozonwabisa ngazo kukwenza uzithembe ngakumbi kwaye ungabi nathemba, nto leyo ikwenza ube nomtsalane kwabanye.
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16 Musa ukufuna uthando ngenxa yoloyiko okanye isithukuthezi
Ukuthandana ngaphandle kwexhala, nokuba kubangelwa kukoyika ukuba wedwa okanye iwotshi ekhatshwayo, ihlala ikhokelela ekukhetheni kakubi. UShivanya ulumkisa ngelithi, “Ukukhangela umntu ngenxa yokoyika kunokukukhokelela ekubeni wenze izigqibo ngokungxama.” Endaweni yokukhathazeka malunga nendlela yokufumana uthando okanye ukulahlekelwa bubuthongo ngenxa yemibuzo efana nale, "Ngaba ndiya kuze ndilufumane uthando?",
- Hlakulela ukwaneliseka: Hlala ukhululekile ukuba ungatshatanga kwaye uxabise ukuzimela kwakho. Uthando luya kuba yibhonasi, kungekhona imfuneko
- Yithathe kancinci: Musa ukutsibela kubudlelwane nje ukuze uvale isithuba. Umntu ofanelekileyo uya kufaneleka ukulinda
- Gcina imbono: Zikhumbuze ukuba ukothuka kukhokelela ekuzisoleni. Lindela umntu ofaneleka ngokwenene
17. Musa ukubophelela uthando kwizinto ezibalulekileyo
Iinjongo zobomi ezinjengomtshato ngama-30, abantwana ngama-32, kunokubangela ukuba uzinze kwakamsinya. Ukusukela imihla ebekiweyo engafanelekanga kunokukufaka kumgibe kubudlelwane obungalunganga. Khumbula,
- Ixesha lomntu wonke lahlukile. Indlela yakho eya eluthandweni akufuneki ihambelane neyomnye umntu
- Qhubeka uphila ubomi obupheleleyo. Landela ikhondo lomsebenzi, uhambo, kunye nokukhula kwakho ngelixa ujonge uthando. Ezi zinto zenza ubomi bakho bube mnandi kwaye zisenokukunceda udibane nomntu okhethekileyo
- Hlala uvulekile. Uthando luhlala lubonakala xa ungalulindelanga, ngoko ke ungakhathazeki xa kudlula izinto ezibalulekileyo kuwe
18. Zilumkele ubuqhophololo be-intanethi kunye neeflegi ezibomvu
Yiba nolwazi kwaye ube nolwazi nge iingozi online ukuthandana. Zikhusele kubuqhophololo kwaye ubeke ingqalelo kwiimpawu ezilumkisayo kulo naliphi na iqabane elinokubakho. Nazi izinto ezimbalwa ekufuneka uzikhumbule:
- Lumka kwi-intanethi: Ungaze uthumele imali, wabelane ngeenkcukacha zakho, okanye iifoto ezisondeleyo nomntu osandul' ukudibana naye kwi-intanethi. Soloko uqinisekisa isazisi phambi kokuba uqhubele phambili izinto
- Khangela iiflegi ezibomvu: Zilumkele iimpawu ezilumkisayo ezifana nemilinganiselo emibini, unxibelelwano olungaguquguqukiyo, ukungahloneli imida, ukuthetha kakubi malunga nowangaphambili, kunye nokuqhunyiswa kwebhombu ngothando okanye ukuhamba ngokukhawuleza. Zonke ezi zizibhengezo zenkathazo ezantsi kumgca
- Mamela ithuku lakho: Ukuba kukho into evakala ilungile kakhulu ukuba ibe yinyani okanye ukuba kukho umntu olawulayo, thabatha inyathelo. Ulwalamano oluphilileyo lufuna ukunyaniseka nentlonipho
UkuFunda okuFanayo: Ngaba Ndikulungele Ubudlelwane? Iimpawu ezili-13 zokuba ukulungele ukwamkela uthando
Yamkela Uthando Xa Lufika
Xa ekugqibeleni ufumana umntu okhethekileyo, khulisa unxibelelwano. Ezi ngcebiso zokufumana uthando zikunceda uqaphele ikhemistri yokwenyani kwaye wakhe iqhina elihlala lihleli.
