15 Ngā Tohu Pono e Pai Ana Tō Wahine Ki Tētahi Tāne

Tērā pea kei te whakakakahu rawa ia i mua i tana haerenga atu, he rite rānei te matao o tana reo ki te mīti i roto i te pouaka tio. Ina kite koe he mea kē kei te haere, mā ngā tohu e pai ana te wahine ki tētahi atu tāne ka āwhina i a koe ki te whakautu i ngā pātai katoa e hiahiatia ana e koe. Engari anō, ehara i te mea ngāwari ki te hopu i aua pātai katoa.

Tērā pea ka mea ia kei te pai ngā mea katoa, ā, ka riri ia i ia wā ka pātai atu koe ki a ia mēnā kei te pai ia. He pono, i ētahi wā ka ārahi tō hinengaro mataku ki te peke atu i te pū, ka tīmata ki te kite i ngā tohu kei te tinihanga tō wahine, kei te tuku karere rānei tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne nā te mea he aroha tōna ki a ia, ahakoa kāore. Tērā pea he mea rerekē kei te whakararuraru i a ia. Nō reira, ki te kore koe e whai taunakitanga e hiahia ana ia ki tētahi atu, me tino whakapono koe ki a ia.

Hei kimi i taua taunakitanga, me titiro matatau koe, kaua hoki e whakapae me te mea kei te tirotiro tonu koe i a ia. Kei te pekepeke noa koe ki te whakatau, me aro nui atu rānei koe ki te kare ā-roto e kore e taea e koe te whakakore? Me titiro tātou ki ngā tohu o te wahine kua moe tāne e aroha ana ki tētahi atu tāne, kia kitea ai e koe ngā whakautu, i tētahi ara, i tētahi ara rānei. I taua wā anō, he mea nui hoki kia mārama koe ki te pūtake o tēnei hiahia ki tētahi atu tāne.

5 Ngā Take e Arohia ai te Wahine Kua Mārenatia ki tētahi atu Tāne

Ahakoa ngā tohu tino ngaro e aroha ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, e hiahia ana rānei ki tētahi atu tāne, ka taea te whakararu i tō kōrua marena. Ahakoa kāore e taea te whakakore he mea tino mamae tēnei, he maha ngā wā, he tohu tēnei o tētahi mea hē i roto i tō kōrua whanaungatanga, i te oranga whānui rānei o tō wahine. Nō reira, ki te whakapae koe kua hiahia tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, kei te pupuri rānei i ōna kare ā-roto ki tētahi atu, me āta tirohia te pūtake o ēnei kare ā-roto.

Ka taea e tēnei te āwhina nui ki te whakatau i te pānga o tēnei raruraru ki te heke mai o tō whanaungatanga. Heoi anō, ehara i te mea e tika ana kia pakaru tō marena, kia kore rānei e arahi ngā kare ā-roto o tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne ki te puremu. Ahakoa ka pērā, ehara i te mea kāore e taea te neke atu i tēnā. Inaa, e whakaatu ana tētahi rangahau a Gallup e 31% o ngā kaiuru i kī kāore rātou e whakarere mena ka kitea e rātou kei te moepuku tā rātou hoa rangatira.

Nō reira, ahakoa te āhua pōuri o te āhuatanga i te tīmatanga, ka kitea e koe he huarahi hei whakaoti i tēnei raruraru. Mā te mōhio ki te pūtake o te huringa o ngā kare ā-roto o tō wahine ka māmā ake te tukanga. Nō reira, i mua i te tūhuratanga i ngā tohu e pai ana te wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, me ngana tātou ki te mārama ki ngā take pea kei muri. He tohu tēnei mō te korenga o te whakatutukitanga i roto i te whanaungatanga tuatahi? Kei roto koe i tētahi marena kāore i te harikoa, he take kē atu rānei hei whakapae? Kia rapua e tātou.

