“Ingabe uthandana nomunye wesifazane ngokomzwelo?” – mina nawe sobabili siyazazi izinsolo ezinjalo ngomyeni wakho aziphumi ndawo emshadweni onempilo. Awuvuki ngolunye usuku ekuseni futhi kungazelelwe ubona ukuthi wena nomuntu wakho niphila iminyaka elula ngokuhlukana ngaphansi kophahla olulodwa. Ngibheja ukuthi izimpawu zomyeni wakho zothando komunye wesifazane bezilokhu zikhona, zicashile nje ukuthi zingaphathwa njengobufakazi obuphathekayo.
Izinguquko ezithile ekuziphatheni kwakhe okufana nokuntuleka kwamandla othando kanye nendlela yakhe yokuzivikela yokuqophisana kukuholele kulokhu kuqaphela. Akunangqondo ukucabanga ukuthi “Kungani umyeni wami efuna ukuba nomunye wesifazane?” noma “Angisenandaba naye yini?”. Njengalokhu Ucwaningo ezibuyekezwa njalo, ngesikhathi sokubukeza lesi sihloko ngoMashi 2023, isamba esingu-77% samadoda ashadile abe nokuqoma okungokomzwelo kanti ama-71.8% abe nokuma kobusuku obubodwa. Ngakho, iyiphi inkambo efanele manje? Nakuba kungase kuzwakale kunzima, udinga ukuqala ukufuna futhi uvume izimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakho unesithakazelo komunye umuntu, ngaphambi kokuba kuholele ekungathembeki.
Wazi Kanjani Uma Umyeni Wakho EneCrush Komunye Wesimame?
Okuqukethwe
Uke waqaphela ukuthi umyeni wakho ubabheka kanjani abanye abantu besifazane? Noma unayo umyeni ubekhuluma nomunye wesifazane kakhulu muva nje? Lapho owesilisa wakho enaka kakhulu omunye wesifazane, nakanjani kuzokubangela ukuba ukhathazeke ngokuthi kungenzeka ukuthi uyaduka. Uyazama ukuthulisa lowo muzwa ukuze ugcine ukuthula emshadweni wakho, kodwa uyazi ukuthi izwi elincane ekhanda lakho alilokothi libe nephutha.
Umfundi wethu uSerena, uthisha oneminyaka engu-38 ubudala waseNew Orleans, usithumelela indaba yakhe, “Uliphatha kanjani iqiniso lokuthi umyeni wakho uthanda umngane wakho 'ngaphezu komngane'? Ngiye ngabona lelo phupho elibi ligcwaliseka futhi ngahlala nalo izinyanga. Ekuqaleni, ngangijabule ngokuthi babethandana. Kodwa kamuva, uJean waqala ukungiqhathanisa naye. Wayehlala ebheka izizathu zakhe ukuze amvakashele njalo.
“Izinto azigcinanga lapho. Kancane kancane, uJean waqala ukudlala ngothando naye ngikhona. Wayevele aveze igama lakhe ezingxoxweni zethu. Njengoba usuku nosuku, kwacaca ukuthi umyeni wami ubonakala engasenandaba nami futhi wayecindezela omunye wesifazane, umngane wami omkhulu, ngisho nangaphansi. Iseluleko sami siwukuthi, lapho indoda yakho ibheka omunye wesifazane njalo nje ithola ithuba, qaphela.”
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izinhlobo ezingu-8 Ezivame Kakhulu Zokukopela Ebudlelwaneni
Uma ubona izimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakho unothando ngomunye umuntu, kungaba nzima ukuthola indlela efanele yokubhekana nalesi simo. Kodwa udinga ukukhumbula ukuthi ama-crush ajwayelekile, futhi wonke umuntu unawo. Ungase ucindezele omunye futhi. Asiyivali irada yethu 'yabantu abashisayo' uma sishada. Sisazoqhubeka nokuqaphela nokwazisa abantu abakhangayo. Konke kungokwemvelo, inqobo nje uma kungaphenduki ukungethembeki. Ngakho-ke ukukusindisa kulesi simo sokungaqiniseki, nazi izimpawu eziyi-15 umyeni wakho ethanda omunye wesifazane:
1. Ushintshe ngokuphazima kweso
Sibhekisela ekushisekeleni kwakhe ubudlelwano, nemizamo abeyisebenzisa ukuze enze ukuxhumana kwakho kwezothando kuqine. Uma impendulo yakhe ethi "Belunjani usuku lwakho?" ushintshile kusukela ekuncipheni okunemininingwane kokuqhubeka kosuku lwakhe waya kwethi "inhlawulo" noma "okujwayelekile," cishe uyahoxa kuwe.