19. Thembela kwithuku lakho xa uyifumana
Ngamanye amaxesha, uyazi nje. Xa umntu ekulungele ngokwenene, uya kuziva ufanelekile ngokwendalo emathunjini akho. UShivanya uthi, “Xa umntu ofanelekileyo esiza ebomini bakho, uyangena nje. Ukuba ubuzibuza ukuba ungazi njani na ukuba umfumene umntu othandana naye, uhlala ephendula intuition yakho ngaphambi kokuba ingqiqo iyenze. Ngoko,
- Qaphela intuthuzelo kunye nokukhululeka. Ninokuthelekelela ubomi kunye ngaphandle kokubunyanzela
- Jonga ngaphaya kwemincili. Uqhagamshelo lokwenyani luhlala luziva luzolile kwaye lulungile, hayi nje ukugcwala kweadrenaline
- Ukuba ilizwi lakho langaphakathi kunye nabahlobo bayavuma ukuba lo mntu ucofa, musa ukucinga kakhulu. Xa kuvakala kulungile, kulungele ukutsiba
20. Yamkela ukungafezeki
Akukhomntu ogqibelele. Wena, iqabane lakho, akukho mntu. Yamkele le nyaniso:
- Yabelana ngobuthathaka: Vuselela ukuba sesichengeni ngokuvuma ii-quirks zakho, njengoncumo olugwenxa okanye ukuhleka okungathandekiyo, kunokwenza iqabane lakho lizive likhuselekile ukwenza okufanayo.
- Gxininisa kumandla: Kunokuba ujonge iimpazamo ezincinane, xabisa iimpawu ezintle zomnye nomnye
- Ziqhelise uvelwano: Ukuba uyakunyamezela ukungafezeki kwakho, uya kubaxolela ngakumbi iqabane lakho.
21. Yiba ukulungele ukutyala imali othandweni
Ubudlelwane obunentsingiselo buthatha umsebenzi. Ukuba ufuna uthando luhlale luhleli, zilungiselele ukuzityala imali. Ixesha lakho, iimvakalelo zakho, kunye nenxalenye yakho. Impendulo yendlela yokwenza uthando luhlale okanye indlela yokufumana uthando oluhlala luhleli:
- Ukwenza ixesha kunye neqabane lakho. Yibeke phambili imihla, izijekulo ezicingayo, kunye nokujongana rhoqo
- Ukunxibelelana ngokuphandle. Yabelana ngeemvakalelo zakho, mamela ngenyameko, kwaye Sombulula iingxabano ngendlela ephilileyo nekhulileyo. Unxibelelwano oluqinileyo lomeleza uthando
- Ukubeka umgudu. Thembeka kwaye ube nenkathalo. Utyalo-mali oluncinci lwemihla ngemihla olufana neetekisi, ukwanga, kunye noncedo ngemisebenzi yakha ukuthembana kunye nobudlelwane obusondeleyo
FAQs
Ukufumana uthando emva kweminyaka yokuba ungatshatanga kuqala ngokuzazi. Sebenza ekwakheni ukuzithemba, ukwandisa izangqa zakho zentlalo, kwaye uthi ewe kumathuba amatsha. Musa ukucinga ngexesha elidluleyo. Gxininisa ekukhuleni, kwizinto zokuzonwabisa, nakwizinto ezikwenza wonwabe. Uthando luhlala lubonakala xa uphila ngokuzeleyo, hayi xa ululindele ngexhala.
Ngokuqhelekileyo uya kuziva uthuthuzelekile kwaye ukhululekile, kungekhona nje imincili. Umntu othandana naye uziva ngathi likhaya. Unokuba nguwe ngaphandle koloyiko lwesigwebo. Khangela iimpawu ezifana nokuhloniphana, ukhuseleko lweemvakalelo, kunye neenqobo ezisemgangathweni ekwabelwana ngazo. Ukuba nobabini niyakhuthazana ukuba nikhule ngelixa nisamkela iziphene, amathuba okuba nifumene iqhina elihlala lihleli elifanele ukukhuliswa.
Isenokuvakala inzima ngakumbi into yokuba imibutho yasekuhlaleni iyancipha ngenxa yokwaluphala, yaye abantu badla ngokuthwala iimbopheleleko ezingakumbi. Kodwa abantu abaninzi bafumana unxibelelwano olunentsingiselo ngakumbi kamva ebomini ngenxa yokuba bezazi ngcono. Gxininisa kubunyani, ukucaca malunga neenjongo zakho, kunye neemeko apho abantu abanengqondo efanayo bahlangana khona. Khumbula, ukuqola kudla ngokudala ubudlelwane obunamandla, obunempilo, kunye nobunenjongo.