1. Te kupu whakaari mō te ahuareka o te moepuku 

Pērā i ngā tāne, e whakaatu ana ngā rangahau ka taea hoki e ngā wāhine te whai wāhi ki te puremu hei whakahari i te moepuku. Heoi, he mea nui kia mōhio ahakoa kei te kōrero te wahine kua moe tāne ki tētahi atu tāne, ehara i te mea kei te mahi ia i tēnei hei tinihanga i tana hoa rangatira. Ahakoa rā, ko tētahi o ngā take ka tīmata ai ia ki te pai ki tētahi atu ehara i tana hoa rangatira ko te oati pea mō te whakahari i te moepuku - i te iti rawa rānei ko te mea ngaro o taua mea.

2. Kua mate pōturi te whanaungatanga piripono i roto i te marena

Ki te kore he whanaungatanga piripono i roto i te marena , ka iti haere pea tō kōrua whanaungatanga ki te whanaungatanga o ngā hoa noho e rua e moe tahi ana i ētahi wā. Ki te arotahi ngā kōrero a te tokorua ki ngā mahi o te whare me ā rāua kawenga tahi, he tohu tēnei kei te kore he whanaungatanga piripono, ā, he take tēnei hei āwangawanga.

E ai ki ngā rangahau, e rapu ana ngā wāhine i ngā hoa aroha hei tāpiri i ā rātou whanaungatanga matua, kaua hei whakamutu. Ki te whakapono ia ka taea te whakaea te korenga o te whanaungatanga piripono e te tuatoru, koinei pea te take i piri ai tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, i aroha rānei ki tētahi atu. 

3. Te kore o te whakapau kaha 

I ētahi wā, ka kino te haerenga o te marena mēnā kāore i te ōrite te kaha. He mea nui te kaha i roto i te whanaungatanga kia mau tonu ai, ā, ina kore rawa te hoa rangatira e kaha ki te poipoi i te here o te marena, ka kitea te mura o te koretake. Ka nui ake te tūponotanga ka piri tahi tō wahine me tētahi atu tāne, ka whanake rānei ōna kare ā-roto mō tētahi atu tangata mēnā kua whakaatu tonu koe i te kore hiahia me te kaha.

4. Te memeha haere o te kare ā-roto o te aroha 

Ka rerekē te aroha o tētahi ki tētahi i roto i te marena. Mā ngā kare ā-roto kaha, whānui hoki ka whakatakoto i te ara mō tētahi hononga haumaru, pono hoki. Engari ina tīmata te ngaro o te aroha me te aroha, ka uaua haere ngā āhuatanga. Ina memeha haere te aroha i roto i te marena, ka ngana pea tētahi, tētahi rānei, ki te kimi i tētahi atu mea.  

5. Te harikoa, te FOMO, te whaia 

Ahakoa i roto i te marena harikoa, angitu hoki , ka taea e te harikoa o te mahi i tetahi mea tapu te tino whakawai. Tērā pea ka tīmata te wahine ki te pai ki tētahi atu tāne, ka nui ake te harikoa i te wā e pai ana ki a ia. Kātahi ka puta te wehi kei ngaro atu i ētahi atu wheako. I ētahi wā, ka ahua matomato ake te tarutaru i waho o te taiapa o te marena kotahi. Ā, koinei te wā ka tīmata te puta o ngā tohu e pai ana te wahine ki tētahi atu tāne.

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15 Ngā Tohu Pono e Pai Ana Tō Wahine Ki Tētahi Tāne

Nā te mea kua mōhio koe ki ngā take e hiahia ai te wahine kua moe ki tētahi atu tāne, tera pea kei te āwangawanga koe mō te hauora o tō marena. Kaua e manukanuka, ahakoa kei te whakaaro koe kei te pāngia tō marena e te korenga o te whanaungatanga piripono , kua mutu rānei te mahi tahi, ehara i te mea kua tino pōrearea kē (ahakoa me mahi pea).

