Kodi abambo ndi amai angakhale mabwenzi - abwenzi okha, osayembekezera komanso opanda chikondi pa ubale wawo? Ndi funso lachikale lomwe lakhala lofunika kwambiri pakusintha kwanyengo, ngakhale amuna ndi akazi akuyenda mumkhalidwe wovuta wa maubwenzi ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Ngati mukutenga malingaliro anu kuchokera ku chikhalidwe cha pop, mungakhale otsimikiza mopanda kukayikira kuti ubwenzi wa platonic pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi ndi zosatheka.
kuchokera Harry Met Sally ku Ukwati wa Mnzanga Wapamtima, kuchokera kwa Monica ndi Chandler ku Friends kwa Robin ndi Barney mkati Mmene Ndinayambira Ndi Amayi Anu, kuchokera Kuch Kuch Hota Hai ku Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na - nkhani za maubwenzi akuluakulu ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha nthawi zonse zimathera ndi kupotoza kwachikondi. Ngakhale kuti maubwenzi amenewa amabwera ndi malire awoawo ndi zovuta zawo, ubwenzi weniweni pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi si wokayikitsa monga momwe unakhalira.
Psychology ya Ubwenzi wa Amuna ndi Akazi
M'ndandanda wazopezekamo
Mosiyana ndi zomwe tawerenga m'mabuku kapena m'mafilimu, tiyeni tifufuze mozama muzochitika zenizeni komanso zamaganizo pofunsa funso lakuti - Kodi mwamuna ndi mkazi angakhale mabwenzi chabe? Akatswiri ena a zamaganizo amanena kuti nthawi zambiri amuna ndi akazi amatsogoleredwa ndi chikhumbo chachibadwa cha kukwatirana ndi kupanga ana. Zomwe zimawafikitsa ku lingaliro lakuti ngati amuna ndi akazi adapangidwa mwachibadwa kuti abereke, ndiye kuti kukhala mabwenzi sikutheka. Ngakhale kuti zimenezo ndi mfundo zomveka, zonse si zoona.
Kodi amuna ndi akazi angakhale mabwenzi apamtima? Zedi iwo angathe. Pali mitundu yosiyanasiyana ya zokopa monga kugonana, chikondi kapena maganizo zomwe zingayambe pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi. Banja likhoza kukhala ndi zonse kapena chimodzi chokha. Ndipo kotero wina anganene, kuti maubwenzi kaŵirikaŵiri amatsogozedwa ndi kukopeka mtima koposa china chirichonse.
Amuna Ndi Akazi Mavuto A Ubwenzi
Kodi mwamuna ndi mkazi angakhale mabwenzi chabe? Funsoli lachititsa chidwi akatswiri a zamaganizo komanso akatswiri a chikhalidwe cha anthu, zomwe zalimbikitsa kufufuza kwakukulu pankhaniyi. Ngakhale maphunziro osiyanasiyana ndi kafukufuku amawonetsa ziwerengero zosiyanasiyana, chowonadi ndichakuti kukopeka ndi kugonana, ziyembekezo zosiyanasiyana ndi malingaliro a anthu nthawi zambiri zimasokoneza maubwenzi oterowo.
A kafukufuku imasonyeza kuti 22 peresenti ya amuna amene anafunsidwa ndi 11 peresenti ya akazi, anagonanapo ndi bwenzi loti si amuna kapena akazi anzawo. Wina phunziro zomwe zidachitika mchaka cha 2016 zimapeza kuti amuna amatha kukhazikitsa maubwenzi ndi amuna kapena akazi anzawo pokopeka ndi kugonana komanso kuyembekezera 'kupambana pakugonana'. Komabe kufufuza kwina kumatsimikizira zimenezi, kupeza zochitika za kukopeka ndi kugonana ngakhale paubwenzi wa platonic pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi.
Kuti timvetsetse coundrum - amuna ndi akazi angakhale mabwenzi apamtima - tifunika kuunika maubwenziwa kupyolera mu zovuta zambiri zomwe zimatanthauzira njira yawo. Izi ndi zina mwa zifukwa zomwe abambo ndi amai sangakhale mabwenzi.
