Izindlela Ezingu-21 Zokwenza Umyeni Wakho Aphinde Athandane Nawe

Ingabe uvame ukuzibuza ukuthi ungenza kanjani umyeni wami aphinde angithande? Cabanga ngalokhu: Ngemva kokukwethembisa ukukuphelezela ephathini yakho yasemsebenzini, lapho ubuzoklonyeliswa khona ngekota edlule, umyeni wakho akafiki. Ugcina uhambele umcimbi uwedwa. Futhi lapho uzwakalisa indlela lokho okukwenze wazizwa udangele ngayo, uyahlehla njengokungathi ubuhlungu nokudumazeka kwakho akunandaba. Uma ukwazi ukuhlobana nalokhu, kufanele ucabangisise ngokuthi ungayenza kanjani indoda yakho iphinde ikuthande.

Uyabona, lapho ibanga liqala ukukhula phakathi kombhangqwana, kunesikhala esanele sokushabalala kothando. Umyeni wakho angase aphenduke umuntu ongamazi, akwenze uzibuze ukuthi umenza kanjani aphinde akuthande. Ubusuku bezinsuku, izipho, nezincomo kungase kunyamalale esibalweni sakho. Ungakhathazeki, njengoba sikuphathele uma umcabango wokuthi ungamthola kanjani umyeni wakho uthando nokunakekelwa ukukhathaza kakhulu. Ngakho-ke, esikhundleni sokuzibuza ukuthi, “Ungathola kanjani umyeni wami ukuthi angithande futhi,” funda ukuze uthole ukuthi yini okufanele uyenze lapho umyeni wakho engakuthandi…

Lushonephi Uthando Emshadweni Wakho?

Ngokuvamile ngokuhamba kwesikhathi kanye nezenzakalo ezithile, ukuqina kanye nentshisekelo enaninayo ngomunye nomunye emshadweni kuncipha kakhulu. Ungase uzizwe sengathi umyeni wakho uselahlekelwe yisithakazelo kuwe ngokocansi . Ngakho-ke, ungase uzithole ufuna impendulo yokuthi “ungayenza kanjani indoda yami ingithande futhi”. Ukuze uthole impendulo, udinga ukubheka ngaphakathi bese uzihlola kancane.

Uma usuwutholile umnyombo walokhu kuhlukana, zama ukuthola ukuthi yini ongayenza ngendlela ehlukile ukuze ungasebenzisi i-google ukuthi ungayenza kanjani indoda yakho ithandane nawe futhi. Kunezizathu eziningi zokuthi kungani ungahle usebenze njengamarobhothi emshadweni wakho futhi uphile njengabantu ohlala nabo. Ezinye zezizathu ezifana nokushabalala kothando emshadweni wakho yilezi:

• Ukubambeka kakhulu: Nobabili ningase nibe matasa ngemisebenzi yenu noma izibopho zomndeni, okungenzeka zinihlukanise
• Izingane zingena esiteji esimaphakathi: Izingane kungenzeka zibe yinto eza kuqala ekuphileni kwakho, zibeke ubuhlobo bakho endaweni yesibili
• Ukujaha imigomo yezezimali: Nobabili ningase nigxilise ukunaka kwenu emigomweni yezezimali ukuze nenze ukuphila komndeni wenu kulondeke
• Ukuntuleka kokuxhumana: Kungenzeka ukuthi igebe lokukhulumisana phakathi kwenu nobabili liye landa ngenxa yomsebenzi noma izibopho zomkhaya. Uma kungekho ukuxhumana okunempilo, ukungezwani, ukulwa, nezingxabano ziqala ukukhula ebudlelwaneni
• Asikho isikhathi sekhwalithi: Anenzeli isikhathi sobabili
• Ukucabanga akukho: Little izimpawu zothando noma izenzo zokwazisa, ezinjengokwenzela umlingani wakho inkomishi yetiye, ukubambana ngezandla, noma ukuthatha umlingani wakho niyodla isidlo sakusihlwa, kungenzeka ukuthi akukho empilweni yenu yomshado. Lokhu kwanele ukukukwenza uzizwe ungathandwa, ungabongwa, futhi ukhathazekile ngokuthi umyeni wakho usephelelwe uthando.
• Okulindelwe okungakafinyelelwa: Okulindelekile empilweni yakho yomshado awufezeki. Konke ukulindela okungalindelekile kuletha imizwa engemihle, okwenza kube nzima ngawe ukuzizwa uthandwa umlingani wakho
• Ukushoda kwezinto ezintsha: Senijwayelene kangangokuthi akukho okusha noma okujabulisayo okusele ongakuhlola. Uma lokhu kwenzeka, imibhangqwana ingaphuma kalula ekunethezekeni iye ekuzitheleleni ebuhlotsheni

Izindlela Ezingu-21 Zokwenza Umyeni Wakho Aphinde Athandane Nawe

Ingabe uzwa sengathi ubuhlobo bakho nomyeni wakho buyadonsa ngaphandle kwenjabulo nokuthakasela? Ingabe nawe uvame ukuzibuza ukuthi ungathola kanjani uthando nokunakekelwa komyeni wakho? Uma kwenzeka uzibuza ukuthi yini okufanele uyenze uma umyeni wakho ephelelwa uthando, ake sikunikeze amathiphu ahloliwe.

