Kuthamangitsidwa ndi munthu yemwe watengedwa kale kumakhala ndi chisangalalo chokha. Ngakhale izi ndizosangalatsa kwambiri, kuthamangirako kumatha, ndikukusiyani ndi funso loyaka moto - ngati ali ndi chibwenzi, chifukwa chiyani amandifuna?
Mkhalidwewu ukhoza kukhala wosokoneza kwambiri; kumabweretsa kukhumudwa ndi kutaya mtima. Nditawona izi ndi mnzanga Rebecca, nditha kutsimikizira za ululu womwe mtsikana amakumana nawo. 'Mnzake wodzipereka' (momwe ndimamutchulira) adatulutsa ma siginecha osiyanasiyana nthawi zonse.
Kukhala pafupi naye kunangopangitsa kuti zinthu zikhale zovuta. Rebecca ankavutika ndi ntchito ndipo anaika moyo wake pachiswe. Kusagona tulo ndi zododometsa zinali zofala kwambiri pamene malingaliro okhudza ubale wawo anali m'maganizo mwake.
Nthawi zonse ankangokhalira kukhumudwa chifukwa chofuna kulankhula naye komanso kukhala patali. “Kodi n’chifukwa chiyani amafuna kukhala nane pamene ali ndi chibwenzi?
Koma ndikuuzani zomwe ndinamuuza - kambiranani mutuwo pang'onopang'ono. Kusokonekera sikunatifikitse kulikonse, koma ndakubwezerani! Pali mafunso atatu okha omwe tiyenera kuwayankha, ndiye tiyeni tipite!
Kodi Ndi Zizindikiro Ziti Zomwe Mnyamata Ali Ndi Bwenzi Akufuna Kukunyengererani?
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Zinthu zoyamba poyamba. Kodi akuponyadi malingaliro kapena mukuwerenga kwambiri zomwe palibe? Ndiponsotu, n’zosavuta kuphonyetsa ubwenzi wachikondi kukhala wofuna. Chabwino, tiyeni tione zizindikiro, tingatero?
1. Amafunitsitsa kuyankhula nanu
Chinthu chachikulu chomwe muyenera kuyang'anitsitsa ndi kulankhulana. Kodi amakutumizirani mameseji kapena kukuyimbirani foni kangati? Ndipo kumbukirani kuti kulankhulana kumatanthauza kulankhulana komwe amayambitsa. Ngati iye ndiye amene amayambitsa kukambirana pafupipafupi, kungakhale chiyambi cha chibwenzi.
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2. Amakumwetulirani zabwino
Chotsatira, chikhalidwe cha kulankhulana ndi chofunika. Kodi mayamiko ake ndiwamba (“Mukuoneka wakuthwa lero”) kapena wapamtima (“ mphete zimenezo zikuoneka zabwino kwa inu”)? Ngati amamvetsera mwatsatanetsatane, muyenera kudzifunsa kuti, "N'chifukwa chiyani akulankhula ndi ine ngati ali ndi chibwenzi chokhazikika?"
Kuyamika nthawi zonse kumakhala njira yosangalatsa mtima wa mtsikana, ndipo kuyamikira kumakhudza maganizo athu osazindikira. N'zosavuta kusokoneza chikondi chathu tikakhala ndi nkhawa. Kusamala ndi mwamuna amene wadzipereka kale koma akusonyezabe chidwi ndi lingaliro labwino.
3. Amakukondani ngati kuti amakukondani
Chizindikiro chotsatira n'chodziwikiratu - akufuna kucheza nanu m'malo ngati a chibwenzi. Chakudya chamadzulo chachikondi, maphwando a khofi, nthawi yokumana - zonsezi ndi zizindikiro za chidwi, osati ubwenzi wokha . Mwina amakugulirani mphatso ndi maluwa ndipo amakuchitirani ngati chibwenzi.
Ndipo ndikutha kumvetsetsa chisangalalo chokopedwa ndi munthu wodzipereka - ndizosangalatsa!
Nonse muli ndi nthabwala zamkati, ali ndi dzina lakutchulirani ndipo nthawi zonse amakonzekera zomwe mudzachite. Maso ake samakusiyani, ndipo mumabwerezanso kuyang'ana uku. Ena anganene kuti amakuchitirani bwino kuposa chibwenzi chake.
4. Amakuuzani kuti ubwenzi umene ali nawo panopa ukumupangitsa kusasangalala
Koma chomwe chili chowongolera malingaliro ndi momwe amawonetsera ubale wake womwe ulipo kwa inu. Kodi sakusangalala kwambiri ndi mkazi wake? Kodi amakuuzani kuti akufuna kuthetsa chibwenzi?
Pali mwayi waukulu kuti nkhani yake yolira ndi yeniyeni, koma ndikukuuzani kuti mukhale tcheru. Kudzionetsa ngati wozunzidwa ndi njira yodziwika bwino yosewera . Musasangalale kwambiri ngati akunena kuti adzathetsa chibwenzi chanu; mwina sadzatero ndipo mudzavulala. Muli ndi umboni 100% pofunsa chifukwa chake akukufunani ngati ali ndi chibwenzi.