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Vuto loyamba - Abambo ndi amai sangakhale mabwenzi chifukwa cha kusiyana kwa ziyembekezo
Ubwenzi wa platonic pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi ukhoza kukhalapo, ndipo anthu ambiri amakhazikitsa ubale wolimba wopanda chilakolako chilichonse kapena zolinga zoipa. Komabe, nthawi zambiri, maubwenzi ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha amakumana ndi mavuto chifukwa mabwenzi awiriwa amakhala ndi chiyembekezo chosiyana kuyambira pachiyambi kapena m'modzi wa iwo. kumakulitsa malingaliro achikondi kwa winayo panthawi yaubwenzi.
Maganizo a anthu ndi ovuta ndipo nthawi zambiri amakhala ovuta kuwasiyanitsa, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti zikhale zovuta kwa anthu omwe akukhudzidwa kuti asiyanitse pakati pa maubwenzi, chikondi ndi kugonana.
Vuto lachiwiri - Kukopa kwamphamvu pakugonana
Kuthekera kwa kukopeka kwa kugonana kuloŵerera pa ubwenzi weniweni pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi sikungalephereke konse. Kukumbatirana mwachisawawa kungatengere chilakolako chogonana, kujowina pa tsaya kungayambitse kupsompsona kozama, kokhudza mtima.
Chikoka choterechi chikayamba kugwira ntchito, zimakhala zovuta kuzinyalanyaza. Kuchokera apa, pali njira ziwiri zokha zopitira patsogolo - mwina ubwenziwo wawonongeka kapena umasintha kukhala ubale wachikondi.
Chovuta Chachitatu - Chifukwa chiyani abambo ndi amai sangakhale mabwenzi? Kusafanana
Ubwenzi ndi mgwirizano womwe anthu amagawana nawo. Komabe, kukhazikika kwathu kwa makolo akale kumalepheretsa kufanana koteroko kukhazikitsidwa muubwenzi wapakati pa amuna ndi akazi. Ngakhale patakhala kuti palibe mnzawo aliyense amene amagwirizana ndi malingaliro a utsogoleri, amuna amatha kukhala ndi udindo wolamulira ngati mwamuna wa alpha, pomwe akazi amatenga gawo logonjera kwambiri. Sewero lamphamvuli likhoza kuwononga ubwenzi wautali.
Chovuta 4 - Malingaliro a anthu amasokoneza
Ichi ndi chifukwa chachikulu cha malingaliro a 'Amuna ndi akazi sangakhale mabwenzi'. Ngakhale mwamuna ndi mkazi ali paubwenzi wa platonic, malingaliro a anthu amatha kuwakakamiza kuti awonenso zofanana zawo. Anthu omwe ali paubwenzi wapamtima wa kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha nthawi zambiri amangokhalira kukayikakayika, odziwa zonse amatsinzina komanso amakodola. Izi zikachitika kaŵirikaŵiri, zingadzutse malingaliro achikondi amene potsirizira pake amadodometsa ubwenzi umene mwinamwake unalibe ngakhale poyamba.
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Kodi Mwamuna ndi Mkazi Angakhale Anzanu Basi? Mitundu Ya Mabwenzi
Mosiyana ndi zomwe mafilimu ndi ma sitcoms amapangira maubwenzi a amuna ndi akazi, ma equation awa samachotsedwa mumpangidwe womwewo. Psychology yaubwenzi wa amuna ndi akazi imapita mozama kwambiri ndipo pali mitundu yambiri ya maubwenzi omwe alipo pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi. Zina mwa mitundu yodziwika bwino yaubwenzi pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi ndi izi:
1. Mabwenzi a Plato
Maubwenzi a Plato pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi ndi mawonekedwe osavuta komanso osavuta a equation iyi. Muubwenzi woterewu, mwamuna ndi mkazi amagawana zinthu zomwe amakonda ndi zomwe amakonda ndipo amakhala patsamba limodzi pazomwe amayembekeza wina ndi mnzake. Ubwenzi woterewu suli wosiyana ndi wa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha ndipo nthawi zambiri umakhala wopambana.
2. Mabwenzi a akatswiri
Kodi amuna ndi akazi angakhale mabwenzi apamtima? Inde, nthawi zina amatha kuntchito. Maubwenzi amenewa amachokera ku ubale waukatswiri pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi, wochokera kuntchito. Ma equation awa amatengera zolinga za akatswiri, zovuta ndi zochitika zazikulu, komanso kuchita bwino pakusilira luso la wina ndi mnzake.
