He moemoeā mā ngā kōtiro katoa kia whai hoa rangatira koe i roto i tō rātou ao, e aroha ana ki a ia mō ōna āhuatanga katoa. Mēnā he tāne koe e whakaipoipo ana, ā, e whakaaro ana koe, "Me pēhea te noho hei hoa tāne pai ake?", mihi nui ki a koe mō te hiahia kia noho hei hoa rangatira e tika ana mā tō hoa wahine. Ehara i te mea onge te whakaaro ki ngā mea pēnei i: He hoa tāne pai ahau? Kei te harikoa ia ki ahau? Me pēhea taku tīmatanga hei hoa tāne pai ake? He aha taku e taea ai hei whakanui i a ia? Ko ēnei pātai katoa e tohu ana kei te aroha koe, kei te whakanui hoki i te tangata kei a koe, ā, kāore koe e hiahia kia whakararuraru tetahi mea i tēnei mea pai kei a kōrua.
Kei te hiahia koe kia harikoa tō hoa wahine, ehara i te mea he herenga engari he aroha nōu ki a ia. Heoi anō, kāore e taea te ora tonu i tētahi whanaungatanga hauora me te hononga pai anake. Me whai whakaaro iti anō hoki, pērā i te pātai atu ki a ia mō tōna rā, me te waea atu ki a ia ki te kī "Aroha ana ahau ki a koe" i waenganui o tētahi rā pukumahi. He aha atu anō tāu e taea ai hei hoa tāne tino pai, hei mea hoki kia motuhake ia, e whakaaro ana koe? E 25 ngā tohutohu ngāwari, whai hua hoki e wātea ana ki a koe, ā, e kore e hē te whakamahi.
25 Ngā Tohutohu Māmā engari Whai Hua mō te Noho hei Hoa Tāne Pai Ake
Ripanga o Ihirangi
I mua i te whakautu i tēnei pātai, me pātai atu mātou ki a koe i ētahi pātai. Ki tāu whakaaro, he aha ngā ngā āhuatanga o te hoa paiHe aha āna mahi ki tētahi hoa wahine? He aha tāu whakamāramatanga mō tētahi whanaungatanga harikoa, ora, me te tino pai? Mā te kimi i ngā whakautu ki ēnei pātai ka taea e koe te noho hei hoa tāne pai rawa atu.
Hei āwhina i a koe i taua haerenga kia noho hei hoa tāne pai rawa atu o te ao (i roto i tō whanaungatanga), ka ārahi koe i roto i ngā āhuatanga me ngā āhuatanga o tētahi hoa tāne aroha me te manaaki. Ā, tohaina hoki ngā tohutohu e 25 hei āwhina i a koe kia noho hei hoa tāne aroha, kia rongo ai tō hoa wahine he aroha, he motuhake hoki ia.
1. Whakautehia ia
Me tīmata tātou ki tētahi o ngā mea māmā rawa e tika ana kia waiho hei kaupapa matua i roto i te ngā whanaungatanga kaha, hauora hoki — te whakaute. Ko te whakaute i roto i te whanaungatanga he whakaae hohonu kei ia tangata te uara, te whakaaro nui, me te tirohanga ahurei e whakarei ake ana i te hononga. Mā tēnei ka waihangahia he wāhi e tupu ai te aroha, e whakatakoto ana i te ara mō te māramatanga me te tipu. Anei ngā huarahi e rima hei whakanui ake i tō whakaute ki tō hoa, ā, hei whakapai ake i a koe hei hoa tāne::
- Whakarongo kaha: Kia aro nui, kia whai wāhi atu hoki ina kōrero ia, me te whakanui i ōna whakaaro me ōna kare ā-roto me te kore e whakakorekore, e whakakorekore rānei i a rātou.
- Ngā whanonga tautoko: Hoatu he whakatenatena, kia noho ki reira i ngā wā e hiahiatia ana, me te whakaatu i te mārama ki ana wawata me te whakatakoto whāinga.
- Te whakaute i nga rohe: Whakaaetia, whakahonoretia hoki tōna wāhi whaiaro, ōna whakaaro, me āna whakataunga, me te kore e pēhi, e takahi rānei i ngā rohe.
- Whakawhitiwhiti riterite: Whakatairangahia te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero tuwhera, pono, me te mārama hei hanga whakawhirinaki me te māramatanga i roto i te whanaungatanga
- Te hononga mahi ōrite: Me manaaki ia ia hei hoa ōrite i roto i te whanaungatanga, me te whakapuaki i ngā kawenga me ngā whakataunga, me te whakanui hoki i tana whai wāhi me tōna mana motuhake.