Ukuhambelana akukho malunga nokugqibelela kodwa malunga nokulungelelaniswa. Qala ngokwazi izinto zakho ezingaxoxisiyo, ukusuka kumaxabiso akho ukuya kwiinjongo zobomi kunye nezinto ozikhethayo zokuphila. Khangela umntu owongeza ixabiso ebomini bakho kwaye ngokuphambeneyo. Umahluko omncinci ulungile, kodwa ukuba iinkolelo zakho ezingundoqo ziyangqubana, ukuvisisana kwexesha elide kunokuba nzima. Khetha umntu ozalisekisa uhambo lwakho, hayi nje ukuba ube nemincili ngelo xesha.
Kuphephe ukuphelelwa lithemba, izigqibo ezisekelwe kuloyiko, kunye nokungxamela ukuhlangabezana nezinto ezibalulekileyo ezinjengomtshato kwiminyaka ethile. Musa ukukholisa umntu ngenxa nje yokubaleka isithukuthezi. Kwakhona, qaphela iiflegi ezibomvu ezifana nokuziphatha okungahambelaniyo, imilinganiselo emibini, okanye ukulawula izimo zengqondo. Eyona mpazamo inkulu kukunqumama ukukhula kwakho ngelixa ukhangela. Hlala uphila ngokupheleleyo; uthando kufuneka longezelele kubomi bakho, hayi endaweni yalo.
Iimpawu eziphambili
- Uthando luqala ngawe. Khulisa ukuzithemba kwakho kuqala. Izifundo zibonisa ukuba ikhokelela kubudlelwane obonwabisayo
- Yandisa izangqa zentlalo, uthi ewe kwimihla, kwaye ucele abahlobo okanye amaqela ukuba adibane nabantu abanengqondo efanayo
- Yazi into oyifunayo kwaye ubambelele kumaxabiso ekwabelwana ngawo. Oku kungundoqo ekucingeni indlela yokufumana iqabane elihambelanayo
- Kuphephe ukuphelelwa lithemba, uloyiko, okanye amaxesha abekiweyo. Hlala uphila ngokupheleleyo kwaye uthembe uhambo lwendlela yokuhlangabezana nothando lobomi bakho
- Ukuba kuvakala kulungile kwaye kungokwemvelo, nika uthando ithuba. Iimvakalelo zakho zamathumbu kunye nentuthuzelo zizikhokelo ezinamandla
- Ukuba usabuza "indlela yokufumana uthando", khumbula ukuba uthando luhlala lufumana abo baphila ubomi babo obungcono. Qala ngokuzithanda kwaye uhlale ukhuthele.
Iingcinga Final
Khumbula, ukufumana uthando luhambo. Ukuba ikhe ivakalelwe ngamandla, uncedo luyafumaneka. Iphaneli yeBonobology yabanyangi abanamava inokukukhokela kwimingeni yokuthandana kwaye ujongane nalo naliphi na ixhala ozivayo. Unokuzifumana uzibuza indlela yokufumana iqabane lakho lomphefumlo okanye indlela yokufumana uthando lokwenene - ngenkxaso efanelekileyo kunye nezi ngcebiso ezisebenzayo, unokuguqula loo mbuzo ube yinyani yakho. Awunyanzelekanga ukuba uhambe ngale nto wedwa. Nabani na osabuza ukuba "ndilufumana njani uthando", khumbula ukuba ukuthatha la manyathelo kwaye uhlale unyanisekile kuwe yindlela eya kuthando olufaneleyo.
Indlela Yokuqala Ukuthandana: Iingcebiso zabaqalayo kunye nabaQalayo kwakhona
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Ukuqala Ubudlelwane Obutsha? Nazi izinto ezingama-21 oKwenziwayo nezingaManzi ukuNcedisa
Umnikelo wakho awuquki isisa umnikelo. Iya kuvumela i-Bonobology ukuba iqhubeke nokukuzisela ulwazi olutsha nolwangoku kwiphulo lethu lokunceda nabani na osehlabathini ukuba afunde ukwenza nantoni na.