Ngemva kweminyaka emihlanu sishadile, umakhelwane wami uNancy waqaphela, “Bengazi ukuthi umyeni wami uyakha ukuxhumana ngokomzwelo nomuntu lapho eqala ukwenza ngendlela ehlukile, okuphambene ngokuphelele nokuziphatha kwakhe okujwayelekile - kusukela ekubukeni komunye nomunye ngezikhathi zothando oluvuthayo kuya ekungabonini nhlobo amehlo! Ubengenza umzamo wokuhlola izikhundla lapho bekungadingeki ukuthi sibhekane khona, konke lokhu egameni lokuzama.
“Ushintsho ekuziphatheni kwakhe lwabonakala nakuzo zonke ezinye izici zokuphila kwethu. Sasinomkhuba wokubhaka amakhekhe ngamaSonto ndawonye. Lanqamuka kungazelelwe. Ngaphambilini ngenxa yokuthi wayekhathele, wabe esehlela ngokuzumayo nabangane bakhe engangingabazi. Njengoba ngangimbuka engasangithakaseli eduze, ngaqala ukuzibuza ukuthi lo mshado usafaneleka yini ukuwusindisa.”
Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izizathu Ezingu-9 Zokukopela Amadoda Ahlala Eshadile
2. Uhlale ethe njo ocingweni lwakhe SONKE ISIKHATHI
Yebo, amafoni ethu abe yingxenye ebalulekile yokuphila kwethu futhi iningi lethu lichitha isikhathi esiningi kuwo ngaphezu komkhawulo wesikhathi sesikrini esinempilo. Kodwa kunomehluko ocacile phakathi kokujwayelana okujwayelekile kumagajethi nokuwasebenzisa ukuze uphishekele izithakazelo zothando ezingaba khona. Nazi izinto ezimbalwa okufanele uziqaphele:
- Ingabe umyeni wakho uchitha isikhathi sakhe esiningi epheqa izinkundla zokuxhumana lapho ekutshela ukuthi udinga ukusebenza kuphrojekthi ebaluleke kakhulu?
- Ingabe uye wayenza ingxenye yomzimba wakhe enwetshiwe, eyithwala yonke indawo, ngisho naseshaweni?
- Ingabe uyenqaba ukukunikeza kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uyidinga ngokuphuthuma kangakanani?
- Uphendula imibhalo yakhe ngokusola, ngokuvamile emamatheka. Kuzwakala kuhlobene?
- Ingabe uvame ukuphuma aye kwelinye igumbi ukuze nje alalele ucingo, aphazamise izingxoxo zenu?
Angeke zonke zibe ukuhlangana nje kwezinto, awucabangi? Lokhu kuthambekela okuyimfihlo kungaba okungaphezu nje kwecala lokho amagajethi aphazamisa ubudlelwano bakho futhi kungase kube izimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakho unesithakazelo komunye umuntu.
3. Unokukhanya okuhlukile ngakuye
Ukuba nothando lothando komunye umuntu ongeyena owakwakho kuyifulegi elikhulu elibomvu emshadweni womuntu oyedwa njengoba kuzamazama isisekelo sokwethembana nokwethembeka? Umyeni wakho encoma omunye wesifazane ngokungaphezi kuyilapho enamahloni ngeke kube lula ukuma. Ngaphezu kwalokho, akunzima ukubona ukuthi uzizwa ekhangwa yini noma cha ngendlela ambuka ngayo lapho ekhuluma futhi ehleka.