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2. Tukua atu he karere kuputuhi ki a ia
I ētahi wā, ko te huarahi pai hei hoa tāne māu ko te tuku karere whakahoki ki a ia. Tērā pea he wā ka tawhiti kōrua tetahi i tetahi, ā, ka pukumahi ki ō kōrua ake oranga. Tērā pea nā ngā take whaiaro, nā ngā take mahi rānei. Tukua mai he karere e kī ana kei te ngaro koe i a ia, kei te whakaaro rānei koe ki a ia. Tukua he karere ki a ia kia mau tonu tōna hiahiaKa whakakīia tōna ngākau e te aroha me te māharahara ki a koe.
He aha te mahi a te hoa tāne i a koe e tuku karere ana? Ina tuku karere ana kōrua, me whakaatu kei te aro nui koe ki te kōrero. Kaua e meinga ia kia tatari mō āu karere kia kite noa mēnā kei te whaia koe e ia. Koinei tētahi o ngā mea tino whakarihariha o te whanaungatanga, ā, he haunga hoki o te tinihanga. Ehara i te mea me piri tonu kōrua ki tō waea pūkoro e tatari ana mō āna karere. Engari i ngā wā katoa e kōrero ana kōrua, whakautua wawetia, ā, whakautua tonutia ki a ia.
3. Kia ohorere
Kei te whakaaro koe, me pēhea te noho hei hoa tāne ngahau? Mā te ngāwari noa iho ka nui te painga. Mena kua roa kōrua e whakaipoipo ana, he mea maori te noho pai ki roto i te whanaungatanga. Heoi, kaua e tukua te whakamarie kia huri hei te ngākau māhaki i roto i te whanaungatanga — ka pā kino pea ki tō hononga. Ko tētahi o ngā huarahi hei hoa pai ake ko te whakapau kaha kia kaua e tū pakari tō kōrua hononga.
Ka taea e kōrua te whakawhitiwhiti whakaaro mō ngā mahi hei mahi tahi kia nui ake ai te wā kounga. Ko ngā mahi tūpono mā te hoa tāne e tika ana kia mahia:
- Hei miharo i a ia ki ngā putiputi me ngā parāone i ētahi wā
- Kawea ia ki waho ki te hui kawhe nā te mea noa iho
- Tikina he aihikirīmi i waenganui pō
- Whai i tētahi tikanga tiaki whaiaro ngātahi
- Hurihia he pō o te wiki hei tina aroha iti noa iho
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4. Whakarongo pono ina kōrero ia
Me pēhea taku tīmatanga hei hoa tāne pai ake, e pātai ana koe? Whakamutua te kēmu, waiho tō waea pūkoro ki te wāhi wahangu, ā, whakarongo pono ina kōrero ana ia ki a koe. He mea nui kia kia pai tō whakarongo Nā te mea ko te whanaungatanga pai he mea kia kite, kia rangona hoki tetahi i tetahi. Kāore koe e hiahia ki te tuku otinga, ki te tuku whakautu whaitake rānei ina whakapuaki mai tō hoa wahine i ōna raruraru, ina whakapuaki noa rānei i ōna whakaaro ki a koe. Ka taea e ia te whakahaere i ngā raruraru ko ia anake.
Nā, he aha ngā mahi a te hoa tāne? Ko tāu noa he whakarato i tētahi pakihiwi hei okiokinga māna, hei whakapuaki i ōna whakaaro. Kāore ngā tāne e aro nui ki ēnei mea, engari he mea nui pea ki ngā wāhine ina aro nui ā rātou hoa tāne ki a rātou, ā, ka whakarongo noa. Me titiro kanohi ki tō hoa wahine ina hiahia ia ki te kōrero ki a koe mō ngā mea nui, me te tuku tautoko.
5. Kaua e whakarongo noa, engari kia mārama ki a ia
Ehara i te mea nui te whakarongo ki ngā āwangawanga me ngā mamae o tō hoa wahine. Ka taea e koe te noho me te whakarongo ki a ia i a koe e kopikopiko ana i roto i tō hinengaro. Ka taea e te tangata te pena. I te mea kei konei koe, e pātai ana, "Me pēhea taku noho hei hoa tāne pai ake ki taku hoa wahine?", me whakarite koe kia rongo ia, kia mārama hoki. Hei hoa tāne tino pai, me whakapau kaha koe ki te mārama ki tāna e kōrero ana me te take o tana kōrero. Anei ētahi tohutohu ka taea e koe te whakamahi hei hoa tāne mārama, aroha hoki:
- Whakarongo ki a ia me te kore e whakahe i a ia
- Kia nui ake te aroha
- Whakarongo ki te wā puku me ngā wā okioki hoki
- Kia mōhio ki ōna kare ā-roto
- Kaua e akiaki i ō whakaaro, ō whakaaro, me ō whakapono
- Kia kaha te mahi kia tipu ake ai koe. Mā tēnei ka kitea e ia te nui o tō hihiri ki te whakapau kaha.