Umngane wami uCaroline, umama wezingane ezimbili ohlala ekhaya, wadumala kakhulu lapho ezwa ngokuthandana komyeni wakhe nomuntu asebenza naye. Ethukuthele futhi ekhashelwe, washiya indlu yakhe. Kwakuphakathi nalesi sikhathi sokuhlukana kwecala lapho imizwa yakhe yaqala ukushintsha khona. Efuna ukuqeda umshado wakhe, waqala ukuzibuza ukuthi ikhona yini indlela yokusindisa ubuhlobo. Ngaphezu konyaka, uCaroline nomyeni wakhe bakwazi ngokuyisimangaliso ukubuyelana.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izimpawu Eziyi-18 Eziqinisekile Zokuthi Indoda Engu-Aquarius Ithandana

Uma njengoCaroline, nawe ubulokhu uzibuza ukuthi ungayenza kanjani indoda yakho iphinde ikuthande ngemva kokukopela noma ukuqamba amanga noma ukuhlolela nje imizwa, sikutholile. Kunezindlela eziningi zokubuyisa injabulo futhi wengeze izinongo empilweni yakho yomshado yansuku zonke. Nazi izindlela ezingu-20 zokwenza umyeni wakho akunake futhi umenze aphinde akuthande:

1. Gqoka ukuze ube nomthelela kumyeni wakho

Ngemuva kokushada, kungenzeka ukuthi uguqule ikhabethe lakho ukuze ubeke ukunethezeka kuqala kunesitayela nokukhanga kocansi. Lokhu kuyinto evamile ngokuphelele. Nokho, ngeke kube buhlungu ukubuyisela ubukhazikhazi obuncane ekhabetheni lakho ukuze udale umbono ongapheli engqondweni yomyeni wakho.

Ngakho, nakhu ongakwenza:

• Shintsha ikhabethe lakho ukuze ufake nezingubo ezihehayo
• Qhubeka uhlola izinwele zakho bese ucela iziphakamiso zomyeni wakho
• Faka imali kukhithi yokuzilungisa kahle
• Thenga izesekeli zokuzenzela
• Ngezinye izikhathi, thenga izingubo nezinye izinto ukuze wenze isitatimende sesitayela

Ngale ndlela, uzozizwa ebalulekile futhi azi ukuthi wenza umzamo wokumbheka kahle. Uzokwazisa lokho ngokukuthanda nawe . Angase agqoke ngisho nokugqoka ukuze akubonise ukuthi ukukhathalela kangakanani. Lena enye indlela yokumenza aphinde akuthande.

2. Mmangaze ngezinsuku kanye namaholidi amancane

Uma uchitha isikhathi esiningi ucabanga ukuthi, “Angazi ukuthi ngingamenza kanjani umyeni wami aphinde angithande ”, sinendlela elula yokukulungisa: zama ukubuyisa injabulo ebuhlotsheni bakho. Menze aphinde akuthole ngendlela entsha, kude nezibopho zomndeni. Lena indlela enhle yokwenza umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande. Nazi ezinye izeluleko zokuthi ungamheha kanjani umyeni wakho:

• Khetha amadrayivu amade futhi uthole izindawo ezintsha ezinhle ndawonye
• Shiya izingane uma ukwazi futhi ubuze abangani abaseduze ukuze uthole iziphakamiso zokuya ezindaweni ezintsha
• Zama uhambo lwangempelasonto noma ukuhlala isikhashana endaweni yokungcebeleka yangaphandle
• Mthengele istiriyo semoto esihle noma isipikha se-Bluetooth. Faka ohlwini lwakho lwadlalwayo futhi ujabulele idrayivu ende

Izindlela zokwenza umyeni wakho aphinde athandane nawe akumele zibe yinkimbinkimbi noma zibe zinkulu kunempilo. Izinguquko ezincane kodwa ezicatshangelwayo futhi ezinhle ohlelweni lwakho zingenza iqhinga.