Angase abukise ngothando lwakhe ngokudelela ngokumteketisa noma ungase umthole ebiza igama lakhe cishe kuzo zonke ezinye izingxoxo. Ukuba khona kwakhe kungase kumenze ashaywe uvalo njengoba engase aqaphe ngokweqile ukuze afihle imizwa yakhe ngaye. Kungase futhi kufinyelele endaweni oyifunayo amathiphu wokuthi yini okufanele uyenze lapho umyeni wakho evikela omunye wesifazane ezingxabanweni ezincane kakhulu.
“UGloria ufuna izitshalo zengadi yakhe, ngakho ngiye naye enkulisa ngemva komsebenzi,” angase akutshele ngokunganaki. Kodwa uma kuwuhlobo lomfana ongazi into yokuqala mayelana nomehluko phakathi kwama-succulents nezitshalo eziqhakazayo, lokhu kufanele nakanjani kukhulise ama-hackles akho. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi isimo sinjani, uhlale efuna izindlela zokubhalelana naye. Lolu chungechunge lwemicimbi lukhomba ngokusobala zonke izimpawu ukuthi umyeni wakho akasakuthandi.
4. Ubheka izindlela zokungahlali ngaphandle
Uma isikhathi esiningi echitha ngaphandle, kungesinye sezimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakho unothando lomunye wesifazane. Angase angabe esaba nesithakazelo sokwenza izinto nawe futhi noma nini lapho wenza izinhlelo, uvele azigweme ngesizathu esisodwa noma esinye. Manje uchitha ingxenye enkulu yesikhathi sakhe sokuphumula ehlanganyela nabangane bakhe ongazi lutho ngabo.
Noma nini lapho enza imisebenzi efana nokuthola igilosa noma ukugcwalisa igesi emotweni, kumthatha isikhathi eside kunokuvamile ukuthi abuye. Uhlale efuna amathuba okuphumela ngaphandle kwendlu ngoba kukhona omunye umuntu angathanda ukuchitha isikhathi sakhe naye. Kukhona ithuba elihle lakho umyeni uyajola noma i-inchi ibheke kwelinye.
5. Ugwema yonke inhlobo yokusondelana nawe
Ingabe ubudlelwano obuhle, obusondelene phakathi kwakho nomyeni wakho buye baba nethonya elikhulu muva nje? Uma egwema ukukubuka emehlweni, ukukuthinta, ukukuqabula, ukubamba izandla, nanoma yisiphi isenzo sothando ngokuphelele, khona-ke kukhona okuphekayo. Ukukhangwa omunye umuntu kungaludlula uthando analo ngawe, futhi, kuye kwathinta ukusondelana kwenu okungokomzimba enabelana ngakho.
Khumbula leso siqephu esivela Imfundo Ngobulili lapho u-Otis ephendula ngokuthi “Kuhle lokho” kwekaRuby ethi “Ngiyakuthanda, Otis”? Nokho, imizamo enjalo yokungenzi lutho yokugwema ukusondelana ayiwona nje ama-anecdoes avela ezinganekwaneni zothando. Ungazibona emshadweni wakho lapho indoda yakho inika omunye wesifazane uthando olukufanele, olulungile futhi oluyisikwele. Cabangela lokhu njengenye yezimpawu ukuthi umyeni wakho unesithakazelo komunye wesifazane.
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6. Uhlala ecasukile ngakho konke okwenzayo
Uma amehlo akhe ebheke omunye wesifazane, ngisho nezindaba ezingasho lutho nokungavumelani okuncane kuzomema izikhala zesithandwa emshadweni wakho. Angase ahlale enamawala noma ethukuthele ngaso sonke isikhathi, akusole ngezinto ezimlimazayo. Angase afike ezingeni lokukubiza ngokuthi 'uhlanya,' 'unomona,' noma 'uzwela ngokweqile' susa ukusola ebuhlotsheni. Kodwa ngaleso sikhathi, kufanele wazi kangcono ukuthi ungabi yisisulu somdlalo wakhe wokukhohlisa njengoba ungakwazi ukuthola umsuka wentukuthelo yakhe.