6. Kia whai kawenga mō āu kupu me āu mahi
He iti noa ngā mea e ātaahua ake ana ki te wahine i te tāne e whakaae ana ki ana mahi. Ko te āhei ki te whakaae ina he koe tetahi o ngā āhuatanga o te hoa tāne pai. Whakaaetia ō hapa kia taea ai e koe te whakatika. Ae, kāore pea tēnei e rite ki te kaupapa nui. ngā mahi aroha mōna Ka tino miharo ia ki tēnā, engari ka taea e mātou te whakapumau atu ki a koe mā te whai kawenga ka koa tō hoa wahine, ā, ka rite koe ki te hoa tāne tino pai rawa atu.
Hei tauira, ki te hiahia koe ki te whakaatu ki a ia he hoa rangatira koe, he hoa aroha hoki, mā te karere kuputuhi, kia mōhio ia mēnā kei te pukumahi koe, kaua e kite i tana karere, kaua hoki e whai wā i mua i te whakautu. Ā, ki te kore e taea e koe te whakamōhio atu ki a ia, me te kī atu, "Aroha mai kāore i taea e au te whakautu wawe atu, he pukumahi ahau", he pai ake i te tumanako noa kia mōhio ia mēnā kāore koe i whakautu mai, tera pea kei te pukumahi koe i tētahi wāhi. Ka maioha ia ki tō pono me tō kaha ki te whakaae ki ō hapa.
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7. Kaua e ngana ki te toa i ngā tautohe katoa
Anei te whakautu māmā rawa atu mō te huarahi hei hoa tāne pai ake: toa i tōna ngākau, kaua e tautohetohe. E kore te hoa tāne tino pai e huri ki te te kōrero i ngā mea mamae i roto i te whanaungatanga hei toa i tētahi tautohe. Kāore tēnei e pā ana ki tētahi hoa rangatira anake, engari nā te mea kei te kōrero tātou mō te noho hei hoa tāne pai, kia arotahi tātou ki tēnā.
He mea nui kia puta ngā tautohetohe i roto i te whanaungatanga, ahakoa he whanaungatanga pai. Heoi, ko te kaupapa o te whakahē, o te tautohetohe rānei, kia kitea he otinga mō ō raruraru, kia kitea rānei he huarahi waenga mō ngā mea kāore e kitea e kōrua. Engari ki te whakapau kaha koe ki te toa i ia tautohetohe, ka uaua ake ngā wā ka puta mai i te pakanga. Anei te huarahi:
- Tērā pea ka arahi atu ki tētahi tauira paitini e kore ai tetahi hoa e rangona, e pehia rānei
- Ka taea e ia te whakaputa i te riri me ngā kare ā-roto mamae
- Ka ārai pea i te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero whai hua
Ka taea e koe te whakaiti i te mamae mā te arotahi ki te whakatau i ngā take, kaua ki te takaro noa i te kēmu whakahīhī. Nō reira, arotahi ki te ngana ki te mārama ki te tirohanga a tetahi ki tetahi, me te kore e hamama tetahi ki tetahi.
8. Kia aroha i ia rā
Ko te kimi i te huarahi hei hoa tāne ngahau, ehara i te mea me whakamātau tonu koe ki te kata i a ia, ki te whakaatu aroha nui rānei. He kihi noa iho i te rae, he awhi mahana rānei ina kite koe i a ia, ā, ka nui hei whakamanawa i a ia, hei whakamanawa hoki i a ia. He mea nui te whai whakaaro ki tēnei ina ngana ana koe ki te kimi i te huarahi hei hoa tāne pai ake ki tō hoa wahine, nā te mea he te kore aroha ka hua ake he maha ngā raruraru i waenga i ngā tāne me ngā wāhine.
Kia aroha tonu, ahakoa i mua i ngā hoa me te whānau. Mā tēnei ka whakaatu koe i tō whakahīhī ki a ia kei roto koe i tō ao. Ko ētahi o ngā āhuatanga o te hoa tāne pai e aroha ana i roto i te whanaungatanga hauora ko:
- Tiaka
- E pupuri ana i tōna ringa
- Te hoatu i tētahi mirimiri pai ki a ia
- Te whakaatu i te hiahia ki ngā mea e pai ana ki a ia
9. Kaua e whakahaere
I roto i tētahi whanaungatanga hauora, ka whakaute te hoa aroha i te mana motuhake o tōna hoa rangatira. Anei ētahi mea hei maumahara māu:
- He mea nui kia whakatenatenahia, kia tautokona hoki tōna āhua ake me āna whiringa, me te kore e whakamahi i te mana whakahaere.
