Kuwona Kwaukatswiri - Kodi Ubwenzi Wamwamuna Ndi Chiyani

Kodi ubwenzi ndi mwamuna ndi chiyani? Mawu oyamba omwe mwina amabwera m'maganizo ndi kugonana. Komabe, amuna ndi unansi wapamtima amatambasula kwambiri kuposa kungokhudza kokha ndi kuyandikana kwenikweni. Ubwenzi ukhoza kuzimitsidwa mumitundu yosiyanasiyana - kukambirana kwautali, chisamaliro ndi manja ang'onoang'ono. Ubwenzi umayenda mozama monga momwe mitsempha yanu imachitira ndipo chimake chake sichimafika pachimake pakugonana.

Nthawi zina, amuna amavutika kufotokoza maganizo awo. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti sakufuna kapena kulakalaka ubwenzi wapamtima. Lingaliro la amuna ndi ubwenzi ndi malingaliro obisika omwe amafunikira kufufuza mozama. Mukamvetsetsa bwino malingaliro awo, mutha kupeza yankho la 'kodi ubwenzi ndi mwamuna ndi chiyani?'. Ndikadati ndiyankhe funsoli, ndinganene kuti zinthu zambiri zosayembekezereka zimakhala chifukwa chaubwenzi ndipo pamakhala chisangalalo pakuzindikira ndikuwunika zomwe zili. 

Kuti timvetse bwino amuna ndi ubale wapamtima, tinalankhula ndi katswiri wa zamaganizo Dr Vishal Gor (Diploma mu Mankhwala a Maganizo) yemwe ndi katswiri pa kuthetsa mavuto okhudzana ndi kubereka komanso mavuto okhudzana ndi kugonana.

Kodi Ubwenzi Umatanthauza Chiyani Kwa Mwamuna - Katswiri Wowonera

Vishal akunena kuti ubale wapamtima uli ndi tanthauzo lalikulu. Limaphatikizapo kusonkhezera m'njira zosiyanasiyana osati kungogonana kokha. Kuwonetsera ubale wapamtima nthawi zambiri kumatayika kwa amuna ndipo motero, kungawoneke ngati kutsekedwa. "Ubwenzi wapamtima kwa mwamuna umatanthauza kudziwa ndi kusamalira munthu wina mozama. Mwamuna amaulakalaka ndipo nthawi zambiri sangathe kuusonyeza. Chiwalo chogonana sichofunikira pa ubale wapamtima," akutero.

Amuna ndi ubwenzi ndi mutu womwe sunafufuzidwe mokwanira. Kukhala wapamtima wapamtima nthawi zambiri kumawonedwa ngati chinthu chosakhala chachimuna. Komabe, kodi zikutanthauza kuti munthu sangathe kufotokoza ubwenzi wamaganizo kwa mwamuna? Izi sizili choncho. Dziwani kuti si amuna onse omwe ali ofanana. Onse amabwera ndi zokometsera zawozawo zamalingaliro ndi zosowa zachitetezo. Choncho, tiyeni tione chimene ubwenzi ungatanthauze kwa mwamuna. 

1. Ubwenzi wapamtima ndi mwamuna ndi wofunika 

Kawirikawiri anthu amaganiza kuti amuna savala zovala zamkati. M'zikhalidwe zambiri, amaphunzitsidwa kutsatira tanthauzo lolimba komanso lokhwima la kugonana ndi maudindo a amuna ndi akazi. Kuleredwa kwawo komanso chikhalidwe chawo nthawi zambiri zimawapangitsa kuti asathe kufotokoza zakukhosi kwawo . Ngati mwamuna wanu akupeza kuti sakudziwa chonena pamavuto, tsopano mukudziwa chifukwa chake. Komabe, amamva zonse mkati mwake, sangathe kufotokoza zakukhosi kwake poyera.

Koma amuna akamakula amafunafuna chithandizo ndi chitonthozo kwa okondedwa awo. Ubwenzi wapamtima kwa mwamuna ndi wofunika kwambiri chifukwa umalola mwamuna kumasuka ndikukhala pachiwopsezo, kutsanulira malingaliro omwe angakhale adawapondereza kwa zaka zambiri. Komabe, popeza anakwiriridwa ndi zinyalala zakale, n’zotheka kuti mungatenge nthawi kuti mufotokoze za ubwenzi wapamtima ndi mwamuna. Kuti izi zitheke, muyenera kukhala pamlingo womwewo ndi mnzanu.

Vishal anati: “Ubwenzi wapamtima ndi wofunika kwambiri kwa amuna chifukwa palibe ubwenzi umene ungakhalepo kwa nthaŵi yaitali popanda iwo,” anatero Vishal, “Amuna amafuna kusamalidwa ndi mwamuna kapena mkazi wawo.” Kusoŵa ubwenzi wapamtima n’kovuta kwambiri kukhudzanso ubwenzi wakuthupi.