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izindlela Ezingu-20 Zokwenza Indoda Yakho Ikukhumbule Ngesikhathi Sokuhlukana

3. Zama ukuba ne-adventure embhedeni

Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uzibuza ukuthi ungenza kanjani umyeni wakho akufune nsuku zonke noma ukuthi ungenza kanjani umyeni wakho akukhumbule uma ungekho, ukusebenza ngobuhlobo bobulili ebudlelwaneni benu kubalulekile. Nokho, zinike isikhashana ucabange ngempilo yakho yobulili. Buza le mibuzo:

• Ulala kangaki? 
• Ingabe uyenqaba ukweshela kaningi kunokuba ungasamukeli? 
• Ugcine nini ukwenza isenzo embhedeni noma uthando olungokomzimba, njengokuqabula noma ukubambana ngezandla, ngaleyo ndaba?

Izimpendulo zale mibuzo zizokutshela nendlela yokwenza umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande. Uma uzibuza ukuthi ungamkhanga kanjani umyeni wakho futhi umenze akuthande futhi, zama lawa macebiso ukuze ulungise isibopho sakho embhedeni futhi uthuthukise impilo yakho yocansi:

• Ungenqabi ukunxenxa umyeni wakho ngezizathu ezingenangqondo
• Qala uthando olungokomzimba nokusondelana ngangokunokwenzeka
• Zama ukuba ne-adventure embhedeni futhi uvulekele okuhlangenwe nakho okusha. Funda uqhubeke izikhundla ezintsha, ezindaweni zakhe ezingavamile, bese umbuza ukuthi yini evulayo. Uzojabula
• Ungazama namathoyizi ocansi uma evuleleke kulo mbono. 
• Zijabulise ngokuzinakekela futhi uqinisekise ukuthi ubukeka futhi unuka kamnandi embhedeni

4. Bonisa ukubonga ngalokho akwenzela khona

Kungenzeka ukuthi usujwayelene nezinto ezibalulekile ezenziwa umyeni wakho, ikakhulukazi kuwe, futhi ungase uzithathe kalula. Impendulo yokuthi ungayenza kanjani indoda yakho iphinde ikuthande ingase ilale ekuphuleni leli phethini. Yenza umgomo wokumazisa ukuthi uyaziqaphela lezi zinto. Nakhu ongakwenza:

• Mbonge ngenothi elihle elibhalwe ngesandla 
• Pheka ukudla akuthandayo 
• Shiya "Ngicabanga ngawe” ikhadi esikhwameni sakhe 
• Thumela izimbali ehhovisi lakhe nenothi elithi “Ngiyabonga” lapho ekwenzela okuthile okujabulisayo noma okuthandekayo

Izenzo ezincane zokubonga zizothuthukisa ubuhlobo bakho nomyeni wakho. Lena indlela enhle yokwenza umlingani wakho akuthande futhi. Ungambonga nangazo zonke izinto ezincane azenzayo, njengokukutholela ingilazi yamanzi uma ubuya emsebenzini noma ukulungisela ikhabethe lemithi. Lokhu kuhamba ibanga elide ekuboniseni umyeni wakho ukuthi uyakwazisa konke akwenzela kona.

5. Gcina ubuhlobo bokudlala ngothando buphila

Ukuthandana nomlingani wakho kungaba mnandi kakhulu futhi kungaba nempendulo yokuthi ungamenza kanjani umyeni wakho akuthande ngendlela exakile. Uma ubeka uhlangothi lwakho olujabulisayo noludlalayo, uzophinde akuthandane futhi futhi ubudlelwane phakathi kwenu nobabili buzophela. Lena futhi indlela yokwenza umyeni wakho akukhumbule, uma esemsebenzini noma engekho kwelinye idolobha. Ngakho-ke, zama lawa macebiso:

• Thumela umyeni wakho umbhalo odlalayo ukuze enze umcabango wakhe uphazamiseke
• Mthinte ngokujwayelekile noma umthinte ngendlela eyela ngasocansini neyothando
• Njengoba ungena eshaweni, mthumelele isithombe sakho esishisayo ukuze uvuse inhlansi yothando

6. Phishekela umsebenzi wokuzilibazisa awuthakaselayo

Ngakho, ulokhu ucabanga, “Ngifisa sengathi ngangazi ukuthi ngingamenza kanjani umyeni wami ukuthi angithande futhi.” Ukuze uthole lokho, kufanele ukhumbule iqiniso lokuthi ubuntu bomyeni wakho kanye nemvelo yothando enabelana ngalo nakanjani kuzoshintsha futhi kuguquke. Ukuze ulondoloze uthando emshadweni, kubalulekile ukuthi nikhule futhi niguquke ndawonye.