- Ko te mōhio ko ia tōna ake tangata, motuhake i a koe, he mea nui
- Ko tētahi o ngā āhuatanga pai o te hoa tāne ko te whakatau āta kia kaua e whakahau i ana whakatau, e whakahaere rānei i tōna ao i tētahi ara.
Mā te whakawhirinaki ki tana whakatau, me te tuku i a ia kia herekore ki te whakatau i ana ake whiringa, ka whakamanahia ia, ka whakakaha hoki i tō kōrua hononga. Hei whakamutunga, mā te whakaute i tōna mana motuhake, ka hoatu e koe he wāhi ki a ia kia whiriwhiri i tō kōrua whanaungatanga i ia rā, i ia rā. Whakaarohia tō kōrua whanaungatanga hei hononga whakawhirinaki te wāhi e tūtaki ai ngā hoa tokorua i ā rāua haerenga ki te harikoa me te tipu. Ā tōna wā, koinei te huarahi hei whakapai ake i a ia hei tāne.
10. Hoko hei hoa pai mōna
Kāore he mea ataahua atu i te kimi i te whakahoahoa me te aroha i roto i te tangata kotahi. Nā te mea ko ngā whanaungatanga ehara i te mea ko te moepuku pai anake, te aroha, me te hoko koha tetahi ki tetahi. He mea anō hoki ko te kōrero tetahi ki tetahi mō ngā mea katoa i raro i te rā. He mea hoki ko te tautoko i tō hoa i roto i ngā wā uaua. Te tautoko i a ia ina pouri ana ia. Me te whakarongo ki tō hoa ina puta ana ōna pouri.
Ki te hiahia koe kia pai ake te āhua o tō hoa tāne, arotahi ki te whakatipu, ki te whakapakari rānei i tēnei wairua hoahoa. Whakapaua he wā ki tō hoa wahine, kia mōhio ake koe ki a ia, ā, kia noho hei hoa mōna ina hiahia ia ki tētahi hoa. Kia noho hei puna tautoko me hei kaha mōna, kia noho hei tangata hei tahuritanga atu māna ina ngaro ia, kia noho hei tangata hei korerorero tahi māna, ā, e kore rawa koe e whakaaro, "Me pēhea taku noho hei hoa tāne pai ake ki taku hoa wahine?"
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11. Whakatōkia te whanonga atawhai
Ko te atawhai tangata tētahi o ngā āhuatanga tino whakahihiri o te tāne. Whakapono mai, ahakoa kāore, he nui ake te atawhai tangata i roto i ngā tāne i te ātaahua me te wairua whakakatakata. Ahakoa rangahau kua whakaatu tonu koinei te kounga e kukumehia ana e ngā wāhine ina rapu ana rātou i tētahi whanaungatanga. He roa te wā ki te urutau engari he tino pai te utu nā te mea ka meinga te tāne kia ātaahua i te taha o te ira tangata Koinei hoki te whakautu tino pai ki te pātai me pēhea te noho hei hoa pai ake i roto i te whanaungatanga.
Ko te atawhai i roto i te whanaungatanga ko te aro ki te harikoa me te oranga o tō hoa wahine, me te kore e tumanako ki tetahi utu. Ko te mahi i ngā mea atawhai māna nā te mea e hiahia ana koe kia kite i a ia e menemene ana, kia pai rānei tōna wairua, ehara i te mea e hiahia ana koe ki tetahi mea hei whakahoki mai. Ko te noho hei hoa tāne atawhai ko te whakatakoto i ana hiahia me tōna harikoa kia rite ki ōu ake hiahia, kia kaha ake ai, kia whai hua ai hoki tō kōrua whanaungatanga.
12. Whakaatu whakaraerae
He aha ngā āhuatanga o tētahi hoa tāne pai? Ko te awhi i te ngoikore tētahi o ngā āhuatanga tino iti te whakanui, ā, he mea nui hoki. I roto i tētahi whanaungatanga pakeke, ko te awhi i te ngoikore e whakaatu ana i te maia me te pono o te ngākau. Kei roto i tēnei ko te whakapuaki i ō kare ā-roto, ō mataku, me ō āwangawanga, kia puāwai ai te hononga hohonu me te whakawhirinaki i waenganui i a koe me tō hoa wahine. Koinei te mea, i te mutunga, ka āwhina i a koe kia pai ake te taha hinengaro o te hoa tāne.