3. Mabwenzi abwino
Izi ndi zibwenzi zokhala ndi gawo logonana, kuchotsera zida zaubwenzi. Ubwenzi woterewu umachokera ku kukopeka kobisika kwa anthu awiri. The abwenzi opeza cholowa ma equation amasintha mosokoneza nthawi zambiri, ngati m'modzi wa abwenzi ayamba kukondana, kapena ngati m'modzi wa iwo alowa muubwenzi watsopano, equation imatha kudzaza ndi nsanje.
4. Ubwenzi wokhala ndi mapeto achikondi
Zikatere, mabwenzi onsewo amayamba kukondana komanso kukopeka kwambiri ndi wina ndi mnzake. Onse awiri amasankha kutenga ubale wawo kupita ku gawo lina. Izi nthawi zambiri zimakhala zokhalitsa, maubwenzi odzipereka komanso okhalitsa moyo wonse.
Kodi Mwamuna Ndi Mkazi Angakhale Anzanu Basi?
Monga zakhazikitsidwa, mphamvu za maubwenzi a amuna ndi akazi kapena psychology yaubwenzi wa mwamuna ndi mkazi ndizovuta kale. Kodi chimachitika ndi chiyani mukaponyera okwatirana mu kusakaniza? Kodi mwamuna ndi mkazi angakhale mabwenzi basi? Kapena kodi mabwenzi oterowo ndi chizindikiro cha kusakhulupirika? Ndipo kodi amuna ndi akazi angakhalebe mabwenzi pambuyo poti mmodzi kapena onse apeza wina wofunikira?
Chifukwa cha kuchuluka kwa malingaliro akuti amuna ndi akazi sangakhale mabwenzi, kuyambitsa maubwenzi oterowo mutakhala kale m'chigwirizano, ubale wa mkazi mmodzi akhoza kukweza mbendera zambiri zofiira kwa okondedwa awo ndikukhala nkhani yotsutsana m'banja.
Anthu ambiri amavomereza kuti pamene kuli kwakuti kukhala ndi mabwenzi akale ogonana amuna kapena akazi okhaokha pambuyo pa ukwati nkololedwa, kupanga maubwenzi atsopano kungatanthauze kuyambitsa mavuto m’banja.
Kupatula apo, yankho la 'Kodi mwamuna ndi mkazi okwatira angakhale mabwenzi chabe?' zimatengeranso mtundu wa equation omwe anzanuwa amagawana ndi mnzanu. Ngati bwenzi lanu ndi mkazi wanu angakhoze kudyera pamodzi nkhomaliro, kapena bwenzi lanu ndi mwamuna wanu angawonerere limodzi masewera, muli pa mapazi olimba kuti mumange ubwenzi wokhalitsa, wolemeretsa umene sudzawononga ukwati wanu.
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Kumbali ina, ngati mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu 'asankha vibe' kapena 'ali ndi matumbo akumva' kuti pali chokopa mu equation yanu, mumakhala ndi mkuntho. Izi zanenedwa, mutha kupanga maubwenzi oterowo kuti agwire ntchito popanda kuwononga ubale wanu malinga ngati mumamatira kumalire ena ofunikira mu ubale wanu.
1. Yamikirani malire atsopano
Pamene munali inuyo ndi mnzanu, mwinamwake munachitira zonse pamodzi. Tsopano popeza mmodzi kapena nonse muli ndi mnzanu, zimenezo ziyenera kusintha. Choncho, sitepe yoyamba ya kusunga ubwenzi kupita popanda kulola izo kusokoneza ubwenzi wanu ndi kuvomereza kuti. Kenako pezani zinthu zatsopano zoti muchite limodzi komwe mungacheze popanda kuda nkhawa kuti muwoloke malire abwino.
Mwachitsanzo, m'malo mwa zakumwa Loweruka usiku, mutha kukumana ndi nkhomaliro mkati mwa sabata. Kapena mutha kulankhulana kudzera m'malemba m'malo momangokhalira kuyimba foni nthawi yayitali.
2. Khalani m'gawo losalowerera ndale
Ubwenzi wapakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi wokwatirana umakhala wogwirizana pamene ubwenzi umodzi susokoneza mnzake. Yambani, povomereza kuti mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu amaika patsogolo komanso kuchepetsa nthawi imene mumakhala limodzi ndi mnzanuyo. Musamayembekezere kuti akutsagana nanu kukagula zovala zamkati kapena kupanga mapulani opeza malo ochitira masewera olimbitsa thupi.
Pezani malo ena osalowerera ndale kuti muzicheza. Kupeza khofi, kupita kukaonera masewera, kucheza ndi anzanu ambiri…izi zonse ndi zosankha zoyenera.