UNancy uthi: “Izinkinga zakhe mayelana nanoma yini engangiyenza zazikhula kancane kancane.” Wakhohlwa indlela yokungibonisa ukwazisa kancane, ingasaphathwa eyokuncoma okumnandi kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ngangizama kangakanani ukumenzela okuthile okuhle,” kusho uNancy, enaba ngezinguquko aziphawula lapho ebamba umyeni wakhe encoma omunye wesifazane ngokwedlulele.
7. Uyamcupha njalo
Uma uthola ukuthi uchitha sonke isikhathi sakhe ku-inthanethi ethanda futhi ebeka amazwana ezithombeni zakhe, kuwuphawu olubi. Kunomehluko phakathi kwezinhlobo zokuncoma ozinikeza umuntu. Ukuncoma kungaba okwangempela kanye nokudlala ngothando.
Angase azame ukuziphendulela ngokuthi ubezama ukuba muhle kodwa uyazi uma umuntu ezama ukuqoma. Ikakhulukazi uma kuyindoda yakho. Ngakho-ke, lokhu kuxhumana okweqile kwezokuxhumana kungaba yinkomba yokuthi usethatheka ngomunye wesifazane, noma mhlawumbe, ukukopela ku-inthanethi.
8. Uvele abe muhle kakhulu kuwe ngokuphazima kweso
Uma umuntu enza okuthile okungalungile, angase azame ukukunxephezela ngokweqile ngokuzama ukwenza izinto ‘ezinhle’ ezidlulele. Yingoba ekujuleni kwenhliziyo bayaqaphela ukuthi bakuphatha kabi futhi abakwazi ukuzibamba ukuze bazizwe benecala. Kungenye yezindlela abantu abazama ngazo ukuzizwa bengethuki ngokungathembeki kubalingani babo. Kungenzeka okufanayo uma umyeni wakho enamathele ngokomzwelo komunye wesifazane futhi ezama ukumfuna.
Ngokwesibonelo, uma kade a myeni livila ngaso sonke isikhathi futhi ngokuzumayo iqala ukungena nemisebenzi ngaphandle kokucelwa, kufanele ikhulise izinsolo zakho. Noma uma ukukunaka kakhulu akufani naye, kungaba olunye lwezimpawu umyeni wakho athanda omunye wesifazane.
9. Uyakuqaphela ukubukeka kwakhe
Umdlalo wesitayela womyeni wakho ukhuphukela phezulu uma inhliziyo yakhe isiqalile ukuwela kumuntu omusha. Iziqholo ezintsha, intshebe elungiswe kahle nezinwele, echitha amahora amaningi ejimini - ubengahamba lelo mayela ukuze abukeke ecwebile lapho ezama ukujabulisa othile.
Ushintsho olungazelelwe ku-wardrobe ngeqoqo elisha lemfashini izesekeli fashion amadoda futhi isiphiwo. Kodwa-ke, kufanele uzame ukuthola isizathu sangempela salokhu ngaphambi kokufika kunoma yiluphi uhlobo lwesiphetho. Uma lokhu kuthakasela okusha kokubukeka kahle kakhulu kuhambisana nezinye zezimpawu ezingenhla umyeni wakho akasakuthandi, kungaba umqondo omuhle ukuqala ukuhlela inkambo yakho yesikhathi esizayo.
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10. Uhlala engacacile futhi engacacile kuwe
Akavamile ukukhuluma ngalokho okwenzeka ekuphileni kwakhe manje, ukuthi ukuphi, noma izinto ezincane ezimjabulisayo noma ezimcasulayo. Uma kunjalo, kufanele uqaphe. Ukungabaza ukuxoxa nawe ngezinhlelo zekusasa nokungafuni umbono wakho lapho uthatha izinqumo, ezinkulu nezincane, konke kuyizinkomba zokuthi umbono wakhe ngempilo azifunela yona ushintshile.
Ngenxa yalokho, ibanga phakathi kwakho naye lingakhula ngokuphawulekayo. Nobabili anisaphendukeli komunye nomunye ukuze nithole imibono nezeluleko, futhi ubuhlobo buzizwa bunohlangothi olulodwa. Futhi lokho kungenxa yokuthi kancane kancane uphelelwa isithakazelo kuwe. Lesi ngesinye sezimpawu ezisobala ukuthi umyeni wakho unothando lomunye wesifazane.