Ahakoa rā, kia tino mōhio ai koe ki te āhua o tō raruraru, he mea pai kia mōhio koe ki ngā tohu e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne. Mā te tere o tō mōhio ki ngā mea hei rapu, ka pai ake. Me titiro tātou ki ngā tohu e whakaatu ana kei te aro atu tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, me tōna aroha pea: 

1. He tawhiti ia 

E tuhituhi ana tā mātou kaipānui, a Andrew, nō Texas, "I kite ahau i taku wahine e takaro ana ki tētahi hoa mahi, ā, kāore anō kia taea e au te whakakore i tēnei kare ā-roto e pai ana ia ki a ia. Mō ngā marama kua taha ake nei, kua roa ia e hoki mai ana i te mahi. I te nuinga o ngā wiki mutunga, he mahi āna hei mahi māna. Ahakoa i te tina, kei te pukumahi ia i runga i te waea. Kāore au i te kite i a ia, kāore hoki au e kōrero ki a ia i ēnei rā."

E kīia ana, ka tirotirohia e ngā wāhine te hinengaro i mua i te mahi tinana. I mua noa atu i te kitenga o ngā tohu tinana kua moe tāne tō wahine me tētahi atu (mēnā he moe tāne), ka puta te āhua o te momotu me te korenga o te whanaungatanga. Mena he aroha tōna ki tētahi atu tāne, ko tōna āhua whānui ki a koe he tino kore aro.

Ki te kore e taea e koe te whakarērea te whakaaro kua mau te aroha o tō wahine ki tētahi atu, whakaarohia ko tēhea te wā whakamutunga i kōrero hōhonu ai kōrua tetahi ki tetahi? Ko tētahi o ngā tohu nui e aroha ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu, kua puta rānei te aroha ki tētahi atu tāne, ko te āhua tawhiti o tōna ngākau, me te mea kāore anō kia piripono kōrua ki a ia i te tuatahi.

2. Ngā waea ngaro me ngā tuhinga kore whakautua: Kua pāngia te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero

Ki te mea kei te whakatutukihia ōna hiahia kare ā-roto mā te tuatoru, kāore te ngana ki te whakaara anō i tētahi mea i roto i te whanaungatanga tuatahi i te tihi o tana rārangi mahi. Ko tētahi o ngā tohu mārama e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne ko te kore ia e kōrero ki a koe pērā i mua, kāore rānei ia e kōrero nui ki a koe.

Ko te wahine hihiko i mōhiotia e koe i mua, i kōrero mai ki a koe mō ngā mea katoa e pā ana ki tana mahi i ia rā, inaianei ka kōrero noa ki a koe ina hiahiatia he kōrero mō ngā take o te whare. Tērā pea te āhua nei kāore kōrua e tuwhera ana tetahi ki tetahi, kāore rānei e taea e kōrua te kōrero. Ina kore he whakawhitiwhiti kōrero i roto i te whanaungatanga , he raruraru nui atu i te āhua nei.

3. Kāore rawa e whakaaetia tana waea 

Ahakoa me tirotiro e koe te mapi, me waea atu rānei ki tētahi, me rapu noa rānei i tētahi mea i runga i te Google, me whakapono koe kāore tana waea e tika ana kia rawekehia. Kāore ia e waiho kia takoto noa, ā, kua rite te uaua o tana kupuhipa ki ngā waehere whakarewatanga karihi. Koinei tētahi o ngā tohu tino mārama kei te tinihanga tāu wahine, i te iti rawa i roto i te hinengaro.

Ki te tono koe i tana waea, tera pea ka noho ia ki a koe kia kore ai koe e kite i tetahi mea e kore e hiahiatia e ia kia kite koe. Kāore ia e tuku i tana waea ki a koe kia tirohia ngā whakaahua, engari ka mea noa ia, "Kei te tukuna atu e au ki a koe." Ki te mea kei te tuku karere tāu wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, ā, kei te huna e ia, ka tiakina e ia tana waea. Nō reira, ki te mea kei te whakamahi ia i tana waea, pērā i te taiohi i kite i te Snapchat, whakaarohia koinei tētahi o ngā tohu e pai ana tāu wahine ki tētahi atu tāne.