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Ukuze uguquke, cabanga ngokuthatha noma yimuphi umsebenzi noma umsebenzi othandwa umyeni wakho ngempela ongenziwa nawe. Uma ejoyine ikilabhu, qhubeka futhi uyijoyine. Lokhu kungasiza ngempela ukuvala igebe uma ubulokhu uzibuza ukuthi ungamkhanga kanjani umyeni wakho lapho uthando ebudlelwaneni lufiphala. Nansi indlela:

• Ungamnika inkampani futhi nichithe isikhathi esiningi ndawonye
• Kuyovusa inhlansi efile emshadweni wakho
• Kuzokwenza mjabulise, njengoba ukuba nesithakazelo esikhulu ezintweni azithandayo kuyindlela yokubonisa ukuthi umthanda kangakanani
• Lapho ebona ukuthi utshale imali kangakanani kuye nakulobu budlelwano, naye angase afune ukuba nesithakazelo ezintweni ozithandayo nezinto ozilibazisa ngazo.
• Uzogcina ufunda ikhono elisha, ngaleyo ndlela uthuthuke njengomuntu

7. Mkhuthaze ukuba azikhiphe nabangane bakhe

Indida ethi “ukwenza umyeni wami aphinde athandane” ingabonakala ingaxazululeki kodwa ungamangala ukuthola ukuthi isinyathelo sokuqala lapho singaba lula njengokumcela ukuthi azikhiphe nabangane bakhe. Izame futhi ubone umehluko. Ngokwenza lokhu, ubonisa umyeni wakho ukuthi uyayihlonipha indawo yakhe nokuba yimfihlo. Inkosikazi ekwaziyo ukwenza lokho ngokuqinisekile izothandwa futhi ihlonishwe umyeni wayo.

Ngakho-ke, vumela umyeni wakho enze iphathi endlini yakho futhi ameme abangani bakhe abaseduze. Uzokwazisa. Sithembe, ngezinye izikhathi, impendulo yokuthi ungenza kanjani umyeni wakho akufune ngaso sonke isikhathi kungaba: mnike isikhathi nendawo. Kuzwakala kuyindida, siyazi, kodwa kusebenza njengentelezi. Nakhu ukuthi kusiza kanjani:

• Kubonisa ukuthi uzazisa kangakanani izinto ezibalulekile kuye. Lokhu nakanjani kuyoncibilikisa inhliziyo yakhe futhi kumenze afune ukuya phezulu nangaphezulu ukuze akwenze uzizwe ukhethekile
• Kubonisa ukuthi awuyena owesifazane olawulayo
• Kubonisa ukuthi ukhuthaza indawo yomuntu siqu ebudlelwaneni

8. Zamani ukuxazulula izinkinga ngokukhulumisana

Ingabe ungumuntu ohlale etholakala ethi, “Ngifuna nje umyeni wami angithande”? Futhi ulokhu usho lokhu kuwena, kubangani bakho, futhi heck, naku-Google. Ulokhu uzibuza ukuthi ungayenza kanjani indoda yakho ikuthande ngokuhlanya. Kodwa ingabe ukusho lokhu kuye ngamazwi amaningi kangaka? Uma kungenjalo, khona-ke wazi kahle ukuthi yini okufanele uyenze lapho umyeni wakho engasakuthandi: khuluma, vula isifuba, xhumana, futhi wabelane.

Ukuthola ukuthi ungaluthola kanjani uthando nokunakekelwa komyeni wakho kungadinga ukuzijwayeza ukuba sengozini esikhundleni sokuvala umlomo nokushisa ngentukuthelo. Sebenza ekuxazululeni noma yiziphi izinkinga zempilo yomshado ngokuxhumana. Sebenza ekubeni yindawo ephephile yomunye nomunye. Ukuxhumana kuyisihluthulelo sobudlelwano obunempilo futhi ungabandakanya nomyeni wakho ekwenzeni ezinye izivivinyo zokuxhumana eningazijabulela ndawonye. Zama lawa macebiso okuthi ungenza kanjani umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande:

• Noma nini lapho inkinga ethile ikhula, yenzani umgomo ukuthi nihlale phansi niyixazulule ndawonye ngokushesha 
• Lapho uxazulula ukungqubuzana, gxila endabeni onayo kunokuba uzame ukukhombisa ukuthi uneqiniso 
• Ungabheki izindlela zokubeka icala koshade naye
• Gcina ukuhloniphana ngenkathi niphikisana, ngaphandle kolimi olululazayo noma ukubiza amagama

Ngale ndlela, ukuvuthwa kwakho ekusingatheni izinkinga zomshado kuzomhlaba umxhwele ngempela. Futhi uzophinde athandane nawe.