11. Uyayeka ukuthatha isinyathelo
Ugcine nini ukukwenzela into yothando? Ingabe uyekile ukwenza imizamo yanoma yiluphi uhlobo ekwenza uhambe kahle? Ingabe umshado wakho ungene esigabeni sokukhohlwa izinsuku ezibalulekile futhi uphuthelwe izikhathi ezikhethekile?
Uma uvuma ngekhanda yebo, kungenzeka ukuthi ubeka la mandla kwenye indawo. Yile mizamo emincane egcina noma yibuphi ubuhlobo buphila. Kodwa uma eqhubeka ebanda noma engenandaba nomshado wenu, akusadingeki menze abone ukuthi ulahlekelwe nguwe. Siyaxolisa ukukuphula, kodwa usevele wakuvalela umnyango.
12. Umzimba wakhe uyehluleka ukufihla imizwa yakhe
Ake sithi, umyeni wakho uyakwazi ukuvala umlomo aqinile mayelana nokuphila okumbaxa-mbili okuyimfihlo akuphilayo. Kodwa siyangabaza ukuthi angakwazi ukuyinqanda imizwelo yothando ukuba ingabonakali phambi kwalowo wesifazane okhethekile. Futhi lelo yithuba lakho lokuthatha izimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakho uyamthanda umngane wakho, uzakwabo, umakhelwane, noma okubi nakakhulu, udadewenu.
Ungakwazi ukuzwa ukushuba kothando (noma okocansi) ngesikhathi le ntokazi engaqondakali ingena. Amehlo akhe azobe ekuyo ubusuku bonke. Ngeke aphuthelwe ithuba lokukhuluma naye. Indoda yakho ingase izame i-tad kakhulu ukumenza ahleke, futhi aqhubeke nokumncoma. Imizwa yakhe yayingachazwa ngeso lakhe.
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13. Uyayeka ukuba nomona ngawe
Uyakhumbula ukuthi kunesikhathi lapho ayebhodla khona uma uthi “sawubona” kumuntu ongamazi kuFacebook noma ugone umngane wesilisa emgwaqweni? Ngalezo zinsuku kungenzeka ukuthi kwakumcasula noma kumcisha, kodwa manje akasenandaba nokuthi uxoxa nobani noma uhamba nobani emicimbini. Kufanele incinde kancane. Ngisho ukuthi, kwenzeke kanjani konke ukukhathazeka kwanyamalala emoyeni? Mhlawumbe bamane bashintshela kwesinye isithakazelo sothando. Cabanga ngakho!
14. Ubamba amanga akhe avamile
Amanga amhlophe lapha nalaphaya akulimazi kodwa uyabona umshado wakho usenkingeni lapho umyeni wakho ekugcina ethunzini lamaqiniso angaphelele. Owesifazane omusha empilweni yakhe kungaba yisizathu sokuthi aqhamuke nezindaba zekhava ezingaqanjwanga kahle mayelana nokuthi ukuphi. Izinsolo zizogcwala engqondweni yanoma ubani. Umazi kahle, futhi ngebhadi uyakwazi ukubona uma eqamba amanga.
15.Intuition yakho ithi indoda yakho igaya umfazi othize
Angase enze noma angenzi izinto ezibhekwa njengezimpawu zokuthi umyeni wakho uthandana nomunye umuntu, kodwa amathumbu akho alokhu ebonisa isimo esibi kakhulu. Uqala ukuzizwa uqhelelene naye futhi intuition yakho ikutshela ukuthi ukhona ukuphuma othandweni emva kokungathembeki.
Izimpawu eziningi ezibalwe ngenhla nazo zingavela ngoba abantu bavame ukushintsha ngokwezinto eziphilayo. Noma yiluphi uhlobo lokucindezeleka lungase luholele kushintsho olunjalo. Ngakho-ke, i-Bonobology iphakamisa ukuthi ulalele umuzwa wakho wamathumbu. Kodwa ungasheshi ufinyelele kunoma yisiphi isiphetho uma ubona izimpawu ezimbalwa kuphela lapho umyeni wakho ethanda omunye wesifazane.
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Yini okufanele uyenze lapho umyeni wakho ethanda omunye wesifazane?