2. Amuna amapeza kuyamikiridwa kukhala okondana

Aliyense amakonda kuyamikiridwa bwino. Amuna si osiyana. Amuna ambiri sangakuuzeni kuti angakonde kumva kuyamikiridwa kuchokera kwa inu. Komabe, zoona zake n'zakuti, amakulakalaka mwamseri. Inde, kuyamikiridwa kungapangitse chibwenzi chanu kukhala chosangalatsa . Kutsimikizira kumeneku kumawonjezera kudzidalira kwawo nthawi yomweyo ndikuwathandiza kuyenda tsiku lonse ndi masika.

Julia, yemwe ndi katswiri wa mapulogalamu a pakompyuta, akufotokoza mmene amachitira zinthu mowolowa manja ndi mawu oyamikira kuti apitirizebe kukondana m’banja lake. Mwamuna wake James, mphunzitsi wamasewera, ndi munthu wamanyazi. Kwa zaka zingapo zapitazi, ndakhala ndikumunyengerera kuti azimasuka nane pomuyamikira. kapena "kumeta kwanu kumamveka bwino" Amachita manyazi, amamva bwino ndipo inenso ndimatha kumva.

Amuna ndi ubwenzi ndizofanana pang'ono - zozizira pang'ono ndipo zimafuna kutentha pang'ono. Kuyamikira kumatha kukhala kuwala komwe kumawatenthetsa ndikutulutsa kufunikira kwawo kwaubwenzi. Kotero, kodi ubwenzi ndi munthu ndi chiyani? Yankho lagona mu chiyamikiro chomwe chingawapangitse kumva kukondedwa, kuyamikiridwa ndi kuvomerezedwa.

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3. Kupanga danga ndi chinsinsi kwa amuna

Kodi ubwenzi ndi mwamuna ndi chiyani? Malo. Maubwenzi ambiri amasokonekera chifukwa cha kusagwirizana pakati pa mgwirizano ndi kudziyimira pawokha. Mabanja ambiri m'masiku awo oyambirira amalumikizana pamodzi. Kenako amalakalaka malo, omwe mnzawo sangakhale wokonzeka kupereka chifukwa choopa kusiyidwa. Nthawi zambiri amuna amalakalaka malo. Mayi angaone kuti zimenezi n’zopanda nzeru. Koma kuti amuna ndi chikondi zibwere pamodzi, amayi ayenera kumvetsetsa chikhumbo cha wokondedwa wawo chofuna kudziimira. 

Malo ndi chinthu chachikulu chomwe chimapangitsa kuti mwamuna azikondana akayamba kukondana. Amakhulupirira kuti malo a munthu payekha amasunga ubale . Amuna amakonda kukhala kutali kuti akambirane za chikondi ndikukonzanso, kuti abwererenso ali ndi chikondi. Amuna ambiri amakondanso kupeza njira zothetsera mavuto omwe akubwera okha. Chifukwa chake, malo ndi ufulu muubwenzi zimakhala zofunika kwambiri. Kupatsa mnzanu malo awa kungakhale chizindikiro cha chikondi. Zingathandizenso kumanga ubale wachikondi muukwati. Mwamuna akaona kuti mumamumvetsa bwino, zidzakukokerani nonse awiri kuyandikana. Kupatula apo, chikondi sichimangokhala kukhala limodzi nthawi zonse, eti?

4. Amuna amapeza chiyanjano muzokambirana

Kugawana malingaliro ndi zinsinsi zakuya ndi zinthu zomwe zimalimbikitsa kwambiri ubwenzi, malinga ndi Vishal. Atafunsidwa kuti ubwenzi ndi mwamuna ndi chiyani, iye anati zinthu zaumwini nthawi zambiri zimathandiza kwambiri pakulimbitsa maziko a ubale . "Ndi nkhani yopita pachibwenzi, kuvina limodzi, kuyamba zinthu zatsopano pamodzi, kugawana zinsinsi zakuya ndi malingaliro, kupita paulendo kapena kuyenda maulendo ataliatali, kupatsana mphatso, ndi zina zotero," iye anati, "Zinthu izi zimapangitsa kuti ubale wanu ukhale wolimba. Muyenera kukhala okhoza kulankhulana popanda zopinga."

Kukambitsirana kungasonyeze mmene ubwenzi wapamtima m’banja kapena unansi umakulirakulira. Amuna ena amakhalabe opanda mpanda kapena alibe mawu ofotokozera malingaliro awo m'masentensi. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti alibe zambiri zoti anene. Mnzake amene anganyengerere mawu amenewa kwa mwamunayo amakhala ndi mwayi woti akhale naye pachibwenzi. 