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9. Xhumana naye noma nini lapho kunenkinga

Ngokushada, nobabili nithembisene ukuchitha impilo yenu yonke ndawonye futhi nabelane okuhle, okubi, nokubi. Ukukhulumisana nokwabelana ngayo yonke into encane , okuhlanganisa nezinkinga zenu, nomyeni wakho kugcina uthando luphila. Mhlawumbe lesi yisisombululo esihle kakhulu endabeni ethi 'ungamenza kanjani aphinde athandane nawe'.

Uma niyeka ukuncika komunye nomunye ngezikhathi zesidingo, ibanga phakathi kwenu lingase libe banzi ukuze kungene umuntu wesithathu. Ngaphambi kokuthi wazi, ungase uzithole usufuna izindlela zokunqoba umyeni wakho ekuqomeni.

10. Gwema ukugxeka

Ingabe uvame ukuzithola ukhononda ngokuthi, “Umyeni wami akangihloniphi noma akangithandi” noma “Ngifuna nje umyeni wami angithande”? Zama ukuqonda ukuthi yini engalungile ngaye futhi ugweme ukugxeka amaphutha. Uma ubulokhu uzibuza ukuthi ungamenza kanjani umyeni wakho akufune nsuku zonke, zama ukuzijwayeza ukuthethelela ebudlelwaneni bakho . Lolu shintsho oluncane lwesimo sengqondo lungenza umshado wakho uphumelele futhi.

11. Funda ukubhekana nokungezwani

Ulokhu uzibuza ukuthi wenzeni uma umyeni wakho esekuthand noma umenza kanjani aphinde akuthande? Yeka ukungezwani kwakho, funda ukungazithukutheli izinto ezincane, futhi uvumelane nokungavumelani lapho kunesidingo. Uma wena nomyeni wakho seniye nahlukana kwaze kwaba sezingeni lapho nizizwa ningathandwa, nakanjani kuyoba nezinkinga ezihlala isikhathi eside, ezingaxazululeki emshadweni wenu.

Ukuze udlule kuzo kanye nokukhathazeka okukhathazayo njengokuthi, “Ingabe umyeni wami uyangithanda?”, udinga ukuzibophezela ekusebenziseni amasu anempilo okuxazulula izingxabano bese uqala kabusha nge-clean slate. Nakhu ongakwenza:

• Yamukela ukuthi wena nomyeni wakho ningabantu ababili abanobuntu obuhluke ngokuphelele abahlangene ukuze bachithe impilo yenu ndawonye
• Kunokuba nilwe ngenxa yokungezwani okunjalo, nobabili kudingeka nikunakekele. Zilungise ngokuvumelana nezifiso nezidingo zakhe ezifanele
• Ukulwa kulungile, kodwa okubalulekile ukuthi uphinde uxhume kanjani ngemva kokulwa

Ngakho-ke, impendulo ku-conundrum yakho yokuthi "indlela yokuthola umyeni wami ukuthi angithande futhi" ilele ekubambisaneni nokwamukela ukuthi ungubani.

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12. Yamukela amaphutha owenzayo futhi uxolise

Uma umyeni wakho ephelelwa isithakazelo kuwe ngokothando, sekuyisikhathi sokuthi uhlole futhi ubone ukuthi kukhona yini okungalungile okwenzile. Umngane, uLisa, wayevame ukuzibuza ukuthi “Ingabe umyeni wami uyangithanda?” ngemva kwayo yonke impi encane naye. Akazange akwenze ukuthi “ngiyaxolisa” noma amphendule ngemva kwalokho. Ngokweseluleko sami, waqala ukuxolisa noma nini lapho enza iphutha. Futhi lokho kwasebenza njengomlingo. Ubuhlobo bakhe nomyeni wakhe babuyela esimeni.

Amaphutha ebudlelwaneni awanakugwenywa. Kodwa akufanele uvumele la maphutha onakale ebudlelwaneni bakho. Kunalokho, bheka lapho uphambuka khona bese uzama ukulungisa izinto. Khumbula, asikho isikhathi esifanele sokuxolisa. Kusebenza noma nini lapho usukulungele. Uma ebona ukuthi wenza umzamo oqotho wokuba uhlobo olungcono kuwe, uthando luzobuyela emshadweni wakho. Nazi ezinye izeluleko zokufeza lowo mgomo:

• Mthumele isixoliso esisuka enhliziyweni ngemva kokulwa 
• Ziphathele iphutha lakho 
• Makeup kumyeni wakho ngokuhlela idethi ethokomele, yesidlo sakusihlwa sothando
• Zicele ukuthi nixoxe ngokuthula niphuze ingilazi yewayini ekhaya

Lezi ezinye zezindlela ezilula zokwenza umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande.