3. Samalani ndi mphatso
Tinene kuti ndi tsiku lobadwa abwenzi anu, ndipo mumamupezera zabwino chidutswa cha zodzikongoletsera pamene mwamuna wake akumupezera diresi. Kapena mumamugulira kamera, pamene mkazi wake amamupatsa magalasi adzuwa. Uwu! Ngakhale kuti simukufuna kutero, mukhoza kumangodzikuza n’kumanyoza mwamuna kapena mkazi wa mnzanuyo. Choncho, musamapereke mphatso zanu chifukwa muli nazo nthawi zonse.
4. Pangani ubwenzi ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wanu
Kodi mwamuna ndi mkazi angakhale mabwenzi basi? Inde, bola ngati ndi platonic. Njira yabwino yotsimikizira mwamuna kapena mkazi wa mnzanuyo za zimenezo kuposa kuyesetsa kupanga nawo ubale wodziimira payekha. Atulutseni kuti mukamwe khofi kapena kukagula zinthu, yesani kuwadziwa bwino kuti athe kukhala otsimikiza kuti zomwe mumagawana ndi ubwenzi weniweni pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi.
5. Osasunga chakukhosi
Pakhoza kukhala nthawi ina m'moyo yomwe munali mbali ya moyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku wa wina ndi mzake ndipo tsopano simunamvepo kuchokera kwa bwenzi lanu mu masabata kapena mwina miyezi. Osasunga chakukhosi. Ndi gawo la kukula. Moyo umachitika, umakhala wotanganidwa ndipo umasokonekera. Ngati izo zichitika, lekani chakukhosi ndi mkwiyo wanu. Muyenera kupitiriza popanda malingaliro ovuta. Inu ndi mnzanu nthawi zonse mudzakhala ndi malo apadera mu mtima wa wina ndi mzake.
Kodi Mwamuna ndi Mkazi Angakhale Anzanu Basi?
Chotero, kodi amuna ndi akazi angakhale mabwenzi apamtima? Inde, angathedi. Zedi, pali zidziwitso pa equation iyi, zomwe zimapangitsa kuti ikhale yosangalatsa koma yokakamiza. Malingana ngati onse omwe akukhudzidwa akugawana chikondi cha platonic ndipo ali pa tsamba limodzi pazomwe akufuna ndi zomwe akuyembekezera, abambo ndi amai akhoza kumanga ndi kugawana maubwenzi okhalitsa, ngakhale mmodzi kapena onse awiri akwatirana ndi anthu ena.
Musalole kuti anthu akuuzeni chifukwa chake amuna ndi akazi sangakhale mabwenzi. Ndi njira yamphamvu osati yowongoka. Kumbukirani, ubale wa platonic womwe umadalira malingaliro apansi pamtima si nkhani yowopsa m'dziko lamasiku ano.
Ibibazo
Zingakhale zovuta, koma ndizotheka. Chinthu chokopa ndi chakuti imatha kuchepa. Chifukwa chake ngati sikuli kwachikondi kwenikweni komanso kumangogonana, kungakhale kosavuta kuthana ndi kupitilira. Koma ngati kukopa kwanu kuli kokondana kwambiri, ndiye kukhala mabwenzi kungakhale kovuta kwa inu awiri.
Mnyamata ndi mtsikana abwenzi apamtima ndizofala kuposa momwe mukuganizira. Chifukwa chakuti anthu salankhula za izo kaŵirikaŵiri, sizitanthauza kuti sikungakhaleko.
Mtheradi angathe. Mkazi akhoza kubweretsa mwatsopano amaonera moyo mnyamata monga bwenzi. Palibe chifukwa chomwe sangakhale ndi mgwirizano wamalingaliro ndi waubwenzi moyo wonse.
Zopereka zanu sizikupanga zachifundo Mphatso. Zilola kuti Bonobology ipitilize kukubweretserani zidziwitso zatsopano komanso zaposachedwa pakufuna kwathu kuthandiza aliyense padziko lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.
Hmmm IYE!!! Chilichonse cha izi ndi chowona. Monga inde, bwanji ndi LGBT? alinso mabwenzi ndi aliyense koma kodi ali m'chikondi ndi membala aliyense wa Gulu? AYI WABWINO! Tiyeni tikule sichinthu chomwe chimafunika kuti mtsikana ndi mnyamata azikondana ngati ali mabwenzi.