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4. Ka teka ia, ka nui rawa rānei tana utu 

Ina aroha tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, ā, ka ngana ki te huna i taua mea, tera pea ka huri ia ki te kōrero teka. Tērā pea ka teka ia mō tōna wāhi noho, mō ngā taipitopito rānei o tētahi tangata i kōrerotia e ia. Tērā pea ka kōrero ia i ngā taipitopito whakamiharo mō ia mea, ā, ki te mea kāore e taea te kī he teka. Engari ki te kore e taea e koe te whakakore i te whakaaro kei te aroha tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, mā te aro nui ki ngā taipitopito ka tata atu koe ki te pono.

Ina hoki, ina teka te tangata i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga , me mahara ia ki tāna i teka ai, me te wā hoki. Whakahuatia anō i te wiki i muri mai, ka mātakitaki i a ia e ngana ana ki te āwhina i a ia kia puta i taua raruraru. Ki te mau ia i roto i tētahi teka, he tohu tērā pea kāore ō whakapae i te koretake.

5. Ko te tohu nui rawa atu kei te pai tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne: Ko te ora me te kore koe he mea nui ake 

Tērā pea ka pau katoa ana wiki mutunga ki te taha o ōna hoa, ā, ko aua 'haerenga pakihi' kua kīia kētia nei te āhua nei ka puta i ngā wā e rua i te marama. Ahakoa kei te kāinga ia, ko ngā mahi whakangahau kāore koe i mōhio kei a ia, ka pau te nuinga o tōna wā. I taua wā tonu, ka ahua kore e taea te makona i tana hiahia mō te wāhi whaiaro, ā, ka waiho koe kia whakaaro, " E hia te nui o te wāhi i roto i te whanaungatanga he mea noa ?" Tērā pea tētahi o ngā tohu kei te aroha tō wahine ki tētahi atu, kei te pirangi rānei ki tētahi atu tāne.

"Kua kite ahau i taku wahine e takaro ana ki tētahi atu tāne, kāore ia i te kāinga, ā, i a ia e noho ana, ka noho tonu ia i roto i te rūma ako mō ngā hui nui. Ka meinga ahau e taku hoa kia pōuri," te kōrero a Jonathan ki a mātou, "I mua i taku taea te kōrero ki a ia mō taua mea, kua kōrero mai āna hoa ki ahau mō te mea e tupu ana. Me te mea nei i mōhio te katoa mō taua mea engari ko au anake!"

6. Ka taea e tana reo tinana te kōrero ki a koe i ngā mea katoa e hiahia ana koe ki te mōhio 

Ina kōrero te wahine kua moe tāne ki tētahi atu tāne, ā, ka matara atu i tana hoa rangatira, ka kitea tōna āhua tinana . Ka mātao te ahua o ngā awhi, ka karo pea ia i te titiro kanohi ki a koe, ā, kāore tōna āhua whānui e tino manaaki. I muri i tētahi wā, tera pea ka mataku koe kei te moemoeā tō wahine mō tētahi atu tangata i te wā e moe tāne ana nā te mea kāore i te kitea te ngākau nui.

Ahakoa e mōhio ana ia, kāore rānei, ka kitea tōna koretake (tōna hara rānei) i roto i tana whanonga i a koe. Ko ngā tohu e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne ka kitea pinepine mā te whakaatu i te kore aro ki a koe. Tērā pea ka kitea tēnei kore aro i roto i tana reo tinana i te wā e tata mai ana.

7. Kāore koe e kōrero ana mō te heke mai 

Ko tētahi o ngā tohu tino kitea kei te tuku karere tāu wahine ki tētahi atu tāne nā te mea he aroha tōna ki a ia, ko te kore e taea te whakarite i tō kōrua heke mai. Kua mimiti haere ngā kōrero mō ō kōrua reti, ā, kāore pea kōrua e kōrero ana mō ngā hararei ka taea e kōrua te haere i te tau e tū mai nei.