13. Mphe izinto azithandayo

Ngokuvamile kucatshangwa ukuthi ebudlelwaneni, indoda kufanele ithengele umfazi izipho . Kodwa lokhu akufanele kube umthetho obalulekile ebudlelwaneni benu. Nawe ungathatha isinyathelo sokupha umyeni wakho izipho futhi umazise ukuthi uyamthanda. Lokhu kuzosiza kakhulu ekuboniseni ukuthi uyamkhathalela futhi ekuxazululeni inkinga yakho yokuthi "ungayenza kanjani indoda yami ingithande futhi".

Nakhu okufanele ukukhumbule:

• Isipho singase sibe sincane noma sibe sikhulu, sibe sikhulu noma singabizi
• Ungathatha amakha akhe ayintandokazi, izincwadi, iwayini, noma i-DSLR 
• Faka umcabango futhi umtholele into akade eyifuna
• Esikhundleni sokulinda umcimbi okhethekile, mnike okuthile ngosuku oluvamile

Ukufunda Okuhlobene: Izipho Zothando Ezingama-30 Zakhe [Izipho Ezithinta Imizwa Zabesilisa] 2022

14. Funda ukulinganisa impilo yakho yobungcweti neyomuntu siqu

Ungakuthola kanjani ukunakwa komyeni wami futhi, uyazibuza? Qala ngokulungisa ibhalansi yempilo yomsebenzi. Ungagxili kakhulu ekuzibophezeleni kwakho emsebenzini uze ukhohlwe ukunikeza umyeni wakho isikhathi. Ngenkathi uzibuza ukuthi ungayenza kanjani indoda yakho ikufune ngaso sonke isikhathi, cabanga ngokunikela isikhathi esengeziwe kuye.

Zibuze:

• Ugcine nini ukuvala ikhompuyutha ephathekayo ukuze ulalele uma kunokuthile okubalulekile afuna ukukuxoxa? Ugcine nini ukulalela nhlobo lapho ekhona? 
• Ugcine nini ukubambana naye ngesidlo sasemini ngosuku lomsebenzi? 
• Ugcine nini ukubeka phambili ukulala naye embhedeni ngaphezu kokuqeda leyo phrezentheshini? 
• Ugcine nini ukumbuza ukuthi udla ukudla okunempilo yini uma esemsebenzini?

Zonke izinto ezincane ezifana nalezi zingase zibonakale zingabalulekile, kodwa empeleni, zingaba yimpendulo yalokho okufanele ukwenze uma umyeni wakho ephelelwa uthando nawe. Ngakho-ke, kwenze umkhuba ukumbeka kuqala, hhayi njalo, kodwa ngokwanele ukuze umazise ukuthi uyaziswa futhi uyafunwa.

15. Beka imingcele enempilo

Ukwazi ukuthi kufanele uyeke nini bese uthatha isinyathelo sokubuyela emuva kubalulekile empilweni yomshado. Ngakho-ke, isinyathelo esihlakaniphile ngasohlangothini lwakho kungaba ukubeka imingcele enempilo ezothuthukisa ubudlelwano obuqinile. Isibonelo, uma umyeni wakho ekuthethisa, esikhundleni sokumemeza, ungaphuma uyokhuluma naye ngemva kokuba esethule.

Ukubeka imingcele yemizwa kubaluleke kakhulu, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uzama ukwenza umyeni wakho athandane nawe emshadweni ohleliwe noma ukuvuselela uthando olulahlekile ebuhlotsheni. Lapho izimpi ziphuma esandleni, uthando luyaphela. Lokhu kwenzeka lapho umbhangqwana wehluleka ukubeka imingcele enempilo ehlonipha ukuzethemba kwabo bobabili abalingani. Ukudweba umugqa esihlabathini okungekho umlingani ovunyelwe ukuwela indlela yokubuyela othandweni nomyeni wakho futhi umenze athandane nawe.

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16. Ngaso sonke isikhathi bonisa uthando lwakho ngamazwi anomusa noma ngokushukuma komzimba

Amazwi nezenzo ezincane zothando zinamandla okushanela noma ubani ezinyaweni zakhe. Ngokubonisa uthando lwakho ngamazwi noma ngezandla, ungaqinisekisa ukuthi umyeni wakho akalambi ngokomzwelo. Lena futhi indlela yokubuyela othandweni nomyeni wakho.

Ngakho-ke, lapho uTrisha engisebenza naye, umyeni wakhe engamnaki , wangithinta ngombuzo ojwayelekile othi “indlela yokwenza umyeni wami angithande futhi”, engangithi mhlawumbe udinga ukuvelela kancane ngezenzo zakhe zothando. Nakhu ukuthi izenzo zothando kumyeni wakho zingase zibukeke kanjani:

• Kwazise ukuthi uphelele ngendlela ayiyo, esebenzisa amazwi athambileyo othando
• Gwema ukulimaza umyeni wakho ngamazwi ahlabayo
• Sebenzisa ukuthula ukuze uzuze esikhundleni samagama athukuthele, lapho uthukuthele 
• Mncome ngokushesha noma usho okuthile okufana nokuthi, “Bengizokwenzenjani ngaphandle kwakho?”

