11 Nga mea reka hei mahi i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti

I mua tata nei, i te wā i uru atu ai ki tētahi whanaungatanga tawhiti, ka pāngia koe e te mamae me te ngākau pouri. Koinei pea te take i kino ai te rongonui o ngā whanaungatanga tawhiti. Heoi, i ēnei rā, me te hangarau kei ō tātou ringaringa, kua māmā ake te whakatere i aua whanaungatanga, me ngā karere kuputuhi, ngā waea ataata me ngā taupānga maha hei āwhina i ngā tāne me ngā wāhine kia piripono. He aha e kore ai e whakamahi i ēnei huarahi kia pai ake ai te ngahau o tō whanaungatanga tawhiti. Hei whakatutuki i tēnā, ka kawea atu e mātou ki a koe ngā mea reka tekau mā tahi hei mahi i roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tawhiti kia mau tonu ai te mura o te aroha.

Me ngā whakaaro a te kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro a Ruchi Ruuh (Pouaka Paetahi i roto i te Hinengaro Tohutohu), he tohunga ki te tohutohu mō ngā take e pā ana ki te whakaipoipo, te puremu, te pakanga marena, me te whakarere, ka hoatu e mātou he tirohanga taipitopito ki ngā whanaungatanga LDR e ora tonu ana me ētahi whakaaro aroha e tika ana kia tupu pai ai ngā whanaungatanga tawhiti.

Te Mea Ngaro hei Whakamahi i tētahi Hononga Tawhiti

I pātai te kaituhi wairua o Amerika a Richard Bach, "Ka taea e ngā maero te wehe tūturu? Ki te hiahia koe ki te noho tahi me tētahi e arohaina ana e koe, kāore ianei koe i reira?" Āe, he tika tonu, tera pea, kāore he aha te tawhiti ina tae mai ki te aroha pono me te ngākau aroha i waenganui i ngā wairua e rua kua piripono.

E ai ki tētahi kaiwhakamahi Reddit , kua angitu nei ki te whakatere i tētahi hononga tawhiti , "Mō ngā marama e ono i tuhituhi tahi māua tetahi ki tetahi, ā, i kōrero poto māua i te waea i ētahi wā i te wiki. Hei whakamutunga, kua penapena moni ahau hei hoki ki Ahitereiria. I haere ahau ki a ia me tana tamāhine e rima tau te pakeke. E ono marama māua i noho tahi ai, engari i runga ahau i tētahi visa tūruhi. Nō reira, me hoki ahau ki Amerika. E rima marama anō i noho ai ahau ki reira, i hoko atu, i hoatu rānei aku taputapu katoa, ā, i hoki ki Ahitereiria. E 26 tau ki muri. I moe māua kia taea ai e au te noho. Ahakoa ngā āhuatanga katoa, kei te moe tonu māua."

Titiro mai, kāore ngā whanaungatanga tawhiti e memeha i ngā wā katoa nā te korenga o te whanaungatanga ā-tinana, nā te korenga rānei o ngā wā whakaipoipo. E kōrero mai ana a Ruchi i ētahi mea ngaro hei whakahaere i te whanaungatanga tawhiti:

1. Whakahau tahi te wa kounga

Kei te whakaaro koe me pēhea te noho aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti, me pēhea rānei te whakanui ake i te whanaungatanga tawhiti? E ​​kī ana a Ruchi, "He mea nui kia whakarite i ngā taunekeneke ki tō hoa wahine i te wā e noho ana koe i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti. Ko te tikanga pea tēnei:

• Te whai wāhi atu ki te mariko Ngā mahi LDR
• Te whakapuaki i tō mahi o ia rā ki a rātou
• Te moe tahi, ahakoa mariko (ngā mahi ira tangata/waea ataata, me ētahi atu)

2. Whakatakotoria he rārangi wā

Ko tētahi o ngā whakaaro mō te noho tahi i waenganui i te whānau me te whānau, arā, ko te whakatakoto i tētahi wātaka. Me whai wātaka pūmau koe mō te roa o te wā e tika ana kia wehea ai kōrua. E kī ana a Ruchi, "Me whai mahere pūmau, me whai whāinga, me tētahi tirohanga mō tētahi heke mai tahi hei pupuri i a kōrua kia hihiri, kia whakapau kaha hoki. E kore e taea e kōrua te ngaro ngā kare ā-roto mēnā kāore i a kōrua ēnei whāinga."