"Kungani umyeni wami efuna ukuba nomunye wesifazane?" uyazibuza, njengoba umyeni wakho ehlola abanye abantu besifazane phambi kwakho futhi ekhombisa cishe zonke izimpawu zokungathembeki okukhulunywe ngenhla. Ukukhala ngomshado wakho obhidlikile kungokwemvelo okwamanje kodwa ungakwazi ukulungisa ibhuloho eliphukile phakathi kwakho naye. Uma ugcina lokhu kungabaza nokwesaba kuwe, uzifaka engozini yokuvula amasango ezikhukhula emshadweni wakho. Uma ukhuluma nesithandwa sakho, kungase kubonakale sengathi umjikijela ngezinsolo. Khona-ke yini okufanele uyenze?
Okokuqala futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, udinga u-100% uqiniseke ukuthi lokho okubona njengezinkomba zokuthi uthuthukisa imizwa yomunye wesifazane akuyona into ebonisa ukungazethembi kwakho nomhawu. Angase abe nencazelo enengqondo ngokuphelele yokuchitha isikhathi nowesifazane ofanayo njalo - ngenkathi uhlezi lapha, elimaza ukuzethemba kwakho ngokubona izimpawu zothando lomzwelo lomyeni wakho yonke indawo. Ngakho-ke uma umlingani wakho ethanda omunye wesifazane, nakhu ongakwenza:
- Ungakhulumi naye ngezinsolo zakho ngaphandle uma unobufakazi obubambekayo
- Uma ungenabo ubufakazi, kodwa amathumbu akho akutshela ukuthi kukhona okuvaliwe, linda izinsuku ezimbalwa ukuze ulandelele indlela aziphatha ngayo eshintshile bese ukhuluma naye ngale ndlela ngokukhululekile.
- Uma usuwazi ngokuqinisekile, vula isikhala sengxoxo enempilo futhi uxhumane naye ngalokho okuzwayo, ngokuqondile nangokulula
- Izikhathi zokuphelelwa ithemba zidinga izinyathelo zokungabi nathemba. Uma enqaba ukuvuma imizwa yakhe, ngeke sikusole ngokubheka izingodo zakhe zezingcingo, izitatimende zasebhange, noma ama-akhawunti enkundla yezokuxhumana ukuze aqoqe amaqiniso athile ukuze alwe nenganekwane yakhe.
- Uyazi ukuthi awukwazi ukuphoqa umuntu ukuthi akuthande, akunjalo? Ngakho-ke, zama ukuqonda (ngomusa) ukuthi kungani ethanda omunye umuntu
- Bona ukuthi ingabe kuwukungaphumeleli kokwahlulela kwesikhashana, isiphazamiso esinempilo nesingenabungozi, noma uphawu oluhlala njalo ebudlelwaneni bakho
- Mbuze ukuthi uzizwa kanjani ngaye, futhi uma ecabanga ngekusasa naye mayelana nezothando noma ukusondelana ngokocansi noma endaweni ethile phakathi
- Uma usebudlelwaneni obuvulekile, khona-ke ukuchoboza kwakhe kothile kuzoletha izingxoxo eziningi, kodwa kuhle, akukho neyodwa yazo okufanele ibe mayelana nokubhidliza umshado wakho. Kulokhu, nawe ubungeke ubone inqwaba yezimpawu ezibalwe ngenhla
- Uma ninomfazi oyedwa nomunye futhi uma ukuchotshozwa kwakhe kumane kuyisigaba sesikhashana esingenangozi, ungase ukwazi ukuthola indlela yokuzwelana naye, nihleke ngakho, noma nimgcone ngemizwa yakhe.
- Ukuchotshozwa kujwayelekile, inqobo nje uma kungathuntubezi lokho eninakho nobabili. Ungakwazi ngisho nokuxoxa naye ngezifiso zakho
- Uma nobabili ninomfazi oyedwa futhi ukuchoboza kwakhe sekuyisiphazamiso esikhulayo, mbuze ukuthi uzimisele yini ukukuyeka futhi alungise ubuhlobo bakhe obuyinhloko nawe.