Lokhu kuba kubaluleke kakhulu uma uzama ukubuyisa umyeni wakho komunye wesifazane ngoba kukhona omunye umuntu akuqhathanisa naye. Uma usunqume ukusindisa umshado wakho ngemva kokungathembeki komyeni wakho, udinga ukumenza abone ukuthi kungani usengumfazi wamaphupho akhe futhi uzohlala enjalo. Ayikho indlela engcono yokwenza lokho kunokumenza azizwe emuhle, ethandwa, futhi efunwa. Ngokwenza kanjalo, uzoqala isifiso sakhe sobuqhawe , futhi uma usuphumelele kulokho, ngeke kudingeke ukhathazeke ngokuthi ungamenza kanjani umyeni wakho akuthande futhi ngemva kokukopela.

17. Gwema ukufuna izinto ngenkani

Kufanele uqinisekise ukuthi lokho okulindele ebudlelwaneni akukona okungokoqobo, uma kwenzeka uzibuza ukuthi ungayenza kanjani indoda yakho ikuthande futhi lapho isifuna isehlukaniso. Mhlawumbe, ukubona ukuthi umyeni wakho akakuthandi ngendlela efanayo kukwenza ube umuntu oswele. Lapho unamathela kuye ngokuphelelwa yithemba, kulapho ungase umqhubekisele kude.

Khumbula, uma uqhubeka uswele futhi ufuna ngenkani, ngeke ukwazi ukuphinde uzuze uthando lwakhe. Ngakho-ke, yenza lokhu esikhundleni:

• Sebenzela ukuzithuthukisa futhi ube ngumuntu athandana naye, kwasekuqaleni. Nqoba noma yikuphi ukungavikeleki ukuthi ungaba nobunzima
• Gwema ukufuna izinto ngenkani, ukubelesela, nokungazethembi
• Sebenza ekwenzeni isimo sakho sengqondo sivumelane

Lokhu kungase kudinge ukuthi wenze umsebenzi othile wangaphakathi kanye nokuzihlola ukuze uqonde ukuthi kungani uvame ukungazethembi futhi uswele uma izidingo zakho ezingokomzwelo zingahlangatshezwana nazo. Mhlawumbe, kunesitayela sokunamathiselwe esingavikelekile esidlalwa lapha. Kodwa lokho akuyona into ongakwazi ukuzitholela yona uwedwa. Ngakho-ke, thatha lokho kugxuma kokholo bese uphendukela kuchwepheshe wezempilo yengqondo ukuze uthole usizo, uma ufuna. Ukuthola umnyombo wezinkinga zakho kungaba esinye sezixazululo zenkinga “yokwenza umyeni wami angithande kakhulu”.

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18. Yazise imibono yakhe

Uma uchitha isikhathi esiningi uzibuza, “Ngingenzani ukuze umyeni wami angithande futhi angihloniphe futhi?”, yazi ukuthi uthando luzala uthando kanti inhlonipho izala inhlonipho. Ukumenza azizwe sengathi ubalulekile kungaba yisiqalo esihle. Uma kungenzeka, thatha isinyathelo sokumbuza ngombono wakhe ngezinto ozenzayo. Ngokwenza lokhu, ungambonisa ukuthi uyamhlonipha futhi uyazazisa iziphakamiso zakhe. Lena yindlela yokwenza umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande.

Wonke umuntu uthanda ukwaziswa, kanjalo nomyeni wakho. Nazi ezinye izibonelo zendlela yokwenza umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande ngokwazisa imibono yakhe:

• Thatha umbono wakhe ngenkathi wenza izinqumo ezibalulekile zomsebenzi
• Nquma umthunzi we-upholstery yakho ndawonye 
• Nquma imoto ofuna ukuyithenga kuphela ngemva kokucabangela iziphakamiso zakhe

19. Mncome phambi kwabanye

Udadewethu omdala, uJamie, wayevame ukuchitha amahora amaningi efunda ngokuthi “ungenza kanjani umyeni wami angithande kakhulu”. Kodwa lokho kwamane kwamshiya edidekile, futhi ekugcineni wangithululela isifuba, esho indlela umyeni wakhe ayekade engamnaki ngayo kamuva. Ngamcela ukuthi aqhubeke ngimncome ngezici ezithile azithandayo ngaye, kwasebenza.