Pānui e pā ana: He pai te whanaungatanga tawhiti?

3. Kia pono ki ngā kare ā-roto

E mea ana a Ruchi, "Me mārama te tangata ki ōna hiahia me ōna wawata. Ki te hiahia koe ki te kōrero i ia rā i roto i tō whanaungatanga tawhito , kōrerotia. Ki te hiahia koe ki te whanaungatanga piripono, kōrerotia." I kōrero mai tētahi o ōku hoa, a Alex, he miihini rorohiko nō Connecticut, ki ahau kāore ia i mataku ki te kī atu ki tana hoa tāne i tawhiti me mahi tahi rāua i runga waea kia mau tonu ai te wairua o te whanaungatanga. Nō reira, ahakoa he aha tāu e hiahia ana, tonoa mai.

4. Whakamaherehia ngā mea ohorere

Kua whakamātauhia e tētahi rangahau he pānga pai ngā ohorere ki ō tātou taumata dopamine. Hei whakauru i te kaha hou ki roto i tētahi whanaungatanga tawhiti, whakaritea ngā ohorere i ngā wā katoa. E kī ana a Ruchi, "E whakaatu ana tēnei kei te tino aroha koe ki tō hoa. Hei tāpiri, mā ēnei ohorere ka ārai i te noho pūmau o te kare ā-roto kāore e hiahiatia, te mokemoke rānei."

Pānui e pā ana: Te Whakawhitiwhiti Kōrero i roto i te Hononga Tawhiti

5. Kia mau tonu te kaha

He mea tino nui kia mau tonu te kaha o ngā tāne me ngā wāhine i roto i te whanaungatanga LDR, kia kore ai e hoha te whanaungatanga. Hei whakatutuki i tēnā, e kī ana a Ruchi:

• Tukuna atu he koha ki a rātou
• Tuhia ngā reta
• Karangatia rātou ki tētahi wā tākaro ipurangi

6. Kia mau tonu te mana motuhake

Me whai oranga me te hiahia koe i waho o te whanaungatanga. E kī ana a Ruchi, "Whakaitihia te whakawhirinaki ki tō hoa. Ki te kore koe e uru atu ki tētahi oranga i waho o tō whanaungatanga, kāore koe e ora ana i tētahi oranga whai hua." Anei ētahi tohutohu:

• Kawea mai he kaha hou mai i ngā hoa, i ngā mahi hou rānei
• Āta karohia te amuamu tonu
• Mau tonu rohe hauora

11 Nga mea reka hei mahi i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti

I roto i tētahi rangahau i te tau 2017 mō ngā whanaungatanga tawhiti i waenga i ngā ākonga o te whare wānanga, i kitea ai he pānga kino te kore whakawhitiwhiti kōrero ki ō rātou oranga, ā, i whakararuraru hoki i te taurite i waenga i ā rātou mahi whare wānanga me ā rātou herenga ki te whanaungatanga.

Pānui e pā ana: 25 Ngā Whakaaro mō te Rā Whakaipoipo Tawhiti hei Pupuri i te Hihiko

Mā te whakamahi i ētahi mahi ngāwari o ia rā, ka pai ake te noho tahi o te tangata, ā, ka āwhina anō hoki i a koe ki te whakatere i ētahi atu āhuatanga o tō oranga. Engari he aha ēnei mea hei mahi mā tō hoa tāne, hoa wahine rānei, kia kore ai rātou e māharahara, e ngaro rānei te hiahia? E tekau mā tahi ngā whakaaro aroha e hiahiatia ana e Ruchi mō ngā whanaungatanga tawhiti. Mā ēnei koe e āwhina mēnā kāore koe i te mōhio me pēhea te whakanui ake i te whanaungatanga tawhiti:

1. Ngā takiuru o ia rā

Ko tētahi o ngā mea reka tekau mā tahi hei mahi i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti ko te tirotiro i tō hoa i ia rā, i ia rā. E kī ana a Ruchi, "Kāore e taea e au te whakanui rawa i te hiranga o ngā tirotiro i ia rā i roto i te whanaungatanga e wehea ana kōrua ko tō hoa e te tawhiti." Kōrero ki tō hoa mō tō rā. Kōrero atu ki a rātou mēnā:

• Kua whiwhi hoa koe
• Kei te pāngia koe e te ahotea i te mahi
• He nui rawa tō pukumahi ki te whakarite i tō wāhi hou

Mā te whakapuaki i ō mahi o ia rā ki tō hoa, ka whai wāhi atu koe.

2. Arotahi ki te kite i a koutou anō i runga ipurangi i ia rā, i ia rā

Ko tētahi o ngā mahi maha mā tō hoa tāne, hoa wahine rānei e noho tawhiti ana, ko te whakarite kia kite tahi mā te ipurangi. E kī ana a Ruchi, "Ahakoa te maha o ngā karere kuputuhi, ngā reo rānei ka tukuna e koe ki tō hoa, mā te kite i te āhua o tō hoa ka nui ake te whanaungatanga , ahakoa he waea ataata noa iho, he mea moepuku rānei." Nō reira, kia tino mohio koe:

• Tukuna atu ki a rātou ngā ataata o koe i te mahi
• Tukuna atu he ataata reka ki a rātou i a koe e mahi ana i ngā mahi o te kāinga
• Whakawāteahia he wā mō te waea ataata i ia rā, ahakoa i te ata, i te pō rānei

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3. Whakamaherehia ngā rā mariko

Ko ngā rā whakatā mariko tētahi atu o aua mea reka tekau mā tahi hei mahi i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti. E kī ana a Ruchi, "Me whakarite ngā tāne me ngā wāhine i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti i ngā rā whakatā mariko . Ae, kāore e taea e rātou te whakakapi i ngā rā whakatā tūturu. Engari ka taea e rātou te mea kia rongo tō hoa he mea nui rātou, ā, mā tēnā anō ka whakau i tō kōrua whanaungatanga mō te wā roa."

Anei ētahi whakaaro mō te huarahi hei whakatutuki:

• Inu waina tahi mā te waea ataata.
• Mātakihia he kiriata i runga ipurangi, ka whakapuaki i ō whakaaro tetahi ki tetahi
• Tunua ngātahi te kai kotahi i a koe e waea ana

Ka āwhina hoki ēnei rā ki te whakatau i te raruraru noa o te whakaatu i te aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti.

4. Kawea rātou ki tō tāone

Ko tētahi o ngā huarahi pai ki te hono atu ki tētahi hoa aroha tawhiti ataahua ko te kawe i tō hoa aroha ki te tāone. Nō reira, e kī ana a Ruchi i ēnei huarahi hei hono atu:

• Waea atu ki tētahi waea ataata, tuku atu rānei i ngā whakaahua mai i te toa hoko kai
• Haere ki tētahi pāka ka tīmata i tētahi waea ataata
• Haere ki tētahi huihuinga/kōnohete ka waea atu ki a rātou kia wheakohia hoki e rātou

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5. Tukuna atu he kāri me he reta kua tuhia ā-ringa ki a rātou

Koinei tētahi o ngā mahi tino aroha hei mahi mā tō hoa tāne, hoa wahine rānei i tawhiti. E kī ana a Ruchi, "He nui te whakaaro ki te tuhi reta me ngā karere ki runga kāri, me te tuku atu i ēnei i tēnei ao matihiko, he nui te pāwhiri kotahi hei hono atu ki tētahi." Anei ētahi atu huarahi:

• Ka taea e koe te tuku atu i ngā kete manaaki me ngā mea iti e hiahiatia ana e rātou (pēnei i te kete heu, i te kākahu rānei, i tētahi mea rānei kua roa e kōrerohia ana e rātou)
• Ko tētahi atu huarahi mō te hunga e noho ana i tāwāhi ko te tuku taonga mai i te kāinga, pērā i te taonga whakamaumahara, i ētahi kai maroke rānei.
• I tēnei ao matihiko, ka taea e koe te pupuri i te aroha me te hononga i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti mā te whakawhitiwhiti mihi ahurei, whaiaro hoki. Whakaarohia te tuku mihi Kāri hiko kore utu Punchbowl e hopu ana i te huatau o ngā kāri pepa tuku iho engari e tuku ana i te ngāwari o te tuku mamati. Whakaritea ō karere kia waihanga i ngā wā whai tikanga, kia mōhio ai tō hoa aroha e arohaina ana ahakoa te tawhiti.

6. Waihangahia ngā rārangi waiata tiritahi

Ko tētahi o ngā mea reka tekau mā tahi hei mahi i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti ko te wheako tahi i te puoro. He reo ao whānui te puoro, ā, koinei pea te mea e hiahiatia ana e koe hei pupuri i te hihiri i roto i tō aroha tawhiti ataahua.

E mea ana a Ruchi, "Kāore he mana nui atu i te puoro hei waihanga i te wairua piripono." Haunga te waihanga i te wairua haumaru, ka āwhina anō hoki te puoro i a koe ki te whakapuaki i ō whakaaro hohonu i roto i te huarahi ngawari. He otinga pai tēnei mēnā kei te hiahia koe ki te whakakoi i ngā whanaungatanga tawhiti.

7. Haere tahi ki ngā whare taonga/ngā huihuinga ipurangi

Kāore te whakautu ki te āhua o te noho aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti e takoto tonu ana i roto i ngā mahi whakahirahira. Engari, ko te tūhura i ngā huarahi hou hei hono atu tetahi ki tetahi. Ko tētahi huarahi ko te haere tahi ki ngā whare taonga me ngā huihuinga mariko.

E mea ana a Ruchi, "I a koe e pārekareka ana ki tētahi haerenga whare taonga ipurangi, ki tētahi huihuinga ora rānei ma te ipurangi, ka taea e koe te whakamutu i waenganui i tēnā me te whakapuaki i ō koutou harikoa me ō koutou whakaaro ki a koutou anō." Ko ētahi o ēnei huihuinga ko:

• Nga whakaaturanga waiata ora
• Ngā whakaaturanga makutu mariko
• Ngā huihuinga kanikani ipurangi

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8. Hono atu ki ngā akomanga ipurangi

He huarahi pai tēnei hei hono atu i te whanaungatanga i waenga i ngā hoa faaipoipo. E kī ana a Ruchi, "Mā te rēhita ki tētahi akoranga ipurangi me te haere tahi ki ngā akomanga ka taea e ngā tāne me ngā wāhine LDR te whai whakaaro ki te kaupapa kotahi, ka nui ake te hononga o tētahi ki tētahi, ā, ka hanga hononga piripono tawhiti."

Ka taea hoki e koutou te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero me te whakarite tahi mō ngā whakamātautau. He whānuitanga o ngā akoranga/akomanga hei whiriwhiri māu, pēnei i:

• Ngā akomanga Zumba/yoga
• Tetahi akoranga tiwhikete mātauranga ipurangi
• Ngā akomanga kanikani, waiata, toi rānei

9. Whakanuia ngātahi ngā tohu nui

Kei te whakaaro koe me pēhea te noho aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti, me pēhea rānei te whakaatu i te aroha i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti? E ​​kī ana a Ruchi, "Kaua rawa e whakaititia te mana o ngā tohu nui." Nō reira, whakanuia ngā tohu nui whaiaro me ngā rā motuhake mā te whakamahi i ngā rā mariko me ngā tohu aroha. Ko ēnei tohu nui ka taea:

• rā whānau
• Whanau
• Ngā whakatairanga mahi
• Ko nga huihuinga tohu

He tino whai hua te tohatoha i tētahi wāhanga o tētahi whakatutukitanga mā roto i ngā rā mariko hei whakamana i tō aroha ataahua i tawhiti.