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5. Amakonda kukopana ndi kugwirana manja
Muyenera kukhala tcheru ndi kukopana kulikonse komanso kumakhudzanso kugwirana. Kukopana koopsa ndi chizindikiro cha chidwi, monganso chokhudza mtima. Kodi manja ake amalimbana ndi anu? Kodi amakugwirani m'chiuno pamene mukujambula chithunzi? Kodi mwayandikira mpaka kupsopsona?
Muyenera kudzifunsa chifukwa chake akuchitira izi ngati ali ndi chibwenzi m'moyo wake. Zonsezi ndizizindikiro kuti akufuna kuti mukhale omasuka pafupi naye ndipo akufuna kumanga ubale wapamtima ndi inu.
6. Thupi lake limasintha pozungulira inu
Kulankhula kwa thupi nthawi zonse kwakhala chizindikiro chosonyeza ngati mwamuna akukukonda. 'Mnzako wodzipereka' ankakonda kuchita manyazi kwambiri akakhala pafupi ndi Rebecca - ankasokonezeka mosavuta, lilime lonse linkasokonekera komanso anali wosayenera.
Mutha kumvetsetsa momwe mumamukhudzira kudzera m'mawonekedwe ake. Manyazi, kunyada, kudzikuza, ndi kudzidalira mopambanitsa ndi zitsanzo zina zochepa chabe za kusintha kwa khalidwe.
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7. Iye akufuna kutsimikizira kwanu
Ndipo chomaliza koma chocheperako - kodi malingaliro anu ndi ofunika kwa iye? Ngati abwera kwa inu asanapange zisankho ndikukupemphani malangizo, ndiye kuti akufuna kutsimikizira. Kapena chidwi. Kapena onse.
N'chifukwa Chiyani Mnyamata Amene Ali ndi Bwenzi Amasonyeza Kuti Amakukondani?
Chabwino, tsopano mukudziwa kuti akuyesera kukunyengererani. Ndipo ndikudziwa zomwe mukuganiza - ngati ali ndi chibwenzi, amandifuna chifukwa chiyani? Ngati ubale wake ukukwaniritsa, ayenera kukhala wokhulupirika kwa mkazi wake. Kukukondani ndi kupanga chibwenzi sikoyenera kwenikweni kuchokera kumapeto kwake, sichoncho?
Pali zifukwa ziwiri zomwe zimapangitsa khalidweli kukhala lotere, chifukwa pali mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya amuna omwe ali ndi zibwenzi . Muyenera kusankha mopanda tsankho gulu lake. Ndipotu, ndinu woweruza wabwino kwambiri wa khalidwe lake.
1. Munthu wosewera mpira
Mtundu woyamba ndi Casanovas. Amakonda chidwi chomwe chimabwera chifukwa chokhala ndi azimayi angapo mozungulira. Choncho, mnyamatayo akhoza kukhala wokopa komanso wokongola chifukwa amangofuna kusangalala. Zoonadi, ali ndi winawake kunyumba, koma sizikutanthauza kuti sadzakuthamangitsani.
Koma n’chifukwa chiyani amafuna kukhala nawe pafupi ngati ali ndi chibwenzi kale? Chabwino, monga muwona posachedwa pazifukwa zonse zomwe zafotokozedwa pansipa, mwayi ndi wopanda malire.
Mwina akufuna chibwenzi chenicheni. Munthu wopanda mavuto , mabwenzi abwino, kapena mwina usiku umodzi wokha. Mwina akufuna kukukondani mwachisawawa pamene iye akupitirizabe kudzipereka kwa mkazi wake. Mwina ndi woopa kudzipereka.
Mwina mudzakhulupirira mabodza ake, chifukwa ndi wamatsenga.
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Anyamata ena amakonda kusewera ndi atsikana kuti adzimve bwino. Muyenera kuganiza kuti mwina pali winawake kupatula inu (ndi bwenzi lake) m'moyo wake.
Ndinakumana ndi amuna osiyanasiyanawa zaka zingapo zapitazo pamene ndinafunsidwa ndi mnyamata yemwe anaiwala kuvula mphete yake ya chibwenzi. Izi ndizovuta kwambiri zomwe ndidzazikumbukira kwa moyo wanga wonse.
Kufotokozera koyamba kumayankha funso lakuti “N’chifukwa chiyani akundikopa pamene ali ndi chibwenzi?” Ndi chifukwa 'akusewera munda'.
2. Mnyamata wokonda chilungamo
Mtundu wachiwiri, komabe, ndi wosakhutira kwenikweni ndi ubale wawo. N’kutheka kuti ubwenzi wawo womwe ulipo ukutha, ndipo akuchoka kwa mnzawoyo. Mayi ndi poizoni ndipo akufunadi kuchokamo.
Kukhala pachibwenzi chovutitsa maganizo kungakhale kovuta kwambiri ndipo mwina kampani yanu ingamupatse mpumulo. Pankhaniyi, mwamunayo akhoza kukhala akukukondani kwambiri. Amaona kuti nonse awiri mungathe kuchita bwino ndipo pali zambiri kuposa kungogonana.