Ki te mea kei te rapu koe i ngā tohu e aroha ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tangata, tirohia te nui o tā kōrua kōrero mō te heke mai o tō kōrua whanaungatanga . Mena kua mutu kē ia i te marena, kāore ia e aro nui ki tō kōrua heke mai. Nō reira, ki te mea kua kitea e kōrua he whenua hei hoko i ngā tāone iti engari kāore tō hoa e aro nui ana ki tēnā, tera pea tētahi o ngā tohu e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne.

8. Kei te tawai tonu ia ki a koe 

"He aha koe te kore ai e mahi i tetahi mea tika?" "He aha koe i kakahuria ai pērā?" He aha koe i kōrero pērā ai i ēnei rā?" Mena he rite te ahua o tētahi o ēnei, tera pea kei te aro atu koe ki te maha o ngā whakahe tonu e whakaiti ana i a koe. He mea maori te manukanuka, "Kei te pai taku wahine ki tētahi atu tāne?", ina ringihia e ia te whakahawea me te whakahe ki ngā mea katoa e mahia ana e koe, e kōrero ana rānei.

Tērā pea ka amuamu ia mō ngā mea iti e mahia ana e koe hei whakatikatika i a koe hei tangata e arohaina ana e ia, kāore rānei i te tino āta tirotiro ia i ō ngoikoretanga. Ahakoa te take, ko te whakahē tonu me te tautohetohe i roto i te whanaungatanga tētahi o ngā tohu nui o te wahine kua moe tāne e aroha ana ki tētahi atu tāne.

9. He mea pumau te pakanga i roto i tō kōrua marena

Kāore pea ngā raruraru whakawhitiwhiti kōrero e whakaatu i ngā take e pā ana ki a kōrua i tēnei wā. Mēnā ka huri ia kōrero hei tautohe , ā, ka huri ia tautohe hei wiki ārai, he mārama kei te kore e pai te haere o ngā mea. Ko tētahi o ngā tohu e aroha ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu, kua puta rānei ōna kare ā-roto ki tētahi atu tāne, ko te āhua nei kei te ngana ia ki te kimi, ki te waihanga rānei i ngā raruraru i roto i tō kōrua whanaungatanga — hei huarahi pea ki te wehe i a ia i a kōrua.

10. He nui ake tōna wā e noho tahi ana me te whakaata i a koe 

Arā, kua tino rerekē ana tikanga whakapaipai. Tērā pea nā ētahi hua MAC hou i kukume i a ia ki te whakapaipai, kāore i rite i mua. Engari, ki te mea he tohu tēnei e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, tera pea ka tino rerekē ia i ana tikanga whakapaipai.

He whakangungu manawa, he Zumba, he Pilates, he yoga wera, me ērā atu mea katoa, kei te mahi ia i tēnā. Ka nui ake te panoni o āna tauira whakapaipai, ka kitea nuitia. Ā, ki te tukua e koe he kupu whakahihi, "Mō wai koe e whakakakahu ana i a koe?", me kī noa kāore te whakautu e tino pai. 

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11. He 'hoa', he 'hoa mahi' rānei kāore rātou e pai ki te whakauru atu ki a koe 

He kōrero nā Mark, he kaitoi taitamariki, i tata pōrangi ia, "I tino mōhio ahau kei te kōrero taku wahine ki tētahi atu tāne nā te mea i ia rā, i ia pō, i ia pō, ka puta tonu mai te ingoa kotahi i runga i tana mata. Ā, i kite ahau ka tino tupato ia i roto i ōna āhua me āna mahi i ngā wā katoa e waea mai ana taua tangata."