Mā tēnei hiahia ki te whakaatu i te ngoikore ka waihangahia he taiao e tupu ai te pono me te māramatanga, e whakarei ake ana i te whanaungatanga me te aroha, te ngākau aroha, me te wairua hohonu o te piripono. He rerekē ki te whakaaro rongonui, ko te ngoikore he tohu o te kaha, ehara i te ngoikore.
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13. Kia tūpato ki te āhua o tō tirohanga ki ōna ngoikoretanga
Ina whakapuaki te hoa wahine i ōna ngoikoretanga ki tana hoa tāne, he tohu tēnā i te whakawhirinaki me te whanaungatanga piripono. I taua wā, ka whakaatu te hoa tāne tino pai i te māramatanga, te tautoko, me te urupare atawhai e poipoi ana i te wairua haumaru me te whakaae. Ki te hiahia koe ki te whakatipu, ki te whakapai rānei i ngā āhuatanga tino pai o te hoa tāne, me karo koe i ēnei e whai ake nei ina whakapuaki mai tō hoa wahine ki a koe:
- Whakawa: Kaua e whakahē, e whakaiti rānei i ōna kare ā-roto, i ōna wheako rānei
- Whakakore: Kaua e wareware noa ki ana āwangawanga, kaua hoki e whakaiti i ōna ngoikoretanga
- Whakatika: Āraia te hiahia ki te peke tonu ki te aratau whakaoti rapanga me te kore whakaae a ia
- Te tohatoha me te kore whakaae: Kaua e whakaaturia ana raruraru, ōna ngoikoretanga rānei ki ētahi atu me te kore he whakaaetanga mārama mai i a ia
- Whakaiti: Kaua e whakaititia, e whakaititia rānei te hiranga o ōna kare ā-roto, o ōna wheako rānei
- Whakakorenga: Kaua e whakakorekore i ōna kare ā-roto, i ōna wheako rānei mā te kī atu kia kaua ia e kare ā-roto i tētahi ara motuhake
- Te kore aroha: Āta karohia te kore aro, te kore tautoko rānei i ōna kare ā-roto, i ōna raruraru rānei
14. Kia pai ki te whakararu
Me pēhea te noho hei hoa tāne pai? Akohia te kimi i te huarahi waenga. Ko tētahi o ngā āhuatanga o tētahi whanaungatanga pai ko te whakaae ōrite o ngā hoa e rua. Ko te kaha ki te mahi pera tētahi o ngā mea nui. ngā tohu e tika ana kia noho tahi kōruaHeoi, kia maumahara he rerekētanga nui i waenga i te whakaae me te patunga tapu. Kaua e whakapoauau i ngā mea e rua, kaua hoki e tukua tetahi kia takahi i a koe. Engari ngana ki te whakangawari i tōna oranga mā te whakaae me te tūtaki ki a ia i waenganui i ngā wā katoa e tautohetohe ana, ahakoa te nui, te iti rānei.
Kai Hainamana engari mātakihia he kiriata e pai ana ki a koe. Mā tēnei, ka whakaae kōrua, ā, ka taea e kōrua te mahi i tētahi mea e pai ana ki a kōrua. He tauira noa iho tēnei, he mutunga kore ngā huarahi hei kimi i te huarahi waenga mā kōrua. He mea noa iho te whakaaro. Ehara i te mea uaua te whakaae, e hoa mā! Inaa, he huarahi pai tēnei hei hoa pai ake.
15. Hoatu he wāhi ki a ia
He mea nui te hoatu wāhi ki tō hoa wahine hei hoa pai. Ko te whakaute i tana hiahia mō tōna tū motuhake, mō tōna tipu ake, me te wā ki te whakahou i tōna kaha. Ina wātea ia ki te tūhura i ana hiahia me te noho ko ia anake, ki te noho tahi rānei me ētahi atu, e whakaatu ana tēnei kei te whakawhirinaki koe ki a ia, kei te tautoko hoki i ana whiringa.
- Mā tēnei wāhi ka taea e ia te pupuri i tōna ake tuakiri, ā, ka whakapakari hoki i te whanaungatanga.
- Mā tēnei ka nui ake te maioha o tētahi ki tētahi ina tūtaki kōrua
- Koinei te huarahi tika hei whakaatu e whakanuia ana ia e koe hei tangata takitahi, e whakaute ana hoki i ōna rohe
- I te mutunga ka puta he hononga hauora ake, whai hua ake hoki.