'Mnzake wodzipereka' anali mgululi. Ankafuna tsogolo ndi Rebecca koma kumumvera kunabweretsa zolakwa zambiri. Choncho, zizindikiro zosiyanasiyana.
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Ndibwino kukumbukira kuti ngati amakukondani moona mtima, izi ndizovuta kwambiri kwa iyenso. Iye ndiye amene ali mu kudzipereka komwe akuyenera kusiyidwa pomwe akukumverani nthawi imodzi. Kufotokozera uku kumakupangitsani kukhulupirira zabwino za dziko lapansi. Tikukhulupirira kuti ndi zoona kwa inu.
Kodi Muyenera Kuchita Chiyani Ngati Mnyamata Wamnzake Wakufunafunani?
Funso la madola miliyoni! Yakwana nthawi yoti tithane ndi zomwe msungwana amayenera kuchita akakhala ndi chidwi ndi mwamuna wotengedwa.
1. Onetsani momveka bwino zomwe mwachita ndikupita kukamenya nkhondoyo
Mukatsimikiza ngati malingaliro ake pa inu ndi enieni, dziwani bwino zomwe mukunena. Nanga bwanji ngati simunakonzekere kudzipereka ? Kodi mukufuna kukhala naye pachibwenzi kwa nthawi yayitali?
Ngati inde, ndiye kuti kumunyengerera sikudzakhala kovuta kwambiri. Khalani pansi ndi kukambirana naye mwachindunji. Ngati akuganiza kale zothetsa chibwenzi ndi mnzanu, kukambirana ndi inu kusindikiza mgwirizano.
Muyenera kupita motere ngati muwona china chake chachikulu pakati pa inu nonse. Kodi ndinu ogwirizana mokwanira kuti ubale ugwire ntchito? Ngati mukutsimikiza kuti kucheza naye ndizomwe mungafune, lankhulani naye moona mtima.
Payekha, kuchita nawo chibwenzi ndi munthu wamkulu ayi. Zimandiyika pakati pa sewero losafunika, komanso sindikuganiza kuti ndi malo anga oti ndisokoneze. Koma nkhani zamakhalidwe abwino za conundrum iyi ndizomwe muyenera kuziganizira.
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2. Kuthamangira kokasangalala kwakanthawi
Kumbali ina, ngati muli omasuka kukhala 'mkazi winayo', ndiye kuti kugwedezeka kumbali ndiyo njira yoti mutenge. Koma njira iyi imakhala pachiwopsezo chosokonekera ngati m'modzi wa inu akhudzidwa mtima. Kukhala patsamba lomwelo ndikofunikira pazibwenzi wamba.
Si anthu onse omwe amapangidwa kuti azicheza ndi munthu wamba kapena kukhala ndi chibwenzi usiku umodzi ndipo muyenera kudziwa ngati ndinu m'modzi mwa iwo. Chiyeso chofuna kukhala naye pachibwenzi chidzakhala champhamvu kwambiri, koma nthawi zonse ndibwino kusachita chibwenzi ndi munthu amene watenga kale chibwenzi.
Ndipo ndikukulimbikitsani kuti mudziike mu nsapato za bwenzi lake. Hmmm…chakudya choganiza?
3. Pewani sewero ndikutsazikana
Ndipo potsiriza, ngati mumakonda moyo wanu kukhala wovuta komanso wopanda sewero, ndiye kuti mutha kuchepetsa kuyanjana kwanu ndi iye, ndikusiya kuyankhulana.
Ndimatcha iyi Njira ya Rebecca (mukuganiza kuti chifukwa chiyani?). Njira iyi ili ngati kung'amba thandizo la bandi - zowawa poyamba, koma zimakhala zosavuta m'kupita kwanthawi. Mudzamusowa kwambiri poyamba chifukwa mumakonda kucheza naye.
Koma posachedwa zinthu zidzabwerera mwakale ndipo simudzadandaula chifukwa chake akukutumizirani mameseji ngati ali ndi chibwenzi. Khalani omasuka ndi lingaliro lokhala wosakwatiwa , zidzakhala bwino kukhala ndi nthawi yocheza nokha.
Njira ya Rebecca ndiyolunjika ndipo ndi yonenepa kwambiri inde ku funso lakuti "Ali ndi chibwenzi ... kodi ndisiye kulankhula naye?" Ndipo muyenera kuchita izi osati kuti muchepetse moyo wanu, komanso kuti mukhale ndi thanzi labwino! Ziribe kanthu momwe mungayendere, onetsetsani kuti mwakhazikitsa malire anu momveka bwino muubwenzi.
Konzani vuto lanu loti "ngati ali ndi chibwenzi chifukwa chiyani amandifuna?" podzifunsa mafunso onsewa. Ndipo musadandaule za mwamuna yemwe ali pachibwenzi - ingotetezani malo anu! Mutha kubwereranso pa ife kuti mupeze malangizo ena - tidzakhalapo kuti tikuthandizeni.
Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