Mena kei te tuku karere tāu wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, ā, kei te huna ia i taua karere, tera pea he hoa ngaro, he hoa mahi rānei kei te noho tahi rāua. Kāore anō koe kia tūtaki ki tēnei tangata, ā, te āhua nei kāore koe e tūtaki wawe. Ina kōrero tētahi wahine kua moe tāne ki tētahi atu tāne, he maha ngā wā, kāore koe e mōhio ko wai kei te noho tahi rāua, ki te kore koe e kite i ngā tohu mārama kei te tuku karere tāu wahine ki tētahi atu tāne. Ka whakaaro tonu tō hoa rangatira kua tawhiti te kare ā-roto ki ō rāua hoa he mea nui ake i a koe.

12. Kei te memeha haere te whanaungatanga piripono i roto i tō marena

Ko te tohu tino mārama e pai ana te wahine ki tētahi atu tāne ko te memeha haere o te whanaungatanga i roto i tō kōrua marena. Ina pupuri ana tō wahine i ngā kare ā-roto mō tētahi atu tangata, ka pā pea ki ngā momo whanaungatanga katoa i waenganui i a kōrua, engari ko te whanaungatanga ā-ira te mea tino pāngia. Ehara i te mea ko te kī kāo ki te moe tāne tētahi o ngā tohu ā-tinana kua moe noa tō wahine me tētahi atu tangata.

Heoi, mō ngā wāhine, ko te hononga kare ā-roto te pūtake o te hiahia moepuku. Mēnā kei te kukume tō wahine i te kare ā-roto ki tētahi atu tāne, ehara i a koe, ka kitea tonutia tēnei i roto i tana hiahia ki te moe tahi me koe — te kore rānei. Koia te take he tohu pea kei te tinihanga kare ā-roto tō wahine, kāore he take mārama, he whakamārama rānei pērā i te ahotea, ngā raruraru hauora, te whānautanga, me ērā atu.

13. Kāore ia i te aroha

Ko te whanaungatanga ā-tinana kore-ira, e tohuhia ana e ngā tohu aroha pēnei i te awhi, te kihi, te awhi, me te pupuri ringa, ko tētahi o ngā pou o te whanaungatanga harikoa me te whai hua. Koinei te mea e hono ana, e hiahiatia ana hoki ngā hoa. Ko te korenga ohorere o te aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga he tohu whero o te tawhiti kare ā-roto me te momotu. Tērā pea nā te mea kua whakatapua te whānuitanga kare ā-roto o tō hoa rangatira ki tētahi atu tangata.

14. Te āhua nei kāore ia i te harikoa i roto i te marena

Ko tētahi atu tohu e whakaatu ana kei te aroha tō wahine ki tētahi atu tangata, ko te āhua nei kāore ia i te harikoa tonu i roto i te marena. Kāore te whakaaro ki te noho tahi me koe mō te rā kotahi e whakahihiri ana i a ia. Kāore he menemene i roto i tōna mata i tētahi pō whakaipoipo aroha. Kāore ia e kata nui ana. He āhua pouri, he āhua pōuri hoki ia, me te mea kei te ngaro tetahi mea i roto i tōna ao. Āe, i te mea kei te kukume mai tētahi atu tāne i ōna ngākau, ehara i te mea uaua ki te kite he aha ia kāore e kite ana i te rangimārie me te ngākau māhorahora i roto i tōna ao me koe.

15. Engari mā te 'tāne kē' ia e hari ai

I tētahi atu taha, ko te 'tāne kē' te pūtake o tōna harikoa. Ka kite koe i te kanapa o te mata o tō wahine ina kite ia i tētahi karere kuputuhi. Nā te waea Zoom i te meneti whakamutunga i te mutunga wiki ka nui ake tōna harikoa i te kai tahi me koe. He puna i roto i ōna hikoi me te waiata i ōna ngutu i a ia e tomo ana i roto i ngā tatau engari ko te ao tūturu o tōna ao ka murua tonutia atu. Ko ēnei huringa whanonga he tohu mārama kei te pai tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne.