16. Āwhina i a ia ki ngā mahi o te whare
He aha ngā mahi a te hoa tāne? He aha rānei ngā āhuatanga o te hoa tāne pai? Mena kei te noho tahi kōrua, koinei te tohutohu pai rawa atu ka riro i a koe: tohaina te kawenga. Kāore tō hoa wahine i te kawenga mō te tiaki i a koe. Nō reira, kaua e tumanako kia pērā ia. Ehara ia i tō whaea, ā, ehara koe i te tamaiti e hiahia ana kia tiakina. Tū atu ki te tohatoha i te kawenga o te whare ki a ia - koinei tētahi o ngā mea māmā rawa atu. ngā huarahi hei whakaatu i te manaaki mā tēnā e whakakaha tō hononga.
Ko te korenga o tētahi hoa rangatira e pai ana ki te mahi i āna mahi kāinga he raruraru nui tēnei mō te nuinga o ngā wāhine i roto i ā rātou whanaungatanga. Kia pai tō hoa tāne mā te tango i te kawenga o ētahi mahi kāinga. Mena kei te tunu kai ia i te kāinga, māu e horoi ngā rihi. Mena kei te horoi ia i ngā kākahu, māu e tiki ngā kai. Whakaarohia he pūnaha e pai ana māu, ā, e āwhina ana hoki ki te pupuri i te rere pai o ō kōrua oranga tahi - me te kore e tonoa, e whakamaharatia rānei.
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17. Kia aro atu ki ngā mea e hiahia ana ia
Ko te aro ki ngā mea e pai ana ki tō hoa wahine, ki ōna wawata, me āna mahi whakangahau te mea nui hei whakatipu i tētahi hononga hohonu ake. E whakaatu ana tēnei kei te aro koe ki ngā mea e hari ai ia, ā, ka āwhina i a koe kia mārama ake ki a ia. Ahakoa te hiranga o tēnā, ehara i te mea ka whakataka e koe ngā mea e pai ana ki a koe. He ara e rua ngā huarahi o te aroha. Engari ka taea e koe te ngana ki te haere ki waenganui me te whakataurite i ō mea e pai ana ki a koe. Anei ētahi āhuatanga pai o te hoa tāne ka taea e koe te whakamahi hei whakatutuki i taua taurite:
- Kimihia ngā mahi e pai ana ki a kōrua, me te whakakotahi i ō kōrua hiahia
- Kōrerohia mā te mahorahora ō kōrua hiahia, ā, kimihia he huarahi hei whakatau i ngā mea e pai ana ki a kōrua
- Hurihia i waenga i ngā mahi e pai ana ki a ia me ngā mahi e pai ana ki a koe, kia taurite ai ō wheako tahi.
- Kia tuwhera ki te whakamātau tahi i ngā mea hou, ka ārahi pea tēnei ki te tūhura i ngā hiahia ōrite kāore anō kia mōhiotia e kōrua i mua.
- Kia maumahara, ka rerekē ā tātou hiahia i te wā, nō reira, kāore e angitu te mahi i ngā mea kotahi tonu, kia kitea anō tātou tetahi i tetahi, kia kitea anō hoki tātou anō.
18. Whakatairangahia tōna ahuareka
Kāore e taea te whakakore ko te moe pai tētahi o ngā mea nui o te whanaungatanga hauora. Kia arohaina tō hoa wahine mā te ngana tonu ki te whakapai ake i te kounga o tō oranga moe. Kia aro ki ana mea e pai ana ki a ia i te moenga - ko te kimi me pēhea te noho hei tāne pai ake māna he mea ngāwari noa iho. Kaua e hiahia ki a koe anō i te moenga, engari me whakaaro ko koe anake.
ako me pēhea te whakamātau i te wahine i runga i te moengaKōrero ki a ia mō taua mea. Pātai atu ki a ia he aha te mea hei whakahari i a ia. ako kua kitea e 18% anake o ngā wāhine ka eke ki te taumata teitei mā te whakaurunga ki te tara anake. Nō reira, kaua e whakawhāitihia te taatai ki te moepuku anake. Ko te pā atu me te tākaro tetahi ki tetahi. Tūhurahia tōna tinana, kimihia he huarahi hou hei whakahari i a ia. Mena he mea e hiahia ana koe i runga i te moenga, kaua e mangere ki te tono. Engari kia mahara ki te rapu tonu i tana whakaae me te whakaute i taua mea.
19. Akohia tana momo piripono
Kei ia tangata he kāhua āpitihanga e ahu mai ana tēnā i ō rātou wheako tamarikitanga me ā rātou taunekeneke tōmua ki ō rātou kaitiaki matua. Mā te ako i tana momo piripono, ka taea e koe te whakautu i te pātai me pēhea te noho hei tāne pai ake māna. Hei tauira, ki te mea he momo piripono manukanuka tōna, me nui te whakamanawanui i a ia mō tō aroha mai i a koe, ā-waha, ā-kore-waha hoki. Ka pai ake tō mārama ki taua hiahia me te kore e kī he piripono, he matea rānei ia, e pana atu rānei i a ia. Ahakoa kāore e taea e koe te whakatutuki i taua hiahia 100%, ka taea e koe te aroha ki a ia me te kite i te pūtake o tana aroha.