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10. Hangaia he mahi ngāwari

Kua whakamanahia tātou e te hangarau ki ngā huarahi maha hei kōrero ki ā tātou hoa aroha, ā, nā reira, kāore e kore ngā whakaaro LDR mō te aroha me te whanaungatanga piripono. Ahakoa me whai tohu aroha koe hei kukume i te ngākau o tētahi ki tētahi, kāore e taea e ēnei te whakakapi i te wairua haumaru e puta mai ana i ngā tikanga māmā, auau pērā i te tuku karere kuputuhi "mōrena" me "pō mārena" ki a rāua anō.

E kī ana a Ruchi, "He nui ake te whakamarie o tētahi karere kuputuhi māmā i te mutunga o tētahi rā pukumahi, i muri tonu rānei i tō oho ake i tētahi atu mea. Ahakoa kāore e taea e koe te hono atu ki tētahi atu nā te mea kua tino ngenge koe, kei tētahi huihuinga pāpori rānei, ka taea e koe te whakamōhio atu ki te tangata kei te whakaaro koe ki a ia, ā, ka hono atu anō koe i muri mai. Mā tēnei tohu e whakamārama te katoa."

11. Noho i tō oranga i tua atu i te whanaungatanga

Me whai whakaaro pai koe ina taumaha rawa ngā āhuatanga i roto i tētahi hononga tawhiti. Nō reira, kaua e whakaaroaro noa he aha kōrua kāore e taea te kōrero, te kōrerorero rānei i ngā wā katoa, kaua hoki e rapu whakaaro mō te whanaungatanga tawhiti kia piri ai kōrua ki tō hoa, engari me arotahi ki tō ake oranga. E kī ana a Ruchi i ēnei hei pupuri i te taurite hauora kia angitu ai tētahi hononga tawhiti:

• Kia mōhio ki ō rohe, ā, tukua rātou kia whakatakoto i ā rātou ake rohe hei hanga i te whanaungatanga tawhiti
• Whakauru atu ki ngā mahi kāore i te wātea, pērā i te pō whakangahau mō ngā kōtiro me ngā tāne, te haerenga rānei me tō whānau
• Kāore e hiahiatia kia uru kōrua ki roto i ngā mahi katoa. Nō reira, uru atu ki tētahi whare takaro tinana, haere ki tō wharekai tino pai, haere rānei ki te karapu, ā, kia mōhio rātou he rerekē tō kōrua oranga i te whanaungatanga.

Thoughts Final

Kua hoatu e mātou he tirohanga taipitopito ki a koe mō ngā whakaaro aroha e tika ana kia tipu ake ai ngā whanaungatanga tawhiti. Ae, he uaua rawa atu te whakatutuki i tētahi whanaungatanga mō te tokorua tawhiti, nā te mea e hiahia ana rāua ki te whanaungatanga ā-tinana me te whakaipoipo tūturu. Engari ehara i te mea kāore e taea te whakatutuki i tētahi whanaungatanga tawhiti.

Ko tā mātou tumanako mā ēnei mahi reka tekau mā tahi hei mahi i roto i te whanaungatanga tawhiti ka piri ake ai kōrua ko tō hoa, ka hono atu hoki tetahi ki tetahi. Ko tā mātou tumanako kia whiwhi kōrua i te aroha katoa i roto i tō kōrua hononga tawhiti.

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Ehara tō takoha i te koha aroha . Mā tēnei ka taea e Bonobology te kawe tonu mai i ngā mōhiotanga hou me ngā mōhiotanga hou ki a koe i roto i tā mātou whainga ki te āwhina i te tangata o te ao ki te ako me pēhea te mahi i tetahi mea.

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