Me aha koe ina he kare ā-roto tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne

Mena kua maha rawa ngā tohu kua whitia e koe i roto i te rārangi tohu e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, tera pea kei te āwangawanga koe, kei te manukanuka, "I kite ahau i taku wahine e takaro ana ki tētahi atu tāne, ā, kāore au i te mōhio me aha ahau" me "Kei te pau katoa te wā o taku wahine ki te tuku karere ki tētahi, ā, te āhua nei kua mutu tana marena. Me aha ahau?" Kaua e manukanuka, ehara i te mea kua mutu tō marena . He maha tonu ngā mea ka taea e koe te mahi.

• Kōrero ki tāu wahine: Ko te huarahi pai ki te aro atu ki ō āwangawanga me ō mataku ko te kōrero mōna, engari me whakarite kia tika te huarahi e mahia ana e koe. Kāore e taea e koe te haere me te mura o ngā pū, me te tumanako ka āwhina ngā whakapae me te reo nui i a koe ki te whakatau i te āhuatanga. Ka nui ake te kino o tēnā, nō reira kaua e whakatata atu ki te āhuatanga me te mauahara. Ngāna ki te tīmata i te kōrero me te rangimārie, me te ngana ki te tae ki tētahi whakatau whai hua. Tikina he mōhiohio, whakaarohia ō mahi e whai ake nei, ā, ko te mea nui, ngana kia noho mārire.
• Whakapaua te wā ki te tukatuka: I muri i te kōrero ki tō hoa wahine, me whai wā koe ki te whakaaroaro i ngā kōrero katoa e kōrerohia ana e ia, me te whakaaroaro ki tōna tikanga mōu me tō kōrua whanaungatanga. Hei tauira, ki te whakaae ia he pai ki a ia tētahi atu tāne, me pēhea koe i muri i tēnā? Ki te whakakahoretia rawatia e ia, he aha tāu e hiahia ana ki te mahi i muri mai? Ka taea e koe te whakapono ki a ia, me te whakakore i ēnei feaa? Ki te kore rānei, ka kī tonu koe i ngā mea maha. take whakawhirinaki?
• Te arotahi ki te tiaki whaiaro: He wā tino uaua pea tēnei mōu. Me aro nui koe ki te tiaki i a koe anō, kaua hoki e tukua ngā mataku, ngā āwangawanga, me ngā āwangawanga kia pā kino ki tō oranga ngākau me tō hauora hinengaro. Kia kore ai koe e aro nui ki ngā tohu e pai ana tō hoa wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, ngana ki te whakamahi i ngā mahi whakaū pēnei i te manawa pouaka, te whakamarie i te ngangau i roto i tō hinengaro mā te tuhi i tētahi pukapuka, me te arotahi ki a koe anō mā roto i ngā mahi whakaaroaro.
• Rapua he awhina ngaio: I runga i ngā āhuatanga, kāore pea koe i te tino pai te hinengaro. Mena te āhua nei kāore e taea te kōrero ki tō hoa rangatira me te kore e whakanui i tō reo, tera pea ka pai ake te mahi whakaora mō ngā tāne me ngā wāhine. I roto i te whakaora mō ngā tāne me ngā wāhine, ka taea e tētahi rōpū tuatoru ngaio, kore whakaaro nui, te aromatawai tika i te hē o tō whanaungatanga me te aha ka taea e koe te mahi mōna. Mena kei te āwangawanga koe i ngā tohu e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, ā, kei te rapu āwhina koe, Ngā ratonga tohutohu a Bonobology kei a koe ano.

Nā te mea kua mōhio koe ki ngā tohu e pai ana tō wahine ki tētahi atu tāne, me ngā mea ka taea e koe te mahi mō tēnā, ko te tumanako, kāore koe e tuku i tō marena kia pakaru i mua tonu i ō kanohi. Ahakoa kei te pōuri kē koe, ngana ki te whai i ngā tikanga o tō hoa i mua i te tango i ngā mahi uaua. Kia mōhio koe ki te wāhi e raru ai koe, ka māmā ake te whakatika i ngā raruraru katoa e pā ana ki a koe. 

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Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

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