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20. Kia hiahia ki te tipu i roto i te whanaungatanga
Ko tētahi tēnei o ngā ngā huarahi kua whakamātauhia e koe e whakaatu ana i tō aroha ā, kia kite ia i a koe hei hoa tāne pai rawa atu. Mā te whakaaro tipu ka mau tonu te whanaungatanga hou. Ko te whakapono he hihiri koe me tō whanaungatanga, ka taea te whanake me te tupu. Mā tēnei ka whakamana koe ki te aro atu ki ngā wero hei whai wāhitanga mō te tipu, ka akiaki i te manawanui kaua e whakaroahia e ngā arai.
Ka nui ake tō tuwhera ki ngā urupare, ka nui ake tō whakaute ki te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero, ā, ka rapu huarahi koe hei whakapai ake i tō hoa tāne. Ka noho te ako tonu hei pou tokomanawa i a koe e ngana ana ki te whakahōhonu ake i tō hononga me te mārama ake ki tō hoa. Kia tutuki i a koe tēnā, kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakaaroaro me pēhea te noho hei hoa tāne pai ake.
21. Whakaohokia ia ki ngā mahi atawhai
Mā te miharo i tō hoa wahine ki ngā mahi atawhai ka uru atu ki te hinengaro o te maioha me te hononga kare ā-roto. Ka puta ake ngā kare ā-roto pai i ēnei ohorere, ā, ka rongo ia he mea nui ia, he mea arohaina, he mea motuhake hoki. He nui te taumaha o ngā mahi ngāwari, ka puta he pānga roa ki tōna harikoa me te whanaungatanga. Koinei tētahi o ngā āhuatanga whakamiharo o tētahi hoa tāne pai. Anei ētahi tauira o ngā mea ka taea e koe te mahi:
- Takahia he tina i hangaia i te kāinga me āna rihi tino pai hei ohorere i a ia i muri i te rā roa
- Whakatakotoria ngā tuhipoka reka, ā-ringa ki ngā wāhi kāore i te tūmanakohia kia kitea e ia
- Whakaohokia ia ki tētahi pikiniki, ki tētahi haerenga rā rānei ki tētahi wāhi e arohaina ana e ia, hei tāpiri atu i tētahi āhuatanga o te tūāpapa ki tō kōrua whanaungatanga.
- Hoatu ki a ia tētahi koha iti hei whakaatu kei te aro atu koe ki ana hiahia, ki tētahi mea rānei i kīia e ia e hiahia ana koe
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22. Whakanuia āna whakatutukitanga
He huarahi whakamiharo te whakanui i ngā whakatutukitanga a tō hoa wahine ki te whakaatu i tō tautoko me tō manaaki pumau. Ko te mea nui ko te whakamihi me te awhi i ana wikitoria, ahakoa te rahi. Ina tutuki i a ia tētahi mea nui ki a ia - ahakoa he tohu whaiaro, he whakatutukitanga ngaio rānei - whakaaturia te harikoa me te hihiri pono. Ahakoa he mea iti noa iho pērā i te mihi ki tana tapahi makawe hou, me mahi.
23. Whakaharatauhia te whakawhetai me te maioha
Mā te whakapuaki i te whakawhetai me te maioha ki tō hoa wahine ka waihangahia he āhuarangi pai, atawhai hoki i roto i te whanaungatanga. Ko te tikanga he mihi ki ngā mahi nui, iti rānei, i mahia e ia ki roto i te whanaungatanga, ki ō kōrua oranga tahi rānei. Ina whakapuaki koe i te whakawhetai mō:
- He tohu whakaaro nui
- Tōna tautoko i ngā wā uaua
- Tōna aroaro i roto i tōu ao
E whakaatu ana tēnei kei te aro nui koe ki āna mahi, ā, kāore koe e whakahawea ki a ia. Ko ngā mahi ngāwari pēnei i te kī "mihi atu", te mihi ki āna mahi, tae noa ki te tuhi reta maioha e whakaatu ana i tō mihi, ka nui te āwhina ki te poipoi i tētahi whānau hauora, whai hua hoki. hononga kare ā-rotoHe taputapu kaha te whakawhetai e whakahōhonu ake ana i te whanaungatanga piripono, e whakakaha ana hoki i te turanga o tētahi whanaungatanga aroha.