Kukambitsirana kungavumbule zinsinsi zambiri za amuna ndi ubwenzi wapamtima. Mungawayandikire kwambiri mwa kukambirana nawo ndi kuwadziwitsa kuti ndi malo abwino oti azitha kukhala osatetezeka. Palibe chinthu chinanso chaumwini kapena chapamtima kuposa kudziwa momwe wina wake akumvera. Mwamuna angayamikireni chifukwa chomvera maganizo awo. Komabe, onetsetsani kuti simugwiritsa ntchito malowa kusokoneza malingaliro awo. Malo otetezeka ayenera kukhala otetezeka osasintha kukhala chida chopezera mwayi paubwenzi. 

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5. Thupi limakhala ndi gawo lalikulu

Kufunika kwa ubale wapamtima kwa amuna sikungathe kuchepetsedwa. Inde, ubale wapamtima ukhoza kukhala ndi tanthauzo lalikulu kwa mwamuna, monga tanenera kale. Koma mawonekedwe a thupi ndi ofunika mofanana. Amuna amamvetsetsa kuti ubale wapamtima ndi wofunika kwambiri muukwati waubwenzi. Kwa amuna, kugonana kumatha kubweretsa ubale wapamtima. Nthawi zambiri zimakhala zosiyana ndi akazi, komwe ubale wapamtima ungatsogolere kugonana.

Zikafika kwa amuna ndi ubale, mawonekedwe athupi amatenga gawo lofunikira pano. Amuna amatulutsa oxytocin - hormone yachimwemwe - yochuluka panthawi yogonana. Zimawapangitsa kukhala osatetezeka kwambiri komanso okondana. Komabe, kugonana si zokhazo zomwe ziripo pa ubwenzi wapamtima. Chotero, kodi ubwenzi wakuthupi ungatanthauze chiyani kwa mwamuna?

"Kukondana kwenikweni sikungokhudza kugonana kokha. Ngakhale kungokhudzana kokha kungawerengedwe ngati kukondana kwenikweni. Kukumbatirana ndi mnzanu, kugwirana manja, kupsompsonana, kukumbatirana ndi zitsanzo za kukondana kwenikweni popanda kugonana," akutero Vishal, nawonjezera kuti, " Kukondana pang'ono, kukanda mapewa awo ndikugwedeza kumbuyo kwa khosi," akuwonjezera Vishal.

6. Kukhala ndi chinenero chachikondi ndi wapamtima

Nthawi zina chikondi chimatayika polankhulana. Koma ngati atayang'aniridwa bwino, okwatirana nthawi zambiri amagwiritsa ntchito mawu otsimikizira chikondi kuti afotokoze momwe akumvera. Chingakhale chilankhulo chawo chapadera cha chikondi. Zilankhulo zachikondi zimapezeka m'njira zonse ziwiri. Pali mitundu isanu ya zilankhulo zachikondi . Muyenera kungodziwa chomwe chikukugwirani ntchito.

Chinachake chaumwini komanso chapadera monga chilankhulo chachikondi chimamva ngati chapamtima kwa amuna. Ndi chinsinsi chosungidwa bwino kotero kuti lingaliro lake likhoza kukopa amuna. Zimawapangitsa kukhala otsimikiza kuti amagawana nanu zina zakuya komanso zaumwini. Kukhazikitsa chinenero chachikondi ndi sitepe yaubwenzi wapamtima wa mwamuna pamene umakondana umene umatsimikizira kulimba mu ubalewo. 

Yankho loti "ubwenzi ndi chiyani kwa mwamuna?" mwina ndizosavuta kuposa momwe zimaganiziridwa. Yankho lake lagona pakuyankhira mayankho a mafunso awiri ofunikira omwe amapanga maziko a nkhaniyi - kodi ubwenzi wakuthupi umatanthauza chiyani kwa mwamuna komanso momwe ubwenzi wapamtima umatanthauza kwa mwamuna. 

Ibibazo

Njira 12 Zomangirira Ubwenzi Wanzeru Paubwenzi

Zifukwa 5 Zomwe Ubwenzi Wapakati Pa Maanja Umazilala Ndi Momwe Mungapewere

Njira 12 Zopanda Ubwenzi Muukwati Wanu Zimakukhudzani

Chopereka chanu sichikutanthauza chopereka chachifundo . Chidzalola Bonobology kupitiliza kukubweretserani chidziwitso chatsopano komanso chaposachedwa poyesetsa kuthandiza aliyense padziko lonse lapansi kuphunzira momwe angachitire chilichonse.

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