Lapho wenza umzamo wokumncoma phambi kwabanye, ubonisa ukuthi uyamthanda futhi umamukela ngokuphelele. Uzosiza ekukhuliseni ukuzethemba kwakhe kuye nasebudlelwaneni. Lena indlela yokwenza umyeni wakho akuthande futhi lapho efuna isehlukaniso noma indawo ethile. Nanka amaphuzu okufanele uwakhumbule:

• Ukumgxeka phambi kwabanye kuwu-no-cha oqinile
• Noma yiziphi izinkinga noma izikhalazo ongase ube nazo zingabhekwa ngasese. 
• Your ukuziphatha kwenkundla yezokuxhumana kungathinta ubudlelwano bakho. Ngakho-ke, gwema ukuklabalasa noma ukuthumela imilayezo eyimfihlo eqondiswe kumyeni wakho. Ukuhambisa izingubo zakho ezingcolile esidlangalaleni kuyingozi ebudlelwaneni futhi kufanele kugwenywe
• Khuluma ngazo zonke izinto ezinhle azimelayo phambi kwabangane nomndeni futhi uzokuthanda ngokuhlanya ngalokho

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20. Yazi ulimi lwakhe lothando

Uzibuza ukuthi ungenza kanjani ukuthi umyeni wakho akufune ngaso sonke isikhathi? Ngezinye izikhathi, singase siqhubeke nokutshala imali eziphweni noma sigcine sichitha isikhathi nabalingani bethu, bese siqaphela ukuthi kungenzeka ukuthi abahlobene nezenzo zethu zothando. Nakhu lapho kufanele wazi khona ukubaluleka kokufunda ulimi lothando lomyeni wakho , uqiniseke ukuthi awumqondi kahle. Nansi indlela yokwenza umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande. Nazi izilimi zothando ezi-5 ezivelele kakhulu, nokuthi lokho umuntu akubheka njengokuhlukile kakhulu kuye ngomuntu:

• Amagama okuvuma
• Isikhathi sekhwalithi
• Thinta
• Izenzo zenkonzo
• izipho

21. Thatha usizo lomeluleki

Umbono ongathathi hlangothi nongakhethi ngochwepheshe oqeqeshiwe ungakunikeza umbono obalulekile novula amehlo ngezimbangela eziyisisekelo zazo zonke izinkinga zobudlelwano bakho . Ngakho-ke, ungaya kumeluleki ochwepheshe wedwa noma ukhuthaze umyeni wakho ukuthi akuphelezele ukuyovakashela omunye.

Ukungena ekwelashweni kwabashadile kungavula iziteshi zokuxhumana, kokubili wena kanye nomunye nomunye, futhi kukusize uthole ukuthi yini okungenzeka ukuthi ikufikise endaweni lapho omunye umlingani ebonakala enganaki kanti omunye efuna kakhulu izindlela zokubuyisela uthando. Uma udinga usizo, insizakalo yokwelulekwa yeBonobology iseduze nje. Ukwelashwa kuzokusiza futhi uma uzibuza ukuthi ungakwamukela kanjani ukuthi umyeni wakho akakuthandi. Engeza eminye imisebenzi yokuzinakekela, njengokudla ukudla okunempilo, futhi uzomangala ngemiphumela emihle elethayo.

Sithemba ukuthi uthole izixazululo ezibambekayo zokuthi ungenza kanjani umyeni wakho aphinde akuthande. Noma ngabe kwenzekani, ubuhlobo bakho nomyeni wakho bungalungiswa kuphela uma uzimisele. Ngamathiphu ethu wokuthi yini okufanele uyenze uma umyeni wakho engakuthandi, ungasindisa ubudlelwano bakho ukuthi buphele ngendlela ebuhlungu. Thina ngokuphelele ukhula ukuze uphumelele!

Uma kwenzeka uzizwa ufinyelele kwangqingetshe, thatha usizo lwabeluleki, abazokusiza ufunde ukwamukela umyeni wakho akakuthandi. Ungakhathazeki, akukakabi ukuphela kwendlela kuwe. Zithembe futhi wenze ukuxhumana nalabo abakwazisayo.

Imibuzo Evame Ukubuzwa

Izizathu Ezi-3 Eziphezulu Ezenza Umbhangqwana Ulwe Ngezinto Ezifanayo

Izindlela Ezi-15 Ezihlakaniphile Zokubhekana Nomkhwekazi Okhohlisayo, Onobuqili

Izinto Ezingu-16 Zothando Ongazisho Kumyeni Wakho

Umnikelo wakho awuyona iminikelo yokusiza . Kuzovumela i-Bonobology ukuthi iqhubeke nokukulethela ulwazi olusha nolusesikhathini njengoba sifuna ukusiza noma ubani emhlabeni ukuthi afunde ukwenza noma yini.