24. Whakamāramahia tō whanaungatanga
He rite te tautuhi i te whanaungatanga ki te hanga mahere mahi tahi — he āwhina i te whakatere i te haerenga e haerehia ana e kōrua. Ahakoa i mua i te pātai atu, "He hoa pai ahau?", pātai atu mēnā kua tika te tautuhi i tō kōrua tūnga whanaungatanga. Ina kore e mārama te whanaungatanga, ka puta he māramatanga, ka arahi ki te koretake, ngā tumanakohanga kāore i tutuki, me ngā kare ā-roto mamae. Kia kaha ki te whakapuaki i ō whakaaro me ō tirohanga.
Koinei tētahi o ngā mea tino nui me mahi e te hoa tāne mā tana hoa wahine. Ki te kite koe i tēnei tangata hei hoa aroha māu, whakapuakina tēnā, me te whakamārama i te tikanga o te noho i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga ki a koe. Mā te tuwhera mō te āhua o tō whanaungatanga ka ārai i te whakapoauau, ā, ka whakatakoto i te tūāpapa mō tētahi hononga kaha ake, pumau ake i runga i te whakaute, te māramatanga, me ngā tumanakohanga mārama.
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25. Kaua rawa e whakararu i a ia
Ka taea e te whakahē te wero hohonu atu i tā tātou e whakaaro nei. Ahakoa he kōrero whakatoi, he katakata mamae, he kupu kino rānei i roto i te pakanga, ka taea e ēnei te whara i te mana o te tangata. Āta karohia ēnei mēnā kei te hiahia koe kia pai ake te taha hinengaro me te taha hinengaro. Ka ārai te hoa pai i te whara i te taha hinengaro, ahakoa i ngā wā o te pouri.
Engari, kia whai kia whakatupu i tētahi whanaungatanga i hangaia i runga i te atawhai me te aroha, inā koa i ngā wā uaua. Kia maumahara, he mana nui tō āu kupu — whakamahia hei whakaara ake i tō hoa, hei whakaatu i te kare ā-roto tautoko i roto i te whanaungatanga, ā, ka poipoi i tētahi hononga hauora, whakaute hoki.
Ko tāku tumanako i muri i te pānui i tēnei tuhinga, kāore koe e māharahara ana ki te pātai, "He aha te mahi a te hoa tāne?" He maha ngā mea iti ka taea e koe te mahi mā te tangata e arohaina ana e koe. Me waiho ia hei kaupapa matua māu, ā, kia noho tonu ki tōna taha. Me noho hei tautoko māna. Kaua rawa e tukua kia whakaaro ia kei te mokemoke ia i tēnei ao. Whakaaetia ia mōna ake, kaua hoki e whakahē i a ia ina hē ia. I a koe e ngana tonu ana ki te rapu huarahi hei hoa pai ake i roto i te whanaungatanga, ka puta noa mai ēnei mea ki a koe.
FAQs
Ka whakaatu te hoa tāne kino i ngā whanaungatanga katoa haki whero... Tērā pea ia e hiahia ana ki a ia anō, e tinihanga ana, e kore rawa e aro ki tana hoa wahine, e piripono ana, e whakahaere ana rānei. Tērā pea ka mutu tana tinihanga. Ko te mea nui rawa atu, kāore ia e whakaatu i te whakaute me te aroha pono.
Ehara te hoa tāne pai i te tangata e hoatu ana ki tana hoa wahine he koha utu nui me ngā haerenga hararei. Ko te hoa tāne pai rawa atu ko te tangata e whakarongo ana, e mārama ana, ā, kia motuhake tana kotiro me te aroha.
A e hiahia ana te wahine kia maimoatia me te aroha me te whakaute. E hiahia ana ia kia hoatu e koe tō wā me tō aro ki a ia, e hiahia ana ia kia whai wāhi koe ki āna whakataunga nui. E hiahia ana ia kia noho haumaru, kia hiahiatia, kia maioha hoki i roto i te whanaungatanga. Ko tētahi o ngā huarahi māmā ki te noho hei hoa tāne pai ake ko te mea kia noho haumaru, kia tau hoki tō hoa mā te noho ki tōna taha, kaua e whakaatu i ngā hae, kaua hoki e whakahaere i ana whanonga, me te noho hei hoa me te tautoko i a ia.
Kāore ngā wāhine e tono nui ana i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga. E hiahia ana rātou ki te whakaute, te aroha, te aro, me te mārama. Āwhina i a ia ki ngā mahi o te whare, ohorere rānei i a ia ki ngā rōhi, ka aroha nui ia ki a koe. Ki te hiahia koe kia noho hei hoa tāne pai rawa atu o te ao, kaua rawa e whakamahi i ōna ngoikoretanga hei whawhai ki a ia.
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