- Uma impendulo yakhe ingucha, futhi uma umlingani wakho uphelelwa isithakazelo ebudlelwaneni, ungazama ukulungisa isibopho sakho ngomsebenzi omningi nokwelashwa, noma ungamyeka ahambe futhi uqale ukuphulukisa
- Uma kunjalo, siphakamisa ukuthi uyeke igeyimu yokusola ngokushesha futhi uyeke ukudonsa umuntu wesithathu kuzibalo zakho. Yenza lobu budlelwano bube yisizinda sokunaka kwenu nobabili
- Xoxa ngokukhululekile ngezingibe (uma zikhona) okungenzeka ziholele ekutheni athande omunye wesifazane kwaze kwaba sekugcineni.
- Qalani ukuthandana futhi, chithani isikhathi esihle ekhaya, bhalisela imisebenzi yabashadikazi, thatha uhambo, tholani ukuzijabulisa ekamelweni - noma yini esebenzayo ukuze nisondelane nobabili, ngokomzwelo, ngokwengqondo, ngokomzimba.
- Ukwelulekwa ngomshado kungase kusebenze izimanga ekubuyiseleni uthando nokwethembana phakathi kwakho nomyeni wakho. Ngephaneli ye-Bonobology yabelaphi abanelayisensi, usizo olufanele kuphela chofoza kude
Izikhombi Ezibalulekile
- Uma umyeni wakho ngokuzumayo eqala ukuntula amandla akhe emvelo nomdlandla ngobuhlobo benu, angase abe nesithakazelo esisha sothando.
- Ukunamathela kwakhe ocingweni lwakhe kanye namanga aqhubekayo kunganikeza okuningi mayelana nezinhloso zakhe eziyimfihlo
- Uma uqaphela ukuthi ukuziphatha kwakhe nomzimba wakhe kuyashintsha kumuntu wesifazane othile, kungase kube nguye osekhanda lakhe usuku lonke
- Ukungabi nandaba kwakhe nanoma yiluphi uhlobo lokusondelana ngokomzwelo noma ngokomzimba kungolunye uphawu lokuthi ukhulisa ukuthatheka komunye umuntu
- Khumbula ukuthi ukuba nokuchoboza kungokwemvelo ngokuphelele inqobo nje uma kungalimazi ubuhlobo bakho nganoma iyiphi indlela
- Ukuhleka naye mayelana nokuchotshozwa kwakhe ezigabeni zokuqala kungcono kunokubhukha izikhathi zokwelapha phezu kwakho ngemva kokuba sekuyicala eligcwele ukukopela.
Masibhekane nakho, nge-monotony esilethelwa umshado, abantu bayashintsha. Ngezinye izikhathi baphelelwa uthando, noma bacabange kanjalo, futhi ngokuvamile benza iphutha lokuphinga. Khumbula nje, akukona ukuphela komhlaba ukuthi umyeni wakho usethathekile komunye wesifazane. Ungakwazi ukuhleka, ukuthethelela, ukusebenza, noma ukuphulukisa indlela yakho kulokhu.
Le ndatshana ibuyekezwe ngoFebhuwari 2023.
Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa
Kungokwemvelo ukuthi indoda eshadile ithandane nomunye wesifazane/owesilisa. Okubalulekile ukuthi ufuna ukuphishekela ngenkuthalo kangakanani lowo muntu, ukuthi uthembeke kangakanani kumngane wakhe womshado, futhi uma evumelana nemizwa nezenzo zakhe.
Nakanjani! Ukuthi indoda inokuqothuka okuncane akusho ukuthi izomlahla umlingani wayo kanye nempilo ephelele abayikhile ndawonye. Izigxobo ziyadlula, kuhloswe ukuthi zifike zihambe. Ngokufanelekile, akufanele kuthinte imizwa enamandla indoda eshadile ejabulayo enayo enhliziyweni yayo ngomngane wayo womshado.
Ngiyamzonda Umyeni Wami - Izizathu Ezingenzeka Eziyi-10 Futhi Ongakwenza Ngazo
Umnikelo wakho awuhlanganisi inhlangano esiza abantulayo umnikelo. Izovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolwakamuva emzamweni wethu wokusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.
